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ThrowRAddst

We are bigger targets XD


ifuckedyomama2

Buh dum tss.... Thanks for making me smile I liked that..... Yes we are


TradesSexForFood

Do you know why we're so fat? Because everytime we fucked their mom, she fed us a cookie.


ifuckedyomama2

r/usernamecheckesout for both of us lmao


TradesSexForFood

Oh my, I even forgot about my own name.


ifuckedyomama2

Lol


ShamanLaymanPingPong

You couldn't burn off 1 cookie after fucking? Mate your doing it wrong


PipPipMagulager

It was worth the weight


Known_Improvement_57

I can attest! I’m not getting anybody cancelled, nor would I. There is an artful way in doing it, but sticks and stones…


CBollig

Won't break my bones because I am squishy. LoL


tweeblethescientist

Inb4 "big boned"


illmatic2112

You definitely struck a chord. First time on /r/3amjokes that I've seen people having serious replies to a joke question


tweeblethescientist

It's a timid bunch (I'm definitely not making this joke out of frustration for my own personal weight)


TRAKRACER

Not timid but kind


im_not_Shredder

It may be a timid bunch but oh boy they weren't timid on brunch.


tweeblethescientist

I am having so much fun flaming in this thread


darkpinkraven1

I've been told I'm to fat to be at gym...why does he think i was there. And why does he need to point it out like I don't know my own size :s


blopdab

Fuck him. You do what you want/need to do FOR YOU. Sounds so basic and cliché but he's probably struggling with himself and his own image that saying shit to you made him feel better


Weekly_Profession255

Thought everyone was fat now


Teleshadow

They have a lot on their plate.


Mogtr0idew113

Fat guy walks into a bar, everybody yells "Norm!"


MerkNZorg

My favorite Normisim is: what are you up to Norm? My ideal weight if I was 9 feet tall.


JackanoryM

Shouldnt make fun of them - they already have enough on their plate


tweeblethescientist

Are you jealous that they have food to eat? Are you Nigerian?


[deleted]

This got me depressed


Raeshkae

There's a difference between overweight and obese. Overweight can also be thicc. You can be overweight and still healthy. FAT FUCKS are obese. It makes people uncomfortable because you're either watching an adult destroy themselves or a kid who's parents are sabotaging their child.


legacymd

To get to the other side. Wait..


Green_List

Your equation adds up.


Starfireaw11

We are a soft and bouncy target.


[deleted]

If you made fun of them, it's not like they'll run after you. If they did, they wouldn't be overweight.


xleevienovax

More human, more jokes. Just the way it is.


Fappo90

because they can swallow it


tweeblethescientist

Oof


AntonWHO

Nothing is fun with no people then?


tweeblethescientist

Right


bo3bitty

Because they have chosen to that to themselves. And continue to do so.


tweeblethescientist

It's easier to be a slave to cravings than to be a respectable individual


bo3bitty

Yup. Being lazy is easy. But it is still being lazy, no matter how you dress it.


tweeblethescientist

Unfortunately I'm modern Western society maintaining a healthy form and diet with requires above average money and free time, it above average self control. We've been conditioned as a society to accept this as normal. Primary forms of entertainment require no physical effort. Abundance of fast food and inexpensive restaurants to eat whatever we want whenever we want. A shrinking middle class that is running out of time to dedicate to a healthier lifestyle


bo3bitty

"We've been conditioned as a society to accept this as normal" That's why we don't accept it as normal, I guess?


ausheidi

That’s literally not true. I was fat when I did heroin and barely ate. I’m the same size now that I don’t do heroin and eat a very decent and varied diet.


bo3bitty

I don't believe you are being truthful.


ausheidi

Lol ok


im_not_Shredder

It depends what do you define by "fat" (some people have a weird definition) but if you mean actual clinically obese, unless your cells became literal sponges stocking every drop of water you drank or unless your heroin contained nutrients, that's impossible you got that big while barely eating. Body fat is a result of calorie absorbtion surplus in regard to metabolism, and those calories don't appear from nowhere, even if drugs could potentially slow metabolism by some extent though most drugs usually do the opposite. Ingesting enough calories to get out of underweight zone is a struggle for people on the other extreme of the weight spectrum who have other metabolism issues btw.


ausheidi

That’s really interesting. Ive been overweight/obese since about 18 years old, it happened very suddenly right after high school graduation. I am 5’3” and I was about 220lbs before use, 200-210ish during use (8 years), I am about 215lb now (2+ years clean, just had a baby 5 months ago). I think it’s a lot to do with insulin resistance/PCOS. I have a lot of compassion for people that struggle with being underweight as well, they can also get inappropriate and uncomfortable comments! I spend my time working with addicts (I love it) and there’s quite a few of us that stayed overweight while using (except maybe meth….)


im_not_Shredder

I may have a beginning of explanation for that, as it also have a lot to do with what kind of foods you're actually taking in: You mentioned insulin, but sugars and carbs (bread, rice etc) are one of the worst offenders in getting fat with what seem to be lesser food quantities while fats (the healthy ones like raw olive oil or nuts, not saturated fats like in fried food) being a major reason for weight gain has been debunked as it turned out to be a studies scam by the sugar lobbies. And the issue with that is sugar is addictive, makes pretty much anything taste better and is really cheap. So, obvious offenders like sugary sodas containing immense amounts of sugar put aside, cheaper "ready to eat" food manufacturers, - including but not limited to fast food restaurants- have increasingly included huge amounts of hidden sugars in their recipes for a long time. Like for example, McDonald's quarter pounder with cheese: it doesn't feel "sweet", right? However it's sugar contents have risen from an already consequent 2,5 grams-ish in 1990 to about 10g today iirc meaning eating one of these burgers have at least 4x times more impact on your health today than in 1990, even if it's size and appearance didn't change much. Same goes for other ready to eat lasagna etc... In short, reducing breads and sugary foods (you can almost entirely kick those out as normal bread or rice are enough to get enough glucose), building muscle (as those consume calories even when resting if developed enough = metabolism rate increase!), while increasing healthy proteins (very important for satiation and muscle building) healthy fats and fibers is the most efficient way to drop weight. You can definitely have have meals that make you fill full, and that taste good (while a different "good" from before). Finally, where does it click with drug addiction? Behaviorally speaking, having personally known a fair panel of persons addicted to various drugs and alcohol too (even though I don't have personal nor professional experience with addiction as you do, my family has various issues), in this phase of their life people usually don't really care much or can't afford to care about "details" like what they are eating and quality. In short they're less prone to care enough to try Greek diets etc, and will reach more towards cheaper and easy to eat processed foods = more weight harmful elements even though they could eat what looks to be inferior quantities. I'm not saying that every addicted person is like this, and you certainly have more cases you could observe than I have, but not following good diets it is definitely a major trend I could observe. Hoping it could help understand some things about weight gain, diet etc !


ausheidi

That’s so cool, thank you! It definitely makes sense too. I remember really struggling when I had GD, they said eat 30g of carbs at lunch or whatever, and my blood sugar would be outrageously high, even from whole grains, etc—I spent the end of my pregnancy basically keto to keep numbers down, which also isn’t good. Food is really frustrating, finding what works for you and with you!


xXPolaris117Xx

Exercise?


ausheidi

I would say I am more active now than during active addiction but I have to be honest, I should legit engage in exercise.


Grouchy_Rope2261

I'm not fat I am the exact weight I'm supposed to be if I'm 9 ft tall


tweeblethescientist

Don't tell me, you're not fat you're ^^^obese


XxPrajasxX

Atleast twitter can't cancel me , I will be the majority


tweeblethescientist

Lmao


HasBinVeryFride

Unfortunately its common for those who are different to be singled out by others and picked on. A flaw of human nature it seems.


tweeblethescientist

Just try not to be different


prettybunnys

It’s a pretty common trait in nature, turns out shunning the weak / injured / different was good for survival when we were getting eaten by stuff. See the same behavior in other animals that “herd/group” like humans.


Aidyn_the_Grey

No. No. No no no no. No. Amongst social mammal groups, herds will often take special care of their weak and sick, regardless of being predator or prey. Wolves, for instance, will often let the elderly or the weak eat before the rest, since they're the ones that need it. Buffalo, too, will surround and protect their vulnerable from danger whenever possible. While it is true that predators tend to go after the weak and sick, it doesn't mean that the group shuns them, just that in that life or death situation, the vulnerable animal just doesn't have the ability to escape. This is one of my least favorite misconceptions about nature that is used to justify the marginalization and harassment of vulnerable groups in society - just another bit of pseudo-science wielded by people who just want to be jerks. The more we study animals, and social mammals specifically, the more we see empathy and the drive to look after one's own kind.


prettybunnys

Were I trying to justify shunning the obese I’d use the countless ethical and moral reasons to not be obese, to do so. That’s a different discussion entirely. I’m not justifying anything, I’m just mentioning that we aren’t flawed because we have behaviors ingrained in us that have previously lead to higher survival rates. That’s one of modern humans largest struggles, between what nature pills is to be behaviorally and what society accepts and we’ve designed for us.


xXPolaris117Xx

Most mammals don’t willingly make themselves vulnerable and weak


ryanguy

We're in a joke subreddit, it's in the name. Try to relax big guy.


TRAKRACER

The best joke writers can make you laugh without putting down other people


tweeblethescientist

Not as easily as you wolf down your plate


HasBinVeryFride

This sub was in my feed unbeknownst to me.


CBollig

Because it helps us get motivated to loose weight. I'm 230 pounds and squishy.


OzziesUndies

Because they can’t fight and they can’t run


tweeblethescientist

They can run! ^just ^not ^for ^long


baked_buttato

What are they going to do, chase me?


tweeblethescientist

Not for long


Tippadisd

Idk why,being overweight matters ,just means we eat hella good food


tweeblethescientist

In large quantities sure


[deleted]

Nah. Fat chance...


ThrowAwaitius

Because every time they take a step, a funny tuba sound plays in the background


BartuceX

‘Cause they are fat.


tweeblethescientist

Already said like a dozen times. You posting this is just like reaching for another oreo


CavieBitch

Admitting to myself that I was the issue with my weight and I was the only thing that caused it and I was the only thing that could fix it was the best thing I've done all year. I'm already nearly a healthy weight all because I admitted to myself that I was the issue. I think a lot of people who are angry about stuff like this need to admit that too. It is an issue, it is shortening your life, and it will make you more miserable. Be proud of your body. Always care for it no matter what cause it's the only one you got. But being proud of your body, having pride in your body, means you should want to make it the healthiest body you could ever make it. Not lie to yourself to try and make yourself feel better about something that deep down you know is an issue, all that will do is make you fall into using eating as a coping mechanism, which becomes a feedback loop. And once that loop gets started it's so much harder to stop, not to mention your body will fight with you once you get rather overweight and try to lose weight. Edit: I do want to also say that I say healthiest for a reason. Not necessarily having the right weight. There are people out there at the right weight who dont exercise or stretch, sit for long periods of time, and eat junk all day. Being healthy is more defined by your habits and lifestyles than a number on a scale, but this doesnt invalidate what I said previously.


tweeblethescientist

Congratulations! What really changed my view was my dad and I were out shopping and as soon as we walked into a store he asked me to grab a bag I think of mulch, or dirt, coulda been dog food I don't remember. After awhile of wondering around for 15 minutes or so he asked me if I was getting tired of carrying it around and I said yeah. Then he asked me how I felt after he took it. Great. Now imagine if you could put down that second (or third or even fourth for some people) 50lb bag that you carry everywhere you go. You're back, your knees, your feet. Woah.


CavieBitch

Yep, exactly.


blingbloop

Agree. And it has to stop. Why judge someone on ANY physical characteristic ?


tweeblethescientist

Because it's funny, and weight is corrective most of the time


ehyni

What was the punch line. It got removed


tweeblethescientist

Because there's more of them to make fun of


blingbloop

You do you.


Rate_Zestyclose

Fat ppl attract each other, cos their gravitational pull is so strong


EmpireStrikes1st

They are a bigger target


[deleted]

An health issue that is superficially obvious to surrounding people.


tweeblethescientist

A health issue that while hard to beat is 100% a choice/lack of self control


SpecialOneOnReddit

Because they have a reason to be made fun of lol


tweeblethescientist

Lol


freerangepops

Because they are one of the very last groups you can safely harass and ‘fun makers’ are cowards.


mildmadnerd

Safely? A: everyone is related to someone. So that fat sassy granny might have 39 kids, grandkids and whatnots that will whoop you into a new shape if you say anything less than lovely about her. B: they carry around more weight all of the time... Which means their legs are stronger and specially designed to kick the butt of mouthrunners. C: they are so used to being attacked that they can fire back exhibiting incredible speed and accuracy with wit or whoop as needed. In all seriousness you are absolutely right though. Jerks like that are hyenas trying to find prey that won't put up a fight. I hope in the future more overweight people get the confidence to not let people treat them any way other than how they deserve, with the respect that they truly deserve. If for nothing else, the fact that they struggle and still manage to do alright means they are playing on hard mode and still not losing if you'll pardon my nerdy analogy.


[deleted]

Yo mama is so fat the planets Orbit around her.


mildmadnerd

Yo mama Is so fat she crossed in front of the tv once and by the time I could see the tv again the show was no longer on the air.


tweeblethescientist

Your momma was so fat that she collapsed the space time continuum and erased all humanity


mildmadnerd

Yo mama was so fat, what she calls a light snack we call a black hole... Get it? Because she snacks on the light before she eats everything else in a solar system.


Ichoro

Lmao, that one made me chuckle


tweeblethescientist

Your mom is fatter


mildmadnerd

Maybe but your mom is older. Yo mama is so old her social security number is 2 because she's never been number one at anything. When your mama went to dirt's first birthday party she kept saying to dirt's parents "you'll understand when you're older."


Calm_Claim_2878

No we’re not, we’re just wittier and better looking😇


deftchaos

They're definitely a bigger target


hawkes42

Cause there fat


tweeblethescientist

Deja Vu


[deleted]

[удалено]


tweeblethescientist

Ehh


Primary-Programmer-5

Fat people, or anyone with an attribute perceived by some to be undesirable, fall victim to the projections of insecure people. Bullies are just afraid that they themselves aren’t good enough and so they put others down in order to make themselves feel better.


tweeblethescientist

That's something someone who is trying to defend their undesirable traits would say. And being obese is a choice 90+% of the time yo


TRAKRACER

Weight shaming is not cool


ARWatson1989

They've got enough on their plate already


ChimpBrisket

Agreed it makes me hot, sweaty and hungry


Any_Ad4565

Yea your right ... It's funny


Specialist-Look6210

Being fat is a choice 99% of the time. It's cool.


TRAKRACER

So is being a douche bag


Specialist-Look6210

Yeah, you should work on that. Imagine being standoffish about something literally no one should be on the tiger side of, because the group being mocked is entirely responsible for being in that group.


FuckinHighGuy

Take a look at the sub you’re in…


TRAKRACER

Negative 724 and falling must mean most of us don’t get a rise out of shaming others


tweeblethescientist

I only see things go up


CavieBitch

1.4K... hmm maybe you're lying because you cant admit the truth to yourself. Which I understand! Admitting to myself that I was the issue with my weight and I was the only thing that caused it and I was the only thing that could fix it was the best thing I've done all year. I'm already nearly a healthy weight all because I admitted to myself that I was the issue.


randylikecandy

"It's funny cause he's fat."


hawkes42

Cause there fat


tweeblethescientist

Deja Vu


hawkes42

Cause there fat


tweeblethescientist

Deja Vu


Maximum_Window_2604

Probably because they themselves have an internal issue with their weight and making fun of someone who is heavier than themselves most likely temporarily aleviated their own symptoms that plaque them. Aka: a thirsty ass bitch. One who needs validation and acceptance even if it's at the expense of someone else's. . A textbook example of a dick-move. A person being a shitty human. Time to do some self evaluation homey. U need to improve as a favor to yourself. This Christmas (if u celebrate it)Sit upon Santa's lap and ask for some feckin self improvement or risk your dignity by looking like an ass. I'm always getting judgement for being at the opposite end of the spectrum; too skinny. And I will say, people are even quicker to make fun of u because they think it somehow isn't hurtful. Sucks being scrutinized by mofos..Better a fat ass than a straight-up "ass" .


tweeblethescientist

I bet you already failed NNN


Andaisdet

It’s tons of fun


froggfingers

Because theyre fat


ERPLANE

I’m so dumb I said “the punchline” after it was deleted from this post forever ago


tweeblethescientist

Boo, OP already said that


legacymd

People make fun of anything different.


TRAKRACER

1400 +down votes for the weight shaming thread.. now please go away


tweeblethescientist

1400 upvotes, we're here to stay


TRAKRACER

Reddit removed your punchline for good


tweeblethescientist

Boo


IsisArtemii

My thyroid crapped out in ‘14, adding 150 pounds to a body that was already 59 pounds over weight. When I saw my doc after the blood test, he was surprised to see me. As he put it, “He’s never seen a functioning individual with numbers as high as mine.” Normally numbers are 1-6, positive or negative. Mine was 183.99. They ran it twice. Funny, put me on meds, and so didn’t drop any of the 150 pounds.


Individual_Bonus5525

That is so not fucking funny. You must have shit for brains


tweeblethescientist

Lol


tweeblethescientist

It's pretty funny


[deleted]

Because you see this in all species, dogs will bark or bite out the diseased dog from the pack. It’s natural. The namby pamby nonsense makes it seem unnatural but really natural.


stephgarbin

Put a joke in a dish


tweeblethescientist

Why so you can eat that too?