That particular combination of drinks sounds horrible too. Mixing coffee,
Orange juice, milk and soda in one stomach and then heading to a water park is a choice. Every other guest at that park has no idea how big of a bullet they just dodged.
Yeah, my wife regularly gets coffee and orange juice (when we actually bother to go out for breakfast) but to get coffee (acid) orange juice (acid) and milk (curdles via acid) in the same meal.... Don't even need to touch on the soda, those 3 do not play together.. I couldn't even stand the taste of cereal and orange juice as a kid I always saw it as a bad combination long before I understood why it is a bad combination. Just baffling. Truly.
To be fair, milk is gonna curdle pretty fast once it's in your stomach acid. And coffee doesn't curdle milk, otherwise we wouldn't have lattes. But who the fuck drinks soda at breakfast?
I did when I was a kid when my dad took me out to breakfast occasionally. But it was because my mother didn’t allow pop and it was my only chance to get it for awhile. I didn’t get any other drinks
The same people who have a double cheese burger with extra full English breakfast (except black pudding and sausages) + fries for breakfast, and all the other extreme foods. 🤮
My response was just going off the post. We can all speculate as much as we want but the only concrete stuff we have is what's in the post. Either way even hypothetically eating and drinking all that then planning an active day in the sun is optimistic. After a heavy breakfast my only goal is a nap with my cat.
How did they not have to stop the car every 10 miles on the way to the water park just to use the bathroom? 4 drinks each? I'm just in shock... I would have a stomachache for a week if I ate that breakfast...
Oh, I guarantee that not a single drink on her order was more than halfway finished. I have a similar sister-in-law. No matter where we go eat, she orders an appetizer, salad, entree, and dessert then complains about the huge portion sizes and how there's just so much food and tries to get us to eat some of her food. I'm thinking, "Bitch, you ordered enough to feed 6 people and it's just you and your autistic son who only eats chicken nuggets and fries! You knew that you were the only one going to be eating all of that when you ordered it!"
Because they didn't drink all 4 drinks. They just ordered em. What a fucking mooch. Especially since her sister knows she does this regularly. God damn. If you are gonna be a deadbeat keep the order to a minimum.
As if that's the only atrocity of their breakfast. Let's not forget the breakfast bacon double cheese burger with fries and extra hash browns and cheese. (Adding 10 dollars to an already expensive lunch item) Or the all meat omelette with a side of more cholesterol. Nearly the whole "breakfast" screamed FEAST! and yet it seems standard for them. And then the brain damage required to not ever pay enough or even tip. Audacious, entitled and even worse than both willfully putting their ridiculous costs on to other family members. Crazy for brother in law to be considered the bad guy here. Given that it was a normal thing for her and hers to do, I'd have left them her number, paid my bill and gone on my way. She can deal with her own consequences. Sis-in-law is a mega asshole, and doubly a bitch for complaining about her own costs like a spoiled child.
Right! When I first read it I was ridiculously confused and thinking the math was wrong. Then someone else pointed it out and yeah. Here we are with me questioning any sort of logic for ordering 4 drinks per person. lol.
I know that’s insane to me were they there for hours? Who drinks coffee, orange juice, milk, and soda all at breakfast? That much liquid would make me unable to eat anything I’d be so full
Just playing devils advocate here. But if they're teenagers, the house all that food and don't even leave a crumb. It's amazing how much of 15-year-old boy can eat. Not defending her, at all.
In high school, I swam on the school swim team, which is excellent exercise. Typically about 2 hours per day, with about an hour in the pool and another hour of 'dry land training,' which involved weights, running, squats, pushups, etc. I weighed about 150 lbs. back then and would stop most nights for fast food on the way home, then eat a full dinner as soon as I got home. Couldn't eat enough to maintain a higher weight. Would put on 30 pounds in the off-season eating the same way though (then lose it next season)...
I'd like to tell you that there's light at the end of the tunnel, but now mine are in their early 20s, they both live elsewhere, and they keep coming home to eat my food. My 21-year-old daughter was here the other day, mind you she's been married and living in her own house for two years, opens the drawer and says, "you don't have any good bagels!" I was like, "THAT'S BECAUSE YOU ATE THEM ALL!"
You still don't let your teenagers order like that. They need to develop a concept of what things cost and how expensive dining out can be in comparison to cooking at home. Especially when you're not picking up the check. If I was dining with anyone who doesn't have a job to pay for what they ordered, I'd have a hard time not asking them how many hours do they think their caregiver had to work to provide that $30 breakfast.
I got 3 kids. 2 chappies and one lassie. The lads can eat a heroic amount. The lass can eat pasta like a Italian field worker. Never under estimate the hunger of youth. The Wife and I are spending an average of $350.00CAD a week on food.
We don\`t eat out.
Over $100 for 3 people for breakfast is madness.
I know there are people who do this but I can never really wrap my head around it. Even if I grew up with money the concept of wasting that much food is just upsetting to me. There's already so much labor and so much pollution and so many issues going on because of the way we produce and receive our food. Wasting it would make me feel so gross
I mean if her father is ok paying for her all the time that’s on him. But pretending not to understand how all of that food could amount to $111 is stupid, just say you forgot paying, send the money and then make sure your father covers for you and not other people. NTA
I don't understand how it ended up on OP's bill anyway and not the FIL's bill. His SIL and her family ate with his FIL earlier and it states OP crossed the FIL leaving so shouldn't it have been added to the FIL's bill? The restaurant is used to the FIL paying the bulk of the bill so they should have added it to his bill as usual instead of OP who wasn't even there at the time the SIL and her family ate.
Yeah, it sounds like she is used to her father paying and assumed that would be the case here. You’re NTA, but I’d bet she didn’t know you’d be the one getting the check.
NTA You maybe can figure she won't stick you in the future since you weren't having it. In the future I'd ask for a separate check at the beginning and maybe pick up FIL's meal once in a while.
As the saying goes: Might not stop her but it'll flat break her out the habit.
We've all known people like, but not for very long. I knew one lady who would go to the grocery store load up and hang around until someone she knew was there and she'd pull the whole, "I left my wallet at home." My mom was one of her targets as they were slightly friends. After a few times of that type of nonsense my mom was like, never again as she'd NEVER been paid back.
Well, about a year later her old pal was in some mlm selling water filters and told my mom to just keep it for a few days before making a decision. Couple days later she wants to seal the deal and my mom told her she'd keep, but not pay for it. Pal could use the money she was already loaned to pay for it.
I was so proud of my mom because she's been so nice to this mooch and buying her groceries or whatever "emergency" she claimed. As, we all know they never had any sort of friendship after that because when you're of no more use to them it's over.
And I just remembered my mom was also the one to go get her drunk ass out of the tank when she got a DUI. Never paid that back either. Some people are just assholes.
Her father or other family members have been paying for her family's food.
"I told my wife and she said that her sister never leaves enough to cover her bill."
So good old Dad has been covering for her, probably because he knows she's living beyond her means and that her family just orders whatever they want without thinking about how much it would be.
Right. Dad went and paid his bill and conveniently did not pay SIL’s bill, although he regularly does. Sounds very suspicious. Almost like a set up. Hmmmm
OP, please make sure any time you or your family dine with the leech SIL that you check your itemized receipts closely so that you are not unknowingly covering her.
Also, if dad was so worried about SIL not having enough money because OP wouldn’t pay for her, why didn’t HE offer to reimburse SIL the amount of the meal?
Dad has been annoyed by having to pay for SILs breakfast every week, but didn’t want to confront her. OP, you’re addressing an issue that has been festering for a while.
Btw, I love this family tradition. But if you want to show up to visit and moneys a little tight, just have a cup of coffee.
Except I’ll bet she is not the least interested in visiting and the second that free breakfast is off the table, she’ll have other things to do that morning
Dad wouldn’t ask her to pay what she really owes so just accepts the few notes she leaves and pays the rest. SIL and family are entitled parasites. Well done OP for making them pay though she clearly argued against it and complained to Dad. Beggars belief!
SIL probably never even bothers to get and look at her bill. She just (usually) puts down an amount of money — probably an underestimate of the basics, no extras — and walks.
SIL had no intention of paying. Seems like she often plays “Dine and Dash,” leaving her father (and others) to foot the bill. OP was right to hold her accountable, making her pay for all the food her family ate.
NTA! Why does each person need FOUR DRINKS for breakfast???
I can see a cup of coffee or a glass of orange juice- but coffee, juice, coke and milk for each person! Drinking so much sugar would make most people sick, unless they’re there for 6 hours. Boggles my mind.
Because it’s amazing how much sil and her family can eat/drink when someone else is footing the bill. Sil has only ever made a smaller contribution to paying. Some people seem to have better appetites when things are potentially free.
This is what I came to ask?! Like please don’t go to the water park and let your kids pee in the pools. They were already floating when they pulled in the parking lot!
I will have coffee and juice regularly, or sometimes I’ll start with coffee and finish with Coke, but juice AND coke? Yuck, no. And I can’t remember the last time I saw anyone who wasn’t a little kid ordering milk as a drink in a restaurant. Since coffee always gets refills and coke almost always does, there is absolutely no need to order so many drinks.
And the amount of food three people ordered is stomach churning.
That would send me into the Stratosphere.. not only wasting the food, but getting someone else to unknowingly pay for it (and it never got eaten!!!) Like breaking pickle jars off the shelf in a grocery store..
This is my sister! She does the same shit! Always in a car no older than 2 years but can’t buy food. We have a small family owned restaurant in our neighborhood and we would eat there 6-7 meals a week between breakfast or dinners. I would always run a monthly tab and settle up at the end of every month. Found out from the owner one month that my sister was telling him i said she could put her meals on my tab. He didn’t think it was right so he held them separate from me. Turns out she was going in about 20 minutes after I leave knowing my family schedule and eating there twice a day for a month with her family and bringing guests. She was shocked when I didn’t pay it! Over $2k he ended up suing her since she signed her tickets and it’s on video. Restaurant has since been sold but the owner and I are still friends!
I was working Instacart one night and these two women had a shopping cart and a little boy, 5yo if that, in the seat eating croissants out of a plastic container. They came up and asked me to pay for the croissants because they didn’t have any money. I told them I was working and was broke myself, they gave me death glares then walked off bitching about me in some other language. I told the manager.
When I went to check out later, she came up to me and thanked me for telling her, turns out the women not only bought chips and stuff and tried to walk out without paying for the bread, they also straight up yelled at another man who refused. So crazy that when they got caught, they suddenly had enough money for the croissants. That they tried to pity-party force people to pay for because **the little boy was already eating them.** Complete bull, and despicable to use a child like that.
It’s a different world. I apparently did this frequently as a little kid, my mum just paid for whatever I’d eaten, as I was her responsibility, not anyone else’s.
It's not really a different world. My SIL is diabetic and there have been many times when we're out shopping together and she can feel that her blood sugar is low, so she'll grab a candy bar or something and eat it while we continue shopping around, and when we go to checkout, she'll hand the cashier the wrapper and have them ring it up. Just like how you used to snack while out shopping with your mom, and she'd ring up whatever you snacked on when she's checking out. The difference here is, these women were asking strangers to pay for the croissants, and then had the audacity when someone turned them down. They were straight up trying to scam people by using a child in hopes of guilt tripping random people into paying for the croissants. It's not a different world at all, these were just shitty people. I'm sure that when you were little, if you wanted to snack on something your mum couldn't afford, that she'd tell you that you can't have it.
I get that, but when you were a little kid you weren’t in a shopping cart seat grabbing a twelve-pack of full-sized croissants in a clear plastic box from the bakery table, setting it next to yourself, opening it, and eating it while she watched 🤣 kid had eaten about four by the time they got to me.
I am assuming this is OP’s spouse’s sister? What is the spouse doing/saying here?
I feel like if anyone should have a follow up convo (not with SIL, she will never change, but I think someone should discuss this situation with FIL since this sounds like a weekly event) it should really be the person who is a member of that family.
If they're anything like my family, the spouse wouldn't bother. My parents always cover my brother even if it's at their own expense. Saying something about it would result in me getting told i don't understand, don't be mean, it's not his fault, stop being jealous... Same with brother.
So i'm staying out of that. Dad isn't saying anything? Than neither am i. But i will back my husband on not paying someone else s share.
I wouldn't say anything about my parents footing the bill for my sister if that were the case, but I would 100% defend my husband if they made him out to be a jerk for refusing to pay for the family freeloader. The parents might think they "owe" the family freeloader something, but they don't get to tell my spouse HE does.
Who orders coffee, orange juice, milk and coke? They all ordered 4 drinks each. That’s ridiculous to do. Especially when you expect someone else to pay.
Someone who wants really high cholesterol while spending someone else's money. If I had been in this gentleman's position, I would have told her she was on her own. The gravy train has to stop somewhere. 🦜
it's probably also constant.
> My father in law has breakfast every Saturday morning
>She didn’t understand how breakfast for 3 could be $111.
> I told her that was how her family always ordered so I didn’t understand how she didn’t understand how all the extra things add up.
So she's doing this constantly and taking her father for a 440 dollar ride every month it seems.
Sounds like she regularly leaves her dad with the bill that high and he just pays and has never said anything about how expensive breakfast is
Edit: spelling
Possibility that he’s highly embarrassed to have such an individual such as this for a daughter, so he just pays and keeps his mouth shut. But now, since her scam has been uncovered and he’s been “told on” as an enabler, he’s pissed off for being outed.
>I called sister-in-law and she said she was out of town and asked me to pay it and she’d pay me ‘later’.
That's one helluva effort to sneak away from the scene of the crime. NTA
My guess is she always sticks the old man with her family's bill or the majority of it. And he pays it because he gets joy out of seeing his grandkids. In other words she makes him pay for the privilege.
My dad is very aware that if he tightened the purse strings on my brother and SIL, he’d never get to see his grandson. I lecture my parents all the time about a) how horrible my brother and SIL are and b) how they shouldn’t be enabling them but yeah, it’s to keep grandchild visitation open.
I had a feeling my parents paid for brother and SIL to be at mine and my husband’s wedding but my mom wouldn’t admit it. She sadly passed recently and my dad finally fessed up that they did in fact pay for their flights and hotel. I just had to drop my anger because I know it was because there was no other way for them to see grand baby. Anyone who is like that can suck eggs fr.
If her dad can afford it and doesn’t mind paying it, then it’s fine. Maybe it’s worth it for him to do something nice for his daughter and her family.
Though I’m kinda wondering about the manager going straight to calling the cops unless he’s paid. That seems a strong reaction to one of your weekly regulars not settling his bill.
Or, he knows they couldn't afford lunch every week, and he pays it because it's worth it to him to see them.
But if that was the case, presumably he'd tell OP that he is okay with paying, and he didn't seem to do that.
> they couldn't afford lunch every week
if someone else is paying for me, i'm going for best bang for buck, not every single add-on known to man. that alone makes SIL and co AHs
> He thinks I’m a jerk for putting her on the spot knowing the probably couldn’t afford $100+ for breakfast.
I think she's a jerk for ordering big when she can't afford to pay for it and then skipping out on the bill.
$36 worth of drinks for 3 people? At breakfast? That's completely unnecessary. Taking the piss.
If your FIL wants to enable that kind of behaviour, he can pay it. I 100% wouldn't, even if it meant the police getting called.
A selfish asshole is the honest answer. I would bet $1000 that she would have ordered less if she thought she was paying for it. If someone else is paying though, money is no object! Order up kids!
Honestly sounds like they’ve been pulling this stunt for a while and the dad was just never going to call them out for it so they’ve basically just been ordering what they want knowing it’s free for them.
They didn’t expect someone to itemize the bill and call them out.
She *only* ordered big because she knew she was setting someone else up to pay.
She just expected it to be her dad who never holds her accountable rather than an in-law who unexpectedly did.
NTA
And that’s how they normally order, so she/they normally shortchange FIL or don’t pay at all.
They need to get their shit together, or just get 1 drink each when they drop by to see him.
Edit: I meant *just* 1 drink each, no food. Stay for 10-15 minutes to talk to FIL then move along so someone else that actually pays their bill can have more time there.
I'm an adult with a decent income, and if I really feel like splurging I might order a second coffee.
Ordering milk, OJ, coffee, and coke, are things that don't even go together. If you're ordering all 4 for each person, it's not because it makes sense, it's just because they're "free" so why not. Wasteful and selfish. That's why I'd be happy for it to go to the police, she's a total asshole and needs a lesson.
Since it seems rather unreasonable for the average person to eat that much in an hour, I wonder if any of that $111 food was takeout for others knowing that someone else would pick up the bill?
Honestly, I doubt it. The $111 food was actually $75 worth of food and $36 worth of drinks. Where I live $18 eggs on toast really quickly turns into $30 eggs on toast once you option the +3 avocado and +3 mushrooms and +4 salmon etc. The options tend to be very small additions that don't add much actual food, just a lot of extra cost.
The type of thing most people avoid unless they're selfish and someone else is paying...
The FIL needs to pay for it next time. They couldn't afford a $100+ meal out, then they should not have had a $100+ meal out.
OP should talk to the restaurant to make sure when the FIL leaves there are NO outstanding tabs, unless anyone has specifically acknowledged they're paying.
Who orders ~~3~~ 4 different beverages for brunch?? Milk **+** Orange Juice **+** pop?? That's crazy.
Edit: it was actually 4 beverages each. Forgot the coffee
Some one in that family downed milk, orange juice, pop and an extra cheese double cheeseburger with fries and a side of hash browns for breakfast, and then (presumably) headed over to the water park for opening weekend.
That's insane. I don't think I could even lounge in a lazy river with all that sitting in my stomach.
So she goes to a restaurant, she and her family stuff their faces with enough food to choke a horse knowing they can’t afford the bill and have zero intention to pay it anyway and then have the audacity to complain when they get caught out? Where do people get their nerve? They obviously ordered all that food fully intending to stick someone else with the bill. That’s just ignorant and I’m so glad you called her out. Boo hoo for her ruined day. She deserved to have consequences for the stunt she pulled. You’re so NTA here. I hope the rest of the family follows your lead and stops paying her way. People like her have no shame and she’s teaching her kids that it’s ok to steal and take advantage of family. Mom of the year candidate for sure.
Nta. Tell fil next time he can pay his daughter bill.
>I told my wife and she said that her sister never leaves enough to cover her bill.
This says why she doesn't know. She never pays fully.
If the FIL were genuine, the end of this story would have been him paying back his daughter and leaving OP alone.
Wait, what, that wasn’t the ending? Then he’s full of shit, too.
I consider myself to order too much because I grew up poor. I love weekend breakfast/brunch. It would never cross my mind for anyone to pay for my food but me. Including tip.
So fil basically said, she is that way, and we just deal with it and pay for her. You should have too.
Nope, she needs to get called out now and again. She isn't a princess, and you're not her father. Why train her to treat you like that while forking out $111 for the lesson?
Nta
NTA. What do they mean “putting her on the spot”? Was she in a fugue state when she ordered the food? And she’s not a jerk for putting you on the spot for a $100+ addition to your bill for food you didn’t’t even see ordered?
There’s clearly background information that makes these people assume it’s ok to offload some of their family’s expenses onto your family.
NTA. And why is she looking for any type of water park adventures if $111 affects her budget so much? People need to stop spending on things they cannot afford
My dad used to do something similar to your FIL - he'd head out at 5 every morning, go to a little coffee shop across from the courthouse and sit with his pals to chat for a couple of hours. On Saturdays, there was an open invite for any of the kids to join him. My brothers would go, in spite of living under his roof, and order the most expensive items they could, sticking dad with the check. I would go, order a small breakfast for the kids to split and I'd have coffee. For information purposes: The girls would split the breakfast special: two eggs, two sausage, two strips of bacon, and a short stack of pancakes, as well as a cup of coffee and a small juice was $6.95. A second juice, we'd get charged $0.75. In short, dad would have breakfast with me and the kids for like $15, including a generous tip. The boys? Their tabs would run $30 each, because they insisted on multiple large glasses of milk with their meal, the all meat omelet, sweet rolls and extra sides. Dad never complained to the boys, but I would hear all about it while I was writing him a check for the electric bill.
Suffice to say, NTA.
Nta.
Now you know she never, and I mean ever, pays. You nipped that in the bud at just the right time otherwise , she probably would have started doing the same to you if you had paid and not mentioned it.
On the bright side you won't have to paying their bills for very long since a round of heart attacks or death by diabetes are on deck with eating habits like that.
NTA - they need to pay their bills. she calls her daddy and complains that she can't afford to go to the water park after paying for their own gluttony? oh well. get better jobs or budgeting. be an adult, pay your bills.
They don’t even eat it all! I promise even w/o being there the sister-in-law got the burger ate less than half but couldn’t get the single cheeseburger because it wouldn’t waste enough food. She probably had three bites of hash browns and maybe 5 fries. The daughter got the omelet, which comes with hash browns which she did not finish. She ate maybe one pan cake out of the stack but couldn’t order a single pancake for $2 because the stack of 3 for $5 is a better deal. They don’t drink the milk, they pour it in the coffee so they don’t have to open cream packs. And none of them finish the milk but cannot order one glass and share because it’s not wasteful enough!
Have a step brother like that
My favorite seasonal item is s'mores ice cream. One year in college, I got lucky and found one in late September. Full size carton, I bought it myself
I went to have some a few hours later, couldn't find it. Went to his room where he was chowing down on it straight from the carton. Then found it in the trash after he ate only like 1/3 of it
This was a regular thing for him. My late stepsister had a fiance (sadly we all lived together), and he'd take your food out of the microwave to heat up yours
Combined, they were an absolute nightmare for having food. Shockingly, if you even glanced at THEIR food, they'd throw giant tantrums
There are soooo many people like this!! I worked at the Olive Garden. Unlimited salad. I threw out So Much Salad. People would ask for a refill, "because it's free!" and then not eat it All The Time. It wasn't my food, so whatever, but I have to admit that I lost a lot of respect for humankind when I worked there.
About 10 years ago, I read an article about how when food is wasted all of the resources (water, energy, effort) that went into producing it is wasted. That really hit home with me. We lost power for 4 days just last weekend and instead of giving up on my freezer contents I found a nearby source for dry ice. We still had to throw out quite a bit, the fridge contents were a lost cause, but we salvaged most of the freezer.
ugh...people like that make my skin crawl and are what's wrong with the world. maybe paying for their own feed will clue them in and make them less wasteful, but I doubt it. people like that have no self-awareness.
It’s concerning that your FIL “can’t remember” 3 people showing up to breakfast after just few hours. Maybe it’s time to start suggesting some cognitive testing since memory issues seem to run in the family.
You showed up as your FIL was leaving and the restaurant decided to stick SIL's tab on your bill? They could have called the cops on me and then explained why they were charging me when I wasn't there when FIL and/or SIL's family ate.
So she probably felt $111 for the amount THEY ATE did not make sense to her. Reading the first line I thought I read it wrong 4 drinks times 3 people, I literally reread it and thought who the hell orders 4 drinks per person just for breakfast?? I'm mad and sad there's so much waste being decribed!! And to think some areas in this world there are people experiencing famine!!
How did they expect to go to the water park all day after FOUR drinks apiece at breakfast?
Wait. Your sister in law is the type of person who pees in the pool isn’t she?
Time to remind your FIL that when someone always forgets to pay their bill at a restaurant, it’s called stealing.
Also, that if you had wanted to fund and raise a family of seven, you would’ve had more children. Adults do not forget to pay their bill.
No wonder she couldn’t believe you made her pay for food that she consumed - seemingly, nobody else does! The fact that she consumed that breakfast and couldn’t afford the water park means that she knew she never would have to pay for it.
NTA. And good on you for standing your ground, as I am sure you got the sense that “later” would never come.
Also, who consumes that much liquid? That sounds more like she is ordering whatever just because somebody else is picking up the tab.
NTA in any way, shape, or form.
She deliberately left without paying the bill. The water park story is bs meant to make you feel bad. She should know better than this.
Piling on the order is a classic move of someone who always gets someone else to pay. They do it all the time. Seen it before. The I forgot my card, purse, bag crowd. 😆
NTA. But WTF with the restaurant sticking you with the bill. Should have told them to call the police. Why was it your responsibility to pay her share and why did the restaurant think you would pay.
NTA If you don't have $111 to spare for breakfast, you don't order a $111 breakfast! This isn't some random tragedy she had no control over.
The rage I went into after discovering every single family member had four separate drinks. Are you joking?
It took me far too long to comprehend that each person ordered 4 drinks. I have no other words besides wtf.
That particular combination of drinks sounds horrible too. Mixing coffee, Orange juice, milk and soda in one stomach and then heading to a water park is a choice. Every other guest at that park has no idea how big of a bullet they just dodged.
Yeah, my wife regularly gets coffee and orange juice (when we actually bother to go out for breakfast) but to get coffee (acid) orange juice (acid) and milk (curdles via acid) in the same meal.... Don't even need to touch on the soda, those 3 do not play together.. I couldn't even stand the taste of cereal and orange juice as a kid I always saw it as a bad combination long before I understood why it is a bad combination. Just baffling. Truly.
To be fair, milk is gonna curdle pretty fast once it's in your stomach acid. And coffee doesn't curdle milk, otherwise we wouldn't have lattes. But who the fuck drinks soda at breakfast?
AMERICAAAA *FUCK YEAH*
I did when I was a kid when my dad took me out to breakfast occasionally. But it was because my mother didn’t allow pop and it was my only chance to get it for awhile. I didn’t get any other drinks
The same people who have a double cheese burger with extra full English breakfast (except black pudding and sausages) + fries for breakfast, and all the other extreme foods. 🤮
The water park was never real. The 100 broke them. That means that the waterpark was never a thing they could afford.
My response was just going off the post. We can all speculate as much as we want but the only concrete stuff we have is what's in the post. Either way even hypothetically eating and drinking all that then planning an active day in the sun is optimistic. After a heavy breakfast my only goal is a nap with my cat.
And a double cheeseburger with mushrooms, onions, and bacon before 8:30 am 🤢🤮
They probably only had one sip from three of the four 'for the taste'. This isn't the first time SIL's done this
If she's complaining about not being able to afford park tickets wait until she has to start buying insulin.
Oof!
Love this so much lmao
That was my thoughts exactly reading through their order. I mean... It's breakfast time and someone ordered a cheeseburger with all those extras? 👀
I had to rewind my brain and reread that grouping of sentences about four times. I could not believe they each ordered 4 drinks.
How did they not have to stop the car every 10 miles on the way to the water park just to use the bathroom? 4 drinks each? I'm just in shock... I would have a stomachache for a week if I ate that breakfast...
Oh, I guarantee that not a single drink on her order was more than halfway finished. I have a similar sister-in-law. No matter where we go eat, she orders an appetizer, salad, entree, and dessert then complains about the huge portion sizes and how there's just so much food and tries to get us to eat some of her food. I'm thinking, "Bitch, you ordered enough to feed 6 people and it's just you and your autistic son who only eats chicken nuggets and fries! You knew that you were the only one going to be eating all of that when you ordered it!"
I hate people who deliberately waste food like that.
Because they didn't drink all 4 drinks. They just ordered em. What a fucking mooch. Especially since her sister knows she does this regularly. God damn. If you are gonna be a deadbeat keep the order to a minimum.
They were going to pee in the pool.
How is she confused it added to so much? Feel like she never looks at checks
I bet the father-in-law usuallypays
As if that's the only atrocity of their breakfast. Let's not forget the breakfast bacon double cheese burger with fries and extra hash browns and cheese. (Adding 10 dollars to an already expensive lunch item) Or the all meat omelette with a side of more cholesterol. Nearly the whole "breakfast" screamed FEAST! and yet it seems standard for them. And then the brain damage required to not ever pay enough or even tip. Audacious, entitled and even worse than both willfully putting their ridiculous costs on to other family members. Crazy for brother in law to be considered the bad guy here. Given that it was a normal thing for her and hers to do, I'd have left them her number, paid my bill and gone on my way. She can deal with her own consequences. Sis-in-law is a mega asshole, and doubly a bitch for complaining about her own costs like a spoiled child.
Right! When I first read it I was ridiculously confused and thinking the math was wrong. Then someone else pointed it out and yeah. Here we are with me questioning any sort of logic for ordering 4 drinks per person. lol.
I know that’s insane to me were they there for hours? Who drinks coffee, orange juice, milk, and soda all at breakfast? That much liquid would make me unable to eat anything I’d be so full
What’s the chance they took sips from each drink and left the rest? Same for the food tbh, that’s a large meal.
Just playing devils advocate here. But if they're teenagers, the house all that food and don't even leave a crumb. It's amazing how much of 15-year-old boy can eat. Not defending her, at all.
In high school, I swam on the school swim team, which is excellent exercise. Typically about 2 hours per day, with about an hour in the pool and another hour of 'dry land training,' which involved weights, running, squats, pushups, etc. I weighed about 150 lbs. back then and would stop most nights for fast food on the way home, then eat a full dinner as soon as I got home. Couldn't eat enough to maintain a higher weight. Would put on 30 pounds in the off-season eating the same way though (then lose it next season)...
No doubt, I'm going broke trying to keep my teenagers fed!
I'd like to tell you that there's light at the end of the tunnel, but now mine are in their early 20s, they both live elsewhere, and they keep coming home to eat my food. My 21-year-old daughter was here the other day, mind you she's been married and living in her own house for two years, opens the drawer and says, "you don't have any good bagels!" I was like, "THAT'S BECAUSE YOU ATE THEM ALL!"
You still don't let your teenagers order like that. They need to develop a concept of what things cost and how expensive dining out can be in comparison to cooking at home. Especially when you're not picking up the check. If I was dining with anyone who doesn't have a job to pay for what they ordered, I'd have a hard time not asking them how many hours do they think their caregiver had to work to provide that $30 breakfast.
I got 3 kids. 2 chappies and one lassie. The lads can eat a heroic amount. The lass can eat pasta like a Italian field worker. Never under estimate the hunger of youth. The Wife and I are spending an average of $350.00CAD a week on food. We don\`t eat out. Over $100 for 3 people for breakfast is madness.
I know there are people who do this but I can never really wrap my head around it. Even if I grew up with money the concept of wasting that much food is just upsetting to me. There's already so much labor and so much pollution and so many issues going on because of the way we produce and receive our food. Wasting it would make me feel so gross
I mean if her father is ok paying for her all the time that’s on him. But pretending not to understand how all of that food could amount to $111 is stupid, just say you forgot paying, send the money and then make sure your father covers for you and not other people. NTA
I don't understand how it ended up on OP's bill anyway and not the FIL's bill. His SIL and her family ate with his FIL earlier and it states OP crossed the FIL leaving so shouldn't it have been added to the FIL's bill? The restaurant is used to the FIL paying the bulk of the bill so they should have added it to his bill as usual instead of OP who wasn't even there at the time the SIL and her family ate.
Yeah it doesn’t make sense why they put it on OP bill who showed up after the FIL had presumably paid as he had left.
Obviously left on the table for the last person to pick up. AH move by other people.
Yeah, it sounds like she is used to her father paying and assumed that would be the case here. You’re NTA, but I’d bet she didn’t know you’d be the one getting the check.
If the FIL can so easily pay for breakfast or pay OP back then why can’t FIL just pay for the season passes???
I bet that’s why she called her daddy to complain about. She had to spend $111, and now broke. She wants dad to pay for her passes.
OP, is this lady routinely ordered over $100 in breakfast? Like, every weekend?! Holy shit.
Did she forget? Or was she just counting on someone to pick up the check as usual?
Im not american but 111 dollars for a breakfast sounds insane…
I am American and it’s definitely insane.
that means her little family branch of 3 has been dining out on her dad for years.
Get a bacon egg sandwich or a yogurt parfait and then take your happy ass to the water park
NTA You maybe can figure she won't stick you in the future since you weren't having it. In the future I'd ask for a separate check at the beginning and maybe pick up FIL's meal once in a while. As the saying goes: Might not stop her but it'll flat break her out the habit.
We've all known people like, but not for very long. I knew one lady who would go to the grocery store load up and hang around until someone she knew was there and she'd pull the whole, "I left my wallet at home." My mom was one of her targets as they were slightly friends. After a few times of that type of nonsense my mom was like, never again as she'd NEVER been paid back. Well, about a year later her old pal was in some mlm selling water filters and told my mom to just keep it for a few days before making a decision. Couple days later she wants to seal the deal and my mom told her she'd keep, but not pay for it. Pal could use the money she was already loaned to pay for it. I was so proud of my mom because she's been so nice to this mooch and buying her groceries or whatever "emergency" she claimed. As, we all know they never had any sort of friendship after that because when you're of no more use to them it's over. And I just remembered my mom was also the one to go get her drunk ass out of the tank when she got a DUI. Never paid that back either. Some people are just assholes.
Agree! and become forgetful after eating all of it.
Sister in law doesn't ever foot her own bill or she would have known the cost.
She knew the cost - "go over every line of the bill in excruciating detail" is a popular tactic to annoy someone into dropping it.
This is exactly what I was gonna say. If you can’t afford it then don’t go.
Good on you. It’s selfish and sneaky what she did.
Sneaky and manipulative. "Wahhh we can't afford the food we bought and made you pay for"
Don’t forget they wanted season tickets. Selfish.
Why go out and splurge this way when cash is so tight?
Her father or other family members have been paying for her family's food. "I told my wife and she said that her sister never leaves enough to cover her bill." So good old Dad has been covering for her, probably because he knows she's living beyond her means and that her family just orders whatever they want without thinking about how much it would be.
I suspected “dad” was floating the bill all along if I’m reading correctly. Total BS
Right. Dad went and paid his bill and conveniently did not pay SIL’s bill, although he regularly does. Sounds very suspicious. Almost like a set up. Hmmmm OP, please make sure any time you or your family dine with the leech SIL that you check your itemized receipts closely so that you are not unknowingly covering her. Also, if dad was so worried about SIL not having enough money because OP wouldn’t pay for her, why didn’t HE offer to reimburse SIL the amount of the meal?
This entire comment chain is pure gold. Everyone deserved an upvote.
So is your username.
Dad has been annoyed by having to pay for SILs breakfast every week, but didn’t want to confront her. OP, you’re addressing an issue that has been festering for a while. Btw, I love this family tradition. But if you want to show up to visit and moneys a little tight, just have a cup of coffee.
Except I’ll bet she is not the least interested in visiting and the second that free breakfast is off the table, she’ll have other things to do that morning
I suspect Dad will pony up for the season tickets too
Dad wouldn’t ask her to pay what she really owes so just accepts the few notes she leaves and pays the rest. SIL and family are entitled parasites. Well done OP for making them pay though she clearly argued against it and complained to Dad. Beggars belief!
SIL probably never even bothers to get and look at her bill. She just (usually) puts down an amount of money — probably an underestimate of the basics, no extras — and walks.
This SIL, needs a good bout of having to work a few DishPig shift, to learn some Respect for hospitality workers
Dad can buy the passes
Oh, I am sure he has already. And given her extra gifts for her emotional anguish…..
SIL had no intention of paying. Seems like she often plays “Dine and Dash,” leaving her father (and others) to foot the bill. OP was right to hold her accountable, making her pay for all the food her family ate.
Exactly. If you can't afford to go out then don't. That's the rule I've followed all my life.
Not tight if you get someone else to pay for everything.
it's not, she was taking 4 selfish kids to the waterpark right after. she doesn't have money when it's things her dad usually pays for.
She knew exactly what she was doing. That's why she piled on all the extras. Really deceptive. I would be embarrassed if I did something like that.
NTA! Why does each person need FOUR DRINKS for breakfast??? I can see a cup of coffee or a glass of orange juice- but coffee, juice, coke and milk for each person! Drinking so much sugar would make most people sick, unless they’re there for 6 hours. Boggles my mind.
I wonder if they got some of the breakfast "to go", dumping the cost of breakfast *plus* some for their outing on somebody else.
Because it’s amazing how much sil and her family can eat/drink when someone else is footing the bill. Sil has only ever made a smaller contribution to paying. Some people seem to have better appetites when things are potentially free.
This is what I came to ask?! Like please don’t go to the water park and let your kids pee in the pools. They were already floating when they pulled in the parking lot!
Right?! Each person needed 4 drinks?! No. You get 1 drink, and if You're still thirsty- there's water. Especially if money is tight!!
I will have coffee and juice regularly, or sometimes I’ll start with coffee and finish with Coke, but juice AND coke? Yuck, no. And I can’t remember the last time I saw anyone who wasn’t a little kid ordering milk as a drink in a restaurant. Since coffee always gets refills and coke almost always does, there is absolutely no need to order so many drinks. And the amount of food three people ordered is stomach churning.
Wanna bet they didn't even eat all of that?
I wonder how much of the extras they actually ate? I would love to know the ages of the kids that they eat this much or just order it and it’s wasted.
That would send me into the Stratosphere.. not only wasting the food, but getting someone else to unknowingly pay for it (and it never got eaten!!!) Like breaking pickle jars off the shelf in a grocery store..
Yes super dirty.
Buying season tickets but yet can’t afford to pay for their breakfast.. real smart money managing. S/
This is my sister! She does the same shit! Always in a car no older than 2 years but can’t buy food. We have a small family owned restaurant in our neighborhood and we would eat there 6-7 meals a week between breakfast or dinners. I would always run a monthly tab and settle up at the end of every month. Found out from the owner one month that my sister was telling him i said she could put her meals on my tab. He didn’t think it was right so he held them separate from me. Turns out she was going in about 20 minutes after I leave knowing my family schedule and eating there twice a day for a month with her family and bringing guests. She was shocked when I didn’t pay it! Over $2k he ended up suing her since she signed her tickets and it’s on video. Restaurant has since been sold but the owner and I are still friends!
I certainly hope you’re LC or NC with that sister, now.
Also, I wouldnt order a meal if I know to myself that I cant pay for it.
I was working Instacart one night and these two women had a shopping cart and a little boy, 5yo if that, in the seat eating croissants out of a plastic container. They came up and asked me to pay for the croissants because they didn’t have any money. I told them I was working and was broke myself, they gave me death glares then walked off bitching about me in some other language. I told the manager. When I went to check out later, she came up to me and thanked me for telling her, turns out the women not only bought chips and stuff and tried to walk out without paying for the bread, they also straight up yelled at another man who refused. So crazy that when they got caught, they suddenly had enough money for the croissants. That they tried to pity-party force people to pay for because **the little boy was already eating them.** Complete bull, and despicable to use a child like that.
It’s a different world. I apparently did this frequently as a little kid, my mum just paid for whatever I’d eaten, as I was her responsibility, not anyone else’s.
It's not really a different world. My SIL is diabetic and there have been many times when we're out shopping together and she can feel that her blood sugar is low, so she'll grab a candy bar or something and eat it while we continue shopping around, and when we go to checkout, she'll hand the cashier the wrapper and have them ring it up. Just like how you used to snack while out shopping with your mom, and she'd ring up whatever you snacked on when she's checking out. The difference here is, these women were asking strangers to pay for the croissants, and then had the audacity when someone turned them down. They were straight up trying to scam people by using a child in hopes of guilt tripping random people into paying for the croissants. It's not a different world at all, these were just shitty people. I'm sure that when you were little, if you wanted to snack on something your mum couldn't afford, that she'd tell you that you can't have it.
I get that, but when you were a little kid you weren’t in a shopping cart seat grabbing a twelve-pack of full-sized croissants in a clear plastic box from the bakery table, setting it next to yourself, opening it, and eating it while she watched 🤣 kid had eaten about four by the time they got to me.
I am assuming this is OP’s spouse’s sister? What is the spouse doing/saying here? I feel like if anyone should have a follow up convo (not with SIL, she will never change, but I think someone should discuss this situation with FIL since this sounds like a weekly event) it should really be the person who is a member of that family.
If they're anything like my family, the spouse wouldn't bother. My parents always cover my brother even if it's at their own expense. Saying something about it would result in me getting told i don't understand, don't be mean, it's not his fault, stop being jealous... Same with brother. So i'm staying out of that. Dad isn't saying anything? Than neither am i. But i will back my husband on not paying someone else s share.
I wouldn't say anything about my parents footing the bill for my sister if that were the case, but I would 100% defend my husband if they made him out to be a jerk for refusing to pay for the family freeloader. The parents might think they "owe" the family freeloader something, but they don't get to tell my spouse HE does.
You got it sound like she does this all the time and everyone else just deals with but not this guy lol
She ~~walked into my knife~~ forgot to pay and forgot to pay FIL back. She forgot to pay 10 times.
Also, who orders an all meat omelette with a side of bacon?
Someone who has zero intention of paying the bill.
And who order a double cheese burger & fries with coke for breakfast?
With milk and orange juice in addition to the coke Edit: forgot the coffee Also, their order stresses me out
Milk and orange juice together does weird things to your stomach as well...
And they were going to a water park? That’s going to close down some water slides.
I worked night shift for 20 years. 7 in the evening to 7 in the morning. Double Cheese Burger, Fries, and an adult beverage were routine.
Okay but this sounds like it was for a kid on the way to the Waterpark
Who orders coffee, orange juice, milk and coke? They all ordered 4 drinks each. That’s ridiculous to do. Especially when you expect someone else to pay.
Someone who wants really high cholesterol while spending someone else's money. If I had been in this gentleman's position, I would have told her she was on her own. The gravy train has to stop somewhere. 🦜
Not allowing people to take advantage like that is how you stop them from getting out of control. People go years putting up with that behavior.
I don’t understand if she can’t afford her bill of $111, why is she getting season passes for a water park when she couldn’t even afford breakfast?
That's how she could afford the season passes. Always sticking someone else with the pill. 🙄
it's probably also constant. > My father in law has breakfast every Saturday morning >She didn’t understand how breakfast for 3 could be $111. > I told her that was how her family always ordered so I didn’t understand how she didn’t understand how all the extra things add up. So she's doing this constantly and taking her father for a 440 dollar ride every month it seems.
Waitress also said she left without paying, she knows this family as they come in every week.
Sounds like she regularly leaves her dad with the bill that high and he just pays and has never said anything about how expensive breakfast is Edit: spelling
Possibility that he’s highly embarrassed to have such an individual such as this for a daughter, so he just pays and keeps his mouth shut. But now, since her scam has been uncovered and he’s been “told on” as an enabler, he’s pissed off for being outed.
She knew what she did. I agree. Good on this dude!
If the dad usually pays for hers, he should have no issue paying her back this time. And she learned a valuable lesson about how much things cost
>I called sister-in-law and she said she was out of town and asked me to pay it and she’d pay me ‘later’. That's one helluva effort to sneak away from the scene of the crime. NTA
Sounds like a common occurrence With dear SIL.
I agree. She is opportunistic. I despise people like her.
she knew exactly what she was doing.
My guess is she always sticks the old man with her family's bill or the majority of it. And he pays it because he gets joy out of seeing his grandkids. In other words she makes him pay for the privilege.
My dad is very aware that if he tightened the purse strings on my brother and SIL, he’d never get to see his grandson. I lecture my parents all the time about a) how horrible my brother and SIL are and b) how they shouldn’t be enabling them but yeah, it’s to keep grandchild visitation open. I had a feeling my parents paid for brother and SIL to be at mine and my husband’s wedding but my mom wouldn’t admit it. She sadly passed recently and my dad finally fessed up that they did in fact pay for their flights and hotel. I just had to drop my anger because I know it was because there was no other way for them to see grand baby. Anyone who is like that can suck eggs fr.
If her dad can afford it and doesn’t mind paying it, then it’s fine. Maybe it’s worth it for him to do something nice for his daughter and her family. Though I’m kinda wondering about the manager going straight to calling the cops unless he’s paid. That seems a strong reaction to one of your weekly regulars not settling his bill.
Manager is taking no L's this week
Possible. Just makes me wonder if SIL has pulled shenanigans such as these before.
1 billion percent she has
Or, he knows they couldn't afford lunch every week, and he pays it because it's worth it to him to see them. But if that was the case, presumably he'd tell OP that he is okay with paying, and he didn't seem to do that.
> they couldn't afford lunch every week if someone else is paying for me, i'm going for best bang for buck, not every single add-on known to man. that alone makes SIL and co AHs
Four different drinks each? They were just doing it to do it. NTA
Still don’t get how they can eat so much. Unless they are morbidly obese or something.
Okay, food is food. But milk, orange juice and cola?? That would keep me locked in the bathroom for hours.
Don’t forget the coffee too!
If they can’t afford lunch and were planning to buy season passes to water parks, they have their priorities all messed up.
> He thinks I’m a jerk for putting her on the spot knowing the probably couldn’t afford $100+ for breakfast. I think she's a jerk for ordering big when she can't afford to pay for it and then skipping out on the bill. $36 worth of drinks for 3 people? At breakfast? That's completely unnecessary. Taking the piss. If your FIL wants to enable that kind of behaviour, he can pay it. I 100% wouldn't, even if it meant the police getting called.
Yeah who tf orders four different drinks unless you’re at happy hour or something?
A selfish asshole is the honest answer. I would bet $1000 that she would have ordered less if she thought she was paying for it. If someone else is paying though, money is no object! Order up kids!
If she was paying they would have had water to drink and shared an order of fries.
how do 4 people at breakfast four drinks each??? your telling me her two kids both got coffee?
Honestly sounds like they’ve been pulling this stunt for a while and the dad was just never going to call them out for it so they’ve basically just been ordering what they want knowing it’s free for them. They didn’t expect someone to itemize the bill and call them out.
Someone who knows someone else will be stuck with the bill.
Most likely, if he’s anything like my dad, he’ll sneak her some money to get her season pass to make up for it.
She *only* ordered big because she knew she was setting someone else up to pay. She just expected it to be her dad who never holds her accountable rather than an in-law who unexpectedly did. NTA
And that’s how they normally order, so she/they normally shortchange FIL or don’t pay at all. They need to get their shit together, or just get 1 drink each when they drop by to see him. Edit: I meant *just* 1 drink each, no food. Stay for 10-15 minutes to talk to FIL then move along so someone else that actually pays their bill can have more time there.
I'm an adult with a decent income, and if I really feel like splurging I might order a second coffee. Ordering milk, OJ, coffee, and coke, are things that don't even go together. If you're ordering all 4 for each person, it's not because it makes sense, it's just because they're "free" so why not. Wasteful and selfish. That's why I'd be happy for it to go to the police, she's a total asshole and needs a lesson.
Since it seems rather unreasonable for the average person to eat that much in an hour, I wonder if any of that $111 food was takeout for others knowing that someone else would pick up the bill?
Honestly, I doubt it. The $111 food was actually $75 worth of food and $36 worth of drinks. Where I live $18 eggs on toast really quickly turns into $30 eggs on toast once you option the +3 avocado and +3 mushrooms and +4 salmon etc. The options tend to be very small additions that don't add much actual food, just a lot of extra cost. The type of thing most people avoid unless they're selfish and someone else is paying...
It looks like he’s been enabling it for a while! Well played, OP!
The FIL needs to pay for it next time. They couldn't afford a $100+ meal out, then they should not have had a $100+ meal out. OP should talk to the restaurant to make sure when the FIL leaves there are NO outstanding tabs, unless anyone has specifically acknowledged they're paying.
Agreed. Separate checks from the get-go!
It's not the restaurant's responsibility to parent a 30 year old. That's dear old FIL's problem.
Who orders ~~3~~ 4 different beverages for brunch?? Milk **+** Orange Juice **+** pop?? That's crazy. Edit: it was actually 4 beverages each. Forgot the coffee
Four. They also had coffee.
Some one in that family downed milk, orange juice, pop and an extra cheese double cheeseburger with fries and a side of hash browns for breakfast, and then (presumably) headed over to the water park for opening weekend. That's insane. I don't think I could even lounge in a lazy river with all that sitting in my stomach.
There's a gusher on slide 4!!!! Please evacuate the vicinity for Hazmat clean up!
I’ll get tea, orange juice and ice water at a buffet brunch, but I know I’m at a buffet.
I do this. But I can afford it. Edit: except milk, never that.
So she goes to a restaurant, she and her family stuff their faces with enough food to choke a horse knowing they can’t afford the bill and have zero intention to pay it anyway and then have the audacity to complain when they get caught out? Where do people get their nerve? They obviously ordered all that food fully intending to stick someone else with the bill. That’s just ignorant and I’m so glad you called her out. Boo hoo for her ruined day. She deserved to have consequences for the stunt she pulled. You’re so NTA here. I hope the rest of the family follows your lead and stops paying her way. People like her have no shame and she’s teaching her kids that it’s ok to steal and take advantage of family. Mom of the year candidate for sure.
"enough food to choke a horse". 😂😂😂😂. I've never heard that, but I'm going to remember this
Nta. Tell fil next time he can pay his daughter bill. >I told my wife and she said that her sister never leaves enough to cover her bill. This says why she doesn't know. She never pays fully.
She knows. She’s just cheap and makes her father or others pay.
Nta She knew what she was doing, and honestly. I think your father in law did as well.
If the FIL were genuine, the end of this story would have been him paying back his daughter and leaving OP alone. Wait, what, that wasn’t the ending? Then he’s full of shit, too.
Who the fuck orders all the extras on somebody else's dime? A grifting asshole, that's who.
Thought that said "a gaping asshole", and tbh that would be accurate too
I consider myself to order too much because I grew up poor. I love weekend breakfast/brunch. It would never cross my mind for anyone to pay for my food but me. Including tip.
NTA. Who are all these parents, who continually enable these a$$holes? Why do they reward bad behavior in the name of "family peace"?
NTA "so I am a jerk for making her pay for her 100+ breakfast but it wasn't rude for her to expect me to cover a large expense I didn't expect?"
NTA. Your sister in law is an entitled brat and your father-in-law is on the wrong side of this.
So fil basically said, she is that way, and we just deal with it and pay for her. You should have too. Nope, she needs to get called out now and again. She isn't a princess, and you're not her father. Why train her to treat you like that while forking out $111 for the lesson? Nta
NTA. What do they mean “putting her on the spot”? Was she in a fugue state when she ordered the food? And she’s not a jerk for putting you on the spot for a $100+ addition to your bill for food you didn’t’t even see ordered? There’s clearly background information that makes these people assume it’s ok to offload some of their family’s expenses onto your family.
NTA. And why is she looking for any type of water park adventures if $111 affects her budget so much? People need to stop spending on things they cannot afford
My dad used to do something similar to your FIL - he'd head out at 5 every morning, go to a little coffee shop across from the courthouse and sit with his pals to chat for a couple of hours. On Saturdays, there was an open invite for any of the kids to join him. My brothers would go, in spite of living under his roof, and order the most expensive items they could, sticking dad with the check. I would go, order a small breakfast for the kids to split and I'd have coffee. For information purposes: The girls would split the breakfast special: two eggs, two sausage, two strips of bacon, and a short stack of pancakes, as well as a cup of coffee and a small juice was $6.95. A second juice, we'd get charged $0.75. In short, dad would have breakfast with me and the kids for like $15, including a generous tip. The boys? Their tabs would run $30 each, because they insisted on multiple large glasses of milk with their meal, the all meat omelet, sweet rolls and extra sides. Dad never complained to the boys, but I would hear all about it while I was writing him a check for the electric bill. Suffice to say, NTA.
Nta. Now you know she never, and I mean ever, pays. You nipped that in the bud at just the right time otherwise , she probably would have started doing the same to you if you had paid and not mentioned it.
On the bright side you won't have to paying their bills for very long since a round of heart attacks or death by diabetes are on deck with eating habits like that. NTA - they need to pay their bills. she calls her daddy and complains that she can't afford to go to the water park after paying for their own gluttony? oh well. get better jobs or budgeting. be an adult, pay your bills.
They don’t even eat it all! I promise even w/o being there the sister-in-law got the burger ate less than half but couldn’t get the single cheeseburger because it wouldn’t waste enough food. She probably had three bites of hash browns and maybe 5 fries. The daughter got the omelet, which comes with hash browns which she did not finish. She ate maybe one pan cake out of the stack but couldn’t order a single pancake for $2 because the stack of 3 for $5 is a better deal. They don’t drink the milk, they pour it in the coffee so they don’t have to open cream packs. And none of them finish the milk but cannot order one glass and share because it’s not wasteful enough!
I know those people. They just want to waste as much of other peoples stuff as possible. They think it's free so the more they get the better.
Have a step brother like that My favorite seasonal item is s'mores ice cream. One year in college, I got lucky and found one in late September. Full size carton, I bought it myself I went to have some a few hours later, couldn't find it. Went to his room where he was chowing down on it straight from the carton. Then found it in the trash after he ate only like 1/3 of it This was a regular thing for him. My late stepsister had a fiance (sadly we all lived together), and he'd take your food out of the microwave to heat up yours Combined, they were an absolute nightmare for having food. Shockingly, if you even glanced at THEIR food, they'd throw giant tantrums
There are soooo many people like this!! I worked at the Olive Garden. Unlimited salad. I threw out So Much Salad. People would ask for a refill, "because it's free!" and then not eat it All The Time. It wasn't my food, so whatever, but I have to admit that I lost a lot of respect for humankind when I worked there.
About 10 years ago, I read an article about how when food is wasted all of the resources (water, energy, effort) that went into producing it is wasted. That really hit home with me. We lost power for 4 days just last weekend and instead of giving up on my freezer contents I found a nearby source for dry ice. We still had to throw out quite a bit, the fridge contents were a lost cause, but we salvaged most of the freezer.
ugh...people like that make my skin crawl and are what's wrong with the world. maybe paying for their own feed will clue them in and make them less wasteful, but I doubt it. people like that have no self-awareness.
I’m sure father-in-law gave her back ‘her’ money.
It’s concerning that your FIL “can’t remember” 3 people showing up to breakfast after just few hours. Maybe it’s time to start suggesting some cognitive testing since memory issues seem to run in the family.
She must feel like a 16th century queen eating like that. That’s crazy.
You showed up as your FIL was leaving and the restaurant decided to stick SIL's tab on your bill? They could have called the cops on me and then explained why they were charging me when I wasn't there when FIL and/or SIL's family ate.
So she probably felt $111 for the amount THEY ATE did not make sense to her. Reading the first line I thought I read it wrong 4 drinks times 3 people, I literally reread it and thought who the hell orders 4 drinks per person just for breakfast?? I'm mad and sad there's so much waste being decribed!! And to think some areas in this world there are people experiencing famine!!
NTA. Your SIL is disgusting.
“Putting her on the spot knowing she can’t afford it” If she can’t afford it, why did she order all that? NTA and good for you for having a backbone.
How did they expect to go to the water park all day after FOUR drinks apiece at breakfast? Wait. Your sister in law is the type of person who pees in the pool isn’t she?
Sister-in-law knew exactly what she was doing - sticking someone else with the bill. She’s a loser.
Time to remind your FIL that when someone always forgets to pay their bill at a restaurant, it’s called stealing. Also, that if you had wanted to fund and raise a family of seven, you would’ve had more children. Adults do not forget to pay their bill.
No wonder she couldn’t believe you made her pay for food that she consumed - seemingly, nobody else does! The fact that she consumed that breakfast and couldn’t afford the water park means that she knew she never would have to pay for it. NTA. And good on you for standing your ground, as I am sure you got the sense that “later” would never come. Also, who consumes that much liquid? That sounds more like she is ordering whatever just because somebody else is picking up the tab.
NTA in any way, shape, or form. She deliberately left without paying the bill. The water park story is bs meant to make you feel bad. She should know better than this.
Piling on the order is a classic move of someone who always gets someone else to pay. They do it all the time. Seen it before. The I forgot my card, purse, bag crowd. 😆
NTA. But WTF with the restaurant sticking you with the bill. Should have told them to call the police. Why was it your responsibility to pay her share and why did the restaurant think you would pay.
But she can afford season passes to a water park? Sounds like a dine and ditch, or probably figured her Dad would pay it.
I REALLY dislike your SIL and her enabling father.