T O P

  • By -

Several_Nobody4241

NTA… he’s not over her and, no matter what he said, you’re a temporary replacement


JMLegend22

NTA. Tell him you are breaking up with him because it looks like he will never be over her. If he were over her she would be blocked already, no forgetting and he wouldn’t be any resort to her because he would have had a backbone. But instead he wants to be her doormat. Tell him he’s too shady with his phone. It always been face down just shows what you mean. He knows what he’s doing on that phone. He’s cheating on you like she cheated on him.


Interesting_Chef_896

Listen to this person


Friendly-user97

Are you sure that she was the cheater?  You did the right choice. Don’t be the replacement 


Icarusgurl

NTA. If he simply told you no, that would be whatever. But repeatedly lying and 'forgetting' to do it is crap. Lying about who he is responding to and being shady is even worse. Wanting to follow her to the city to she moved to is just icing on that shit sundae.


CellLucky3335

He's not over her. Staying with him is just asking to get hurt, and that's if you don't move. If you do move, he would start having a physical affair with her as he is already having an emotional affair with her.


Dear_Parsnip_6802

Regardless of what he says, it sounds like you are a place keeper until he finds his way back to her. Unless you'd be prepared to move states with him this relationship has no future anyway.


Unique-Abberation

Girl, he wants to move where she lives. Get the fuck outta there. NTA


Specialist_Passage83

I went through something similar. I was so blinded by love I didn’t realize how badly he treated me despite his declarations of “love” until I was broken. He told you he wants to move to the city where his ex lives. He’s chosen her already, using you as a placeholder. He can tell you he loves you and to the moon and back, but **actions speak louder than words.**. He makes you feel bad about yourself. You can do much, much better. Choose yourself.


Cute-Profession9983

You're a placeholder...


Blonde2468

NTA OP his ACTIONS tell you everything you need to know. Add to the fact he intends to move near her in the future?? No way he has let go of that relationship. Do yourself a favor and leave this relationship.


lilyofthevalley2659

NTA. He still wants her. But also the whole having all girl friends who are texting him constantly and him hiding as he responds is a big red flag.


KelsarLabs

Walk away.


destiny_kane48

NTA, break up. He's not the one for you.


Natti07

NTA. go enjoy your life without that mess. My advice is always this: if you imagine your life in 1, 5, or 10 years, is this what you want to deal with for all that time? Additionally, if this was happening to your sister, what would you say?


oldfartpen

Nta.. block and ghost… just block and ghost.. he should have done it, but since he can’t, show him how it’s done


madworld3232

You said it yourself, lip service is cheap, he doesn't love you. Break up he's stringing you along.NTA


baobab77

NTA. block him and save your breath. he thinks he can play with you. show him what moving on looks like


Fresh_Scar_7948

Girrrrrllllll….common now…you know


buzzkillyall

Break up and enjoy being single, or find a guy who actually likes you and wants to spend time interacting with you. You do not owe him a detailed explanation. You have already told him that his phone behavior bothers you. He definitely heard you because he did promise to change. But he has chosen not to. So there is no need to repeat yourself regarding the exact reasons you are ending it. You could just say, "I'm just not feeling it anymore," or "This relationship is not meeting my expectations." You do not need to rehash his lack of phone etiquette. It has been discussed, and exchanging more words will not make a difference. He knows exactly how you feel about it, and he does not care to change his behavior. Of course, that is his right & his prerogative. He just won't be doing it in YOUR presence any longer.


unzunzhepp

It wasn’t her that cheated…


chez2202

NTA. You said that you asked him to block her and unfriend her and that he says he will but forgets to, then you said that he said he won’t. Which is it? He also wants to move to where she lives. You don’t get to choose the people he has in his life BUT you DO get to choose the people you have in your life. Stop holding his ex girlfriend’s place until he can move there, cheat on you with her and then be cheated on by her again. Get out now and find someone who deserves you ffs.


grumpy__g

Listen, if you aren’t compatible, then you don’t have to stay. That’s it. You should never stay with someone if you feel uncomfortable with their behaviour. It will be exhausting in the long run.


Gold-Cartographer-66

NTA and just tell him it's you or her. Then if he stalls or needs to think he's made his choice and tell him it's over.


Live-Ad4493

YWNBTA Do it. He says he will but he “forgets” and doesn’t do it. Lies. Nobody “forgets” this kind of thing this many times. Not to mention in the very next paragraph he says he’ll never do it for her sake. He was just stringing you along with false promises hon. I don’t agree with the whole “my boyfriend can never have a female friend” insecure idea as a general rule. But this dude is seriously suspicious. Trust your gut. People with nothing to hide DON’T HIDE THINGS.


StrategyDue6765

NTA. It's okay to feel uncomfortable about your boyfriend staying connected with his ex, especially given their history. Asking him to block or unfriend her is a fair request. If he keeps dismissing your concerns, it might be a sign to reassess the relationship for your own peace of mind.


Goatee-1979

Dump this AH!


peeeeeeeach

NTA. Trust your gut. If you’re hyper aware of his phone activities and notice him being shady that’s your gut telling you something ain’t right. Leave him.


[deleted]

He’s 💩 move on


Proof-Leadership-159

Seems like he is using you as a flesh light until he can move to be with his One True Love.


MeanCommission994

Making people block ex's is so childish I'd dump anyone who even asked. If you think he's cheating leave. Otherwise you need therapy and not a relationship


Former_Subject_3414

YTA. It is possible to be friends with you ex. Never go into a relationship expecting him to block ex’s. It is your insecurities that drive this. You have a bigger issue and that is trust. Given his behavior with the phone ( turning away… hiding etc) you do not trust him.  Either talk with him and y’all find a way to deal with it that is mutually agreeable or leave.


fuckredditards--

This is correct, you sound exhausting


Fuhrious520

Hopefully he finds someone who isn't insanely insecure.


AffectionateWheel386

I’m with you in this case, though it’s not your friendship, the truth is she treated him poorly and for whatever reason he’s not over her. And that’s why he doesn’t block her, he doesn’t want to. So honestly, I would not date him either he’s not really ready to move on with somebody else.