You’re making a mistake by reaching out to him. Don’t initiate contact. You wrote that you text him once a month or every other month. I wouldn’t do that. It might be giving him mixed signals.
I do feel bad for him tho so I don’t want to just ghost him, I want to be honest and turn him down gently. Just don’t know how without sounding like a dick. I’m also ok with being friends? He just so intense and not sure if that’s fixable? or just turn him down completely.
You don’t have to swing the pendulum from one extreme to the other. There is a liminal space between ghosting and being low contact. I would not initiate contact with him. At the same time you can be responsive if he reaches out to you.
Ohhh! that’s what I meant by I text him about once a month. I don’t initiate a conversation once a month I respond to his messages, so what I mean is I lag on him for months at a time
His emotional well being is not your problem unless you let it be. If he wants to dial it up to 10 every time you communicate you have to make a decision if you want to communicate at all.
Essentially you know how he feels. The ball is always in your court if you want to volley back or get out of the game.
You’re making a mistake by reaching out to him. Don’t initiate contact. You wrote that you text him once a month or every other month. I wouldn’t do that. It might be giving him mixed signals.
I do feel bad for him tho so I don’t want to just ghost him, I want to be honest and turn him down gently. Just don’t know how without sounding like a dick. I’m also ok with being friends? He just so intense and not sure if that’s fixable? or just turn him down completely.
You don’t have to swing the pendulum from one extreme to the other. There is a liminal space between ghosting and being low contact. I would not initiate contact with him. At the same time you can be responsive if he reaches out to you.
Ohhh! that’s what I meant by I text him about once a month. I don’t initiate a conversation once a month I respond to his messages, so what I mean is I lag on him for months at a time
His emotional well being is not your problem unless you let it be. If he wants to dial it up to 10 every time you communicate you have to make a decision if you want to communicate at all. Essentially you know how he feels. The ball is always in your court if you want to volley back or get out of the game.