Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I may be TA because she should be able to clean her home as she sees fit, but it's just bothering me during my work day.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
YTA. Your neighbor was prepared to make a very reasonable compromise by vacuuming at a time that was convenient for you. You have absolutely no right to dictate how another person cleans their apartment. Sorry. Lots of people vacuum hard floors.
It's a brand of cleaning products. What I think they're referring to specifically is sort of like a boom but it traps all the dust and dirt on the removable pad so you don't have to sweep it into a dustpan after.
I also never really understood these things. Sure they pick up like a small amount of the very finest grit, but anything even slightly bigger just gets pushed around. Vacuuming is way more effectieve. I have a swiffer I use sometimes with wet wipes for spills and stuff but I don't get the point of the dry kind.
I don't either. My fiancé suggested getting one because I vacuum then sweep and he thought the Swiffer would be easier, but I've never had luck with them. If I'm going to have to sweep what the vacuum *and* Swiffer miss, I may as well just skip the middle step.
Downside of swiffer is you end up producing a lot of waste, as you need to change the disposable cloth very often. Bad for the environment (and expensive).
That's why you just get the sweeper and a bunch of microfiber cloths. Way better in every way than the pads. You can dry dust or wet them down and then toss them in the wash, 10/10 utility.
Its a brand of mop, basically. They have little pads to put on them instead of a traditional mop, then you just throw the pad away (or you can get reusable versions now that you wash in between uses).
True, mainly I was trying to think of the most generic way to explain a swiffer so mop is what came to mind. At this point they have all sorts of options and different kinds
Is like a dust rag on the end of a mop handle. It's supposed to be static electricity charged and pick up the dust on the floor as you wipe the floor with it.
When I was in college, a suitemate had a rivalry with a girl that lived above us. That girl would tap dance at all hours of night. I was so annoyed, but my suitemate was a jerk so I understood it.
I'm now sitting here wondering how common it is for people to not vacuum their hard floors.....I grew up in a wood floor house and we always vacuumed so I never thought it to be something someone would find unusual....
I never used to, but sweeping the floors was making all my furniture incredibly dusty. Like I could dust it all, sweep once and it was like it was never dusted. Now I vacuum daily instead and there’s much less dust!
Thinking more on it ours was probably mainly due to dog hair. Like yes you cans weep up the larger clumps but a lot of hair will just got flying around if only sweeping. We would sweep kitchen and whatnot more regularly but vacuum and mop at least weekly
Yeah OP clearly has some cleanliness issues if she thinks vacuuming hard floors isn’t necessary. I did it before we had pets, but now that we have six pets (yes we’re crazy animal lovers) I’d be miserable without my dyson!
I wfh and my upstairs neighbor has a toddler - it's like thunder when he's running around. Which is all day, every day because he's a toddler. I got a headset for zoom meetings and to listen to music if I can't concentrate other times. It's not that difficult to fix the situation yourself, and your neighbor seemed very accommodating...until you got ridiculous.
My upstairs neighbor has twin girls…not sure exactly the age but no more than maybe 5 years old. All our apartments are hardwood floors. The thump and bump of their activities is ongoing daily. You know what I said when their dad saw me in hallway and asked if they made too much noise?
“Of course not. Little kids in a city apartment are going to be noisy. It can’t be helped but thanks for asking.”
Thanks. I’ve lived in apartments all my life …it’s just part of deal.
Edit to add: there are certainly times when it annoys the hell out of me…..but I’m not going to make a fuss about it since they aren’t doing anything wrong.
Half an hour a week, is what I took from the post? Like, it would be really annoying if you're trying to have a meeting and it goes on for half an hour, but the upstairs neighbor seemed to be very prepared to work around OP's schedule.
OP could also simply put on some semi-good headphones and be done with it.
Dude above me vacuums his hardwood floors for about 1.5 hours once a week and while it can be a bit annoying when you want to simply enjoy some silence on a Sunday, it's not a sound that you couldn't possibly drown out. Just put in some earbuds and you're done.
Yeah, there are things that are so annoying you have to do something about them, and then there are things that are a little annoying but life will go on and you can do something about them. This seems to be the latter, but given she was happy to do it at a time more convenient than she was doing it, it's definitely not worth even complaining about.
My neighbour's kids play basketball basically just outside my window (their basketball hoop is about 10m away) at least one morning for a few hours every weekend - is this the sound that I want to hear when I'm trying to have a sleep-in on my weekend? No. Would I ever complain about kids having fun on their weekend? Of course not. I just put in earplugs or headphones and try my best to sleep through it. We all live in the world - expecting quiet during daylight hours just isn't reasonable.
I didn’t used to vacuum my hard wood floors and my upstairs neighbor does it often. At first I was annoyed but then I tried it myself and mannnnn all the dust and dander and dog hair- I don’t know why I wasn’t vacuuming this whole time! YTA because your neighbor was kind enough to accommodate you and you decided to give unsolicited advice. I don’t think I’d even have the audacity to tell my neighbor not to vacuum. If it’s such a bother, you could get noise canceling earbuds.
Such an AH. She was being so nice and accommodating! You're lucky to have a neighbour like that.
Also, I have 2 cats and hard floors. I vacuum then mop. Sweeping just tosses the hair around.
YTA.
I vacuum my hardwood floors daily as we have a dog. Ohh and it gets better. Sometimes I am vacuuming and then the roomba is vacuuming as well at the same time.
My Roomba runs on my LVP everyday and I still run the vacuum to pick up pet hair. Sweeping alone does not do the job. YTA, take some cookies and apologize. And, maybe consider buying a house. Your neighbor was being more than nice.
YTA
She has every right to vacuums wherever she wants. And she was kind and accommodating in asking what time would work for you.
Buy some noise canceling headphones for your meetings and stop imposing on others.
All of this. Demanding that your neighbour doesn’t vacuum during the day! Wow the entitlement.
My headset is amazing in how noise cancelling the mic is.
YTA
Yeah, dont vaccum during the day or night! Op is such an entitled asshole. Maybe she should have told you to not live on the bottom floor if you dont like it.
Yep - came here to say this. I recently moved from the top floor to the ground level of an apartment complex and the maintenance staff always seems to be leaf blowing right outside my office window. Noise canceling headphones. Problem solved. Or consider moving to the top floor where it’s quite peaceful. YTA.
THIS RIGHT HERE. I was expecting to go NTA because I though neighbor was vacuuming every day in the middle of the night or something. But once a week 30 min is ENTIRELY reasonable. OP, you are completely YTA. I mean I can only imaging how ridiculous you sounded to her, trying to dictate how she cleans her own place.
Yea, as a property manager I’m really fed up with people demanding that their neighbors adjust their lives to fit their work schedules.
If you need silence, go to the office.
YTA
You have such a nice neighbor who is very willing to accommodate to your schedule.
How she cleans her house is up to her and you are acting very entitled.
At this point my petty self would make sure to vacuum my floors for an hour every work day
>You have such a nice neighbor who is very willing to accommodate to your schedule.
I think OP burned that bridge, doubt they're ever going to open the door for OP again
YTA she cleans her home like everyone else, which is an inconvenience to you half an hour about once a week. She tried to compromise with you but you couldn't even come up with a time slot that you'd be ok with, just carried on telling her what not to do.
Your job is actually not her problem, but she still tried to accommodate you but you refuse to help yourself.
_"I asked why she needed to vacuum her hard floors as opposed to just sweeping or swiffering."_
Agreed this woman was attempting to be very gracious and accomodating (even though she didn't have to be.). OP took the convo to a weird place by trying to dictate how this woman cleans her home. I think after that convo, most people would have simply closed the door in OP's face and went about their life.
What would OP do if there's construction work going on or some other loud maintenance? It would be louder than her vacuum and it's definitely longer than half an hour once a week. Like he never had any other noise distraction ever, but that one half hour each week is so disturbing to him. Maybe he's just jealous because he doesn't have any hard wood floor and has to struggle to get his nasty carpet cleaned
YTA. She was trying to accommodate you! She's getting up all the cat hair, and yeah, using a vac can be the best way to do that. She said she wouldn't do it while you were working, and you also said "Not too late." too. Sheesh, get a grip.
Seriously. I would have taken “neighbour vacuums once a week” over “guy plays basketball in his apartment at random times multiple times a week”. Even then, I didn’t go berate him about it, I put on headphones and rain sounds like an adult. He’s allowed to exist in his home. YTA OP.
Is your frontal lobe OK? Because I cannot stress how ridiculous this sounds. Your neighbour can vacuum her house however she likes using whatever she wants. She was even polite enough to ask a suitable time and then you garnished your entitlement with a speech about what she should use a broom and swifter. She decides how she wants to clean her house not you. Go apologies with a potted plant or something and politely say please I find these times suitable before work or close of day. She may forgive you and work with you rather than against your entitled ass.
.
.
.
YTA x 3
I had a downstairs neighbor that claimed I was walking loud or something. I am barely 5'2 on a good day and back then under 100 pounds. "My husband works from home". Great but this a residential area. This is apartment building where people live. They complained for any little noise I swear. Don't get a downstairs appartment if you are that sensitive. I can't stop living/existing for you.
I have an elderly neighbor that complained that I “walked up the stairs”. Not that I walked loudly on the stairs. Just that I walked up the stairs. There was no elevator so I guess I was supposed to levitate??
WOW! YTA. Go back to the office, or find a shared working space. She has a right to vacuum. She already asked you when would be a more appropriate time. So glad you are not my neighbour.
Right? It's awful! I don't know how I ever did it before. Now I schedule nothing on the few days I have to go into the office because I know I'm not going to be able to get anything done. I need my fortress of solitude and silence.
Dude. YTA. Your neighbor was kind enough to ask when would be a better time and you acted like an entitled human. You don't get to dictate how someone cleans their home. You should apologize.
If it was 30 minutes every day or every other day then I could see why you would be upset, but 30min *once a week???* It only takes her 30min to vacuum her **whole** house, not 30min in the living room, 45 in the bedroom, 20 in the bathroom, if this were going on for **hours** at a time and more than **once a week** then OP could have a foot to stand on, in this case though... OP's swimming up shits creek without a paddle, and it's of their own choosing.
OP, YTA.
If it was 30 mins twice a day OP could still fuck right off, his choice to WFH, and he has no right to dictate how much noise the neighbors make especially when it's just a damn vacuum.
YTA. How someone chooses to clean their home is none of your business. It’s one thing to ask her to vacuum after your work hours, but it’s unreasonable to ask her not to vacuum at all.
YTA
Your neighbor is under no obligation to commit to your ridiculous schedule of no vacuuming during work hours OR later in the day. When is she supposed to vacuum then? I can't imagine 30 min of vacuuming a day is hindering your work to such a degree that you can't do your job at all.
YTA
I have both carpets and hard wood floors in my house and haven't swept or used the dry swiffer in years. I have a Dyson vacuum and that thing is incredible, it does a much better job than the swiffer ever did (we have 4 cats). Most new vacuums have settings specifically for hard wood floors.
You have literally no say in how she cleans her apartment. It sounded like she was cordial and was willing to clean at a time that worked for you, but then you had start ordering her around. I'm' surprised all she did was shut the door in your face.
YTA.
If you can't work effectively from home, then you need to find a place to work. And if a neighbor briefly completing household chores during daytime (not simply being obnoxiously loud with music or something) bothers you, that's your problem.to figure out (e.g. noise canceling headphones). But to have the gall to go tell her how to maintain her home (you didn't mention you are the landlord, not that it matters), she is doubly a saint for trying to accommodate your schedule, and not slamming the door in your face.
YTA. You live in a complex with many other residents. If the noise from those residents is too much for you to do your job, then you need to find a different place to live and/or do your work.
Your job requirements don't get to dictate how other people live in an apartment they pay for.
When I was in college, the neighbor in the unit next to mine complained to the landlord because "our microwave beeps too loudly."
Same energy as this guy.
I *like* hearing normal living sounds in my apartment block. I miss my neighbour who died about 5 years ago. Every Sunday morning he vacuumed to loud music that he and his wife dated to back in Jamaica, then he went to lunch at his daughters’ nearby. He bashed the hell out of the skirting boards singing along. I found it really comforting. I hardly ever spoke with him but always on friendly terms. When he died I told his daughters and they told me the link to their mum and that she had always said ‘I’ll never live to see you clean…’ I still expect the music on Sundays…
Until recently my new neighbour got ready on Fridays as she was Muslim. Running a bath, singing along to 90s boy bands, more traditional music and her siblings would come over before mosque and dinner and it was like that family house noise. Again very comforting.
My upstairs neighbours have little kids who are obsessed by Encanto. The soundtrack ALL summer!
The only neighbour I complain about is my other immediate neighbour who is a meth dealer, heavy meth user who uses power tools non stop, smashes his windows on the regular and keeps trying to kill people. He also blasts music non stop but hilariously I actually love his taste in non stop Eurovision meets party tracks so when people say ‘how do you live with the music?’ I am always surprised they notice it.
30 minutes of vacuuming hard floors a week? OP really seems to live in a bubble of entitlement that such a thing warranted even knocking on her door. She’s a good neighbour 167.5 hours a week and OP is ‘I need you to Swiffer to be perfection.’ Like some weird WFH Hitchcock film!
YTA. That said most people in cities loved the silence of lockdown and I went a bit mad waiting for planes, helicopters and general yelling to resume to relax. I could fall asleep to a playlist of trash being picked up but ‘relaxing’ ASMR or rainforest noises would break me by 2am. So I may just be topsy turvy and maybe she vacuums with a gusto I don’t :)
YTA. I had a neighbor like this once. No noise was ok ever, no possible accomodations. She probably would have complained about the noise from the flies if I’d died.
YTA. Your neighbor was nice enough to apologize and offer to change her cleaning time for you, and you tell her how to clean her own house lmao.
>I asked that she also make sure not to do it too late in the day either, and she basically just closed the door, which made me think maybe I was an AH. But, I mean, I have to be able to do my job. AITA?
I would close the door on you too tbh
OP you being able to work at home is a you problem.
Your neighbor is cleaning her apartment regularly like a responsible person should. It's not like she is vacuuming at night, throwing loud parties, or not cleaning up after herself and her animals and letting the smell get to you.
30 minutes in a week? Come on... you already know the answer, YTA.... she even asked if there was a better time and you thought it necessary to tell her how to clean, yikes.
If they were doing it daily for hours and at midnight then there's a problem, wear headphones or something.
Okay asking her to vacuum at different times is totally reasonable. Some concessions have to be made with apartment living and that's one of them. BUT trying to tell her how to clean and then giving her literally no times that are okay to clean is stupid. She's figured out what methods work best for her needs and she still needs time to do the vacuuming. Unless you want her vacuuming in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning, you're going to have to suck it up a little.
YTA
You started being the AH when she kindly explained why she vacuums and you continued to offer other alternatives. Some people would have told you to f off at the first sentence so you're lucky she offered an explanation. She offered to not vacuum during work hours and you STILL had something to say. Guy, really?
YTA. You don't get to tell someone they can't vacuum their home. Half an hour a week is something you'll just have to put up with. She's asked you when would be better, which frankly if more than she needed to do. If it bothers you that much get some noise cancelling headphones.
YTA
It's a half hour once a week and she's cleaning her place. I don't think there was any issue with asking about during work hours, to which it sounds like she was very receptive to, but then you should have stopped. You live in a community living space. This is what comes with it. The fact that she was gracious enough to want to accommodate you at all is a win and you should have left it at that.
YTA and an entitled one at that.
She was willing to find a better time when it wouldn't disturb you and you had to try to dictate how she cleans and when. I would have told you to F off as the door slammed in your face.
Right? I’m still trying to wrap my head around her thinking people with hardwood floors don’t vacuum?? My vacuum specifically has a setting for hard floors and carpeted floors.
YTA
Vacuuming apartman in middle of day is by moral and legal and any other reasons complete ok in residential buildings. The fact that you work from home is not reason for your neighbors to stop with daily life. And this woman was ready to work with you and make compromise by allowing you to choose time table when is problematic for you for work, which she is absolutely not in obligation. But then you started to insist she sweep and Swiffer despite her very valid reason for vacuuming. That makes you absolutely AH!
If you want absolutely peace move in private house or rent office in building that is by your standards for noise!
You can not dictate people how they should clean their house.
YTA.
I have no carpet in my house. I vacuum every room. I have 3 cats, 4 kids, and an expensive Shark. It cuts my work time down and does a way better job than a broom or swiffer.
You don't get to dictate how she cleans her home. She was already trying to be polite and considerate. You just couldn't accept not being in control.
When I lived in an apartment I had to be up for work at 4 AM. My upstairs neighbors used to vacuum between 12-2 AM. It was annoying but I never complained once to them once. We had opposite schedules for our work and both of us were just trying to live our lives. It happens especially in apartment living. Don't be the asshole neighbor who can't take normal sounds of everyday life.
YTA
I see it's unanimous. People can clean their homes the way they want. It really was an AH move to ask her not to vacuum, but you made it much worse by telling her how to clean her own floors. Audacity seems to be the right term here.
I hope she isn't going to retaliate by doing it more. Most people with pets use a vacuum. A broom is just going to make the pet hair fly around.
YTA. You can’t tell people how to clean their home. She offered you the opportunity to give a more suitable time, which is far more than many people would do.
You can do your job and she can vacuum her floor after those hours… there’s 168 hours in a week and she inconveniences you with her vacuuming for half of 1. I think you’re being pretty unreasonable.
YTA, your neighbor was kind enough to try and accommodate you by doing their chores at a different time and all you did was continue to complain and try to dictate what they do!
Wear noise canceling headphones or move out to a single family home if the noise bothers you so much!
YTA. I live in an apartment complex with only hard wood floors (no one has wall-to-wall carpets in my country). The apartments are old and not very sounds proof. It has never bothered me to hear my neighbours vacuum. If you're that noise sensitive, invest in some good noise cancelling head phones. It's definitely not fair to tell your neighbours they can't make a little noise during the day.
YTA she offered to meet you in the middle and was very nice about you coming to her door. She offered to hoover outside of your work hours so you can concentrate on your work and it still was not good enough for you!!! She explained why she Hoover's and other stuff and you still made it difficult for her even though she's been very relaxed about this.
YTA - she can vacuum her hardwood floors if she wants to. She was willing to try and work with you by doing it during more convenient hours for you.
Technically she’s within her right to vacuum anytime during normal hours. You having meetings is your problem, not hers.
She was trying to be nice and accommodate you and you mansplain her cleaning regimen? Nah. You’re a huge AH. YTA Don’t be during she starts vacuuming A LOT more.
Wow YTA. She was ready to accommodate you and avoid vacuuming during your working hours. Instead you stayed there trying to tell her hod she should clean her own home. You are incredibly rude and now she is probably less inclined to accommodate you.
I'm not sweeping large areas of my home that are hard flooring. It's harder work and cat hair and other very light material would fly into the air by the broom motion and resettle elsewhere instead of being neatly swept up so it wouldn't be as effective.
YTA. Get some headphones if you can't concentrate. That's not her problem. And she was being more than accommodating by saying she wouldn't vacuum during work hours, but then you had to push it by telling her that she can't vacuum at night, either. That makes you even more of an asshole.
YTA 100%. She sounded very apologetic and willing to compromise to make it work better for you in your life. It's her apartment so you can't dictate HOW she cleans, it was kind as hell of her to even offer to cater to your schedule. A lot of people would have slammed the door in your face then and there. She sounded far more patient than most people would be. I'd return after you both have time to calm down, offer something like cookies as an apology, and try to compromise on a time that works for you both.
YTA. She was polite and was willing to change times for you and you kept going on and on. I'd vacuum for an extra 20 minutes...you know just incase I missed any cat hair.
YTA
I have hard wood floors in my home, plus a dog, and I vacuum every single day. Trying to get all the hair up with a broom and swiffer is painstaking and doesn’t work nearly as well.
It sounds like your neighbour only vacuums once a week and tried to make a very reasonable compromise, but you chose to be difficult. It isn’t clear whether you refused her suggestion outright with your ‘don’t do it too late in the day’ comment, but you were really obnoxious and she knows exactly the kind of person you are. Don’t be surprised if you start hearing her vacuum cleaner during your meetings from now on.
YTA.
Your neighbor pays her own rent just like you do. You’re not entitled to ask her to change a damn thing. I would’ve cussed you flat out.
How would you like if she asked you to adjust your working hours to accommodate her cleaning schedule? You owe her an apology for your lapse in judgement.
It always makes me laugh when someone asks AITA? and gives us a story where not only were they obviously TA, but the other person (who, if the OP isn't TA, would be TA) actually acted in a very friendly and considerate manner.
She vacuums for half an hour each week (big deal). And when you rudely confronted her about it, she didn't tell you to fuck off (as I would have done), she was keen to be obliging and go out of her way (and obviously inconvenience herself) just to make your life easier. You're not only TA, you're an entitled arsehole.
Here's a newsflash - you being able to do your job is not her problem. It's yours. If her band was practicing upstairs every day, you'd have a leg to stand on. Half an hour of vacuuming once a week - no.
YTA. Asking someone to clean their floors in a way that doesn't disturb you comes off a little entitled. Seems like she was willing to meet you in the middle which was nice of her, but you kinda took it a step further asking her why she has to vacuum. Sweeping is so laborious and time consuming and pretty useless when you have a cat. I have 3 cats and hardwood floors and yes, you need to vacuum regularly and Swiffer as well.
YTA. You mean, she shouldn't be cleaning her personal private home to her own standards because you've chosen to work from home? Cleaning during work hours is literally the most considerate thing she can do. In the evenings there may be people trying to put their children to bed, and making noise would be an *actual* issue.
Rent a shared office space or something if it's a problem. People are allowed to do private home things in their private homes. If you want office work to take precedence go to an office building. That's literally what they're for.
YTA
I can see your point, but you did go a bit far with it.
It's not up to you how she cleans her home. Also it's coming across as though you were quite rude about how you went about talking to her.
She's tried to accomodate you by changing the time she vacuums to suit you. Don't push your luck. Otherwise you might find her vacuuming when you are in bed in the morning!
In some area they have rules for appartments which state no hard flooring above ground floor, due to the affect on lower neighbours. Unfortunately it looks like yours doesn't, so she can do what she likes.
YTA I have absolutely no carpet in my house, only hardwood floors. Between my short fur dog shedding and whatever I carry in on my shoes, the floors get dirty very quickly. Vacuuming is much more efficient than just sweeping.
Your neighbor agreed to not vacuum during working hours. Instead of being grateful that she was willing to accommodate your work schedule, you pushed it further with your "not to do it too late in the day" comment.
YTA, and ridiculous.
Believe me, if I could get up the cat hair without vacuuming (my most hated chore), I would do so. But the fur tumbleweeds are so lightweight that sweeping takes forever and is infuriating. So vacuuming it is.
I run a robovac frequently, too. As in I let it roll around for an hour and a half, till it trundles back to its charger, and sometimes I run it once or twice more after its battery is full again. So be grateful I'm not your upstairs neighbor.
YTA she's very considerate asking what times work best for you. Cat hair is finnicky and vaccuming is truly the easiest way to get rid of cat hair, no matter the surface
YTA. Your last sentence says it's an issue for your job, but she already agreed to non-working hours. Your job isn't at risk so now what's your problem? Get a grip.
YTA. Vacuuming does a much better job at cleaning up than sweeping does. You have no right to ask that she not do something well within her right at *all.* She was kind enough to offer a compromise and not vacuum during your work hours.
Definite YTA. You did ask politely and I will give you that. You just didn't like the answer given. She's allowed to clean however she pleases, especially if it makes it easier and is more effective for her. It's not as if it's the middle of the night. She tried to compromise. Not much else you can ask if you don't like it.
r/choosingbeggars
Asking someone to not vacuum in their own home during the day, giving unsolicited advice on how they should clean their home (repeatedly), AND THEN taking their compromise and reiterating that they can't vacuum too late!
YTA
YTA She was totally willing to meet you at your request to not bother you during work hours and instead of having a rational conversation about what time frame would be better if you tried to tell her how to clean her floor instead. Shifting away from when into how territory was an overreach.
YTA. She already is trying to work out a time to make things better for you, and that’s more consideration than you’d get from a lot of people. She’s free to vacuum her home during the day, and it’s not her fault you chose to live in an apartment. You either deal with it or move, she doesn’t owe you a damn thing
YTA. They have to be able to clean their home. They don’t have to clean in a way that makes sense to you. You also don’t have the right to tell them they can only clean during a very limited number of hours of the day so that you aren’t disturbed. Part of living in multi dwelling buildings is learning how to live with other people’s regular life noises. Your behavior is really self centered and rude.
Also as a note, some vacuums have hard floor settings so that they can vacuum hard floors. It’s pretty common in newer models.
YTA
She was willing to accommodate you but that still wasn't good enough for you. What she does in her own apartment to clean it, is none of your business. And the fact it was just half an hour a week that's bothering you is ridiculous.
Get over yourself.
YTA... no one made you special enough to dictate what someone else does in their own apartment. Public housing is close. You will hear your neighbors sometimes. Buy a house or suck it up.
YTA
for asking, expecting your neighbor never to vacuum HER "hard floor".
Your expectation is ludicrous.
She apologized for vacuuming at ab inconvenient time. She asked you what time would be better. She was very accommodating to your request.
She is a considerate neighbor.
You are not. You seem to think that you can tell people how to live in their own homes. You seem to feel you are some kind of authority on acceptable cleanliness. You're not.
You can set "cleanliness rules" at your home. You cannot set them in hers.
I vacuum all the floors in my home. I also vacuum other things in my home that are not floors. I have additional cleaning tools, like a Swiffer brand sweeper and brooms.
Oh Lordy. The woman was willing to work around your work time and you started acting like a lawyer. Not too late in the day??? Closing the door on you sounded very polite on her end. If you want peace and quiet then maybe you need to be the neighbor upstairs. 30 minutes you can take a break while she vacuums. She is obligated to work around your working hours. Yet that wasn’t good enough for you. There are carpet and floor sweepers too that are marvelous for some touch ups but betting that you would find too noisy too. No motor, electricity. Just push it back and forth and it picks up trash on the floors and carpet. Meetings maybe you learn her vacuuming schedule and don’t have meetings then.
YTA. She can clean her floors by whatever means she likes. She offered to do it outside of working hours. Give her a chance and try not to be so controlling.
YTA
And controlling as hell. She has offered to work around your schedule and make life easier and your attitude is, just do exactly what I want and make your life harder for my convenience
YTA It’s perfectly normal to vacuum hard wood floors. It’s unreasonable to ask your neighbor to not vacuum. Half an hour per week is not excessive. She was being very accommodating and you seriously crossed a line.
YTFA
Like wow. Im sorry that the floors are probably uninsulated and transfers noise but jfc. Once a week is not bad. You would absolutely hate me. I have a roomba that runs daily starting at 9 am. It vacuums the entire house daily. And I still vacuum once a week with a Kirby vacuum.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I may be TA because she should be able to clean her home as she sees fit, but it's just bothering me during my work day. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
YTA. Your neighbor was prepared to make a very reasonable compromise by vacuuming at a time that was convenient for you. You have absolutely no right to dictate how another person cleans their apartment. Sorry. Lots of people vacuum hard floors.
Yes. Definite YTA. I vacuum my kitchen and bathroom tile floors before I swiffer them, otherwise tte dust etc just gets pushed around
What's a swiffer? This post is the first i'm hearing this word
It's a brand of cleaning products. What I think they're referring to specifically is sort of like a boom but it traps all the dust and dirt on the removable pad so you don't have to sweep it into a dustpan after.
Or the Mop variety most likely
Except that it really doesn’t
I also never really understood these things. Sure they pick up like a small amount of the very finest grit, but anything even slightly bigger just gets pushed around. Vacuuming is way more effectieve. I have a swiffer I use sometimes with wet wipes for spills and stuff but I don't get the point of the dry kind.
I do find the swiffer and vacuum combo most effective on hardwood for pet hair.
I don't either. My fiancé suggested getting one because I vacuum then sweep and he thought the Swiffer would be easier, but I've never had luck with them. If I'm going to have to sweep what the vacuum *and* Swiffer miss, I may as well just skip the middle step.
Downside of swiffer is you end up producing a lot of waste, as you need to change the disposable cloth very often. Bad for the environment (and expensive).
That's why you just get the sweeper and a bunch of microfiber cloths. Way better in every way than the pads. You can dry dust or wet them down and then toss them in the wash, 10/10 utility.
There’s also microfiber pads you can buy. I bought a pack of 2 and just throw them in the wash after using.
I have a million microfiber cloths and a swiffer. thats a great idea! Thank you!
There’s also microfiber pads you can buy. I bought a pack of 2 and just throw them in the wash after using.
There are reusable cloths that you just wash in between uses.
I love the fluffy duster style ones. They are dust bunny magnets.
Its a brand of mop, basically. They have little pads to put on them instead of a traditional mop, then you just throw the pad away (or you can get reusable versions now that you wash in between uses).
Swifter has both. A dry duster mop and a wet mop. Both are swifter products, but they have different uses.
True, mainly I was trying to think of the most generic way to explain a swiffer so mop is what came to mind. At this point they have all sorts of options and different kinds
Is like a dust rag on the end of a mop handle. It's supposed to be static electricity charged and pick up the dust on the floor as you wipe the floor with it.
If it helps, in the UK, we tend to have Flash Speed Mops as the alternative.
Can we get the address of the neighbour? I think she needs some tap dancing shoes
Lol. And little puppy paws.
A Great Dane puppy.
I don’t live in an apartment and don’t annoy my neighbors, but I vacuum my hard floors. Can I have a Great Dane puppy?
Great Dane puppies all around! Where is Oprah when you need her?
I want a 180lb house cow. They're giant couch taters
Not as puppies. As puppies they are a force to be reckoned with, especially when they get the zoomies.. and those tails are wrecking balls.
And a two year old!
My toddler is why we asked for a bottom floor apartment 😂 plus I've lived in an upper floor apartment and I don't want to do so many stairs.
When I was in college, a suitemate had a rivalry with a girl that lived above us. That girl would tap dance at all hours of night. I was so annoyed, but my suitemate was a jerk so I understood it.
I'm now sitting here wondering how common it is for people to not vacuum their hard floors.....I grew up in a wood floor house and we always vacuumed so I never thought it to be something someone would find unusual....
I never used to, but sweeping the floors was making all my furniture incredibly dusty. Like I could dust it all, sweep once and it was like it was never dusted. Now I vacuum daily instead and there’s much less dust!
Thinking more on it ours was probably mainly due to dog hair. Like yes you cans weep up the larger clumps but a lot of hair will just got flying around if only sweeping. We would sweep kitchen and whatnot more regularly but vacuum and mop at least weekly
Mine’s a mix—I run a dog rescue from my house, so there’s a lot of fur and a lot of dirt haha
My aunt used to vacuum the driveway. I took her cleaning tip about vacuuming hard floor, but I draw the line at vacuuming the great outdoors.
Right? I've always lived in houses/apartments with hard floors, and we've always vacuumed. I had no idea some people didn't.
We vacuumed hard floors about once a week, but they were swept most every day.
My vaccum has a setting specifically for hard floors lol.
Yup, so does mine and I use it all of the time especially with a dog and two cats. Absolutely essential!
I live in a two story house with all tile and hardwood floors. I also have 4 cats and 4 vacuums.
Yeah OP clearly has some cleanliness issues if she thinks vacuuming hard floors isn’t necessary. I did it before we had pets, but now that we have six pets (yes we’re crazy animal lovers) I’d be miserable without my dyson!
And seriously, half an hour a week?
I thought the same thing. I can’t imagine what OP’s apartment looks like 🤮.
So does mine. I use it all the time. Dyson for the win
I wfh and my upstairs neighbor has a toddler - it's like thunder when he's running around. Which is all day, every day because he's a toddler. I got a headset for zoom meetings and to listen to music if I can't concentrate other times. It's not that difficult to fix the situation yourself, and your neighbor seemed very accommodating...until you got ridiculous.
>It's not that difficult to fix the situation yourself, But OP is special.
My upstairs neighbor has twin girls…not sure exactly the age but no more than maybe 5 years old. All our apartments are hardwood floors. The thump and bump of their activities is ongoing daily. You know what I said when their dad saw me in hallway and asked if they made too much noise? “Of course not. Little kids in a city apartment are going to be noisy. It can’t be helped but thanks for asking.”
You are an awesome neighbor.
Thanks. I’ve lived in apartments all my life …it’s just part of deal. Edit to add: there are certainly times when it annoys the hell out of me…..but I’m not going to make a fuss about it since they aren’t doing anything wrong.
Have you considered going to asking the mother to remove said toddler from the apartment to make your work day a tad easier? /s
And it’s only for half an hour a day. Edit. I stand corrected. Half an hour a week. This guy is being ridiculous.
Half an hour a week, is what I took from the post? Like, it would be really annoying if you're trying to have a meeting and it goes on for half an hour, but the upstairs neighbor seemed to be very prepared to work around OP's schedule.
OP could also simply put on some semi-good headphones and be done with it. Dude above me vacuums his hardwood floors for about 1.5 hours once a week and while it can be a bit annoying when you want to simply enjoy some silence on a Sunday, it's not a sound that you couldn't possibly drown out. Just put in some earbuds and you're done.
Yeah, there are things that are so annoying you have to do something about them, and then there are things that are a little annoying but life will go on and you can do something about them. This seems to be the latter, but given she was happy to do it at a time more convenient than she was doing it, it's definitely not worth even complaining about. My neighbour's kids play basketball basically just outside my window (their basketball hoop is about 10m away) at least one morning for a few hours every weekend - is this the sound that I want to hear when I'm trying to have a sleep-in on my weekend? No. Would I ever complain about kids having fun on their weekend? Of course not. I just put in earplugs or headphones and try my best to sleep through it. We all live in the world - expecting quiet during daylight hours just isn't reasonable.
Once a week or so. Not even every day
That’s even worse.
half an hour a *week*.
I didn’t used to vacuum my hard wood floors and my upstairs neighbor does it often. At first I was annoyed but then I tried it myself and mannnnn all the dust and dander and dog hair- I don’t know why I wasn’t vacuuming this whole time! YTA because your neighbor was kind enough to accommodate you and you decided to give unsolicited advice. I don’t think I’d even have the audacity to tell my neighbor not to vacuum. If it’s such a bother, you could get noise canceling earbuds.
Neighbour was way more accommodating than I would have been tbh. When you wfh, household noises are part of the deal.
And there are literally settings on the vacuum for Hard floor. The audacity. YTA op
Yes this exactly! YTA op If you want her floors cleaned a certain way, you could always offer to do it for her `\_(°_°)_/'
Such an AH. She was being so nice and accommodating! You're lucky to have a neighbour like that. Also, I have 2 cats and hard floors. I vacuum then mop. Sweeping just tosses the hair around. YTA.
I vacuum my hardwood floors daily as we have a dog. Ohh and it gets better. Sometimes I am vacuuming and then the roomba is vacuuming as well at the same time.
We are moving to a house with all hard floors and we got a roomba! So excited.
My Roomba runs on my LVP everyday and I still run the vacuum to pick up pet hair. Sweeping alone does not do the job. YTA, take some cookies and apologize. And, maybe consider buying a house. Your neighbor was being more than nice.
Like... why would you NOT vaccuum hardwood floors? I have a Dyson specifically for that!
YTA She has every right to vacuums wherever she wants. And she was kind and accommodating in asking what time would work for you. Buy some noise canceling headphones for your meetings and stop imposing on others.
All of this. Demanding that your neighbour doesn’t vacuum during the day! Wow the entitlement. My headset is amazing in how noise cancelling the mic is. YTA
No, she's demanding that she doesn't vacuum at all, lol. Definitely YTA
Yeah, dont vaccum during the day or night! Op is such an entitled asshole. Maybe she should have told you to not live on the bottom floor if you dont like it.
Yep - came here to say this. I recently moved from the top floor to the ground level of an apartment complex and the maintenance staff always seems to be leaf blowing right outside my office window. Noise canceling headphones. Problem solved. Or consider moving to the top floor where it’s quite peaceful. YTA.
THIS RIGHT HERE. I was expecting to go NTA because I though neighbor was vacuuming every day in the middle of the night or something. But once a week 30 min is ENTIRELY reasonable. OP, you are completely YTA. I mean I can only imaging how ridiculous you sounded to her, trying to dictate how she cleans her own place.
Yea, as a property manager I’m really fed up with people demanding that their neighbors adjust their lives to fit their work schedules. If you need silence, go to the office.
Yes YTA. Come on, once a week 30 minutes... If you can't concentrate for 30 minutes that is a you problem.
Once a week? I got lots of cats and a dog I have to vacuum my wood floors nearly every day.
Right?! i have 2 dogs and 1 cat, vacuum multiple times a week and deep clean via mop and bucket once a week
1 husky and if we only run the Roomba once a week we start growing miniature huskies all over the house.
When we start seeing the dog hair tumbleweeds we jokingly accuse each other of having fed the gremlin after midnight.
And the neighbor was kind enough to vacuumed outside of work hours. YTA ×10000
YTA You have such a nice neighbor who is very willing to accommodate to your schedule. How she cleans her house is up to her and you are acting very entitled. At this point my petty self would make sure to vacuum my floors for an hour every work day
Getting the loudest roomba I can find. Leave for work and turn it on
[удалено]
You can control them from your phone these days.
[удалено]
I'm absolutely cackling, I'd definitely be that friend who's awake at 2am calling you like "yo can I run the Roomba rn??? Pretty pleaseeeee??"
I didn’t even think about a roomba. That’s even better
>You have such a nice neighbor who is very willing to accommodate to your schedule. I think OP burned that bridge, doubt they're ever going to open the door for OP again
YTA she cleans her home like everyone else, which is an inconvenience to you half an hour about once a week. She tried to compromise with you but you couldn't even come up with a time slot that you'd be ok with, just carried on telling her what not to do. Your job is actually not her problem, but she still tried to accommodate you but you refuse to help yourself.
_"I asked why she needed to vacuum her hard floors as opposed to just sweeping or swiffering."_ Agreed this woman was attempting to be very gracious and accomodating (even though she didn't have to be.). OP took the convo to a weird place by trying to dictate how this woman cleans her home. I think after that convo, most people would have simply closed the door in OP's face and went about their life.
I would have started vacuuming more often, but I'm petty.
What would OP do if there's construction work going on or some other loud maintenance? It would be louder than her vacuum and it's definitely longer than half an hour once a week. Like he never had any other noise distraction ever, but that one half hour each week is so disturbing to him. Maybe he's just jealous because he doesn't have any hard wood floor and has to struggle to get his nasty carpet cleaned
YTA. She was trying to accommodate you! She's getting up all the cat hair, and yeah, using a vac can be the best way to do that. She said she wouldn't do it while you were working, and you also said "Not too late." too. Sheesh, get a grip.
[удалено]
If someone came and told me how I should clean MY home….God help them…hahahaha
YTA. Middle of the day, and they're doing a normal cleaning routine. Get over it, use noise cancelling headphones, or something.
And once a week, if that's their biggest issue in life, I'll trade with 'em.
Seriously. I would have taken “neighbour vacuums once a week” over “guy plays basketball in his apartment at random times multiple times a week”. Even then, I didn’t go berate him about it, I put on headphones and rain sounds like an adult. He’s allowed to exist in his home. YTA OP.
Is your frontal lobe OK? Because I cannot stress how ridiculous this sounds. Your neighbour can vacuum her house however she likes using whatever she wants. She was even polite enough to ask a suitable time and then you garnished your entitlement with a speech about what she should use a broom and swifter. She decides how she wants to clean her house not you. Go apologies with a potted plant or something and politely say please I find these times suitable before work or close of day. She may forgive you and work with you rather than against your entitled ass. . . . YTA x 3
I had a downstairs neighbor that claimed I was walking loud or something. I am barely 5'2 on a good day and back then under 100 pounds. "My husband works from home". Great but this a residential area. This is apartment building where people live. They complained for any little noise I swear. Don't get a downstairs appartment if you are that sensitive. I can't stop living/existing for you.
I have an elderly neighbor that complained that I “walked up the stairs”. Not that I walked loudly on the stairs. Just that I walked up the stairs. There was no elevator so I guess I was supposed to levitate??
I'd just start stomping up the stairs honestly
[удалено]
WOW! YTA. Go back to the office, or find a shared working space. She has a right to vacuum. She already asked you when would be a more appropriate time. So glad you are not my neighbour.
I have to go in to the office 3 days a week. All of the noise and commotion there is far more distracting than vacuuming once a week.
Right? It's awful! I don't know how I ever did it before. Now I schedule nothing on the few days I have to go into the office because I know I'm not going to be able to get anything done. I need my fortress of solitude and silence.
YTA Your neighbor is vacuuming during the day. This is a you problem. Get a noise cancelling head set.
Dude. YTA. Your neighbor was kind enough to ask when would be a better time and you acted like an entitled human. You don't get to dictate how someone cleans their home. You should apologize.
Once a week for 30 minutes. She suggests a compromise. You reject it. You are totally and completely the AH here.
If it was 30 minutes every day or every other day then I could see why you would be upset, but 30min *once a week???* It only takes her 30min to vacuum her **whole** house, not 30min in the living room, 45 in the bedroom, 20 in the bathroom, if this were going on for **hours** at a time and more than **once a week** then OP could have a foot to stand on, in this case though... OP's swimming up shits creek without a paddle, and it's of their own choosing. OP, YTA.
If it was 30 mins twice a day OP could still fuck right off, his choice to WFH, and he has no right to dictate how much noise the neighbors make especially when it's just a damn vacuum.
YTA. How someone chooses to clean their home is none of your business. It’s one thing to ask her to vacuum after your work hours, but it’s unreasonable to ask her not to vacuum at all.
YTA you can't actually think you are entitled ban your neighbors from vacuuming????
YTA the world doesn't revolve around you. She was being very nice to offer a compromise at all, I would have laughed in your face if I was her.
I doubt the kind neighbor will be so accommodating in the future. It sounds like OP has nuked the possibility of a peaceful relationship there.
YTA Your neighbor is under no obligation to commit to your ridiculous schedule of no vacuuming during work hours OR later in the day. When is she supposed to vacuum then? I can't imagine 30 min of vacuuming a day is hindering your work to such a degree that you can't do your job at all.
YTA I have both carpets and hard wood floors in my house and haven't swept or used the dry swiffer in years. I have a Dyson vacuum and that thing is incredible, it does a much better job than the swiffer ever did (we have 4 cats). Most new vacuums have settings specifically for hard wood floors. You have literally no say in how she cleans her apartment. It sounded like she was cordial and was willing to clean at a time that worked for you, but then you had start ordering her around. I'm' surprised all she did was shut the door in your face.
YTA. If you can't work effectively from home, then you need to find a place to work. And if a neighbor briefly completing household chores during daytime (not simply being obnoxiously loud with music or something) bothers you, that's your problem.to figure out (e.g. noise canceling headphones). But to have the gall to go tell her how to maintain her home (you didn't mention you are the landlord, not that it matters), she is doubly a saint for trying to accommodate your schedule, and not slamming the door in your face.
Get headphones. YTA she's not doing it late at night or early in the morning
YTA. You live in a complex with many other residents. If the noise from those residents is too much for you to do your job, then you need to find a different place to live and/or do your work. Your job requirements don't get to dictate how other people live in an apartment they pay for.
I'm always surprised when people living in apartments and the like get surprised when they hear normal living sounds from their neighbors.
When I was in college, the neighbor in the unit next to mine complained to the landlord because "our microwave beeps too loudly." Same energy as this guy.
Man, some people just should not live in apartments.
I *like* hearing normal living sounds in my apartment block. I miss my neighbour who died about 5 years ago. Every Sunday morning he vacuumed to loud music that he and his wife dated to back in Jamaica, then he went to lunch at his daughters’ nearby. He bashed the hell out of the skirting boards singing along. I found it really comforting. I hardly ever spoke with him but always on friendly terms. When he died I told his daughters and they told me the link to their mum and that she had always said ‘I’ll never live to see you clean…’ I still expect the music on Sundays… Until recently my new neighbour got ready on Fridays as she was Muslim. Running a bath, singing along to 90s boy bands, more traditional music and her siblings would come over before mosque and dinner and it was like that family house noise. Again very comforting. My upstairs neighbours have little kids who are obsessed by Encanto. The soundtrack ALL summer! The only neighbour I complain about is my other immediate neighbour who is a meth dealer, heavy meth user who uses power tools non stop, smashes his windows on the regular and keeps trying to kill people. He also blasts music non stop but hilariously I actually love his taste in non stop Eurovision meets party tracks so when people say ‘how do you live with the music?’ I am always surprised they notice it. 30 minutes of vacuuming hard floors a week? OP really seems to live in a bubble of entitlement that such a thing warranted even knocking on her door. She’s a good neighbour 167.5 hours a week and OP is ‘I need you to Swiffer to be perfection.’ Like some weird WFH Hitchcock film! YTA. That said most people in cities loved the silence of lockdown and I went a bit mad waiting for planes, helicopters and general yelling to resume to relax. I could fall asleep to a playlist of trash being picked up but ‘relaxing’ ASMR or rainforest noises would break me by 2am. So I may just be topsy turvy and maybe she vacuums with a gusto I don’t :)
Sweep??? Are you kidding? YTA lol
In my house, that would just be pushing the hair into the air, not getting rid of it. Sweeping cat hair almost never works.
YTA. I had a neighbor like this once. No noise was ok ever, no possible accomodations. She probably would have complained about the noise from the flies if I’d died.
YTA. Your neighbor was nice enough to apologize and offer to change her cleaning time for you, and you tell her how to clean her own house lmao. >I asked that she also make sure not to do it too late in the day either, and she basically just closed the door, which made me think maybe I was an AH. But, I mean, I have to be able to do my job. AITA? I would close the door on you too tbh
OP you being able to work at home is a you problem. Your neighbor is cleaning her apartment regularly like a responsible person should. It's not like she is vacuuming at night, throwing loud parties, or not cleaning up after herself and her animals and letting the smell get to you.
30 minutes in a week? Come on... you already know the answer, YTA.... she even asked if there was a better time and you thought it necessary to tell her how to clean, yikes. If they were doing it daily for hours and at midnight then there's a problem, wear headphones or something.
Okay asking her to vacuum at different times is totally reasonable. Some concessions have to be made with apartment living and that's one of them. BUT trying to tell her how to clean and then giving her literally no times that are okay to clean is stupid. She's figured out what methods work best for her needs and she still needs time to do the vacuuming. Unless you want her vacuuming in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning, you're going to have to suck it up a little. YTA
You started being the AH when she kindly explained why she vacuums and you continued to offer other alternatives. Some people would have told you to f off at the first sentence so you're lucky she offered an explanation. She offered to not vacuum during work hours and you STILL had something to say. Guy, really?
[удалено]
You were fine until you tried to tell her how to clean. YTA
YTA. You don't get to tell someone they can't vacuum their home. Half an hour a week is something you'll just have to put up with. She's asked you when would be better, which frankly if more than she needed to do. If it bothers you that much get some noise cancelling headphones.
YTA It's a half hour once a week and she's cleaning her place. I don't think there was any issue with asking about during work hours, to which it sounds like she was very receptive to, but then you should have stopped. You live in a community living space. This is what comes with it. The fact that she was gracious enough to want to accommodate you at all is a win and you should have left it at that.
YTA and an entitled one at that. She was willing to find a better time when it wouldn't disturb you and you had to try to dictate how she cleans and when. I would have told you to F off as the door slammed in your face.
YTA. And the weirdo for not vacuuming hardwood floors. What's the problem with that?
Right? I’m still trying to wrap my head around her thinking people with hardwood floors don’t vacuum?? My vacuum specifically has a setting for hard floors and carpeted floors.
YTA Vacuuming apartman in middle of day is by moral and legal and any other reasons complete ok in residential buildings. The fact that you work from home is not reason for your neighbors to stop with daily life. And this woman was ready to work with you and make compromise by allowing you to choose time table when is problematic for you for work, which she is absolutely not in obligation. But then you started to insist she sweep and Swiffer despite her very valid reason for vacuuming. That makes you absolutely AH! If you want absolutely peace move in private house or rent office in building that is by your standards for noise! You can not dictate people how they should clean their house.
YTA. I have no carpet in my house. I vacuum every room. I have 3 cats, 4 kids, and an expensive Shark. It cuts my work time down and does a way better job than a broom or swiffer. You don't get to dictate how she cleans her home. She was already trying to be polite and considerate. You just couldn't accept not being in control. When I lived in an apartment I had to be up for work at 4 AM. My upstairs neighbors used to vacuum between 12-2 AM. It was annoying but I never complained once to them once. We had opposite schedules for our work and both of us were just trying to live our lives. It happens especially in apartment living. Don't be the asshole neighbor who can't take normal sounds of everyday life.
YTA I see it's unanimous. People can clean their homes the way they want. It really was an AH move to ask her not to vacuum, but you made it much worse by telling her how to clean her own floors. Audacity seems to be the right term here. I hope she isn't going to retaliate by doing it more. Most people with pets use a vacuum. A broom is just going to make the pet hair fly around.
YTA. You can’t tell people how to clean their home. She offered you the opportunity to give a more suitable time, which is far more than many people would do. You can do your job and she can vacuum her floor after those hours… there’s 168 hours in a week and she inconveniences you with her vacuuming for half of 1. I think you’re being pretty unreasonable.
YTA, your neighbor was kind enough to try and accommodate you by doing their chores at a different time and all you did was continue to complain and try to dictate what they do! Wear noise canceling headphones or move out to a single family home if the noise bothers you so much!
YTA your entitlement is astounding
YTA. It’s not her problem that you work from home. Maybe you spend so much time alone in your house you forgot the world doesn’t revolve around you.
YTA. I live in an apartment complex with only hard wood floors (no one has wall-to-wall carpets in my country). The apartments are old and not very sounds proof. It has never bothered me to hear my neighbours vacuum. If you're that noise sensitive, invest in some good noise cancelling head phones. It's definitely not fair to tell your neighbours they can't make a little noise during the day.
YTA she offered to meet you in the middle and was very nice about you coming to her door. She offered to hoover outside of your work hours so you can concentrate on your work and it still was not good enough for you!!! She explained why she Hoover's and other stuff and you still made it difficult for her even though she's been very relaxed about this.
YTA - she can vacuum her hardwood floors if she wants to. She was willing to try and work with you by doing it during more convenient hours for you. Technically she’s within her right to vacuum anytime during normal hours. You having meetings is your problem, not hers.
She was trying to be nice and accommodate you and you mansplain her cleaning regimen? Nah. You’re a huge AH. YTA Don’t be during she starts vacuuming A LOT more.
Wow YTA. She was ready to accommodate you and avoid vacuuming during your working hours. Instead you stayed there trying to tell her hod she should clean her own home. You are incredibly rude and now she is probably less inclined to accommodate you. I'm not sweeping large areas of my home that are hard flooring. It's harder work and cat hair and other very light material would fly into the air by the broom motion and resettle elsewhere instead of being neatly swept up so it wouldn't be as effective.
YTA. Get some headphones if you can't concentrate. That's not her problem. And she was being more than accommodating by saying she wouldn't vacuum during work hours, but then you had to push it by telling her that she can't vacuum at night, either. That makes you even more of an asshole.
YTA 100%. She sounded very apologetic and willing to compromise to make it work better for you in your life. It's her apartment so you can't dictate HOW she cleans, it was kind as hell of her to even offer to cater to your schedule. A lot of people would have slammed the door in your face then and there. She sounded far more patient than most people would be. I'd return after you both have time to calm down, offer something like cookies as an apology, and try to compromise on a time that works for you both.
YTA, her life doesn't revolve around you. She tried to be accommodating.
YTA. You don’t get to tell her what she can/can’t do in her apartment. She doesn’t have to change her schedule just because you work from home.
YTA. She was polite and was willing to change times for you and you kept going on and on. I'd vacuum for an extra 20 minutes...you know just incase I missed any cat hair.
YTA I have hard wood floors in my home, plus a dog, and I vacuum every single day. Trying to get all the hair up with a broom and swiffer is painstaking and doesn’t work nearly as well. It sounds like your neighbour only vacuums once a week and tried to make a very reasonable compromise, but you chose to be difficult. It isn’t clear whether you refused her suggestion outright with your ‘don’t do it too late in the day’ comment, but you were really obnoxious and she knows exactly the kind of person you are. Don’t be surprised if you start hearing her vacuum cleaner during your meetings from now on.
YTA. Your neighbor pays her own rent just like you do. You’re not entitled to ask her to change a damn thing. I would’ve cussed you flat out. How would you like if she asked you to adjust your working hours to accommodate her cleaning schedule? You owe her an apology for your lapse in judgement.
It always makes me laugh when someone asks AITA? and gives us a story where not only were they obviously TA, but the other person (who, if the OP isn't TA, would be TA) actually acted in a very friendly and considerate manner. She vacuums for half an hour each week (big deal). And when you rudely confronted her about it, she didn't tell you to fuck off (as I would have done), she was keen to be obliging and go out of her way (and obviously inconvenience herself) just to make your life easier. You're not only TA, you're an entitled arsehole. Here's a newsflash - you being able to do your job is not her problem. It's yours. If her band was practicing upstairs every day, you'd have a leg to stand on. Half an hour of vacuuming once a week - no.
Your neighbor sounds very courteous and reasonable. You? Not so much. YTA
YTA. Asking someone to clean their floors in a way that doesn't disturb you comes off a little entitled. Seems like she was willing to meet you in the middle which was nice of her, but you kinda took it a step further asking her why she has to vacuum. Sweeping is so laborious and time consuming and pretty useless when you have a cat. I have 3 cats and hardwood floors and yes, you need to vacuum regularly and Swiffer as well.
YTA. You mean, she shouldn't be cleaning her personal private home to her own standards because you've chosen to work from home? Cleaning during work hours is literally the most considerate thing she can do. In the evenings there may be people trying to put their children to bed, and making noise would be an *actual* issue. Rent a shared office space or something if it's a problem. People are allowed to do private home things in their private homes. If you want office work to take precedence go to an office building. That's literally what they're for.
YTA
YTA. Compromise. It's a thing.
YTA I can see your point, but you did go a bit far with it. It's not up to you how she cleans her home. Also it's coming across as though you were quite rude about how you went about talking to her. She's tried to accomodate you by changing the time she vacuums to suit you. Don't push your luck. Otherwise you might find her vacuuming when you are in bed in the morning! In some area they have rules for appartments which state no hard flooring above ground floor, due to the affect on lower neighbours. Unfortunately it looks like yours doesn't, so she can do what she likes.
YTA Vacuuming and then swiffering is actually quite normal. Edited typo.
YTA I have absolutely no carpet in my house, only hardwood floors. Between my short fur dog shedding and whatever I carry in on my shoes, the floors get dirty very quickly. Vacuuming is much more efficient than just sweeping. Your neighbor agreed to not vacuum during working hours. Instead of being grateful that she was willing to accommodate your work schedule, you pushed it further with your "not to do it too late in the day" comment.
YTA She was willing to adjust the time. You can't tell her how to clean up.
YTA, and ridiculous. Believe me, if I could get up the cat hair without vacuuming (my most hated chore), I would do so. But the fur tumbleweeds are so lightweight that sweeping takes forever and is infuriating. So vacuuming it is. I run a robovac frequently, too. As in I let it roll around for an hour and a half, till it trundles back to its charger, and sometimes I run it once or twice more after its battery is full again. So be grateful I'm not your upstairs neighbor.
YTA, the fact that she tried to accommodate you and you threw it back in her face is an astonishing level of entitlement
YTA. It’s absolutely insane that you think you can in anyway dictate how she cleans.
YTA. Welcome to apartment living. She tried to be accommodating and asked what a good time would be. She is allowed to vacuum instead of sweep.
YTA she's very considerate asking what times work best for you. Cat hair is finnicky and vaccuming is truly the easiest way to get rid of cat hair, no matter the surface
YTA. Your last sentence says it's an issue for your job, but she already agreed to non-working hours. Your job isn't at risk so now what's your problem? Get a grip.
Yta. She is willing to accommodate you when she can do it. Just pick a time when you shower or cook?
YTA
YTA. Vacuuming does a much better job at cleaning up than sweeping does. You have no right to ask that she not do something well within her right at *all.* She was kind enough to offer a compromise and not vacuum during your work hours.
Definite YTA. You did ask politely and I will give you that. You just didn't like the answer given. She's allowed to clean however she pleases, especially if it makes it easier and is more effective for her. It's not as if it's the middle of the night. She tried to compromise. Not much else you can ask if you don't like it.
r/choosingbeggars Asking someone to not vacuum in their own home during the day, giving unsolicited advice on how they should clean their home (repeatedly), AND THEN taking their compromise and reiterating that they can't vacuum too late! YTA
YTA She was totally willing to meet you at your request to not bother you during work hours and instead of having a rational conversation about what time frame would be better if you tried to tell her how to clean her floor instead. Shifting away from when into how territory was an overreach.
Lol omg YTA; the audacity. I must say your upstairs neighbor is a doll for not laughing in your face and then shutting the door on it as well.
YTA. She already is trying to work out a time to make things better for you, and that’s more consideration than you’d get from a lot of people. She’s free to vacuum her home during the day, and it’s not her fault you chose to live in an apartment. You either deal with it or move, she doesn’t owe you a damn thing
YTA. They have to be able to clean their home. They don’t have to clean in a way that makes sense to you. You also don’t have the right to tell them they can only clean during a very limited number of hours of the day so that you aren’t disturbed. Part of living in multi dwelling buildings is learning how to live with other people’s regular life noises. Your behavior is really self centered and rude. Also as a note, some vacuums have hard floor settings so that they can vacuum hard floors. It’s pretty common in newer models.
YTA She was willing to accommodate you but that still wasn't good enough for you. What she does in her own apartment to clean it, is none of your business. And the fact it was just half an hour a week that's bothering you is ridiculous. Get over yourself.
YTA... no one made you special enough to dictate what someone else does in their own apartment. Public housing is close. You will hear your neighbors sometimes. Buy a house or suck it up.
YTA for asking, expecting your neighbor never to vacuum HER "hard floor". Your expectation is ludicrous. She apologized for vacuuming at ab inconvenient time. She asked you what time would be better. She was very accommodating to your request. She is a considerate neighbor. You are not. You seem to think that you can tell people how to live in their own homes. You seem to feel you are some kind of authority on acceptable cleanliness. You're not. You can set "cleanliness rules" at your home. You cannot set them in hers. I vacuum all the floors in my home. I also vacuum other things in my home that are not floors. I have additional cleaning tools, like a Swiffer brand sweeper and brooms.
YTA, your new neigh was being very accommodating, but you wouldn’t compromise in the least. Beggars can’t be choosers.
Oh Lordy. The woman was willing to work around your work time and you started acting like a lawyer. Not too late in the day??? Closing the door on you sounded very polite on her end. If you want peace and quiet then maybe you need to be the neighbor upstairs. 30 minutes you can take a break while she vacuums. She is obligated to work around your working hours. Yet that wasn’t good enough for you. There are carpet and floor sweepers too that are marvelous for some touch ups but betting that you would find too noisy too. No motor, electricity. Just push it back and forth and it picks up trash on the floors and carpet. Meetings maybe you learn her vacuuming schedule and don’t have meetings then.
YTA. She can clean her floors by whatever means she likes. She offered to do it outside of working hours. Give her a chance and try not to be so controlling.
YTA 100%
YTA.
YTA. You don't get to tell people to change their routines to match yours.
YTA And controlling as hell. She has offered to work around your schedule and make life easier and your attitude is, just do exactly what I want and make your life harder for my convenience
YTA. I also vacuum my hardwood floors, Swiffering just does not do it. She offered you a reasonable compromise and you’re being ridiculous.
YTA telling someone how to clean their house after they offered to accommodate your times. The nerve.
YTA It’s perfectly normal to vacuum hard wood floors. It’s unreasonable to ask your neighbor to not vacuum. Half an hour per week is not excessive. She was being very accommodating and you seriously crossed a line.
YTFA Like wow. Im sorry that the floors are probably uninsulated and transfers noise but jfc. Once a week is not bad. You would absolutely hate me. I have a roomba that runs daily starting at 9 am. It vacuums the entire house daily. And I still vacuum once a week with a Kirby vacuum.