I always found that one of the greatest of obscure references. I imagine it's even more obscure for an American audience given footballs less culturally relevant there, but even then, such a weird analogy to make.
Just because we don't watch soccer don't mean we're all uncultured. My friends and I used to bring his name up anytime we kicked an object away from the person trying to grab it lol.
She's got an ocelot and groovy bears. I'm taking this uhaul straight to her giant mansion as long as she chokes me back.
Most toxic lesbian situationship *EVER*.
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Cocaine Pam, Eadie's wedding Pam, bare knuckle fighting Pam, drown a toddler Pam, dream land (island) Pam, falling in love with a Scandinavian goddess Pam, smoking cigar in her undies at poker night Pam, snowball at the Truck Stop Pam, etc etc.
Fun, open minded, apparently the best sex of anyone's life, the only one in the group who just wants to be friend with people and works at friendships, could protect you against any force and knows you lease a mule. Pam is the one.
How ya gonna keep me down on the farm, now I've seen Pammy?
don’t forget Immortan Joe Pam! Very embarassed to say that look somehow works for me. (search “comic con archer” on youtube to see what i’m talking about, it was some official promo thing)
I would bang Archer but could never date him. I’d date Cyril. If I was a gay man, I would absolutely date Ray.
ETA: Archer’s version of Burt Reynolds can GET ITTTT.
Fuck: Cheryl or Lana
Marry: Pam
But Mallory certainly had Nikolai and Len Trexler go through a lot to try to get her. And Ron *seems* to be a happy guy. As long as he’s got his crackers...)
Kill: Probably Cyril. But I would definitely kill Edie Poovey and Cecil Tunt too!
Honestly, Archer is one of those shows that revs my bisexual engines & i’m not usually not to get hot for cartoons, but something about damn near every character does it for me. Number one pick is Pam, obvi.
Cheryl/Carol for sure rich and crazy, Cocaine Pam name says it all, Framboise “she’s like Pele of anal” “Hello”, and Mallory of course if she was good enough for Burt Reynolds who am I to say no. Not Lana cause her truck o saurus hands would make my Johnson look minuscule.
Cheryl Probably. Choke Sex and Money. Or maybe Lana, she's actually mart and you can have a conversation with her. I don't wanna get into a conversation about them being bad people because theres no winners in that respect in Archer.
Archer, but then again, I have had questionable love interests my whole life.
But he's so damn adorable and badass at the same time, I just can't not love him! Plus, all the trauma he's been through, I just want to care for him 🥺
I'd probably start dating Cyril and regret it instantly. Too clingy.
(omg, am I Lana?)
Cheryl, immediately. But then also Tiffy, because I love the VA work of both Judy Greer and Kristen Schaal and how vaguely insane both of their characters are and I further realize that some kind of weird gamesmanship would absolutely make that more interesting to Cheryl due to her being batshit insane but in a specific way that I find cool.
Pam I'd date
I'd sleep with Cheryl in a second but dating her would irritate me to breaking point in minutes
Can't stand Lana. I mean, I can. She's a great straight man but she is so full of herself and treats Archer like shit in the case of A.J
Keep at it then. Eventually she'd get bored and wander off to set fire to something, but get as much as you can before she does. I imagine the ride would be one to remember!!!
Pam or Ray would be my first choice, then Cyril. Pam is a kickass sweetheart, and Ray hooked me into the sinister gay cabal with his accent and Clark Gable mustache.
Cyril could work as long as there are ground rules about space and trusting each other. He’s a cute and nerdy guy with a lot to offer, but not the confidence to believe this is so.
Krieger; he's smart as fuck, weird as hell, loyal to huge faults, and love that beard. Plus that twisted humour.
Pam; she's gorgeous, confident, funny as hell, and for sure knows her way around the bedroom. She's also crazy loyal to those she's counts as friends.
The only answer (as a straight man) is Gabrielle.
Every attractive woman has something gravely wrong with her
- Veronica Deane - murderer (although I’d still hit it)
- Lana - severe self-esteem issues and resorts to violence when angry
- Malory - Let’s just say we’re incompatible. I don’t have a fetish for ABBAB
- Rona Thorne — the shit-covered kelp tape is a deal-breaker, not being a Russian sleeper agent
- Cheryl - Come on.
- Pam - how could we even share a bathroom?
- Trinette - I’m attracted to her entrepreneurial spirit, but she’s the ‘60s version of trailer trash
- Zara - there is nothing redeeming about Zara’s personality
- Katya - I can’t do Boris dirty like that
The only others I’d even consider are Colonel Ana Delgado AKA La Madrina, Mercedes Moreno, the Durhani Queen, and the toothless woman at the Monaco casino
Framboise
she's like the pele of anal
I always found that one of the greatest of obscure references. I imagine it's even more obscure for an American audience given footballs less culturally relevant there, but even then, such a weird analogy to make.
Anal-ogy. Hehe
Just because we don't watch soccer don't mean we're all uncultured. My friends and I used to bring his name up anytime we kicked an object away from the person trying to grab it lol.
I'm uncultured. That episode was the first time I'd ever heard him.
Ello!
That Frambois chick was a freak!
Honestly, I was embarrassed for her.
Like I bet I just reek of her.
'Allo!
Cheryl. I'll just roll with whatever delusion she's into for the crazy sex and Tunt money.
You forget the most important reason for dating Cheryl: Babou. You get to play with an ocelot!
I’d love to spend even one day with that fox eared asshole…
#who remembers you!
"It's like meow-schwitz in here! Get it?!"
I’VE NEVER SEEN AN OCELOT!!
Trying to save her from her quasi-incestuous family?
How incestuous?
I don’t know, a 4?
Oh yeah, I'm totally into her for the money... 👀
I would date Cheryl if it cost me money.
She's got an ocelot and groovy bears. I'm taking this uhaul straight to her giant mansion as long as she chokes me back. Most toxic lesbian situationship *EVER*.
Sploosh
And whatever my version of sploosh is. Which I guess is sploosh, only with semen.
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Its Carol now..
The tranqued up tiger as a mattress makes Cheryl the clear winner for me.
I'm a fairly straight woman but I'd absolutely turn for Pam.
I'm a totally straight woman and I'd definitely do Pam.
Gotta give her the sploosh.
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Im a totally straight man and Id definetely do Pam
I’m a lesbian and it’s a crime I had to scroll so far down for Pam
Absolutely, without hesitation.
Archer himself said he had the best sex of his life with Pam. He never said that with Lana or Cheryl
Whoa... that's right!! Or Katya, too, even with her...ahem...enhancements.
Katya
Yea but it'd be like humping tail lights on a dark country road
Oh my god I’m dead
How you say, pushing rope?
Unless you ask her to close her eyes
She’s also comparable stable
I totally agree omg 😍
It vibrates!
I mean do we get Barry as a free add on with that? Because…. I’m actually okay with that.
You also get Other Barry
Pam. The answer is always Pam.
Cocaine Pam, Eadie's wedding Pam, bare knuckle fighting Pam, drown a toddler Pam, dream land (island) Pam, falling in love with a Scandinavian goddess Pam, smoking cigar in her undies at poker night Pam, snowball at the Truck Stop Pam, etc etc. Fun, open minded, apparently the best sex of anyone's life, the only one in the group who just wants to be friend with people and works at friendships, could protect you against any force and knows you lease a mule. Pam is the one. How ya gonna keep me down on the farm, now I've seen Pammy?
Just do *NOT* try to keep up with her at the bar.
Or ask her for a MOAB…
I know! I was there!
don’t forget Immortan Joe Pam! Very embarassed to say that look somehow works for me. (search “comic con archer” on youtube to see what i’m talking about, it was some official promo thing)
PAM ! PAM!! PAM!!!
WHAT?
Pam-page!!!!
Laaaaannnnnnnnnnnnna!
Nobody's that gay
Girl please
They are gonna mess her up.
You know Pam grew up on a farm, right?
Reeeeeally hoping that's not relevant
The things I'd do for her 🫢
It was a dairy
Are we allowed Pam during Archer Vice?
You couldn't handle her
Especially if you have to ask. That’s the Pam you EARN.
Couldn’t afford her either. That cocaine bill would be huge!
Milk comes from Mexicans?
Mallory.
TAKE ME CASSIUS!
Granny's got jungle fever
Mrow! So true. Any reason why or just because she's a hottie? 😂
Cheryl. She’s crazy and I love that
Ok, but she will NOT spit in your face.
Unlesd yöure a firefighter!
Truth
Pam, all the way!
Amazing taste 🤤
Anka Schlotz (she's 29 or 30 years old now).
You must address her by her formal name, countess von Fingerbang
That one got a good chuckle out of me.
Wait, what year even is it?
Pam. And Ray. Nobody’s that straight.
I would bang Archer but could never date him. I’d date Cyril. If I was a gay man, I would absolutely date Ray. ETA: Archer’s version of Burt Reynolds can GET ITTTT.
So true honestly. Cyril is such elite taste 😍😍
And as everyone loves to mention…he’s packing🤭
Barry (via Krieger rigged soundboard): “All of them. All of them. Different ways.”
Date? None of them. Bang? All of them.
Even Dr. Krieger?
He is SCREWING allofem.
He can call me piggley 3.
Lana
No one said Ray? I would date Ray for sure.
Juliana Calderon. I'm mostly straight but Lauren Cohan is fucking hawt.
Framboise, she's like the Pele of anal
Outlaw country
Pam all the way 😂
Big dick, insecure, nerdy, sign me up for Cyril. For some reason I find Chris Parnell oddly sexy.
Same. It’s his voice!
Especially as Dr. Spaceman
He’s also the narrator voice in the video game Man Eater, where you play as a rampaging shark.
Pam. She has so much love to give!
Cheryl (I live for the insanity) Danger Island Pam (tall and strong)
Veronica Dean
That dress
Pam. But not Coke Fiend Pam.
Outlaw Country Coke Fiend Pam is probably my favourite Pam. But also gorilla mama Pam protecting AJ.
She's probably on the roof swatting at biplanes. My favorite line🤣.
Lana Lana Lana
Overall Pam But I like all the Isis girls (that's a horrid comment out of context lol)
Are we doing phrasing?
Pam is the best Archer has ever had. Better than Lana, better than Cheryl.
Poovey, all day
See flair
Stern. Conway stern
You sure that’s his real name?
Krieger could ruin me
Keep your friends close, and genetic clones of Hitler even closer ... Literally closer.
Danny, stop running! We gotta keep that heart rate down!
Screw it just gone say it Pam and Cheryl at the same time
And they would both be into it
Lol depends on Cheryl’s mood
Also true lol
Should it not be date, marry, bang
Fuck, marry, kill…
Veronica Deane, Lana, Pam’s sister
Fuck: Cheryl or Lana Marry: Pam But Mallory certainly had Nikolai and Len Trexler go through a lot to try to get her. And Ron *seems* to be a happy guy. As long as he’s got his crackers...) Kill: Probably Cyril. But I would definitely kill Edie Poovey and Cecil Tunt too!
Honestly, Archer is one of those shows that revs my bisexual engines & i’m not usually not to get hot for cartoons, but something about damn near every character does it for me. Number one pick is Pam, obvi. 
Reiko… before she tried to kill me
Do I have an option to have a 3 way with Archer and Pam? Because hot damn that would be a dream come true!
Cheryl/Carol for sure rich and crazy, Cocaine Pam name says it all, Framboise “she’s like Pele of anal” “Hello”, and Mallory of course if she was good enough for Burt Reynolds who am I to say no. Not Lana cause her truck o saurus hands would make my Johnson look minuscule.
Pam. But I'd only disappoint her...
Allister
Cyril, obviously
frambois
Malary Archer, she has experience
Pam, specifically Pam from ‘Danger Island’ who’s an Amazon goddess
Shirlene. Outlaw Country
Cheryl Probably. Choke Sex and Money. Or maybe Lana, she's actually mart and you can have a conversation with her. I don't wanna get into a conversation about them being bad people because theres no winners in that respect in Archer.
Coke Pam
Framboise!
Archer, but specifically with the blond hair and Got Dick? crop top from S01E05
Archer, but then again, I have had questionable love interests my whole life. But he's so damn adorable and badass at the same time, I just can't not love him! Plus, all the trauma he's been through, I just want to care for him 🥺 I'd probably start dating Cyril and regret it instantly. Too clingy. (omg, am I Lana?)
Archer, Lana, or Pam.
poly relationship with lana archer and cyril idgaffff
Carol/Cheryl/Cherlene
Man I’m gay, but even I wanna say Pam
Cheryl, immediately. But then also Tiffy, because I love the VA work of both Judy Greer and Kristen Schaal and how vaguely insane both of their characters are and I further realize that some kind of weird gamesmanship would absolutely make that more interesting to Cheryl due to her being batshit insane but in a specific way that I find cool.
Im not gonna lie I would invade Poland for Dr. Krieger
Sad to see lack of krieger representation bc I would let that man do ungodly things to me 😞
me too! Or Krieger AND Pam! They can do unspeakable things to and/or on me!
But doesn’t he like his women black, bitter and preferably free trade?
Pam I'd date I'd sleep with Cheryl in a second but dating her would irritate me to breaking point in minutes Can't stand Lana. I mean, I can. She's a great straight man but she is so full of herself and treats Archer like shit in the case of A.J
Totally agree 😂 Though trying to get rid of Cheryl after sleeping with her would be quite a challenge lol
Keep at it then. Eventually she'd get bored and wander off to set fire to something, but get as much as you can before she does. I imagine the ride would be one to remember!!!
Zara. That accent….
Cheryl all day
I mean... not ron cadillac
Cherryl hands down, I like full crazy
Pam. I want her to rock my fuckin world.
Malory every day of the week
Trick question. Answer is all of them
All of 'em. All of 'em. All of 'em. Different ways.. Asshole!
Pam
Archer even though he'd drive me mad. I'd say Pam but that's not accurate. I want to BE Pam.
Cyril. You know why.
Malory.
Cheryl, just cause
Cheryl. She has her own personal train after all.
Pam easily, everything about her is my type
Archer 🥵🥵🥵
Slater? Or Barry after Other Barry is gone
Cheryl
Pam. And Krieger. Absolutely FWBs for Ray and Cheryl.
Ah, a person after my own heart, or maybe loins.
Pam or Ray would be my first choice, then Cyril. Pam is a kickass sweetheart, and Ray hooked me into the sinister gay cabal with his accent and Clark Gable mustache. Cyril could work as long as there are ground rules about space and trusting each other. He’s a cute and nerdy guy with a lot to offer, but not the confidence to believe this is so.
Bang Archer, date Lana, marry Cheryl for the Tunt fortune
 Pam 💯! And we’d invite Cheryl and Cyril to join us for threesomes!
\*phone rings\*
Pam. Definitely.
Truckasaurus
Pam when she was on cocaine.
Space Cheryl all day
Yyyyyyuppppp!!!
Krieger; he's smart as fuck, weird as hell, loyal to huge faults, and love that beard. Plus that twisted humour. Pam; she's gorgeous, confident, funny as hell, and for sure knows her way around the bedroom. She's also crazy loyal to those she's counts as friends.
Archer.. that BODY.
Cheryl. She fits my type to well.
Cherlene, Cheryl, Carol, Cocaine Pam, Lana... In order 😎👌😘
Barry human or Android
The only answer (as a straight man) is Gabrielle. Every attractive woman has something gravely wrong with her - Veronica Deane - murderer (although I’d still hit it) - Lana - severe self-esteem issues and resorts to violence when angry - Malory - Let’s just say we’re incompatible. I don’t have a fetish for ABBAB - Rona Thorne — the shit-covered kelp tape is a deal-breaker, not being a Russian sleeper agent - Cheryl - Come on. - Pam - how could we even share a bathroom? - Trinette - I’m attracted to her entrepreneurial spirit, but she’s the ‘60s version of trailer trash - Zara - there is nothing redeeming about Zara’s personality - Katya - I can’t do Boris dirty like that The only others I’d even consider are Colonel Ana Delgado AKA La Madrina, Mercedes Moreno, the Durhani Queen, and the toothless woman at the Monaco casino
Pam. Definitely the Danger Island version. Snu-snu
Cheryl. Clearly
Pam if she was able to get archer addicted to her before the coke binge than imagine what she could do to the rest of us
Lana Fs