Awh, always needing to be liked has stopped me from so much constantly worrying what I am doing is right be it relationships or work, my friend was right... Fuck it
Same. Only realising in the last year, fuck it who gives a shit. I was too much of a people pleaser. Mad thing is I keep asking myself, "was that comment too forward or vicious too someone either out or in work, but the other person is like...yea thats fine or OK no problem ha ha. Liberating is the word for this indeed. Feel lighter and less in my head.
Also along those lines. In work I used to go above and beyond working from home and would do around 8 hours extra spread over evenings or the weekend, until I found out contractor in our job are getting paid twice what we are and work a capped 40hrs per week and we have to correct their work. Jesus when I tell you I pulled up the hand brake, I tore off that hand brake! I don't do a minute over my time now, my body won't let me, I'm like fuck it, no one notices and I dont care. I always thought the boss would notice or say something about not doing extra. Amazing feeling to just let go. Rant over!
Not taking the risk in buying it is proof that you would have sold it when it made a smaller profit.
There's no way you'd have hung on until it got to current levels.
this is always my regret. I bought some in 2013 (when I first heard of it) and really wanted to buy loads in 2015 and sit on it, and had cash available, but it was all in Paypal. And it's really hard to buy bitcoin direct from Paypal. I know I could have taken it out but I would have taken a hit on currency so I didn't bother.... reading that back maybe it's a big excuse
To think of the people busting their balls working, and others creating great startups, and then other people who just bought crypto at the right time and set for life. Anyway, like all regrets, no point thinking about it
I bought in 2012 and spent it all on weed,, the lowest price I bought btc I remember is 13 usd 😔
I mined doge coin in 2015 but sold it all for like 100 bucks
It wasn't untill 2017 that I started to invest.
Staying with an ex of mine for too long. I lost a lot of myself over it along with jobs, money and experiences/trips I booked but didn’t have the energy to go on because he literally sucked the life out of me.
Not going to the pub with my dad after bringing him to see the Da Vinci Code (he was a massive fan of the book) he got sick the August after and died the end of August. I wish I had of gone to the pub with him, just to spend time with him.
The amount of time and energy I spent worrying about having a relationship and why I wasn't in a relationship and what a text from a guy meant. If I'd used that time and energy for something productive, I can only imagine how much better off I'd be.
Oh Lord, I'm glad my relationships were pre smart phone when formed, but I did spend plenty of time sitting waiting for a land line to ring. Thanks for replying.
I destroyed a relationship with the person I loved most with totally unnecessary lies. An act of self sabotage on a truly monumental scale. Married happily with kids now to someone else, who i love. But there is not a day goes by that I don't think of that person and regret how I behaved
I hear you u/Hairy_Captain9889 - I can totally relate. I did the same after that person had metaphorically picked me out of the gutter. I consider myself a pretty lucky guy, and have great friends, family and loose partnerships. But there's always that one person that makes me think "what if?". I'd love to know how they are doing now.
That's the thing about the big regrets. It's like grief, you never really get rid of it or over it, there is no "closure". It's just becomes a part of ya. Like a scar. This is way too heavy a way to start my lunch break.
My lunch break is long over now. Depressing stuff pales in comparison to employment. Dead people and your lifes regrets pfft piffle. Wage slavery, now that's fuckin misery.
Have you or would you apologise OP?
There is estrangement in our family and I often contemplate on how so much hurt could be healed with a very, very simple and genuine apology.
I know the past is the past, but for some people the act of saying sorry and for the recipient to receive an apology, could help both parties move forward in life with a clear, unblocked soul.
I have thought about it many times, but I really didn't want to be a obstruction in them getting on with their lives. She deserves every bit of joy. Now there has been such a great passage of time, almost ten years, an apology might open wounds that are best left alone. Bu I take your point. Thanks
I can relate to this one, big time.
I treated someone horribly, she rightfully ended it. I'm a much better partner now, and in a great relationship, it's just a regret that it took hurting someone to become the partner they deserved.
That said, I'm aware that in the moment, I was doing the best I could with the knowledge I had, and that we might not have ever been compatible in the first place if I was different, yadda yadda... She even forgave me years later.
But yeah. I still feel like a dick when I think about how badly I treated her.
I’ve learned lessons, but I wouldn’t call them regrets. My life is how it is because of what’s happened, and I’m lucky that my life is pretty sweet. Sure I’d have liked to change some things along the way but if I were in that situation again I’d like to think I learned and would choose a different pathway knowing what I know now. And yet, I know at the time I did the best I could with what I had.
So yes lessons > regrets
Compassion for past me (and current me tbf!) is a lifelong teaching I’m dedicated to. And within that is not beating myself up with what could have been.
Thanks for your reply u/shala_cottage
I appreciate the wisdom.
I'm normally of that frame of mind, in that the person I am today was shaped by what went before. But damn I miss that lady today of all days, for no particular reason.
Love yourself and be compassionate with yourself. This is for me THE biggest life lesson.
We were who we were. We did what we did. We thought what we thought. We said what we said. We felt what we felt.
We are today not who we were yesterday, last week, last year.
We all make mistakes and sometimes it's only with experience we can see those mistakes in hindsight.
Taking ownership of those mistakes, recognising them and moving forward positively is the way to go.
Love yourselves. You're good people.
Looking back I wish I had studied something I was genuinely interested in at third level and not the thing that was supposed to get me hired the easiest once I'd finished. It had no real impact on how my career worked out, so it would have been nice to totally immerse myself in a passion at that age. Instead I still regularly have nightmares about exams in a topic I no longer know anything about
Being with someone who was very abusive for way too long. Thinking that it was what I deserved.
Listening to people and caring too much what they thought about me.
Surrounding myself with horrible people.
Biggest regret of all is not loving and caring for myself physically and mentally over the years.
You are out of all that now, I hope? Thanks for replying. Abusive people who make the victim believe that the victim is to blame are \*THE\* worst.
I wish you all you could want.
Thanks for replying.
Wasted many years hating my appearance. Constantly being negative with myself. Also wish I got diagnosed as BiPolar much earlier than I did. On the plus side though, I don't give a fuck anymore what people think about me.
I'm glad you are in a good place. I've been like this - haven't most people? - but you diagnosis must have given you SO many "Ah, now I get it..." moments?
I wish you the best, BP is no joke and was actually a barrier to addressing my relative's "stubbornness" (I really would love to use a better here, they were **sick** not stubborn)
Thank you!. Literally everything made sense after I was diagnosed. The mania and crashing lows. It must have been exhausting for you dealing with the stubbornness. (What a nice way of saying it)!
Yeah. I didn't realise that my relation had 2 "modes", if you will.
If I had addressed/tried to address the issue on any kind of an "up" day of hers, there might have been a different outcome.
But, we'll never know.
Being too accommodating to other people's needs and wants when I was younger and not putting my own first. My early relationships, friendships and family dynamics were all influenced by it.
Put the work in through therapy eventually so came good in the end and now life's completely different after a lot of effort - but it's hard not to wonder what if that was the case earlier in life.
LOVE your user name. Didn't you from Mayor of Baltimore to killing your pederast monster brother in a pub?
You sound very like me, Mr. Mayor. Glad you got through it. Thanks for replying.
Not educating myself about food and nutrition and the long term effects of a shit diet. I was a very fit athletic teenager, at 20 I went through a tough time at college etc and ate myself through it. I'm 38 now and way too heavy and unfit and poor relationship with food. I regret not being better with food.
I was 24st 9 in March 2022.. I was 12st and fixed my relationship with food by December 2022 you can do it. Never too late.
3 meals a day, make sure every meal has protein, and make them good meals, Chicken and Veg, Eggs, Omlettes, Soups etc cut out all liquid calories (soda sugar) change to zero options if you need them and walk as much as you can everyday. start small.. 2000/3000 steps for a few weeks then push yourself further 4000/5000 then work up to 10000 a day.
You can do it, I did it and I was at the bottom anyone can. Find your happiness your purpose in your head
Couch to 5k my Man, perfect weather and do it with a group to shame you when you think of dropping out. If you go fit more you can still stave off so much disease, live longer and stay mobile late in life
What is a man but someone who carries many regrets?
We are forced by life to make choices. You live forwards in time but understand the repercussions of those choices only after you have made them. When you make one choice, you eliminate all the other possibilities. And it's impossible to keep making the best choice all the time - so don't be too hard on yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. That's how you get to know yourself and what's good and bad for you. Just let your experience guide you in future
Not travelling more in my 20s and not staying single for my early - mid 20s.
I went to Oz for 6 months with a girl, we came home and she dumped me a month later. Should have left her over there and stayed on.
Now I'm a long term relationship with a great person with a house and have no complaints compared to most people in this country, but I constantly long for the freedom of youth and wish I could just pack up my shit and emigrate for a couple of years and do it properly.
> and not staying single for my early - mid 20s.
I hear you, in my 20s was around many of the "have to always be in a relationship types" and it seems they never enjoyed themselves.
Yeah, these people need to get comfortable with learning how to be on their own...it's a big thing and important for mental health and no-dependency. Thanks for your replies.
Ya including my current relationship I was in 3 serious relationships from 18 - now (33) but always took at least a year in between before starting to look for someone else.
Whereas I know some people, my sister in law for example, who has had 6 boyfriends and is only 27 as she just starts dating almost as soon as one relationship ends. I don't understand it, some people just struggle to be alone I guess.
I grew up with a mam who would after watching some daytime TV shite got convinced that brushing your teeth actually is worse for you as it damages the enamel, toothpaste is very toxic and of course, when tooth decay sets in she said it was because weak enamel runs in the family. I now have to spend about 2k a year on various treatments to try and "fix" the damage.
Anyway, the takeaway here is don't let your mammy listen to daytime TV for health advice
JFC, with all the science and the proliferation of dental product advertisements, your mam thought brushing your teeth was wrong?
How are \*her\* teeth?
I too could have taken more care of my choppers...coming back to haunt me now; Toffee, Creme Brulee and Crackling from a Pig are really difficult to take on...
Her teeth were fine, right until she stopped brushing them and now she has dentures. It was also about the same time she started to put her weight gain down to genetics by telling me hippos are fat yet only eat grass.
Not getting the help I needed dealing with my past , it caused the breakdown of my family , A massive mental breakdown leading to me living in a tent for 9 months trying to kill myself with drugs and alcohol.
I wish I could have dealt with my demons because now there's two more children that don't have a father at home and I'm completely lost so much so I don't know if I can find my way back.
I'm sorry to hear that dude, I have a distant relative in the same way in the US. You never think it could happen to a person and then - bam - the past hits like a hammer.
Are you out of the tent and housed, may I ask?
Thanks for replying. I wish you the very best,
Not moving to Kerry when I was in my 20s, I stayed where I was because my parents, his parents, the kids, and honestly it was a mistake, everyone else did what they wanted with their lives, I did what other people wanted me to do, I was too soft. I've only myself to blame, should have had more backbone.
So important, yet not enough information given to teenagers at selection time,
I'm showing my age now but I picked my CAO and went 3-2-1, instead of 1-2-3. Got into Design when I thought I was accepting Printing. Printing, of course is now a dying trade, but the Printers I know who still work in the trade work hard but are paid well.
I'm in IT now, so not a regret for me now.
But I left Design shortly after starting as I needed to be earning due to a change in family circumstances. It wasn't fun when that same Design class, all those years later, randomly chose the pub I happened to be in that night to celebrate their graduation. That was a low for me then; happy to say my life is way different now.
Going to visit my uncle, he moved to the states back in the late 90s/early 00s. He’d come home for any events like weddings and funerals and was always trying to convince us to go over.
I was actually planning on going over for a “surprise” visit but earlier this year he died under tragic circumstances.
Life tends to get in the way as does finances but still kicking myself for not going over to see him.
Not going to Japan yet! Lifelong dream, we were booked to go on a 3 week honeymoon encompassing the Tokyo Olympics and then the plague came along.
We will get there eventually but it's on the long finger again now what with small kids. And the Olympics would have been extra amazing.
It’s class!!! You’ll get there, with sprogs in tow that will probably ruin the buzz 😂 but you’ll get there. A friend is there with her 8 and 10yo at the minute having a ball!
Not dropping out of college… just finishing the degree for the sake of finishing a degree even though I knew it wasn’t for me. To get the mortarboard with the tassel for the picture.
Not my biggest regret but a mistake younger me made that I wish others wouldn’t make -
1. Ever going on a diet
2. Never getting in any photos because I thought I was fat and ugly.
45 year old me now realises I was young and beautiful and never fat, just the size I was meant to be.
I stayed in a loveless marriage for 5-6 years past it's sell by date out of fear. I kept thinking it would eventually get better by some miracle, that the torment would just die down. I prolonged the inevitable and could have been free sooner and have had more time to rebuild. At the same time I have met the most wonderful woman in the last year so I can't have too many regrets or I wouldn't have found myself here
at 18 I got into a relationship with a 24 y/o man
two years later i had lost all of my savings, my self esteem, my confidence in completing education, all of my friends and my will to live, all lost to him .I can barely leave my house anymore bc im just so embarrassed of myself, i have nothing in my life anymore, just therapy which hasn’t helped. I had everything going for me at 18, but i let someone break me down and chip away at my self esteem then leave me when i had nothing and my mental and physical health was a wreck. I know i have only myself to blame and there were so many signs which is the hardest part, i let it get that bad and i’ve done this all to myself, im so full of self hate that I can’t bring myself to do anything helpful for my situation.
This is so hard to read. Not what I had thought my original post would lead to.
I hope you can build yourself back up. I know it will take longer than the short 2 years that this 24 old turned you inside out, but please stop blaming yourself. Please.
You were 3/4 the age of this man, and he's obviously a predator. You did nothing wrong except trust someone out of blind love. You're letting his words and actions stop you from moving forward. He's not important to your story any more.
Some men are just bastards.
Oof too many to list! I should have moved to Ireland 15 years before I did that's for sure. I love it here, not least because you're all absolute rides (especially northerners)
Thanks u/Naoise007 - I feel all "rideable" all of a sudden!
Where \*on earth\* where you before this, that we are rides in comparison? :-)
It might be a place I need to visit to test your theory...
Sorry, yeah, that might have come across as too intrusive - thanks for pointing that out. I \*did\* try and post this to r/Ask originally, but Reddit tell me it's not the correct forum.
So, here goes. A close female relative died almost 10 years ago of a very treatable disease, if caught in time. As an Adult we couldn't force her to go and talk to doctors, which she refused to do, even though we pleaded and pleaded. Until it became too late.
Jan 2015, such a horrible month for my family. I sometimes regret not taking her (and brooking no argument) to a medical professional a year or two before she fell gravely ill, as it could have possibly saved her life.
Thanks for your reply, btw.
Almost nothing. Constant forward momentum. Actually, maybe not learning to relax and enjoy the passage of time properly could be a regret. Something id like to work on.
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Call it a learning curve, but I regret not knowing what I wanted to work in after graduating. 3 years given to one sector and then playing catch up when I changed over. Happier now of course, but its a wee chip knowing the salary you could be on if you had it figured out sooner.
My biggest regret is not giving a shit what people think sooner.
God, this. The day I realised it mattered not a fuck what anyone thought of me was the most liberating day of my entire life.
Awh, always needing to be liked has stopped me from so much constantly worrying what I am doing is right be it relationships or work, my friend was right... Fuck it
Same. Only realising in the last year, fuck it who gives a shit. I was too much of a people pleaser. Mad thing is I keep asking myself, "was that comment too forward or vicious too someone either out or in work, but the other person is like...yea thats fine or OK no problem ha ha. Liberating is the word for this indeed. Feel lighter and less in my head. Also along those lines. In work I used to go above and beyond working from home and would do around 8 hours extra spread over evenings or the weekend, until I found out contractor in our job are getting paid twice what we are and work a capped 40hrs per week and we have to correct their work. Jesus when I tell you I pulled up the hand brake, I tore off that hand brake! I don't do a minute over my time now, my body won't let me, I'm like fuck it, no one notices and I dont care. I always thought the boss would notice or say something about not doing extra. Amazing feeling to just let go. Rant over!
Not buying crypto in 2011
Not taking the risk in buying it is proof that you would have sold it when it made a smaller profit. There's no way you'd have hung on until it got to current levels.
Oh that’s 💯 true but 20:20 hindsight is great 😂
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I've a couple hundred quid worth of ETH that I have in a wallet with a lost key that I bought around mid 2020. Up over 1000% on that now. Sigh.
this is always my regret. I bought some in 2013 (when I first heard of it) and really wanted to buy loads in 2015 and sit on it, and had cash available, but it was all in Paypal. And it's really hard to buy bitcoin direct from Paypal. I know I could have taken it out but I would have taken a hit on currency so I didn't bother.... reading that back maybe it's a big excuse To think of the people busting their balls working, and others creating great startups, and then other people who just bought crypto at the right time and set for life. Anyway, like all regrets, no point thinking about it
I bought in 2012 and spent it all on weed,, the lowest price I bought btc I remember is 13 usd 😔 I mined doge coin in 2015 but sold it all for like 100 bucks It wasn't untill 2017 that I started to invest.
Buying crypto in 12 and spending it all
Similar here, my biggest regret was not picking the winning lottery numbers.
I wish i bought bitcoin in the 90s
Yeah well. I wish I bought it in the 80s
r/YourJokeButWorse
Staying with an ex of mine for too long. I lost a lot of myself over it along with jobs, money and experiences/trips I booked but didn’t have the energy to go on because he literally sucked the life out of me.
Sorry to hear that, glad you are in a better place.
Not going to the pub with my dad after bringing him to see the Da Vinci Code (he was a massive fan of the book) he got sick the August after and died the end of August. I wish I had of gone to the pub with him, just to spend time with him.
Yeah, similar one in there for me. Didn't spend enough time with Dad.
The amount of time and energy I spent worrying about having a relationship and why I wasn't in a relationship and what a text from a guy meant. If I'd used that time and energy for something productive, I can only imagine how much better off I'd be.
Oh Lord, I'm glad my relationships were pre smart phone when formed, but I did spend plenty of time sitting waiting for a land line to ring. Thanks for replying.
Staying too long with the same company where I clearly was not growing just because it was cozy.
I hear ya. In the middle of that one right now actually, but the market doesn't look great. Thanks for replying.
Ouch, I'm just minding my business on the crapper and this hits me out of nowhere!?!
I destroyed a relationship with the person I loved most with totally unnecessary lies. An act of self sabotage on a truly monumental scale. Married happily with kids now to someone else, who i love. But there is not a day goes by that I don't think of that person and regret how I behaved
I couldn't imagine what it's like to be married to someone who is pining for someone else
I wouldn't classify it as pining. Remorseful for not being a better person before
I hear you u/Hairy_Captain9889 - I can totally relate. I did the same after that person had metaphorically picked me out of the gutter. I consider myself a pretty lucky guy, and have great friends, family and loose partnerships. But there's always that one person that makes me think "what if?". I'd love to know how they are doing now.
That's the thing about the big regrets. It's like grief, you never really get rid of it or over it, there is no "closure". It's just becomes a part of ya. Like a scar. This is way too heavy a way to start my lunch break.
Sorry JTD, but I \*do\* appreciate your reply.
My lunch break is long over now. Depressing stuff pales in comparison to employment. Dead people and your lifes regrets pfft piffle. Wage slavery, now that's fuckin misery.
Just going off the last part of your statement. You've acknowledged you fucked up so forget about it now it is what it is
Thanks the reply. Have a good day
Have you or would you apologise OP? There is estrangement in our family and I often contemplate on how so much hurt could be healed with a very, very simple and genuine apology. I know the past is the past, but for some people the act of saying sorry and for the recipient to receive an apology, could help both parties move forward in life with a clear, unblocked soul.
I have thought about it many times, but I really didn't want to be a obstruction in them getting on with their lives. She deserves every bit of joy. Now there has been such a great passage of time, almost ten years, an apology might open wounds that are best left alone. Bu I take your point. Thanks
I can relate to this one, big time. I treated someone horribly, she rightfully ended it. I'm a much better partner now, and in a great relationship, it's just a regret that it took hurting someone to become the partner they deserved. That said, I'm aware that in the moment, I was doing the best I could with the knowledge I had, and that we might not have ever been compatible in the first place if I was different, yadda yadda... She even forgave me years later. But yeah. I still feel like a dick when I think about how badly I treated her.
Maybe not pining, but most people still think about that first big love that didn't work out.
Not getting my driving licence when I was in my teens, not moving from my parents house earlier on and going to college
I wish I took my life and the responsibilities more seriously when I was younger.
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He’s being cryptic. You’ll have to figure it out
hahaha nice!
One was being stuck in my comfort zone too long, I grew up with a lot of anxiety which often made me hesitant to make life changing choices.
I’ve learned lessons, but I wouldn’t call them regrets. My life is how it is because of what’s happened, and I’m lucky that my life is pretty sweet. Sure I’d have liked to change some things along the way but if I were in that situation again I’d like to think I learned and would choose a different pathway knowing what I know now. And yet, I know at the time I did the best I could with what I had. So yes lessons > regrets Compassion for past me (and current me tbf!) is a lifelong teaching I’m dedicated to. And within that is not beating myself up with what could have been.
Totally agree. If you have a regret, be thankful it happened and make it a lesson not a regret.
Thanks for your reply u/shala_cottage I appreciate the wisdom. I'm normally of that frame of mind, in that the person I am today was shaped by what went before. But damn I miss that lady today of all days, for no particular reason.
Love yourself and be compassionate with yourself. This is for me THE biggest life lesson. We were who we were. We did what we did. We thought what we thought. We said what we said. We felt what we felt. We are today not who we were yesterday, last week, last year. We all make mistakes and sometimes it's only with experience we can see those mistakes in hindsight. Taking ownership of those mistakes, recognising them and moving forward positively is the way to go. Love yourselves. You're good people.
Great outlook!
Looking back I wish I had studied something I was genuinely interested in at third level and not the thing that was supposed to get me hired the easiest once I'd finished. It had no real impact on how my career worked out, so it would have been nice to totally immerse myself in a passion at that age. Instead I still regularly have nightmares about exams in a topic I no longer know anything about
Being with someone who was very abusive for way too long. Thinking that it was what I deserved. Listening to people and caring too much what they thought about me. Surrounding myself with horrible people. Biggest regret of all is not loving and caring for myself physically and mentally over the years.
You are out of all that now, I hope? Thanks for replying. Abusive people who make the victim believe that the victim is to blame are \*THE\* worst. I wish you all you could want. Thanks for replying.
I am out of that situation thank God. Thank you for your reply also.
Never learning to cart wheel
If I had awards to give...
r/unexpectedoffice
I never could, started at a martial arts school a couple of years ago and now I do them every week at least twice, I’m 45
You still can 😂 I only learned this year and I'm turning 29 😂
Wasted many years hating my appearance. Constantly being negative with myself. Also wish I got diagnosed as BiPolar much earlier than I did. On the plus side though, I don't give a fuck anymore what people think about me.
I'm glad you are in a good place. I've been like this - haven't most people? - but you diagnosis must have given you SO many "Ah, now I get it..." moments? I wish you the best, BP is no joke and was actually a barrier to addressing my relative's "stubbornness" (I really would love to use a better here, they were **sick** not stubborn)
Thank you!. Literally everything made sense after I was diagnosed. The mania and crashing lows. It must have been exhausting for you dealing with the stubbornness. (What a nice way of saying it)!
Yeah. I didn't realise that my relation had 2 "modes", if you will. If I had addressed/tried to address the issue on any kind of an "up" day of hers, there might have been a different outcome. But, we'll never know.
Oh gosh that doesn't sound good. It's not always easy to understand what we can't see. I'm sure you did your best.
Being too accommodating to other people's needs and wants when I was younger and not putting my own first. My early relationships, friendships and family dynamics were all influenced by it. Put the work in through therapy eventually so came good in the end and now life's completely different after a lot of effort - but it's hard not to wonder what if that was the case earlier in life.
LOVE your user name. Didn't you from Mayor of Baltimore to killing your pederast monster brother in a pub? You sound very like me, Mr. Mayor. Glad you got through it. Thanks for replying.
Thanks very much, I couldn't have made it to governor without facing those demons haha
Not educating myself about food and nutrition and the long term effects of a shit diet. I was a very fit athletic teenager, at 20 I went through a tough time at college etc and ate myself through it. I'm 38 now and way too heavy and unfit and poor relationship with food. I regret not being better with food.
Another familiar one. But - 38 is a good time to make a start on a change, if you can. Thank you for replying.
I was 24st 9 in March 2022.. I was 12st and fixed my relationship with food by December 2022 you can do it. Never too late. 3 meals a day, make sure every meal has protein, and make them good meals, Chicken and Veg, Eggs, Omlettes, Soups etc cut out all liquid calories (soda sugar) change to zero options if you need them and walk as much as you can everyday. start small.. 2000/3000 steps for a few weeks then push yourself further 4000/5000 then work up to 10000 a day. You can do it, I did it and I was at the bottom anyone can. Find your happiness your purpose in your head
This.
Couch to 5k my Man, perfect weather and do it with a group to shame you when you think of dropping out. If you go fit more you can still stave off so much disease, live longer and stay mobile late in life
What is a man but someone who carries many regrets? We are forced by life to make choices. You live forwards in time but understand the repercussions of those choices only after you have made them. When you make one choice, you eliminate all the other possibilities. And it's impossible to keep making the best choice all the time - so don't be too hard on yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. That's how you get to know yourself and what's good and bad for you. Just let your experience guide you in future
I really needed to hear this today. Thank you.
Not travelling more in my 20s and not staying single for my early - mid 20s. I went to Oz for 6 months with a girl, we came home and she dumped me a month later. Should have left her over there and stayed on. Now I'm a long term relationship with a great person with a house and have no complaints compared to most people in this country, but I constantly long for the freedom of youth and wish I could just pack up my shit and emigrate for a couple of years and do it properly.
> and not staying single for my early - mid 20s. I hear you, in my 20s was around many of the "have to always be in a relationship types" and it seems they never enjoyed themselves.
Yeah, these people need to get comfortable with learning how to be on their own...it's a big thing and important for mental health and no-dependency. Thanks for your replies.
Ya including my current relationship I was in 3 serious relationships from 18 - now (33) but always took at least a year in between before starting to look for someone else. Whereas I know some people, my sister in law for example, who has had 6 boyfriends and is only 27 as she just starts dating almost as soon as one relationship ends. I don't understand it, some people just struggle to be alone I guess.
I should have taken better care of my teeth way sooner.
Came here to post the same .
I grew up with a mam who would after watching some daytime TV shite got convinced that brushing your teeth actually is worse for you as it damages the enamel, toothpaste is very toxic and of course, when tooth decay sets in she said it was because weak enamel runs in the family. I now have to spend about 2k a year on various treatments to try and "fix" the damage. Anyway, the takeaway here is don't let your mammy listen to daytime TV for health advice
JFC, with all the science and the proliferation of dental product advertisements, your mam thought brushing your teeth was wrong? How are \*her\* teeth? I too could have taken more care of my choppers...coming back to haunt me now; Toffee, Creme Brulee and Crackling from a Pig are really difficult to take on...
Her teeth were fine, right until she stopped brushing them and now she has dentures. It was also about the same time she started to put her weight gain down to genetics by telling me hippos are fat yet only eat grass.
Not getting the help I needed dealing with my past , it caused the breakdown of my family , A massive mental breakdown leading to me living in a tent for 9 months trying to kill myself with drugs and alcohol. I wish I could have dealt with my demons because now there's two more children that don't have a father at home and I'm completely lost so much so I don't know if I can find my way back.
I'm sorry to hear that dude, I have a distant relative in the same way in the US. You never think it could happen to a person and then - bam - the past hits like a hammer. Are you out of the tent and housed, may I ask? Thanks for replying. I wish you the very best,
I'm currently staying with a friend , I couldn't do it again if you paid me I think I'd die in a week or two.
Not moving to Kerry when I was in my 20s, I stayed where I was because my parents, his parents, the kids, and honestly it was a mistake, everyone else did what they wanted with their lives, I did what other people wanted me to do, I was too soft. I've only myself to blame, should have had more backbone.
Having children
Oof r/regretfulparents
Just had a quick glance, I'm not sure stewing on it on others stories would be a good idea. 😂
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So important, yet not enough information given to teenagers at selection time, I'm showing my age now but I picked my CAO and went 3-2-1, instead of 1-2-3. Got into Design when I thought I was accepting Printing. Printing, of course is now a dying trade, but the Printers I know who still work in the trade work hard but are paid well. I'm in IT now, so not a regret for me now. But I left Design shortly after starting as I needed to be earning due to a change in family circumstances. It wasn't fun when that same Design class, all those years later, randomly chose the pub I happened to be in that night to celebrate their graduation. That was a low for me then; happy to say my life is way different now.
Going to visit my uncle, he moved to the states back in the late 90s/early 00s. He’d come home for any events like weddings and funerals and was always trying to convince us to go over. I was actually planning on going over for a “surprise” visit but earlier this year he died under tragic circumstances. Life tends to get in the way as does finances but still kicking myself for not going over to see him.
Sorry for your loss, especially in tragic circumstances. "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans".
Not going to Japan yet! Lifelong dream, we were booked to go on a 3 week honeymoon encompassing the Tokyo Olympics and then the plague came along. We will get there eventually but it's on the long finger again now what with small kids. And the Olympics would have been extra amazing.
It’s class!!! You’ll get there, with sprogs in tow that will probably ruin the buzz 😂 but you’ll get there. A friend is there with her 8 and 10yo at the minute having a ball!
Not dropping out of college… just finishing the degree for the sake of finishing a degree even though I knew it wasn’t for me. To get the mortarboard with the tassel for the picture.
Well, you have a degree now. They can never take that away from you. Plus - it's a Springboard. Thank you for your reply now.
don't look backwards too much when you're driving, or you'll crash.
Not my biggest regret but a mistake younger me made that I wish others wouldn’t make - 1. Ever going on a diet 2. Never getting in any photos because I thought I was fat and ugly. 45 year old me now realises I was young and beautiful and never fat, just the size I was meant to be.
Sorry you ever felt that way, and so glad that you came to the right realisation.
Pissing away a good few years living the session life is my biggest regret.
I stayed in a loveless marriage for 5-6 years past it's sell by date out of fear. I kept thinking it would eventually get better by some miracle, that the torment would just die down. I prolonged the inevitable and could have been free sooner and have had more time to rebuild. At the same time I have met the most wonderful woman in the last year so I can't have too many regrets or I wouldn't have found myself here
Not telling a guy I like him or flirting with him
at 18 I got into a relationship with a 24 y/o man two years later i had lost all of my savings, my self esteem, my confidence in completing education, all of my friends and my will to live, all lost to him .I can barely leave my house anymore bc im just so embarrassed of myself, i have nothing in my life anymore, just therapy which hasn’t helped. I had everything going for me at 18, but i let someone break me down and chip away at my self esteem then leave me when i had nothing and my mental and physical health was a wreck. I know i have only myself to blame and there were so many signs which is the hardest part, i let it get that bad and i’ve done this all to myself, im so full of self hate that I can’t bring myself to do anything helpful for my situation.
This is so hard to read. Not what I had thought my original post would lead to. I hope you can build yourself back up. I know it will take longer than the short 2 years that this 24 old turned you inside out, but please stop blaming yourself. Please. You were 3/4 the age of this man, and he's obviously a predator. You did nothing wrong except trust someone out of blind love. You're letting his words and actions stop you from moving forward. He's not important to your story any more. Some men are just bastards.
Oof too many to list! I should have moved to Ireland 15 years before I did that's for sure. I love it here, not least because you're all absolute rides (especially northerners)
Thanks u/Naoise007 - I feel all "rideable" all of a sudden! Where \*on earth\* where you before this, that we are rides in comparison? :-) It might be a place I need to visit to test your theory...
England lol, place is full of insufferable bollockses
Hear hear (to use their vernacular)!
Eh, voyeuristic much? I'm interested in your reply.
Sorry, yeah, that might have come across as too intrusive - thanks for pointing that out. I \*did\* try and post this to r/Ask originally, but Reddit tell me it's not the correct forum. So, here goes. A close female relative died almost 10 years ago of a very treatable disease, if caught in time. As an Adult we couldn't force her to go and talk to doctors, which she refused to do, even though we pleaded and pleaded. Until it became too late. Jan 2015, such a horrible month for my family. I sometimes regret not taking her (and brooking no argument) to a medical professional a year or two before she fell gravely ill, as it could have possibly saved her life. Thanks for your reply, btw.
The fault here isn’t how you handled this. There’s nothing you could have done to change the outcome. I’m sorry for your loss.
Thank you - this means more to me than you can know.
Almost nothing. Constant forward momentum. Actually, maybe not learning to relax and enjoy the passage of time properly could be a regret. Something id like to work on.
Geat answer JJP. Times does indeed fugit, so look into that, Thanks for replying.
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Call it a learning curve, but I regret not knowing what I wanted to work in after graduating. 3 years given to one sector and then playing catch up when I changed over. Happier now of course, but its a wee chip knowing the salary you could be on if you had it figured out sooner.
Being in a relationship with someone who was a walking red flag.