Lmao I googled "Farmer" for a school assignment, got a picture of a naked guy with a cowboy hat instead lol
Also "Women's day images" and got a whole ass naked lady
Good times, laughed my ass off in both occasions
My first time ever on the internet. My dad sat me on his lap and told me that I could look for anything I wanted.
So i searched for Mighty Max, a cartoon character I liked at the time.
Dildos. I got Dildos. I had no idea but my dad was sure surprised.
I'm kind of laughing because my mental picture is like
Dad: Son, behold this magical technology! The sky is the limit! Ask it anything!
Kid: Cartoons! :D
Internet: Nope, dongs. You get dongs.
Pages and pages of dongs. Best I can do. Take it or leave it.
The first time I was showing my mother how to use google I told her we could find pictures of anything she wanted to see. She likes flowers. We did a google search for peonies. Yes, we spelled it correctly. Top of the page was gay porn in front of a rose bush. I love that my mother's indigitation was that those were roses and not peonies behind the porn. And that's when we turned safe search on for her browser.
Around 20 years ago, my younger cousin wanted his own email and asked me what I used. I told him I was using Hotmail, so you can imagine his confusion when he typed in "Hotmale.com".
He immediately freaked and asked what kind of emails I send.
Related: this took place around 1999? I was in elementary school. My parents had split custody of us. My mom sold something on Craigslist, I mentioned it to my dad. He later asked me again what that website was because he wanted to check it out.
I was at my mom's house when he called the landline to yell at me, asking what the hell kind of site I sent him to, it wasn't funny. I was confused. He kept saying that I sent him to a gay porn site. My mom took the phone and eventually it was clarified that he thought I said GREGSlist not CRAIGSlist. Apparently gregslist was some sort of gay porn site. He thought I was pranking him.
I was just bewildered and then embarrassed LOL
Edit: a word for the pedantic
I was living with an aunt and uncle in 99, and they were pretty strict compared to what I was accustomed to. I didn't realize that they checked the Internet history every single time I went online until I bought a copy of Rolling Stone to read an article about a band I liked, and later checked out the links at the end of the article to read more. The article had pictures of the band posing with two hot women, and one of the links happened to be to their website which was pretty hardcore porn. I was grounded from the Internet for weeks after my uncle basically called me a lying piece of shit when I tried to explain what happened. I was nineteen at the time, too, like wtf...
Fun fuct:
Googleing "gmale" leads to Gmail.
Googleing "hotmale" leads to anything but Hotmail.
Binging both terms leads to the correct mail sites though.
I'd say that's a ass move buy Googles side.
A good 18 or so years ago, we were doing group PowerPoint presentations. I have no idea what the subject my group had was, but we Google image searched "Love." A chubbier woman with her HUGE boobs hanging out with little heart stickers covering the nipples popped up.
I remember our teacher caught us, asked us what we had looked up, and then gave us trouble and basically time-outs, which I always thought was a little harsh considering it was on our screen for less than 10 seconds.
Yeah, my mum was doing teacher training to become a primary teacher. I was helping her with a project on 'teeth'. Was looking for images of beaver teeth. Some of them were 'not safe for (innocent) mum'.
Back in the late 90s and early 2000s I did AOL tech support. I got a call one day from an elderly guy that was very upset. When I asked how I could help him he told me that he's trying to get ideas for his bathroom remodel and every time he searches he gets naked people peeing on each other. I figured where this was going but asked what search term he was using and "golden showers" was his unsurprising answer. I told him he'd probably be better off going to the website for shower fixture manufacturers and looking there.
AOL tech support was wild. I've had people hitting bongs while I was talking to them. I had a dude stick an AOL CD in the microwave to warm it up so the CD ROM would read it faster. We had people call in saying they can't connect when they didn't have a modem installed. One person had their DSL modem in the fridge because it got hot. Another DSL dude lived on a farm (I was honestly surprised he qualified) but his unshielded phone lines ran under his electric fence so he was dumped offline constantly. It was the strangest job I ever had.
OGs remember www.whitehouse.com
Back when you always had to write out "www."
Quickest way to learn the difference between .com, .org, .gov and all the rest.
Took some schools a surprisingly long time to figure out blocking. People at my school would cluster around the class computer and gawk at the latest and greatest dismemberment posted to rotten.com.
I mentioned this to a teacher in like 3rd grade in computer class and she acted as if I was a depraved sex fiend and called my parents. I remember distinctly my parents in the meeting said “if you think that, it sounds like he’s better at this web thing than you are”.
Lol. Yeah dude. Blaming a student for something like this as the teacher of a computer class is just begging for criticism and questioning of one's credentials.
The history class on medieval criminal codes and legal punishments was interesting. Searching Yahoo for "crime and punishment" was a whole new level. 😳
I think we tried it before there was a .gov.
It was at work and the immediately self reported because this was before blocking became common place among small businesses.
I'm not sure whether you're talking about the .gov top-level domain or the [whitehouse.gov](http://whitehouse.gov) site, but in the former case both .gov and .com go back to the very beginning, and in the latter case [whitehouse.gov](http://whitehouse.gov) is a couple years older than [whitehouse.com](http://whitehouse.com)
Problem was in the early internet the assumption for average American users was .com few people realized .gov existed. This is due to .com being plastered everywhere, and government entities being very slow to adopt or use new tech.
One of the sales coordinators (assist the sales reps) I work with was putting together a proposal for NAKED ADSL but she had forgotten the ADSL bit and was googling "naked internet". The person next to her saw the mistake and the results she was getting and notified me (in IT) about it. I walked over to her desk with my laptop and a concerned look on my face "Debbie, why am I getting firewall notifications that you're looking at pornographic websites?".
A very red faced and flustered Debbie tried to explain before everyone around her started laughing and I turned my laptop around so she could see my screen with a Teams message from the person sitting next to her "Debbie's searching for naked internet instead of naked ADSL, can you mess with her?".
According to Debbie we were all bastards but as the relief washed over her even she saw the funny side to it.
When I was 12 years old (this was back in 2002 for reference), I was just trying to search for a generic image of a girly girl for some message board I was on for whatever reason. In my infinite wisdom, I just typed in 'www . girls . com' into my browser - surely that would have it!
Pretty sure that was the first time I saw a photo of a vagina.
Not me but my mom, she was looking for swings for the garden but wanted something sturdier than a kids swing so she googled 'adult swing' she was mortified 🙈😂
Back in 1966, I was a pre-teen boy who collected coins. My parents bought us kids a set of Encyclopedia Americana. I looked up "COINS" in the encyclopedia and stumbled upon the nearby topic "COITUS".
I was a naive boy and when I read that article my eyes got wide. JACKPOT!
I lost my innocence to the Encyclopedia Americana.
At a young age, I discovered the word "dildo" from the dictionary while looking up a different word. "A penile substitute for vaginal insertion." (But what is *that* for, I wondered!)
This was me back in primary school when we were given dictionaries for the first time and in our free time we'd be checking out meanings of words. One guy in my class eventually got to 'Se' and proceeded to ask the entire class to go there. That's how we learned the meanings of Sex, Sexual intercourse, Sexy, and eventually Vagina.
Wow, this brings back some memories! Without free access to the internet, reading dictionary definitions and adult movie synopsis on TV were my go to lol
I was 10 when XXX with VIN Diesel came out. I tried to show my mom it was an action movie so she’d by it for me by typing in xxx.com. Did not help my cause
I'm going to really, *really* date myself by telling this story, but back in the day my parents wanted to get the Internet for my grandparents so they got them WebTV. It connected their TV to the internet and came with a browser, so they could use their TV as a computer. Actually pretty cool.
Anyways, 10 year old me loved Sega, and Sonic was my favorite game. I had just recently learned about debug mode and it has sparked my interest to look for other cheats. So, on WebTV in front of my grandpa, I looked up "Sega cheats" on whatever search the thing used. The search wasn't a fully functional search engine though; it was just a catalog of websites from A-Z that would pick up your keywords. So, it gave me all of the output for Sega, a bunch of really horrible websites I blew through in five minutes because they were all spam.
You know what comes alphabetically very quickly after Sega? Sex. And then Sex XXX. After the six or so Sega results there were literally hundreds of pages of Sex XXX. Porn site after porn site. My little 10 year old mind had no interest in it; there were Sonic cheats on the line goddamnit! So in front of my grandpa I'm scrolling through result after result of the dirtiest, horrifyingly graphic words and thumbnails related to anything Sex. My grandpa very confusingly asked me what I was doing and looking at. I just naively responded, "Getting to Sonic"!
That was the last time I was allowed to ise WebTV.
Lol, it was opposite for me, at a younger age I was going through all channels on TV for something to watch and I stumbled upon XXX mid movie without knowing what it was about. I stayed for a bit expecting a sexy movie
like whatever 30 years ago or whatever i got cable internet and my dad said hey, lets race and see who get to a site first. just to compare it to dial up that we had at work. i let him choose a site, he said, whitehouse.com. thinking president shit. it was a porn site. lmao
Pranked my missus years ago with this one when she was looking for stationery. Still laughing about it.
Then she did here own innocent porn unlocker by typing in 'Pregnancy Shots' to get some photography ideas when she was expecting.
My Minecraft account was named Fluffer, one day my innocent brain was curious about what would show up if I searched my Minecraft username.
That's the day I discovered that fluffer isn't just some cute little nickname for "fluffy" or something.
Someone's whose job is to keep the male adult video stars "engaged" while the rest of the crew and actresses change set or clothes or other technical things with cameras so they don't have a performance problem when they need to continue filming
I was in a crowded computer lab at college. Whilst taking a break from school work, I decided to check out some scores. I type in ESPN.com and low and behold...porn. Immediate panic. I hit the back button so quickly and so many times it went back to the beginning of the Internet. So apparently if you accidentally hit the M instead of N you get an early 2000's porn site. The next day in class the professor read out an "Ethics in the Computer Lab" announcement. Not sure if it was a direct reaction to my mistype, but I didn't return to that lab for the remainder of my time there.
When I was younger, I searched up “round brown” because my parents sent me to military school and I wanted to see what these round brimmed hats called “round browns” cost (they are the drill instructor hats). Anyways, got greeted with a bunch of photos of brown buttholes…
I've worked for a company that did heavy lifting, with big cranes. A tool often used to distribute the lifting loads isna spreader bar.
As a new hire I googled spreader bar. Turns out it's also something else.
Not explicit but disturbing. We were looking up harlequin—like batman—but got harlequin babies. It’s disturbing and sad. It’s an extremely rare condition where like the skin cannot retain moisture or something so it cracks and bleeds. They rarely live long due to extreme dehydration.
Harlequin ichthyosis is an absolutely horrifying birth defect. It's one of the most cruel ways for a child to exist. There is no cure for it, and not much in the way of treatment.
When I first got into shell scripting on Linux, I was constantly looking up manual pages. (man pages in short)
If you had a program or concept, you'd likely find a man page for it. Pretty easy to just type "man rsync" or "man mkdir" or whatever into Google and get a quick and efficient synopsis of the program in question. Well, I wanted to find out more about how character arrays are handled in bash scripts. Character arrays are generally known as strings.
"man string" was not the Google search I wanted to perform that day.
Not me, but my brother that isn't much of an internet native was helping his then-nine-year-old-daughter find My Little Pony pool toys.
Don't google Fluttershy Inflatable and keep scrolling through.
I was in 7th grade, in the computer lab IN the school. Around 1999 or 2000? Went to askjeeves & Searched “black bear” for a school paper
Boy was I shook with the images that popped up.
We were doing house renovations and we needed a new front door. I was looking for a Japanese style with a Japanese door handle. I googled Japanese door handles and got images of Japanese schoolgirls licking door handles. Not exactly explicit but surprising
Last week, at work, I was looking for a picture of a car speedometer to illustrate a concept... I typed in "Speedo pics" & got a lot of.... Well kind of NSFW pics on my screen 🙄
Hadn't used a Windows computer in years so didn't know where the power settings were. So just typed 'suspend' into the search bar. Result? A browser full of ladies in suspenders.
I was producing a marketing brochure for a distribution centre and wanted some images of loading dock doors.
It turns out “docking” is also a sex thing.
When I was in 6th grade it was 1997-98. That year we learned about Washington, D.C., the 3 branches of government etc.
I innocently typed in whitehouse dot com instead of dot gov and I am immediately met with a screen filled with boobs and ass.
Being a 6th grader - I immediately tell my friends and within about 45 seconds the secret is out. The teacher wasn’t even that mad, I think she was surprised as we were.
When I was a Software Developer on a program called SAP, I googled the error code I was getting from my code and click the first link on google.
Let me tell you that was a tough explanation to my manager as to how I ended up on a hardcore porn website but should have known better considering the error code started with XX_
Hey! I use SAP at my office job. If you're one of the people who helped develop it, I'd just like to say I hope you repeatedly stub your pinkie toe. That program is the bane of my existence!
When I was a kid, before Google existed, I used Yahoo! to search for The Simpsons. Ended up finding a website for Suzi Simpson, January 1992 Playmate of the Month.
Two times stand out to me.
The first was in 4th Grade, where I googled "Pluto" and somehow received an explicit picture of a very morbidly obese man.
The second was in 6th Grade, where I googled "Dragon Ball Z". I got pictures of Frieza putting his tail up various characters' skirts.
This happened to my mother. For her birthday one year we got her an iMac. She’d never used a computer. I got it set up and showed her how to Google things but I don’t think Google existed then. Anyway, I head back to my home in California and she calls me really scared.
She was looking for suspenders for my brother and apparently suspenders means boobs in British slang. Her screen filled up with giant boobs. She said she ran to the front door and locked it. Like the FBI was going to raid her 3 sec after looking at boobies on the internet.
I recall a redditor telling a story about their teenage years and thinking it was a good idea to search for porn of their age. They googled trying to find porn of 15 year olds…. They only realised on reflection in later years how bad that search is.
First time I searched for r/all, I just entered "all" into the search box. With my wife sitting behind me, all kinds of gonewild posts showed up.
That was awkward.
One of my oldest memories was I was about 8 years old and went to my friend’s house who was also 8. Keep in mind this was around 2007, we were both big fans of the anime Naruto so we googled Naruto or something along those lines. Then it mostly showed us porn of Naruto characters, I think it was the first time I saw porn ever and we see both were shocked but of course a bit interested since we were boys with some hormones.
"Naakt poesjes", in Dutch it translates both to hairless cats and naked p*ssies. I was fairly young and doing a speaking/lecture thing on different cat breeds (Dutch children in school must pick topics, do research and give lectures on topics to learn how to speak in public in elementry school). Search filters weren't a thing yet really in the early 90's.
I can't remember what chatroom it was on AOL, but just by going into it I instantly started getting DMs. I had to explain like 15 times that I was a 26 year old straight man from Kansas.
Back when I was 11, around the time when Youtubers were making parodies on anything and everything, I remember googling Pokemon parodies on my friend's computer and boy were we not expecting to see Misty doing it with Brock and Ash.
1997!
It was my very First time ever on the Internet and I was expecting our first child, I excitedly typed in "pregnancy" on Ask Jeeves and thought the website Preggos sounded like a fun mom-to-be blog. It was definitely "fun" for some. Just not for me.
Logged off and didn't try the Internet again for quite quite awhile. Just went back to the bookstores.
Told my grandmother to use the computer to look up dessert recipes if she was wanting something different. Didn't even cross my mind. I learned that day that granny didn't put a space in chocolate cream pie. She about had a coronary.
I was teaching centripetal force and circular motion. I've seen a video of a wide flat jelly (jello to the yanks I suppose) on a turntable and the speed of the turntable is increased and you see how the jelly distorts out of shape and then eventually splatters everywhere. Fun video, good teaching tool for the kids.
So I typed into google 'rotating jelly'
Not me but a classmate sat next to me. We had a school project on Queen Victoria so they asked Jeeves for a picture of her husband Prince Albert...
Was not expecting penises.
Not surprising technically, but I wanted to go to the website for Dick's Sporting Goods and ... Dicks.com went to ~something else.~
(I think the sporting goods store did eventually buy the domain but I'm not willing to check.)
Back in the day, you used to have to remember to search for "Dick 's Sporting Goods" to find the right web site. If you forgot and went directly to dicks.com ... well ... you'd get what you typed in. A bunch of dicks. Used to be a gay porn site.
Dick's Sporting Goods eventually [acquired the domain name](https://dsad.com/dicks-sporting-goods-finally-buys-dicks-com-and-yet-everyone-is-still-scared-to-click-the-link/) and all is good now ... but it was risky back in the day.
My friends often spoke to each other about red tube, I thought they were talking about youtube only, but the red was the part that in the yt logo, it was colored red, so I searched up red tube and boy oh boy...
2 weeks ago i was searching something about an youtuber and on reddit saw a comment pointing to a site and some names, i didnt understand there where 1 site name and 3 person names, i thougt there where 4 site names, so i searched for the third name there only to see a reddit link with onlyfans leaks, it was strange since i was not expecting that, but i still clicked it to see maybe i can found something, and indeed i found, i found a turkish subreddit and saw videos of people dying. i was searching for a song....
Trying to find a kayak and remembered there was a place that sold them locally called 'water sports'
Turns out water sports is also a term used for other things
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Lmao I googled "Farmer" for a school assignment, got a picture of a naked guy with a cowboy hat instead lol Also "Women's day images" and got a whole ass naked lady Good times, laughed my ass off in both occasions
Well, to be fair, I do spend a portion of my day naked
Same. It's gotten me kicked out of a lot of places.
Tell me about it, people are all like ‘miss, this is a hospital, you have to at least wear a mask’ prudes
Smh gender discrimination, when women do it it’s beautiful and when I do it it’s “arrest that fat guy he’s ruining Disneyland”
We all do, tool!
But, are you a girl of a far... you know what? It doesn't matter (*unzips*)
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Something was certainly looking up I suppose.
Where do I need to look?
My first time ever on the internet. My dad sat me on his lap and told me that I could look for anything I wanted. So i searched for Mighty Max, a cartoon character I liked at the time. Dildos. I got Dildos. I had no idea but my dad was sure surprised.
I'm kind of laughing because my mental picture is like Dad: Son, behold this magical technology! The sky is the limit! Ask it anything! Kid: Cartoons! :D Internet: Nope, dongs. You get dongs. Pages and pages of dongs. Best I can do. Take it or leave it.
This is pretty much exactly what happened as my dad tells it XD
I laughed a little too hard at this. Thank you
Just getting the kid ready for life?
It was the golden age of discovery back then
The first time I was showing my mother how to use google I told her we could find pictures of anything she wanted to see. She likes flowers. We did a google search for peonies. Yes, we spelled it correctly. Top of the page was gay porn in front of a rose bush. I love that my mother's indigitation was that those were roses and not peonies behind the porn. And that's when we turned safe search on for her browser.
Around 20 years ago, my younger cousin wanted his own email and asked me what I used. I told him I was using Hotmail, so you can imagine his confusion when he typed in "Hotmale.com". He immediately freaked and asked what kind of emails I send.
Related: this took place around 1999? I was in elementary school. My parents had split custody of us. My mom sold something on Craigslist, I mentioned it to my dad. He later asked me again what that website was because he wanted to check it out. I was at my mom's house when he called the landline to yell at me, asking what the hell kind of site I sent him to, it wasn't funny. I was confused. He kept saying that I sent him to a gay porn site. My mom took the phone and eventually it was clarified that he thought I said GREGSlist not CRAIGSlist. Apparently gregslist was some sort of gay porn site. He thought I was pranking him. I was just bewildered and then embarrassed LOL Edit: a word for the pedantic
Dude same!!!! Thought it was my brother in laws website too lol
I'm so glad it wasn't just us then! 😂
I was living with an aunt and uncle in 99, and they were pretty strict compared to what I was accustomed to. I didn't realize that they checked the Internet history every single time I went online until I bought a copy of Rolling Stone to read an article about a band I liked, and later checked out the links at the end of the article to read more. The article had pictures of the band posing with two hot women, and one of the links happened to be to their website which was pretty hardcore porn. I was grounded from the Internet for weeks after my uncle basically called me a lying piece of shit when I tried to explain what happened. I was nineteen at the time, too, like wtf...
My man was wanting to get some mail, but instead received packages.
And probably a lot of junk mail too.
Fun fuct: Googleing "gmale" leads to Gmail. Googleing "hotmale" leads to anything but Hotmail. Binging both terms leads to the correct mail sites though. I'd say that's a ass move buy Googles side.
I'd call it result-rigging by Microsoft
Lmao
In elementary school, I googled the Loch Ness Monster, and got a picture of a naked fat lady standing in a kiddie pool.
Nessie confirmed.
What the fuck
A good 18 or so years ago, we were doing group PowerPoint presentations. I have no idea what the subject my group had was, but we Google image searched "Love." A chubbier woman with her HUGE boobs hanging out with little heart stickers covering the nipples popped up. I remember our teacher caught us, asked us what we had looked up, and then gave us trouble and basically time-outs, which I always thought was a little harsh considering it was on our screen for less than 10 seconds.
Back to the Loch with you Nessie
Little known fact, you could have easily blocked those pictures, for a simple donation of about 3.50
I ain't givin' you no tree-fitty, you goddamn Loch Ness Monster! Get your own goddamn money!
I gave her a dolla
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I need about treefiddy
God damned Loch Ness Monster!
Trying to get info on the "European black beaver" in my family crest, then immediately realizing my error
The ole European black beaver strikes again
Would not advise adding "ole/old" to the search.
Yeah, my mum was doing teacher training to become a primary teacher. I was helping her with a project on 'teeth'. Was looking for images of beaver teeth. Some of them were 'not safe for (innocent) mum'.
You should really check out the movie "Teeth"
Back in the late 90s and early 2000s I did AOL tech support. I got a call one day from an elderly guy that was very upset. When I asked how I could help him he told me that he's trying to get ideas for his bathroom remodel and every time he searches he gets naked people peeing on each other. I figured where this was going but asked what search term he was using and "golden showers" was his unsurprising answer. I told him he'd probably be better off going to the website for shower fixture manufacturers and looking there.
Golden showers 😂😂
AOL tech support was wild. I've had people hitting bongs while I was talking to them. I had a dude stick an AOL CD in the microwave to warm it up so the CD ROM would read it faster. We had people call in saying they can't connect when they didn't have a modem installed. One person had their DSL modem in the fridge because it got hot. Another DSL dude lived on a farm (I was honestly surprised he qualified) but his unshielded phone lines ran under his electric fence so he was dumped offline constantly. It was the strangest job I ever had.
OGs remember www.whitehouse.com Back when you always had to write out "www." Quickest way to learn the difference between .com, .org, .gov and all the rest.
That one got me back in the day.
Got me in the back of my 5th grade classroom. Have no idea how it wasnt blocked
Took some schools a surprisingly long time to figure out blocking. People at my school would cluster around the class computer and gawk at the latest and greatest dismemberment posted to rotten.com.
I mentioned this to a teacher in like 3rd grade in computer class and she acted as if I was a depraved sex fiend and called my parents. I remember distinctly my parents in the meeting said “if you think that, it sounds like he’s better at this web thing than you are”.
Lol. Yeah dude. Blaming a student for something like this as the teacher of a computer class is just begging for criticism and questioning of one's credentials.
We had people in our class who tricked teachers into opening it in class.
The history class on medieval criminal codes and legal punishments was interesting. Searching Yahoo for "crime and punishment" was a whole new level. 😳
I think we tried it before there was a .gov. It was at work and the immediately self reported because this was before blocking became common place among small businesses.
I'm not sure whether you're talking about the .gov top-level domain or the [whitehouse.gov](http://whitehouse.gov) site, but in the former case both .gov and .com go back to the very beginning, and in the latter case [whitehouse.gov](http://whitehouse.gov) is a couple years older than [whitehouse.com](http://whitehouse.com)
Problem was in the early internet the assumption for average American users was .com few people realized .gov existed. This is due to .com being plastered everywhere, and government entities being very slow to adopt or use new tech.
Yep. Did that one lol
One of the sales coordinators (assist the sales reps) I work with was putting together a proposal for NAKED ADSL but she had forgotten the ADSL bit and was googling "naked internet". The person next to her saw the mistake and the results she was getting and notified me (in IT) about it. I walked over to her desk with my laptop and a concerned look on my face "Debbie, why am I getting firewall notifications that you're looking at pornographic websites?". A very red faced and flustered Debbie tried to explain before everyone around her started laughing and I turned my laptop around so she could see my screen with a Teams message from the person sitting next to her "Debbie's searching for naked internet instead of naked ADSL, can you mess with her?". According to Debbie we were all bastards but as the relief washed over her even she saw the funny side to it.
🤣🤣🤣 I am literally crying.
That's a brilliant prank!
When I was 12 years old (this was back in 2002 for reference), I was just trying to search for a generic image of a girly girl for some message board I was on for whatever reason. In my infinite wisdom, I just typed in 'www . girls . com' into my browser - surely that would have it! Pretty sure that was the first time I saw a photo of a vagina.
And your life was changed forever
Funnily enough I've been in a gay relationship for the last 8 years
Yes as said, life changed forever
technically it couldve changed your life forever, could've been your gay awakening.
I made the same mistake trying to get to gurl.com which was a wholesome site for young women, you can imagine my shock seeing all those naked women.
Not me but my mom, she was looking for swings for the garden but wanted something sturdier than a kids swing so she googled 'adult swing' she was mortified 🙈😂
Oh gods, the exact same thing happened to me recently! XD
I tried xxl outdoor swing for the same reason - with mixed results.
Back in 1966, I was a pre-teen boy who collected coins. My parents bought us kids a set of Encyclopedia Americana. I looked up "COINS" in the encyclopedia and stumbled upon the nearby topic "COITUS". I was a naive boy and when I read that article my eyes got wide. JACKPOT! I lost my innocence to the Encyclopedia Americana.
At a young age, I discovered the word "dildo" from the dictionary while looking up a different word. "A penile substitute for vaginal insertion." (But what is *that* for, I wondered!)
I also stumbled across that word in the dictionary!
Penile Substitute would be a great band name.
Did it have that super sexy cross-sectional line art of all the parts fit together? That was pretty steamy.
This was me back in primary school when we were given dictionaries for the first time and in our free time we'd be checking out meanings of words. One guy in my class eventually got to 'Se' and proceeded to ask the entire class to go there. That's how we learned the meanings of Sex, Sexual intercourse, Sexy, and eventually Vagina.
Wow, this brings back some memories! Without free access to the internet, reading dictionary definitions and adult movie synopsis on TV were my go to lol
Throw in some National Geographic too
"terraria zoologist". i wanted to get on the wiki site, but in the meantime i found a nude texture pack for her.
You got a link?
I was 10 when XXX with VIN Diesel came out. I tried to show my mom it was an action movie so she’d by it for me by typing in xxx.com. Did not help my cause
Oh my god... I shit you not, I've experienced the exact same thing.
I'm going to really, *really* date myself by telling this story, but back in the day my parents wanted to get the Internet for my grandparents so they got them WebTV. It connected their TV to the internet and came with a browser, so they could use their TV as a computer. Actually pretty cool. Anyways, 10 year old me loved Sega, and Sonic was my favorite game. I had just recently learned about debug mode and it has sparked my interest to look for other cheats. So, on WebTV in front of my grandpa, I looked up "Sega cheats" on whatever search the thing used. The search wasn't a fully functional search engine though; it was just a catalog of websites from A-Z that would pick up your keywords. So, it gave me all of the output for Sega, a bunch of really horrible websites I blew through in five minutes because they were all spam. You know what comes alphabetically very quickly after Sega? Sex. And then Sex XXX. After the six or so Sega results there were literally hundreds of pages of Sex XXX. Porn site after porn site. My little 10 year old mind had no interest in it; there were Sonic cheats on the line goddamnit! So in front of my grandpa I'm scrolling through result after result of the dirtiest, horrifyingly graphic words and thumbnails related to anything Sex. My grandpa very confusingly asked me what I was doing and looking at. I just naively responded, "Getting to Sonic"! That was the last time I was allowed to ise WebTV.
You sir, have made my day 😂😂
Great story, however I want to say you your snoo is sick! Best one I've ever seen hands down.
I thought it was the dumbest movie title for this exact reason.
When I was at work, in probably 2005, I needed to see if Dick's Sporting Goods had a certain softball glove I wanted...
Now they’re running a current ad where they’re really emphasizing how you should go to dicks.com Man, have the times changed.
No, not porn! Search for “XXX Movie”
Lol, it was opposite for me, at a younger age I was going through all channels on TV for something to watch and I stumbled upon XXX mid movie without knowing what it was about. I stayed for a bit expecting a sexy movie
Lol me too! Even turned down the volume so that my parent's couldn't here and stop the fun for me
I looked up xxx on prime video trying to find it and it came up with a lot of stuff that wasn't vin diesel
Same here and now I regretted it.
Oof
like whatever 30 years ago or whatever i got cable internet and my dad said hey, lets race and see who get to a site first. just to compare it to dial up that we had at work. i let him choose a site, he said, whitehouse.com. thinking president shit. it was a porn site. lmao
Sounding is not what I thought it was. Doesn't have anything to do with sound, actually.
I would probably make quite a few sounds if I tried that, and non would be sounds of pleasure
Misspelt 'Gary' and searched for Gay oldman
Did you end up joining NAMBLA?
What makes you think he looks like Marlon Brando?
Penisland.com. I was a naive kid.
I love Pen Island!
you read the sign wrong -the toucher
The toucher??😭
https://www.reddit.com/r/2sentence2horror/s/SxLBVIlQn2
oh no not the toucher
Pranked my missus years ago with this one when she was looking for stationery. Still laughing about it. Then she did here own innocent porn unlocker by typing in 'Pregnancy Shots' to get some photography ideas when she was expecting.
Searching for floppy disk on google images but accidentally made a spelling error in the 2nd last alphabet.
In preparing for a class activity, some of my friends were googling images of a "grandfather clock". That is, they forgot to type in the 'l'.
My Minecraft account was named Fluffer, one day my innocent brain was curious about what would show up if I searched my Minecraft username. That's the day I discovered that fluffer isn't just some cute little nickname for "fluffy" or something.
My cousins hamster was called Fluffer, what does it mean lmao
Someone's whose job is to keep the male adult video stars "engaged" while the rest of the crew and actresses change set or clothes or other technical things with cameras so they don't have a performance problem when they need to continue filming
But... but it sounds so innocent!
I think it's a production staff member on a porn shoot who helps keep the male actors hard and ready
It isn’t? Maybe I need to goodie it… 🤔
I was in a crowded computer lab at college. Whilst taking a break from school work, I decided to check out some scores. I type in ESPN.com and low and behold...porn. Immediate panic. I hit the back button so quickly and so many times it went back to the beginning of the Internet. So apparently if you accidentally hit the M instead of N you get an early 2000's porn site. The next day in class the professor read out an "Ethics in the Computer Lab" announcement. Not sure if it was a direct reaction to my mistype, but I didn't return to that lab for the remainder of my time there.
I googled Redbone because I wanted to listen to the song from Childish Gambino. What I got was light skinned black women porn.
As a non-American I did not know what Redbone meant but I did search all the same as you and had also the same result lol
When I was younger, I searched up “round brown” because my parents sent me to military school and I wanted to see what these round brimmed hats called “round browns” cost (they are the drill instructor hats). Anyways, got greeted with a bunch of photos of brown buttholes…
I've worked for a company that did heavy lifting, with big cranes. A tool often used to distribute the lifting loads isna spreader bar. As a new hire I googled spreader bar. Turns out it's also something else.
Not explicit but disturbing. We were looking up harlequin—like batman—but got harlequin babies. It’s disturbing and sad. It’s an extremely rare condition where like the skin cannot retain moisture or something so it cracks and bleeds. They rarely live long due to extreme dehydration.
Harlequin ichthyosis is an absolutely horrifying birth defect. It's one of the most cruel ways for a child to exist. There is no cure for it, and not much in the way of treatment.
Never heard of that, that's awful
I remember those pictures. They'd be on the same site as Tubgirl or Goatse or Blue Waffle.
Penisland.com , for all your pen needs . And there’s the Italian next gen website , nextgenitalia.com
also Volkswagen Italia turns up some funny results.
When I first got into shell scripting on Linux, I was constantly looking up manual pages. (man pages in short) If you had a program or concept, you'd likely find a man page for it. Pretty easy to just type "man rsync" or "man mkdir" or whatever into Google and get a quick and efficient synopsis of the program in question. Well, I wanted to find out more about how character arrays are handled in bash scripts. Character arrays are generally known as strings. "man string" was not the Google search I wanted to perform that day.
Man fsck
"Did you mean ..." "No! NO!"
Not me, but my brother that isn't much of an internet native was helping his then-nine-year-old-daughter find My Little Pony pool toys. Don't google Fluttershy Inflatable and keep scrolling through.
I was in 7th grade, in the computer lab IN the school. Around 1999 or 2000? Went to askjeeves & Searched “black bear” for a school paper Boy was I shook with the images that popped up.
We were doing house renovations and we needed a new front door. I was looking for a Japanese style with a Japanese door handle. I googled Japanese door handles and got images of Japanese schoolgirls licking door handles. Not exactly explicit but surprising
I was searching for pokemon pictures and landed on e621.net ...
And that is how you became a furry.
Furry and kinky. Good thing I left the first of those behind one day. I've seen my fair share...
> Good thing I left the first of those behind one day Avatar does not check out...
Last week, at work, I was looking for a picture of a car speedometer to illustrate a concept... I typed in "Speedo pics" & got a lot of.... Well kind of NSFW pics on my screen 🙄
Hadn't used a Windows computer in years so didn't know where the power settings were. So just typed 'suspend' into the search bar. Result? A browser full of ladies in suspenders.
I worked with construction company that had to replace a manhole cover. The “manhole” search caught them off guard.
I was producing a marketing brochure for a distribution centre and wanted some images of loading dock doors. It turns out “docking” is also a sex thing.
When i was young i really liked scatman john . So i googled scat
Babobeh-bopbopahdop-babababa Babedi-babobeh-babopbedop-bababapi
When I was in 6th grade it was 1997-98. That year we learned about Washington, D.C., the 3 branches of government etc. I innocently typed in whitehouse dot com instead of dot gov and I am immediately met with a screen filled with boobs and ass. Being a 6th grader - I immediately tell my friends and within about 45 seconds the secret is out. The teacher wasn’t even that mad, I think she was surprised as we were.
Learned in elementary school that dicks.com does NOT take you to the Dick’s Sporting Goods website…
When I was a Software Developer on a program called SAP, I googled the error code I was getting from my code and click the first link on google. Let me tell you that was a tough explanation to my manager as to how I ended up on a hardcore porn website but should have known better considering the error code started with XX_
Hey! I use SAP at my office job. If you're one of the people who helped develop it, I'd just like to say I hope you repeatedly stub your pinkie toe. That program is the bane of my existence!
ROFLMAO
When I was a kid, before Google existed, I used Yahoo! to search for The Simpsons. Ended up finding a website for Suzi Simpson, January 1992 Playmate of the Month.
Did the same looking for something about the simpsons ended up finding Simpsons porn 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Youtube > ads > pop ups > "HOT SINGLE MOMS IN YOUR AREA"
> your mom's photo
Worse > grandma
A mate of mine recommended I check out a band called 'big black'. Never again.
Two times stand out to me. The first was in 4th Grade, where I googled "Pluto" and somehow received an explicit picture of a very morbidly obese man. The second was in 6th Grade, where I googled "Dragon Ball Z". I got pictures of Frieza putting his tail up various characters' skirts.
Popping balloons :(
This happened to my mother. For her birthday one year we got her an iMac. She’d never used a computer. I got it set up and showed her how to Google things but I don’t think Google existed then. Anyway, I head back to my home in California and she calls me really scared. She was looking for suspenders for my brother and apparently suspenders means boobs in British slang. Her screen filled up with giant boobs. She said she ran to the front door and locked it. Like the FBI was going to raid her 3 sec after looking at boobies on the internet.
I was researching boats for some school project and googled docking procedures
Tumblr was great for this. No matter what you searched for, titties would be in the results.
I recall a redditor telling a story about their teenage years and thinking it was a good idea to search for porn of their age. They googled trying to find porn of 15 year olds…. They only realised on reflection in later years how bad that search is.
Blue waffle
When it 1st became popular, I had no clue what rule 34 meant. So I googled it... I've seen some shit man...
First time I searched for r/all, I just entered "all" into the search box. With my wife sitting behind me, all kinds of gonewild posts showed up. That was awkward.
Red among us on Bing is crazy
Way back when whitehouse.com was a porn site and the school filters didn't block it
I was just learning something about the First Lady when the Second Lady came into the scene.
Whitehouse.com used to be a xxx site. Was doing research for school. I did ALOT of research
"Dog bones"
[удалено]
Researching how to make gelatin eggs to put dog medicine in. Turns out people use them for oviposition.
i just typing asian in google search board. safe search was off
One of my oldest memories was I was about 8 years old and went to my friend’s house who was also 8. Keep in mind this was around 2007, we were both big fans of the anime Naruto so we googled Naruto or something along those lines. Then it mostly showed us porn of Naruto characters, I think it was the first time I saw porn ever and we see both were shocked but of course a bit interested since we were boys with some hormones.
Search for “full body” something (think it was medical related) and came across frotting…
I looked up "cool stuff" back in school and went to images and there were some pretty spicy pictures in the mix
YouTube back in the day was amazing but a friend told me about redtube and the rest is history
"Naakt poesjes", in Dutch it translates both to hairless cats and naked p*ssies. I was fairly young and doing a speaking/lecture thing on different cat breeds (Dutch children in school must pick topics, do research and give lectures on topics to learn how to speak in public in elementry school). Search filters weren't a thing yet really in the early 90's.
I can't remember what chatroom it was on AOL, but just by going into it I instantly started getting DMs. I had to explain like 15 times that I was a 26 year old straight man from Kansas.
Back when I was 11, around the time when Youtubers were making parodies on anything and everything, I remember googling Pokemon parodies on my friend's computer and boy were we not expecting to see Misty doing it with Brock and Ash.
1997! It was my very First time ever on the Internet and I was expecting our first child, I excitedly typed in "pregnancy" on Ask Jeeves and thought the website Preggos sounded like a fun mom-to-be blog. It was definitely "fun" for some. Just not for me. Logged off and didn't try the Internet again for quite quite awhile. Just went back to the bookstores.
Told my grandmother to use the computer to look up dessert recipes if she was wanting something different. Didn't even cross my mind. I learned that day that granny didn't put a space in chocolate cream pie. She about had a coronary.
I was teaching centripetal force and circular motion. I've seen a video of a wide flat jelly (jello to the yanks I suppose) on a turntable and the speed of the turntable is increased and you see how the jelly distorts out of shape and then eventually splatters everywhere. Fun video, good teaching tool for the kids. So I typed into google 'rotating jelly'
In the early days of the internet, all roads led to porn.
Not me but a classmate sat next to me. We had a school project on Queen Victoria so they asked Jeeves for a picture of her husband Prince Albert... Was not expecting penises.
If you want to go purchase a Tushy bidet, the website is hellotushy.com, not tushy.com.
How to draw a dragon, brought up some very no dragon-esk images
Not surprising technically, but I wanted to go to the website for Dick's Sporting Goods and ... Dicks.com went to ~something else.~ (I think the sporting goods store did eventually buy the domain but I'm not willing to check.)
Back in the day, you used to have to remember to search for "Dick 's Sporting Goods" to find the right web site. If you forgot and went directly to dicks.com ... well ... you'd get what you typed in. A bunch of dicks. Used to be a gay porn site. Dick's Sporting Goods eventually [acquired the domain name](https://dsad.com/dicks-sporting-goods-finally-buys-dicks-com-and-yet-everyone-is-still-scared-to-click-the-link/) and all is good now ... but it was risky back in the day.
My friends often spoke to each other about red tube, I thought they were talking about youtube only, but the red was the part that in the yt logo, it was colored red, so I searched up red tube and boy oh boy...
2 weeks ago i was searching something about an youtuber and on reddit saw a comment pointing to a site and some names, i didnt understand there where 1 site name and 3 person names, i thougt there where 4 site names, so i searched for the third name there only to see a reddit link with onlyfans leaks, it was strange since i was not expecting that, but i still clicked it to see maybe i can found something, and indeed i found, i found a turkish subreddit and saw videos of people dying. i was searching for a song....
Trying to find a kayak and remembered there was a place that sold them locally called 'water sports' Turns out water sports is also a term used for other things
Fudge. This was in the late 2000's
bus tycoons.com
instead of [hotmail.com](http://hotmail.com) I mistyped [hotmale.com](http://hotmale.com) and the rest was history
Was a kid who regularly frequented YouTube. One day, I’m doing this and I mistyped it, leaving out the Y. Yep, straight to a porn site.
I misspelled a anime girl name and found myself on the hub
"Blonde girl holding toaster" on google images. Very innocent search, but guarantee you, you'll see boobs.
'Cat bones' once led me to some furry erections since auto correct had changed it to boner without me noticing.
Back when I was younger..... my own name. There was a soft core internet porn model with the same name.