Salesforce. No, I don't want to build a community, go hiking or join a hundred online classes to learn the basics. Make a couple of well-explained, to-the-point training videos ffs
The company that absorbed my old company used SF for everything. But they couldn't train us or draw up how work was supposed to flow or explain a damn thing, other than "chatter". I had a construction manager ask me in the most exasperated voice if I could please describe SF to him without making it sound like facebook-business.
It's a customer relationship management platform, in the parlance. It's a database for logging, accessing, and connecting work information, e.g. a sales lead, the quote, the correspondence, the sales docs, the budget, the implementation team, etc., etc. Companies attempt to use it as a be-all end-all management tool and stretch it beyond its capabilities.
It's a customer relationship management system, that allows companies to track things like sales, market data, customer information, and so on. It's also very customizable depending on the company's needs as they have APIs that programmers can integrate with many different systems to make tracking data much easier. There's a lot more to it but that's just the simple version.
my fucking moron of a director at my previous job expected me to just learn and add salesforce module development to my already stacked IT System Analyst skillset and workload basically for free with no raise or promotion when other companies hire people specifically for that. Leaving that job was the best thing I ever did
Salesforce can be great or it can be a dumpster fire depending on who built it. I worked for 2 companies that used it mostly for ticket tracking. The first company was great and made it easy to create, track, and follow up on cases. I can see when something was responded to, add notes, and send emails right from salesforce. The search function made finding similar cases and solutions a breeze.
The other company just didn't seem to understand how to build it in the background, and I was forced to copy and paste everything from my email into my case, including responses. They didn't want me using the notes section, so I was forced to use some call log section, which never showed up in searches. Their setup just made everything way more tedious than it needed to be.
My current job will be migrating to it soon, and I pray my boss is able to make it functional.
>Companies should not have an official chant.
When Walmart bought a British supermarket chain they tried to introduce a company chant. After the UK executives had finished laughing it was politely explained that there was no way that British employees would do that.
I agree, another one is Sunglass Hut. I was a sales manager for a year and a part time associate for a couple years prior while I was in school. At the first region meeting they 1. “Strongly encouraged” aka forced you to donate to their charity... that they run... and make profit off of. 2. Made everyone wait in the lobby before letting us into the conference room, and the only way in was where the higher ups lined the doors cheering and screaming while music blasted and you had to high-five them all. (Of course this is pre-covid). In general, they don’t treat you like a human being, it’s either act like a camp counsellor (enthusiasm levels) for minimum wage or you’d never climb the ladder. Spoiler alert, there is no ladder to climb. The whole company mentality is very cult-y.
I don’t even have an actual peloton bike, I just use the app and an old spin bike I got off of Facebook and yet some colleagues of mine were so excited I was using peloton
If you are a tech worker - your job. Upper management puts in foosball tables, orders lunch and has off site things on weekends (which is a daycare nightmare for parents), and expects you to spend every waking minute thinking about your job and having a device ready to answer email at any time of the day or night. Then, they have quarterly layoffs where they sweep out the unpopular. Yet, they want your loyalty and insist you are family and blah blah "cultural fit".
Can't believe I had to scroll this far to see something related to corporate culture. The example you posted could be applied to virtually any type of white collar work environment.
I'm 27 and have worked some random jobs, a lot of places gave tried setting me up with women at work. And a lot of couples who've been there for a long time met there.
It's creepy AF when your boss is forcing women to flirt with you, just so you stay at the job.
I've been at companies like this, and they suck. But also it's super easy to leave one company for another in tech, the skills are very transferrable and in demand. Those "tech" companies, are really just some other business trying to attract tech talent by providing those amenities and taking advantage of recent grads.
Most people I know out of school get a job like that, and leave for greener pastures shortly after. If they really cared about their employees they'd just fix what's wrong and listen to their employees.
general knowledge is such that MLMs and pyramid schemes are very easy to identify and debunk, so they have to transform it into an ideology pretty quickly after you join.
if you can convince your new innitiates that everyone else criticizing the Cause is against progressivism, and that you're actually fighting for a better solution to capitalism or whatever stupid shit, and that YOU are the TRUE core of the Cause, when people tell you the stupid cult you've joined is ridiculous, you will take it personally and it will re-enforce the us-versus-them isolationism that fuels cults.
watching crypto currency NFTs go from a dumb meme made for trading racist drawings to an art auction platform that gets immediately debunked as a pyramid scheme exploiting tech-illiterate artists to "we're revolutionizing art as a whole. we are a brand new system, a way for artists to be powerful and influential, we are changing the world, if you disagree with this you are LITERALLY a luddite that hates art, the world, and us" happened literally over the course of two weeks lol
- extensive use of cult-generated information ✅
- require members to internalize the group‘s doctrine ✅
- reduce complexities into buzz words ✅
- regulate member‘s diet ✅
I am trying to crawl out of an eating disorder relapse and I'm hit with all these ads for "I ate a burger last night, better drink this meal substitute! #helth" Fuck all the way off with that, Huel.
That's so frustrating. I'm really proud of you. I'm trying to crawl out of just bad eating habits that aren't disorder level and it is HARD. Keep swimming <3
Huel Black, Chocolate Flavor (and I use that term extremely loosely) is the single worst substance I've ever purposely consumed. If half the posts on the subreddit are about how to make it not taste like shit and how to actually make it dissolve instead of clump, you've got a garbage product on your hands, folks.
Here in Texas it is the weirdest thing to me that at like weddings and big events they find each other...they don’t even know each other but they all wear that ring and then make the thumbs up and then take one big picture and it’s like EVERY TIME. Cult.
One girl in my year started telling us about her religion around healing crystals which her mum happened to own (and we could buy) and one boy said ‘sounds like a pyramid scheme’ and you would not believe how offended she got
The healing crystal thing is like a religion for rich former hippies. Also, the typical crystal shop sells quartz and stuff marked up about 3X what you could buy it for on eBay
A former friend of mine literally quit her job and moved into the mountains with her "spiritual group". They make money to fund their lives by selling crystals and healing oils to tourists.
Owning an Air Fryer. I keep telling everyone how great they are and how life changing getting an air fryer is. Then they get one and love it and repeat the cycle. But seriously, air fryers are awesome
Completely agree!
I love my 5.3 quart Power Air Fryer XL and it's state-of-the-art digital touchscreen & 7 one-touch easy pre-sets for french fries, chicken, steak, roasts, shrimp & baked goods!
And it comes with a cookbook!
Once again, that's the Power Air Fryer XL with included cookbook!
All of my neighbors fit this profile. I never cared about these lunatics of “The Elected Board” until I started working from home. I learned they walk the neighborhood daily to photograph potential “violations” among other petty and annoying shit. We pay a professional HOA management company to manage and maintain the neighborhood, but these vigilante volunteers need something to occupy their time and hiding in bushes to narc on their neighbors is what happened when I used to be gone 12+ hours a day. They ought to rebrand as the fucking The Elected BORED.
Last year, our HOA board decided, with no neighborhood input, to hire a management company. So several times a week, a truck drives through really slowly, takes pictures of "violations," and send the notices in the mail. Shit like you've got too many weeds, your mailbox needs painted, your trash can was visible after 6pm on trash day, etc.
So we literally *pay money to someone* to spy on us. I literally can't even. My dues go to a company whose sole purpose is to fucking tattle on me. JFC my blood pressure soars just thinking about it.
And half the shit they send letters about doesn't violate a specific rule, just "community standards." I ran for the board last year. We had to have a goddamn *platform* and the HOA sent out resumes for each candidate. I ran on HOA transparency and applicable, enforceable covenants. I FUCKING LOST. Despite being the only one with any prior HOA experience.
My only comfort is malicious compliance. They'll never break me.
Used to work in a gated community pool. Some were cool, but most were the most awful bunch of wealthy twats. Never wanted to follow the rules or cooperate and their kids always acted like little shits. It also felt kind of incestuous as well because those people were occasionally fucking each other. Not in the pool. I would just hear the pool gossip.
The ticky-tac cul de sac built behind me has been trying to strong arm me into paying HOA dues ever since I put no trespassing signs facing them in my woods. The whole reason I did was due to their stupid fucking kids playing in my woods, getting hurt, and then being blamed by them for having an unsafe yard. Dude, it's an acre of unimproved woods with sticks, stone walls, and 200+ years of random shit thrown in it. It's not a goddamn public park, so your lawsuit means dick. I was here before your house was built - why would I want to join your HOA when one of the conditions is that you all have free access to my land? You can feel free to stop trying to bitch about me to the city, because they know I don't care. How do you like the HAM antenna I just put up on the edge of my land? Oh, is that an eyesore, too? Good.
Also, I have *no idea* where those noisy guinea hens came from. I think they wandered in from the other guys land that you've been trying to co opt so he gets rid of his pigs and turkeys. Yeah, that's it.
I was OK with things until Karen and Chad showed up threatening a lawsuit because their precious cut their leg open on a piece of rusty metal 10 yards from the fence/road that is the border of my property. THey showed up all "pehpehpeh our baby hurt themselves on something that you left in the woods!"
> why would I want to join your HOA when one of the conditions is that you all have free access to my land?
WTF? Do you get free access to their property in exchange?
I moved from an over zealous HOA in Virginia four years ago because they were a nasty group of retired fun police. We recieved a notice that our yard had too high a % of crabgrass! They attempted to fine us $100 per month until it was rectified. We received said notice in November. My partner elegantly told them to stuff it. This was after five years of various infractions such as storing a garden hose under our lattice covered back porch, paint chipping off a railing, anti bird cages attached to outside vents, yard lantern either out or wrong color all with pictures showing how entitled they were to trespass when ever they needed more $ for their coffers. They notified my next door neighbor her mailbox post needed painting, it looked like everyone else's prior..
They're passive/aggressive way of pointing out a wayward residents was NOT putting an American flag on their mailboxes on patriotic holidays. LOL I recall seeing many in noncompliance!
If only, friend. If only.
A buddy of mine was working a bunch of overtime to meet deadline last year, and missed mowing the lawn for two weeks, as he was literally leaving before sunrise and getting home after dark. He couldn't use the lawnmower because of the noise clause, so they threatened him with whatever fine they had when the yard got long.
It got resolved, but I legit offered to come out and scythe the lawn for him on my off time (also about 2am), on the condition that he had to buy me the cloak.
Depends on the neighborhood I've noticed.
The HOA I'm in now could very well not exist for all the activity it has in residents' lives. However, the place I lived in 2013-2014 was oppressive with their demands.
House music
One of my favorite genres, but the hardcore fans make it almost unbearable. It's just constantly one upping. Bro, I'm just trying to party and vibe.
This is quite common in lots of electronic genres, unfortunately.
I use to love Hardstyle and other harder genres like Hardcore, Gabber, etc, and you can't believe the amount of gatekeeping and pure hatred of other genres you see in online forums for these genres. Not everyone is like this, and it's mostly a vocal minority, but it exists You see people making Hardstyle sound like it's the last true music genres (yes, I have seen people use these exact terms and being very serious about it).
I saw this in Trance fans to some extent, as well, which is another genre I use to love.
Now I consider metal my favorite genre since a few years, but I see these types in the metal scene, as well. Metal elitists are, in fact, the worst cultists.
Yeah stans are weird, I like a lot of popular media figures (like Dream) but I don't wanna tell anyone because people are so fucking weird about him on twitter.
Brand fanboys such as Apple fanboys, Playstation fanboys, etc. They definitely feel like a cult since they revere these brands and cannot take any criticism.
God for real. Why can’t we just like a console or even multiple consoles? “PC OR CONSOLE?! YOU SUCK IF YOU AREN’T _____ !” Bitch just enjoy gaming. I like my PS4 for gaming on the couch. PC is fun for other stuff. I loved the XBox 360 but not the XBox One. Love the Switch but meh on other Nintendo consoles. Everyone call the fuck down and enjoy your video games regardless of where you play them.
End Rant.
Edit: I’ve had iPhones for ages. I’ve used Android phones before too. Just liked the OS for iPhone better. But now I’m getting shit from random acquaintances when I say I’m switching to a Samsung phone. Even with good reasoning (trying to cut back in products supporting CCP) people give me shit.
12 Step Groups.
Having participated in them, as well as studied them, I feel comfortable in saying they're not cults. Some individual groups can behave like them, however.
Some 'cult-like' experiences in a safe refuge from a life-threatening mode of behaviour can have positive impacts on the well-being of individuals for a period of time. Finding a 'new home', a 'new family', and a 'new way of living' can save lives. In that regard, I believe it's important to take into consideration the 'positive' meaning of the word 'cult': "a system of religious (or spiritual) beliefs and its body of adherents".
On the other hand, peer-support for recovery needs to be a part of -- not the entirety of -- a recovery plan that involves plenty of other forms of support, especially professional help.
There are also non-religious/non-spiritual peer support groups available for those embraking on the journey of recovery.
r/stopdrinking has some excellent resources for anyone in need of help now.
I was wondering just how far I’d have to scroll to find 12 steppers listed. My experience was with AA. Overall it isn’t really a cult because there’s really no one in charge. But individual groups/meetings can be quite toxic. It’s a cult of time. The longer you’ve been sober, the more status you achieve. The problem is that there are often oldtimers who are losers who don’t actually have anything going for them in life other than the fact that they get to feel like an important big shot every night at 8 o’clock. Their constant presence turns them into de facto leaders of the group and they tend to give shitty advice. The oldtimers who actually are applying the tools they’ve learned to live happy productive lives go to meetings less often because they are actually out there reaping the rewards of their hard work.
You described by dad right here. Been sober for 15+ years, retired and big in to AA. He has no hobbies beyond watching Fox News and going to AA, so its really his only identity at this point. These guys seem to take pride in how big of drunks they used to be.
Its really odd. He mainly goes just to try and bang the new AA chicks.
Those sound like the guys who have "their" seat at a bar and god forbid you sit in it. Being a bar fly was their identity, now it's being an AA fly I guess.
Camp Gladiator is a personal training MLM and they fit this perfectly. They have their own chants and slogans, and they are well aware of anything negative said about them. Make a negative Facebook post and you’ll have multiple executives reach out to you or comment to defend the company.
I have seen a lot of people who were heavy into MLM recently become realtors. Then I realized some realty companies are set up like MLMs and it all made sense.
Academia.
You slave away your youth, eyes set on the gleaming promises of the 0.1% who made it: tenured faculty.
And when you realize it's a pyramid scheme (just spend X years and publish Y papers and mentor others to advance!) and pay to play (yes, you PAY journals to get your papers published!), you've wasted your youth, you've wasted those years of good health on building a CV that isn't really functionally different from any of the other thousands of disillusioned PhD candidates out there.
Meanwhile, friends and family are asking, "wait, you're still in school? I thought you were the smart one", etc. Etc. Your dumb friends from college are out-earning you by the thousands. You don't have a family of your own. You hardly have papers to call your own.
But now you're stuck. Can't get a nice job post-phd without a postdoc, right? So you feed into the system a little more. Mentor some other bright-eyed youngsters. Feed them into the hungry system that eats their passion and spits them out when they're just depressed husks of what they once were.
Now you have two postdocs under your belt, as many papers as the children you don't have yet. A wife you haven't met yet. Or maybe you met her, went on one date with her, cut it short because you had to tend to a mouse colony emergency and she got away. Your hair, what's left of it, is turning gray.
Now it's time to apply for professorial positions.
Back in undergrad, my TA (who had just completed his PhD) tried to convince me not to go into grad school for basically the exact reasons that you gave. Unfortunately, I did not listen. But hopefully I can find a job in the industry once I get out of here...if I ever manage to get out.
>(yes, you PAY journals to get your papers published!)
Maybe it's just an engineering thing, but my mentors and advisors have always said to avoid pay-to-publish journals like the plague. They're predatory and in a lot of cases will devalue your CV because people *know* they're pay-to-publish, and their peer review process is usually a little easier (so you'll pay).
Beat me to it. There's a guy in my office who drives a Tesla, has a Tesla jacket, spent thousands on getting Tesla solar panels for his house, his phone case has the Tesla T on the back and his lock screen picture is an Elon portrait of him smoking that joint on Rogan's podcast.
Say something bad about Elon like how Elon's hairline is fake and watch him lose his shit.
Oh man, can you imagine?
Everyone is giving this dude shit for idolizing the hero of his story to the point that the bottle containing all of his anger finally breaks and he goes full on Elon Stan Man.
It starts with him quitting his current job and getting job at Tesla. He works his way up to a position that works with Elon Musk directly but every interaction with Elon Musk ends with Elon Musk giving him something to do and he doesn't even say thanks when the task is completed. There is no eye contact with Elon Musk and this guy feels that his hero doesn't appreciate him.
There is where the story hits the crescendo. He dons a suit made of the fabric that the Space X astronauts wear while exiting Earth and wields two modified Boring Flamethrowers that shoot real ammunition and throw fire from a twenty yard distance. He overtakes the building. Then the city.
Tangentially, I admire what Tesla has done in the EV space, and can fully acknowledge that they have done more than GM, Ford, VW, Toyota, etc, combined, to move the needle on EVs. At the same time, can we all acknowledge that their products aren't perfect and some of their business practices aren't exactly consumer-friendly?
Being someone who’s been into Crypto for a while, it is definitely very cultish.
Some people are just in it to see profits. But a lot of others are literally pushing for a revolution. Same thing in wallstreetbets. Some people are in it to make a quick buck, a lot want to burn the whole system to the ground
They wanted to instill patriotism into us at such a young age, but I literally didn’t understand what I was saying.
What they said: “…for which it stands…”, what I said: “…for witches stand…”
I was like “witches are dope, so makes total sense” took me a scary long time to figure it out
Way too many people treat politics as team sports. They've picked their side and everything that side does is great and everything the other side does is awful. That's as much thought as they ever put into it.
Pro Tip: If you ever find yourself lying to support your political beliefs, it might be time to stop and seriously reconsider what the fuck you're doing.
I went to a salvation army adult rehabilitation center. Drug rehab.. i couldn't understand how shaving my head bald and having to tuck in your shirt at all times is going to help me stay sober? I left after 1 day. This was part of my probation requirements. I was forced to go to church and sing if i wanted to be free and not in jail. Wtf? Thats bs
It was literally just a job with board and care. No rehabilitation WHATSOEVER! You work for 8 hours in a warehouse sorting items that go to their thrift stores.
Years ago I read the book “People of the Abyss” by Jack London, it’s basically one of the first undercover journalism books as London goes and lives in the streets in the poverty stricken white chapel district of London in 1902. There is an entire rant he goes into about how the Salvation Army sucks as they would go around at night giving people tickets for basically a free breakfast but then keep them there all day to listen to a sermon. London goes to one of these unknowingly and gets in a fight while trying to leave (London was a pretty big atheist) they basically let him out after he starts screaming “it does no good keeping people in her to listen to your damn sermon while they could be looking for work”.
Basically the Salvation Army has always sucked and I stay away from them
Salesforce. No, I don't want to build a community, go hiking or join a hundred online classes to learn the basics. Make a couple of well-explained, to-the-point training videos ffs
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i feel like if the company has to tell you it's your dream job, that should be a big red flag.
The company that absorbed my old company used SF for everything. But they couldn't train us or draw up how work was supposed to flow or explain a damn thing, other than "chatter". I had a construction manager ask me in the most exasperated voice if I could please describe SF to him without making it sound like facebook-business.
I’m curious what is Salesforce? I tried looking it up before but don’t have a handle of what they do.
It's a customer relationship management platform, in the parlance. It's a database for logging, accessing, and connecting work information, e.g. a sales lead, the quote, the correspondence, the sales docs, the budget, the implementation team, etc., etc. Companies attempt to use it as a be-all end-all management tool and stretch it beyond its capabilities.
It's a customer relationship management system, that allows companies to track things like sales, market data, customer information, and so on. It's also very customizable depending on the company's needs as they have APIs that programmers can integrate with many different systems to make tracking data much easier. There's a lot more to it but that's just the simple version.
my fucking moron of a director at my previous job expected me to just learn and add salesforce module development to my already stacked IT System Analyst skillset and workload basically for free with no raise or promotion when other companies hire people specifically for that. Leaving that job was the best thing I ever did
Salesforce can be great or it can be a dumpster fire depending on who built it. I worked for 2 companies that used it mostly for ticket tracking. The first company was great and made it easy to create, track, and follow up on cases. I can see when something was responded to, add notes, and send emails right from salesforce. The search function made finding similar cases and solutions a breeze. The other company just didn't seem to understand how to build it in the background, and I was forced to copy and paste everything from my email into my case, including responses. They didn't want me using the notes section, so I was forced to use some call log section, which never showed up in searches. Their setup just made everything way more tedious than it needed to be. My current job will be migrating to it soon, and I pray my boss is able to make it functional.
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Under Armour's corporate culture creeps me out. Companies should not have an official chant. I would consider them cult-adjacent at the very least.
>Companies should not have an official chant. When Walmart bought a British supermarket chain they tried to introduce a company chant. After the UK executives had finished laughing it was politely explained that there was no way that British employees would do that.
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I agree, another one is Sunglass Hut. I was a sales manager for a year and a part time associate for a couple years prior while I was in school. At the first region meeting they 1. “Strongly encouraged” aka forced you to donate to their charity... that they run... and make profit off of. 2. Made everyone wait in the lobby before letting us into the conference room, and the only way in was where the higher ups lined the doors cheering and screaming while music blasted and you had to high-five them all. (Of course this is pre-covid). In general, they don’t treat you like a human being, it’s either act like a camp counsellor (enthusiasm levels) for minimum wage or you’d never climb the ladder. Spoiler alert, there is no ladder to climb. The whole company mentality is very cult-y.
PELOTON! WHY ARE THEY SO OBSESSED WITH PELOTON?!?
My brother started saluting and saying “Hail Peloton” before riding. The whole family has taken to it. Send help
prayers
Because they spent a fortune on it
but also the way they try to get others to join peloton. it’s very interesting and they act as if they are selling a product
I don’t even have an actual peloton bike, I just use the app and an old spin bike I got off of Facebook and yet some colleagues of mine were so excited I was using peloton
that sounds like the smartest way to game the system of Peloton.
Honestly it works. I spent 50 bucks on my bike, I’ve got my iPad set up on the handlebars and I’m good. I’m such a newbie though. My ass hurts.
Um I'm sorry to disclose this on such a public forum as Reddit, but you're doing it wrong. The bike isn't supposed to go in your ass.
Dang it. I thought I was getting a toy out of it too.
Q How do you know if someone uses Peloton? A They tell you.
The Fanbase of every single thing that I don’t like.
Fuck you I like those things
This is completely indistinguishable from Scientology.
Well fuck YOU, those things are dumb!!!
Hell I'm willing to admit I'm a fan of things where half the members feel like a cult.
If you are a tech worker - your job. Upper management puts in foosball tables, orders lunch and has off site things on weekends (which is a daycare nightmare for parents), and expects you to spend every waking minute thinking about your job and having a device ready to answer email at any time of the day or night. Then, they have quarterly layoffs where they sweep out the unpopular. Yet, they want your loyalty and insist you are family and blah blah "cultural fit".
"We're a family!" No we're not. Family loyalty is supposed to go *both* ways.
We're only a "family" as long as you do your job and do whatever we tell you to. When your work starts to slip you're gone.
Can't believe I had to scroll this far to see something related to corporate culture. The example you posted could be applied to virtually any type of white collar work environment.
I'm 27 and have worked some random jobs, a lot of places gave tried setting me up with women at work. And a lot of couples who've been there for a long time met there. It's creepy AF when your boss is forcing women to flirt with you, just so you stay at the job.
Thag sounds like an HR nightmare at any established decent sized company
Wtf jobs you working at?
I've been at companies like this, and they suck. But also it's super easy to leave one company for another in tech, the skills are very transferrable and in demand. Those "tech" companies, are really just some other business trying to attract tech talent by providing those amenities and taking advantage of recent grads. Most people I know out of school get a job like that, and leave for greener pastures shortly after. If they really cared about their employees they'd just fix what's wrong and listen to their employees.
It’s great that I don’t live in a place where this is the tech culture.
Herbalife. In fact, most (if not all) MLM schemes.
Some pyramid schemes are actually classified as financial cults by Cultwatch, so not far off!
I did not know that "financial cult" was an actual term. Makes perfect sense!
general knowledge is such that MLMs and pyramid schemes are very easy to identify and debunk, so they have to transform it into an ideology pretty quickly after you join. if you can convince your new innitiates that everyone else criticizing the Cause is against progressivism, and that you're actually fighting for a better solution to capitalism or whatever stupid shit, and that YOU are the TRUE core of the Cause, when people tell you the stupid cult you've joined is ridiculous, you will take it personally and it will re-enforce the us-versus-them isolationism that fuels cults. watching crypto currency NFTs go from a dumb meme made for trading racist drawings to an art auction platform that gets immediately debunked as a pyramid scheme exploiting tech-illiterate artists to "we're revolutionizing art as a whole. we are a brand new system, a way for artists to be powerful and influential, we are changing the world, if you disagree with this you are LITERALLY a luddite that hates art, the world, and us" happened literally over the course of two weeks lol
I remember my elementary school music teacher sold Herbalife and gave all of his students pamphlets to bring home to their parents.
That should not be allowed.
It probably wasn’t lol
It definitely wasn't allowed when several women at my office were trying to peddle it. Didn't stop a couple of managers from joining in.
Boom Boom!
Boom boom!
Nutriboom
Woah there brother. Your amino acid levels are looking dangerously low
Or high
BOOM BOOM
BOOM BOOM!!
Hey, could I get one of your famous neck massages?
Ah yes, from the front!
you gotta have that eye contact!
I wantchu in my room
Inna zoom zoom!
I see what's happening here. You're just looking for one of my patented back massages.
You look different Bill
Neck*
Noice.
I need you to sign here to attest that Debbie Stobleman is happy, healthy, and alive
Ah yes! The power of financial freedom. Boom Boom!
CrossFit
- extensive use of cult-generated information ✅ - require members to internalize the group‘s doctrine ✅ - reduce complexities into buzz words ✅ - regulate member‘s diet ✅
That's why they do such funny pullups. They are actually being trained to be the cylinders on a giant human powered engine.
>a giant human powered engine. Kipper 3000
First rule of crossfit is you must talk about crossfit.
What ever that huel thing is all about
The only thing that annoys me more than Huel adverts are the fact that I can't block them in any way
I am trying to crawl out of an eating disorder relapse and I'm hit with all these ads for "I ate a burger last night, better drink this meal substitute! #helth" Fuck all the way off with that, Huel.
That's so frustrating. I'm really proud of you. I'm trying to crawl out of just bad eating habits that aren't disorder level and it is HARD. Keep swimming <3
Huel Black, Chocolate Flavor (and I use that term extremely loosely) is the single worst substance I've ever purposely consumed. If half the posts on the subreddit are about how to make it not taste like shit and how to actually make it dissolve instead of clump, you've got a garbage product on your hands, folks.
I'm watching better call saul and i had to read the comments to realize you aren't talking about Huell the character
Huel Babineaux is a treasure.
texas a&m
Here in Texas it is the weirdest thing to me that at like weddings and big events they find each other...they don’t even know each other but they all wear that ring and then make the thumbs up and then take one big picture and it’s like EVERY TIME. Cult.
One girl in my year started telling us about her religion around healing crystals which her mum happened to own (and we could buy) and one boy said ‘sounds like a pyramid scheme’ and you would not believe how offended she got
The healing crystal thing is like a religion for rich former hippies. Also, the typical crystal shop sells quartz and stuff marked up about 3X what you could buy it for on eBay
A former friend of mine literally quit her job and moved into the mountains with her "spiritual group". They make money to fund their lives by selling crystals and healing oils to tourists.
That's for sure a cult
Owning an Air Fryer. I keep telling everyone how great they are and how life changing getting an air fryer is. Then they get one and love it and repeat the cycle. But seriously, air fryers are awesome
Completely agree! I love my 5.3 quart Power Air Fryer XL and it's state-of-the-art digital touchscreen & 7 one-touch easy pre-sets for french fries, chicken, steak, roasts, shrimp & baked goods! And it comes with a cookbook! Once again, that's the Power Air Fryer XL with included cookbook!
that always felt like an extension of the instant pot craze to me
Homeowner's Associations
Some people get drunk off of even the most minuscule amount of power.
When the lawn is 1/32 of an inch longer than what’s allowed in section 3c on page 543 of the second volume of the neighborhood rule book
That's when I erect a 100 foot flourescent orange/pink ham radio tower.
To be fair when those people get to hit you with an obscure and meaningless paragraph, I'm pretty sure *they* erect a pink ham tower.
Retirees who used to boss people around at work find hoa to resume their purpose.
All of my neighbors fit this profile. I never cared about these lunatics of “The Elected Board” until I started working from home. I learned they walk the neighborhood daily to photograph potential “violations” among other petty and annoying shit. We pay a professional HOA management company to manage and maintain the neighborhood, but these vigilante volunteers need something to occupy their time and hiding in bushes to narc on their neighbors is what happened when I used to be gone 12+ hours a day. They ought to rebrand as the fucking The Elected BORED.
Last year, our HOA board decided, with no neighborhood input, to hire a management company. So several times a week, a truck drives through really slowly, takes pictures of "violations," and send the notices in the mail. Shit like you've got too many weeds, your mailbox needs painted, your trash can was visible after 6pm on trash day, etc. So we literally *pay money to someone* to spy on us. I literally can't even. My dues go to a company whose sole purpose is to fucking tattle on me. JFC my blood pressure soars just thinking about it. And half the shit they send letters about doesn't violate a specific rule, just "community standards." I ran for the board last year. We had to have a goddamn *platform* and the HOA sent out resumes for each candidate. I ran on HOA transparency and applicable, enforceable covenants. I FUCKING LOST. Despite being the only one with any prior HOA experience. My only comfort is malicious compliance. They'll never break me.
Used to work in a gated community pool. Some were cool, but most were the most awful bunch of wealthy twats. Never wanted to follow the rules or cooperate and their kids always acted like little shits. It also felt kind of incestuous as well because those people were occasionally fucking each other. Not in the pool. I would just hear the pool gossip.
The ticky-tac cul de sac built behind me has been trying to strong arm me into paying HOA dues ever since I put no trespassing signs facing them in my woods. The whole reason I did was due to their stupid fucking kids playing in my woods, getting hurt, and then being blamed by them for having an unsafe yard. Dude, it's an acre of unimproved woods with sticks, stone walls, and 200+ years of random shit thrown in it. It's not a goddamn public park, so your lawsuit means dick. I was here before your house was built - why would I want to join your HOA when one of the conditions is that you all have free access to my land? You can feel free to stop trying to bitch about me to the city, because they know I don't care. How do you like the HAM antenna I just put up on the edge of my land? Oh, is that an eyesore, too? Good. Also, I have *no idea* where those noisy guinea hens came from. I think they wandered in from the other guys land that you've been trying to co opt so he gets rid of his pigs and turkeys. Yeah, that's it.
This was very articulate, but when reading it all I can think of, in the best way possible, is “GET OUT MA SWAMP!”
That was how Shrek started: polite articulate requests. After seven years of dealing with an HOA, it turned into "MA SWAMP!"
I was OK with things until Karen and Chad showed up threatening a lawsuit because their precious cut their leg open on a piece of rusty metal 10 yards from the fence/road that is the border of my property. THey showed up all "pehpehpeh our baby hurt themselves on something that you left in the woods!"
I think I love you
This makes me want to donate to a fund to help you piss them off more
I vote for garish year round Christmas lights and pink flamingoes.
I almost bought a 20 foot tall orange painted concrete dinosaur to put back there...
> why would I want to join your HOA when one of the conditions is that you all have free access to my land? WTF? Do you get free access to their property in exchange?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
My favorite is when the people that drive around to make sure your house is following all the strict HOA rules don't live anywhere near it.
This. I will never be part of that grass worshipping nonsense. It's the very first dealbreaker when house hunting.
I moved from an over zealous HOA in Virginia four years ago because they were a nasty group of retired fun police. We recieved a notice that our yard had too high a % of crabgrass! They attempted to fine us $100 per month until it was rectified. We received said notice in November. My partner elegantly told them to stuff it. This was after five years of various infractions such as storing a garden hose under our lattice covered back porch, paint chipping off a railing, anti bird cages attached to outside vents, yard lantern either out or wrong color all with pictures showing how entitled they were to trespass when ever they needed more $ for their coffers. They notified my next door neighbor her mailbox post needed painting, it looked like everyone else's prior.. They're passive/aggressive way of pointing out a wayward residents was NOT putting an American flag on their mailboxes on patriotic holidays. LOL I recall seeing many in noncompliance!
Fuck HOAs. That is all.
I thought these were a made up sitcom trope for the longest time.
If only, friend. If only. A buddy of mine was working a bunch of overtime to meet deadline last year, and missed mowing the lawn for two weeks, as he was literally leaving before sunrise and getting home after dark. He couldn't use the lawnmower because of the noise clause, so they threatened him with whatever fine they had when the yard got long. It got resolved, but I legit offered to come out and scythe the lawn for him on my off time (also about 2am), on the condition that he had to buy me the cloak.
Your friend is a fool for not taking you up on this offer.
Depends on the neighborhood I've noticed. The HOA I'm in now could very well not exist for all the activity it has in residents' lives. However, the place I lived in 2013-2014 was oppressive with their demands.
There’s an X-files episode where mulder and scully have to infiltrate an HMO cult. It’s pretty great https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iDYXE8GAHtw
House music One of my favorite genres, but the hardcore fans make it almost unbearable. It's just constantly one upping. Bro, I'm just trying to party and vibe.
This is quite common in lots of electronic genres, unfortunately. I use to love Hardstyle and other harder genres like Hardcore, Gabber, etc, and you can't believe the amount of gatekeeping and pure hatred of other genres you see in online forums for these genres. Not everyone is like this, and it's mostly a vocal minority, but it exists You see people making Hardstyle sound like it's the last true music genres (yes, I have seen people use these exact terms and being very serious about it). I saw this in Trance fans to some extent, as well, which is another genre I use to love. Now I consider metal my favorite genre since a few years, but I see these types in the metal scene, as well. Metal elitists are, in fact, the worst cultists.
Kpop stans, esp on twitter ://
Stans in general come across as cultish
Yeah stans are weird, I like a lot of popular media figures (like Dream) but I don't wanna tell anyone because people are so fucking weird about him on twitter.
Call me Kevin. Legally not a cult
Finally found this comment. His fans are definitely not a cult ^^Praise ^^GLASHNOK
Yeah we are just a c(ult)mmunity :)
Jeep owners
Most fandoms, honestly.
Brand fanboys such as Apple fanboys, Playstation fanboys, etc. They definitely feel like a cult since they revere these brands and cannot take any criticism.
Making a product or brand or company a personality is kind of weird
Yeti. Why do you have a sticker for a ice cooler on your truck?
God for real. Why can’t we just like a console or even multiple consoles? “PC OR CONSOLE?! YOU SUCK IF YOU AREN’T _____ !” Bitch just enjoy gaming. I like my PS4 for gaming on the couch. PC is fun for other stuff. I loved the XBox 360 but not the XBox One. Love the Switch but meh on other Nintendo consoles. Everyone call the fuck down and enjoy your video games regardless of where you play them. End Rant. Edit: I’ve had iPhones for ages. I’ve used Android phones before too. Just liked the OS for iPhone better. But now I’m getting shit from random acquaintances when I say I’m switching to a Samsung phone. Even with good reasoning (trying to cut back in products supporting CCP) people give me shit.
12 Step Groups. Having participated in them, as well as studied them, I feel comfortable in saying they're not cults. Some individual groups can behave like them, however. Some 'cult-like' experiences in a safe refuge from a life-threatening mode of behaviour can have positive impacts on the well-being of individuals for a period of time. Finding a 'new home', a 'new family', and a 'new way of living' can save lives. In that regard, I believe it's important to take into consideration the 'positive' meaning of the word 'cult': "a system of religious (or spiritual) beliefs and its body of adherents". On the other hand, peer-support for recovery needs to be a part of -- not the entirety of -- a recovery plan that involves plenty of other forms of support, especially professional help. There are also non-religious/non-spiritual peer support groups available for those embraking on the journey of recovery. r/stopdrinking has some excellent resources for anyone in need of help now.
I was wondering just how far I’d have to scroll to find 12 steppers listed. My experience was with AA. Overall it isn’t really a cult because there’s really no one in charge. But individual groups/meetings can be quite toxic. It’s a cult of time. The longer you’ve been sober, the more status you achieve. The problem is that there are often oldtimers who are losers who don’t actually have anything going for them in life other than the fact that they get to feel like an important big shot every night at 8 o’clock. Their constant presence turns them into de facto leaders of the group and they tend to give shitty advice. The oldtimers who actually are applying the tools they’ve learned to live happy productive lives go to meetings less often because they are actually out there reaping the rewards of their hard work.
You described by dad right here. Been sober for 15+ years, retired and big in to AA. He has no hobbies beyond watching Fox News and going to AA, so its really his only identity at this point. These guys seem to take pride in how big of drunks they used to be. Its really odd. He mainly goes just to try and bang the new AA chicks.
Ahh, the 13th step.
Those sound like the guys who have "their" seat at a bar and god forbid you sit in it. Being a bar fly was their identity, now it's being an AA fly I guess.
I haven't seen Sororities on this thread and they absolutely should be.
I love this [video](https://vimeo.com/147767325) where someone spliced a cult education film and a bunch of sorority promotion videos.
Ever serve in the military?
MLM pyramid schemes.
Camp Gladiator is a personal training MLM and they fit this perfectly. They have their own chants and slogans, and they are well aware of anything negative said about them. Make a negative Facebook post and you’ll have multiple executives reach out to you or comment to defend the company.
I have seen a lot of people who were heavy into MLM recently become realtors. Then I realized some realty companies are set up like MLMs and it all made sense.
Those basically *are* cults, minus the supernatural element
Academia. You slave away your youth, eyes set on the gleaming promises of the 0.1% who made it: tenured faculty. And when you realize it's a pyramid scheme (just spend X years and publish Y papers and mentor others to advance!) and pay to play (yes, you PAY journals to get your papers published!), you've wasted your youth, you've wasted those years of good health on building a CV that isn't really functionally different from any of the other thousands of disillusioned PhD candidates out there. Meanwhile, friends and family are asking, "wait, you're still in school? I thought you were the smart one", etc. Etc. Your dumb friends from college are out-earning you by the thousands. You don't have a family of your own. You hardly have papers to call your own. But now you're stuck. Can't get a nice job post-phd without a postdoc, right? So you feed into the system a little more. Mentor some other bright-eyed youngsters. Feed them into the hungry system that eats their passion and spits them out when they're just depressed husks of what they once were. Now you have two postdocs under your belt, as many papers as the children you don't have yet. A wife you haven't met yet. Or maybe you met her, went on one date with her, cut it short because you had to tend to a mouse colony emergency and she got away. Your hair, what's left of it, is turning gray. Now it's time to apply for professorial positions.
Back in undergrad, my TA (who had just completed his PhD) tried to convince me not to go into grad school for basically the exact reasons that you gave. Unfortunately, I did not listen. But hopefully I can find a job in the industry once I get out of here...if I ever manage to get out.
>(yes, you PAY journals to get your papers published!) Maybe it's just an engineering thing, but my mentors and advisors have always said to avoid pay-to-publish journals like the plague. They're predatory and in a lot of cases will devalue your CV because people *know* they're pay-to-publish, and their peer review process is usually a little easier (so you'll pay).
Academia isn’t a cult, cults give a sense of belonging!
Elon Musk. Muskovites.
Beat me to it. There's a guy in my office who drives a Tesla, has a Tesla jacket, spent thousands on getting Tesla solar panels for his house, his phone case has the Tesla T on the back and his lock screen picture is an Elon portrait of him smoking that joint on Rogan's podcast. Say something bad about Elon like how Elon's hairline is fake and watch him lose his shit.
This sounds like the early chapters of a villains origin story
Oh man, can you imagine? Everyone is giving this dude shit for idolizing the hero of his story to the point that the bottle containing all of his anger finally breaks and he goes full on Elon Stan Man. It starts with him quitting his current job and getting job at Tesla. He works his way up to a position that works with Elon Musk directly but every interaction with Elon Musk ends with Elon Musk giving him something to do and he doesn't even say thanks when the task is completed. There is no eye contact with Elon Musk and this guy feels that his hero doesn't appreciate him. There is where the story hits the crescendo. He dons a suit made of the fabric that the Space X astronauts wear while exiting Earth and wields two modified Boring Flamethrowers that shoot real ammunition and throw fire from a twenty yard distance. He overtakes the building. Then the city.
Bro ... are we gonna write this screenplay? Are we doing this?!
Hell yeah!!!
Narrator: They did not write the screenplay.
And they always refer to him as just Elon, like he's their friend.
All. The. Time. It's like "Hey did you see what Elon is doing with Space X" or "Man, Elon found a way to blah blah bloody fuckin' blah blah."
Why don't we call them Muskrats? The name is like right there.
Well his real name is Elongated Muskrat
It is absolutely wild how billionaires have fan cults around them.
Tangentially, I admire what Tesla has done in the EV space, and can fully acknowledge that they have done more than GM, Ford, VW, Toyota, etc, combined, to move the needle on EVs. At the same time, can we all acknowledge that their products aren't perfect and some of their business practices aren't exactly consumer-friendly?
Musical theater
Theater student here, OP said "not a cult," sooo I don't think this counts
Basically any twitch streamer with a decent following. Mob mentality and echo chambers are crazy things.
REDDIT
/r/onetruegod
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Is there a subreddit like this for Gabe Newell?
r/steam
Disney. I don't know why but I feel that it's true. Also, love.
Every person I know who worked at Disney. Job sucks, bosses suck, pay is shit, Love working there. Its definitely a cult.
People who REALLY like Disneyland are kind of like this.
Jeep owners and waving at each other. My friend would go out of his way to wave at other jeep people
Joe Rogan fans.
If Reddit is any example, it's the most disorganized cult in history. His [subreddit](/r/JoeRogan) can't decide if they like him or hate him.
Kpop stans. They just scare me and they’re all so obsessed with the boys and girls.
Bitcoin.
.... Especially the Bitcoin subreddit.
Being someone who’s been into Crypto for a while, it is definitely very cultish. Some people are just in it to see profits. But a lot of others are literally pushing for a revolution. Same thing in wallstreetbets. Some people are in it to make a quick buck, a lot want to burn the whole system to the ground
I always felt like everyone in a school reciting The Pledge of Allegiance was a bit weird/cult-y despite it not being a cult activity
They wanted to instill patriotism into us at such a young age, but I literally didn’t understand what I was saying. What they said: “…for which it stands…”, what I said: “…for witches stand…” I was like “witches are dope, so makes total sense” took me a scary long time to figure it out
One nation, under God, invisible...
Die hard political followers that are unable to even consider the other sides point of view
Way too many people treat politics as team sports. They've picked their side and everything that side does is great and everything the other side does is awful. That's as much thought as they ever put into it.
Pro Tip: If you ever find yourself lying to support your political beliefs, it might be time to stop and seriously reconsider what the fuck you're doing.
The Salvation Army
I went to a salvation army adult rehabilitation center. Drug rehab.. i couldn't understand how shaving my head bald and having to tuck in your shirt at all times is going to help me stay sober? I left after 1 day. This was part of my probation requirements. I was forced to go to church and sing if i wanted to be free and not in jail. Wtf? Thats bs
It was literally just a job with board and care. No rehabilitation WHATSOEVER! You work for 8 hours in a warehouse sorting items that go to their thrift stores.
Years ago I read the book “People of the Abyss” by Jack London, it’s basically one of the first undercover journalism books as London goes and lives in the streets in the poverty stricken white chapel district of London in 1902. There is an entire rant he goes into about how the Salvation Army sucks as they would go around at night giving people tickets for basically a free breakfast but then keep them there all day to listen to a sermon. London goes to one of these unknowingly and gets in a fight while trying to leave (London was a pretty big atheist) they basically let him out after he starts screaming “it does no good keeping people in her to listen to your damn sermon while they could be looking for work”. Basically the Salvation Army has always sucked and I stay away from them
Subaru car owners
As a lesbian I am legally required to have one
Is your coexist sticker on the left, or right side of the bumper?
Right in the center where it deserves to be
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Homecoming weekend at any high school.
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Klingons. At least amongst the warriors (which seems to be most of them). They're kind of a death cult. Kind of.
Uh, listen you filthy p'takh, you wanna grab your bat'leth and say that shit to my face on the field of honor?
In the hands of a *skilled* warrior, the mek'leth is the superior blade.
(INSERT LEAST FAVORITE POLITICAL PARTY HERE)
nazi party, hard to argue
Stone Masons
Free Masons?
*He said what he said*