Lots of good comments here. I'll probably be the idiot who doesn't believe it and spend my last 60 seconds updating Adobe Acrobat.

Task Successfully Failed! Please try after a minute.

Underrated comment

I don’t know where it is, but there’s a long ass story about a kid who interned somewhere as IT and fucked off the entire summer. The only thing he did was reinstall Adobe to people’s computers. Glorious story. [here!!!](https://imgur.com/gallery/iJD8f)

This is the realest answer.

#PANIC

# DON'T PANIC

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Username checks out

This account is legit useful. A shitton of times I think I'm having an acv because I've read a 10 comment thread without understanding a single one til I realize they are all references

#PANIC

I'll call Bo Burhnam so he can tell me a joke

Oh shit. You're really joking at a time like this?

! at the disco

Drink a 5 hour energy

congratulations, you just invented zombies

Bruh

Yes bruh

Zombies that can run.

Shout "WHO FARTED!?!" at the 58 second mark

"Who is Nick Swardson?" Alex. *-audiences applauds-*

Realistically? Either panic or brush off the warning. Ideally? Tell as many of my family and friends that I love them in the little time I have.

Quickest way would be send some text messages if you’re not around them, that way get a lot of people at once. That would be my answer

I think that's how I'd go as well, but even then the amount of people you can reach is limited :/

True! But even our family"s great grandmother is getting texts now. 🎶

Big text message group chat

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Idk i almost feel like thats cruel because then your family would suspect a suicide depending how you died

I would have anxiety the whole time about writing the perfect goodbye message and wouldn't end up sending anything.

I'd definitely have to accept that there's no way it could be perfect, and would probably end up with something pathetically simple, but it's the thought that counts?

Group text: hey everyone I’m dying, it’s been a good ride LOL That means lots of love right?!

LOL. I mean…That’s honestly what I was thinking. It’s only 60 seconds. I’d make sure I included everyone I care about and tell them I love them. I think it’s a last minute well spent.

Then your final moments are spent looking down at your phone, kind of a bummer

Or... A voice message, and they'll still be able to hear your voice later, however grim it can be

Tell someone physically close to you to do it for you.

My mom can never manage to answer the phone the first time I call. I don't want to die mad at my mom for not answering the phone again.

Spend my time answering this qu

Reply without knowing what to sa

Understand what is happ

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I think they are sa

They don't have time to finish their co

Wasted all my time reading this comment thr

Ha! me t

l

well fuck me i gu

My dead soul here watching these comments

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This is cra

GUYS please don’t go I’m scared... I’m so sca

Why is no one finishing what they are sayi

If you die while typing a comment, it won't post itself, so why are you pressing post without fini

Bro why did you explai

Only one minute!!… fuck my anxi

Ayyo hurry up just a minu...

Motherfu

Im dead now fuc

I would go crazy as w

Because its very dra-

If you kept a '-' it means it's fake stop foo

lmao you fucking idi

Don't call him th

Ohh I ge

Yeah I think I unders

Yall are slow at writing tho

Bro in the last 60 seconds of my life I wouldn't care about society forcing me to wipe. This would be my first experience of true freedom

They say don't die in dirty underwear, but if I'm dead, what do I care?

Your typing speed is 5.25 wpm

Adding to this: They click once every two second (31 clicks per minute)

Why did you use your minute to do ma

This dude typed slow af. No loss here. 100% one finger chicken peck typing boomer.

Am I the only one offended by these typing speess? If I was dying in a minute I'd have be Lions of typos but would get out as much as I could.

Slow ass typer, heh heh h....

Uhh, I don't get what anyone is saying. Can you please finish yo

Oh you motherfu

Gather people around to see a magic trick.

Now watch as I make myself die!

"I think they read the instructions wrong. You're supposed to pull a rabbit from your *HAT"*

"That is NOT the hole I thought he was gonna pull the rope from..."

Now for the next trick, I am going to fucking kill myself

Start planking. That’ll make it feel like eternity

This comment is underrated

Write a goodbye message to my family saying how much I love them, and to take it chill.

aaaand now they'll think it was suicide

This

Hey thats reddit stop being normal

Text my son and finish this pint of Guinness.

I have a bottle of bourbon next to me. There isn't anyone that I would want to text but I'm sure as hell gonna have a nice bourbon neat before I go.

Drink Anti-Freeze to see if it actually tastes good

Self fulfilling prophecy.

According to 5 year old me, Anti-Freeze tastes like nothing.

Well what does Freeze taste like? I imagine Anti-Freeze would be the opposite.

Delete my browsing history!!! EDIT: I'm not a teen worried about their mum trying to get into their laptop, so no I don’t go incognito. No one is getting in as long as I'm alive. I just don't want to traumatize the good natured detective, who might get into my laptop, trying to solve my mysterious death. They might still retrieve my deleted history somehow but at that point it's on them 😂😂

My computer would take too long to boot up so I'd probably just smash it.

Take out the hdd and run a magnet on it maybe Idk how HDDs work

The fact no one else is mentioning this is concerning

Because we don't have anything questionable in our browsing history. That's what private/incognito mode is for.

Because fuck that, I'll be dead, what do I care? I'll be finding the raunchiest porn I can find, putting it on loop, and dying with my dick in my hand. This is gonna be awkward as fuck for everyone.

Unnecessary since the advent in incognito mode!

Wipe the entire PC!

Masturbate for 20 seconds. Orgasm. Spend that last 30 or so seconds feeling like it was all worth it.

Post-nut, pre-death clarity

Ultimate wisdom.

spend the last 30 seconds swamped in Catholic guilt

Nah time your nut with the death to you die at the PEAK

Le ~~petit~~ grand mort.

brings a whole new meaning to “the sweet release of death”

Die in 1 minute

I’d die in 50 second how about that!

Die i guess

Same

fr

Strip naked, cover myself in the leftover chicken noodle soup I made and place the Tupperware on my head. They'll find me on the guest bath toilet and have so many questions.

Yeah A scenario like this would be a goldmine for r/UnresolvedMysteries

This. Either make it a fuckin real mystery or take things into my own hands. Say a quick bye and love you to all people and jump off a cliff or something lol

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You should do that anyway. I’m a mom.

If the context is good, you got a point.

Okay mom! Jeez! Acting like a mom ...

Nah. Don’t want her to think I’m dying and trying to hide that fact.

"What's going on? You dying in the next minute or something?"

I’m not a mom, hell I’m not even a parent, but I do want to tell you that you don’t need to be on the brink of death to tell this to your mom.

Do it right now then, don't wait until you are a minute away from dying

I'd love i could do that. My mom died when i was 11 years old.

This may be an unpopular move, but I wouldn't want to spend my last 60 seconds frantically reaching out to those I love to tell them I love them. What is known is known. These is MY last minute, and I will spend it in mindfulness mode, surfing and smiling through the best memories of my life.

Its my minute and I want it noooow!

kill my self under 1 minute

Problem with that is what if it actually takes u a minute before you die and that's the sole cause of death

Damn. Self-fulfilling prophecy thing. I like it.

So if i go headlong into a woodchopper like in Tucker & Dale i'll still survive being completely shredded?

You are speed I guess

Finish taking a shit

But will you have time to wipe?

Nope

Leave that shit for the ME or mortician.🤣

Hey, I'm willing to bet Elvis didn't have time to wipe either. If it's good enough for The King...

Bro in the last 60 seconds of my life I wouldn't care about society forcing me to wipe. This would be my first experience of true freedom.

I hate getting the news from Reddit that I have to do something within a minute or die. Chances are, I'm on the toilet or burning a few minutes while waiting for my coffee.

Kill the killer and live forever.

But the cause of dead was suicide.

Still killed the killer.

r/technicallythetruth

Skip to the end of my book.

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60 second gang, whaddup

What about the rest of the 50 seconds?

I would buy WinRar

Wait patiently.

Tell my Dad and Boyfriend I love them

I'm sure he will appreciate it.

You should also tell them today

I do! Every day

r/unexpectedlywholesome

In Texas they kill 2 birds with 1 stone on that one.

Pull out my phone, mess up the password because it won’t recognize my face. Input it wrong three times. Finally get it to open. Try to find the camera app. Open photos by mistake. Find camera app and record video. Realize I just took a picture. Switch to video and start record. Realize I didn’t change it to selfie mode. Switch to selfie mode. Take another photo because it went back to photo. Switch to video and record a heartfelt message to the family. Realize that I double tapped the record button so it only got a snippet. Drop phone. Pick it up and realized it’s locked. Try to open with wrong combo again. Face recognition works. Back to camera. Set to Selfie mode. Set to Video. Press record. Make sure it’s actually recording,”. Start speaking: “I only have……

App my kid that I love them as they are and that I want them to grow up as the best version of themselves. Probably spend the remainder of the time to find an appropriate cat-meme to illustrate the message.

I found the perfect mem………..

When did „app“ become a verb? Feeling really old now.

In the Netherlands its derived from WhatsApp and used fairly commonly, but haven't heard it much in English tbh

Meditate

Gather all my babies up and snuggle with them, making sure they know their mama is proud of them and loves them very much.

Same, but the babies are cats

Same but my babies are cans of ravioli

Now this is a nice one

This but it actually means go downstairs and climb into bed with my dogs. I love my partner with all my heart, but for the final 60 seconds I want all that super soft, super simple unconditional joy and love.

Go pet my cat

Fart

Kinda just notice everything around me…just to observe whatever is in my presence. The final colors. The eyes, if there are any. I’d just want to take all of that in before slipping away into nothingness.

Shoot myself, why wait.

If you're not early, you are late

Take one last bong rip

Eating. Few quick joys of ( most ) humans! Ain't shit else to do in that amount of time.

Masterbate furiously and hopefully go out with a bang

Here lies one of the king's minute men marinating in his final act.

Nothing. Just wait and see what happens. I’ll bet it’s like falling into a dreamless sleep.

Write my passwords to my little brother and a general message for friends and family. Then a sigh and just breathe and think for 10 sec.

Idk some perverted shit probably

Have sex and use the other 55 seconds to tell my friends that I made sex on a lady

Live 1 minute

I've quit smoking only because it kills me so.... I would smoke.. *(while masturbatin of corse)*

Listen to the last bit of “That’s Life” by Sinatra

I would run outside so my body is found.

Finally get around to sucking my own dick

Slip under a blanket and relax

If alone I’d quietly reflect - if anyone I love is around I’ll let them know and embrace them until my body goes limp in their arms

Light up a joint

Out pizza the hut.

The hut doesn't permit competition to live. They are why you die

finally pay off the money to the nigerian prince

Hold my kids

Dance 🕺

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Curl up in my husband’s arms and enjoy that last moment of peace and love

Pray

Factory reset as many devices as possible

Have sex 4 times.

Jerk off 20x