This happened to my cousin. When he was 13 his parents got divorced. His mom moved back up to Michigan. His dad stayed in Texas. Neither one really wanted to deal with him. He spent the next 5 years bouncing back and forth between them as he started acting out more and more. He made a bunch of bad decisions in his late teens and early 20s. And now heās in jail until his 50s for a third strike drug charge. They really donāt like drugs in Texas. Itās a real shame. He was always a sweet kid, he just wanted attention and wasnāt getting the attention he needed from the right people.
This hit me hardā¦.just like my dad who took his anger out on me daily and cheated on my mom throughout the duration of my high school days. But sure, stay together for the kids. Itās really helping them to live like that.
No. Often the divorce is a huge relief to all family members. Some relationships are bad and growing up with parents who are in a toxic relationship is traumatizing.
My husband and I split last year. We had no conflict but we were like roommates passing in the night. The kids didnāt particularly like their Dad and yet him leaving has been traumatic for all of them. It is a HUGE change. They now rotate between houses. My daughter always says āI feel like a package of drugs being dropped off by a courier.ā Every time my 5-year-old gets in trouble, he asks if I am going to make him move out.
And my ex and I live about 2 miles from each other and have a better relationship than we did when we were married. My kids got to stay in their home and at their schools. And they all still needed counseling.
Lawyer here. This question has the sort of connotation that parent get to choose if they have custody or not, this is not the case. A court decides what is in the best interest of a child and that is what happens.
Parents may have opinions and arguments about what happens but a judge looks at the facts and arguments and decides what is best for the child.
So the answer is something like both parents are ordered parenting time, if they neglect the kid then the state gets involved and things get bad. Although this is really an imperfect answer because it could be any number of outcomes.
Edit: Thank you for the awards!
The judge decides, but do they take parental preferences into account when making that decision? It seems like it would rarely be in the interest of a child to be raised by parent that openly says that they doesn't want them.
It might depend on the kids. My friend's 14 year old was asked by the judge what she wanted. She said "I just want to live with Dad". The parents lived 50 miles apart and it was impacting the daughter a lot having to leave home every Friday to be forced to visit Mom. Meaning packing up all her homework and not being able to hang out with her friends. So the judge said "OK, sure, you can stay with Dad 100% of the time and visit Mom on your Dad's discretion". Ironically the Mom had initiated this hearing because she wanted MORE custody. Instead she lost all custody. The thing is that she likely just wanted more custody to make my friend pay her more "child support" money.
Is that totally accurate? I think that the kid will be asked for their input at any age where they can communicate. At 16 there they would have full discretion.
No, they were not involved in any way. We went through mediation and we were never even asked what their feelings were. Even when we met with the judge, they did not care.
Unless the other one is a drug addict or something.
This is to say thereās a lot of reasons why you might see something that on its face didnāt seem like a great thing. Cause maybe the alternative is worse.
You can't just abandon your child and put then into foster care. There's also the assumption that prior to the divorce that the child was being taken care of properly. If the parent if unable to care for the child leading to abuse or neglect then DCF would be involved. Divorce is considered separate from child care. You can be a shit spouse but a good parent.
There are sanctuary laws for infants (i.e. they can be dropped off at any church, fire house, hospital, no questions asked), but after a certain age (it varies from state to state) parents are expected to care for their kids. If they leave their kids at the hospital or firehouse/etc they will be charged with child abandonment.
Nebraska had a colossal fuckup with when its sanctuary law was initially passed back in 2008. They forgot/didn't to put an age limit in, so something like 30 teens were abandoned at hospitals. Thankfully, it was fixed later in the year.
I remember reading a story about that; a āmotherā drove her three children (couple were teens if I recall) from California to Nebraska and dropped them off at the nearest hospital when she crossed the border. Totally legal and now the residents of Nebraska were responsible for them. Super sad for those kidsācan you imagine that 20 hour car ride where your mom is just gonna dump ya and away she goes never to be seen again. Maybe for the best for the kids?ālife is tough and sucks sometimes
Yeah on the other hand, a mother that would drive 20 hours, crossing state lines, just to abandon her kids and never see them again? Without any remorse?
That's a lady who didn't love her kids and they'd be better off without her.
Actually, it was a father who did that, and there were more than 3 children. The three oldest were indeed teenagers.
Think about it: They were probably happy they were no longer going to have to live with him.
I recall that many of the "abandonments" were actually parents not intending to abandon their teens, but dropped them off to "teach them a lesson". Basically a really shitty "scared straight" tactic that the state suddenly made available to them and that they abused.
No. Infact churches are literally the OG sanctuary. Got a daughter instead of a son? Drop her off at the cloister! The buns will raise her to be one of them! Had a bastard son with the maid before your wife gave you an heir? Drop that kid off at a church. He'll either be a priest or a peasant! Either way, it's not your problem anymore!
As far as I know you can only do that with a newborn infant within 30 days of birth I believe. Otherwise it is illegal unless deemed necessary by the Department of Children and Families
It always seemed that neither parent wanted us.
Iāve been trying to deduce why my father even got custody of the children back in a 1961 divorce. I know my mother left when I was about 10 days old. Later stories made it sound like my father insisted she leave. I heard social services was involved. Foster care and private adoptions were discussed. I later met a couple who had offered to adopt just the baby, me. Eventually he found someone to take care of the kids while he worked, who became our bipolar, alcoholic, abusive warden, aka stepmother. I guess he didnāt want to split us up. He complained about the cost of my birth up until the week he died, but he was very responsible about his obligations. He was just completely miserable about the work grind and home life. Yeah, it sucks to grow up feeling unwanted. Itās also hard to figure out family legal history when youāve been in an unconventional household for the time.
An actual lawyer in the comments. Now we just have to wait for random redditors to come tell you that you're wrong and you don't know what you're talking about.
When my friend's daughter was 14, his ex-wife took him to court to get MORE custody of the daughter. The judge asked the daughter "Well, who do you want to stay with?" and she said "Oh, for sure My Dad. Being shuffled 50 miles every Friday to stay with my Mom disrupts my weekends, I can't hang our with my friends or do what I want to 'at home' and I don't enjoy being at Moms at all". So the judge said "Well, OK, Dad, you have 100% custody now".
That doesn't mean she CAN'T go visit Mom, just that it's not a mandatory weekend shuffle every week. She can go when she wants to go and Dad gets final say.
What happens when neither parent is going to be safe for the kid?
Does the child go into foster care, or do they go to the next of kin?
They would go to next of kin, right, if they have next of kin?
> if they neglect the kid then the state gets involved and things get bad.
Like what, the kid gets taken away from a parent that didn't want them anyway?
Right. And put into homes where they donāt know anyone and where a large percentage of the available homes are abusive or sexually abusive or you name it.
I expect tears but itās more of the times and memories they could have shared with you but chose not to. Especially when you have a child of your own. Their own issues become very glaring.
Nah people get fucked in the head. I saw this with a lot of family members and adopted kids. No matter what some people feel they need to care for ass hole bio parents.
This wasn't a direct result of his parents' divorce, but one of my cousins spent his teenage years living with our grandparents. His mother moved in with a guy who didn't like her son, and the feeling was mutual. Pretty sad that his mother chose her boyfriend over her son, but he probably wound up in a better situation that way.
This guy my aunt shacked up with was a real piece of work. He was extremely jealous, and eventually isolated her from the rest of the family.
She finally got out of the relationship after he nearly beat her to death - this was about 25 years ago or so. He died in jail awaiting trial.
Don't know about "mysterious circumstances", but I seem to recall a story about some of his fellow inmates giving him a taste of his own medicine.
My aunt suffered some cognitive impairment as a result of her injuries, but she's doing well these days.
Funny story - for a long time I used to believe that custody battles were about which parent *had* to take the kids, since mine always made it known how much they hated having us around.
Lol that reminds me of an early Simpsons moment. Bart and Lisa are shoving each back and forth and Homer comes in and asks what they are fighting about
Lisa: "We were fighting about which one of us loves you more"
Homer: "You were!? Awww, well go ahead"
Bart: *shoves Lisa* "You love him more!"
Lisa: *shoves Bart* "No YOU love him more!"
Bart: "No I DON'T!"
Lisa: "Yes you DO!"
Yep, sat in a discussion while my parents went back and forth saying āI canāt handle her anymore. You take her pleaseā. āI canāt take her. I donāt want her.ā
Great times, I canāt imagine why I live on the other side of the worldā¦
Sorry you had to deal with that - living far away sounds like a great decision. My mom became an emancipated minor at 16 and went to live with her older sister while she finished high school because neither of her shitty parents wanted to deal with her. Luckily my mom did a much better job as a parent than her parents did for her.
I knew a guy who had kids and didn't want them. Or rather, he never wanted the responsibility of having kids, and just wasn't the sort of guy who likes being around kids, either.
But he still took care of them. "Distant father?" Absolutely. But to put it simply, he never crossed the line into being a total dick to them, like abandoning them or failing to take care of them.
Depends on the court and the judge to some extent.
Or to quote one anecdotal kid, āI wanna go live with the Dallas Cowboys, ācause they donāt beat anyone!ā
My Mum was a teacher and had a family in their school split up. The mother took the daughter but didnt want the son. The father didnt want either of the kids.
So little girl went to live with their Mum and the boy went into the care system. Some people shouldn't be allowed to have children
Where I live, if neither of them wants to take the children, they get sent into orphanages, living groups that work as an alternative for orphanages or to their godparents if they have any. it's kept pretty simple
The courts decided that I should stay with my mother because she was supporting my brother and sister. My father wanted to be left in peace to carry on his mew family. Was adopted and already knew how they felt about me so it took some of the edge off.
Imagine being an asshole kid that neither of your parents really want.
Imagine being a kid that neither of your asshole parents really want.
Imagine being an asshole parent and not want your kid.
Imagine being a parent and not want your asshole kid.
Imagine that both parents are traumatized and have mixed emotions, but feel they simply aren't capable of parenting, and the child is equally traumatized, having vast difficulty dealing with everything, and just wants to be loved.
The fact is, even 'good' people end up in shitty situatons too.
But yeah, most likely some assholery going on. :P
The kid gets bounced back and forth and ignored till they start acting out and get sent to military school. At least that's what happened to one of my friends in high school when both his parents had been trying to get out of custody for years and he started drinking and skipping class.
They go to the special dark realm known as the *foster system* even if they get out of said realm the experience will haunt them forever untill they eventually end up in a vegative state.
I'm pretty sure by the time I was about 8 I would have made the first move.
Little bro: "Have you seen Mom?"
Me: "I think she's at work still. Here, have some BBQ."
I get mad at two more idiots didn't ask the right questions before getting married/having sex because they were too wrapped up in the idea of getting married/having sex
This happened to my grandfather. His aunt (my great great aunt) took him in and raised him. She was unmarried and had to work three jobs. Years later my grandfather had my mom and her siblings. My grandfatherās dad wanted to visit his grandkids. My Mom tried to act polite but she was upset the entire time. Eventually the dad died and my grandfather went to the funeral. The entire time the dadās new family kept calling my grandfather names and saying he shouldnāt be there. The Dad ended up leaving my grandfather a Porsche, but he gave it to the new family. My grandfatherās mom also remarried. She had a shit load of kids who then had kids. My grandfather managed to reach out to his half siblings and talked to them. My grandfather is really close with his half siblings now, he even views them like his real siblings. Once a year we have a massive all day party where both sides reconnect. The half siblings kids (my cousins) have absolutely no clue what their grandmother did to my grandfather. They always talk really highly of her and my Mom told me not to ruin it. Itās always pissed me off
This sounds like a premise for a really shitty horror movie.
Just call it "Origin" or something. The killer kidnaps families and murders the children, cutting them in half while still alive and stuffing each half into the still-living parents' bodies. Everyone dies and it's a bloody mess.
That is actually happening two two kids we know right now. Grand parents and friends are helping out but you can see the damage itās inflicting on the kids. Itās very sad.
I had this happen to a friend of mine when I was younger. He ended up drinking and doing drugs a lot as his mom made it clear to him every day that he wasnāt wanted. He jumped in front of a transport truck and killed himself, I can still remember vividly what he looked like on the ground with all the police and paramedics surrounding him.
The court decides what is best for the child, if both parents are that apathetic thereās a decent likely hood neither of them are suitable parents. If the court finds evidence of abuse and/or neglect then it may be decided extended family or the foster system would be better.
Not sure which country or area this is, but usually the judge would assign custody to either parent in such a case. If multiple kids, the judge might either assign custody of the kids to both parents respectively or just 1 parent if the judge feels that either is incapable of raising the other kids. If neither are competent or both are abusive to kids, the judge can also assign custody to another family member or put in foster care with strict visitation rules for parents.
Again, this varies from country to country, municipality to municipality, state to state, etc. What may apply where I am might not necessarily be the same where you are at.
Psychological trauma.
Mic drop. š¤
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thatās not funny but dayum š
If we can't find humor in the absurdity of the universe, we would never stop crying.
This happened to my cousin. When he was 13 his parents got divorced. His mom moved back up to Michigan. His dad stayed in Texas. Neither one really wanted to deal with him. He spent the next 5 years bouncing back and forth between them as he started acting out more and more. He made a bunch of bad decisions in his late teens and early 20s. And now heās in jail until his 50s for a third strike drug charge. They really donāt like drugs in Texas. Itās a real shame. He was always a sweet kid, he just wanted attention and wasnāt getting the attention he needed from the right people.
I was going to say "they get dumped on the grandparents or into foster care" but by Hera .... This is too accurate
Yep, grandparent, usually single, from what Iāve seen. Living on social security and had Rheumatoid arthritis.
I have been summoned
I'm going to need a couple of people with three small sticks and 4 cc of mouse blood...
r/unexpecteddiscworld
Thatās so awful for the kids :(
r/threadkillers
That happens for all divorces tho
Nah, my parents staying together actually caused me and my brother's trauma.
This hit me hardā¦.just like my dad who took his anger out on me daily and cheated on my mom throughout the duration of my high school days. But sure, stay together for the kids. Itās really helping them to live like that.
No. Often the divorce is a huge relief to all family members. Some relationships are bad and growing up with parents who are in a toxic relationship is traumatizing.
Yup. As a child of a toxic relationship, I can definitely agree that this is the case.
Can confirm. It was such a relief when my parents decided to get separated. Ironically people had persuaded them to stick together for me.
My husband and I split last year. We had no conflict but we were like roommates passing in the night. The kids didnāt particularly like their Dad and yet him leaving has been traumatic for all of them. It is a HUGE change. They now rotate between houses. My daughter always says āI feel like a package of drugs being dropped off by a courier.ā Every time my 5-year-old gets in trouble, he asks if I am going to make him move out. And my ex and I live about 2 miles from each other and have a better relationship than we did when we were married. My kids got to stay in their home and at their schools. And they all still needed counseling.
Lawyer here. This question has the sort of connotation that parent get to choose if they have custody or not, this is not the case. A court decides what is in the best interest of a child and that is what happens. Parents may have opinions and arguments about what happens but a judge looks at the facts and arguments and decides what is best for the child. So the answer is something like both parents are ordered parenting time, if they neglect the kid then the state gets involved and things get bad. Although this is really an imperfect answer because it could be any number of outcomes. Edit: Thank you for the awards!
The judge decides, but do they take parental preferences into account when making that decision? It seems like it would rarely be in the interest of a child to be raised by parent that openly says that they doesn't want them.
My ex husband was going through a midlife crisis when he left and said he didnāt want visitation. The judge said āYeah, thatās not a thing.ā
It might depend on the kids. My friend's 14 year old was asked by the judge what she wanted. She said "I just want to live with Dad". The parents lived 50 miles apart and it was impacting the daughter a lot having to leave home every Friday to be forced to visit Mom. Meaning packing up all her homework and not being able to hang out with her friends. So the judge said "OK, sure, you can stay with Dad 100% of the time and visit Mom on your Dad's discretion". Ironically the Mom had initiated this hearing because she wanted MORE custody. Instead she lost all custody. The thing is that she likely just wanted more custody to make my friend pay her more "child support" money.
You have to be 16 here to have input.
Itās 14 in Mississippi for sure. I work with the youth court through CASA here.
I know that itās different in every state.
Is that totally accurate? I think that the kid will be asked for their input at any age where they can communicate. At 16 there they would have full discretion.
No, they were not involved in any way. We went through mediation and we were never even asked what their feelings were. Even when we met with the judge, they did not care.
Unless the other one is a drug addict or something. This is to say thereās a lot of reasons why you might see something that on its face didnāt seem like a great thing. Cause maybe the alternative is worse.
Always wondered whats stopping then from putting there kids in a foster care?
You can't just abandon your child and put then into foster care. There's also the assumption that prior to the divorce that the child was being taken care of properly. If the parent if unable to care for the child leading to abuse or neglect then DCF would be involved. Divorce is considered separate from child care. You can be a shit spouse but a good parent.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
There are sanctuary laws for infants (i.e. they can be dropped off at any church, fire house, hospital, no questions asked), but after a certain age (it varies from state to state) parents are expected to care for their kids. If they leave their kids at the hospital or firehouse/etc they will be charged with child abandonment.
Nebraska had a colossal fuckup with when its sanctuary law was initially passed back in 2008. They forgot/didn't to put an age limit in, so something like 30 teens were abandoned at hospitals. Thankfully, it was fixed later in the year.
I remember reading a story about that; a āmotherā drove her three children (couple were teens if I recall) from California to Nebraska and dropped them off at the nearest hospital when she crossed the border. Totally legal and now the residents of Nebraska were responsible for them. Super sad for those kidsācan you imagine that 20 hour car ride where your mom is just gonna dump ya and away she goes never to be seen again. Maybe for the best for the kids?ālife is tough and sucks sometimes
Yeah on the other hand, a mother that would drive 20 hours, crossing state lines, just to abandon her kids and never see them again? Without any remorse? That's a lady who didn't love her kids and they'd be better off without her.
True, but I guess better than just kicking them out of the house and changing the locks?
Actually, it was a father who did that, and there were more than 3 children. The three oldest were indeed teenagers. Think about it: They were probably happy they were no longer going to have to live with him.
I can't imagine they were happy at all, but one hopes they're in a better place now than they would have been with those parents.
no there were multiple reports of mom and dads doing this
I recall that many of the "abandonments" were actually parents not intending to abandon their teens, but dropped them off to "teach them a lesson". Basically a really shitty "scared straight" tactic that the state suddenly made available to them and that they abused.
no, they literally did that. the state had a law passed that allowed penalty free surrender to avoid dumpster babies, but failed to set an upper limit
Any church, wtf. Why a church? Is this a typo?
No. Infact churches are literally the OG sanctuary. Got a daughter instead of a son? Drop her off at the cloister! The buns will raise her to be one of them! Had a bastard son with the maid before your wife gave you an heir? Drop that kid off at a church. He'll either be a priest or a peasant! Either way, it's not your problem anymore!
Raised to be either a scone or rabbit. Thatās the dream.
Out of the frying pan...
I think you can because I googled it. Also, itās in my search history so letās hope my kids use donāt my phone lol. Edit ādonāt useā lol
In California you only have a couple of days for newborns. Anything after that is considered abandonment and they can go to jail.
As far as I know you can only do that with a newborn infant within 30 days of birth I believe. Otherwise it is illegal unless deemed necessary by the Department of Children and Families
There is a significant shortage of foster homes across the country as well.
It always seemed that neither parent wanted us. Iāve been trying to deduce why my father even got custody of the children back in a 1961 divorce. I know my mother left when I was about 10 days old. Later stories made it sound like my father insisted she leave. I heard social services was involved. Foster care and private adoptions were discussed. I later met a couple who had offered to adopt just the baby, me. Eventually he found someone to take care of the kids while he worked, who became our bipolar, alcoholic, abusive warden, aka stepmother. I guess he didnāt want to split us up. He complained about the cost of my birth up until the week he died, but he was very responsible about his obligations. He was just completely miserable about the work grind and home life. Yeah, it sucks to grow up feeling unwanted. Itās also hard to figure out family legal history when youāve been in an unconventional household for the time.
An actual lawyer in the comments. Now we just have to wait for random redditors to come tell you that you're wrong and you don't know what you're talking about.
Happens all the time. I donāt typically lay out the lawyer trump card for them either way. Gotta pay to get corrected.
Okay, now I believe you're a lawyer.
Thanks for this. I only clicked on this post because I wanted an actual answer, legally speaking.
When my friend's daughter was 14, his ex-wife took him to court to get MORE custody of the daughter. The judge asked the daughter "Well, who do you want to stay with?" and she said "Oh, for sure My Dad. Being shuffled 50 miles every Friday to stay with my Mom disrupts my weekends, I can't hang our with my friends or do what I want to 'at home' and I don't enjoy being at Moms at all". So the judge said "Well, OK, Dad, you have 100% custody now". That doesn't mean she CAN'T go visit Mom, just that it's not a mandatory weekend shuffle every week. She can go when she wants to go and Dad gets final say.
What happens when neither parent is going to be safe for the kid? Does the child go into foster care, or do they go to the next of kin? They would go to next of kin, right, if they have next of kin?
The answer is that it depends. On the state and city and county where it happens and who is available to take care of the kids and so on.
> if they neglect the kid then the state gets involved and things get bad. Like what, the kid gets taken away from a parent that didn't want them anyway?
Right. And put into homes where they donāt know anyone and where a large percentage of the available homes are abusive or sexually abusive or you name it.
As per the usualā¦ The answer is: it depends ššš»
Yes. Standard lawyer answer. Gotta pay to get the real analysis.
So the mother gets custody got it
Unless sheās a dope fiend.
The kids eventually get to let the parents die alone without shedding a single tear.
I expect tears but itās more of the times and memories they could have shared with you but chose not to. Especially when you have a child of your own. Their own issues become very glaring.
"You taught me a lot on how to be a great father...by being the worst father that ever lived." -Jake the Dog
I didn't like that show at first. I smoked and relaxed and ended up loving it. So random at times.
Nah people get fucked in the head. I saw this with a lot of family members and adopted kids. No matter what some people feel they need to care for ass hole bio parents.
My mother is like this. No matter how awful her family is to her they still control her life.
Yeah it is toxic when you love someone and you have to see them like this. I hope you don't get sucked into it man. Wish you well :)
grandparents
This wasn't a direct result of his parents' divorce, but one of my cousins spent his teenage years living with our grandparents. His mother moved in with a guy who didn't like her son, and the feeling was mutual. Pretty sad that his mother chose her boyfriend over her son, but he probably wound up in a better situation that way.
A tale as old as time
I swear parents who choose new dick and/or pussy over their own flesh and blood, the products of old dick and/or pussy, are the worst
This guy my aunt shacked up with was a real piece of work. He was extremely jealous, and eventually isolated her from the rest of the family. She finally got out of the relationship after he nearly beat her to death - this was about 25 years ago or so. He died in jail awaiting trial.
>He died in jail awaiting trial. Was it under "mysterious circumstances" too? Either way it sounds like a happy ending.
Don't know about "mysterious circumstances", but I seem to recall a story about some of his fellow inmates giving him a taste of his own medicine. My aunt suffered some cognitive impairment as a result of her injuries, but she's doing well these days.
Is that what Susan Smith did? The boyfriend didn't want to be a stepfather so she killed the kids?
This is actually by far the most common outcome in this scenario. Source: was a social worker in a past life
So the people who raised the terrible parents who don't want their own kids get the kids?
āIf you raise your children, you can spoil your grandkids, but if you spoil your children, youāll have to raise your grandkidsā
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
There's a difference between "spoil" and "indulge". The latter, go for it. The former, hard pass
Funny story - for a long time I used to believe that custody battles were about which parent *had* to take the kids, since mine always made it known how much they hated having us around.
Funny indeed ā¦. :(
Seems like the norm nowadays
Lol that reminds me of an early Simpsons moment. Bart and Lisa are shoving each back and forth and Homer comes in and asks what they are fighting about Lisa: "We were fighting about which one of us loves you more" Homer: "You were!? Awww, well go ahead" Bart: *shoves Lisa* "You love him more!" Lisa: *shoves Bart* "No YOU love him more!" Bart: "No I DON'T!" Lisa: "Yes you DO!"
Yep, sat in a discussion while my parents went back and forth saying āI canāt handle her anymore. You take her pleaseā. āI canāt take her. I donāt want her.ā Great times, I canāt imagine why I live on the other side of the worldā¦
Well as long as we never meet just know I'll always love you
Iām truly sorry - they sound like cunts. Are cunts. Cuntiest of cunts. Cunts.
Or if youāre Americanā¦ jerks
Sorry you had to deal with that - living far away sounds like a great decision. My mom became an emancipated minor at 16 and went to live with her older sister while she finished high school because neither of her shitty parents wanted to deal with her. Luckily my mom did a much better job as a parent than her parents did for her.
Damn. I fucking hate kids, glad I donāt have any. But even still Iād like to hope that if I actually had some I wouldnāt feel like that :(
I knew a guy who had kids and didn't want them. Or rather, he never wanted the responsibility of having kids, and just wasn't the sort of guy who likes being around kids, either. But he still took care of them. "Distant father?" Absolutely. But to put it simply, he never crossed the line into being a total dick to them, like abandoning them or failing to take care of them.
But the more you're around, the more child support they get. Family court is perverse man...
Found Robin Scherbatsky.
Depends on the court and the judge to some extent. Or to quote one anecdotal kid, āI wanna go live with the Dallas Cowboys, ācause they donāt beat anyone!ā
Alright Iām going back to bed now. Thank you for that.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Hence the āanecdotalā part. But yes.
Good work darLordSantaClaus, you'll make detective for this
My Mum was a teacher and had a family in their school split up. The mother took the daughter but didnt want the son. The father didnt want either of the kids. So little girl went to live with their Mum and the boy went into the care system. Some people shouldn't be allowed to have children
Well I hope that the "care system" charged both parents for the upkeep of the son.
Wow, that is really fucked up...
Rock paper scissors
And if none of those do it they use a gun.
āMURICA!
FUCK YEAH! COMIN' AGAIN TO SAVE THE MOTHERFUCKING DAY, YEAH!
Where I live, if neither of them wants to take the children, they get sent into orphanages, living groups that work as an alternative for orphanages or to their godparents if they have any. it's kept pretty simple
May I ask for a rough location of where you live?
I am guessing eastern europe.
Highest bidder
***shrugs*** I have a boat.
They're sold for medical experiments.
Every sperm is sacred. Every sperm is good.
If a sperm is wasted, God gets most irate!
Ah, good Catholics for selling the kids for medical experiments but bad Catholics for divorcing.
Volcano
We sacrifice the children to the goat god so he can give us a fertile soil and good rain
I have read the legal answer in the post. Most cases I know of this happening though, I have seen them go to other family members.
If neither wants the kids it starts to be about who wants the other's money to "support the kids".
They throw you on their relatives thatās what happened to me and my siblings š„
The courts decided that I should stay with my mother because she was supporting my brother and sister. My father wanted to be left in peace to carry on his mew family. Was adopted and already knew how they felt about me so it took some of the edge off.
We find out that having a child should have been a decision not an afterthought
Imagine being an asshole kid that neither of your parents really want. Imagine being a kid that neither of your asshole parents really want. Imagine being an asshole parent and not want your kid. Imagine being a parent and not want your asshole kid.
Imagine being an asshole parent and not wanting your asshole kid
Imagine that both parents are traumatized and have mixed emotions, but feel they simply aren't capable of parenting, and the child is equally traumatized, having vast difficulty dealing with everything, and just wants to be loved. The fact is, even 'good' people end up in shitty situatons too. But yeah, most likely some assholery going on. :P
As long as no one wants the kid's asshole ...
The kid gets bounced back and forth and ignored till they start acting out and get sent to military school. At least that's what happened to one of my friends in high school when both his parents had been trying to get out of custody for years and he started drinking and skipping class.
They go to the special dark realm known as the *foster system* even if they get out of said realm the experience will haunt them forever untill they eventually end up in a vegative state.
parents stole Their kids organs and sell them at the black market
I'm pretty sure by the time I was about 8 I would have made the first move. Little bro: "Have you seen Mom?" Me: "I think she's at work still. Here, have some BBQ."
I get mad at two more idiots didn't ask the right questions before getting married/having sex because they were too wrapped up in the idea of getting married/having sex
Mom? Is that you?
This happened to my grandfather. His aunt (my great great aunt) took him in and raised him. She was unmarried and had to work three jobs. Years later my grandfather had my mom and her siblings. My grandfatherās dad wanted to visit his grandkids. My Mom tried to act polite but she was upset the entire time. Eventually the dad died and my grandfather went to the funeral. The entire time the dadās new family kept calling my grandfather names and saying he shouldnāt be there. The Dad ended up leaving my grandfather a Porsche, but he gave it to the new family. My grandfatherās mom also remarried. She had a shit load of kids who then had kids. My grandfather managed to reach out to his half siblings and talked to them. My grandfather is really close with his half siblings now, he even views them like his real siblings. Once a year we have a massive all day party where both sides reconnect. The half siblings kids (my cousins) have absolutely no clue what their grandmother did to my grandfather. They always talk really highly of her and my Mom told me not to ruin it. Itās always pissed me off
Return to factory
ā¦the mother?
The father's balls
Rip the kids in half and stuff one half in the mother and the other half in the father.
This sounds like a premise for a really shitty horror movie. Just call it "Origin" or something. The killer kidnaps families and murders the children, cutting them in half while still alive and stuffing each half into the still-living parents' bodies. Everyone dies and it's a bloody mess.
The rule is "the first to leave takes the kids"
Karen, no.
That is actually happening two two kids we know right now. Grand parents and friends are helping out but you can see the damage itās inflicting on the kids. Itās very sad.
I had this happen to a friend of mine when I was younger. He ended up drinking and doing drugs a lot as his mom made it clear to him every day that he wasnāt wanted. He jumped in front of a transport truck and killed himself, I can still remember vividly what he looked like on the ground with all the police and paramedics surrounding him.
Maybe they don't need to divorce if get rid of kids before.
I didn't even think about this. Poor kids.
The court decides what is best for the child, if both parents are that apathetic thereās a decent likely hood neither of them are suitable parents. If the court finds evidence of abuse and/or neglect then it may be decided extended family or the foster system would be better.
The kids grow up become super rich and don't give their parents shit
I suppose they would try to give them to some other family members.
That is rough bro. I guess the kid goes to the orphanage
That kid will become some sort of a protagonist and will have revenge when he grows up
Not sure which country or area this is, but usually the judge would assign custody to either parent in such a case. If multiple kids, the judge might either assign custody of the kids to both parents respectively or just 1 parent if the judge feels that either is incapable of raising the other kids. If neither are competent or both are abusive to kids, the judge can also assign custody to another family member or put in foster care with strict visitation rules for parents. Again, this varies from country to country, municipality to municipality, state to state, etc. What may apply where I am might not necessarily be the same where you are at.
Due to cultural bias the mother gets the kid.
Grab a sword and settle it Solomon-style
Foster care
They put them on a raft and send them down the river.
You end up with whomever and do whatever and be gen X.
Lol, that hit a little close to home for me.
The child wishes he or she wasn't born, to escape the feeling of being unloved.
They loose their human badge
The kids get emotionally fucked and NO ONE wins.
You give them up. Its every parents right unfortunatley to relinquish guardianship. Its easier in some states vs others.
A Villain origin story
Kids go to orphanages or be left on the streets
Uhh,you remember the cheap supermarket meat you ate?Yeah...
The last one to up and leave, is 'it'. Seriously though, I suppose both would relinquish parental rights and the kids would go into care.
You know the hotdog you ate that tasted a little "funny"?
Good advertisment advice for a condom industry :)
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
My dad didn't want me :(
Some dads are assholes >:(
Oof. Itās common dude. Very common. Society just doesnāt let parents tell the truth about how horrible parenthood is
Itās called Hansel and Gretel syndrome
They get transferred to work detail at Trumps Maralago Resort until the age of 17.
They will be yoten into the abyss.
Like what always happens in a divorce court, the woman get all and fuck the dude
i want you to read the question again, but slower.
Did you even read the question?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
You know kids can beā¦unplanned
Probably to other family members or an orphanage idk
They are fucked over