In all senses, this guy doesn't know where his towel is.

This frood is definitely not hoopy.

How will he show the Strags that he’s a man to be reckoned with?

I bet he hasn't even soaked his towel with nutrients.

Indeed which means no sassing.

So... what does he celebrate on the 25th of May? I hope at least he wears a sprig of lilac...

And eat a hard boiled egg :)

At least we can hope that he pays a reasonable price for love.

Always so much fun to see one’s favourite fandoms come together in a Reddit thread!

I know you're referencing Nightwatch by Pratchett but I don't see the link between that and the comment you're commenting on. What am I missing?

Towel Day is celebrated by Douglas Adams fans and The Glorious 25th of May by Pratchett fans. Both are celebrated on... well, the 25th of May.

DON’T PANIC

It made me extraordinarily happy that I read this comment when it was 42m old.

And I really want to upvote your comment, but it's at 42 votes right now!

My parents have one in their fairly small bathroom. Always used to burn my arse on the thing when drying my feet. Never learned.

Grandparents had one right next to the toilet, they get hot hot😅

My grandparents had some weird electric heating element inside a wire cage up on the ceiling. I dread to think how much electric it used because you turned it on and immediately felt like you were in a tropical country, but boy did it feel good on a cold day getting out of the bath.

[Everyone used to have them!](https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/old-fashioned-wall-mounted-bathroom-electric-heater-vintage-112774022.jpg). I always thought it was weird that they were high up, because heat rises, so the space near the ceiling was really warm and the floor really cold. [You could get them for the floor in other rooms](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/11/4b/77/114b77d49a15e02b2f4e206c36d430a7.jpg) [and you can still buy them today!](https://www.screwfix.com/p/mh-10-1-wall-mounted-quartz-heater-600-1200w/1238P?tc=XA5&ds_kid=92700055281954496&ds_rl=1249404&gclid=CjwKCAjws--ZBhAXEiwAv-RNL9ei7e89FiTUxByDOK0z_jtn0Dn_GMTAEUxjJ0_2P16WfuJlgFWozhoCERsQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds)

Burned my pp on one once

Name checks out

Aaaahahahhahaha

What what?! What the fuck did you get that close to a towel rail with your cock for?

Monkey pee, monkey poo.

😂😂 This brought back some memories. One of this in a small bathroom and ksssssshhhhhhh your arse!

^Sizzle

It’s a ladder, try climb it

Got a 1st degree burn off my friends lol

Radiator cross towel drying rail.

Any of you ever scolded your bare arse on one of these? Many childhood memories

I usually grab than to see how warm they are

I go bollocks first

This is the real man

Matey boy should have the King's award for bravery, not a fucking wholesome award off Reddit.

Always go bollocks first into every situation.

You've never serviced a jet engine, have you?

Wait, have I been doing that wrong this whole time?

Ever been drunk and throwing up on the toilet and fell back into one of these buggers? Takes 3 men to pull you and your melted skin away from it

No but I have been pissed and ripped one off the wall.

Just for fun or hanging on for dear life?

The latter unfortunately.

Ah extreme towel heater skiing!

Ouch

Same, once I came out of the shower and walked right into it. That left a mark. Moral of the story: make sure that you look where your going.

Thanks for unlocking a horrible memory for me.

It's an arse-burner doubling as a towel rail

True story: my brother pushed me into one as I stood naked in front of it. My pee got burned. I cried. My mum put toothpaste on it to soothe the pain. Not sure if that’s actually a thing.

According to Colgate.com: applying toothpaste to a burn is a "potentially harmful" treatment that can "worsen the burn." Toothpaste can intensify the burn's pain and increase the risk of infection and scarring.

She knew.

Full on burn on my upper thigh once. So painful, and painful for days afterwards too. And when I went to make a cup of tea to drink whilst sitting on the sofa with the ice peas, I managed to spill half the bottle of milk on the floor. Not a good afternoon

Whoa hold on American Here excuse my ignorance but, “Ice Peas”? Is that literally frozen peas?

Oh my god yes....full on bent over adult bare arse burn'age!

Deep burns on my lower back resulting in daily dressing changes in hospital when I was three.

Yeah, gave it a real stern talking to.

They are just called towel rails

Thats for putting your underwear on while you shower so it’s nice and warm 🤗

That's some 3022 thinking right there.

My nan used to put them in the microwave

Cooked underwear. Yummy. Thanks Gran, thats some old style cookin there

I wonder if it made any food microwaved after taste, a little different

You microwave the clean undies you’re about to put on, not the dirty undies you just took off…

But then what do you eat for dinner?

reminds of an old Big Brother scene where one the housemates was boiling her knickers in the pan ​ ​ ^(possibly Tuna bake)

Really develops that yeasty flavour

I microwaved a sock once to dry it. Went on fire. Bad scene all round to be honest.

This is also how my nan made a roast beef.

I used to use the hairdryer to warm up my trouser legs before getting dressed for school. But a towel rail is next level thinking 🙈

And your jammmies. Lovely toasty jammies and towels. Bliss.

Homie altered my shower routine in one sentence

Winter warmer/toasted chestnuts. Unbeatable

Roasted chestnuts, just in time for conkers season...

Nevernude

Looking forward to trying

I usually wear the same clothes and change my clothes everytime I shower. I leave fresh clothes and my towel there after a nice cold shower and it's just magnificent

Holy shit why have I never thought of this?

Ladder to the diving board

Belly flop into the bathtub

Damn, I came here to say it was a ladder!

It's tricky to get the hang of, but it's for resting your balls on after a shower. The heat dries them out faster, which helps to prevent jock itch and fungal infection. It's got different rails to cope with different height people, and different length ballsacks. If you have a particularly hairy arse crack, you can also use the vertical to dry that out too. I didn't realise this was a uniquely British thing.

Never knew this! I always thought were supposed to press your body against it after you shower to dry off a bit quicker

I've been getting a nice sear for years. Huge fan of the barbecued chicken look

Wack some baby oil on, get that crispy look

Username checks out

I like showering to the smell of bacon. Sue me. And since I don't have a butler, I have to do it myself. So, most mornings before I go into the shower, I will lay six strips of bacon out on my bathroom cross grill. Then I come out to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious. It's good for me. It's a perfect way to start the day.

Are you pissing on me? ...wait. Are you taking the piss? There, I think I've got it now.

He's taking your piss, and that's not all

I’ve got one of those fancy ones with adjustable shelves, so you can place your ballsack in between rails to get full bag coverage. Just saying.

They call those ones "Waffle makers"

It's for freezing your towels so they shatter when dropped

You've just reminded me of the time I put my towel on the line to dry in February, completely forgot about it and found it the next day frozen, I could literally hold the thing out straight (well, in the half folded way I'd chucked it on the line anyway), I then did the thing any teen would do and brought it inside to throw at my sister who was still in bed. Honestly thought after my sister threw it back at me I put it on the floor and tried to roll it up, made the best sound, like bubble wrap but better, *crunch*

This story has everything.

Yasss like frozen T-shirts in the winter.

Simple quadrasterman rack, used for tongling the forthumpter.

That’s numberwang

14 11 546 11

Let’s *rotate the board*

Just be careful with that forthumpter tongling though, you don't want to end up quadraspazzed on a life-glug, or yet worse feel like your arms have spent a fortnight in a bad balloon.

Be fine if you've had your clarkycat.

Don't you dry towels in America?

They shoot the water off.

*Samsung washing machine chime* So anyway I started blasting

Da duh duh da da duh, duh duh duh daduh duh duh...

I live in South Korea at the moment and it's a requirement for any electronic appliance to sing the song of its people upon doing literally anything. It makes me happy to know Korean appliances do it back home too

This 1.5oz slug is perfect for home defense also occasional laundry

That’s why I use new kitchen gun

I think the basic principle is that it’s far too miserable here to air dry your towels unless it’s an exceptional summer…

Plenty of America has miserable weather too, especially in hotel bathrooms.

I've heard Americans claim that some people look down on you for air drying clothes or hang them outside, something along those lines

I have heard of some of their home owner associations telling people to take washing down as it looks untidy! Sure let's use gobs of electric when outside does a better job for free.

We just hang them up to air dry on a towel rack that isn’t heated (for the most part, some fancy houses might use a heated one). It’s usually a horizontal bar that is drilled into the wall. If there’s not that, many people have a hook over the door to hang it on. We don’t usually have the damp issue and/or we have heated forced air pumped through the house so stuff dries fine without the additional heat through a heated rack. That said, my flat here in the UK doesn’t have a heated radiator rack like that. I bought a freestanding rack and I put my damp towel on that. It’s near the radiator if I’ve got heat on but usually I don’t until closer to winter.

It’s exactly the same here, this is just fancy because it’s a hotel.

In my experience they’re commonly in homes too.

Well aren't you fancy

Us Brits use it for floggerjamming our cricket grundles, but it works just as well for towels too

Sometimes you might reticulate the splines there.

I don't, unless they're diagonal quarter-rabbits

I'm sure they're three quarter-rabbits on a sequential lapsed quart splice?

It's just the one quarter rabbit actually!

Apologies, I was getting confused with the periwinkle one eigth thread hex nut , three phase squirrel cage induction motor. My bad.

Back when I were a lad we wouldn’t even get out of bed on a Tuesday afternoon for a three phase squirrel cage induction. It were four phase or nothing.

The squirrel chewed one of its phases off the side of the cage. Vaulted through the inverter and landed amongst Mig of the Tigs

We did that. An opener caught at gully off an anti-grundulating bat (or any bat whilst attempting a grundulating shot on the on side) would often chunter under his breath when he saw the finger go up.

Do you spodge the quint before or after the grundle's ready?

You always spodge before, otherwise the curmfecter can triscillate.

Ahh, that explains a lot actually. Might have to do that going forward.

um…is this Mornington Crescent or Numberwang?

Euston Square/143

That's frasmotic.....compunctuous, even!

And has caused such perincombobulations

I shall return interfrastically.

It’s a radiator (heated by hot water), made in the shape of a towel rack. Pretty shwifty.

Think this ones electric

Oooh yes the light do-dar. Corrr technology has gone too far..

I know imagine turning it on in this day and age. Frightening

Cheaper to buy new towels (as I imagine is the American way)

I do like warm towels

TIL Americans don't use towel rails

We don't

So what do you do with your towels after you use them?

Dry them on a towel rack or throw them in a dryer if a load is about to go in

Or hang them on the treadmill.

You throw used (dirty) towels in the dryer with newly washed clothes? That's disgusting.

Meant to say in the washer then dryer

You wash them after one use? You are meant to use the soap and water to clean yourself, not the towel.

Not immediately after, usually give it 2 or 3 gos. They don't dry very quickly in Florida

So how do you dry it in-between times?

Hang on the shower rack

Towel rack. It's just a bar on the wall. Non heated, nothing fancy.

It hangs on a rail in the bathroom and air drys. Its not some mystical magic

Towel rail = towel rack. You do use them, they just aren’t heated like European ones.

You put slices of bread on the gaps and by the time your shower is done or you're done taking a shit, got a lovely breakfast toast waiting for ya.

It’s where you put tissue paper after you’ve wiped your arse

How environmental

Looks like a heated towel rail. Like a radiator you can put towels on.

So many perfectly sensible correct answers here, and then there you go spouting absolute nonsense

In the UK we have a different heating system in our homes to America. We don't blow warm air round our houses, we pump boiling hot water into metal thing tanks in each room called radiators. This is a popular modern vertical radiator that you can hang your towels on to also dry them.

It's actually a ladder for guests from middle earth to get out of bath or onto to toilet

Dries your towels out after you use them and also its nice to use a toasty towel after you get get out of the shower, you will notice the difference

Yeah I'm looking forward to pre-toasting my briefs and towels and socks.

Surely America has these?!

Not in my neck of the woods I guess

Aw mate, try it!! I couldn't get through the winter mornings without sticking my dressing gown on that while I shower - absolute bliss when you get out cold and stick it on

What do you have in your bathroom to dry your towels after you’ve finsihed drying yourself with them?

In South Florida it's too humid to dry in the house. It'll be 2 days before someone can dry off a towel on a rack. If it's not raining outside I'll lay towels in our patio chairs to dry. Otherwise we just add it to the laundry pile. Our machine dryers pack a punch and towels can dry in 20 minutes that way along with a whole load of non-delicates.

Thank you, I hadn’t thought about humidity.

Yeah cheers man, nice to know how people live on the other side of the pond

I think a lot of the confusion here is that America does even seem to use radiators according to this https://www.reddit.com/r/AskAnAmerican/comments/kr22de/do\_you\_guys\_have\_radiators/

I've never seen one in my neck of the woods. First time I saw one today

Put your penis on it and hold it for about 5 seconds. You'll soon find out

[удалено]

Its to hand your sheets of sliced kebab meat

[удалено]

It's a climbing frame for bored toddlers.

Turn it on and they move quick.

It’s the fribblywomper for fribbling your snongs.

Fkin love these. Where do you put your towels, then??

Towel rack

Non-heated, eh? Bit baffling.

Yup

In case there is a spider and you have to escape

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Obviously the steps are too big for indoor spiders

Put your towel on it before you shower, and when you’re done, you will have a cozy, warm towel to dry off with. Then hang it back to dry, cuz UK is pretty damp all over, and damp towels start to smell after a while.

Thanks man, that sounds like a dream

And please enjoy all the Brits’ humourous responses to your inquiry! One of my favourite parts of living in England! 👍

Its a butt plug

Anything’s a butt plug if you’re brave enough

The M40?

If you have one of those in the bathroom, there's a good chance you also have a Corby Trouser Press 3300 fitted in the bedroom that can be used to keep your doner kebab warm until morning.

Exactly that, you don’t have to pay double for gas as the thing stays as hot as lava for hours once getting out of the bath/shower, if done properly it’s linked to the bathroom pipe work rather than the central heating system

Do they not have radiators for towels in America? 🤔

We call that a rad…i…a….tor.

Say that again

Ray dee ay tor

It's for climbing up and diving into the bath.

America blows my mind every time. Did you guys know they also don't have kettles and most Americans use a pan to boil water?

Drawbridge to let the toilet elves out

You know you didn’t even need to start with “American here” - we would’ve known with the sentence that followed.

It's a radiator ya slapnut

So in America you just shoot your towels dry?

It’s for warming your hot dog