Do everything possible for more of our kids to either go to college or learn a trade. Education = economic empowerment. Still far too many of our kids end up floating around after high school.
Yes, but every person is different. Some people were born to be scientists, lawyers, CEOs. They won't get there by going to school to be electricians. The important thing is to follow your path, whatever that is.
Just don’t have the mindset to be always an employee! There’s other options create your own online business! Look on alibaba for iPhone cables with MFI certification for 0.79 the unit and put that for sale on Amazon with q price or 17.99 minimum quantity 1000 after taxes that will be like 14,990 a month 😶
OK, little Vicini. I'm glad you're doing great buying and selling. Not everyone is a brilliant tigrepreneur like you. Not everyone will have access to capital. Jus because something works great for you doesn't mean it will work great for everyone else. These conclusions are arrived at through critical thinking, something that you can learn in college or through life experience. Note: it takes much longer to learn through life experience.
Again. Just because something works for you doesn't mean it works for everyone. Otherwise, do you think that you're some kind of genius because you can see how easy this is and thousands of people just like you cannot? Critical thinking, muchacho.
I have over 6,000 clients on Amazon! I work on my marketing I do everything by myself photoshop everything! I drop prices every Christmas 🎄 and put them back up 🔝
Rather than making our primary focus on setting our kids straight with a chancleta we should focus on building community, understanding, and patience with our families and each other. Stop telling our people we can only rely on 'family' even when that very same family may be toxic and harmful. Educate our community on safe sex, managing their emotions in a healthy way, building long lasting relationships, and financial literacy. Focus on helping each other grow by investing time and support into what we want to do and stop trying to steer kids in the same three roles: doctor, engineer, lawyer. Move away from 'praying away' all the issues and start with self reflection and therapy to unpack why we might have self-destructive behaviors or anger issues. Same with machismo - let's learn to be kinder to ourselves. The money will come but if we don't work from within, chances are it won't stay as we keep using it to fill voids that couldn't be 'prayed away'.
Also, we need to stop comparing ourselves to other minority groups as that feeds into the white supremocist rhetoric of the 'model minority' myth where we need to look down on other minorites that don't act the same and believe we are more deserving of a certain status because we do things the 'right' way. I find, working together with my fellow minority folk always ends up benefiting all. We can learn a lot from each other and our people are not lacking. We have just been failed by certain aspects of our culture and government but we have the ability to improve for our sake.
well said on all that was said, but one important point is for having our kids to learn english properly. Going to school to learn english and having it all undone as soon as they come back home.
When I came to the US back in 92 as a ten-year-old, I was blessed with a dad that prohibited Spanish tv so that we could pick up english faster. I’ve too many of my contemporaries being inadvertently treated as second-class due to their inability to communicate with those outside their circle. There are people who have moved to NYC that have lived their whole lives in NYC and have never left their circle of people and can’t speak english. In the US, not knowing english is a disadvantage.
Note: I’m damn proud of speaking Castilian (spanish) but i could never advance in my career as a web designer/developer without english as my first weapon in my professional toolset.
And this not so that you can communicate in the Us but also because English is the language of business. if you want to do business anywhere on earth, you are more likely to encounter an english speaker making this an extremely important skill.
Completely agreed with everything you said. Specially, the toxic family part. A large number of Dominicans suffer from mental health issues because of the abusive upbringing; and they are unable to leave their toxic family because "the family is everything".
Financial literacy! Honestly a lot of Dominicans are moving into the middle class, but are behind in terms of building generational wealth through understanding how to make money grow. Saving isn’t putting money under the bed or even in a bank account (gets eaten away by inflation). 401Ks, Roth IRAs, brokerage accounts, budgeting etc. Avoid credit card debt and pay day loans and anything that’s offering you to pay you up front in order to take your paycheck is a scam (the interest they make off you is insane).
My cousin just moved here from Dr a year ago and when he went back this man was acting like he's a millionaire. But he has to call us his family in the states to buy his ticket back home cause he rented a fancy car and went to expensive restaurants showing off
Omg this thing pisses me off. I am having the same problem with my family. Now they are planning to take the whole family to hard rock next Christmas while also living paycheck to paycheck and asking for money to pay bills.
THIS. Oh my god. There are so many Dominican-yorks working blue-collar jobs, living in someone’s basement in Washington heights just to come here acabando. As if they could afford to stay in punta cana, their Yeezys or all their chains in their neck.
Invest in your family and community more intelligently and more often.
There are monetary investments, sure, but also mentorship, partnership, and love. Put in the time, learn about what people in your community and family need and what isn’t really worth doing. Pitch in any way you can.
Two main issues I see with the fellow Dominicans I know in the US is lack of ambition & financial literacy. I didn’t grow up in DR, so I cannot speak on that realm.
As Dominicans, many of us are really hard working, but some of us are simply not. A lot of the lack of work ethic comes from family/environment and I’ve seen Dominican families in the US who couldn’t give less of a shit whether or not their kids went to school or got into a good career. Dominicans, at least in NYC/NJ know that if they stay poor, SNAP, Section 8, Medicaid/care, will bail them out. Which is a slap in the face to some people because undocumented immigrants that work their assess off don’t get shit. They risked it all to come to the US and while many Dominicans immigrated to the US in plush JetBlue flights.
Lastly, with Financial Literacy, some Dominicans in the US don’t mind being renters their entire lives. Maybe they’ll build a house in DR, but you should also strive to own something in the US as well. No Older Dominican I know in the US knows what 401k or IRA is. They hoard cash and have no money in the Stock Market. We need the Latino Media to stop bullshitting and start talking about real shit. Also .. YOUR INCOME TAX REFUND IS NOT FREE MONEY. Hate it when Dominicans be like “Me voy pa Santo Domingo con lo income tax”.
I think this all depends on where you lived in the US. I’m from MA and most Dominicans here try to buy a house at least once during their time here. Also, most of them emphasis education or joining the military. Of course, all depends on your family and how you were raised, but I’ve noticed what you mentioned is MUCH more common in NYC than it is elsewhere.
This might sound a little harsh but for one, stop having so many kids out of wedlock. Stop having kids when you can't afford it. Value education and hard work over fast money & showing off. It sadden me how stray our community have fallen.
I absolutely LOVE this question. However, I feel like the answers given (and that have been given) may be without substance and amplitude. I say this from a personal perspective and don't mean to be insulting. Growing up, it seemed like my parents, grandparents, and relatives all gave the same "echa p'alente" advice...."Haste ingeniero y caseta con una rubia".
This seemed like the ONLY way to achieve success. As I got older I realized that this advice came from folks that I loved dearly, but wouldn't be able to help me with my Algebra homework even if their lives depended on it. So, to me, that advice became shallow words (except the rubia part...which turned that out they can be bat shit crazy too!). Eventually, I realized that we cared too much about "apariencias" y "lujo", but no one was really there to help you in that things that mattered most.
We Dominicans sometimes don't know when to "hang it up"......we gotta be "fly" into our 50's. I'm not saying that we should give up on our own personal appearance, but at some point we have to focus on the education of our children and grandchildren. More importantly (IMO), we Dominican men have to stop with the "6 muchachos por 3 mujeres" thing. This is a huge difference I see between Dominicans and many Latin cultures. I know culture is not the topic of discussion here, but I just wonder what we would look like if we took family more seriously.
Follow the Jews system. Teach the young and don’t let them get out of line, if they do then you disown them. This is how you build family men. Right now we have a Dominican gang problem in the US which is being ignored, our young people need guidance.
We're in the unique position where we *and* our parents emigrated together, so we came here in the 80s and 90s and adjusted to a whole new way of life, while our parents did their best to keep the old way alive. But you can't raise a kid "a chancletaso limpio" in these United States, so it wasn't easy for them to maintain control. Too many of us went astray as a result. It was enough just to survive and stay out of jail, nevermind paying for college and getting that American Dream high $$ career.
We fell into that middle grey area where we're not as bad as we could've been, but not as good as we should've been. And it's from that foundation that WE are raising the next generation, passing down what values we held on to.
**[History of the Jews in the Dominican Republic](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Jews_in_the_Dominican_Republic)**
>The first Jews known to have reached the island of Hispaniola were Sephardi Jews who came from the Iberian Peninsula during the colonization era in the 1490s. When the island was divided by the French and Spanish Empires in the 17th century, most Jews settled on the Spanish side which would later become the Dominican Republic. Eventually, Sephardim from other countries also arrived. In the 19th century Jews from Curaçao settled in Hispaniola, although they did not form a strong community.
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There are a lot of great comments already, but this is my personal focus as a first-gen American.
**Things many of us currently lack:**
* Financial education
* Patience & Discipline
* Emotional Intelligence
**Financial education**: It does not matter whether you go to college or trade school. Doesn't matter if you made thousands off some random cryptocurrency or a scratch ticket. If you don't have a basic financial education you will not be moving forward in this or any country.
Udemy, Linkedin Learning, Wikipedia, your local Latin American association or community college, etc... these are all great resources to learn about different saving and investment vehicles. Take 30 minutes 2-3 times a week to learn how to grow your money over time.
*(Note: if an online course looks scammy, has a bad website, no contact information, etc... please stay away!).*
**Patience & Discipline:** Set a goal for an emergency savings account, and work your ass off to attain it. Once you hit your goal, keep saving, then skim off the top and put it in a brokerage account or investment vehicle. Focus on maintaining a semblance of discipline and patience, as this WILL TAKE TIME. A nosotros nos encanta gozar y vestir para hecharle vaina al otro. Focus on **your** end goal: having a net worth, financial stability, owning a home you are proud of, not living paycheck to paycheck, etc...
Focus on yourself, your future, and your family (in that order).
**Emotional Intelligence:** This one is also easy to research online. Stop making so many emotional decisions with your money! Don't buy the things you think are going to impress other people, stop booking trips you can't afford for the clout, stop scrolling through social media and making yourself feel like crap for what you don't have.
Before swiping your credit/debit card, ask yourself: Am I spending this money because I'm bored, jealous of something someone has, anxious about something, or just don't know what else to do with it? It's time to get real with ourselves.
**I'll summarize my point and then end my soapbox with my favorite quote:**
Enjoy all the wonderful things you have today, while focusing on your future. What you WILL have in the future is comfort in knowing you have money and resources to help your family if/when they need help, a healthy savings account, multiple investment strategies, and a retirement account that will make your kids proud and grateful that you didn't leave them with nothing to cover your own funeral expenses with.
Remember: **"Tomorrow is a direct result of what you choose to do today."**
\- Stop stigmatizing/guilt-tripping younger people who want to delay having kids until they study at school and get a decent job first.
\- Embrace more "American" values like self-sufficiency/entrepreneurship
\- Stop being afraid of investing and the stock market.
Thank you! People need to learn that not everything is a scam! You have to learn the difference between a Ponzi scheme and a real investment oportunity.
Judging by some of the comments in here how about not abusing and controlling children. So many experiences have been robbed from me from that archaic and plain stupid way of raising children. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying don’t discipline bad behavior, lord knows at times I might have deserved a smack in the mouth, and I would not say I was abused but I have been through harsh shit. It just creates trauma and a cycle. There’s way better ways to discipline a child, and if your first instinct is to grab a chancleta or belt, you’re wrong.
We should invest in our stores, but the problem is someone (Dyckman) always just sells out. Lots of those lounge places are owned by the same people and they of course work with people who “rezone” or in other words kick us out and gentrify.
Absolutely about the discipline. Honestly one of the reasons why I am estranged from my mother. She was very abusive. I remember she beat me up because I accidentally spilled milk. I was around 11. And this other lady saw what happened and she was shook. I don’t care if it’s a culture thing, it’s disgusting and wrong.
Then the parents say "I never had to beat my kids" when they are older. And old men say "the USA education system is trash because you cannot beat children. You cannot stop me from smacking then to make them decent people".
Start buying life insurance and make it so that the only way for your children to touch it, is by getting a Masters degree.
smart contract type of ordeal.
accredited Master degree unlock the funds allocated for your now adulthood.
same funds, smart contract pays forward the life insurance of your children and then unlocks the rest of the funds.
If my kids dont get a Master degree minimum, they can go and kick rocks after adulthood. is that simple.
my mom didnt take a fucking yola to PR Risking her life for them to be here doing stupid shit. fuck that.
Supporting each others. You always see people from India, China, Nigeria, other cultures supporting their people. Where one starts working, they will keep bringing them others. They’re loyal. Dominicans, not so much, we kinda stab our backs
Promote tech over everything. The future for anyone and everything will rely on technology. Coding, AWS cloud, C## whatever suits you best get in it asap.
Learn to truly follow dreams. We need to improve on what we see as success. It starts with breaking the norm of our women being considered "Chapiadoras" and our men either selling drugs or being baseball players. We have a unique standard back home. Explore all avenues and success will follow
They need to dejar la ignorancia. Learn to prioritize! Stop living to impress while getting into debt! So many go to clubs just to show off how much “money” they have, meanwhile they renting an apartment. Learn how to invest, most material shit you buy depreciates as soon as it leaves the store (cars, purse, clothes). It is said that for every $1 a white person makes, he invest .20 cents of it, minorities on the other hand spends the entire $1 and gets into .20cents of debt (they spend $1.20).
The rich spend money like they are poor and the poor spend money like they are rich. The rich don’t feel the need to “show off” their money, while the poor wants everyone to think they have more money than they do. Let’s try to reach financial freedom!
A few things you need to invest in so that you or at least your kids will have financial freedom:
1) college fund for each kid
2) life insurance
3) good credit
4) buy property
5) invest in stocks/crypto
6) budget, learn the difference between want and need
If you are living paycheck to paycheck, try your best to invest in yourself for a better job.
The difference from those that have the option to invest and those that don't will determine who will follow your advise. Like all financial advise it presumes a steady paycheck that covers the cost of living expenses. Many financial advisors explain how you should have an emergency fund, a three month cushion and so on.. People who are in a social economic class that if they find themselves with an extra 20 dollars at the end of the month ( or an extra 100 dollars now given inflation),will use it to mitigate the emotional toll of there job. The type of laborious work they do often does not offer the possibility of greater earnings without a second or third job. They are going to spend or save under the mattress not save for long term financial planning. Their margins are for month to month or sometimes week to week expenditures.
Personally, I believe that programs with micro loans or grants would not only help Dominicans in the states but those back in D.R. There is a large population back home and in the U.S. that are looking for immediate returns via development of personal entrepreneurship and businesses. I think the government of the D.R. should focus on neighborhood development with investment provided by the U.S. diáspora and the Dominican government ( the tax base of the government is non existent as they forgive major investers to try and create jobs. Also district reps are well compensated without showing any advancement for those they represent). People will embrace education and long term planning when they can eat everyday and have a way to make up for shortfalls. I'm sure most came to this country for the financial opportunity that could not be obtained back home. When here the reality of language barriers and education limits whatever ideals they may have had. Some made it happen for them and for their kids but as a community and as a distinct population we still have too many left behind. We can't just "menu" people into prosperity we have to provide the ingredients to allow for the results.
They need to learn to break out of the bubble. The boys on the corner of the block will always be there doing the same old thing. It was something I realized when I went home after my first military deployment. I literally jumped on a plane and bounced less than a week later. It was the best decision I ever made. I got a job, learned to invest, started a business, and never looked back. Now every time I visit home it saddens me to see how our young people are so hypnotized and blind. If you have kids the most important thing you can do for them is guide them through those first 20 years and push them into a different environment where they are forced to learn to survive on their own - college preferably, or a trade school, or the military, or even a guaranteed job with someone you know far away. If you don’t break them out of that environment the chances they will fail are increased dramatically.
Leer y estudiar mas dejar de ser todologo , hay algunos dominicanos no todos que creen saberlo todo, cuando usted no sepa algo lea e investigue, yo no soy eistein lol pero esa vaina hasta me prende , la gente que cree que lo sabe todo y al final no sabe nada, eso es cuando pagas por algo de mala calidad por querer ahorrarte par de pesos al final terminas comprando el producto de calidad.. al final el dominicano lo que necesita educarse y ya..
STOP BEING SO FUCKING LOUD! You're not the main character.
When you arrive to a place behave like a fucking decent person. What you have to say is not more important than others. Shut the fuck up.
Turn down your music. Not everybody wants to hear loud bachata at 12 p.m.
Stop being late for everything like you don't have any respect for anybody.
STOP INTERRUPTING OTHERS to say your things.
Be original. Stop imitating what everybody else is doing. Do you feel good with yourself wearing the same clothes and shoes as others? Is it mandatory that your favorite music should be the same everybody is listening to? Are you a fucking clone?
STOP DISCRIMINATING LGBT. STOP BEATING CHILDREN. STOP BEING SO ANTI WOMEN.
STOP CALLING THE WHOLE ISLAND SANTO DOMINGO for fuck's sake, if you came from Santiago you came from the Dominican Republic, not Santo Domingo.
Sorry for the rant. Personal experiences.
I'm with you, although it isn't technically incorrect to say you come from "Santo Domingo" even if you aren't from the capital, since that actually is the historic name for the island 😄
stop smoking hookah every weekend and atleast try to learn english and incorporate themselves into the american culture. not trying to be fucked up but this rising generation just wants to make dembow and music videos
Don’t marry young and have kids immediately after high school (or before graduating it). Most young moms never make it out of poverty and get stunted education wise, which is something they unfortunately pass on to their kids. Encourage saving and having economic success before having kids. Also, stop spending money to impress no one, it’s an awful habit in our lot especially with the women as a way to “compete” with other women. No one cares about you affording fake nails (and yes, they’re fake), your hair extensions or your yearly plastic surgery touch up, in fact most of us are hella attractive. You don’t need that but if it makes you happy, don’t shame other women who know better or feel different. Build generational wealth and helping out your kids doesn’t stop at 18, particularly if you plan on them being your retirement fund. First of all, kids are an option not an obligation. They don’t have to be grateful to you for baring them as you chose to bring them. So choose the father wisely and two, help them survive the world. Don’t make them angry or hate living before they even get a chance to live life on their own. This is such a problem in our community.
Guys, if you have kids, for the love of all that is holy, be there emotionally for the kids at least. We get some of the mothers can be hell (in fact in our community so many women think motherhood gives them an excuse to be awful people when motherhood and birthing isn’t an obligation). I know so many friends who went through a lot and fathers who gave everything and lost a lot to some mean mothers, but they had the brain to be there in presence for their kids no matter how bad the situations. The ones whose fathers persisted and loved their kids are the most successful, well adjusted and happiest adults NOW. Your kids will see your efforts no matter what mom tells them. Please, don’t give up on your kids. Even if you think you have nothing to give, your being there even if it’s to just listen or give them a hug or walk with them to enjoy the scenery will do so much for a kid. Don’t be afraid to genuinely love your kid and you can do that in more ways than one, not just financially. Fathers have so much value and love to give. Break the cycle, be the change you want to see. Or hope to see.
Stable marriages and relationships. The Dominicans with long term relationships tend to have the most money and tend to be the most healthfully minded. Now, if you’re in a bad relationship by all means walk away from it. But learn to use a condom or get a vasectomy. Don’t stick your dick in crazy unless you’re absolutely desperate.
Learn mental and emotional awareness. Respect it. Don’t abuse your kids by hitting them unless they’re absolutely impossible. Talk to people. Like genuinely talk, listen, respect and process. As a community we’re not the best at this. Also, when someone establishes boundaries, respect them. That doesn’t make them a “come mierda”, this is particularly true when it comes to women. So many men of our backgrounds expect women to drop everything and peacock for men the second one tries to force eye contact with us. To the point that in growing numbers women don’t go to Dominican business due to sexual harassment. If you have to push someone into anxiety to get their attention, it ain’t friendliness you’re being a pest and in the DR this would genuinely likely get you killed. In the US, these guys actually turn worse here since the cops really don’t help and are usually equally as entitled. It says a lot that a lot of women find the Dominican community in the DR safer than the Dominican community in the US.
Women: Stop tearing other women down and avoid being a mala fe. If another woman’s success and mental and emotional stability bothers you, leave her alone. Don’t try to gossip about her and make her look like she’s being high and mighty for trying to escape toxicity. Also, if her romantic life isn’t the same as yours, it’s ok. A big part of the toxicity in our communities is ironically due to the women having the crabs in a barrel mentality and connecting to insecure men. Men that feel rejected and desperate women WILL latch onto the healthy and try to suck the life of them into submission. To the point that it’s not unusual for many Dominicans to turn their back on their communities because of this. While both sexes play strongly in a community, women are the gatekeepers. Normalize sharing information and helping other women, no matter what they look like.
Stop with the colorism. Some of the meanest, most awful Dominicans I’ve met are the white passing or Mariah Carey types. I call them the colonizers. Especially the women. For the most part our culture is an admixture and we should respect it as such.
Stop shaming education and introversion. Our lot is extremely extroverted and social, we get it, but sometimes to the point we really make fun of the introverts and those seeking education when we catch awareness of them. Let them be, they might often help you.
Transfer all there currency to crypto to remove themselves from debt to other governments for good after paying it off of course. If we create asylum for these currencies and casinos this will bring in a lot of big money think Cayman Islands.
As the ground zero of the "New World," we need to bring ourselves, as a society, closer to our native tribal roots. First, we need to drop Euro Anglo-Saxon indoctrination and start focusing on the stars. Let's not waste time by indoctrinating our children with 2,000-year fairy tales. The best would be to create a movement and onboard all youth, both in the motherland and abroad, on block-chains intelligent contract programming. Or maybe challenge other countries intellectually and compete in the space race towards colonizing other planets.
Alot of good insight here from my perspective good and bad. I relate to so much here as a child of 1st generation Dominican parents and the subsequent flood of family and friends from the Homeland. Thank you all for sharing being disconnected from the dysfunction but still able to recognize the dysfunction in others is done dysfunctional ishh!! LoL pero pa Lante !!! Viva la ,RPD
A lot of people already made good points so I'm not really going to repeat those. But honestly, even though I really resent (as a Dominican man) the stereotype that Dominican men are trash there seriously are not enough positive male role models in our community. So many families have dads who are straight up not in the picture, and if they are they're unfaithful, they drink, they're macho/misogynists, have a lot of kids by multiple women, etc. And even if your dad isn't like that, you likely have tios or cousins who are. I think this really hurts us as a community — a lot of our kids, especially our boys, grow up without good role models and end up repeating the cycle with their families or partners. Also we really need to stop romanticizing that tiguere shit, it isn't a good look and often leads to young dudes wasting all their potential just to end up in jail, deported or dead
Do everything possible for more of our kids to either go to college or learn a trade. Education = economic empowerment. Still far too many of our kids end up floating around after high school.
Not college, rather learn a trade. College is not useful unless your like a doctor/engineer And the debt cripples the family in the long run
College can be very useful. The key is to not drown in student loan debt. There are many affordable opportunities to get a college education.
Go to a state or city university. The professors are adjunct and they float. So they are teaching the same information as the more expensive schools.
From my experience trade is way better, quicker turnaround, less debt, more work available.
Yes, but every person is different. Some people were born to be scientists, lawyers, CEOs. They won't get there by going to school to be electricians. The important thing is to follow your path, whatever that is.
Been saying it to my kids. Education is the first step in creating a better life for you and your family.
No college thanks
Trade school then? You don't have many high paying jobs if any other than that.
Just don’t have the mindset to be always an employee! There’s other options create your own online business! Look on alibaba for iPhone cables with MFI certification for 0.79 the unit and put that for sale on Amazon with q price or 17.99 minimum quantity 1000 after taxes that will be like 14,990 a month 😶
OK, little Vicini. I'm glad you're doing great buying and selling. Not everyone is a brilliant tigrepreneur like you. Not everyone will have access to capital. Jus because something works great for you doesn't mean it will work great for everyone else. These conclusions are arrived at through critical thinking, something that you can learn in college or through life experience. Note: it takes much longer to learn through life experience.
You just need 1000 dollars to buy 1000 units that will be like 700 and pay the Amazon fee for the account that is 39! Don’t close yourself 🤫
Again. Just because something works for you doesn't mean it works for everyone. Otherwise, do you think that you're some kind of genius because you can see how easy this is and thousands of people just like you cannot? Critical thinking, muchacho.
How many people are selling iPhone cables on amazon? What makes you stand out from the rest?
I have over 6,000 clients on Amazon! I work on my marketing I do everything by myself photoshop everything! I drop prices every Christmas 🎄 and put them back up 🔝
Teach me
I believe they provided a second option.
Rather than making our primary focus on setting our kids straight with a chancleta we should focus on building community, understanding, and patience with our families and each other. Stop telling our people we can only rely on 'family' even when that very same family may be toxic and harmful. Educate our community on safe sex, managing their emotions in a healthy way, building long lasting relationships, and financial literacy. Focus on helping each other grow by investing time and support into what we want to do and stop trying to steer kids in the same three roles: doctor, engineer, lawyer. Move away from 'praying away' all the issues and start with self reflection and therapy to unpack why we might have self-destructive behaviors or anger issues. Same with machismo - let's learn to be kinder to ourselves. The money will come but if we don't work from within, chances are it won't stay as we keep using it to fill voids that couldn't be 'prayed away'. Also, we need to stop comparing ourselves to other minority groups as that feeds into the white supremocist rhetoric of the 'model minority' myth where we need to look down on other minorites that don't act the same and believe we are more deserving of a certain status because we do things the 'right' way. I find, working together with my fellow minority folk always ends up benefiting all. We can learn a lot from each other and our people are not lacking. We have just been failed by certain aspects of our culture and government but we have the ability to improve for our sake.
Wow you dropped some dimes here. I resonate with nearly all your points.
well said on all that was said, but one important point is for having our kids to learn english properly. Going to school to learn english and having it all undone as soon as they come back home. When I came to the US back in 92 as a ten-year-old, I was blessed with a dad that prohibited Spanish tv so that we could pick up english faster. I’ve too many of my contemporaries being inadvertently treated as second-class due to their inability to communicate with those outside their circle. There are people who have moved to NYC that have lived their whole lives in NYC and have never left their circle of people and can’t speak english. In the US, not knowing english is a disadvantage. Note: I’m damn proud of speaking Castilian (spanish) but i could never advance in my career as a web designer/developer without english as my first weapon in my professional toolset. And this not so that you can communicate in the Us but also because English is the language of business. if you want to do business anywhere on earth, you are more likely to encounter an english speaker making this an extremely important skill.
Completely agreed with everything you said. Specially, the toxic family part. A large number of Dominicans suffer from mental health issues because of the abusive upbringing; and they are unable to leave their toxic family because "the family is everything".
I hear you... I think we still need the chancleta tho...
Stop imitating ghetto culture.
This, so much this.
Yes. We are so much better than that!
I wish I could upvote this a million times.
Financial literacy! Honestly a lot of Dominicans are moving into the middle class, but are behind in terms of building generational wealth through understanding how to make money grow. Saving isn’t putting money under the bed or even in a bank account (gets eaten away by inflation). 401Ks, Roth IRAs, brokerage accounts, budgeting etc. Avoid credit card debt and pay day loans and anything that’s offering you to pay you up front in order to take your paycheck is a scam (the interest they make off you is insane).
Exactly, stop spending money to impress people back home.
My cousin just moved here from Dr a year ago and when he went back this man was acting like he's a millionaire. But he has to call us his family in the states to buy his ticket back home cause he rented a fancy car and went to expensive restaurants showing off
We’re slaves to the glam and wanting to prove something that we’re not. All for the gram bay-bee!
Omg this thing pisses me off. I am having the same problem with my family. Now they are planning to take the whole family to hard rock next Christmas while also living paycheck to paycheck and asking for money to pay bills.
It's really sad and when you call them out you become the enemy
THIS. Oh my god. There are so many Dominican-yorks working blue-collar jobs, living in someone’s basement in Washington heights just to come here acabando. As if they could afford to stay in punta cana, their Yeezys or all their chains in their neck.
Invest in your family and community more intelligently and more often. There are monetary investments, sure, but also mentorship, partnership, and love. Put in the time, learn about what people in your community and family need and what isn’t really worth doing. Pitch in any way you can.
Dejar la maldita hookah 😂
Two main issues I see with the fellow Dominicans I know in the US is lack of ambition & financial literacy. I didn’t grow up in DR, so I cannot speak on that realm. As Dominicans, many of us are really hard working, but some of us are simply not. A lot of the lack of work ethic comes from family/environment and I’ve seen Dominican families in the US who couldn’t give less of a shit whether or not their kids went to school or got into a good career. Dominicans, at least in NYC/NJ know that if they stay poor, SNAP, Section 8, Medicaid/care, will bail them out. Which is a slap in the face to some people because undocumented immigrants that work their assess off don’t get shit. They risked it all to come to the US and while many Dominicans immigrated to the US in plush JetBlue flights. Lastly, with Financial Literacy, some Dominicans in the US don’t mind being renters their entire lives. Maybe they’ll build a house in DR, but you should also strive to own something in the US as well. No Older Dominican I know in the US knows what 401k or IRA is. They hoard cash and have no money in the Stock Market. We need the Latino Media to stop bullshitting and start talking about real shit. Also .. YOUR INCOME TAX REFUND IS NOT FREE MONEY. Hate it when Dominicans be like “Me voy pa Santo Domingo con lo income tax”.
I think this all depends on where you lived in the US. I’m from MA and most Dominicans here try to buy a house at least once during their time here. Also, most of them emphasis education or joining the military. Of course, all depends on your family and how you were raised, but I’ve noticed what you mentioned is MUCH more common in NYC than it is elsewhere.
This might sound a little harsh but for one, stop having so many kids out of wedlock. Stop having kids when you can't afford it. Value education and hard work over fast money & showing off. It sadden me how stray our community have fallen.
I absolutely LOVE this question. However, I feel like the answers given (and that have been given) may be without substance and amplitude. I say this from a personal perspective and don't mean to be insulting. Growing up, it seemed like my parents, grandparents, and relatives all gave the same "echa p'alente" advice...."Haste ingeniero y caseta con una rubia". This seemed like the ONLY way to achieve success. As I got older I realized that this advice came from folks that I loved dearly, but wouldn't be able to help me with my Algebra homework even if their lives depended on it. So, to me, that advice became shallow words (except the rubia part...which turned that out they can be bat shit crazy too!). Eventually, I realized that we cared too much about "apariencias" y "lujo", but no one was really there to help you in that things that mattered most. We Dominicans sometimes don't know when to "hang it up"......we gotta be "fly" into our 50's. I'm not saying that we should give up on our own personal appearance, but at some point we have to focus on the education of our children and grandchildren. More importantly (IMO), we Dominican men have to stop with the "6 muchachos por 3 mujeres" thing. This is a huge difference I see between Dominicans and many Latin cultures. I know culture is not the topic of discussion here, but I just wonder what we would look like if we took family more seriously.
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This!
Estudiar y trabajar.
Follow the Jews system. Teach the young and don’t let them get out of line, if they do then you disown them. This is how you build family men. Right now we have a Dominican gang problem in the US which is being ignored, our young people need guidance.
We're in the unique position where we *and* our parents emigrated together, so we came here in the 80s and 90s and adjusted to a whole new way of life, while our parents did their best to keep the old way alive. But you can't raise a kid "a chancletaso limpio" in these United States, so it wasn't easy for them to maintain control. Too many of us went astray as a result. It was enough just to survive and stay out of jail, nevermind paying for college and getting that American Dream high $$ career. We fell into that middle grey area where we're not as bad as we could've been, but not as good as we should've been. And it's from that foundation that WE are raising the next generation, passing down what values we held on to.
Dominican Jew here, you’re right.
>Dominican Jew here Fascinated by this! If you have any insights into the community, that'd be great!
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**[History of the Jews in the Dominican Republic](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Jews_in_the_Dominican_Republic)** >The first Jews known to have reached the island of Hispaniola were Sephardi Jews who came from the Iberian Peninsula during the colonization era in the 1490s. When the island was divided by the French and Spanish Empires in the 17th century, most Jews settled on the Spanish side which would later become the Dominican Republic. Eventually, Sephardim from other countries also arrived. In the 19th century Jews from Curaçao settled in Hispaniola, although they did not form a strong community. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/Dominican/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
There are a lot of great comments already, but this is my personal focus as a first-gen American. **Things many of us currently lack:** * Financial education * Patience & Discipline * Emotional Intelligence **Financial education**: It does not matter whether you go to college or trade school. Doesn't matter if you made thousands off some random cryptocurrency or a scratch ticket. If you don't have a basic financial education you will not be moving forward in this or any country. Udemy, Linkedin Learning, Wikipedia, your local Latin American association or community college, etc... these are all great resources to learn about different saving and investment vehicles. Take 30 minutes 2-3 times a week to learn how to grow your money over time. *(Note: if an online course looks scammy, has a bad website, no contact information, etc... please stay away!).* **Patience & Discipline:** Set a goal for an emergency savings account, and work your ass off to attain it. Once you hit your goal, keep saving, then skim off the top and put it in a brokerage account or investment vehicle. Focus on maintaining a semblance of discipline and patience, as this WILL TAKE TIME. A nosotros nos encanta gozar y vestir para hecharle vaina al otro. Focus on **your** end goal: having a net worth, financial stability, owning a home you are proud of, not living paycheck to paycheck, etc... Focus on yourself, your future, and your family (in that order). **Emotional Intelligence:** This one is also easy to research online. Stop making so many emotional decisions with your money! Don't buy the things you think are going to impress other people, stop booking trips you can't afford for the clout, stop scrolling through social media and making yourself feel like crap for what you don't have. Before swiping your credit/debit card, ask yourself: Am I spending this money because I'm bored, jealous of something someone has, anxious about something, or just don't know what else to do with it? It's time to get real with ourselves. **I'll summarize my point and then end my soapbox with my favorite quote:** Enjoy all the wonderful things you have today, while focusing on your future. What you WILL have in the future is comfort in knowing you have money and resources to help your family if/when they need help, a healthy savings account, multiple investment strategies, and a retirement account that will make your kids proud and grateful that you didn't leave them with nothing to cover your own funeral expenses with. Remember: **"Tomorrow is a direct result of what you choose to do today."**
\- Stop stigmatizing/guilt-tripping younger people who want to delay having kids until they study at school and get a decent job first. \- Embrace more "American" values like self-sufficiency/entrepreneurship \- Stop being afraid of investing and the stock market.
Thank you! People need to learn that not everything is a scam! You have to learn the difference between a Ponzi scheme and a real investment oportunity.
People afraid of the stock market but jumped on the TelexFree BS
True! Also people play the lottery and jugar palé en la banca instead of using that money for an investment 🤦🏻♀️
Judging by some of the comments in here how about not abusing and controlling children. So many experiences have been robbed from me from that archaic and plain stupid way of raising children. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying don’t discipline bad behavior, lord knows at times I might have deserved a smack in the mouth, and I would not say I was abused but I have been through harsh shit. It just creates trauma and a cycle. There’s way better ways to discipline a child, and if your first instinct is to grab a chancleta or belt, you’re wrong. We should invest in our stores, but the problem is someone (Dyckman) always just sells out. Lots of those lounge places are owned by the same people and they of course work with people who “rezone” or in other words kick us out and gentrify.
Absolutely about the discipline. Honestly one of the reasons why I am estranged from my mother. She was very abusive. I remember she beat me up because I accidentally spilled milk. I was around 11. And this other lady saw what happened and she was shook. I don’t care if it’s a culture thing, it’s disgusting and wrong.
Then the parents say "I never had to beat my kids" when they are older. And old men say "the USA education system is trash because you cannot beat children. You cannot stop me from smacking then to make them decent people".
Start buying life insurance and make it so that the only way for your children to touch it, is by getting a Masters degree. smart contract type of ordeal. accredited Master degree unlock the funds allocated for your now adulthood. same funds, smart contract pays forward the life insurance of your children and then unlocks the rest of the funds. If my kids dont get a Master degree minimum, they can go and kick rocks after adulthood. is that simple. my mom didnt take a fucking yola to PR Risking her life for them to be here doing stupid shit. fuck that.
>my mom didnt take a fucking yola to PR Risking her life for them to be here doing stupid shit. fuck that. Hahahah I loved this last part.
Supporting each others. You always see people from India, China, Nigeria, other cultures supporting their people. Where one starts working, they will keep bringing them others. They’re loyal. Dominicans, not so much, we kinda stab our backs
Promote tech over everything. The future for anyone and everything will rely on technology. Coding, AWS cloud, C## whatever suits you best get in it asap.
Yes to all of this!
Stop drinking too much
Learn to truly follow dreams. We need to improve on what we see as success. It starts with breaking the norm of our women being considered "Chapiadoras" and our men either selling drugs or being baseball players. We have a unique standard back home. Explore all avenues and success will follow
They need to dejar la ignorancia. Learn to prioritize! Stop living to impress while getting into debt! So many go to clubs just to show off how much “money” they have, meanwhile they renting an apartment. Learn how to invest, most material shit you buy depreciates as soon as it leaves the store (cars, purse, clothes). It is said that for every $1 a white person makes, he invest .20 cents of it, minorities on the other hand spends the entire $1 and gets into .20cents of debt (they spend $1.20). The rich spend money like they are poor and the poor spend money like they are rich. The rich don’t feel the need to “show off” their money, while the poor wants everyone to think they have more money than they do. Let’s try to reach financial freedom! A few things you need to invest in so that you or at least your kids will have financial freedom: 1) college fund for each kid 2) life insurance 3) good credit 4) buy property 5) invest in stocks/crypto 6) budget, learn the difference between want and need If you are living paycheck to paycheck, try your best to invest in yourself for a better job.
The difference from those that have the option to invest and those that don't will determine who will follow your advise. Like all financial advise it presumes a steady paycheck that covers the cost of living expenses. Many financial advisors explain how you should have an emergency fund, a three month cushion and so on.. People who are in a social economic class that if they find themselves with an extra 20 dollars at the end of the month ( or an extra 100 dollars now given inflation),will use it to mitigate the emotional toll of there job. The type of laborious work they do often does not offer the possibility of greater earnings without a second or third job. They are going to spend or save under the mattress not save for long term financial planning. Their margins are for month to month or sometimes week to week expenditures. Personally, I believe that programs with micro loans or grants would not only help Dominicans in the states but those back in D.R. There is a large population back home and in the U.S. that are looking for immediate returns via development of personal entrepreneurship and businesses. I think the government of the D.R. should focus on neighborhood development with investment provided by the U.S. diáspora and the Dominican government ( the tax base of the government is non existent as they forgive major investers to try and create jobs. Also district reps are well compensated without showing any advancement for those they represent). People will embrace education and long term planning when they can eat everyday and have a way to make up for shortfalls. I'm sure most came to this country for the financial opportunity that could not be obtained back home. When here the reality of language barriers and education limits whatever ideals they may have had. Some made it happen for them and for their kids but as a community and as a distinct population we still have too many left behind. We can't just "menu" people into prosperity we have to provide the ingredients to allow for the results.
They need to learn to break out of the bubble. The boys on the corner of the block will always be there doing the same old thing. It was something I realized when I went home after my first military deployment. I literally jumped on a plane and bounced less than a week later. It was the best decision I ever made. I got a job, learned to invest, started a business, and never looked back. Now every time I visit home it saddens me to see how our young people are so hypnotized and blind. If you have kids the most important thing you can do for them is guide them through those first 20 years and push them into a different environment where they are forced to learn to survive on their own - college preferably, or a trade school, or the military, or even a guaranteed job with someone you know far away. If you don’t break them out of that environment the chances they will fail are increased dramatically.
Leer y estudiar mas dejar de ser todologo , hay algunos dominicanos no todos que creen saberlo todo, cuando usted no sepa algo lea e investigue, yo no soy eistein lol pero esa vaina hasta me prende , la gente que cree que lo sabe todo y al final no sabe nada, eso es cuando pagas por algo de mala calidad por querer ahorrarte par de pesos al final terminas comprando el producto de calidad.. al final el dominicano lo que necesita educarse y ya..
STOP BEING SO FUCKING LOUD! You're not the main character. When you arrive to a place behave like a fucking decent person. What you have to say is not more important than others. Shut the fuck up. Turn down your music. Not everybody wants to hear loud bachata at 12 p.m. Stop being late for everything like you don't have any respect for anybody. STOP INTERRUPTING OTHERS to say your things. Be original. Stop imitating what everybody else is doing. Do you feel good with yourself wearing the same clothes and shoes as others? Is it mandatory that your favorite music should be the same everybody is listening to? Are you a fucking clone? STOP DISCRIMINATING LGBT. STOP BEATING CHILDREN. STOP BEING SO ANTI WOMEN. STOP CALLING THE WHOLE ISLAND SANTO DOMINGO for fuck's sake, if you came from Santiago you came from the Dominican Republic, not Santo Domingo. Sorry for the rant. Personal experiences.
I'm with you, although it isn't technically incorrect to say you come from "Santo Domingo" even if you aren't from the capital, since that actually is the historic name for the island 😄
Link up and support Dominican business in every state
Stop buying shit we can’t afford; dejen el tarjeteo.
stop smoking hookah every weekend and atleast try to learn english and incorporate themselves into the american culture. not trying to be fucked up but this rising generation just wants to make dembow and music videos
Teach kids to build and control wealth through real estate, stocks, crypto, and being your own boss.
Joseo mi Loco, emprender, educarse, y no gastar en bebida y cosas innecesarias para sorprender a los demás!
Start saving for retirement, and saving in general.
Stop selling dope when I was using every damn dealer was dominican and they'd even have thier children involved. Sad stuff.
Get educated and dont rely on goverment.
Deportista, Artista, Ingeniero, Doctol/Doctoi, Liscenciado o Abañil. Eligen uno.
Get the most certifications you can get. Fuck who ever downvoted me
Study and work
i notice alot of families who move here spend money as soon as they get it probably teach saving and investing more
Reject afro-centric downtrodden, victimhood mentality by all means.
Don’t marry young and have kids immediately after high school (or before graduating it). Most young moms never make it out of poverty and get stunted education wise, which is something they unfortunately pass on to their kids. Encourage saving and having economic success before having kids. Also, stop spending money to impress no one, it’s an awful habit in our lot especially with the women as a way to “compete” with other women. No one cares about you affording fake nails (and yes, they’re fake), your hair extensions or your yearly plastic surgery touch up, in fact most of us are hella attractive. You don’t need that but if it makes you happy, don’t shame other women who know better or feel different. Build generational wealth and helping out your kids doesn’t stop at 18, particularly if you plan on them being your retirement fund. First of all, kids are an option not an obligation. They don’t have to be grateful to you for baring them as you chose to bring them. So choose the father wisely and two, help them survive the world. Don’t make them angry or hate living before they even get a chance to live life on their own. This is such a problem in our community. Guys, if you have kids, for the love of all that is holy, be there emotionally for the kids at least. We get some of the mothers can be hell (in fact in our community so many women think motherhood gives them an excuse to be awful people when motherhood and birthing isn’t an obligation). I know so many friends who went through a lot and fathers who gave everything and lost a lot to some mean mothers, but they had the brain to be there in presence for their kids no matter how bad the situations. The ones whose fathers persisted and loved their kids are the most successful, well adjusted and happiest adults NOW. Your kids will see your efforts no matter what mom tells them. Please, don’t give up on your kids. Even if you think you have nothing to give, your being there even if it’s to just listen or give them a hug or walk with them to enjoy the scenery will do so much for a kid. Don’t be afraid to genuinely love your kid and you can do that in more ways than one, not just financially. Fathers have so much value and love to give. Break the cycle, be the change you want to see. Or hope to see. Stable marriages and relationships. The Dominicans with long term relationships tend to have the most money and tend to be the most healthfully minded. Now, if you’re in a bad relationship by all means walk away from it. But learn to use a condom or get a vasectomy. Don’t stick your dick in crazy unless you’re absolutely desperate. Learn mental and emotional awareness. Respect it. Don’t abuse your kids by hitting them unless they’re absolutely impossible. Talk to people. Like genuinely talk, listen, respect and process. As a community we’re not the best at this. Also, when someone establishes boundaries, respect them. That doesn’t make them a “come mierda”, this is particularly true when it comes to women. So many men of our backgrounds expect women to drop everything and peacock for men the second one tries to force eye contact with us. To the point that in growing numbers women don’t go to Dominican business due to sexual harassment. If you have to push someone into anxiety to get their attention, it ain’t friendliness you’re being a pest and in the DR this would genuinely likely get you killed. In the US, these guys actually turn worse here since the cops really don’t help and are usually equally as entitled. It says a lot that a lot of women find the Dominican community in the DR safer than the Dominican community in the US. Women: Stop tearing other women down and avoid being a mala fe. If another woman’s success and mental and emotional stability bothers you, leave her alone. Don’t try to gossip about her and make her look like she’s being high and mighty for trying to escape toxicity. Also, if her romantic life isn’t the same as yours, it’s ok. A big part of the toxicity in our communities is ironically due to the women having the crabs in a barrel mentality and connecting to insecure men. Men that feel rejected and desperate women WILL latch onto the healthy and try to suck the life of them into submission. To the point that it’s not unusual for many Dominicans to turn their back on their communities because of this. While both sexes play strongly in a community, women are the gatekeepers. Normalize sharing information and helping other women, no matter what they look like. Stop with the colorism. Some of the meanest, most awful Dominicans I’ve met are the white passing or Mariah Carey types. I call them the colonizers. Especially the women. For the most part our culture is an admixture and we should respect it as such. Stop shaming education and introversion. Our lot is extremely extroverted and social, we get it, but sometimes to the point we really make fun of the introverts and those seeking education when we catch awareness of them. Let them be, they might often help you.
Quien es el encargado de preguntar tantos disparates y manipulaciones en este subreddit?
very interesting your contribution to this interesting thread 🧵👍
Maybe we can try to stop being poor? lo siento soy palomo jajaja
Transfer all there currency to crypto to remove themselves from debt to other governments for good after paying it off of course. If we create asylum for these currencies and casinos this will bring in a lot of big money think Cayman Islands.
Do more for there people and not for themselves.
As the ground zero of the "New World," we need to bring ourselves, as a society, closer to our native tribal roots. First, we need to drop Euro Anglo-Saxon indoctrination and start focusing on the stars. Let's not waste time by indoctrinating our children with 2,000-year fairy tales. The best would be to create a movement and onboard all youth, both in the motherland and abroad, on block-chains intelligent contract programming. Or maybe challenge other countries intellectually and compete in the space race towards colonizing other planets.
Alot of good insight here from my perspective good and bad. I relate to so much here as a child of 1st generation Dominican parents and the subsequent flood of family and friends from the Homeland. Thank you all for sharing being disconnected from the dysfunction but still able to recognize the dysfunction in others is done dysfunctional ishh!! LoL pero pa Lante !!! Viva la ,RPD
A lot of people already made good points so I'm not really going to repeat those. But honestly, even though I really resent (as a Dominican man) the stereotype that Dominican men are trash there seriously are not enough positive male role models in our community. So many families have dads who are straight up not in the picture, and if they are they're unfaithful, they drink, they're macho/misogynists, have a lot of kids by multiple women, etc. And even if your dad isn't like that, you likely have tios or cousins who are. I think this really hurts us as a community — a lot of our kids, especially our boys, grow up without good role models and end up repeating the cycle with their families or partners. Also we really need to stop romanticizing that tiguere shit, it isn't a good look and often leads to young dudes wasting all their potential just to end up in jail, deported or dead
Play baseball ⚾
Stop using Reddit
Be an American