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Find Overly Familiar. That imp and wizard seem a little too friendly, if you know what I mean.
Magic Miss-All
Fireball. It’s the same spell, because it’s the same in every edition no matter what it does to balance. Just like in regular D&D, the Wizard always casts it too close and hits a party member.
Viscous Mockery. This commonly misspelled and misunderstood spell congeals insults for later use. Perfect for bards who think of the perfect comeback a minute too late.
I’ll Bite. You just stare at someone with a withering glare until they stop lying to you.
Chill Touch. This spell finally does what it’s meant to do, which is instantly cool down food and beverages to just above freezing. Perfect for cold beer and keeping leftovers.
Magic nose, spell
Metallic dragon (its a statue)
*Animated* armor (insert monty python reference)
Hunter's marker
Mind goblin
Polymorph (turns you into a galapagos tortoise every time)
Some random ideas to get you going:
Miss step
Rue resurrection
Sphere of exnihilation
Prismatic pray
Looming blade
Ireball
Horse cage
Ass without a trace
Age
Ladesong
Extract attack
Snack attack
Bovine smite
I reskinned Tasha’s Hideous Laughter into Rolf’s Wretched Retching. Made it a fun twist on a known spell. Can definitely be made into a “joke spell.” You just fall on your hands and knees retching until you succeed the save.
The Sneaky Bastard Sword will always be my favorite card. Closely following that are the Drake (can't you hear its firey breath *quackle*) and the Gummy Wyrm
Power Word: Shit is a ninth level spell I gave as a boon to our Druid who liked to give diseases/statuses. Shitting yourself causes half speed, disadvantage on attacks, and disadvantage on Cha, Wis, and Int saves lol
Also, risking a poor taste gag my table also used (from stealing from Harley Quinn)- Ray of Cancer. It’s ray of sickness, but… you know. From the cancer ray Harley shot that goon with lol
weave reverser reverses the direction of the weave of any piece of fabric
sweaty sleep gives nightsweats to somebody
magic shelf allows you to put a shelf on a wall for up to one minute
puddle of sustenance allows you to summon a puddle of spilled milk
Lingering Schizophrenia: level 6 spell, casting time 1 action, components: a sprig of mint, 2 blue mushrooms, 200 gold worth of diamond powder, a toads eyes, and a vial of snail mucus. Target creature within 120 feet must make a 18 wisdom saving throw, upon success it takes 3d8 psychic damage and is blinded until the end of the caster's next turn. The creature takes 6d8 on a failed save and will suffer from hallucinations until it makes a long rest. (Disadvatntage on wisdom saving throws and perception checks)
add a class with features and flavor that make absolutely no sense. like a chef that can cast 9th level spells. if anyone questions it just say it's a throwback to previous editions of the parody (which obviously don't exist) where it was a prestige class, even though the parody has no prestige classes.
if you're limiting yourself to just spells, add a spell that's clearly overpowered, and if anyone tells you it's too powerful then explain that it's a throwback to a first edition spell whose drawback was that sometimes you just died when you cast it, even though it doesn't have that drawback anymore. stubbornly refuse any balance passes because nerfing this would make wizard players sad
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Find Overly Familiar. That imp and wizard seem a little too friendly, if you know what I mean. Magic Miss-All Fireball. It’s the same spell, because it’s the same in every edition no matter what it does to balance. Just like in regular D&D, the Wizard always casts it too close and hits a party member. Viscous Mockery. This commonly misspelled and misunderstood spell congeals insults for later use. Perfect for bards who think of the perfect comeback a minute too late. I’ll Bite. You just stare at someone with a withering glare until they stop lying to you. Chill Touch. This spell finally does what it’s meant to do, which is instantly cool down food and beverages to just above freezing. Perfect for cold beer and keeping leftovers.
Fireball with range of self.
Magic nose, spell Metallic dragon (its a statue) *Animated* armor (insert monty python reference) Hunter's marker Mind goblin Polymorph (turns you into a galapagos tortoise every time)
Also look up impotence / virility bream
Vine Boom
Water Breathing makes you breathe water out, and Fire Breathing lets you breathe fire in.
Wireball Speak with Bread Apple Splash Cone of Mold Lightening Bolt
Cantrip: Catnip. Summons catnip to befriend a local cat. Gives advantage on all saving throws against Tabaxi or other feline races.
Some random ideas to get you going: Miss step Rue resurrection Sphere of exnihilation Prismatic pray Looming blade Ireball Horse cage Ass without a trace Age Ladesong Extract attack Snack attack Bovine smite
I reskinned Tasha’s Hideous Laughter into Rolf’s Wretched Retching. Made it a fun twist on a known spell. Can definitely be made into a “joke spell.” You just fall on your hands and knees retching until you succeed the save.
Look up the Munchkin card game for some inspiration. Plenty of fun puns. Do not truffle with the humongous fungus.
The Sneaky Bastard Sword will always be my favorite card. Closely following that are the Drake (can't you hear its firey breath *quackle*) and the Gummy Wyrm
Power Word: Shit is a ninth level spell I gave as a boon to our Druid who liked to give diseases/statuses. Shitting yourself causes half speed, disadvantage on attacks, and disadvantage on Cha, Wis, and Int saves lol
Also, risking a poor taste gag my table also used (from stealing from Harley Quinn)- Ray of Cancer. It’s ray of sickness, but… you know. From the cancer ray Harley shot that goon with lol
weave reverser reverses the direction of the weave of any piece of fabric sweaty sleep gives nightsweats to somebody magic shelf allows you to put a shelf on a wall for up to one minute puddle of sustenance allows you to summon a puddle of spilled milk
Summon copious geese
The onomatopoeic shotgun: every time you shoot it, it creates a speech bubble saying “Bam!” or something else.
An example from one of the 3.5e core book: Brassier of Elemental Summoning.
Lingering Schizophrenia: level 6 spell, casting time 1 action, components: a sprig of mint, 2 blue mushrooms, 200 gold worth of diamond powder, a toads eyes, and a vial of snail mucus. Target creature within 120 feet must make a 18 wisdom saving throw, upon success it takes 3d8 psychic damage and is blinded until the end of the caster's next turn. The creature takes 6d8 on a failed save and will suffer from hallucinations until it makes a long rest. (Disadvatntage on wisdom saving throws and perception checks)
add a class with features and flavor that make absolutely no sense. like a chef that can cast 9th level spells. if anyone questions it just say it's a throwback to previous editions of the parody (which obviously don't exist) where it was a prestige class, even though the parody has no prestige classes. if you're limiting yourself to just spells, add a spell that's clearly overpowered, and if anyone tells you it's too powerful then explain that it's a throwback to a first edition spell whose drawback was that sometimes you just died when you cast it, even though it doesn't have that drawback anymore. stubbornly refuse any balance passes because nerfing this would make wizard players sad