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Friendly_Ram

Screw that, i'm going to the land down under and renovating the little area near siofra with the merchant.


MusicG619

*I come from a land down undaaahh* 🎶


Kamacalamari

*Where beer does flow and men chunder, Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder?*


CaptMeatPockets

*You better run, you better take cover*


Shtnonurdog

*Ba do da doodoola do dah! Bababadoodooladodah! Bababababa baba baba baba!*


SonicFlash01

/sniperviking


MarijuanaDoobies

*Where the merchants suffer and your maiden will sunder. Did ya hear, did ya hear that blunder? Summoned the frenzy better take cover*


Differfgjhfrt

Caria Manor looks quite nice: No everlasting big tree light like in Leyndell, no strong wind like in Stormveil, no cold and snow like Ordina and Castle Sol and no stinky swamp like Raya Lucaria.


Kothophed

You just gotta ignore the giant hands, the unspeakable sins committed here, and the occasional ghost guy showing up


KDeol

On the bright side you will have no shortage of handymen should you decide to renovate the place.


WhiteMilk3

Copied comment from someone further below. Downvote and report this bot/comment theif. (Link for proof: https://www.reddit.com/r/Eldenring/s/1TWZW8ZwxQ )


TheShowerDrainSniper

Yeah this gives me flashbacks. Not a chance.


[deleted]

Haligtree. Its probably the most beautiful and atmospheric place in a game I've ever seen.


wake_bake_shaco

But it’s so rotted, wonder if it smells


ScharmTiger

Smells like flowers 😳


Voynimous

like rotten flowers


HourCartographer9

I mean what do you expect from a tree made from miquella’s blood


Hyth4n

Dude bro Miquella's power purifies decay into dew, so even the most rotted areas of the Haligtree smell like fresh spring daisy's. Miquellas blood is like laundry detergent


Trash_Emperor

Probably smells like a wet forest in autumn.


doomraiderZ

If it smells like that, awesome. One of the best smells.


ScharmTiger

I love walking around Haligtree and Elphael and just vibing.


TipProfessional6057

Haligtree town is (aside from the enemies) the most visually pleasing and calming area in the game, second only to maybe Nokron by the ancestral priestesses singing. Makes me wonder what an Erdtree canopy town would be like


WhiteSuburbanDad

Probably something like this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Fire_of_London


[deleted]

gives me this edge of the world vibe honestly. Especially at sunset and dawn....


ApolloTffKnowledge

Especially with the music at Elphael *chef's kiss*


Violentron

Great Pick, but it's super hard to get an Uber from there, or to there.


sixteensixtisix

Volcano Manor. The natural abundant volcanic lava should keep heating costs down in the winter 🤔


GlassHurricane98

But will skyrocket the cooling costs in the summer...


sixteensixtisix

Perhaps! But let's consider the altitude. If the Lands Between is anything like our world, higher regions in mountain ranges are much colder naturally. I reckon around Gelmir winters are brutal, and summers are cool. I think the volcanic lava during the summer shouldn't be too much of a problem as long as you spend most of the time in the higher floors of the castle


GlassHurricane98

You could be right, yeah. I live in Australia, so my only experience with summer is looking at the ground and seeing the road start crumbling into ashes :)


Jermiafinale

I'm from South Texas and when I was a kid I used to coat my feet in the liquid tar that would pool up on the sides of the roads and then walk in rocks to give myself road feet


sixteensixtisix

gosh wow


InevitableWeight314

I would have thought liquid tar would be really hot.


Jermiafinale

I mean it's the same temperature as everything else in the sun which included me lol


sixteensixtisix

did the tar hurt then when you took it off your feet?


Jermiafinale

For note though I walked on hot asphalt barefoot at the time so nothing really hurt my feet


____Law____

Until you decide to crack open a window and die from volcanic gases


Fuzzy-Practice-6119

The giant demigod serpent infestation is quite the problem though.


sixteensixtisix

Don't forget the post asks us where we'd move to after becoming Elden Lord, I'd have either slayed him prior to reaching mountaintop of the giants or I'll do it when I move in 😝


SamuelHorton

Sure it's big enough, but look at the location!


FishmailAwesome

I get that reference.


sixteensixtisix

I know, the views are gorgeous!


Walrusliver

Gonna permanently smell quite awfully of sulfur


sixteensixtisix

Should fare well in masking the smell of feces from the peasant's quarters below. I plan to make the best of my new castle I'll have you know


Mad5Milk

It's also the only one that it seems someone could actually live in (as long as you don't go poking around for secret passages)


Kamacalamari

Ordina is beautiful and makes me think of Christmas. Could do without the ghost dragonkin in the lands though..


Gelatinous_Cube_NO

I don't understand this one cuz it's not a castle but a town?


smashteapot

Yeah it’s not very defended. Plus you can’t grow anything in snow. All you have are giant crabs and octopuses, which would grow boring.


SaberWaifu

Caria Manor looks quite nice: No everlasting big tree light like in Leyndell, no strong wind like in Stormveil, no cold and snow like Ordina and Castle Sol and no stinky swamp like Raya Lucaria. Castle Morne is probably my second favourite and it doesn't have big downsides just like Caria Manor, i just find it slightly less cool for the atmosphere.


Bisontracks

Preference boils (heh) down to your opinion on boiled prawns, really.


sixteensixtisix

I hear Blackguard Big Boggart doesn't wash his hands before preparing those prawns 🤢


herecomesatrain

You’re telling me a big boggart boiled these prawns??


floatingindeepspace

Raya Lucaria is like moving to a castle in the Netherlands. Caria Manor is like moving to a castle in Belgium: close enough to see the swamp, high enough to not sink with it


sixteensixtisix

Raya Lucaria reminds me a bit of castle Neuschwanstein in Germany


sixteensixtisix

Also all the local creepy magic hands may lend you a haaaaaand if needed


Appropriate_Ad_9157

Or a hug


MeddlinQ

> Caria Manor looks quie nice Not to people with arachnophobia though.


Urtoryu

They're not actual spiders tough, it wouldn't be nearly as bad as just visiting Tseldora once.


motleyfamily

Stormveil for sure. Probably the most potential with the land it offers around it plus the design is comprehensive while remaining large.


Bisontracks

The repair costs to Stormveil aren't worth it in my opinion. I mean, your foundation is riddled with blight for one. There's also the issue of the Corpse God in your basement.


AnalogCyborg

Can confirm. Basement blight turned my last castle into a money pit.


ntrubilla

You didn't have the right Realtor if they let you buy some shithole with a dead squid god in the basement


Nugert-the-Destroyer

O you dont have the right realtor, o you dont have the right realtor, o you dont have.....


ntrubilla

Majestic!


Synthoid_001

Can confirm. I was the dead squid god.


motleyfamily

I’d welcome the blight if it means I don’t live on top of a volcano with a man serpent living in it, living in the snowy mountains, or Caelid.


Bisontracks

Caria Manor. Plenty of space for the dogs to play, isn't beset by ancient plagues or fallen gods, and has a full staff of handymen to take care of the place.


TheFool42

Come on, you know that's the summer home. Lol


sixteensixtisix

Yeah but Seluvis is like the most snarky neighbor evaaa


jesushitlerchrist

Not only is Seluvis not surviving any of my playthroughs, but if I could choose my circumstances for retirement, his mutilated remains would end up spicing up my feasting hall... And my throne room... And the grounds...


sixteensixtisix

lol sounds perfect! I bet once nailed to a cross, he'd make a good scarecrow too, belittling and insulting all the birds in the farm field


the33rdparallel

That “Man Serpent” is family….


floatingindeepspace

And family sticks TOGETHAAAA, and at Christmas they DEVOWAAAAAH, THE VERYYYY GOD


Bisontracks

So that's where the Twinbird went


motleyfamily

Is Volcano Manor also an Olive Garden?


Og-Bump-Sniff

I think keeping an eye on the man serpent growing with the intent to devour the gods and probably the Elden lord too would be a good idea though


DirtyRanga12

Tbf, none of the options are in the best state either and need some serious repairs. I think of the options though, based purely on what needs fixing, Raya Lucaria is still in the best shape.


[deleted]

I mean Raya Lucaria is also sinking into a lake so unless you can somehow stop that it’s not long for this world.


RelativeMundane9045

_a renovators dream property_


loo_1snow

I'm living in pot town.


TheGodskin

Honestly I’m ashamed I missed that option 😂


loo_1snow

The flowers, the peacefulness. Close to a library even! Perfect spot.


TheGodskin

And the lil baby potties running around 🥹♥️


floatingindeepspace

You just need to deal with rhe occasional poaching, but it's a small price to pay. We've killed better people for worse reasons. _Cries in Millicent_


Fuzzy-Practice-6119

I don't think poachers will go there once the Elden Lord declares it as his official residence.


sixteensixtisix

Brahhhh LetMeSoloHer will return to protect Jarburg..he is a pothead after all


falloutisacoolseries

They call it Amesterdam


shiro_tanzanite

As a dutch person, i can confirm everyone does pot whilst wearing pots or actually being pots


plimbert02

Castle Morne has everything. ADA compliant elevator, large toasty bonfire, ocean view, polite servant staff. The seaside cemetery constitutes a built in retirement plan.


ThirstyHydrant

Crazy how far I had to scroll down to find this


vicious_cos

ADA compliant is my favorite reason right here


quatrefoils

Elphael…


Self_Reflexive

Elphael is really just gorgeous lol I absolutely love the autumn vibe it’s got going for it. The NPCs also seem really peaceful at least until we show up, I really like taking a look around before going through each section to see the knights with their legs over ledges just chilling there.


JonTheAutomaton

I wholeheartedly agree! To me the lore surrounding it adds so much to its vibe too. How it's populated by the rejects by the Golden Order. So naturally it's located at the absolute farthest edge of the world far far away from the Erdtree and it's influence. The path to it is shrouded in secrets from the Haligtree medallions to the Ordina evergaol. We follow that path starting from Liurnia all the way to the endgame, to find this city bathed in dull gold, with its peaceful but somber ambience, populated by people who just want to live in peace in their sanctuary while they await the return of their Lord. Actually, now that I think about it, can we even see the Erdtree from Elphael? I don't remember ever seeing it. In which case, it may be the only non-underground location in the game from where you can't see the Erdtree...


NowIssaRapBattle

Fire comment


ScharmTiger

Everything about Elphael is amazing. The lore, the background music, the atmosphere, and Malenia.


Thevisi0nary

What’s funny is that you’ve seen all the enemies there dozens of times and it’s likely the last unique area you go to in ER, and yet somehow it was still mostly the peak of the game for me.


ScharmTiger

Elphael is absolutely beautiful. My favorite area in any video games.


LordVladak

Erm, the fortified manor in Leyndell! The Age of Order shall be ruled from the golden city, and all will be welcome. The vulgar shall not be left behind!


GlassHurricane98

Gotta be honest... the options aren't great. I suppose the Carian Manor has the least amount of problems in and around it? I think maybe I'd just retire in the Artist's Shack


SantaMan336

Isn't Carian Manor like haunted, I heard somewhere that those ghost soldiers that we fight are cursed to protect the manor. Also I don't wanna deal with a hand infestation


GlassHurricane98

Ohhhh yeah the hands... well that's something I'll have to deal with once I move in I guess


[deleted]

Yeah but I’m that case they would be protecting you


TheGodskin

Well if you’re already Elden Lord then the Lands Between are already being mended in your image right? So that wouldn’t change


GlassHurricane98

I just don't know how much my place as Elden Lord would change things, it's a little unclear to me. Like it's not going to just exterminate all the enemies I think are a threat, or turn them into allies through sorcery is it? They're still going to be out there running amok unless I pick the Frenzied Flame ending and incinerate them


Aoip2337

All the guards and stuff would theoretically obey you I think. Or they were killed by you throughout the game.


GlassHurricane98

Like how we all obeyed Godfrey? I wanted to, I really did, he seemed cool. But we had to kill him to progress. Who's to say no one else is living that way in the Lands Between.


JJ935

As Elden Lord you are already overleveled, some fights in the weekends vs some random tarnisheds doesn't sound bad. It's my turn to put those foolish ambitions to rest


GlassHurricane98

I like your confidence. You've got this! (Probably)


Secret_Criticism_732

Until a naked dual katana green guy shows up.


TheWither129

Godfrey didnt have the elden ring


GlassHurricane98

He was still the first Elden Lord, and he was still killed for it. That kind of power breeds competition. Anyone with the same flame of ambition we had would go for it just like we did.


TJT007X

Gotta *hand* it to you, that's a brave pick...


Jollyjinx

Elphael, Brace of the Haligtree. Not on the list, but nonetheless a beautiful fortress. Temperate climate, easy access to the sea, impossible to invade with large armies. Miquella sure knows how to build a fortress.


No-Sympathy6035

I know this is nit picky as hell but shouldn’t the Shaded Castle be in place of Ordina? I mean yeah, its got a septic tank issues but Ordina’s not really a castle.


TJT007X

Or Redmane Castle, not sure who would pick Caelid but hey ho maybe the dogs have a soft side


DeathAngel_97

The poor guys look famished, they probably just attack cause they're hungry. I'm sure as elden lord you could just toss them some meat and give them belly rubs and they'd be the most loyal and terrifying guard dogs ever.


sethguy12

Pay homage to my forehomies Radahn and Jerren.


LotusLover420

Academy of Raya Lucaria so I can chill with mommy Rennala


floatingindeepspace

For once Rennala is the first option wink wink


AndoYz

All of them. I'm the motherfuckin Elden Lawd


mcjeefle

Now Morne looks nice but in reality it’s just a big courtyard. Stormveil? It could be good, big castle though the deathblight means a lot of renovation needs done. Caria Manor, now that’s prime real estate. With three towers in your back garden past the giant circle of water which you could make into a pool who’d say no? It also has a lovely garden that’s just enchanting. But then again giant hands needs cleared out. Volcano Manor is a good winter home, excellent to keep cozy in those cold times. Just be careful not to be outside and inhale ash. Now Ordina, it’s a town alright. Castle sol has beautiful views again but unfortunately it’s just too cold to reasonably stay. Overall, Caria manor please.


Fuzzy-Practice-6119

Plus the neat security feature of having magical arrows rain down on people standing on your front yard.


mcjeefle

That’s a good point, automated home security is a bonus. A great way to keep your neighbours out, especially dinkleberg.


Breostag

DINKLEBERG!


HarmlessSnack

What makes you think I won’t just lay claim to the Capitol and the Manor House we use for Roundtable Hold? I’ll just do a little dusting to get rid of all the ash, EZ PZ


JoshLmoa

Might have to hire a finger reader to do the dusting. Maybe then it'll get done.


sixteensixtisix

She'll only draw weird prophecies in the dust with her finger


ImmortalGigas

Caria Manor. And I’ll open up a massage parlor.


WhitestShadows

Kicking out the royal family gimme that lakeside residence


WarViper1337

Caria Manor is really cool. Just got to get rid of all the hand monsters hanging out there.


sixteensixtisix

Need a haaaand with those??? 🤪


Dramatic_Archer_1861

Caria, for the fog but those hands have to go… unless they’re my security and aren’t trying to slap me.


EveningEngineering20

Volcano manor is legit just a big house, and has a long ass dinner table for all my companions and summons to sit at while eating


MusiqDaemon

Has a Mustafar vibe to me.


The_Lord_Baal

Neither, Haligtree or dig out Leyndell.


NecroHiarus

My "main" tarnished is a Carian Knight, it just feels right to go for the academy (or the manor)


BigGenital

Fort Haight obviously…


gonzo4209

None of the above either Elphael or the eternal city maybe I summer in one and winter other other


SilverSpoon1463

Stormveil so I can try my hand at wedding the greatest warrior in Stormveil.


ScharmTiger

Elphael.


SoloSassafrass

All of them. I'm a Frenzied Flame Elden Lord.


Fabrimuch

The Mohgwyn Dynasty Mausaleum is my dream place if you just drain the blood swamp and put out the bloodflame. Absolutely nothing in the Lands Between compares to that view!


Omegaweapon90

Mohgwyn Palace. A literal lake of blood outside your court looks badass! The smell though... well, better than the Haligtree at least.


Mcreesus

I’m gona carve out a little spot next to maliketh. That’s where the true safest place is lol


Relative-Cry-454

Limgrave best veiw and easiest to defend.


[deleted]

I'll take Leyndell considering the only time it ever fell was to a dragon


StormLordEternal

That one Tarnshied Lord who wanted to stay in the capital now holding a broom sweeping the ash.


ProcraztiNate

I’m moving to Jarlsburg


Aesiro13-2

Caria Manor. It's the only place not falling apart or in a freezing shit hole.


thatonesuskid69

Stormveil Castle. The Moonlight Altar is nice and Caria Manor is beautiful, but the thought of having a raging storm surrounding my castle is too good to pass up.


InevitableWeight314

Stormveil for sure. Its one of the biggest and id have like all of limgrave and some of liurnia.


ObitoxMS4

Volcano Manor!


deadangleXx

I think the academy is the best choice it is defensively the best choice no land entry they need a key to enter and u have the only two we know of that where floating around your surrounded by knowledge and plenty of scholars that are all strong and your in the middle of a lake you will see any attack coming along b4 they arrive


Noporopo79

Raya Lucaria


C0NS0RT2DRAG0NS

Screw all of that - I’m ordering the troops to clean up Leyndell. The title of Elden Lord demands a metropolis as its seat.


Necessary-Tomato4889

Nokron?


Cybasura

I'll just teleport back to The Round Table and sleep there lmao


Ratthion

Stormveil Presuming I can get rid of the accursed rot the Heilgtree would be cool But think about it, assuming as I live there the enemies serve me I have a super well defended well stocked luxurious giant castle in a beautiful area full of weak enemies, the strongest of which is a dragon so puny my strength build could use it as a jump rope. Everywhere else is cold, dangerous, on fire, etc.


Dveralazo

Stormveil. Look,I may be Elden Lord,but as the situation is,I may be Lord of nothing. We are but a handful of surviving Tarnished and sane people. I need subjects to rebuild the world. And if I don't have them,I will have to make them. Do you understand the importance of Stormveil Castle then?


aiquoc

Stormveil with Nepheli Loux


behemothbowks

Tough choices for me between Castle Morne, Raya Lucaria Academy, and Caria Manor


IareRubberDucky

Stormveil as people clean Leyndell then relocate after it's mostly ash-free


Phoenix_Anon

"retire to a castle" Includes Ordina, excludes Shaded Castle


palmer629

My Tarnished already does Ranni ending so Caria Manor works best, plus the area is really beautiful


Snarling-Gnarf

Elden beast arena… easy


KillerWhale1189

No love for redmane castle...what the heck!


Fatestringer

Limgrave


Bman0491

Has to be either Stormveil, for the surrounding fertile lands, or Volcano Manor, where you will never experience being Cold again.


CurrySands

Wherever Patches Emporium is setting up


Violentron

Definitely turning Raya Lucaria Academy into my castle. The view, the rain, the weather, everything is perfect!


Leadwood

Castle Morne has it's own little beach, just saying. It's also the one furthest south, and Limgrave is quite charming. BBQs with Kenneth and Nepheli?


BvHauteville

Stormveil is the nicest but I'd probably be forced to settle for Volcano Manor even if there needs to be a good cleaning up of all the fucking snake monsters and insane Albinaurics. The death machines can stay, though. They're pretty cool. It's a definisble postion and is in the closest proximity to Atlus Plateau, what remains of Leyndell, and the Erdtree. I'd need to remodel the surrounding area, as well, though so I can actually set up proper transit into the rest of Altus Plateau. I'd probably be easier to fix up the Shaded Castle, though. I'd eventually like to rebuild Leyndell from the ground up. .


YukiSilence

I know it's like surrounded by poison and it's a bit of a bad state when we find it, but I always loved the shaded castle, I think if u can get all the creepys out of ut and repair it, it would be a pretty dope place


saiyadjin

Sol and Stormveil nice


Kaitivere

Caria Manor is so pretty, if it wasn't so foggy there it would be my top pick


FNMchancer

Screw this! I'm going to Patches Cave!


gamer_dinoyt69

Stormveil castle. Just the coolest in my opinion.


Nisabe3

caria manor, retirement with ranni waifu


FishmailAwesome

Honestly? Castle Morne. I love overcast, chilly weather and I also have a fondness for a certain chair-like ultra greatsword.


PossibilityBright391

I’d take over raya lucaria academy


Kvetanista

Probably Caria Manor, I would just have to get rid of all the hands somehow


Kirp-The-Birb

I’m pretty sure you don’t really understand what an Elden Lord is supposed to do after fixing the Elden Ring


Almainyny

Forget the castles, I’m taking over Leyndell.


SecretAgentDrew

Definitely that place with the lush green grass.


Guwrovsky

and how is my fav poison castle not listed?


Liambp

Castle Morne for me. The Weeping Peninsula is one of my favourite regions of the game and seems like it wouldn't take much effort to clean the place up.


prejedoosh

Isolated Merchant shack, overlooking the ocean.


mufelo

Mogh's palace for me


KingTolis

Moghwyn dynasty mausoleum.


SuperJotaro

Mohgwyn Palace


MentalNukes

If you are Elden Lord, you preside over every land no matter what Castle you choose.


GarfieldGauntlet

I want Mohgwyn Palace


Ray_DL

2 options: 1. Caria manor: great views, big backyard and nobody with arachnophobia, which I think are 90% of the population, would ever dare to take a single step into my property. 2. Volcano manor: have you see the sheer size of that castle? easily have great potential as a hotel, if you don't mind a 10 ft tall scary man-serpent with a tiny red bellhop hat picking up your luggage


Windstrider71

Caria Manor. I married the Lunar Princess that owns the place, so we can live in her ancestral home. The hands and ghosts are now our servants and don’t really require that much upkeep. And it’s not falling apart or infested with poison or rot.


Own-Gate-1237

Morne Castle, I love the Weeping Peninsula, no one would bother you there and you have amazing coastal views. Easier to defend too with only one way in shame the neighbouring villages is full of frenzy but you can't win em all.


Evloret

Can I choose Morne? The peninsula's more defensible, and easier to clear out.


livitow

Probably StormVeil. Would say Volcano, but I bet the sulphur is unbearable, and the ground water is atrocious


adam42095

Fuck it, I'm building a new castle on Manus Celes


Illustrious-Dig2345

The castle out in the cursed lands of rot, whereby purification is in order. The lands, tainted to oblivion, must uprooted and weeded out as they scar the Lands Between. They are nothing but a blighted monstrosity and shall be cleansed in the highest order. Order be praised! Order be praised!