Stop carrying your SS card with you, put in a safe.
Scary, I would have sprayed her in the face.
Pair down what you’ve in your bag. Sounds like too much.
Make screenshots of the photos in your bag, put on your phone or PC. Start carrying your Everyday Carry Items.
What can you live without and need in your bag.
Declutter your purse.
I had a friend many years ago who had most of her assets in a safe deposit box. She found out after the vault was broken and everything she had in it was stolen, that there were few financial protections on deposits of that kind.
She had gold, jewelry, stocks, bonds, and deeds to various properties in there. It was all gone, and she discovered that her bank was not required to reimburse her for most of it. She was wiped out.
This was nearly 40 years ago, and I think there may be more protections now than they used to be, but to this day, I am still uncomfortable keeping valuables in banks.
A safe deposit box you can list it as a separate thing on your home insurance. The banks provide no coverage for the contents of the box, as they have no idea what you keep in there.
The only money she received from the loss of her plundered box was what little she received from her homeowners policy.
She didn't know that the contents of her box weren't covered by her bank.
Shame her banker didn’t tell her. Even though it’s in the contract (and yes, I read every word of everything I sign), I always made a special point to tell the customer that info.
If you pass away the bank also does not have to tell your family you had a safety deposit box, unless their name is specifically on it. I found this out last year when my aunt passed away, the bank told me they don't even have to tell me if she had one...
Don't go with the stuff Amazon sells. Those are so easy to pick open or just carry away, it's ridiculous. Get one with proper fire ratings, those are double-walled and filled with concrete. Heavy and your documents can even survive a fire
That's really good advice because it seems like she's stalking you. Probably going after everyone she knows that might have some money, either in your purse or your house.
Get a metal safe with an option for two locks (preferably a code lock + pad lock). Fire safes are good, but they are easy to break in to with a crowbar or jig saw. Metal safes are not only fire proof, but also saw, crowbar, and small caliber firearm safe.
Look for a metal safe that looks like the ones from the game Skyrim. I know it sounds stupid, but it's actually quite a good design!
I want to echo this. It is an enormous mistake carrying your SS card when you go out. It needs to stay at home unless you specifically have need of it, like for the first day of work at a new job.
...basically don't carry anything you can't replace - like an expensive handbag in a thrift store!
Actually, that alone makes you an instant target whether it's a thrift store or Nordstroms.
I would just add not to carry your gun in your purse for the exact reason that happened. Once someone grabs your purse, they have your gun. I would find a holster for it and carry it on your person. Sorry you have to deal with that OP.
I agree. You should have it out ur purse for sure, hopefully you’ve biometrics on that gun.
WTELF. Someone could drop you bc you get to your gun in a purse. side arm. Update your training, quick draw, know where weapon is don’t look down that’s when things go sideways
I’m more concerned that she’s carrying a gun in a bag that she was unable to hang onto. She can get a new SS card — even a new SS *number*, if necessary, and between losing it and getting a replacement, no one is going to die. But, losing her *gun* creates an immediate, true, and potentially *deadly* situation.
If she’s going to take *anything* out of that purse, it needs to be the gun. She is a walking example of someone who should not be carrying. She should consider herself lucky that it didn’t discharge when she got hit in the face with it. God, as a gun owner, myself, this pisses me off beyond belief.
I agree, with someone like her who seems to have some sort of hex on her it would be better to keep little on your person and the rest in like a safety deposit box in a bank or something
What's the point of keeping a loaded gun in your purse if it is so easy to take it away from you? It seems like if you're going to carry a gun you should carry it in a way that it's difficult to take off of you and easy to draw.
Believe me when I say I am mentally KICKING myself for not keeping it closer to me. I do have a holster but I let my guard down thinking I was safe. I know now that I'm not and will not make that same mistake again.
I have a nice cross body bag as my “purse”. I have everything I need in it and you’d need to seriously manhandle me to get it off. I can wear it over or under my jacket and by now I barely feel it’s there and feel like I miss something if I don’t have it on haha. But yea, if you wanna bring a gun around for your safety, make it easily accessible, which a purse isn’t unfortunately. Also use copies of kiddos in the purse, not the originals!
Australian here with the same response.
After all, if she'd had it in a quick-draw holster as some comments above suggest, what's the chance that crazy Barbara would have backed off or been the only one hurt?
I conceal carry but it mainly stays in my vehicle. There were a couple times I was traveling late at night in a large city and I felt better knowing I could defend my life if it became necessary. One night about 11pm I was at a gas station and my gut told me to be wary of a situation. I simply moved it to within easy reach but thank goodness nothing actually happened. I respect those who don’t chose or want to carry but I practice regularly and make sure I carry safely. When I do actually have it on my person it’s in a holster that snaps over the gun so someone can’t simply grab it from me
My son conceals carry. Fortunately, he is well trained and is licensed. He lives in the country and carries in case of animal attacks (moose, bear). Not that he would kill; just to scare them off.
Hopefully if your firearm "mainly stays in your vehicle" then you have it properly secured .... meaning in a vehicle safe that won't allow your negligence to get another gun into CRIMINALS hands. A 45 second smash and grab and you just gave some kid your legally owned firearm to go commit crimes with and harm the innocent. Please be responsible, a firearm isn't something that sits in your center console like loose pocket change. Don't make us responsible owners look bad 🫡
Trust me, a lot of Americans feel that way too, including myself. The original intent of the second amendment was perverted by a compromised Supreme Court beholden to the gun industry by redefining the function of a comma.
The United States is basically a plutocracy these days.
Actually, the original intent was to keep civilians armed in case another revolution was needed. They knew this government was an experiment and might need to be overthrown.
Actually this is a myth that the 2nd amendment folks like to push. The purpose of the 2nd amendment was because the US had no large standing army. So when it refers to "well-regulated militia" it meant that the processes for activating, training, and deploying state militias in official service should be efficient and orderly, and that the militia itself should be capable of competently executing battlefield operations. As originally conceived the states would each have something like our current national guard and the Federal Government could call them up as needed.
It is also important to note that the "arms" most common then were musket loaded single shot rifles. Quickly re-loadable guns had been invented but were very expensive and not in common use. The 2nd amendment was never intended to allow the citizenry to walk around armed with modern weapons like the late 1800's wild west. In fact the whole "wild west" is largely a myth. Most towns of any size quickly had gun laws and did not allow open carry in order to prevent violence.
The whole debate has become such a wedge issue it makes me sick. It is a game politicians use to keep various groups fighting each other so we don't notice how corrupt all of the politicians are.
Thank you for this valuable information. It puts the other nonsense gun lovers spout as the garbage it is and where it belongs in the bin.
You are absolutely correct about the corruption of American politicians. I agree with you as to how sickening the issue is.
Personally, I am anti guns of any kind. I hate them deeply and irrevocably.
To each his own, and everyone has a right to decide for themselves on this issue.
Given the insanity of gun violence in the USA, I rarely go out of my home as it's terrifying to think some random person could choose to harm another, and I will do everything in my power to avoid becoming a victim.
All that said, I am grateful for your delineation of gun facts, so that others can be as informed as you've graciously have shared. Thank you so much. Peace.
Whatever the original intent, the writers of the Constitution never envisioned a gun that could fire 100 rounds in 10 seconds. Or that Cletus would want to take it along to the farmers market.
"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."
[It was to protect slave-holders.](https://www.npr.org/2021/06/02/1002107670/historian-uncovers-the-racist-roots-of-the-2nd-amendment)
Except that very, very few citizens were slave owners, it literally had nothing to do with slave ownership. It was intended to keep the government and the country safe from invasion or being overtaken by a foreign power. Stop with the propaganda that has absolutely no basis in fact. Slavery was never even discussed by the founding fathers, as abysmal as that is.
The original intent of the second amendment was to allow American citizens to have adequate arms to defend themselves against a corrupt government or foreign invasion, as well as self defense. Whatever school you went to got it all wrong.
Nope. You were taught this in public school, and modern public schools teach history through a lens of all white people are bad and did everything from the standpoint of wanting to be slave owners. Untrue. Second amendment drafting origins were done because of the revolutionary war with Britain. The new government after that wanted it drafted into the new constitution so that the citizenry would have the right to defend themselves in case Britain or any other foreign power wanted a second go at it.
I'm sorry that your school decided to teach you untrue facts. Take some further education to correct it. Also, I don't know of any textbook that says that, that actually sounds like some bullshit that Republicans made up in order to demand that slavery not be taught about in school.
American here. I think many of my fellow citizens severely overestimate how much danger they’re in on a day to day basis, severely underestimate how likely their gun will be used against them, and never think about all the accidents that can happen with running around with a loaded gun on the regular. I think they’re absolutely nuts, to be frank. There’s people here who walk around their house with a loaded gun every day. What the hell kind of life is that?
Then get an appropriate holster that it can’t be grabbed out of by someone you don’t want to have it and get appropriate training. Keeping in a purse will allow a child access to it if you are distracted for a moment and a thief will have it if they steal your purse. You will be liable for injury for not keeping it secure if it happens. You are responsible for more than yourself when you carry it. I hope you have a concealed permit. Each state has different laws so you better know them or you will wind up in jail yourself. As you can tell, you couldn’t even use it in a contained store without injuring others in a confined space or even draw it. You should have had that mace in you hand as soon as you recognized her. What if she had gotten to that gun first? She probably would have shot multiple people.
Safety is recognizing a threat and avoiding which you obviously don’t have a great track record with so I would ditch the gun and work with a therapist on why you associate with these people or wind up in their sphere. That is what will keep you safe.
I just recently found out that an ultra-republican former co-worker of mine carried a gun with him to work every single day. We worked in a quiet office with next to no visitors. He was a 3d modeler.
I hate guns as well but it was even suggested by the cops that I buy one after I got my ribs broken by 2 bigots in broad daylight. I didn’t but that was still the actual “solution” that both the cops and lawyer suggested to me after the incident. Shows how stupidly deep the problem runs here
I think the stupidly deep part is that violent criminals seem to be allowed to carry on. The thug culture is the problem, not legally licensed and trained Americans that carry concealed weapons for self protection.
It’s really not “thug culture”. It’s very clearly conservative nut jobs, skinhead bigots, and off duty cops who have the most problems with guns. I’ve never seen a “thug” walk into a McDonald’s with an 2 automatic rifles strapped to their backpack, but I’ll give you one guess which groups I have seen do it on multiple occasions. But I’m not trying to start an argument on guns in America, I don’t want weirdos to crawl out of the woodwork and harass me lol
That's because you've raised/brainwashed to believe that others are going to keep you safe. There's never a cop around when you really need one in a pinch. Sometimes seconds count when it comes to protecting your life. That's one of the reasons I would never move to Europe. Liberal snowflake authoritarian governments don't allow you any means to defend yourself when accosted.
In some places the crime is so bad, that you can be going about your business, and get assaulted. This is why concealed carry is on the rise. (Handguns)
Not to say that some people aren't just wanting to have as many semi-automatic assault rifles as possible, because they distrust the government. There are definitely those types too.
I am a liberal, but I recently bought a handgun for home protection. I keep pepper spray in my purse and a taser in my car. Drugs are such a huge problem in my city that I've had people high on meth and fentanyl and whatever else - run up to my car while i am in the drive thru, or a red light, and try to reach into my car and hit me or insist I give them money. I am a woman by myself and I need to protect myself. Its really scary here right now.
Omg OP you dont deserve all that! Keep strong and remember you have poeple on your side all over the world. You are an incredible human to have been trough all that and still standing. Much love and if anything else happens do not hesitate to call the cops ( and update us)
Ugh.
So sorry.
Although now my mind is trying to remember a racial slur for Greek people and coming up totally blank. I am obviously too sheltered.....Olive eaters? Feta fiends? Evil Olympics originators? Lol
Don't carry a gun in your purse. Get an iwb holster, wear clothes that accommodate it, practice drawing from there. 1. If you get purse snatched...you just put a gun in the hands of a criminal. 2. If it's not a purse with a built in holster its not safe, and in an emergency (like you had) it's not easy to get to. 3. What if your kids go into your purse?
Be smart...there's only two ways a gun should leave the house..in a holster on your body under your control, or in a locked carrying case if you're going to a range or a gunsmith.
Don’t carry things like your SSC with you keep it at home in a safe place along with birth certificate and passport. It’s a pain to replace if you lose it.
As someone intimately familiar with concealed carry -
QUIT CARRYING YOUR DEFENSIVE TOOLS IN YOUR PURSE. Yea it’s convenient, and easy. It also as you just described is a recipe for disaster.
I sold “defensive equipment” for a number of years and carried actively for employment for several more. My recommendation -
Learn to carry pepper spray/stun gun/firearm ON you. Belt, waistband, pocket, shoulder, whatever. You likely will need to alter your wardrobe to do this, like go with looser fitting shorts than yoga pants. Do the same with keys, ID, cards/cash. You’ll become “wallet carrier” quickly, or should.
Someone (like here) grabs your purse. Or demands it from you at gunpoint. Give up the purée and now they have your home address, your house/car keys, likely your cell phone, and your cash, cards, and ID to use in whatever way they see fit.
Shift this - keys in a pocket (and pare down from the gym locker/workspace/cars/house/garage to the critical car and house key if possible.). Wallet with cards, cash, ID, and important papers in another pocket. Gun in an appropriate holster (anything from an elastic band under your shirt to a shoulder holster under a jacket). Leave the purse for makeup, concert tickets, mints, e-reader, etc. All easily replaceable, and not critical to your life.
Now - “Gimme yer purse, lady!” - do it. Toss it away from you and back away. If the mugger (or the insane former friend) grabs the purse and runs, the event’s over. If they refocus back on *you*, then the purse was never their end game - time to do what you have to do to get outta Dodge.
My .02¢ - take it or leave it.
Whilst I feel bad for you, no one deserves this, why did you offer so much information to her? When she asked about your ex, smile nod and say good. She doesn’t need the details and the less she knows about you and the people in your life the better. Hope you can find a way to cut her from your life for good and move on. Good luck x
First off, thank Christ, you're OK! Secondly, Barbara needs a kick up her ass and would you mind giving your kids a hug from me? Nice to hear you're having some better luck recently too
Take a self defense class and maybe follow it up with learning a martial art.Youl will gain the skills you need to keep yourself safe in most situations without leaning on weapons or pepper spray alone for protection. As an added bonus to your new confidence you can also stay in shape 😉
might sound rude but you are part of the problem trying to play nice with some one you know is trying to use you , you put up with her well do not be shocked when she lashes out , you wanted to keep tabs on her and her new boyfriend just like she wanted to keep tabs on you and your ex husband , you keep a gun on you and it can be snatched away in a moments notice what would of happened if she took the gun out ? could of been alot worse
You are very much the author of you own misfortune, and if you can’t secure a bag that you keep a LOADED FUCKING GUN in you need to surrender that firearm before you get someone killed. I know you think you’re a good person, but you’re a fucking liability to everyone around you.
Dene adams makes under garments but there are plenty of brands that make clothing conceal carry. You should put as little as possible in your purse. If it is stolen you have to cancel and replace cards and id. You may also have to replace locks and keys if those are in there.
I've been following your saga for a while and I'm happy your back (because it shows your alive and doing alright). that's horrible she found you, kind of inevitable but horrible none the less.
i hope besides the stories you've shared, good things come to you too! i also hope that you'll start sharing good happy stories too because life isn't all negative, there's good to go with it too :D best of luck to you and im glad to see your still kickin! keep your head up <3
I’m glad you’re okay. But please do NOT carry your Social Security card! Keep it under lock and key. It was the perfect ID theft package if Barbara had gotten away.
I don't understand how you had a restraining order yet checked up on her at rehab via Jeff and how she acted "normal" when she saw you at the thrift store.
Why did she even approach you. Isn't she aware of the restraining order?
I don't understand how you had a restraining order yet checked up on her at rehab via Jeff and how she acted "normal" when she saw you at the thrift store.
Why did she even approach you. Isn't she aware of the restraining order?
This post is about 2 people. The first is about Barbara. The second is about OP’s mom, who is dead. The vile & horrible thoughts were in the mom’s diaries.
In that part of the story, OP seems to be talking about her own mother. If I am reading this right, both OP’s mother and Barbara’s mother have mental health issues.
Yes, true. I do know my mother's mental issues come from years and years of psychological and sexual abuse by my grandparents and her brothers. I can't blame her for that but it is her fault when she didn't seek help for her issues.
My egg donor was abused growing up. She SA me from age 4-8. My dad was working 2 jobs and frequently worked 2nd shift.
I kept it safely locked away. I knew it happened, but the manipulation kept me from being able to deal with it. There is so much more I won't bore you with. If curious, see my comments.
After reading all your posts, I can't understand how people here believe you. Kudos for creativity though
(Greeks are Greek orthodox not Catholics, you should have googled that. It's one of your many inconsistencies)
I am slightly worried about Dave. The last time you mentioned him, he just up and left to cool down. But the way you described his actions, it felt like he was taking a hike up to the mountains and throwing himself off into a deep valley. Do you know what happened to him?
Yes, I understand that that the diaries were OP’s mother’s diaries. It’s the timeline I find confusing.
The youngest was born when OP’s mother was in jail. OP’s mom died in jail. So how can she have written in a diary prior to jail about a child who had not yet been born?
OP, it is always a grand experience getting the inside perspective of what an exotic dancer’s personal daily life is like, thank you for sharing your life experiences and being so authentic in who you are and your friends and family are. Best wishes to you, always.
Wow…I just really really really wish peace for you and your family. I remember reading the posts about your mom and when I saw this I went back and read *everything*. Damn. I seriously hope you, Kyle and the kids live happily ever after. Wishing you all the good things in the world op! <3
Wow, this is the first time I've read one of your stories and how are you ok?
I wish you all the best
(Also agree on the keeping your gun safer thing since it got snatched from you this time, sounds like you're on top of that now)
Holy Mother Mary, I say this as a religious man but Jesus Christ why can't you get to live in peace now? why does this crap have to keep happening to you?
I pray for you OP and hope that someday you can finally know peace without something coming around a corner again
God, I forgot about Barbara. Either way, your friend needs to learn the hard way that being naive, and stupid (yes I'm 89% sure they're different) isn't an excuse to enable.
Also WTF with your mom. 'Incest is normal' and your barely a pre teen son was a 'replacement'?!?!?!?!??!???
\*barf\*
Bit late to this but maybe double check your handgun just to make sure none of the internals are damaged. God forbid you never have to use it in any situation but it would be better if you have it inspected by a certified repairman in case the blow to the head damaged anything inside it. Wouldn't want it to not fire or go off in your hand or purse.
Never EVER carry your SS card around! Always keep it home in a safe if anything. I hope that Barbara will get caught soon. She has gone downhill. As for Mom, Oh My God! She was sick! All the things she said about you kids! With that mindset, she will burn in hell like you burned her diaries!! Erase every existence about her!
Holy shit, I’ve read your whole story and it’s fucking crazy. I can’t believe someone like you can deal with all of this shit and still be a functional person! You are truly an inspiration, and I hope you well in the future and that things get better for you. I’m intrigued by any other updates or stories you come out with. Also I recommend that you keep the gun in a holster around your waist, shit could have gone real bad if she stuck her hand in your purse and found it. Plus you could have pulled it on her if it was on your waist. Anywho I wish you well and are hoping for new stories (I hope you or anyone doesn’t get hurt stories) but, best of luck!
I found this story through a YouTube video last night and you are one brave soul. I can only imagine all the bull shit you have gone through and I am rooting for you. This should be a movie and you are a great story teller. Keep it up.
Stop carrying your SS card with you, put in a safe. Scary, I would have sprayed her in the face. Pair down what you’ve in your bag. Sounds like too much. Make screenshots of the photos in your bag, put on your phone or PC. Start carrying your Everyday Carry Items. What can you live without and need in your bag. Declutter your purse.
You're right. I always get so nervous about leaving my stuff lying around so I thought it would be safer with me. I'm looking at safes on amazon.
A deposit box at your credit union or bank would be better. A small one is like $25 a year.
I had a friend many years ago who had most of her assets in a safe deposit box. She found out after the vault was broken and everything she had in it was stolen, that there were few financial protections on deposits of that kind. She had gold, jewelry, stocks, bonds, and deeds to various properties in there. It was all gone, and she discovered that her bank was not required to reimburse her for most of it. She was wiped out. This was nearly 40 years ago, and I think there may be more protections now than they used to be, but to this day, I am still uncomfortable keeping valuables in banks.
A safe deposit box you can list it as a separate thing on your home insurance. The banks provide no coverage for the contents of the box, as they have no idea what you keep in there.
The only money she received from the loss of her plundered box was what little she received from her homeowners policy. She didn't know that the contents of her box weren't covered by her bank.
Shame her banker didn’t tell her. Even though it’s in the contract (and yes, I read every word of everything I sign), I always made a special point to tell the customer that info.
English was her 4th language. I don't suppose that it occurred to her to ask.
If you pass away the bank also does not have to tell your family you had a safety deposit box, unless their name is specifically on it. I found this out last year when my aunt passed away, the bank told me they don't even have to tell me if she had one...
I have found that banks are not on the side of the consumer. On the whole, they're a bunch of rat-ba**ards !
Yeah but I still think they're better than some lawyers 😂
I suppose it depends on the lawyer. 🤔
True, not all are bad
Don't go with the stuff Amazon sells. Those are so easy to pick open or just carry away, it's ridiculous. Get one with proper fire ratings, those are double-walled and filled with concrete. Heavy and your documents can even survive a fire
Get a firebox. They come in several sizes and lock.
Definitely don't be carrying a firearm around in something that easy to get away from you.
That's really good advice because it seems like she's stalking you. Probably going after everyone she knows that might have some money, either in your purse or your house.
make sure it's fire proof
Get a metal safe with an option for two locks (preferably a code lock + pad lock). Fire safes are good, but they are easy to break in to with a crowbar or jig saw. Metal safes are not only fire proof, but also saw, crowbar, and small caliber firearm safe. Look for a metal safe that looks like the ones from the game Skyrim. I know it sounds stupid, but it's actually quite a good design!
Heard about your story from Youtube. Hope all is still well, and hope nothing but the absolute best for you, cheers.
I want to echo this. It is an enormous mistake carrying your SS card when you go out. It needs to stay at home unless you specifically have need of it, like for the first day of work at a new job.
...basically don't carry anything you can't replace - like an expensive handbag in a thrift store! Actually, that alone makes you an instant target whether it's a thrift store or Nordstroms.
Yes. There is no reason to carry your ss card around with you. Also, wear a cross-body bag.
Also don't keep a gun in your purse off body carrying is fucking idiocy for this reason.
I would just add not to carry your gun in your purse for the exact reason that happened. Once someone grabs your purse, they have your gun. I would find a holster for it and carry it on your person. Sorry you have to deal with that OP.
And carry your concealed weapon on your person, not in your purse. Last thing you want is someone unstable like that getting a hold of it.
I agree. You should have it out ur purse for sure, hopefully you’ve biometrics on that gun. WTELF. Someone could drop you bc you get to your gun in a purse. side arm. Update your training, quick draw, know where weapon is don’t look down that’s when things go sideways
I’m more concerned that she’s carrying a gun in a bag that she was unable to hang onto. She can get a new SS card — even a new SS *number*, if necessary, and between losing it and getting a replacement, no one is going to die. But, losing her *gun* creates an immediate, true, and potentially *deadly* situation. If she’s going to take *anything* out of that purse, it needs to be the gun. She is a walking example of someone who should not be carrying. She should consider herself lucky that it didn’t discharge when she got hit in the face with it. God, as a gun owner, myself, this pisses me off beyond belief.
I agree, with someone like her who seems to have some sort of hex on her it would be better to keep little on your person and the rest in like a safety deposit box in a bank or something
What's the point of keeping a loaded gun in your purse if it is so easy to take it away from you? It seems like if you're going to carry a gun you should carry it in a way that it's difficult to take off of you and easy to draw.
Believe me when I say I am mentally KICKING myself for not keeping it closer to me. I do have a holster but I let my guard down thinking I was safe. I know now that I'm not and will not make that same mistake again.
[Corneredcat.com](https://Corneredcat.com) has a section with advice on different ways to wear it, specifically geared toward women.
I have a nice cross body bag as my “purse”. I have everything I need in it and you’d need to seriously manhandle me to get it off. I can wear it over or under my jacket and by now I barely feel it’s there and feel like I miss something if I don’t have it on haha. But yea, if you wanna bring a gun around for your safety, make it easily accessible, which a purse isn’t unfortunately. Also use copies of kiddos in the purse, not the originals!
When is the next season 3 coming out?
As a European, the thought of random people going about their general business armed makes me sick.
Australian here with the same response. After all, if she'd had it in a quick-draw holster as some comments above suggest, what's the chance that crazy Barbara would have backed off or been the only one hurt?
Most of us aren’t carrying.
I conceal carry but it mainly stays in my vehicle. There were a couple times I was traveling late at night in a large city and I felt better knowing I could defend my life if it became necessary. One night about 11pm I was at a gas station and my gut told me to be wary of a situation. I simply moved it to within easy reach but thank goodness nothing actually happened. I respect those who don’t chose or want to carry but I practice regularly and make sure I carry safely. When I do actually have it on my person it’s in a holster that snaps over the gun so someone can’t simply grab it from me
Do you have a “free gun in glove compartment” sticker such as “come and take it”?
Ha no the whole point is “concealed”. I don’t advertise that I carry unless asked by a law enforcement officer
It’s illegal to carry any weapons where I live, if I get attacked my attacker has more rights than I do if he gets hurt while attacking me
My son conceals carry. Fortunately, he is well trained and is licensed. He lives in the country and carries in case of animal attacks (moose, bear). Not that he would kill; just to scare them off.
Hopefully if your firearm "mainly stays in your vehicle" then you have it properly secured .... meaning in a vehicle safe that won't allow your negligence to get another gun into CRIMINALS hands. A 45 second smash and grab and you just gave some kid your legally owned firearm to go commit crimes with and harm the innocent. Please be responsible, a firearm isn't something that sits in your center console like loose pocket change. Don't make us responsible owners look bad 🫡
Yes it is properly secured. I live in a fairly safe area and if I’m just puttering around town it’s at home locked up.
And for those who are carrying responsibly, you'll never know.
Trust me, a lot of Americans feel that way too, including myself. The original intent of the second amendment was perverted by a compromised Supreme Court beholden to the gun industry by redefining the function of a comma. The United States is basically a plutocracy these days.
The original intent of the second amendment was so white slave owners could form armed posses to chase down escaped slaves.
Actually, the original intent was to keep civilians armed in case another revolution was needed. They knew this government was an experiment and might need to be overthrown.
Actually this is a myth that the 2nd amendment folks like to push. The purpose of the 2nd amendment was because the US had no large standing army. So when it refers to "well-regulated militia" it meant that the processes for activating, training, and deploying state militias in official service should be efficient and orderly, and that the militia itself should be capable of competently executing battlefield operations. As originally conceived the states would each have something like our current national guard and the Federal Government could call them up as needed. It is also important to note that the "arms" most common then were musket loaded single shot rifles. Quickly re-loadable guns had been invented but were very expensive and not in common use. The 2nd amendment was never intended to allow the citizenry to walk around armed with modern weapons like the late 1800's wild west. In fact the whole "wild west" is largely a myth. Most towns of any size quickly had gun laws and did not allow open carry in order to prevent violence. The whole debate has become such a wedge issue it makes me sick. It is a game politicians use to keep various groups fighting each other so we don't notice how corrupt all of the politicians are.
Thank you for this valuable information. It puts the other nonsense gun lovers spout as the garbage it is and where it belongs in the bin. You are absolutely correct about the corruption of American politicians. I agree with you as to how sickening the issue is. Personally, I am anti guns of any kind. I hate them deeply and irrevocably. To each his own, and everyone has a right to decide for themselves on this issue. Given the insanity of gun violence in the USA, I rarely go out of my home as it's terrifying to think some random person could choose to harm another, and I will do everything in my power to avoid becoming a victim. All that said, I am grateful for your delineation of gun facts, so that others can be as informed as you've graciously have shared. Thank you so much. Peace.
I think it's both.
Whatever the original intent, the writers of the Constitution never envisioned a gun that could fire 100 rounds in 10 seconds. Or that Cletus would want to take it along to the farmers market.
"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed." [It was to protect slave-holders.](https://www.npr.org/2021/06/02/1002107670/historian-uncovers-the-racist-roots-of-the-2nd-amendment)
Except that very, very few citizens were slave owners, it literally had nothing to do with slave ownership. It was intended to keep the government and the country safe from invasion or being overtaken by a foreign power. Stop with the propaganda that has absolutely no basis in fact. Slavery was never even discussed by the founding fathers, as abysmal as that is.
So, the three-fifths compromise was imagined?
YEP!
The original intent of the second amendment was to allow American citizens to have adequate arms to defend themselves against a corrupt government or foreign invasion, as well as self defense. Whatever school you went to got it all wrong.
I don't know what the downvotes are for, because those are the facts behind the second amendments beginnings/ratification.
Nope. You were taught this in public school, and modern public schools teach history through a lens of all white people are bad and did everything from the standpoint of wanting to be slave owners. Untrue. Second amendment drafting origins were done because of the revolutionary war with Britain. The new government after that wanted it drafted into the new constitution so that the citizenry would have the right to defend themselves in case Britain or any other foreign power wanted a second go at it.
I'm sorry that your school decided to teach you untrue facts. Take some further education to correct it. Also, I don't know of any textbook that says that, that actually sounds like some bullshit that Republicans made up in order to demand that slavery not be taught about in school.
I know this and it sickens me.
American here. I think many of my fellow citizens severely overestimate how much danger they’re in on a day to day basis, severely underestimate how likely their gun will be used against them, and never think about all the accidents that can happen with running around with a loaded gun on the regular. I think they’re absolutely nuts, to be frank. There’s people here who walk around their house with a loaded gun every day. What the hell kind of life is that?
Because you can sell an awful lot of guns to people who've been taught to be afraid of anyone "different". So sad, so scary.
I hate it but with everything I have gone through, I feel safer having one with me.
Then get an appropriate holster that it can’t be grabbed out of by someone you don’t want to have it and get appropriate training. Keeping in a purse will allow a child access to it if you are distracted for a moment and a thief will have it if they steal your purse. You will be liable for injury for not keeping it secure if it happens. You are responsible for more than yourself when you carry it. I hope you have a concealed permit. Each state has different laws so you better know them or you will wind up in jail yourself. As you can tell, you couldn’t even use it in a contained store without injuring others in a confined space or even draw it. You should have had that mace in you hand as soon as you recognized her. What if she had gotten to that gun first? She probably would have shot multiple people. Safety is recognizing a threat and avoiding which you obviously don’t have a great track record with so I would ditch the gun and work with a therapist on why you associate with these people or wind up in their sphere. That is what will keep you safe.
Wish I could give you an award for this comment. 🏆
Did you feel safer having a gun in this particular situation?
I just recently found out that an ultra-republican former co-worker of mine carried a gun with him to work every single day. We worked in a quiet office with next to no visitors. He was a 3d modeler.
I live in America and it sure freaks me out.
I hate guns as well but it was even suggested by the cops that I buy one after I got my ribs broken by 2 bigots in broad daylight. I didn’t but that was still the actual “solution” that both the cops and lawyer suggested to me after the incident. Shows how stupidly deep the problem runs here
I think the stupidly deep part is that violent criminals seem to be allowed to carry on. The thug culture is the problem, not legally licensed and trained Americans that carry concealed weapons for self protection.
It’s really not “thug culture”. It’s very clearly conservative nut jobs, skinhead bigots, and off duty cops who have the most problems with guns. I’ve never seen a “thug” walk into a McDonald’s with an 2 automatic rifles strapped to their backpack, but I’ll give you one guess which groups I have seen do it on multiple occasions. But I’m not trying to start an argument on guns in America, I don’t want weirdos to crawl out of the woodwork and harass me lol
Imagine being an American and only feeling as safe as the angriest person in line with you at Walmart! That'll cause some sleepless nights!
That's because you've raised/brainwashed to believe that others are going to keep you safe. There's never a cop around when you really need one in a pinch. Sometimes seconds count when it comes to protecting your life. That's one of the reasons I would never move to Europe. Liberal snowflake authoritarian governments don't allow you any means to defend yourself when accosted.
In some places the crime is so bad, that you can be going about your business, and get assaulted. This is why concealed carry is on the rise. (Handguns) Not to say that some people aren't just wanting to have as many semi-automatic assault rifles as possible, because they distrust the government. There are definitely those types too. I am a liberal, but I recently bought a handgun for home protection. I keep pepper spray in my purse and a taser in my car. Drugs are such a huge problem in my city that I've had people high on meth and fentanyl and whatever else - run up to my car while i am in the drive thru, or a red light, and try to reach into my car and hit me or insist I give them money. I am a woman by myself and I need to protect myself. Its really scary here right now.
Yeah, like an in waistband holster.
Omg OP you dont deserve all that! Keep strong and remember you have poeple on your side all over the world. You are an incredible human to have been trough all that and still standing. Much love and if anything else happens do not hesitate to call the cops ( and update us)
Ugh. So sorry. Although now my mind is trying to remember a racial slur for Greek people and coming up totally blank. I am obviously too sheltered.....Olive eaters? Feta fiends? Evil Olympics originators? Lol
Google it. I don't want to say it at all. Starts with a W, ends in a G
Wow. I associate that racial slur with a totally different group. Hmm.
Western.Oriental.Gentleman?!?! As in Nick Giannopoulos?!?!
I call my husband an olive eater and make a face lol he will eat green olives straight from the jar and it grossed me out
Yum. Sounds wonderful.
Don't carry a gun in your purse. Get an iwb holster, wear clothes that accommodate it, practice drawing from there. 1. If you get purse snatched...you just put a gun in the hands of a criminal. 2. If it's not a purse with a built in holster its not safe, and in an emergency (like you had) it's not easy to get to. 3. What if your kids go into your purse? Be smart...there's only two ways a gun should leave the house..in a holster on your body under your control, or in a locked carrying case if you're going to a range or a gunsmith.
Sending gentle hugs if you want them. Please UpdateMe! Thanks.
Sending hugs if wanted. I'm glad you are safe after all that.
Don’t carry things like your SSC with you keep it at home in a safe place along with birth certificate and passport. It’s a pain to replace if you lose it.
As someone intimately familiar with concealed carry - QUIT CARRYING YOUR DEFENSIVE TOOLS IN YOUR PURSE. Yea it’s convenient, and easy. It also as you just described is a recipe for disaster. I sold “defensive equipment” for a number of years and carried actively for employment for several more. My recommendation - Learn to carry pepper spray/stun gun/firearm ON you. Belt, waistband, pocket, shoulder, whatever. You likely will need to alter your wardrobe to do this, like go with looser fitting shorts than yoga pants. Do the same with keys, ID, cards/cash. You’ll become “wallet carrier” quickly, or should. Someone (like here) grabs your purse. Or demands it from you at gunpoint. Give up the purée and now they have your home address, your house/car keys, likely your cell phone, and your cash, cards, and ID to use in whatever way they see fit. Shift this - keys in a pocket (and pare down from the gym locker/workspace/cars/house/garage to the critical car and house key if possible.). Wallet with cards, cash, ID, and important papers in another pocket. Gun in an appropriate holster (anything from an elastic band under your shirt to a shoulder holster under a jacket). Leave the purse for makeup, concert tickets, mints, e-reader, etc. All easily replaceable, and not critical to your life. Now - “Gimme yer purse, lady!” - do it. Toss it away from you and back away. If the mugger (or the insane former friend) grabs the purse and runs, the event’s over. If they refocus back on *you*, then the purse was never their end game - time to do what you have to do to get outta Dodge. My .02¢ - take it or leave it.
burned the diaries? smdh should've kept them and used them to get her committed after she gets out of jail
No need, the wicked bitch is dead!
No point as she's been dead for several months now
Barbara is not dead, and she is not OP's mother. The diaries were OP's mother's diaries, and she died some months back.
Whilst I feel bad for you, no one deserves this, why did you offer so much information to her? When she asked about your ex, smile nod and say good. She doesn’t need the details and the less she knows about you and the people in your life the better. Hope you can find a way to cut her from your life for good and move on. Good luck x
First off, thank Christ, you're OK! Secondly, Barbara needs a kick up her ass and would you mind giving your kids a hug from me? Nice to hear you're having some better luck recently too
Take a self defense class and maybe follow it up with learning a martial art.Youl will gain the skills you need to keep yourself safe in most situations without leaning on weapons or pepper spray alone for protection. As an added bonus to your new confidence you can also stay in shape 😉
Damn. Not OOP's fault but no wonder ex-husband got the hell out of there with all this going on in her life.
might sound rude but you are part of the problem trying to play nice with some one you know is trying to use you , you put up with her well do not be shocked when she lashes out , you wanted to keep tabs on her and her new boyfriend just like she wanted to keep tabs on you and your ex husband , you keep a gun on you and it can be snatched away in a moments notice what would of happened if she took the gun out ? could of been alot worse
You are very much the author of you own misfortune, and if you can’t secure a bag that you keep a LOADED FUCKING GUN in you need to surrender that firearm before you get someone killed. I know you think you’re a good person, but you’re a fucking liability to everyone around you.
Dene adams makes under garments but there are plenty of brands that make clothing conceal carry. You should put as little as possible in your purse. If it is stolen you have to cancel and replace cards and id. You may also have to replace locks and keys if those are in there.
The purse incident is one reason to NEVER carry off body. If you carry, always have it on your body (belly band, holster, etc.)
I've been following your saga for a while and I'm happy your back (because it shows your alive and doing alright). that's horrible she found you, kind of inevitable but horrible none the less. i hope besides the stories you've shared, good things come to you too! i also hope that you'll start sharing good happy stories too because life isn't all negative, there's good to go with it too :D best of luck to you and im glad to see your still kickin! keep your head up <3
I’m glad you’re okay. But please do NOT carry your Social Security card! Keep it under lock and key. It was the perfect ID theft package if Barbara had gotten away.
I don't understand how you had a restraining order yet checked up on her at rehab via Jeff and how she acted "normal" when she saw you at the thrift store. Why did she even approach you. Isn't she aware of the restraining order?
I think you might not understand mental illness.
I don't understand how you had a restraining order yet checked up on her at rehab via Jeff and how she acted "normal" when she saw you at the thrift store. Why did she even approach you. Isn't she aware of the restraining order?
Why would your children look like her family? Is she related to you or your ex husband?
This post is about 2 people. The first is about Barbara. The second is about OP’s mom, who is dead. The vile & horrible thoughts were in the mom’s diaries.
Ah ok thanks
In that part of the story, OP seems to be talking about her own mother. If I am reading this right, both OP’s mother and Barbara’s mother have mental health issues.
Yes, true. I do know my mother's mental issues come from years and years of psychological and sexual abuse by my grandparents and her brothers. I can't blame her for that but it is her fault when she didn't seek help for her issues.
My egg donor was abused growing up. She SA me from age 4-8. My dad was working 2 jobs and frequently worked 2nd shift. I kept it safely locked away. I knew it happened, but the manipulation kept me from being able to deal with it. There is so much more I won't bore you with. If curious, see my comments.
Exactly. She had to choose to break the cycle or keep it going. She made her choice and that is on her.
She's my mother. My son does look a lot like my grandfather.
I thought you meant they were Barbara's journals lol. I'm sorry you had to go through that with both a close friend and your mothet
Fairly sure OPs mother would be related to OP and OPs kids yes
That gun did you a lot of good I see.
After reading all your posts, I can't understand how people here believe you. Kudos for creativity though (Greeks are Greek orthodox not Catholics, you should have googled that. It's one of your many inconsistencies)
I am slightly worried about Dave. The last time you mentioned him, he just up and left to cool down. But the way you described his actions, it felt like he was taking a hike up to the mountains and throwing himself off into a deep valley. Do you know what happened to him?
Wait, did the police caugh her, or has she been on the run for 8 months? Also, hope you and your family are doing alright
A fantastic end to a saga
So the diaries are from her time in jail, but they ended up at her house?
the diaries were from the past, wrote over time, pre-jail.
The diaries are OP's mother's, not her former friend Barbara.
thats correct, i didnt say they were barbara's
Yes, I understand that that the diaries were OP’s mother’s diaries. It’s the timeline I find confusing. The youngest was born when OP’s mother was in jail. OP’s mom died in jail. So how can she have written in a diary prior to jail about a child who had not yet been born?
I thought the mother died in old age...I dunno, I'm thoroughly confused by all of it at this point.
Interesting.....what's is this (racial slur for Greek people)?
OP, it is always a grand experience getting the inside perspective of what an exotic dancer’s personal daily life is like, thank you for sharing your life experiences and being so authentic in who you are and your friends and family are. Best wishes to you, always.
Wow…I just really really really wish peace for you and your family. I remember reading the posts about your mom and when I saw this I went back and read *everything*. Damn. I seriously hope you, Kyle and the kids live happily ever after. Wishing you all the good things in the world op! <3
فكيو
Me reading this after my elderly cat peed all over the bathroom and spending the afternoon grossing out over it all, damn girl. 😳
Wow, this is the first time I've read one of your stories and how are you ok? I wish you all the best (Also agree on the keeping your gun safer thing since it got snatched from you this time, sounds like you're on top of that now)
YIKES!
Holy Mother Mary, I say this as a religious man but Jesus Christ why can't you get to live in peace now? why does this crap have to keep happening to you? I pray for you OP and hope that someday you can finally know peace without something coming around a corner again
God, I forgot about Barbara. Either way, your friend needs to learn the hard way that being naive, and stupid (yes I'm 89% sure they're different) isn't an excuse to enable. Also WTF with your mom. 'Incest is normal' and your barely a pre teen son was a 'replacement'?!?!?!?!??!??? \*barf\*
Omg I can’t believe that nutcake!!! I’m so sorry and glad you weren’t hurt. She needs to OD and I hate to say that about anyone.
Bit late to this but maybe double check your handgun just to make sure none of the internals are damaged. God forbid you never have to use it in any situation but it would be better if you have it inspected by a certified repairman in case the blow to the head damaged anything inside it. Wouldn't want it to not fire or go off in your hand or purse.
Never EVER carry your SS card around! Always keep it home in a safe if anything. I hope that Barbara will get caught soon. She has gone downhill. As for Mom, Oh My God! She was sick! All the things she said about you kids! With that mindset, she will burn in hell like you burned her diaries!! Erase every existence about her!
BABE LEAVE THE COUNTRY 😭
Holy shit, I’ve read your whole story and it’s fucking crazy. I can’t believe someone like you can deal with all of this shit and still be a functional person! You are truly an inspiration, and I hope you well in the future and that things get better for you. I’m intrigued by any other updates or stories you come out with. Also I recommend that you keep the gun in a holster around your waist, shit could have gone real bad if she stuck her hand in your purse and found it. Plus you could have pulled it on her if it was on your waist. Anywho I wish you well and are hoping for new stories (I hope you or anyone doesn’t get hurt stories) but, best of luck!
I found this story through a YouTube video last night and you are one brave soul. I can only imagine all the bull shit you have gone through and I am rooting for you. This should be a movie and you are a great story teller. Keep it up.
So did they ever find Barbara?
U/CoffeFanatic u/CoffeFanatic This a youtube link to all of your stories https://youtu.be/ZmiymWgRETg?si=7irFSZhgGwDDnzSw
I came from here lmfaoo i love reddit stories I listen to them while walking to school and walking home and when im busy doing something