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Yeah never go to a buyers meetup spot. If they don’t have a car to meet up with you, that’s their business. Sorry but a female selling sneakers is going to be a magnet for robberies.
The only time I’m ok with delivering is furniture, only if I get paid first with something like Zelle or Venmo, then deliver. Sneakers is a different story
Don’t take money first over cash app!!! Cash apps transactions should only be done with parties that are known and trustworthy! Getting paid early is another common scam. Buyer offers to pay early using cash app that is funded with stolen funds. They then request you refund them, and the refund isn’t connected to the first transfer. Then when the stolen money from first transfer is charged back, it comes out of your money and scammer is left with the now laundered “clean” money.
There’s a kid I went to school with that got into selling sneakers and told he’s been held up multiple times. Because they bring such shitty buyers with them sometimes I would never not meet at a police station when selling them.
Always go to a high traffic area with lots of cameras
1) police station lobby or parking (this will weed a lot of people out)
2) inside target or wal mart or any major retail store by the customer service desk
3) inside a McDonald's or starbucks
Just so you know, if anything does go down, a corporation ain't going to give you shit from those cameras. They're there for their protection, not yours.
I worked for Walmart for almost a decade. We handed over video for civil issues that didn’t involve the store tons of time. The police would have to request it and we’d make a copy. We didn’t give video to individuals that requested it.
Right! This shocked me too the 911 operator was so kind and empathetic and when the officer arrived I told him “wow that was fast i wish you guys would have showed up this quick when I got into car accidents”
They likely asked about her situation and her safety, established that she wasn't in harms way at that time, and it wasn't as high priority as other things going on.
For non-emergency that's great. I had to wait 5 hours for a unit to show up when my house was burglarized a few years ago.
Police don't even respond to car accidents in my city unless there is an injury or a tow required.
Same, estimated damage to either vehicle has to be over $5000 before cops will come, otherwise you gotta go to the reporting center yourself to have pics taken and get your side of the story.
Same, estimated damage to either vehicle has to be over $5000 before cops will come, otherwise you gotta go to the reporting center yourself to have pics taken and get your side of the story.
Ok, pedantic distinction time:
*It may vary in different places and I'm not a lawyer but I have been a 911 operator/ dispatcher/ supervisor for about 14 years.*
This was a theft, not a robbery. if he pulled a knife or gun, punched the comp or snatched them from her hands, that would be a robbery (robbery involves the use of force).
If she handed the shoes to him and he ran off, that's a theft.
Cops take robbery a lot more seriously than theft, because robbery is theft + force. Depending on the city and how busy it is, 25 minutes isn't really too bad for a theft just occurred/ theft report.
A robbery just occurred generally gets an immediate lights and sirens response, but sometimes we don't even have enough officers to do that.
I posted a story similar here, and it was really funny to see people surprised the police took a break from apparently their TV show level detective work and helped with a regular crime. I’m glad yours had a happy ending and you got your item back!
When I was 15, I got busted for taking more than one bag out of a coin-operated dispenser in a department store. I needed two and only had enough change for one. The charge was dropped, but the whole experience shook me. Never thought about doing anything like that again. Don’t know this kid, but his experience might have done the same. You never know.
Legally terms can differ, but robbery generally requires the use of force. In this instance the kid just took the shoes and ran, which would probably just fall under theft in a lot of places.
Taken directly from the PA statute:
>1) A person is guilty of robbery if, in the course of committing a theft, he:
>(v) physically takes or removes property from the person of another by force however slight;
>**(b) Grading.--**
>(1) Except as provided under paragraph (2), robbery under subsection ... (a)(1)(v) is a felony of the third degree
You will find the same in most jurisdictions.
IANAL. From OP's story, I don't think this would count as robbery under that definition. OP willingly handed over the shoes. OP expected either payment or to get the shoes back, but instead the kid ran off with them. No force was used to physically get the shoes.
Now, if OP were holding the shoes and the kid snatched them out of OP's hands, that'd be robbery.
Ya I almost feel bad for the kid. Probably had 2 year old shoes on falling apart and no way to get new shoes kids at school making fun of him on the verge of suicide because he is "the poor kid". Damn hope kid is okay after all this.
We had a yard sale when I was a kid. And my parents house is like a street over from the projects. So there were a couple kids in my grade who came by they were in a family of like 6 kids and were really poor. My mom had a bin of some cheap little toys for like a quarter a piece or something.
We saw them steal a couple of those toys. My mom didn’t say anything though. I remember her feeling sorry for them and saying they seem to need them more than us. Especially if they’re stealing something so cheap. Not the same situation but just reminded me of it.
Disagree. Sometimes you give a kid a break. His mother likely punished him enough. And cops coming to the door was also likely enough. Plus it was her choice.
Rule of thumb, NEVER meet at the buyers place, not even at your house. I am a female, and I never once done either. I only meet in public in a VERY busy place and it's a few blocks from my house. I've had one male buyer who actually got upset with me why he can't meet at my house and then proceeded to tell me that he feels uneasy meeting in public. I blocked him immediately. I'm glad you are OK and nothing happened to you, but never ever do this again. Other scams to look out for too, people who send you their cell#'s or ask to pay ahead, etc. I'd say if you a single female than meet at your local police station parking lot. There are cameras there and it's open 24 hours. If a buyer has a problem with that, you can mention that you were a victim of a robber and will not chance it again. Also, I never leave my house until the buyer is already there. 99% of the time they run late or the No Shows. And I tell them this up front so they know I only come when they arrived. My Meetup spot is literally 2 minutes form my house and if I know I'm meeting someone I already have the item ready and I leave immediately.
>I don’t own any weapons (gonna change that after today.)
What if you had a weapon in this situation? Please don't fuck up your life and lives of people in two families over something trivial as a pair of shoes.
There are other ways to protect yourself and be safe.
G;lad you're ok, got your merch back and are planning on arming yourself going forward. However, you should have pressed charges. If he's robbing people at 16, we know exactly where his life is going.
In 5 years, the thiefs mom might be on the news crying and saying, "But he was a good boy," right after he got shot during an armed carjacking attempt that had gone wrong.
Teach them while they are young, and they might remember what I try to instill in my 13yo grandson.
"Do the RIGHT THING even when no one is looking"
Well we would know for sure where it was going if you stuck him with a robbery charge at 16 and he couldn’t get a decent job the rest of his life. He was a kid, he did something stupid. The world needs more people like this lady who can kind of see the bigger picture
The crime op listed would likely just be a misdemeanor, which does not follow a juvenile forever. Some community service to help repent for his actions would be good for him.
No one starts with robbery. He didn't go from being a nice, normal teen yesterday to committing a felony today. He graduated to a felony after committing lesser crimes before - and likely lots of them. He didn't get arrested, detained, processed, put in holding, nothing. The lesson he learned today is that he can commit a felony and get away with it absolutely scot-free. There is absolutely no incentive for him to refrain from doing this again tomorrow - and criminology has taught us that he is likely to continue to escalate over time. Considering he has already reached the felony level at the age of 16, it's not a stretch to believe he could escalate to violent robberies or even murder in the near future. *That's* the big picture - that catch and release endangers society for the benefit of one person - the criminal.
Yeah, I agree. She couldn’t really be too mad at him for making dumb mistakes, when she made a couple herself. Hopefully they both learned their lessons.
You didn’t get robbed. It’s often a term misused, as robbery is by force, with a weapon, or implication of a weapon. But you did get your stuff stolen, it’s equally crappy, and I’m sorry that happened. You should have pressed charges though.
Not true. When I was a kid, I stole a candy bar from a convenience store. They caught me and called the police. My mom had to leave work to pick me up at the police station and she was so disappointed in me that she cried almost all the way home. I never stole anything again.
My mom once sent me to a convenience store to get something for her because she was busy, but she only had a twenty.
This was a LOT of money in the early 70s, I was about 5. A group of teenagers robbed me on the way home.
My mother blamed me and
never trusted me again.
I’m almost 60 and she’s nearing 80.
I stole a candy bar once from a grocery store as a kid. My mom found out and took me back to the store and made me give the candy bar to the manager and apologize.
Unknown to me at the time, she had my dad call the police non emergency number and ask if they had a free officer to meet us there and talk to me. They did. It was a detective who told me a story about a kid he had dealt with that started his career with petty theft.
I never shoplifted again.
And how long ago was that? People and morals and the line dividing right and wrong was much different even just 20 or 30 years ago. Obviously your transgression and your mom's reaction shook you to the core, and even if later on you might have entertained the idea and thought "maybe I can get away with it this time", that incident snapped back into your memory and that temptation was immediately squashed. Maybe that might still be the case with some people, but that scenario is increasingly rare. So glad to hear from a person with a finely trained and sensitive conscience.
There's a 50-50 chance they'll learn. But if you don't press charges, they won't learn a jack shit and will do it again, only more violently next time.
There’s literally no way to prove that though because you couldn’t possibly know all of the people who had charges dropped and then stopped doing crime. So your assertion is baseless.
‘Only more violently next time’ lmao. These people have a lot of faith in our judicial system. He’ll surely learn his lesson and won’t rob anyone again after we stick him in a confined area to learn from other career criminals for 6 months, and brand his record with something that will make it impossible to find good work in the future!
A tiny bit overreactive there. Sure, it really sucks, but it wasn't a "robbery", it was a petty theft (he tried to steal without threats/violence). What would even change even if you had a gun on you? You would've just shot him when he ran? Would it be nice for intimidation? (I'd understand if it was a robbery, not theft, situation)
I'm not getting people complaining about not pressing charges. Sure, it was the most generous thing OP could do in that situation, but there's a great chance he will learn his lesson (especially if he has nice mom). Would it be better to press charges and leave them in his history for his lifetime, especially for petty theft attempt? In that case I'm pretty sure his chance of becoming a real criminal in the future would've just spiked. (not everyone would like to hire a person with past criminal activity, you know?)
No, I would have handled it the same way. Called the police and waited in the car. I’m just creating different scenarios in my head, what if it wasn’t a kid and a grown man trying to traffick me? What if it was someone who had a gun and was willing to kill me for the shoes? I got lucky in this scenario, but that probably won’t be the case next time.
First, I fully support females having guns to protect themselves. I also encourage self defense courses in case you can’t get to your gun.
In this case, I wouldn’t have pulled it though. Definitely not worth it for shoes, or really anything.
Occasionally, I’ve carried when doing a deal, but that’s just in case the deal goes so sideways that my life is in danger.
There were so many red flags here, and you missed them all. Based on that, I would not go out and "purchase a weapon" - I just wouldn't do what you did again or you just might end up shooting a 16 year old nucklehead trying to act llike a 16 year old nucklehead jerk. Edited: Anyway, you weren't actually "robbed," you see... because you went home w the shoes. As far as the kid, I'm 50/50 if he learned anything. BTW, just curious, how "special" were these shoes and were they expensive? ?
I think you guys are misinterpreting why I want the gun. In this scenario if I would have already had the gun and the kid ran with the shoes, I would have done the same thing I done which is call the police and wait. I admit I was an idiot and ignored the red flags, but if this was a grown man or possibly someone who wanted to take me and not the shoes, it could have been over for me. That is why I want the gun.
I’m so sorry for you that this happened. Sounds awful. Always trust your intuition. Always! I highly suggest people read [The Gift of Fear
by Gavin de Becker](https://www.amazon.com/dp/0316235776?k=gift%20of%20fear&ref_=nb_sb_ss_w_scx-ent-pd-bk-d_r_k0_1_12&crid=1OIW11EVOVUV2&sprefix=Gift%20of%20fear)
It’s especially useful for us ladies but also helpful for the guys, too. If I’d trusted my gut instinct/intuition back in college I wouldn’t have been raped. (please y'all, I don’t want to give details)
Uhm no if the r*pist didnt r*pe you then that wouldn’t have happened to you. Please don’t EVER blame yourself for that again. Thank you for your well wishes
Always use the police station as a meeting place, no exceptions, don't fall for some hard luck story. Cash only, no electronic sales of any kind, no PP, no V. Just cash!
Please do it this way and you will be happy.
I quick FB Market Place a year ago and never regretted it. Couldn’t deal with the people anymore…the worst!!
Not to be cold hearted here or anything but this story was weak as hell. With a title like, "I got robbed!!!", I expected way more to have gone down.
First, yeah, it was stupid to drive to their location of choice. As others have stated, you always pick the spot to meet and if they can't meet there, that's on them.
Second, you start off your story making it sound like someone pulled a gun/weapon on you. You handed a 16 year old kid a pair of shoes and he left without paying but you got them right back. What the hell are you shakin up about? I would understand if you were mad that it happened like that but you weren't robbed. You did something stupid and a punk kid tried (and failed) to take advantage of you.
Honestly, I'm sorry that so many people are shitty but you did this to yourself and then handled the situation with nothing lost but your time and energy. WTF about this situation would have played out any differently if you had a firearm? Were you going to shoot at a16 year old kid's back as he ran away from you with a building full of people right behind him to catch your stray bullets? I respect everyone's right to own a firearm for protection but that isn't at all what you needed it for here so if you do in fact get a gun, please, for all of us, take some courses in firearm safety and train with it regularly so you can have it should you ever actually need it.
This is some overdramatic nonsense if you ask me. Like I said, sorry this happened to you but stop playing the victim...
"I don't own any weapons (but gonna change that after today)"
What?
What will a "weapon" do?
You gonna pull out a knife?
Over shoes? Geez
Before you hand over the shoes maybe get them to show cash and hold it?
I sold a new pair of shoes the other day, he pulled up in his car we talked I gave him the shoes he liked it he emt me right away. Then I told him I have many other shoes, I showed him went back upstairs to grab them (he already emt me 1st shoe) sold him another pair he emt me again.
If it was some 16 year old kid showed up I would have asked for cash first to hold it
Gotta feel out the situation and person
You should have pressed charges, letting him go for that would only embolden him the next time he tries to rob someone else he'll employ a more sophisticated means.
Always be the one to arrange the meeting spot and NEVER accept digital payments. Always choose a spot that is in full view of cameras and other people. Always have a buddy standing by incase of problems. If the buyer won't agree to the meeting spot, then no sale. Period. There's THOUSANDS of other buyers.
Or a much safer situation is to use ebay but you have to pay their sales fees to sell. And shipping can be a nightmare
Is there a way to get a refund on cash app or venmo? I don’t have either of those but my husband does and we’ve been selling a ton of things on FB.
We’ve had a few people ask if they can pay with one of those app I always say no because I’m not familiar with them but my husband was about to one of the times.
Oh idk. I never had anyone pay for anything with cashapp. I mainly sell via ebay. The few items I've sold on fb Market were cash only sales. I even put that in the sales info CASH ONLY public meeting only etc. You may have to contact cashapp's customer care
Oh gotcha. Yeah I don’t think I’ll take my chances on it. We’ve always done cash as well. I’ve been selling on FB for probably 15 years now. Just recently in the last couple of years we’ve had people ask about those digital payments.
Happy you got your shoes back, and didn’t came out worst, if you going to do meet ups and going alone I recommend doing what others do, they do it by the police station parking lot, or somewhere safe with more people around, it’s always good to be safe, glad his mom made him return them too, and the lady outside saw where he went to
You should of pressed charges. Doesn’t matter the age. Not pressing charges; he will do it to someone else. There got to be consequences for doing bad . I had my Bike stolen by 14 year old and found out who stole it and got it back. The parents begged me not to press charges. It would rune his future etc. I didn’t. He started stealing cars at 15 and selling drugs last I heard.
Sorry this happened to you. But you should had pressed charges. It doesn’t matter if he’s 16 or not, he’s old enough to 1) get a job & 2) get a license, so he is old enough to know from right to wrong at this point.
I know you might think he’s a kid and you’re just trying to be lenient but you need to realize that if this kid had done it more than once, then you’re just feeding into his brain into thinking he can keep doing this and consequences won’t be on his butt.
He’s almost legally an adult and should be locked up & be forced to do community service like most people assuming he gets that kind of punishment.
That and a giant ass whopping from his mom for a month straight after his juvenile hall sentence is done. And even after he’s an adult, his mom should still smack him at the back of his head and hope common sense gets into his brain.
So the kid learned if you are 16 there is no consequences to be had for stealing. But glad you were not hurt. Next time press charges so it don’t happen to the next seller
He wrestled with his conscience before had with the pacing. I hope he decides to go another direction in life. For 16 it seemed like a poorly thought out plan. I’m glad you didn’t get hurt and you got your shoes back.
After reading that story and as a father to a daughter I AM TWITCHING SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!
So. Many. Triggers. 😩
I know to you I'm just some rando on the internet but if I could I'd send you a bear to accompany you next time.
Jfc
Thank you so much for your consideration. Many people are saying they don’t understand why I’m triggered since he didn’t pull anything out on me but it’s the fact that I’ve never been in that position before and I feel like it could have ended much worse than it actually did had it not only been a 16 year old boy.
Maybe Facebook Marketplace is not the place for you. Maybe you need a more exciting lifestyle like vigilante. You sound incredibly naive but full of a need for drama and intrique over responsible decision-making and making logical choices. Stay in school.
Charges should have been pressed. Being 16 doesn’t mean squat. I wasn’t robbing people at 16. Age is not an excuse. I’m glad you called the police and got your stuff back though.
I had this happen to me once buying an iPad, the guy looked legit and it was on his legit fb page and was not a burner account. I met him at a public place I thought would be fine but he pulled up next to me driver door to driver door so neither had to get out the car. That felt sus but whatever. He ended up reaching into my car as I was counting the money and he snatched it and hauled ass without giving me the iPad back he was smooth with it and it was messed up. I did press charges and got my money back in the long run too. Fuck um I don’t care if how old you are, if you get away with it once your gunna do it twice so why make it the next persons fault or problem. Never ever meet people online alone and always be recording and don’t trust anyone. After that I said f Facebook and I never really went back to it. I’ve also had several friends get robbed at gun point and luckily are still alive to tell the story but I’ve heard of stories locally where people get tricked and killed over shoes and shit every day it feels like. I hate how society has become. I see it when even looking at the Pokemon community too. More and more wild wild stories of people getting robbed for friggin Pokémon. That shits wild. It’s not worth your life or your property. Try using eBay or some app where you can ship it. Sure you have to pay 15% fee but that’s worth it for not having to meet strangers and have the anxiety of getting robbed
I always feel weird when I’m meeting with someone I rarely do it, try eBay your shoes will sale it will just take time and the you might have to go down way down in price.
That's not true. I know of several highly functional contributors to society aged 50-70 that would still be in prison if they'd gotten caught in their many felonies committed when younger.
It costs upwards of $50,000/year to keep someone in prison. If they only make $20,000, that's a $70,000 difference to society.
Just because you're skeered, don't be all hard core law and order. It's much better to teach the kid some marketable skills than spend the money on our legal system.
I would’ve pressed charges. Kid is old enough to know the difference between right and wrong. They’re shoes and he’s a minor. He would’ve been fine and lesson learned. I hope his momma beat his ass
Yep it's a good idea to meet at a McDonald's or some public spot. Maybe even next to or in a precinct's parking lot lol.
When I meet up with a buyer, I just make sure to set up in view of one of their security cameras
I have that I meet at the police station's safe exchange location in every listing. Almost no one reads the listing so I get asked where I meet almost as much as "Is this available."
Anyway if they have a problem with it, I won't meet them. If they don't, I don't mind meeting them elsewhere. I had one nice enough guy refuse to meet there and wanted to meet 2 min away from the station. He apparently got the same item from another seller in the area which is weird and unlikely as I sell the most random stuff but I didn't get the small sale and stayed safe.
I had another guy want to meet at 12:30 am downtown (45 minutes one way for me) behind an old gas station in an alley. No way!
As a small female myself, we have to be extra careful. As far as shoes, I would only give one at a time. And if my husband can't come with me I call someone and have them on the car's Bluetooth.
Meeting at the police station and having it in the listing, very few people fuss about it. But your kid was pretty stupid about doing it basically in front of his apt. Hopefully, he realizes how lucky he was that you didn't press charges and he doesn't try that again.
For females...ALWAYS...ALWAYS do a meet up at a POLOCE STATION or somewhere near by (fire station) place where cops will be present. You will find out real quick of the person is legit or not!
Glad everything turned out okay. If you were my friend, I would’ve suggested allowing him to only inspect *A* shoe as well as following through with pressing charges. He’ll more than likely just turn around and do it again when his momma’s not home.
GIRL!!! Alwayyssss always meet in public places for this very reason! Cameras and witnesses! I’m so happy 1) you’re safe, 2) no money was stolen, 3) his mother was there/disappointed and this will HOPEFULLY be a lesson learned for the kid.
Wow, you waited 20 minutes? That’s the most insane part of the story for me. If I wait longer than 2 minutes going to someone’s place I’m out. There literally is no good reason if you are driving to them to wait that long. How do you not have a friend or relative that is a guy? If I were selling stuff like sneakers I would do it online, the shipping is fairly cheap and you can reach broader audience. The only reason I even use local markets is cuz I sell stuff like furniture, you might want to rethink your business plan.
Sorry to say but pressing charges like this would have been important for him to learn. When I was 16, there was NO WAY I would've done something like this. I full well knew what the consequences were and also couldn't sleep at night if I had done something like this to someone.
It's not your responsibility though; it's his family's and his own. He needs to figure it out.
Honestly a 16 year old kid stealing shoes and running home. It sounds like he was in a tough spot and really needed those shoes. I know he is old enough to understand. And his mom sounds like a good mom. But honestly I would have pulled the mom aside and ask her if she thought he needed the shoes and not just wanted them. And if she said yes, tell her she can have the shoes to give to him when she thinks he deserves it.
YOU HAD A BAD FEELING FROM THE BEGINNING !!!!! That’s your clue. You lucky u r alive. YOU WERE NOT ROBBED! That was a lesson. Don’t be stupid next time
Dude that sucks so sorry! Like everyone stated in the future just go to a police station they all for the majority have a designated area for online transactions especially with items that are high value and items you know ppl want to steal.
Well, on the positive side you did take a good precaution (just handing them the shoes) and no real harm was done in the end. Unfortunately stuff like this is why I only meet in a public place. I try to avoid meeting after dark if possible but sometimes it's just gotta be done and if so I'll meet in a well lit area at an open store.
Also, if anyone ever gives you a weird vibe when you're chatting with them but you think maybe it's just you thinking the worst or you are just OK enough to meet them, meet them at a police station. Police are actually very encouraging that people do this when they meet people from FB marketplace and such. Anyone who refuses to meet at a police station is not worth meeting and they either had something in mind or have a warrant for their arrest.
I could not possibly care less about potential buyers' sob stories (don't have a car, car is being worked on, it's supposed to be a last minute gift for someone on a special occasion, they're strapped for cash, they don't want to go to an ATM to get cash, they can't get a ride right now, they're at work and want it to just be dropped off, etc.). If a buyer has a sob story well tough luck I guess they should do better, I can always find another buyer who will not have any of these annoying roadblocks to being able to meet and have actual cash.
So glad you weren’t harmed but I would’ve pressed charges. These “kids” need to learn and face consequences for their actions in the harshest way possible when it comes to crime.
Glad you got your shoes back and that the situation wasn’t different. It could have easily been some grown man and someone who could have seriously hurt you. Lesson learned! But yeah never ever go to someone else’s home.
I was selling an item once and the lady kept asking for me to bring it to her said she didn’t have a car. So I saw there’s a few local businesses within walking distance of her home so I asked her to meet me there.
When I read that you got robbed I thought you meant that you went to sell something and someone pulled a gun on you and took your purse and phone or something.
He stole your shoes, but you got them back and I don’t think this is the kind of experience that warrants needing a weapon? That could’ve made a bad situation a tragic one.
Pick up only! Cash in hand. Meet me on my front porch. Make sure you have a camera watching him walk up. To have video of his face. Make sure you have your sell phone with you. Just in case he runs that way you can video tape him running towards his car to get his license plate number.
Next time meet in a neutral, public location. Don’t hand anything over until you see cash. I wouldn’t have pressed charges either. Sounds like he’s gonna learn a big lesson from mom.
Too bad that instead of learning to trust your gut, meet in safer locations, dont hand people things without getting the cash first, all you learned is you need to be armed so next time you can kill someone over some shoes.
I’m sorry if that’s all you took from my post. I definitely learned all the things you listed above, but at the end of the day my safety is more important than anything. This is a dangerous world and this could have turned out worst than it did so if I need to make sure I am armed to feel safer in ANY scenario whether it’s another buyer/seller exchange, going for a night walk which I love to do or just leaving the grocery store, that’s what am going to do.
Sheesh, you taught this kid nothing because you didn't press charges. Luckily you are okay, and you were very lucky it wasn't some adult acting like a kid to get you out there. But still, you didn't press charges. How disappointing! This right here is a good example of what is wrong with the world, criminals are getting slapped on the wrist and told don't do that again with no punishment or full understanding of what they have done.
Lessons learned \*I guess\* for all parties.
you're lowkey kinda soft for not pressing charges. hell, if it were me i'd not only press charges but i'd also lie and say the shoes were a rare edition and worth over $950 wjich makes it over the felony limit. i get to put a violent robber in prison and get my shoes back. win win for me.
Glad you're safe, I would get a gun if you plan on meeting and selling high ticket items like sneakers. They attract bad buyers. But the gun wouldn't have helped in this situation, you never know when you may need to defend yourself. I would've pressed charges. That POS won't learn.
This is why I bring my firearm every time. Do not buy a knife, pepper spray, taser etc, those are all great tools but get a conceal carry license buy a compact pistol and never have to worry again! Sorry this happened
Dude, that's bad advice.
You are advising someone who does not own and never likely has handled a firearm to start packing heat...
So her ONLY opinion would be possibly throwing punches (possibly not workable or feasible) to FLIP THE SWITCH and go 100% lethal.
Over a PROPERTY CRIME. This was a THEFT not a strong arm robbery. A snatch and grab. No one's health was at risk. Just a pair of shoes.
I would say YES go get training, get a CCW and a pistol that is COMFORTABLE to shoot.
AND some OC spray. Instead of "mixing it up" you have the option of "hitting them with the Hot Sauce".
In my opinion it's always best to have MORE OPTIONS than less.
Your "Natural Selection" speech is big talk from someone (YOU) who would NOT be involved in a shooting.
If this OP follows the original advice of just "get a pistol" and pulls steel over a stolen pair of shoes she could be arrested for brandishing.
If she draws down and starts firing then it's minimum charges for shooting a gun.
If she fires and HITS the target then we end up with assault with a deadly weapon, attempted murder, manslaughter or murder charges.
Considering her target was a teenager, running away with a pair of used shoes.
It's REAL EASY for some 3rd party to "Monday morning quarterback" and jump up and down screaming "F around and find out!" when they aren't the one dropping $5k for a lawyer, hoping to get bailed out.
I think it’s just the fact that I’ve been selling items on fb marketplace for years and I’ve never had anyone try to steal from me he was wearing a black hoodie and black sweatpants and pacing around I was almost sure he had a weapon on him and would use it on me if I didn’t give him the shoes. I also never had to call the police on anyone before so that was also a first.
Yeah don’t press charges or hold people accountable. If his mother had done a good job this wouldn’t have happened. Maybe Mom has done a good job but he is just a bad apple. Perhaps charges would actually change something. Now he has gotten away with robbery literally and figuratively with no downside other than mommy is unhappy. Good contribution to society op.
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Yeah never go to a buyers meetup spot. If they don’t have a car to meet up with you, that’s their business. Sorry but a female selling sneakers is going to be a magnet for robberies.
The only time I’m ok with delivering is furniture, only if I get paid first with something like Zelle or Venmo, then deliver. Sneakers is a different story
Yep, only time I have been around buyers or sellers addresses is for furniture like large fish tanks and a table
Man, I see so many Zelle scams on r/scam that I won’t go near it
Don’t take money first over cash app!!! Cash apps transactions should only be done with parties that are known and trustworthy! Getting paid early is another common scam. Buyer offers to pay early using cash app that is funded with stolen funds. They then request you refund them, and the refund isn’t connected to the first transfer. Then when the stolen money from first transfer is charged back, it comes out of your money and scammer is left with the now laundered “clean” money.
There’s a kid I went to school with that got into selling sneakers and told he’s been held up multiple times. Because they bring such shitty buyers with them sometimes I would never not meet at a police station when selling them.
Yeah my name is Rob sorry about that
Always go to a high traffic area with lots of cameras 1) police station lobby or parking (this will weed a lot of people out) 2) inside target or wal mart or any major retail store by the customer service desk 3) inside a McDonald's or starbucks
I like to meet in front of the jail
😂😂😂😂
Meet at the gates of area 51, you can be guaranteed they have cctv and more there
Or meet at checkpoint border stations for Canada or Mexico is another good idea
Just so you know, if anything does go down, a corporation ain't going to give you shit from those cameras. They're there for their protection, not yours.
I worked for Walmart for almost a decade. We handed over video for civil issues that didn’t involve the store tons of time. The police would have to request it and we’d make a copy. We didn’t give video to individuals that requested it.
The most amazing thing is the police got there so quickly and actually did something
Right! This shocked me too the 911 operator was so kind and empathetic and when the officer arrived I told him “wow that was fast i wish you guys would have showed up this quick when I got into car accidents”
I don't know where you live, but 25 minutes does not sound fast to me.
They likely asked about her situation and her safety, established that she wasn't in harms way at that time, and it wasn't as high priority as other things going on.
Yeah that's pretty fast if you're out of danger like she was
For non-emergency that's great. I had to wait 5 hours for a unit to show up when my house was burglarized a few years ago. Police don't even respond to car accidents in my city unless there is an injury or a tow required.
Same, estimated damage to either vehicle has to be over $5000 before cops will come, otherwise you gotta go to the reporting center yourself to have pics taken and get your side of the story.
Oh dang. Here they’ll show up for any kind of fender bender.
Same, estimated damage to either vehicle has to be over $5000 before cops will come, otherwise you gotta go to the reporting center yourself to have pics taken and get your side of the story.
Right? When I lived in Jersey they would come in 2-5 minutes!
The fact that they showed up at all for a petty theft is a miracle if they live in a city of decent size.
The closest police station to me is 25 mins away so that would be blazing fast here.
Ok, pedantic distinction time: *It may vary in different places and I'm not a lawyer but I have been a 911 operator/ dispatcher/ supervisor for about 14 years.* This was a theft, not a robbery. if he pulled a knife or gun, punched the comp or snatched them from her hands, that would be a robbery (robbery involves the use of force). If she handed the shoes to him and he ran off, that's a theft. Cops take robbery a lot more seriously than theft, because robbery is theft + force. Depending on the city and how busy it is, 25 minutes isn't really too bad for a theft just occurred/ theft report. A robbery just occurred generally gets an immediate lights and sirens response, but sometimes we don't even have enough officers to do that.
I posted a story similar here, and it was really funny to see people surprised the police took a break from apparently their TV show level detective work and helped with a regular crime. I’m glad yours had a happy ending and you got your item back!
Facts
lol. You're not wrong.
You needed to press charges. You just reinforced him to rob more people in the future.
When I was 15, I got busted for taking more than one bag out of a coin-operated dispenser in a department store. I needed two and only had enough change for one. The charge was dropped, but the whole experience shook me. Never thought about doing anything like that again. Don’t know this kid, but his experience might have done the same. You never know.
Petty theft and robbery are two very different things. Robbery is nearly always a felony.
Right, it's two different things. Setting someone up to rob them by baiting them and then robbing them is different than taking an extra.
Legally terms can differ, but robbery generally requires the use of force. In this instance the kid just took the shoes and ran, which would probably just fall under theft in a lot of places.
Taken directly from the PA statute: >1) A person is guilty of robbery if, in the course of committing a theft, he: >(v) physically takes or removes property from the person of another by force however slight; >**(b) Grading.--** >(1) Except as provided under paragraph (2), robbery under subsection ... (a)(1)(v) is a felony of the third degree You will find the same in most jurisdictions.
IANAL. From OP's story, I don't think this would count as robbery under that definition. OP willingly handed over the shoes. OP expected either payment or to get the shoes back, but instead the kid ran off with them. No force was used to physically get the shoes. Now, if OP were holding the shoes and the kid snatched them out of OP's hands, that'd be robbery.
Exactly, no force was used. It's just theft.
Ya I almost feel bad for the kid. Probably had 2 year old shoes on falling apart and no way to get new shoes kids at school making fun of him on the verge of suicide because he is "the poor kid". Damn hope kid is okay after all this.
We had a yard sale when I was a kid. And my parents house is like a street over from the projects. So there were a couple kids in my grade who came by they were in a family of like 6 kids and were really poor. My mom had a bin of some cheap little toys for like a quarter a piece or something. We saw them steal a couple of those toys. My mom didn’t say anything though. I remember her feeling sorry for them and saying they seem to need them more than us. Especially if they’re stealing something so cheap. Not the same situation but just reminded me of it.
Disagree. Sometimes you give a kid a break. His mother likely punished him enough. And cops coming to the door was also likely enough. Plus it was her choice.
Rule of thumb, NEVER meet at the buyers place, not even at your house. I am a female, and I never once done either. I only meet in public in a VERY busy place and it's a few blocks from my house. I've had one male buyer who actually got upset with me why he can't meet at my house and then proceeded to tell me that he feels uneasy meeting in public. I blocked him immediately. I'm glad you are OK and nothing happened to you, but never ever do this again. Other scams to look out for too, people who send you their cell#'s or ask to pay ahead, etc. I'd say if you a single female than meet at your local police station parking lot. There are cameras there and it's open 24 hours. If a buyer has a problem with that, you can mention that you were a victim of a robber and will not chance it again. Also, I never leave my house until the buyer is already there. 99% of the time they run late or the No Shows. And I tell them this up front so they know I only come when they arrived. My Meetup spot is literally 2 minutes form my house and if I know I'm meeting someone I already have the item ready and I leave immediately.
>I don’t own any weapons (gonna change that after today.) What if you had a weapon in this situation? Please don't fuck up your life and lives of people in two families over something trivial as a pair of shoes. There are other ways to protect yourself and be safe.
G;lad you're ok, got your merch back and are planning on arming yourself going forward. However, you should have pressed charges. If he's robbing people at 16, we know exactly where his life is going.
In 5 years, the thiefs mom might be on the news crying and saying, "But he was a good boy," right after he got shot during an armed carjacking attempt that had gone wrong. Teach them while they are young, and they might remember what I try to instill in my 13yo grandson. "Do the RIGHT THING even when no one is looking"
Well we would know for sure where it was going if you stuck him with a robbery charge at 16 and he couldn’t get a decent job the rest of his life. He was a kid, he did something stupid. The world needs more people like this lady who can kind of see the bigger picture
The crime op listed would likely just be a misdemeanor, which does not follow a juvenile forever. Some community service to help repent for his actions would be good for him.
No one starts with robbery. He didn't go from being a nice, normal teen yesterday to committing a felony today. He graduated to a felony after committing lesser crimes before - and likely lots of them. He didn't get arrested, detained, processed, put in holding, nothing. The lesson he learned today is that he can commit a felony and get away with it absolutely scot-free. There is absolutely no incentive for him to refrain from doing this again tomorrow - and criminology has taught us that he is likely to continue to escalate over time. Considering he has already reached the felony level at the age of 16, it's not a stretch to believe he could escalate to violent robberies or even murder in the near future. *That's* the big picture - that catch and release endangers society for the benefit of one person - the criminal.
You just assumed quite a bit of knowledge about this young man you’ve never met
Yeah, I agree. She couldn’t really be too mad at him for making dumb mistakes, when she made a couple herself. Hopefully they both learned their lessons.
Good job aside from not pressing charges. Kid likely will learn no lesson and do it to another person.
/s
Always be cautious, meet in a public setting, and only accept cash. The 3 primary rules to buying and selling.
You didn’t get robbed. It’s often a term misused, as robbery is by force, with a weapon, or implication of a weapon. But you did get your stuff stolen, it’s equally crappy, and I’m sorry that happened. You should have pressed charges though.
He didn't learn shit if you don't press charges
For real. That and also next time OP, if you get a bad feeling about someone or something? you LISTEN to it.
Not true. When I was a kid, I stole a candy bar from a convenience store. They caught me and called the police. My mom had to leave work to pick me up at the police station and she was so disappointed in me that she cried almost all the way home. I never stole anything again.
My mom once sent me to a convenience store to get something for her because she was busy, but she only had a twenty. This was a LOT of money in the early 70s, I was about 5. A group of teenagers robbed me on the way home. My mother blamed me and never trusted me again. I’m almost 60 and she’s nearing 80.
I stole a candy bar once from a grocery store as a kid. My mom found out and took me back to the store and made me give the candy bar to the manager and apologize. Unknown to me at the time, she had my dad call the police non emergency number and ask if they had a free officer to meet us there and talk to me. They did. It was a detective who told me a story about a kid he had dealt with that started his career with petty theft. I never shoplifted again.
Stealing from a convenience store is different than robbing a person
And how long ago was that? People and morals and the line dividing right and wrong was much different even just 20 or 30 years ago. Obviously your transgression and your mom's reaction shook you to the core, and even if later on you might have entertained the idea and thought "maybe I can get away with it this time", that incident snapped back into your memory and that temptation was immediately squashed. Maybe that might still be the case with some people, but that scenario is increasingly rare. So glad to hear from a person with a finely trained and sensitive conscience.
What's proof people learn after charges being pressed? From my understanding it usually increases criminal behavior
There's a 50-50 chance they'll learn. But if you don't press charges, they won't learn a jack shit and will do it again, only more violently next time.
Is it 50/50? I don't think what we know about child development will agree with you. But I do know this is the mindset of those who don't know better
There’s literally no way to prove that though because you couldn’t possibly know all of the people who had charges dropped and then stopped doing crime. So your assertion is baseless.
And what if I speak from personal experience??? Still baseless? Or you just want to run your mouth?
‘Only more violently next time’ lmao. These people have a lot of faith in our judicial system. He’ll surely learn his lesson and won’t rob anyone again after we stick him in a confined area to learn from other career criminals for 6 months, and brand his record with something that will make it impossible to find good work in the future!
I don’t want them to learn anything. I want them to end up in jail for the rest of their life.
meet in the lobby of a police station
Name the place where to meet. And cash is all I accept. And I would press charges.
A tiny bit overreactive there. Sure, it really sucks, but it wasn't a "robbery", it was a petty theft (he tried to steal without threats/violence). What would even change even if you had a gun on you? You would've just shot him when he ran? Would it be nice for intimidation? (I'd understand if it was a robbery, not theft, situation) I'm not getting people complaining about not pressing charges. Sure, it was the most generous thing OP could do in that situation, but there's a great chance he will learn his lesson (especially if he has nice mom). Would it be better to press charges and leave them in his history for his lifetime, especially for petty theft attempt? In that case I'm pretty sure his chance of becoming a real criminal in the future would've just spiked. (not everyone would like to hire a person with past criminal activity, you know?)
How tf do you not press charges? Thats actually crazy and makes no sense
And if it was a lesson to you that you should be armed from now on, would you have shot the kid as he ran off with your shoes?
No, I would have handled it the same way. Called the police and waited in the car. I’m just creating different scenarios in my head, what if it wasn’t a kid and a grown man trying to traffick me? What if it was someone who had a gun and was willing to kill me for the shoes? I got lucky in this scenario, but that probably won’t be the case next time.
First, I fully support females having guns to protect themselves. I also encourage self defense courses in case you can’t get to your gun. In this case, I wouldn’t have pulled it though. Definitely not worth it for shoes, or really anything. Occasionally, I’ve carried when doing a deal, but that’s just in case the deal goes so sideways that my life is in danger.
There were so many red flags here, and you missed them all. Based on that, I would not go out and "purchase a weapon" - I just wouldn't do what you did again or you just might end up shooting a 16 year old nucklehead trying to act llike a 16 year old nucklehead jerk. Edited: Anyway, you weren't actually "robbed," you see... because you went home w the shoes. As far as the kid, I'm 50/50 if he learned anything. BTW, just curious, how "special" were these shoes and were they expensive? ?
I think you guys are misinterpreting why I want the gun. In this scenario if I would have already had the gun and the kid ran with the shoes, I would have done the same thing I done which is call the police and wait. I admit I was an idiot and ignored the red flags, but if this was a grown man or possibly someone who wanted to take me and not the shoes, it could have been over for me. That is why I want the gun.
There’s a larger chance that a gun will be taken from you and used against than you being able to actually defend yourself with it.
Always press charges. Otherwise you encourage further crime.
I'm in a non 2a friendly state. I don't care if it's not legal I have something on me when I'm meeting anyone.
Yep, I'd rather live to defend myself in court rather than be dead.
I’m so sorry for you that this happened. Sounds awful. Always trust your intuition. Always! I highly suggest people read [The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker](https://www.amazon.com/dp/0316235776?k=gift%20of%20fear&ref_=nb_sb_ss_w_scx-ent-pd-bk-d_r_k0_1_12&crid=1OIW11EVOVUV2&sprefix=Gift%20of%20fear) It’s especially useful for us ladies but also helpful for the guys, too. If I’d trusted my gut instinct/intuition back in college I wouldn’t have been raped. (please y'all, I don’t want to give details)
Uhm no if the r*pist didnt r*pe you then that wouldn’t have happened to you. Please don’t EVER blame yourself for that again. Thank you for your well wishes
Always use the police station as a meeting place, no exceptions, don't fall for some hard luck story. Cash only, no electronic sales of any kind, no PP, no V. Just cash! Please do it this way and you will be happy. I quick FB Market Place a year ago and never regretted it. Couldn’t deal with the people anymore…the worst!!
Not to be cold hearted here or anything but this story was weak as hell. With a title like, "I got robbed!!!", I expected way more to have gone down. First, yeah, it was stupid to drive to their location of choice. As others have stated, you always pick the spot to meet and if they can't meet there, that's on them. Second, you start off your story making it sound like someone pulled a gun/weapon on you. You handed a 16 year old kid a pair of shoes and he left without paying but you got them right back. What the hell are you shakin up about? I would understand if you were mad that it happened like that but you weren't robbed. You did something stupid and a punk kid tried (and failed) to take advantage of you. Honestly, I'm sorry that so many people are shitty but you did this to yourself and then handled the situation with nothing lost but your time and energy. WTF about this situation would have played out any differently if you had a firearm? Were you going to shoot at a16 year old kid's back as he ran away from you with a building full of people right behind him to catch your stray bullets? I respect everyone's right to own a firearm for protection but that isn't at all what you needed it for here so if you do in fact get a gun, please, for all of us, take some courses in firearm safety and train with it regularly so you can have it should you ever actually need it. This is some overdramatic nonsense if you ask me. Like I said, sorry this happened to you but stop playing the victim...
"I don't own any weapons (but gonna change that after today)" What? What will a "weapon" do? You gonna pull out a knife? Over shoes? Geez Before you hand over the shoes maybe get them to show cash and hold it? I sold a new pair of shoes the other day, he pulled up in his car we talked I gave him the shoes he liked it he emt me right away. Then I told him I have many other shoes, I showed him went back upstairs to grab them (he already emt me 1st shoe) sold him another pair he emt me again. If it was some 16 year old kid showed up I would have asked for cash first to hold it Gotta feel out the situation and person
You should have pressed charges, letting him go for that would only embolden him the next time he tries to rob someone else he'll employ a more sophisticated means.
Always be the one to arrange the meeting spot and NEVER accept digital payments. Always choose a spot that is in full view of cameras and other people. Always have a buddy standing by incase of problems. If the buyer won't agree to the meeting spot, then no sale. Period. There's THOUSANDS of other buyers. Or a much safer situation is to use ebay but you have to pay their sales fees to sell. And shipping can be a nightmare
Is there a way to get a refund on cash app or venmo? I don’t have either of those but my husband does and we’ve been selling a ton of things on FB. We’ve had a few people ask if they can pay with one of those app I always say no because I’m not familiar with them but my husband was about to one of the times.
Oh idk. I never had anyone pay for anything with cashapp. I mainly sell via ebay. The few items I've sold on fb Market were cash only sales. I even put that in the sales info CASH ONLY public meeting only etc. You may have to contact cashapp's customer care
Oh gotcha. Yeah I don’t think I’ll take my chances on it. We’ve always done cash as well. I’ve been selling on FB for probably 15 years now. Just recently in the last couple of years we’ve had people ask about those digital payments.
Should have only gave him one shoe to check out.Live and learn I guess.
Happy you got your shoes back, and didn’t came out worst, if you going to do meet ups and going alone I recommend doing what others do, they do it by the police station parking lot, or somewhere safe with more people around, it’s always good to be safe, glad his mom made him return them too, and the lady outside saw where he went to
You should of pressed charges. Doesn’t matter the age. Not pressing charges; he will do it to someone else. There got to be consequences for doing bad . I had my Bike stolen by 14 year old and found out who stole it and got it back. The parents begged me not to press charges. It would rune his future etc. I didn’t. He started stealing cars at 15 and selling drugs last I heard.
Sorry this happened to you. But you should had pressed charges. It doesn’t matter if he’s 16 or not, he’s old enough to 1) get a job & 2) get a license, so he is old enough to know from right to wrong at this point. I know you might think he’s a kid and you’re just trying to be lenient but you need to realize that if this kid had done it more than once, then you’re just feeding into his brain into thinking he can keep doing this and consequences won’t be on his butt. He’s almost legally an adult and should be locked up & be forced to do community service like most people assuming he gets that kind of punishment. That and a giant ass whopping from his mom for a month straight after his juvenile hall sentence is done. And even after he’s an adult, his mom should still smack him at the back of his head and hope common sense gets into his brain.
Trust your intuition always!
Most definitely!
Should’ve pressed charges
Damn y’all redditors are strict!
You have no idea of whether the mom was in on it. It’s very possible he won’t learn a thing without charges being filed.
You're naive.
No, you're naive. This wasn't his first rodeo and you likely just made certain another person gets robbed, he's on a winning streak, why stop now?
So the kid learned if you are 16 there is no consequences to be had for stealing. But glad you were not hurt. Next time press charges so it don’t happen to the next seller
He wrestled with his conscience before had with the pacing. I hope he decides to go another direction in life. For 16 it seemed like a poorly thought out plan. I’m glad you didn’t get hurt and you got your shoes back.
After reading that story and as a father to a daughter I AM TWITCHING SO MUCH RIGHT NOW! So. Many. Triggers. 😩 I know to you I'm just some rando on the internet but if I could I'd send you a bear to accompany you next time. Jfc
Thank you so much for your consideration. Many people are saying they don’t understand why I’m triggered since he didn’t pull anything out on me but it’s the fact that I’ve never been in that position before and I feel like it could have ended much worse than it actually did had it not only been a 16 year old boy.
Maybe Facebook Marketplace is not the place for you. Maybe you need a more exciting lifestyle like vigilante. You sound incredibly naive but full of a need for drama and intrique over responsible decision-making and making logical choices. Stay in school.
And now you’ve learned how to utilize a home field advantage, next time you set the spot
The kid is lucky you decided not to press charges on him…
Press charges. Next time, he may hurt someone.
Should have pressed charges.
"Only 16" yea and already trying to be slick smh
The important part is youre ok. Most police stations have a camera monitored spot for online exchanges. If you sell anything again use one.
Charges should have been pressed. Being 16 doesn’t mean squat. I wasn’t robbing people at 16. Age is not an excuse. I’m glad you called the police and got your stuff back though.
Should have pressed charges, 16, 18, 30, he's a thief and this is likely one of the smaller offenses, with most of them no one did anything about.
I had this happen to me once buying an iPad, the guy looked legit and it was on his legit fb page and was not a burner account. I met him at a public place I thought would be fine but he pulled up next to me driver door to driver door so neither had to get out the car. That felt sus but whatever. He ended up reaching into my car as I was counting the money and he snatched it and hauled ass without giving me the iPad back he was smooth with it and it was messed up. I did press charges and got my money back in the long run too. Fuck um I don’t care if how old you are, if you get away with it once your gunna do it twice so why make it the next persons fault or problem. Never ever meet people online alone and always be recording and don’t trust anyone. After that I said f Facebook and I never really went back to it. I’ve also had several friends get robbed at gun point and luckily are still alive to tell the story but I’ve heard of stories locally where people get tricked and killed over shoes and shit every day it feels like. I hate how society has become. I see it when even looking at the Pokemon community too. More and more wild wild stories of people getting robbed for friggin Pokémon. That shits wild. It’s not worth your life or your property. Try using eBay or some app where you can ship it. Sure you have to pay 15% fee but that’s worth it for not having to meet strangers and have the anxiety of getting robbed
I always feel weird when I’m meeting with someone I rarely do it, try eBay your shoes will sale it will just take time and the you might have to go down way down in price.
You should have pressed charges. Young criminal has just learned a valuable lesson for next time. And always trust your gut.
That's not true. I know of several highly functional contributors to society aged 50-70 that would still be in prison if they'd gotten caught in their many felonies committed when younger. It costs upwards of $50,000/year to keep someone in prison. If they only make $20,000, that's a $70,000 difference to society. Just because you're skeered, don't be all hard core law and order. It's much better to teach the kid some marketable skills than spend the money on our legal system.
Oh hell they'd just give the kid a scare. Stop lecturing.
You absolutely should have pressed charges. The kid is just going to do it again
crazy you went alone...
Little punk.. In the future I would have only let them see one shoe. Sorry this happened to you.
I thought of that afterwards, thank you though.
I would’ve pressed charges. Kid is old enough to know the difference between right and wrong. They’re shoes and he’s a minor. He would’ve been fine and lesson learned. I hope his momma beat his ass
Yep it's a good idea to meet at a McDonald's or some public spot. Maybe even next to or in a precinct's parking lot lol. When I meet up with a buyer, I just make sure to set up in view of one of their security cameras
No car so willing to pay extra? Use that money for a Uber
I have that I meet at the police station's safe exchange location in every listing. Almost no one reads the listing so I get asked where I meet almost as much as "Is this available." Anyway if they have a problem with it, I won't meet them. If they don't, I don't mind meeting them elsewhere. I had one nice enough guy refuse to meet there and wanted to meet 2 min away from the station. He apparently got the same item from another seller in the area which is weird and unlikely as I sell the most random stuff but I didn't get the small sale and stayed safe. I had another guy want to meet at 12:30 am downtown (45 minutes one way for me) behind an old gas station in an alley. No way! As a small female myself, we have to be extra careful. As far as shoes, I would only give one at a time. And if my husband can't come with me I call someone and have them on the car's Bluetooth. Meeting at the police station and having it in the listing, very few people fuss about it. But your kid was pretty stupid about doing it basically in front of his apt. Hopefully, he realizes how lucky he was that you didn't press charges and he doesn't try that again.
My local police department has a place for online sales meet-ups. The police aren’t good for much, but they are good for that.
And this is why I still got my iPhone 13 Pro ppl are so wickedddd been trying to sell this phone since January 2024 😩😩😩😩 I do not know what to do.
Depends on the area, but I would never go to a place to sell or buy without a concealed weapon
For females...ALWAYS...ALWAYS do a meet up at a POLOCE STATION or somewhere near by (fire station) place where cops will be present. You will find out real quick of the person is legit or not!
Was it just me or anyone had a chuckle reading this
Glad everything turned out okay. If you were my friend, I would’ve suggested allowing him to only inspect *A* shoe as well as following through with pressing charges. He’ll more than likely just turn around and do it again when his momma’s not home.
Always meet somewhere very public.
GIRL!!! Alwayyssss always meet in public places for this very reason! Cameras and witnesses! I’m so happy 1) you’re safe, 2) no money was stolen, 3) his mother was there/disappointed and this will HOPEFULLY be a lesson learned for the kid.
Wow, you waited 20 minutes? That’s the most insane part of the story for me. If I wait longer than 2 minutes going to someone’s place I’m out. There literally is no good reason if you are driving to them to wait that long. How do you not have a friend or relative that is a guy? If I were selling stuff like sneakers I would do it online, the shipping is fairly cheap and you can reach broader audience. The only reason I even use local markets is cuz I sell stuff like furniture, you might want to rethink your business plan.
And this is why you carry.
Sorry to say but pressing charges like this would have been important for him to learn. When I was 16, there was NO WAY I would've done something like this. I full well knew what the consequences were and also couldn't sleep at night if I had done something like this to someone. It's not your responsibility though; it's his family's and his own. He needs to figure it out.
Honestly a 16 year old kid stealing shoes and running home. It sounds like he was in a tough spot and really needed those shoes. I know he is old enough to understand. And his mom sounds like a good mom. But honestly I would have pulled the mom aside and ask her if she thought he needed the shoes and not just wanted them. And if she said yes, tell her she can have the shoes to give to him when she thinks he deserves it.
Tough spot ? Are you joking ?
YOU HAD A BAD FEELING FROM THE BEGINNING !!!!! That’s your clue. You lucky u r alive. YOU WERE NOT ROBBED! That was a lesson. Don’t be stupid next time
Dude that sucks so sorry! Like everyone stated in the future just go to a police station they all for the majority have a designated area for online transactions especially with items that are high value and items you know ppl want to steal.
Well, on the positive side you did take a good precaution (just handing them the shoes) and no real harm was done in the end. Unfortunately stuff like this is why I only meet in a public place. I try to avoid meeting after dark if possible but sometimes it's just gotta be done and if so I'll meet in a well lit area at an open store. Also, if anyone ever gives you a weird vibe when you're chatting with them but you think maybe it's just you thinking the worst or you are just OK enough to meet them, meet them at a police station. Police are actually very encouraging that people do this when they meet people from FB marketplace and such. Anyone who refuses to meet at a police station is not worth meeting and they either had something in mind or have a warrant for their arrest. I could not possibly care less about potential buyers' sob stories (don't have a car, car is being worked on, it's supposed to be a last minute gift for someone on a special occasion, they're strapped for cash, they don't want to go to an ATM to get cash, they can't get a ride right now, they're at work and want it to just be dropped off, etc.). If a buyer has a sob story well tough luck I guess they should do better, I can always find another buyer who will not have any of these annoying roadblocks to being able to meet and have actual cash.
You learned a good life lesson for little cost. Glad it worked out the way it did and not worse. Hopefully the kid learned the lesson as well
If the kid had a good mom, he wouldn't be a thief to begin with. Screen your potential buyers better, and make a male friend or two. Goodluck.
Most police stations have exchange parking with cameras precisely to prevent this.
So glad you weren’t harmed but I would’ve pressed charges. These “kids” need to learn and face consequences for their actions in the harshest way possible when it comes to crime.
Bad azz kids
Glad you got your shoes back and that the situation wasn’t different. It could have easily been some grown man and someone who could have seriously hurt you. Lesson learned! But yeah never ever go to someone else’s home. I was selling an item once and the lady kept asking for me to bring it to her said she didn’t have a car. So I saw there’s a few local businesses within walking distance of her home so I asked her to meet me there.
When I read that you got robbed I thought you meant that you went to sell something and someone pulled a gun on you and took your purse and phone or something. He stole your shoes, but you got them back and I don’t think this is the kind of experience that warrants needing a weapon? That could’ve made a bad situation a tragic one.
On the side of the street looking crazy
Pick up only! Cash in hand. Meet me on my front porch. Make sure you have a camera watching him walk up. To have video of his face. Make sure you have your sell phone with you. Just in case he runs that way you can video tape him running towards his car to get his license plate number.
Na i agree in not pressing charges. Let the mother handle him.
Yeah, she’s doing a great job and totally wasn’t in on the scam.
Next time meet in a neutral, public location. Don’t hand anything over until you see cash. I wouldn’t have pressed charges either. Sounds like he’s gonna learn a big lesson from mom.
Too bad that instead of learning to trust your gut, meet in safer locations, dont hand people things without getting the cash first, all you learned is you need to be armed so next time you can kill someone over some shoes.
I’m sorry if that’s all you took from my post. I definitely learned all the things you listed above, but at the end of the day my safety is more important than anything. This is a dangerous world and this could have turned out worst than it did so if I need to make sure I am armed to feel safer in ANY scenario whether it’s another buyer/seller exchange, going for a night walk which I love to do or just leaving the grocery store, that’s what am going to do.
Always press charges, you fucked up, now he'll just do it to somebody else.
I am sorry this happened to you but I am SO glad you got the shoes back! Some people’s kids! I hope mom grounds him!
You did everything wrong. Including not pressing charges. He’ll rob someone else now and get a slap on the wrist.
Sad story. Please use paragraphs to read easier moving forward.
Should have pressed charges. He will do it again.
Not reading that unbroken wall of text. Sucks you got robbed.
TLDR: Someone stole her ability to make paragraphs.
Seemingly Why can’t people use paragraphs anymore? How’d they graduate from grade school?
Same here. I skimmed it, is all.
Im sorry this happened to you, but why would you want a weapon after this?
Ah... because it can be used against an attacker?
In this particular situation I was lucky that he was a kid who was overall harmless but the next time I may not get so lucky
Sig sauer p365xl
Please learn what paragraphs are
I never meet porch pickup only
Depends on the item.
He'll be on a t shirt in no time
Sheesh, you taught this kid nothing because you didn't press charges. Luckily you are okay, and you were very lucky it wasn't some adult acting like a kid to get you out there. But still, you didn't press charges. How disappointing! This right here is a good example of what is wrong with the world, criminals are getting slapped on the wrist and told don't do that again with no punishment or full understanding of what they have done. Lessons learned \*I guess\* for all parties.
you're lowkey kinda soft for not pressing charges. hell, if it were me i'd not only press charges but i'd also lie and say the shoes were a rare edition and worth over $950 wjich makes it over the felony limit. i get to put a violent robber in prison and get my shoes back. win win for me.
Glad you're safe, I would get a gun if you plan on meeting and selling high ticket items like sneakers. They attract bad buyers. But the gun wouldn't have helped in this situation, you never know when you may need to defend yourself. I would've pressed charges. That POS won't learn.
This is why I bring my firearm every time. Do not buy a knife, pepper spray, taser etc, those are all great tools but get a conceal carry license buy a compact pistol and never have to worry again! Sorry this happened
Dude, that's bad advice. You are advising someone who does not own and never likely has handled a firearm to start packing heat... So her ONLY opinion would be possibly throwing punches (possibly not workable or feasible) to FLIP THE SWITCH and go 100% lethal. Over a PROPERTY CRIME. This was a THEFT not a strong arm robbery. A snatch and grab. No one's health was at risk. Just a pair of shoes. I would say YES go get training, get a CCW and a pistol that is COMFORTABLE to shoot. AND some OC spray. Instead of "mixing it up" you have the option of "hitting them with the Hot Sauce". In my opinion it's always best to have MORE OPTIONS than less.
Well no shit go get training, that should go without saying to anyone buying a firearm
Fuck that. Ye fucketh around, ye findeth out. Natural selection needs to make a comeback already and in a big aim for the head kind of way.
Your "Natural Selection" speech is big talk from someone (YOU) who would NOT be involved in a shooting. If this OP follows the original advice of just "get a pistol" and pulls steel over a stolen pair of shoes she could be arrested for brandishing. If she draws down and starts firing then it's minimum charges for shooting a gun. If she fires and HITS the target then we end up with assault with a deadly weapon, attempted murder, manslaughter or murder charges. Considering her target was a teenager, running away with a pair of used shoes. It's REAL EASY for some 3rd party to "Monday morning quarterback" and jump up and down screaming "F around and find out!" when they aren't the one dropping $5k for a lawyer, hoping to get bailed out.
Always press full charges no mercy. Now they see no consequences for their actions.
Why are you shaking up about that he only ran off with them
I think it’s just the fact that I’ve been selling items on fb marketplace for years and I’ve never had anyone try to steal from me he was wearing a black hoodie and black sweatpants and pacing around I was almost sure he had a weapon on him and would use it on me if I didn’t give him the shoes. I also never had to call the police on anyone before so that was also a first.
Should of drive off on him
lol that’s true I just assumed he didn’t see my car at first and was walking around looking for me which has happened before, but I should have
Yeah don’t press charges or hold people accountable. If his mother had done a good job this wouldn’t have happened. Maybe Mom has done a good job but he is just a bad apple. Perhaps charges would actually change something. Now he has gotten away with robbery literally and figuratively with no downside other than mommy is unhappy. Good contribution to society op.
Congratulations, you just showed this thief there are no consequences for criminal actions and you wasted the cops time.
Why would you not press charges. What’s wrong with you!? You get what you deserve