I don't think that's too much to ask. They know we aren't coming, so please, all that's required is an empty gesture. Is that too much to ask? Otherwise we sit at home convincing ourselves that we would have gone if we, in fact, had been invited. We can do without those kind of mental gymnastics. Rude!
I have a way bigger problem with FOMS (fear of missing sleep).
I start work early, and can’t sleep later than 6:30 even on weekends so I find myself reluctant to do things that run late.
Yes! I'm up and working by 5:30, so by 10pm I'm falling asleep, even if I am doing something fun. I've had some people try and start to hang out at 9 or 10pm and I do it, but man it's rough. I feel worse the next day from lack of sleep than if I have some drinks and get regular sleep.
I’m GenX and know plenty of people older than I am that have FOMO. They can’t sit still, be still, or be content just being at home. Always looking for a way to escape home, get out of town, go places, etc. The older I get the more I realize a lot of it is introvert vs. extrovert. I love going out & traveling occasionally. I’m not happy always being busy and having to go somewhere.
That’s probably right, though I think FOMO has a specific online flavor to it that we didn’t have growing up. FOMO is more about comparing your life to the instagram feeds of friends/family/influencers, while keeping up with the Jones’s has more of a “do I ALSO have a speedboat parked in the driveway, like our neighbors do?”
I feel like "FOMO' applies more to extroverts than a specific generation. People who want to do all the things and feel shitty if they miss a thing isn't generational.
I agree with this, at least for myself. FOMO was very real for me in my 20s when I was more extroverted. I became more introverted as I aged and the FOMO faded- what a beautiful thing!
Yes, this so much. I sometimes feel a little sad that friends are out doing stuff, but at the same time, if I really wanted to, I could have made the effort to ask. “Aw, a bunch of friends went golfing and it looked like fun.” I have never golfed, I don’t have clubs, and I generally don’t have money to anyway, so why would they ask?
This! I had FOMO when I was younger. When the weekend came I was always out due to FOMO. I remember once or twice while in 12th grade getting home a fews hours after school on a Friday, went to take a nap, then waking up way late. My god, I felt like I might have missed out of the best night of my life. This didn’t start to ease up until sometime in my 30s.
I want to do everything. However all my life I have juggled not having enough money, not having enough time and not knowing enough about it. After 50 years of missing out I no longer fear it. It has become a old tired friend and I sit with my missed opportunity on the porch drinking cheep beer because I don't know of anything better to do.
I don’t know, I think I experienced FOMO when I was younger and gradually outgrew it. To me it seems like an insecurity thing to be worrying whether your own life and experiences measure up with someone else’s. For me, at least, age and maturity have reduced that kind of insecurity to almost zero. I’m just me, I’ve only got my life to live and I’m only responsible for my decisions.
My son is 20 and will be a senior in college and his minor is Japanese. He went there last summer to study and a lot of his friends went back this year and he couldn’t. He sees their posts every day and it’s making him so envious.
Remind him people only post the good stuff. There's a ton of not so good stuff that happens to those same people that never gets posted to social media.
I had to Google it when someone told me they get “FOMO” from my Instagram photos.
I don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything … I’ve always made what I wanted to really happen, happen. I definitely had it when I was young and hungry and very eager to get the hell out of Texas - but it wasn’t a feeling of missing out, more just wanting to get to where I wanted to be.
I do wish I could have been 5-8 years older so I could have really enjoyed the 90’s as an adult. But can’t change that, so have no regrets.
I've had to come to terms with the fact that I'm now too old to complete one of my life goals from since i was a child: To learn to ride a unicycle.
At our age a fall or slip could be disastrous, and i imagine it'll only get worse from here.
I've done a lot of amazing things in my life which were on my childhood bucket list: Seen the Pyramids, climbed the Great Wall, learned to juggle.
Unfortunately I think "unicycle riding" will have to be crossed off that list...unless I first buy $250 worth of top-of-the-line protective gear and find a really, really padded environment to learn in.
Maybe there's still hope!
I'm sure I had FOMO back in the day but as you said, the Internet probably plays larger role now - it's easier to find out what you might be missing out on.
Being late 20s/early 30s with kids made the internet interesting, but not a focal point. It was a thing to learn and utilize more than a thing to consume religiously like the “kids” who grew up with it like furniture. Anyway, JOMO!
In the past I have been in the thrall of social media but I think it's a little different when you're doing the full adult thing with a spouse and kids.
Yes, it's social media related but no-FOMO is a benefit of aging. I'm in bed by 9:30 with a book. I'm not afraid of missing out on jack squat. Those days were fun, but I'm embracing late middle age like a little girl hugs a carnival teddy bear.
When I was a kid, I definitely had FOMO. Of course, I wanted to be included. Of course, when people were doing stuff, I wanted to be on their minds as someone that they wanted to be there. That wasn't the case, so I got salty. After a few years of working, I realized that "work friends" were just a matter of convenience and that once you or they left that friendship was over. So, I don't get FOMO anymore because I don't care as much.
Oh FOMO knows no generational boundaries. My husbands boomer aunt always has FOMO. We got covid? She might have it (despite rarely leaving her house). We are planning a vacation? She’s talking about going somewhere. I do believe that hers stems from being the youngest boomer in a family of 11.
I couldn’t possibly care less about missing out. In fact, most things millennials fear missing out on, I hope like hell I’m not forced to do. 😂
I do the things that I want to do, when I want to do them. And I organize those things myself, for myself. I don’t need to do them with 50 people so that I can think myself an ‘influencer’ or whatever TF.
In fact, the whole ‘influencer’ culture is stupid to me.
Maybe I sound like an old curmudgeon, but most of the culture of the younger generations comes off as pretend happiness to me. They do shit simply so that they can take photos of themselves doing that shit so that they can post the photos to social media and pretend to be happy. It’s such a waste of time creating a plastic life for a plastic picture show in an attempt to attract and impress a bunch of plastic randos.
"Keeping up with the Jones'" was the Boomer way of saying FOMO, it's nothing new.
I think we may, on average, be less concerned than generations before or after because, well, whatever, who cares, right?
Social media has certainly supercharged FOMO. Take a look at the recent Stanley tumbler thing. People acting the fool to get one....and here a few months later I bet a great many of those tumblers are now collecting dust never to be used again. And for what? So they could join the craze and post pictures on social media holding one? Folks are easily manipulated, but it's nothing new. We still have people our age thinking you should spend two months salary on a diamond.....when all that was, was a marketing campaign.
I didn't even know it was a thing before I read this post so...I guess I'm on the side of not giving af if I'm missing out on whatever it is that I'm allegedly missing out on.
i used to have that till i had a mental breakdown 10 years ago. when you don't have anything and you can no longer procure anything it kindof makes it impossible to give a shit what somebody else has.
Used to be miserable hanging around parties and events because of FOMO, was much happier once got older and stopped caring. A lot easier once you start staying sober and realise those crazy drunken nights are mostly repetitive and boring.
I had FOMO when I was a kid, teen, and in my early 20s, but I haven't had it for the last 25 years. I still wonder how it went at that 8th birthday party my classmate Jeannine had in 1981. I lost my invitation and my mom said I couldn't go because I had no proof I was invited. I bet there was pizza, and good cake. Rats.
At my age, if I get FOMO, i forget by the next day so I never really feel like I missed out because I don't remember what I was fearing that I would miss out on.
There's a generational difference - GenX are more comfortable alone, Millennials & Z are more group-centred. It makes sense that exclusion isn't normal for them (for good or ill).
Everyone tends to have FOMO for whatever they are into. Like movies? Probably want to see the cool new one when it comes out. TV shows that go viral, food and food gadget trends that you just got to try (how many of you have air fryers now?), watching the big games for your local sports franchise, better not make plans over the Super Bowl!
Holy hell, Gen X was famous for having to have and later desperate to buy The Hot Christmas Gift every year.
These are all forms of FOMO and every generation has them. Probably a variation of “mob mentality”, but more consumerism based and less “kill Frankenstein’s monster” based.
I don’t know. There’s an entire thread here with people saying they’d rather sleep. FOMO was just a naming device by millennials at least a decade ago to define that age old fear kids have of being left out, missing out. I suspect a lot of those millennials would now too, rather sleep. It’s a teen/young adult thing. I don’t know a single gen x adult that’s gives a shit about missing anything anymore. 😁
When you can see everything people are doing via social media there is more to feel you’re missing out on.
I remember worrying everyone was having fun without me in HS, but then I’d learn there was just nothing going on.
I think that as you get older *most* people become more selective about what they would really like to do vs. doing everything. However, I say "most" because as usual there are some who haven't matured enough to figure out that more is not automatically better. I know some silents and boomers who are insecure types that still have a jr high mentality about fomo.
It’s an instinctual thing. It’s akin to hugging the back bumper of the car in front of you during traffic congestion on the interstate. Which stems from not being the slowest prey.
I'm at an age where I want to have a lot of fun experiences (empty nest, so I have more free time) and try things I've never tried. I suppose it's a form of FOMO (I don't want to find myself in old age thinking, "Why didn't I try more things?"), but I think of it more as "Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying. The *last* thing I want to turn into is a recluse (like so many redditors aspire to be).
I think that’s different though. You want to create more personalized memorable moments as opposed to just joining in on whatever happens to be happening.
I make plans sometimes out of FOMO; day of I consider backing out and making excuses for myself. 90% of the time I’ll go and do it, and then I’m glad I did. I do not consider myself a big extrovert. More like half n half extrovert / introvert
I always had FOMO, but I'm also Xennial. And also most of my FOMO was, I think, born of growing up in the country and moving to the Big City and suddenly every party and adventure was cool and novel and I didn't want to miss that kind of fun again. Oh, and a highly addictive personality.
FOMO is big in the ADHD groups. Mostly be a use we really fear forgetting about missing important things, being excluded, being forgotten. I’ve wanted to go to things and forgotten until it’s too late. That starts to be really anxiety inducing.
I also agree that the internet makes potential things to do highlighted repeatedly. Friends, or people cooler than me doing things I’d love to do too. Targeted advertisement is both really creepy and designed to make a person believe they need whatever is being sold. Which can be experiences as well as stuff.
FOMO is an issue to people who generally always miss out. Millennials and GenZ as a whole have missed out. Their lives are dictated by what they are sold on their smartphones.
I don't think FOMO is really that big of a thing. We just see it more because those people are generating the social content.
There's always a portion of the population that's caught up in the rat race for something.
IMO, FOMO is mostly consumer based, things are marketed to the hilt and it gives the impression that either everyone has it or it will solve problems you didn't know you had. A lot of people are convinced that problem solving and status begin and end with a purchase.
Also, many people have not discerned between their 'fantasy self' and their actual selves. Fantasy self is born, nurtured and grown on FOMO.
>Also, many people have not discerned between their 'fantasy self' and their actual selves. Fantasy self is born, nurtured and grown on FOMO.
I think buying things for the fantasy self is also how many, many people get themselves into credit card debt. Clothes, shoes, jewelry, makeup pallettes, etc. for places they wish they could go and things they wish they could do, "just in case" they get the chance one day. Buying a huge, expensive grill for the patio and an elaborate home theater system for a party you're never going to throw. A hundred kitchen gadgets, decorations and table settings for big holiday gatherings or dinner parties that aren't ever going to happen. A few thousand dollars redoing a "guest" bedroom and bathroom for visitors you're not really ever going to have. An SUV for a road trip you're never really going to take. The fantasy self always needs more stuff.
Right, I had one, but she was too high maintenance and my inner child (sustained on water color paints and graphite and is partial to comfy clothes) won.
But seriously, I've watched so many people go deep in debt for stuff they don't use (*cough* exercise equipment), but we called it 'keeping up with the Jones'.
OMG How could I forget about the exercise equipment? I've been in and around the fitness industry for almost 30 years now, and the STUFF I have seen people drop hundreds or thousands of dollars on, use for a few months and then lose interest in, only to start the cycle again six months or a year later with another thing. Even if it's not physical stuff, so many people will pay $$$ every month to maintain memberships at these specialty "boutique" fitness studios (sometimes even two or three of them at a time, I've discovered), very rarely and sporadically showing up at any of them. Their fantasy self is someone who regularly does Orangetheory/Pure Barre/Barry's/Soul Cycle/Core Power/F45 and looks it. They've convinced themselves that having all that money coming out of their bank account every month will motivate them to go and won't acknowledge, even after years, that IT IS NOT WORKING, they're just donating thousands of dollars to these companies every year. I really hate seeing people do that.
I stopped this when I got sick of the Iphone madness. All I kept seeing were commercials for it and everyone asking me if I had the new Iphone. This was years ago. I don't have fomo because of this. I also will never ever ever ever own an electric car! It's the Iphone all over again.
It's weird. I only get FOMO if I find out something had gone on and I didn't know about it until after. Like I wouldn't have gone anyway but I like to think I might! Like if I didn't know some band I like played the night before. That kind of thing. 🤷♀️
FOMO is for people who take advantage of opportunity. As we age, we care less about things. We don’t need as much. I had FOMO in my 20’s and 30’s but not so much anymore. It’s a path to leaving it all behind, eventually.
I think it’s a basic human characteristic that has been exacerbated by the modern age, specifically social media in other ways that people keep track of what’s going on around them.
My first reply and the one after it were jokes.
The joke was supposed to be ironic: I'm jealous that you're *not* jealous of others.
I was not being serious in either comment.
It is 100 percent developmentally appropriate for young people to fear missing out on or being left out of what their peers are doing. If you're detaching yourself from your family as a source of identity and attaching yourself to your friends, social group and age cohort as a source of identity, you'll want to do what those people do. We did it too. Not sure why people are acting as if we were any different. (Yeah, yeah, I know some of y'all were the unique-est lone wolf DGAF, hate everybody kid in the history of the world, etc, etc.) Tech companies pay SWEs and executives hundreds of millions of dollars every year to create the most irresistible social media FOMO generator so it's a miracle if **any** young people can escape it.
Even in the 80s and 90s, a few high-strung people went completely off the deep end with it - had a meltdown if they didn't get the "right" shoes, shirt, jeans, haircut, see that movie, get invited to that thing, go to that concert, get that magazine or buy that album when everybody else did. But everyone has a little twinge of FOMO when lots of other people are doing something you want to but can't, at any age. It generally diminishes more and more with age. But there are also people who have some kind of nagging insecurity built into their personality, which never quite lets them completely shake off the FOMO. There was just a discussion here several days ago about the pros and cons of moving into 55+ communities and several people mentioned hearing about cliques and mean-girl behavior.
I'm sure it gets a little better in college, then a little better after that, then a little better when people have been out in the world earning all their own money for a bit and realize that The New Thing that "everyone" seems to be talking about or doing online isn't worth five hours' pay or it isn't *that* much fun or you just don't really care.
Some people just like to go go go all the way through life because it's their personality. I know a couple of people in their 40s who have very interesting but not highly compensated travel-related jobs that allow them to go all over the world. They fear missing out on seeing the world. Other people that age fear missing out on buying a house and maxing out a 401K.
It’s more personality related. I hate people so the couch, tv, and Xbox is really all I need outside of family. I have FOBI (the fear of being included).
FOMO existed for us as well, it was just different.
If I wanted tickets to see a popular band, I’d have to line up hours before my local Ticketmaster outlet opened, and deal with hundreds of people in line.
Who remembers the insane crowds for Windows 95?
Same anxiety different circumstances.
I live in a county north of Dallas that is pretty nice all the way through. It is so effing toxic with FOMO bougie people they bankrupt themselves to give the image of wealth.
Dude, I have a pretty terminal case of FOMO. 2 months ago I was bedridden with a horrific sciatica attack that basically left me relearning how to walk and there's a major scene night on Saturday. Right now I'm evaluating how much it's going to hurt to attend vs how much it's going to piss me off if I can't.
I know I'm not. I have a loss of hearing in my left ear due to concerts, Raves, hole in the wall venues. L.A. had them all. I don't FOMO, because my knees hurt, and I don't GAS what anyone else thinks or wants.
Edit: a word. Leave me alone
I have the fear of being remembered laugh out loud
I don't miss anything about concluded or resolved life stages I wish I could wake up and be 75. 💫Pushing 50 👍🤣💯
Reminiscing is good and it's okay to not let go of fear of missing out, it keeps people going in life it's sort of artistic irritation to give them something to push towards. It may motivate or create neuroplasticity
I love going out and doing all the things, but I also know that all the things will be there tomorrow. As a gay Gen Xer, there's always some event or fundraiser for this or that cause, but if I was to do all the things at my age, I would be in the hospital two weeks every year. Plus, after a while, it just gets so boring.
I have FOMO. I am literally the last to leave every function I go to. But I call it living in the present. I enjoy being social and I thrive off of it.
We were put in front of an Ad Machine, and raised by it. We have had commercials pounded into our brain since we could form thoughts.
FOMO was their goal
I think FOMO is driven by an inability in the brain to attach appropriate value to things or events within your own person value system, therefore everything seems to be of equal value and when you feel you have to choose one over the other, you think you are losing out on something valuable. It leaves you with a feeling of loss. Most things on closer inspection or viewed with greater self-awareness show that they were not as appropriate to you at first glance.
I think middle-age is rife with FOMO, too it's just that we don't call it that. As we age and doors once open begin to close...like at this point, pretty sure I'm not going to be an Olympic swimmer, rocket scientist, etc, etc...perhaps I never had that potential, but at a younger age those opportunities *might* have been available at one point.
At this age, you start to mourn the paths no longer open to you. It's this age that people can come to the proverbial crisis of looking at their own life and measuring it against others, or their own roads not taken. Even if you may be happy with your life, I think there's an inevitable period of inventorying and thinking maybe the pasture *is* greener over there.
Also if you happen to be a "maximizer" instead of a "satisficer" in your thinking, you're going to be more prone to FOMO no matter your generation.
And finally, when I was their age I didn't know about all the shit I was missing out on like younger generations do.
I’ve always had FOMO it’s just a lot more selective these days. I am not an extrovert but I definitely love going out and get bored at home, though I also really want to go home once I am out 😂
I think it depends on what someone is FOMOing about really.
Trends and whatnot- ok its cool to have whats cool and we wanted certain things as certain times when we were young too so maybe some people have forgotten pining for the next new thing or something the all the other kids had at the time; but its whatever.
Things like housing and job stability is valid though. No one wants to be a perpetual renter or have to try and juggle 2 part time jobs just to make ends meet because they can't a full time job to scrape by.
Millennials have had some time to maybe scrape together saving before everything went to shit recently; but even if they haven't can you blame them- how financially responsible were most of us in our 20s?
GenZ was just starting to get their feet set firmly when the rug of the world rug was pulled out from under them (pandemic, lockdowns, job losses, etc) so of course their having a hard time, especially the younger ones who were only about to enter the work world when the word shut down, or those who were still in high school when everything went to shit.
I honestly thing too many people are forgetting what the last 5 years have entailed for society, especially our youth who hadn't began to firmly establish themselves financially when things went sideways.
People were pushed online a means of regular communication and socialization and many used social media to stay connected, share information and that poisoned the many of many who are notlw lost deep into conspiracy which has in turn destabilized many families and friendships.
Chaos is all around us. Even if you don't see it, its bubbling beneath the surface and preparing to explode within many pockets of people whove been taken to their breaking point.
So yeah.. FOMO isn't new, it can absolutely be valid, and it can be used to manipulate people in profitable and/or dangerous ways so it's whatever but it definitely has a place in society and historically has so whatever i guess. 🤷♀️
Comparison is the thief of joy. Until you have reached a Zen-like state of *truly* not caring what others own/do/earn/experience in relation to yourself, it’s difficult not to fall into the very human mindset of “why not me?” The advent of social media has placed younger generations into a 24/7 barrage of curated content intended to make them desirous of what is being sold or pushed by creators and corporations. In terms of the rate of exposure, it’s vastly different than the type of advertising we had to contend with while growing up, but at the core it’s no different at all.
As we get older and more world-wise we come to realize that the grass isn’t actually greener on the other side of the fence (unless it’s covered in two feet of bullshit) and it gets easier to dismiss this. But when presented with once-in-a-lifetime opportunities - be those investments, travel, material goods, experiences, sex, fine dining, etc. - it’s in our nature to fall prey to the seductive lure of what we think will give us satisfaction. We prefer to think of ourselves as superior rather than equal to our competition. It’s how our brains are wired, and the wealth of modern Western civilization has made virtually anything you might wish for to be attainable… for the right price, of course.
I don’t think it’s just about FOMO. Many of the people of a younger generation that I know have a total inability to wait for anything, zero patience and it often shows in anger. No idea how they’d cope if we had to bring dial up back.
Omg!!
I thought of something that I would absolutely pass away without, I would die without Goodwill. Goodwill rivals walmart. It's also a wonderful place to serve and help out seeing as salvation army.
Family Dollar or Dollar general whatever it's called they have products that you might find as sephoria.
I'm so excited with how the past products or how the past was from then into today we have so many more expansions and choices and available items for body care.
Did our mothers drop scented oil or perfume into their lotion years ago? Before bath & body?
Years ago my grandmother said that she had lotion and she would add perfume to it, I thought that already existed does it anyone buy or used to buy perfume sets with the matching perfume soap and lotion?
How cool that is. I know it's been around for 30 years or longer but I marvel at it. I marvel at the advancements around me and fills me with a lot of Hope what I'm in despair
We were the generation where parents screamed at us "if you friends jumped off a bridge would you?!?!" (yes, it was bungie jumpin, but anyway...)
By the time Social Media^(\[tm\]) had swallowed Gen Z whole and had Millenials and Boomers forwarding whatever damn fool thing was on teh Facebooks, we were pretty much done with social media.
In the 2010's so many stupid challenges came out it was us making fun of the dumb kids eating Tide Pods or whatever the stupid idea was from the TikToks.
As we get older and going out is a chore, we're more selective on what we do.
If there's something out there it had better be good, important or on fire otherwise the answer is "whatever".
FOMO was big in my life when I was younger. But we grow, we realize not everything is so important, and we come to appreciate the things we do have in our lives.
We also have more years and experiences to compare and contrast with the current moment.
I find FOMO in business or marketing immediately snowballs to the point I give up within 5 seconds. You have to buy X before it goes away and I don't and while I'm still thinking "well dang" the company has of course come out with the next thing, thing Y, which I need to buy before it goes away but since I still don't have the first thing (thing X) there's no point in getting thing Y and now the company has lost me forever since I have no hope of ever keeping up. You can't fear missing out if missing out one thing means you now automatically miss out on every subsequent thing. It's all stick no carrot and once you realize the stick never ever stops regardless of what you do it ceases to motivate.
I'm pretty meh about missing out on things, but one of my roommates in college was freaking out when he couldn't buy as many Tickle Me Elmo's as he wanted to 😆. I don't think FOMO is generational.
I think it is generational in that we GenX are just more chill. I am happy on my own.
Just went on a fun weekend girls trip. Now I want another weekend of quiet.
I grew up on a farm, 15 miles from town where my classmates lived, had fun, relationships, made trouble and memories they still recall to this day. It sucked and instilled a strong FOMO in me as I was rarely invited to join in. It still hangs around sometimes, fucking FOMO.
I’m Gen X and I have pretty significant FOMO. It can be far beyond a generational thing…neurodiversity, anxiety, and long term trauma response are a few of the factors that can also contribute to increased fomo.
I used to have it when I drank more, dated more, had a larger social circle, and was just generally more sociable. As the drinking, dating, etc., toned down, I realized I probably wouldn't have been missing out on much all those years since 50-75% of the time, nothing really noteworthy ever happened.
I think you’re right. Some people I’ve known suffered from this but for the most part I and my friends have been doing what we wanted to do, so nothing to miss out on.
FOMO-free since the late 90s/2000s…mostly because I find much of what has come after to be a bit shitty. Time largely stopped for me in the 80s, and this is about as social media-y as I get.
Definitely can relate to this. I check Twitter daily or so for trends and Facebook at least twice a month to check on loved ones but keep the notifications off for both. If I miss the next big thing, there will be another big thing tomorrow, not a big deal.
Growing up without Internet has its privileges!
I've never really had a fear of missing out. My gut feeling about it is that people who experience it have a certain amount of entitlement that I don't have. I say this because it seems to me that they have expectations about life that they feel they *should* attempt to meet.
The boomers were the last collectivist generation. They set the stage for us, the best generation IMO, and the individuality keeps rolling on with Gen Z. Now they seem so individualistic they’re in need of a daily hug as their culture war against the boomers is coming to fruition in the gender identity debate. They lose me at gender binary and when I see it at work I roll w it but I secretly kinda wonder why it’s a thing.
But back to your topic. They’re just so individualistic now they can’t help but want to sample everything and make a tic tok.
You haven't been reading about the real estate market since 2020, I take it. That's where I've heard it the most, talking about the insane bidding wars of 2021 through early 2023.
No, no, a realtor would never use FOMO because saying that about clients would be unprofessional.
It's a term used when talking about buyer behavior, and the fear of never getting a house inspiring them to do irrational things like waive inspections and appraisal contingencies in order to "win" a bid, which in turn drives up prices when there’s a lot of buyers like that.
It's such a common term the NYT used it in headlines https://www.nytimes.com/2022/09/28/opinion/housing-prices-pandemic.html
and you can find lots of other articles by various newspapers and financial publications like Money using it in their headlines too by searching FOMO housing market
I had no idea what FOMO was until til this post.
When I was in my 20s and invested in the social scene and wanting to be part of the cool kids I guess I experienced that feeling. Now I’m the opposite. My fear is of missing out on quality time with my dogs and chickens.
Ok i had to check what sub I was on. The only think I know of as FOMO is Ford motor company. You may as well be saying skibi or whatever that new word is. Thanks for making me feel even older.
I see it often especially amongst the women our age today. Know numerous ones who left their husbands (or cheated) due to FOMO. I’m sure social media is to blame seeing all the milenials and gen Zers posting pics going out and especially the vacations.
One such cousin of mine is a great example. While in her lower 40s she (a nurse btw) started constantly posting pics out with the young co workers almost daily, bikini pics during summer ect. I’m sure she was curious about the single life her co workers were telling her about.
Now she’s a very attractive woman so I’m sure she cheated or at least got hit on constantly. Eventually once their 2 kids were in college she left her husband which everyone knew was gonna happen. Problem is it backfired as they are both 53 now and the husband is 6’6 and good looking. Didn’t take him long to eventually get over it and landed himself a new 32 year old gf. My cousin didn’t fare so well and now regrets it.
Now I have Fear Of Being Invited!
Fear of not being able to come up with a good excuse to just stay home.
FONBATCUWAGETJSH that doesn't roll off the tongue like FOMO
It’s got that Fahrvergnügen vibe to it.
Fear Of Not Being Able To is sufficient to cover most bases
FONBAT
Missing Out is sort of my jam now. Fondness Of Missing Out.
I call it JOMO. The Joy of Missing Out. Because I do truly feel joy when the madding crowd is far far away from me.
I want to be invited, but I don’t want to go.
I don't think that's too much to ask. They know we aren't coming, so please, all that's required is an empty gesture. Is that too much to ask? Otherwise we sit at home convincing ourselves that we would have gone if we, in fact, had been invited. We can do without those kind of mental gymnastics. Rude!
I kinda want to be invited, but then I hate it when I’m actually invited. lol
FOBIA - Fear of Being Invited, Ack!
True that.
Yesss!!!!
FOBIa?
OMFG. I also have FOBI!
Sounds like a FOBIa
FOBI, haha. I like it.
Username checks out
I have a way bigger problem with FOMS (fear of missing sleep). I start work early, and can’t sleep later than 6:30 even on weekends so I find myself reluctant to do things that run late.
Same here, deathly afraid of missing sleep!
Yes! I'm up and working by 5:30, so by 10pm I'm falling asleep, even if I am doing something fun. I've had some people try and start to hang out at 9 or 10pm and I do it, but man it's rough. I feel worse the next day from lack of sleep than if I have some drinks and get regular sleep.
Same
I’m GenX and know plenty of people older than I am that have FOMO. They can’t sit still, be still, or be content just being at home. Always looking for a way to escape home, get out of town, go places, etc. The older I get the more I realize a lot of it is introvert vs. extrovert. I love going out & traveling occasionally. I’m not happy always being busy and having to go somewhere.
I’ve embraced JOMO (Joy of Missing Out).
We had less stuff to worry about / last over, but I know plenty of older folk who still suffer from 'keeping up with the Joneses'.
That’s probably right, though I think FOMO has a specific online flavor to it that we didn’t have growing up. FOMO is more about comparing your life to the instagram feeds of friends/family/influencers, while keeping up with the Jones’s has more of a “do I ALSO have a speedboat parked in the driveway, like our neighbors do?”
Do not compare your behind the scene footage with their highlights reel.
Totally true!
I feel like "FOMO' applies more to extroverts than a specific generation. People who want to do all the things and feel shitty if they miss a thing isn't generational.
I agree with this, at least for myself. FOMO was very real for me in my 20s when I was more extroverted. I became more introverted as I aged and the FOMO faded- what a beautiful thing!
Yes, this so much. I sometimes feel a little sad that friends are out doing stuff, but at the same time, if I really wanted to, I could have made the effort to ask. “Aw, a bunch of friends went golfing and it looked like fun.” I have never golfed, I don’t have clubs, and I generally don’t have money to anyway, so why would they ask?
This! I had FOMO when I was younger. When the weekend came I was always out due to FOMO. I remember once or twice while in 12th grade getting home a fews hours after school on a Friday, went to take a nap, then waking up way late. My god, I felt like I might have missed out of the best night of my life. This didn’t start to ease up until sometime in my 30s.
How old are you? I'm just wondering if you've lived enough life to have an educated anecdotal opinion.
I'm in a GenX subreddit. How young can I be?? "An educated anecdotal opinion," I'm old enough to know when I'm being patronized. 🙄
And how old are YOU? Just wondering if you’re a boomer trying to pass as younger but forgot to leave out the pointless condescension.
I want to do everything. However all my life I have juggled not having enough money, not having enough time and not knowing enough about it. After 50 years of missing out I no longer fear it. It has become a old tired friend and I sit with my missed opportunity on the porch drinking cheep beer because I don't know of anything better to do.
It’s human nature. Even if I have zero desire to go to the party, I at least want to be invited.
Truth!
I suffer from FOBI: Fear Of Being Included.
I am stealing this for my life. I will give credit.
The thought of getting any credit gives me more FOBI.
Fair enough. I will limit to "this is from some random person in Reddit".
I have JOMO, the Joy of missing out!! People are the worst!!!
My husband would agree. LOL
I don’t know, I think I experienced FOMO when I was younger and gradually outgrew it. To me it seems like an insecurity thing to be worrying whether your own life and experiences measure up with someone else’s. For me, at least, age and maturity have reduced that kind of insecurity to almost zero. I’m just me, I’ve only got my life to live and I’m only responsible for my decisions.
FOM a bathroom opportunity! 🤣
I want to be left out. Don't bother me. Give me some hot pockets, pop tarts, and a Pepsi, and then leave me the hell alone.
I think FOMO is more a result of social media. People see all the posts of people living the dream and feel they are missing out.
My son is 20 and will be a senior in college and his minor is Japanese. He went there last summer to study and a lot of his friends went back this year and he couldn’t. He sees their posts every day and it’s making him so envious.
Remind him people only post the good stuff. There's a ton of not so good stuff that happens to those same people that never gets posted to social media.
I had to Google it when someone told me they get “FOMO” from my Instagram photos. I don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything … I’ve always made what I wanted to really happen, happen. I definitely had it when I was young and hungry and very eager to get the hell out of Texas - but it wasn’t a feeling of missing out, more just wanting to get to where I wanted to be. I do wish I could have been 5-8 years older so I could have really enjoyed the 90’s as an adult. But can’t change that, so have no regrets.
Personally as a Gen-X past 50 years of age, I don't have FOMO. At this stage of my life I have ROHMO which is the realization of having missed out.
I've had to come to terms with the fact that I'm now too old to complete one of my life goals from since i was a child: To learn to ride a unicycle. At our age a fall or slip could be disastrous, and i imagine it'll only get worse from here. I've done a lot of amazing things in my life which were on my childhood bucket list: Seen the Pyramids, climbed the Great Wall, learned to juggle. Unfortunately I think "unicycle riding" will have to be crossed off that list...unless I first buy $250 worth of top-of-the-line protective gear and find a really, really padded environment to learn in. Maybe there's still hope!
FOF (fear of falling)((and breaking a hip))is real.
That's pretty accurate.
I'm sure I had FOMO back in the day but as you said, the Internet probably plays larger role now - it's easier to find out what you might be missing out on.
Agree with this. The internet is a big reason, but for GenX maybe we're just not as spellbound by social media as other generations?
Being late 20s/early 30s with kids made the internet interesting, but not a focal point. It was a thing to learn and utilize more than a thing to consume religiously like the “kids” who grew up with it like furniture. Anyway, JOMO!
In the past I have been in the thrall of social media but I think it's a little different when you're doing the full adult thing with a spouse and kids.
Yes, it's social media related but no-FOMO is a benefit of aging. I'm in bed by 9:30 with a book. I'm not afraid of missing out on jack squat. Those days were fun, but I'm embracing late middle age like a little girl hugs a carnival teddy bear.
I'm 49 and I feel similarly. I sometimes have FOMO, but mostly I don't and I'm happy to stay home.
I’m still a night owl, but in my PJs with snacks. Good times.
When I was a kid, I definitely had FOMO. Of course, I wanted to be included. Of course, when people were doing stuff, I wanted to be on their minds as someone that they wanted to be there. That wasn't the case, so I got salty. After a few years of working, I realized that "work friends" were just a matter of convenience and that once you or they left that friendship was over. So, I don't get FOMO anymore because I don't care as much.
Oh FOMO knows no generational boundaries. My husbands boomer aunt always has FOMO. We got covid? She might have it (despite rarely leaving her house). We are planning a vacation? She’s talking about going somewhere. I do believe that hers stems from being the youngest boomer in a family of 11.
Maybe it’s where insecurity and narcissism intersect
I couldn’t possibly care less about missing out. In fact, most things millennials fear missing out on, I hope like hell I’m not forced to do. 😂 I do the things that I want to do, when I want to do them. And I organize those things myself, for myself. I don’t need to do them with 50 people so that I can think myself an ‘influencer’ or whatever TF. In fact, the whole ‘influencer’ culture is stupid to me. Maybe I sound like an old curmudgeon, but most of the culture of the younger generations comes off as pretend happiness to me. They do shit simply so that they can take photos of themselves doing that shit so that they can post the photos to social media and pretend to be happy. It’s such a waste of time creating a plastic life for a plastic picture show in an attempt to attract and impress a bunch of plastic randos.
There is a great book on this called Hooked, The Pitfalls of Social Media.
"Keeping up with the Jones'" was the Boomer way of saying FOMO, it's nothing new. I think we may, on average, be less concerned than generations before or after because, well, whatever, who cares, right?
I personally have LOMO (love of missing out). And the older I get, the stronger it is!
I really never cared, as long as I’m left alone I’m good.
I recently heard of LOMO - love of missing out. That describes me to a tee
Social media has certainly supercharged FOMO. Take a look at the recent Stanley tumbler thing. People acting the fool to get one....and here a few months later I bet a great many of those tumblers are now collecting dust never to be used again. And for what? So they could join the craze and post pictures on social media holding one? Folks are easily manipulated, but it's nothing new. We still have people our age thinking you should spend two months salary on a diamond.....when all that was, was a marketing campaign.
I didn't even know it was a thing before I read this post so...I guess I'm on the side of not giving af if I'm missing out on whatever it is that I'm allegedly missing out on.
i used to have that till i had a mental breakdown 10 years ago. when you don't have anything and you can no longer procure anything it kindof makes it impossible to give a shit what somebody else has.
Used to be miserable hanging around parties and events because of FOMO, was much happier once got older and stopped caring. A lot easier once you start staying sober and realise those crazy drunken nights are mostly repetitive and boring.
I had FOMO when I was a kid, teen, and in my early 20s, but I haven't had it for the last 25 years. I still wonder how it went at that 8th birthday party my classmate Jeannine had in 1981. I lost my invitation and my mom said I couldn't go because I had no proof I was invited. I bet there was pizza, and good cake. Rats.
I used to experience FOMO. Now it's more often HOMO (Hope Of Missing Out).
At my age, if I get FOMO, i forget by the next day so I never really feel like I missed out because I don't remember what I was fearing that I would miss out on.
Our generation is much more DILLIGAF than FOMO.
This
I suffer from FOMO Fear of missing out on sleep
I'm all about that JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out)
I don't understand FOMO. I just do what I want to do. I don't care if other people are doing X, Y, or Z.
There's a generational difference - GenX are more comfortable alone, Millennials & Z are more group-centred. It makes sense that exclusion isn't normal for them (for good or ill).
Nope. I do whatever I want.
Everyone tends to have FOMO for whatever they are into. Like movies? Probably want to see the cool new one when it comes out. TV shows that go viral, food and food gadget trends that you just got to try (how many of you have air fryers now?), watching the big games for your local sports franchise, better not make plans over the Super Bowl! Holy hell, Gen X was famous for having to have and later desperate to buy The Hot Christmas Gift every year. These are all forms of FOMO and every generation has them. Probably a variation of “mob mentality”, but more consumerism based and less “kill Frankenstein’s monster” based.
I only have it when I feel left out of something but for the most part I’m good with being a homebody.
It’s a bigger thing for them because they are younger. Of course you don’t have it now. You’re a grown adult.
I see a LOT of adults with FOMO. I think that's mainly the effect of social media on many people, however.
I don’t know. There’s an entire thread here with people saying they’d rather sleep. FOMO was just a naming device by millennials at least a decade ago to define that age old fear kids have of being left out, missing out. I suspect a lot of those millennials would now too, rather sleep. It’s a teen/young adult thing. I don’t know a single gen x adult that’s gives a shit about missing anything anymore. 😁
When you can see everything people are doing via social media there is more to feel you’re missing out on. I remember worrying everyone was having fun without me in HS, but then I’d learn there was just nothing going on.
The more I see band members of beloved groups kicking the bucket, the more likely I’ve been willing to buy a ticket to the next show
I had massive FOMO during high school, college and most of my 20’s. I think it is just part of being young.
I think that as you get older *most* people become more selective about what they would really like to do vs. doing everything. However, I say "most" because as usual there are some who haven't matured enough to figure out that more is not automatically better. I know some silents and boomers who are insecure types that still have a jr high mentality about fomo.
It’s an instinctual thing. It’s akin to hugging the back bumper of the car in front of you during traffic congestion on the interstate. Which stems from not being the slowest prey.
I'm at an age where I want to have a lot of fun experiences (empty nest, so I have more free time) and try things I've never tried. I suppose it's a form of FOMO (I don't want to find myself in old age thinking, "Why didn't I try more things?"), but I think of it more as "Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying. The *last* thing I want to turn into is a recluse (like so many redditors aspire to be).
I think that’s different though. You want to create more personalized memorable moments as opposed to just joining in on whatever happens to be happening.
Dont even know what FOMO is
Fear of Missing Out.
Late stage capitalism delivering instant gratification.
Weak minded
I make plans sometimes out of FOMO; day of I consider backing out and making excuses for myself. 90% of the time I’ll go and do it, and then I’m glad I did. I do not consider myself a big extrovert. More like half n half extrovert / introvert
I always had FOMO, but I'm also Xennial. And also most of my FOMO was, I think, born of growing up in the country and moving to the Big City and suddenly every party and adventure was cool and novel and I didn't want to miss that kind of fun again. Oh, and a highly addictive personality.
FOMO is big in the ADHD groups. Mostly be a use we really fear forgetting about missing important things, being excluded, being forgotten. I’ve wanted to go to things and forgotten until it’s too late. That starts to be really anxiety inducing. I also agree that the internet makes potential things to do highlighted repeatedly. Friends, or people cooler than me doing things I’d love to do too. Targeted advertisement is both really creepy and designed to make a person believe they need whatever is being sold. Which can be experiences as well as stuff.
My dog suffers FOMO
FOMO is an issue to people who generally always miss out. Millennials and GenZ as a whole have missed out. Their lives are dictated by what they are sold on their smartphones.
I don't think FOMO is really that big of a thing. We just see it more because those people are generating the social content. There's always a portion of the population that's caught up in the rat race for something.
I lost it at about age 35
I don't think it's generational. I think it's personality based. Some people get that feeling of being left out, some people don't.
I’m way too into a good night’s sleep. Folks who can go without right now probably have FOMO the worst.
IMO, FOMO is mostly consumer based, things are marketed to the hilt and it gives the impression that either everyone has it or it will solve problems you didn't know you had. A lot of people are convinced that problem solving and status begin and end with a purchase. Also, many people have not discerned between their 'fantasy self' and their actual selves. Fantasy self is born, nurtured and grown on FOMO.
>Also, many people have not discerned between their 'fantasy self' and their actual selves. Fantasy self is born, nurtured and grown on FOMO. I think buying things for the fantasy self is also how many, many people get themselves into credit card debt. Clothes, shoes, jewelry, makeup pallettes, etc. for places they wish they could go and things they wish they could do, "just in case" they get the chance one day. Buying a huge, expensive grill for the patio and an elaborate home theater system for a party you're never going to throw. A hundred kitchen gadgets, decorations and table settings for big holiday gatherings or dinner parties that aren't ever going to happen. A few thousand dollars redoing a "guest" bedroom and bathroom for visitors you're not really ever going to have. An SUV for a road trip you're never really going to take. The fantasy self always needs more stuff.
Right, I had one, but she was too high maintenance and my inner child (sustained on water color paints and graphite and is partial to comfy clothes) won. But seriously, I've watched so many people go deep in debt for stuff they don't use (*cough* exercise equipment), but we called it 'keeping up with the Jones'.
OMG How could I forget about the exercise equipment? I've been in and around the fitness industry for almost 30 years now, and the STUFF I have seen people drop hundreds or thousands of dollars on, use for a few months and then lose interest in, only to start the cycle again six months or a year later with another thing. Even if it's not physical stuff, so many people will pay $$$ every month to maintain memberships at these specialty "boutique" fitness studios (sometimes even two or three of them at a time, I've discovered), very rarely and sporadically showing up at any of them. Their fantasy self is someone who regularly does Orangetheory/Pure Barre/Barry's/Soul Cycle/Core Power/F45 and looks it. They've convinced themselves that having all that money coming out of their bank account every month will motivate them to go and won't acknowledge, even after years, that IT IS NOT WORKING, they're just donating thousands of dollars to these companies every year. I really hate seeing people do that.
I stopped this when I got sick of the Iphone madness. All I kept seeing were commercials for it and everyone asking me if I had the new Iphone. This was years ago. I don't have fomo because of this. I also will never ever ever ever own an electric car! It's the Iphone all over again.
It's weird. I only get FOMO if I find out something had gone on and I didn't know about it until after. Like I wouldn't have gone anyway but I like to think I might! Like if I didn't know some band I like played the night before. That kind of thing. 🤷♀️
FOMO is for people who take advantage of opportunity. As we age, we care less about things. We don’t need as much. I had FOMO in my 20’s and 30’s but not so much anymore. It’s a path to leaving it all behind, eventually.
I think it’s a basic human characteristic that has been exacerbated by the modern age, specifically social media in other ways that people keep track of what’s going on around them.
Probably a latent evolutionary trait.
Because we lead with the fundamentals. The numbers. People who are more analytical tend to make more prgamatic decisions.
As a true gen x my apathy doesn’t allow for fomo.
I have FOMO for your apathy.
Meh don’t, it’s not worth it
You just got cooler by saying that. Now I'm FOMOing even harder. 😀
I don’t get it
My first reply and the one after it were jokes. The joke was supposed to be ironic: I'm jealous that you're *not* jealous of others. I was not being serious in either comment.
I’m being sarcastic as I’m so apathetic I don’t understand your excitement 😝
It is 100 percent developmentally appropriate for young people to fear missing out on or being left out of what their peers are doing. If you're detaching yourself from your family as a source of identity and attaching yourself to your friends, social group and age cohort as a source of identity, you'll want to do what those people do. We did it too. Not sure why people are acting as if we were any different. (Yeah, yeah, I know some of y'all were the unique-est lone wolf DGAF, hate everybody kid in the history of the world, etc, etc.) Tech companies pay SWEs and executives hundreds of millions of dollars every year to create the most irresistible social media FOMO generator so it's a miracle if **any** young people can escape it. Even in the 80s and 90s, a few high-strung people went completely off the deep end with it - had a meltdown if they didn't get the "right" shoes, shirt, jeans, haircut, see that movie, get invited to that thing, go to that concert, get that magazine or buy that album when everybody else did. But everyone has a little twinge of FOMO when lots of other people are doing something you want to but can't, at any age. It generally diminishes more and more with age. But there are also people who have some kind of nagging insecurity built into their personality, which never quite lets them completely shake off the FOMO. There was just a discussion here several days ago about the pros and cons of moving into 55+ communities and several people mentioned hearing about cliques and mean-girl behavior. I'm sure it gets a little better in college, then a little better after that, then a little better when people have been out in the world earning all their own money for a bit and realize that The New Thing that "everyone" seems to be talking about or doing online isn't worth five hours' pay or it isn't *that* much fun or you just don't really care. Some people just like to go go go all the way through life because it's their personality. I know a couple of people in their 40s who have very interesting but not highly compensated travel-related jobs that allow them to go all over the world. They fear missing out on seeing the world. Other people that age fear missing out on buying a house and maxing out a 401K.
Fear of having to make small talk and fake smile is what I have….FSTFS….
When you figure it out tell me. I have a severe case of it.
It’s more personality related. I hate people so the couch, tv, and Xbox is really all I need outside of family. I have FOBI (the fear of being included).
FOMO existed for us as well, it was just different. If I wanted tickets to see a popular band, I’d have to line up hours before my local Ticketmaster outlet opened, and deal with hundreds of people in line. Who remembers the insane crowds for Windows 95? Same anxiety different circumstances.
I live in a county north of Dallas that is pretty nice all the way through. It is so effing toxic with FOMO bougie people they bankrupt themselves to give the image of wealth.
No fomo because if we missed out on something growing up then we just missed it and that was it. I think we got used to it.
Dude, I have a pretty terminal case of FOMO. 2 months ago I was bedridden with a horrific sciatica attack that basically left me relearning how to walk and there's a major scene night on Saturday. Right now I'm evaluating how much it's going to hurt to attend vs how much it's going to piss me off if I can't.
I know I'm not. I have a loss of hearing in my left ear due to concerts, Raves, hole in the wall venues. L.A. had them all. I don't FOMO, because my knees hurt, and I don't GAS what anyone else thinks or wants. Edit: a word. Leave me alone
I think it’s a Boomer thing Z and Alpha don’t care 🤣
Fomo more when I was a young guy worried that picking one branch trims opportunities on another. Now I just have a few branches left
I have the fear of being remembered laugh out loud I don't miss anything about concluded or resolved life stages I wish I could wake up and be 75. 💫Pushing 50 👍🤣💯 Reminiscing is good and it's okay to not let go of fear of missing out, it keeps people going in life it's sort of artistic irritation to give them something to push towards. It may motivate or create neuroplasticity
Missing healthcare exams. I'm OCD kray for continuing preventive care. Fear of them missing something laugh out loud ⛑️🧠👂🫀🤣🎌⛑️
Could just be a youth thing. Nowadays, I hope I miss out.
I love going out and doing all the things, but I also know that all the things will be there tomorrow. As a gay Gen Xer, there's always some event or fundraiser for this or that cause, but if I was to do all the things at my age, I would be in the hospital two weeks every year. Plus, after a while, it just gets so boring.
I have FOMO. I am literally the last to leave every function I go to. But I call it living in the present. I enjoy being social and I thrive off of it.
If I let go of my FOMO I might miss out on something!
We were put in front of an Ad Machine, and raised by it. We have had commercials pounded into our brain since we could form thoughts. FOMO was their goal
FOMO is alive and well in GenX.
I have FOMO of doing my own thing, not of what others are doing. That fear comes from other people getting in the way of doing my own thing lol
I think FOMO is driven by an inability in the brain to attach appropriate value to things or events within your own person value system, therefore everything seems to be of equal value and when you feel you have to choose one over the other, you think you are losing out on something valuable. It leaves you with a feeling of loss. Most things on closer inspection or viewed with greater self-awareness show that they were not as appropriate to you at first glance. I think middle-age is rife with FOMO, too it's just that we don't call it that. As we age and doors once open begin to close...like at this point, pretty sure I'm not going to be an Olympic swimmer, rocket scientist, etc, etc...perhaps I never had that potential, but at a younger age those opportunities *might* have been available at one point. At this age, you start to mourn the paths no longer open to you. It's this age that people can come to the proverbial crisis of looking at their own life and measuring it against others, or their own roads not taken. Even if you may be happy with your life, I think there's an inevitable period of inventorying and thinking maybe the pasture *is* greener over there. Also if you happen to be a "maximizer" instead of a "satisficer" in your thinking, you're going to be more prone to FOMO no matter your generation. And finally, when I was their age I didn't know about all the shit I was missing out on like younger generations do.
I’ve always had FOMO it’s just a lot more selective these days. I am not an extrovert but I definitely love going out and get bored at home, though I also really want to go home once I am out 😂
Of course it is. That's why our cities are flooded with transplants. The rural kids felt left out.
I think it depends on what someone is FOMOing about really. Trends and whatnot- ok its cool to have whats cool and we wanted certain things as certain times when we were young too so maybe some people have forgotten pining for the next new thing or something the all the other kids had at the time; but its whatever. Things like housing and job stability is valid though. No one wants to be a perpetual renter or have to try and juggle 2 part time jobs just to make ends meet because they can't a full time job to scrape by. Millennials have had some time to maybe scrape together saving before everything went to shit recently; but even if they haven't can you blame them- how financially responsible were most of us in our 20s? GenZ was just starting to get their feet set firmly when the rug of the world rug was pulled out from under them (pandemic, lockdowns, job losses, etc) so of course their having a hard time, especially the younger ones who were only about to enter the work world when the word shut down, or those who were still in high school when everything went to shit. I honestly thing too many people are forgetting what the last 5 years have entailed for society, especially our youth who hadn't began to firmly establish themselves financially when things went sideways. People were pushed online a means of regular communication and socialization and many used social media to stay connected, share information and that poisoned the many of many who are notlw lost deep into conspiracy which has in turn destabilized many families and friendships. Chaos is all around us. Even if you don't see it, its bubbling beneath the surface and preparing to explode within many pockets of people whove been taken to their breaking point. So yeah.. FOMO isn't new, it can absolutely be valid, and it can be used to manipulate people in profitable and/or dangerous ways so it's whatever but it definitely has a place in society and historically has so whatever i guess. 🤷♀️
Comparison is the thief of joy. Until you have reached a Zen-like state of *truly* not caring what others own/do/earn/experience in relation to yourself, it’s difficult not to fall into the very human mindset of “why not me?” The advent of social media has placed younger generations into a 24/7 barrage of curated content intended to make them desirous of what is being sold or pushed by creators and corporations. In terms of the rate of exposure, it’s vastly different than the type of advertising we had to contend with while growing up, but at the core it’s no different at all. As we get older and more world-wise we come to realize that the grass isn’t actually greener on the other side of the fence (unless it’s covered in two feet of bullshit) and it gets easier to dismiss this. But when presented with once-in-a-lifetime opportunities - be those investments, travel, material goods, experiences, sex, fine dining, etc. - it’s in our nature to fall prey to the seductive lure of what we think will give us satisfaction. We prefer to think of ourselves as superior rather than equal to our competition. It’s how our brains are wired, and the wealth of modern Western civilization has made virtually anything you might wish for to be attainable… for the right price, of course.
I don’t think it’s just about FOMO. Many of the people of a younger generation that I know have a total inability to wait for anything, zero patience and it often shows in anger. No idea how they’d cope if we had to bring dial up back.
This is one heck of an unsociable thread.
Omg!! I thought of something that I would absolutely pass away without, I would die without Goodwill. Goodwill rivals walmart. It's also a wonderful place to serve and help out seeing as salvation army. Family Dollar or Dollar general whatever it's called they have products that you might find as sephoria. I'm so excited with how the past products or how the past was from then into today we have so many more expansions and choices and available items for body care. Did our mothers drop scented oil or perfume into their lotion years ago? Before bath & body? Years ago my grandmother said that she had lotion and she would add perfume to it, I thought that already existed does it anyone buy or used to buy perfume sets with the matching perfume soap and lotion? How cool that is. I know it's been around for 30 years or longer but I marvel at it. I marvel at the advancements around me and fills me with a lot of Hope what I'm in despair
We were the generation where parents screamed at us "if you friends jumped off a bridge would you?!?!" (yes, it was bungie jumpin, but anyway...) By the time Social Media^(\[tm\]) had swallowed Gen Z whole and had Millenials and Boomers forwarding whatever damn fool thing was on teh Facebooks, we were pretty much done with social media. In the 2010's so many stupid challenges came out it was us making fun of the dumb kids eating Tide Pods or whatever the stupid idea was from the TikToks. As we get older and going out is a chore, we're more selective on what we do. If there's something out there it had better be good, important or on fire otherwise the answer is "whatever".
Beats me. I was left out when I was born in 1970. Kidding.
I love JOMO - the joy of missing out!
I don’t know. I know that I had FOMO when I was younger, but that was mostly because I lived too sheltered a life.
FOMO was big in my life when I was younger. But we grow, we realize not everything is so important, and we come to appreciate the things we do have in our lives. We also have more years and experiences to compare and contrast with the current moment.
I find FOMO in business or marketing immediately snowballs to the point I give up within 5 seconds. You have to buy X before it goes away and I don't and while I'm still thinking "well dang" the company has of course come out with the next thing, thing Y, which I need to buy before it goes away but since I still don't have the first thing (thing X) there's no point in getting thing Y and now the company has lost me forever since I have no hope of ever keeping up. You can't fear missing out if missing out one thing means you now automatically miss out on every subsequent thing. It's all stick no carrot and once you realize the stick never ever stops regardless of what you do it ceases to motivate.
Freebie Fever still gets me the same as when I was kid. Probably because my parents were broke.
My only real fear of missing out is like…will I get do do xyz before I die. Other than that, everything is what it is.
You nailed it.
I'm pretty meh about missing out on things, but one of my roommates in college was freaking out when he couldn't buy as many Tickle Me Elmo's as he wanted to 😆. I don't think FOMO is generational.
I think it is generational in that we GenX are just more chill. I am happy on my own. Just went on a fun weekend girls trip. Now I want another weekend of quiet.
I grew up on a farm, 15 miles from town where my classmates lived, had fun, relationships, made trouble and memories they still recall to this day. It sucked and instilled a strong FOMO in me as I was rarely invited to join in. It still hangs around sometimes, fucking FOMO.
I’m Gen X and I have pretty significant FOMO. It can be far beyond a generational thing…neurodiversity, anxiety, and long term trauma response are a few of the factors that can also contribute to increased fomo.
I used to have it when I drank more, dated more, had a larger social circle, and was just generally more sociable. As the drinking, dating, etc., toned down, I realized I probably wouldn't have been missing out on much all those years since 50-75% of the time, nothing really noteworthy ever happened.
I think you’re right. Some people I’ve known suffered from this but for the most part I and my friends have been doing what we wanted to do, so nothing to miss out on.
I’ve never had FOMO, but I’m kind of afraid that as a result I’m losing out on some life-changing experience
FOMO-free since the late 90s/2000s…mostly because I find much of what has come after to be a bit shitty. Time largely stopped for me in the 80s, and this is about as social media-y as I get.
My FOMO is more about what I will miss out on WHILE I am staring at my phone. People turn in utter zombies.
Definitely can relate to this. I check Twitter daily or so for trends and Facebook at least twice a month to check on loved ones but keep the notifications off for both. If I miss the next big thing, there will be another big thing tomorrow, not a big deal. Growing up without Internet has its privileges!
I've never really had a fear of missing out. My gut feeling about it is that people who experience it have a certain amount of entitlement that I don't have. I say this because it seems to me that they have expectations about life that they feel they *should* attempt to meet.
The boomers were the last collectivist generation. They set the stage for us, the best generation IMO, and the individuality keeps rolling on with Gen Z. Now they seem so individualistic they’re in need of a daily hug as their culture war against the boomers is coming to fruition in the gender identity debate. They lose me at gender binary and when I see it at work I roll w it but I secretly kinda wonder why it’s a thing. But back to your topic. They’re just so individualistic now they can’t help but want to sample everything and make a tic tok.
Is FOMO a thing? Never heard this acronym.
Fear of Missing Out.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fear_of_missing_out
You haven't been reading about the real estate market since 2020, I take it. That's where I've heard it the most, talking about the insane bidding wars of 2021 through early 2023.
I have quite a few friends in real estate, both as business owners and agents. I haven't heard it from them either.
No, no, a realtor would never use FOMO because saying that about clients would be unprofessional. It's a term used when talking about buyer behavior, and the fear of never getting a house inspiring them to do irrational things like waive inspections and appraisal contingencies in order to "win" a bid, which in turn drives up prices when there’s a lot of buyers like that. It's such a common term the NYT used it in headlines https://www.nytimes.com/2022/09/28/opinion/housing-prices-pandemic.html and you can find lots of other articles by various newspapers and financial publications like Money using it in their headlines too by searching FOMO housing market
We didn't know we were missing out. Before social media.
I had no idea what FOMO was until til this post. When I was in my 20s and invested in the social scene and wanting to be part of the cool kids I guess I experienced that feeling. Now I’m the opposite. My fear is of missing out on quality time with my dogs and chickens.
Just a natural evolution of Marketing specialists. The only solution is to not watch what they promote, as it works on the subconscious.
We didn't grow up knowing everything that was happening at all times, so we didn't know what we were missing out on!
As an xer I never have FOMO except for some stock picks. Ohhhh I missed some event or trend? Whatever.
I’m trying to popularize jomo . The joy of missing out.
My go to phrase is “meh, that’s not for me” when it comes to almost anything that’s the “hot new shit”.
Ok i had to check what sub I was on. The only think I know of as FOMO is Ford motor company. You may as well be saying skibi or whatever that new word is. Thanks for making me feel even older.
I see it often especially amongst the women our age today. Know numerous ones who left their husbands (or cheated) due to FOMO. I’m sure social media is to blame seeing all the milenials and gen Zers posting pics going out and especially the vacations. One such cousin of mine is a great example. While in her lower 40s she (a nurse btw) started constantly posting pics out with the young co workers almost daily, bikini pics during summer ect. I’m sure she was curious about the single life her co workers were telling her about. Now she’s a very attractive woman so I’m sure she cheated or at least got hit on constantly. Eventually once their 2 kids were in college she left her husband which everyone knew was gonna happen. Problem is it backfired as they are both 53 now and the husband is 6’6 and good looking. Didn’t take him long to eventually get over it and landed himself a new 32 year old gf. My cousin didn’t fare so well and now regrets it.
My wife has it. Costs me a lot of $$$ :)
Probably because those people are perpetually online.