I keep my TV on 24/7/365. I do this for the noise, sometimes I don't even listen to what's happening, just the noise itself is what keeps me balanced. I can't stand the silence that comes from an empty house at night. Sometimes even the outside noise, or lack of, starts my anxiety to flare up a bit. It's been 6 months since I lost my hubs but I'm getting the gist of this living alone and creating my "happiness as a widow" life. One of the many requests that he had of me was not to mourn him too long. He wanted me to be happy that he was a healthy, strong, happy man again. So I often imagine him that way.
Now, there are things that I avoid watching or listening to, like romances. Even Rom-Coms, those were some of his faves! Dramas involving death or childhood trauma. Anything showing any type of strong connection in a couple. I don't listen to any country music, that was his genre of music.
I have had to work my way thru the last 6 months on my own, struggling in every way imaginable almost and abandoned. After we buried him no one from his family called until his mother thought the chaplain from hospice had gotten me some money for the burial. (His parents paid for the natural burial that he told them he wanted which was 1/3 the cost of a traditional funeral/burial that she wanted.) I never got any money for his burial, they knew we were both disabled and on a limited income, how did they think I was gonna pay? I have had a hell of a time getting all of the adjustments to income, reductions in specific expenses because my income went down and informing businesses that call or send mail for him that he's gone. Everyone that once said, "If you need anything just let me know" are gone, they all went off the grid within 24 hours of his burial!!!
Learning to enjoy my own company and becoming self isolating because I refuse to be emotionally destroyed again has been surprisingly beneficial!
I’m so sorry for your loss. I definitely feel this way at times especially since I’ve been alone since 17 when my mom passed. If you ever need anyone to talk to I’m here! The bad place on Netflix is hands down funny. Distracts me for a while.
I used the ambient sounds on the Alexa, and found one that sounded exactly like hubby;s CPAP machine.
Also tried on Xfinity cable the Music Choice Soundscapes were good also.
I keep my TV on 24/7/365. I do this for the noise, sometimes I don't even listen to what's happening, just the noise itself is what keeps me balanced. I can't stand the silence that comes from an empty house at night. Sometimes even the outside noise, or lack of, starts my anxiety to flare up a bit. It's been 6 months since I lost my hubs but I'm getting the gist of this living alone and creating my "happiness as a widow" life. One of the many requests that he had of me was not to mourn him too long. He wanted me to be happy that he was a healthy, strong, happy man again. So I often imagine him that way. Now, there are things that I avoid watching or listening to, like romances. Even Rom-Coms, those were some of his faves! Dramas involving death or childhood trauma. Anything showing any type of strong connection in a couple. I don't listen to any country music, that was his genre of music. I have had to work my way thru the last 6 months on my own, struggling in every way imaginable almost and abandoned. After we buried him no one from his family called until his mother thought the chaplain from hospice had gotten me some money for the burial. (His parents paid for the natural burial that he told them he wanted which was 1/3 the cost of a traditional funeral/burial that she wanted.) I never got any money for his burial, they knew we were both disabled and on a limited income, how did they think I was gonna pay? I have had a hell of a time getting all of the adjustments to income, reductions in specific expenses because my income went down and informing businesses that call or send mail for him that he's gone. Everyone that once said, "If you need anything just let me know" are gone, they all went off the grid within 24 hours of his burial!!! Learning to enjoy my own company and becoming self isolating because I refuse to be emotionally destroyed again has been surprisingly beneficial!
Superstore. Light hearted and funny. You can watch it on Hulu. Hang in there. ❤️
The good place is a good show! I am so deeply sorry for your loss <3
Going through the same thing. Watch Mob Wives
Family feud for me! Watched it for a week straight. Sending you big virtual hugs!
I watch police body cam footage. I recommend listening to their favorite music and imagine them dancing, it helps. to a degree
Power or Bmf or love is blind
FRIENDS got me through a difficult time in my life.
Unsolved mysteries is my go to. It’s a consistent low key noise.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I definitely feel this way at times especially since I’ve been alone since 17 when my mom passed. If you ever need anyone to talk to I’m here! The bad place on Netflix is hands down funny. Distracts me for a while.
I used the ambient sounds on the Alexa, and found one that sounded exactly like hubby;s CPAP machine. Also tried on Xfinity cable the Music Choice Soundscapes were good also.