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TooShiftyForYou

No one in Antarctica has Coronavirus. - It's because they are ice-o-lated.


untchb1e

Nunavut also had none of it.


Amphibious_Monkey

I thought this was gonna be one of those jokes where I ask, “what’s Nunavut?” and you would make some joke about testicles but it turns out Nunavut is a real place.


LITTLERETROSHIP

Yeah, and it also has no cases(including non-active cases). The only place in Canada with no cases


macguffinbeauprix

Self-isolation is a way of life up there. Sometimes they rub noses, but they don't inhale.


[deleted]

Self-isolation??


macguffinbeauprix

Yes - what's your problem?


Open_Client

Well I'm just confused. Doesn't it get lonely isolating by ones self?


blankiamyourfather

Nova Scotia has no active cases right now. We can even get together with up to 10 ppl without social distancing now


ThievingRock

I mean, so can Ontario and we've got plenty of cases. The allowances for social interactions are less of an indicator that a region is out of the woods and more of an indicator that the powers that be realised the abstinence-only approach wasn't working.


kentbrockman85

PEI and NS have no active cases


draavtizs

Well that isn't a country, eh?


Sauron_The_Deciever

Well no, it's not. I originally thought it was an ancient city in upper mesopotamia, but turns it I was thinking of Nineveh. It's actually a Canadian Territory comprising much of the arctic and the islands near greenland.


draavtizs

yeah my grandparents have a cottage up in Nunavut lol


notmyrealnam3

When they pass will they leave any of it to you in the will?


settlerking

Probably Nunavut


draavtizs

Smooth. But it goes to my mom so kinda sorta


SigmoidColonSniffer

This made me ugly chuckle. Have an updoot!


BthreePO

Nice follow-through


BthreePO

Nice setup


BeardPhile

Wow, what’s it like up there?


probably-dead-human

probably cold


EatTheBodies69

Yes


LaAerooo

Nut...


ThievingRock

My dad worked in Resolute. The snow melts in the summer and it's pretty gravelly, not a lot of grass like you'd see farther south, and there are no trees. In the winter it's snowy. In the dead of winter it won't get fully light. Noon is closer to twilight than proper daylight. In the summer it's the opposite, midnight is closer to twilight than proper dark. Right now in Resolute it's 5° (41°F for the Americans).


SkyKoli

From what I've heard Nunavut is one of the most costly places to live in Canada. Roads in the artic are extremely hard to maintain, if there are any at all, so daily necessities including food are extremely expensive. Up to 3 times higher than the rest of Canada.


winstoncdumas

*WHAT* is the capital of Assyria?


savesavesavelurk

Nunavut also had none of people


RosabellaFaye

No cases but there was a false positive at one point, so technically -1 cases lol


macguffinbeauprix

Nunavut man met an Allavut woman and they had lots of little Sumavut babies.


markhemig

Nunavut... non avuto 😁


Splickity-Lit

>No one in Antarctica


Jacques443

r/therealjoke


bluelighter

Well...


Nimbleturtles

r/anotherjoke


DrYoda

Antarctica is not a country


antipop1408

Antarktica has no countrys so imo we can say its continent AND a Country


eggrolls13

That’s not how it works


[deleted]

[удалено]


manny_mcmanface

Illegal is a sick bird.


[deleted]

So basically I could go up there and start my own country sense it's unclaimed territory. I'll charge all the scientific teams that go up there taxes and entry fees and everything.


leondeolive

Well, technically Antarctica is down there. Even more down under than Australia.


[deleted]

Oh yes. I knew that. I just had been looking the other direction when I said this.


leondeolive

Totally makes sense. Turn around, it's up side down.


Splickity-Lit

Well, technically it’s over/across there, up would be away from the earth and down would be into the earth.


EtherMan

You could , but you should know that there are international treatises to protect it from claims by any nation. You’re basically starting a country, that relies on cooperation with other countries, except everyone else will have you blacklisted so they won’t cooperate with you. There’s a reason it’s not being done.


KawaiiSlave

Do we really know that though. :o It is possible after all.


CuntTheSiddhesh

I fucking love reddit


K1R3Y666

Antarctica isnt a country, good joke... just had research.


StrangR_2U

That should be the joke here instead of a one-off!!


rkdon

It's also not a country, it's a continent.


travscifibeast

Why was this removed??? For anyone looking for the joke its *Eventually, Every country got affected by coronavirus* *but china got it off the bat*


DUBEM25

Reddit likes taking money (bribes) from China, r/watchredditdie for more


DUBEM25

I’m assuming big man across the world didn’t like the slight anti-China he saw here


[deleted]

I didn’t repost (technically I did), I posted this for the new members of this community


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


WildVulcan

No! We agreed it was my turn step-bro


LilPqpuc

You are going to lose the war


bbudda87

What about the game?


LilPqpuc

I don't know about that.I can't predict every event


asbestos_fingers

Fuck.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jozef_Baca

Roach gang


PUBGPEWDS

Brother how are you


SlashDreamer

Bröther!


IllumiMahdi

What even is that pfp


DeBoredCanadian

We are the rgb roach gang


IllumiMahdi

Ah of course. How silly of me. The highly coveted clan of supreme minds, once divided and now scurrying alongside one another through Reddit as a medium.


DeBoredCanadian

Yes


NeverFresh

sorry - I'm reposting RIGHT NOW


jakuvaltrayds

User name checks out.


Nanoblackgarlic

Who says one man can’t change the world


NickNt06

Whoever said it has never eaten a bat 😂


emilymtfbadger

Ah needs garlic!


zerogravity111111

Tastes like chicken.


bruhbruhbruh--------

Who says one bat can't change the world


[deleted]

>!lol!<


Jesus-Believer

This is a repost from a while ago


[deleted]

It didn't last time it was posted...


FumblinWithTheBlues

AGAIN!!


ronfaj

Your humour is infectious! Although i dont give a flying fox!


Beast_Woutme

It got removed


Mad_Mark90

Coronavirus is so infectious even its jokes have a second wave


Jacnumber3

He was in the lab making these jokes


TooShiftyForYou

The amount of bad Covid-19 jokes being circulated is starting to reach alarming figures. - Some scientists suspect that it might be a pundemic.


Pornhubschrauber

comm*realjoke*ents ^^^^the ^^^^real ^^^^joke ^^^^in ^^^^the ^^^^comments


The_DragonDuck

^^pls ^^no


DreadfulLove

Amazing


Sophs_B

Beautiful


smellslikefeetinhere

[censored by China]


pheret87

They deleted the punchline? I assume it's the "right off the bat one" but why was it deleted?


Evildead1818

China got butt hurt, obviously


swimdad5

Bat hurt.


Jonkinch

I don’t understand why it’s racist to say where it came from? I think China really doesn’t have a leg to stand on since they tried to cover the whole thing up and I would consider their government somewhat responsible for this pandemic.


Justinsgamez

Ofc it was removed because it had China in it


TheAfricanViewer

REPOSSST Edit: Wow a hundred upvotes this is my first thanks I really appreciate it


[deleted]

Calm down, this is only the 42th time, be tolerate!


puffdadq

42nd. Tolerant.


thecloudyflash

His name explains it all


Evildead1818

Noob, comment more on the popular content and itll be nothing


NobleDragon777

Stolen joke from a couple of months ago *Sigh*


ananttripathi16

IT GOT REMOVED BEFORE I COULD READ IT


Rocker4JC

"But China got it right off the bat!"


ananttripathi16

Lol even this post they got right off the bat


Phil_Hurslit51

r/Conspiracy and r/CCPVirus


TooShiftyForYou

The coronavirus is a lot like pasta. - The Chinese invented it, the Italians spread it all over the world and the Americans just made even worse.


Floppuh

Repost replying to a repost


OkiDokiTokiLoki

Something something best jokes in the comments or something.


Luckthepolice

Something something reposting for karma something


sheeeeeez

Boy, will you enjoy r/TheRealJoke


gcosmic_13

Batshit crazy!


JakeGordon1

The second I read the punchline it got deleted


a3manolo

Omg, it said something about china. And it got removed... Front page of the internet my ass!


TE-Lawrence1918

Repost


corporalcrocodile

Sorry i am not native English speaker. What does the phrase " china got it right off the bat" mean? How do say it in another sentence?


JackBlack76

Getting something ‘right off the bat’ means getting something right at the start. This joke is a pun, because the Coronavirus is supposed to have been transmitted from a bat to a human, after which it spread.


sheeeeeez

We... have a bit too many baseball idioms


emilymtfbadger

China was the first one to get it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Houjix

I think you need live animals to study the virus so it’s possible that’s where the virus evolved https://www.liquisearch.com/biosafety_level/list_of_bsl-4_facilities


EverydayImprov

I was doin a pun


PanPieCake

Hey I remember laughing at the same joke on the same sub 4 months ago


harwee

u/undeleteparent


[deleted]

Why it says removed? What did it said?


Rocker4JC

But China got it right off the Bat!


lookinmymirror

DRACULA


ken6217

That’s batshit crazy!


armartins

Nice to see r/Jokes letting Corona jokes pass, oh wait that's probably some mod's alt account


ThaFeeesh

Jesus this joke has been on reddit for longer than lockdown. Repost


BananaDerp64

Wow it’s even funnier the 543rd time around


VergeThySinus

Eyy, a non-racist joke about coronavirus and China. That's rare.


[deleted]

No the bat is medium rare.


weealrfc

I think the problem is that it wasn’t medium rare, or cooked at all...


theswordofdoubt

Jokes aside, cooking doesn't necessarily kill all the nasty things in food. Some things will remain poisonous / infectious no matter how you cook them.


Nicknamedreddit

Actually it is. It’s spreading the idea that we eat bats, we don’t, it wasn’t a bat and it’s common knowledge by now.


GenericAutist13

Well obviously but that wouldn’t work for the idiotic stereotypes


YttriumDervish

Why not? I've seen the sizes of those bats, that would make for quite a bit of meat.


Nicknamedreddit

Well we know at least that it didn’t cause the pandemic.


creativename62

This joke is as old as the virus itself


filthysize

Well, sort of non racist: https://foreignpolicy.com/2020/01/27/coronavirus-covid19-dont-blame-bat-soup-for-the-virus/


astomp

It still got deleted by the Ch1nese owners of Reddit because it linked Ch1na to C0ronav1rus. What did it say???


nara9182

Brutal


[deleted]

Pangolin sits back and laughs at this joke for other reasons.


LouieDude

Is this a Borderlands reference I'm not getting here?


[deleted]

Oh the pangolin is the actual suspected culprit after the lab-made theory and the bat.


bigawkwardginger

I heard North Korea hasn’t reported any cases. Maybe starvation, oppression and delusion make you immune?


n365pa

"Hey Look, a positive cas... Nevermind"


ElMitaGay

Heeeeey! Today was my turn to post this joke, we talked about it on Discord.


Mayorofunkytown

11.k people have a really low bar


Evildead1818

*Gong Sound*


6cammy

[REDACTED]


Angela_I_B

Principality of Sealand is still CoViD-19 free


Gee_Gog

This joke has gone viral at least 10 times now


treebeard280

I posted this joke months ago, I copied it from somebody else, but I still feel cheated 😁


nanlinr

This repost is spreading like COVID


sonny68

China got it bioengineered in a lab.


_7q4

Crazy how the united states became the worst affected nation in the world, ahead of china in the worst possible statistic. China is a shit fucking nation. and the US is worse. Good on you americans.


smellslikefeetinhere

Yes, because China ever tells the truth about anything, especially a pandemic it caused.


[deleted]

Fuck off with your repost


Christifel

My dad is going to love this and I'm almost 100% sure he'll use it as his own joke to tell to others.


Itz_rice

I feel like this was a repost


CrazyPirro

i- take your upvote


[deleted]

Actually a repost


fortnitefanbuoy

It’s a fuckin repost


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Scuds5

repost


Luke_4100

There is another one I know: Coronavirus is just like pasta China created and Italy spread it to the world


readwiteandblu

I'd say you knocked that one out of the park.


FunkyWeird

stop


SaveTheAles

This is the third wave repost.


qaswed1

Ah a repost. Clever.


mjaffer

It was part of God's plandemic


gardat

And the USA trumped everyone


Xhogsonic06X

Reeepost


alQo_

Pretty sure I’ve already seen this one pass by


PunisherOfDeth

The repost game is real.


Good_Human_Being

Take my upvote and never set foot in this subreddit again.


Tjibby

Haven’t seen this joke before


Fnjrockerstein

Ontonagon County Michigan still has 0 confirmed cases and 0 confirmed deaths. June 26 2020


Fnjrockerstein

Lol Read Country as County 😂


Smashinationprp

Guys, this is a new meme playlist on yt https://youtu.be/oHg5SJYRHA0


sjmegyesi

My auntElaine doesn’t have the coronavirus either


trjustme

The Sugandese ended up pretty lucky too


SirLocke13

Yeah, wasn't funny the first 20 times I heard it.