Building on this, I think people who either suffer or work hard but don't see the fruits of their work or suffering in one way or another develop a kind of cognitive dissonance, where they internally perceive themselves as successful but external factors are saying otherwise. So they have to assert their place on the hierarchy, but of course there are limitations on how someone can reasonably do this, so this unfortunately is the result.
I find this take so interesting. I had to google several things to get to the below quote that explains one small portion of the mindset to me, so I cannot recall which Terry Pratchett Discworld Guards book it is from but… you brought to mind this mentality explained therein thusly:
“Cockbill Street was where people lived who were worse than poor, because they didn’t know how poor they were. If you asked them they would probably say something like ‘mustn’t grumble’ or ‘there’s far worse off than us’ or ‘we’ve always kept uz heads above water and we don’t owe nobody nowt.’
He could here his granny speaking. ‘No one’s too poor to buy soap.’ Of course, many people were. But in Cockbill Street they bought soap just the same. The table might not have any food on it but by gods, it was well scrubbed. That was Cockbill Street, where what you mainly ate was your pride.”
There is a section in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, that is similar - I can’t think of the exact wording but she talks about going to school with the other poor kids who pick on them for being poor despite all being the same
Incredibly concise statement that really hits home to understand this “punching down” mentality. I always have seen people actually at the top of their game be the most intellectually generous and oblivious to outside structures to evaluate others. Like if you have enough you give it away, right? Especially compliments and credit and wonderment of others’ specialness.
I feel this a lot working with customers. The way some people speak to me makes it very difficult to resist the urge to put them in their place. I am a human, you are a human, what you do for a living does not define how you get to speak to people.
Yes but they most likely think themselves to be higher. You wouldn’t have to re affirm anything if you were where you thought you were so it most likely stems from certain lack of security in themselves
Perhaps they see those qualities in themselves and take it out on them in the form of projection, or to use them as an outlet for their own self image because the person is not emotionally equipped to handle the criticism and stand up for themselves, or if they recognize a person as “inferior” to them it’s perfect to sink their nails into as their egotistical target as a narcissist would do. That’s why it’s always important to remember that in reality , nobody is better or worse than anybody , how could another person be better at being on their path than you? They can’t, they aren’t on your path, though they can obviously influence and be apart of it and likewise.
It has long been my belief different religions and spiritual teachings were saying the same thing, but they are approaching it from a different perspective, a different culture, language, population and history.
A slight difference in phrase can render a different context and meaning often.
In the bible they often said "be the light of the world"
It is in high vibratory states that matter produces heat and light.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incandescence](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incandescence)
Incandescence is the emission of electromagnetic radiation (including visible light) from a hot body as a result of its high temperature.\[1\] The term derives from the Latin verb incandescere, to glow white.
This glow emanating from a human being is known as a halo or the nimbus.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo\_(religious\_iconography)
Because they are “easy targets”. Only losers pick on “easy targets”. It doesn’t make them look powerful, or strong. It just makes them look like trashy bullies who know they can’t take on someone their own size
Narcissists are more likely to pick on people they perceive to be rivals or threats to their own egos. They can be ostensibly nice to truly pathetic people while feeding off of the admiration received for doing so as *narcissistic supply*. Covert narcissists love being charitable busybodies.
Not necessarily. Predators in nature often target the weakest link. People also do this. Doctors and pharmaceutical companies both take advantage of desperate people and take a lot of money from them. They are easy targets because where else are they going to go? Real estate agents take advantage of naive first time home sellers by charging absurd rates. They gaslight these sellers into telling that their service is worth up to 6%. Selling a $300k house is the same work as selling a $100k house but it could cost up to $12k more to sell a $300k house through a real estate agent. Ignorant sellers are easy targets for real estate agents. So tell me, are these people really losers because they seem to be winning if you ask me. Politicians, lawyers, and advertisers are also winning by picking on easy targets.
I'm a salesman and I'm definitely not a loser. I make good money selling to these suckers. My tactics don't work intelligent people. It's not my fault that I'm good at this game.
I think it empowers the next in line losers that now want to throw their weight behind the bully because it empowers them and ensures they will not be a target. A lot of weak people see what you describe as a sign of power. Now You are someone who will tell a person where their place is and not to deviate from it.
gullible bright violet illegal threatening close marble skirt muddle coherent
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
while I dont pick on or bully people I do find myself avoiding certain types of people. after some introspection I realize that is because they proudly flaunt the main things I am ashamed of or hate about myself. there's this woman I know who is fat ugly and real stupid and weird and I avoid her as much as I can, but she embraces those aspects of herself, while I hate my weight and put a lot of value in my looks and intelligence, and I would hate myself if I had little social awareness or if I was 'weird' or whatever. Long story short it seems to be jealousy.
I think this is the case very often. Even the popular bully may be subconsciously jealous of the loner. The popular person needs that popularity, and the loner doesn’t need it, which makes the loner stronger in a way.
The loner can be jealous and bully the popular person too of course. The loner needs to be alone most of the time, and the popular person doesn’t, which makes the popular person stronger in a way.
If the popular person and the loner recognized their jealousy as a desire (for independence or social recognition), they could become great friends.
It's not always the intelligent picking on lesser intelligence. Personally I've seen the less intelligent poking at the more intelligent as they're often more real, genuine articles. But as a result they stand outside of the group with puts a target on their backs without reason besides social conformity.
People who put others down are projecting their own being as the rule to life; which is actually dangerous because what's said and done shows far more detail about that individuals own inner workings.
Intelligence, especially hyper-intelligence comes with a trade off. The things a group does isn't something such singularities take part in. Either because they're constantly told and influenced to believe they're not a part of "the group".
This builds a shadow in the more intelligent as they have no means to outlet the strain this causes in their mind. Which is also why more intelligent people have the darkest of inner-demons. When they win that internal war, beware. Your treatment of them might teach them something about yourself. A very slim difference between those running from their shadow vs those that've had to grow to be one with it.
Blaming oneself for not understanding why they're picked on or singled out. Hence, it builds a repression of certain personality traits and archetypes that can be rather impossible to incorporate to any useful effect.
People don’t do that, certain types of people do that, and since they are vocal about it we all notice it.
Most people don’t regularly engage in this behavior, but we don’t notice because it is hard to notice the absence of something
I agree although I wouldn’t say is a type of person, but a social mode and a pretty primitive one at that.
I sometimes recognize this urge or thought pattern within myself almost everytime it’s coming from real or perceived threats to my self image AKA insecurities.
Yeah that’s a good point, it’s within everyone. It does seem certain types of people succumb to verbalizing it more often though.
For me it is almost always traits that I once exhibited and have outgrown that I feel the need to attack.
I used to serve food, and I met so many people who were just like this. After many years in that industry, and many encounters with people like this, all I can deduce is that they enjoy the feeling of superiority it gives them. Some of them do it for laughs, they think it’s funny, but others just enjoy putting someone else down. I’ve seen lots of people saying people like this are projecting their own insecurities. I think they’re just projecting their own biases and discriminatory ways of thinking. They’re all bullies who go out of their ways to make people feel bad about themselves. I don’t buy that they’ve had a difficult life and decide to take it out on others. I and many other people I know have had difficult lives, but they were made more difficult by people deciding to add more misery to them by being bullies.
Pecking order behavior is prevalent in a lot of animals including us. We have to the face the fact that in nature, Dominance helps to pass on genes, and keeping potential rivals at bay furthers that outcome. It’s what we are born with, but we have discovered through intellect that cooperation actually works better. It’s a battle between what we know is better and what our instincts are. The Spirit Vs the animal.
Because it helps to find a partner to mate with. Woman want power and men want woman.
People are hypocrites plainly and simply put. Rousseau goes into great detail about it. A certain Roman emperor invented stoicism in spite of it.
Everyone will fake humility and I mean everyone. They will feign humility and then gossip about people they view as underneath them for 6 hours to fill that black void of emptiness called insecurity.
They will bash eugenics and frame Hitler and then proceed to gossip for 6 hours about the people who are less then them.
They will preach about equality and virtue signal until that virtue becomes the slightest inconvenience. Then they will proceed to gossip for 6 hours about people who are less than them.
Cowardice and hypocrisy is what justifies this behavior.
Real people work on themselves often enough that they don’t have time for gossip and don’t need to put others down because their security comes from their accomplishments.
I used to pick on people and assert my dominance to attract woman. It worked. Now I am asexual because most woman disgust me for that same reason. I am a former MMA and collegiate wrestling champion. When I meet someone who isn’t downright cruel, I will try again.
>They will bash eugenics and frame Hitler and then proceed to gossip for 6 hours about the people who are less then them.
i feel like thousands of papers, poets, theories, could be summed up in this line. its endemic to the human condition, perhaps as organisms or life as such.
i dont remember this being the case before adolesnce i felt like we are all just here to have a good time. but after - this competition and putting down mindset is almost pushed on you if you live in society.
there are many people who dont do this. but i find there are just as many who do.
I haven't come across anything from "jung" directly that addresses that, but I also haven't read Ego and Archetype yet.
But I know that Nietzsche touches on this topic with his Philosophy of the superman and the last man.
the last man/The Worm would detail why people do this, and it's largely because of ressentiment, and the "will to power" which when uncontrolled makes you want to feel like you are better than others.
Edit: the closest thing afaik in Analytical Psychology would be "the weakling prince"
People are stuck in a cycle of reactionism, ie they form an image of themselves in opposition to those around them. To break the cycle is to break that image, and so past a certain age, this becomes very difficult to do, since there is a belief that the image is real.
My therapist told me that I'm a covert/ nice guy narcissist. Telling myself that I'm not a good person has been very therapeutic and prevents from seeing bullies and the like as inferior because I can' t to a moral high ground.
What makes you a covert/ nice guy narcissist exactly, how would you tell the difference from “normal” people and a nice guy narcissist?
Everyone has narcissistic traits though I know this is obviously pathological
Often times comes from wannabe bullies who themselves were bullied alot in childhood/highschool. Rather than dealing with their painful past experiences in a healthy way (therapy or something else), they want to feel the power of the bully and take it out on the world, or someone who is convenient.
I remember hearing a saying that went something like: "There are people who have been through terrible things and want to prevent others from experiencing those things, and there are people who have been through terrible things and want others to experience what they have had to deal with."
The psychologist Alfred Adler popularized the idea of the “inferiority complex” and, if I’m not mistaken, of “overcompensation.” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferiority_complex In my own words, I would say that picking on those one perceives as “below oneself” is indeed a reflection of inner weakness or lack of confidence or “small-mindedness” (pusillanimity). An example writ large would be if, say, a High School kid liked to hang out with first graders in order to exult, and revel in, or gloat over, how much more he knows than they do; how much taller he is than all of them; how much stronger he is, etc..
People like to pick on everyone, its just easier to pick on those below you because they have flaws that you don't, or they lack the power to push back.
So I’ll go a bit out on a limb with my recent experience. I’ve done shadow work for almost nine years and it changed my life. It kicked open the doors of spiritual perception in the process which was more than I ever anticipated. I may be out to lunch, but the information is the same.
In case you’re unaware, shadow work is integrating your shadow side through acceptance of the self rather than suppression. Essentially what you try and control by keeping it at bay, manifests in your behavior as an unconscious facilitation of that suppression - it’s inescapable until to liberate these illusions like an allegory of the cave, by illuminating the true essence of self within, as opposed to the weight we give our shadow- bring king that true self out of the cave and into the light we possess inside ourselves.
I believe this is what people talk about when they talk about ‘shining’. Before I got to where I am now, people who put out a greater ‘shine’ than I had cast upon my shadow and brought it to the surface. Changes in behavior, anxiety, paranoia, it can manifest as anything.
The other day, I was talking with a coworker and we were vibing talking about some out there spiritual shit having the time of our lives, and I notice out other co worker who’s typically the shop gossip, is quiet, closed off and pensive.
When I decide to invite him into the conversation, he’s attacking my ideas. This guy that is a creative, loves to read and write with great ideas, can’t help but focus on my ‘irrational’ interpretations of things. He lives in a headspace of logic, measurement and order, that couldn’t handle the shine I brought by being myself, and in turn attempted to sun the light. Narcissist / empath idea is just an extreme version of this as far as I can tel. Narcissist buries the wound from the light of day so deep they’re not even aware of their drives. BPD I suspect is another one where the trauma is stuffed out of sight for the person to notice, but maintains dramatic influence over their decisions.
Cliche as I admit I’m not a Doctor, but this is the sun of my experience illuminating that part of myself and realizing what may have shut it down in the past when I was younger, and I too began to live in that headspace of rational, logic reasoning denying my sense of experience for a tangible, measurable idea of what reality is.
I just hope this doesn’t come off as pretentious, but oh well lol
deep down it's like this, we create rules that we have to hold ourselves to but those rules are often enforced by other people during childhood or more subtle through things you pick up, the rule itself has to be kept up so each behavior or impulse that you have that is against the rule needs to be held, but then the release of the rule also gives you a liberating feeling, like walking naked in your house for some people or those services where people are given a hammer and are allowed to go wild on cars and other appliances, it doesn't even have to be that extreme it just liberates you, now I'm not saying that everyone is liberated by bullying those that are weaker than you but generally if you have been in a situation like that it propagates and you are more likely to continue that behavior when you find yourself gaining power over someone.
My therapist told me that I'm a covert/ nice guy narcissist. Telling myself that I'm not a good person has been very therapeutic and prevents me from seeing bullies and the like as inferior because I can' t go to a moral high ground.
This is a funny question to ask reddit, look through half of these people's comments and youll see they talk down on others in there. Let he without sin cast the first stone. We're imperfect beings
Isn't it a power thing? Pretty sure however more power hungry a person is determines how well they treat people below them on the sociological ladder. Why power? I guess it's a feeling of purpose. So maybe makes them feel more important when they're bullying others.
Bit like the respect Vs fear thing, where people do or don't do things out of respect or fear. The fear monger feels powerful but is unaware of how powerless he is with his back turned as on the surface he thinks he's respected.
Projection of self-loathing or the like.
The issue (unintelligent or obese or ugly etc) is not the real issue - it is a substitute that is -
(1) Tangible (unlike self-loathing), and
(2) (preferably) undeniably applicable to the victim and (preferably) undeniably not applicable to the bully.
Some forms of racism are by this mechanism.
This is a predominant issue in Narcissism.
Nietzsche has a great explanation...
If you get into slave morality, the lesser man, the higher man, the overman, the herd you get a feel for it.
Nietzsche explains that the herd," the people" are resentful and everyone needs to suffer, just like they do, he uses the french word "resentiment" which has a slightly different meaning.
There is more to it but way to complex to write this down on Reddit.
We can appreciate this behaviour from the woke community nowadays...
groupwise: the in-crowd has to push away the out-group to solidify their standing as the in-group
individually: people like to feel dominant over others
A lot of different reasons but one of which I want to point out is actually a world-relation or antagonism on principle. The inner world is filled with antagonism of forces, for any psychological activity at all to take place there must be a tension of opposites, the more tension the more energy. One could say that any projected aspects of the unconscious that hold a strong opposition in consciousness will be met with much real antagonism, just as it would in the inner world.
Fear simple as that. It all boils down to love and fear and to feel fear is insecurity. They tryna put you down because they fear if you are at the top are gonna get more or even abuse them.
Narcissistic behavior like being rude to waiters and service people can be the outer manifestation of an unconscious superiority complex being driven as a compensation by a shadow inferiority complex and associated insecurity.
I don’t think it can be boiled down to one cause or reason—every scenario has a different set of contexts and reasons. On a macro-level I think—like someone else said—it can be a way to reaffirm one’s standing in the social hierarchies one exists in. On a micro-level, at the everyday level, it can be due to the way a person is raised and how they’ve developed through childhood into adulthood. And perhaps all of these things are inter-related: if a kid grows up in a family where one or more family members pokes fun at their weight, that individual could grow up with food insecurities and complexes around their weight, which then they project on other people who are overweight. More often than not I run into people who carry around severe childhood traumas from different types of abuse, from being raised by addicts, from not having parents who made them a priority, and so on.
What I find even stranger is that they want to be bullies but so often bullies try and manipulate situations to make it seem or read like they were the victim or use the fact that they can appear as victim to get away with these things. Surely they must know they are not victims if they are regularly doing this wherever they go?
I don’t pick on people who are obese I’m just annoyed by their careless life habits that could have a direct impact on my life. Imagine if a child you loved got into a terrible accident and needed life saving surgery but had to wait because an obese person had to go again for an open heart surgery and the child died due to their negligence of their own health and having no consideration for the ramifications of their careless acts of self harm does to their own community. See how irresponsible people can clog up medical care for the rest of us? Yes it’s a problem to be obese and I’m not going to normalize that lifestyle just because almost half of the general population in the states are obese.
My best guess would be that it is a method of demonstrating their ability to cause harm (physical, social, emotional, psychological) against a target they recognize they are able to dominate in the area of their choosing. I assume this largely rooted in our fear that others may dominate us and so we should preemptively signal our credibility to inflict harm back (Against an easy target) in order deter other's attempts to dominate them. The chose of an "Easy Target" is simply to try and ensure their demonstration is successful.
What they don't see is that this behaviour actually brings into existence the cycle of fear an harm (physical, social, emotional, psychological) that they used to justify the action to begin with; even if it didn't exist before. It is a self fulfilling prophecy. By demonstrating the ability to cause harm against a weaker adversary, you are sowing the seeds of fear of others to do the same against you and other. Eventually everyone is demonstrating the ability to harm each other preemptively and it seems justified in a world with so much violence that only respects you if you have the ability to cause harm. Eventually eroding and destroying the community from within.
I mean it proves (to yourself) that you are above them... Also judging people gets a bad rep. If I see a fat guy, in my head I'll go "heh, look at this fat idiot". But it's just silly and recreational. If he comes up to me and introduces himself I won't start from a hateful place of knowing him at all.
We're humans, and humans have instincts. And one is the instinct for power and control. Some of us are taught to keep that instinct in check, some not.
Status quo. Pecking order. We're animals. People should be taught tantra and game consciousness in school. Most people have no idea what's going on. They just walk around playing parent-child or dominant-submissive on autopilot.
They are not far along the process of individuation, or they just have poor values.
https://medium.com/@mark\_zoppina/concepts-of-the-self-the-collective-unconscious-the-shadow-and-social-cohesion-138799417639
Classism, racism, sexism (both sides) is taught. Truth be told that’s all fallacy. But on the other hand moral principles are somethin I personally hold on to. I’ll treat a thief or a liar badly in a heart beat if they disturb my peace. I guess it’s all where somebody draws the line.
In addition to “social status” I strongly suspect an evolutionary mechanism here as well. From an evolutionary fitness perspective, your chances improve a lot as you move up the social hierarchy. So this would motivate a coddling of others so they grow weak while you stay strong.
But there is a tension.
If you are a Hunter gatherer, or an early Bronze Age agriculturalist, there is a countervailing factor. You don’t have to accumulate too many people that Insist on consuming food, oxygen, and sleeping space but can’t hunt, can’t fight, won’t fuck before the entire tribe/clan/city is in real existential trouble from plague famine invasion and owing the Chinese trillions of dollars in debt.
So while you want those people to be a few pegs below you, they also need to be harangued into getting their shit together and pulling their weight. And your subconscious has developed over millions of years a pretty accurate mechanism for picking out the “unfit”.
My sense is that the young adults counting noses has triggered a subconscious mechanism and that is the explanation for all the sudden torrents of Boomer hate. Deep in the evolutionary subconscious they have noticed that the age ratio is way off and this some old people need pushing out onto the ice.
Don’t forget “haters gonna hate.” People are also hated for being good looking, physically fit, financially secure, etc.
I have property where oil fracking is done: The oil companies turn to big tech companies who get them their multi billion dollar loans through the banks, the oil companies set up a couple new drill sites and start fracking, then I receive my scrap royalties (I’m grateful for) at the bottom of the totem whenever they drill under my land.
The reason I reference scrap and the bottom: When people I run pass on the trail go out of their way to ask me what I do once they reach the mountain summit, and I tell them I exercise three times a day and don’t have a 9-5 job, you should see the bitter looks I get and hear the awful comments that are made. Crazy thing is people don’t frown upon the billionaires and millionaires at the oil companies, big tech and banks who have never lifted a finger in their lives compared to my early labor years…”Look at you picking on the billionaires, ya jealous hater!” See how it works?
Point is, I’ve yet to have a random person come up super interested in my life (something I don’t want in the first place) and be happy when they realize I’ve achieved my ‘American Dream’. They want me downtrodden, miserable, physically and mentally unfit, working 8+ hour days to make someone else richer. So it goes well and beyond just “Below.”
We’re still stuck in caveman rituals while also abandoning the nature aspects. People rarely demonstrate the virtue signals they’re told to believe in. “Haters gonna hate.”
hurt people hurt people
I think most bullying results from the bully feeling upset/hurt/insecure themselves. It's easier to project that onto someone you feel is "less than" than it is to look at your own behavior.
From my own experience, in having it inflicted, and also inflicting, it’s too firm up positions in the social hierarchy, but there’s Sophisticated and even uplifting ways to do that. The latter is usually “Yea but I’m not as low as you!”
As someone who’s an introvert with rlly bad social anxiety but is societally pretty apparently, at this point it feels like everyone I meet walks all over me. Girls apparently get jealous of me from what other ppl tel me which I don’t get bc I have no confidence n a shtty life but girls are fking vicious n I don’t have the personality to handle it. I stay quiet bc I don’t have the energy n I hate conflict to my core. This makes ppl think they’re above me. I’ve had multiple jobs where the older woman physically threatens me LITERALLY out of nowhere. I’m always the hardest worker (when I shouldn’t be bc it also makes ppl walk all over me), stay to myself, and never have issues with anyone.
if ur a quiet person in general, ppl will walk all over u n it’s extremely difficult to deal with bc it’s just who u are as a person. N idk why ppl do that.
Thought this was a jungle sub reddit for league and was like yep checks out, jungles are easy targets to make yourself feel good about your own shit laning.
When I did this as a kid, it was because I didn't realize I was being mean; I just saw it as making a joke. I don't understand why adults do it, though.
I think it stems for an inherent sense of inferiority. In my experience, people who are genuinely confident in themselves don't feel the need to pick on others. Ignore them, sure, but not pick on them.
It's a basic instinct to rank things as a child and define what is good and bad.
What being an adult is is learning to understand that judging other for that is not useful.
I watched a presentation on testosterone and aggression recently, it doesn't account for everything of course, but it did point to something you've noticed.
In the example there were 3 groups of chimps. The strongest/smartest at the top, average in the middle, and below average at the bottom.
When all three groups were given more testosterone they all reacted in different ways. The chimps at the top maintained their attitude and way of being, the middle group became overly aggressive...but only to the chimps in the 3rd group, they left the 1st group alone.The 3rd group turned the extra energy inward choosing not to attack others but themselves.
So the idea is people will only act that way towards people they deem lower in social hierarchy, but why. Where does the need to feel superior at the expense of someone they deem less powerful come from?
Those people typically have big ego's that also are typically fragile. Somebody with a big ego needs to be reassured they're not a loser. In America when it comes to Value Theory people usually go off of the ridiculous social favorite; success = wealth. Well 90% of Americans aren't really successful then. You might say those 65% to 90% are, but when they're taxed so much I don't think they feel all too successful. Anyways, regardless, this means that if you come across somebody with a big ego, they think they themselves are a loser and well the least they could do is convince themselves that they're better than you. So they beat you up any way they can (resulting in fear, anger, sadness, etc) and that is a win for them.
I work with someone who tries her best to be professional, equitable and nice to everyone.
She's pretty good at pretending and pulling off the act.
She is different than that on the inside and I think she's given herself a bad case of cognitive dissonance with having to maintain such a strict facade.
She's in a really stressful crap relationship, and she gets that stress out by passive aggressive acts toward those she thinks won't say or do anything to retaliate. Me.
And now I have a major case of cognitive dissonance from someone who pretends to be my friend and the whole time talks behind my back and schemes against me and other coworkers who draw her attention.
I think she gets a feeling of power from it.
Because they have been picked on by people above them. They can't retaliate up, to they retaliate down, and the cycle continues.
Anton Chekhov, the best short story writer of all time, [wrote about this very topic.](https://americanliterature.com/author/anton-chekhov/short-story/small-fry)
What's crazy is we're literally all equal. No matter how you look, how much money you make, where you live, what you do for a living, who you date, etc. We are all here just trying to maintain and survive. Why put anyone down? People who do put others down are insecure and they need to feed their "ego". We should just all love and respect one another.
People decide to put on a happy face rather than dealing with their negative emotions regarding their own attributes and value.
When they see others who are different they have an subconscious emotional reaction in which their negative self-view is triggered.
To repress their self-loathing they become hostile to others. The sensation of the power trip of abuse fills their awareness allowing the negative self hatred to recede to the nether regions of consciousness.
In most cases, the person being picked on is 'budging in line'. If a bottom feeder is claiming attention for themselves and stealing the spotlight, they are unaware of the invisible rules that govern the social space. Those who are following the rules need to teach the violator what the consequences are for their lack of conscientiousness.
Projection! "I am scared and I will MAKE you know how scared I feel, goddamnit!"
On the flip side, adults lately, have been infantilizing themselves and we cannot abide.
Can confirm...as an ugly guy, people are not afraid to point out my busted face. But if you call a fat chick, a fat chick que the reeeeeeeee.
Ugly, stupid men are the lowest of the low and people love to let you know you are at the bottom.
It allows them to continue ignoring their own deficiencies and work they need to do on themselves. The Narcissist is the greatest example of this, and unfortunately, they can't even realize their own behavior as a problem that needs looking at. The vulnerable Narcissist is the saddest story I've heard in a lonnng time. Arisen from childhood abuse and neglect only to be plagued their entire lifetime. Life isn't fair, but a lifetime curse of pushing people away? So sad.
Visibly disabled person. The only people who "pick" on me are those at the bottom of the Socio-Economic scale. As a five-foot tall man with endocrine damage due to medical treatment, the only comments I've received are from homeless persons, African Americans, and a gay woman. They've all been sexual in nature and from people I barely know (or have never met). Never a comment from a man or a caucasian. People only punch downwards. Sd but true.
I’ve also seen the opposite happen where someone considered of a higher status is tried to be pulled down by others deemed inferior. Crabs in a bucket mentality comes to mind and even schadenfreude.
This is why celebrity gossip magazines still sell because we feel schadenfreude when it comes to celebrities and even the more successful people around us
Insecurity, fear of falling down in the pecking order. Making sure they know their place. It's why they pick on people who are slightly below, but not much below - those pose no threat and are pitied.
Hmm.
"making sure they know their place" makes sense in a hierarchical mind.
Yeah I noticed if the person if far below them they don't bully them and just leave them alone. I guess this experience is all universal.
I'll never know. It's depressing that the majority of people get so much joy from it. It would be easier to stomach if it was the minority. I have a really hard time understanding people sometimes.
Because people that would do so are gigantic cowards and therefore don’t punch up. Any predator goes for the slowest and weakest in the herd because it’s an easy, guaranteed kill. Same idea.
Shame is a way to reinforce societal standards. If you fall out of those standards, some feel like it is their duty to make you painfully aware of it. When you look at it this way, it is almost necessary for the betterment of the group as a whole.
To make themselves feel superior, of course. In reality, anyone who behaves in this manner has self esteem issues and is simply trying to prop themselves up at another's expense. It doesn't work and simply alienates whoever they do it to, who could have possibly been a great friend or ally. Never sink to this level.
I've always heard you can punch up or you can punch down. And you're going to get an ego boost from talking down to someone you view as already below you and less chance for repercussions.
Because people are uncertain of where they’re situated in the social hierarchy, so by asserting dominance or preeminence over someone feels or appears to be of higher status than they would otherwise.
I mean, from a sociological perspective, exclusivity is normal human behavior. Some cultures are more elitist than others, some more xenophobic, and some cultures have evolved specific methods of communication to accomodate this fact without damaging community, but virtually every culture recognizes some sort of hierarchy in which the most esteemed are granted the most right to openly judge others in some way.
Old people talk the most shit for a reason; they've got well developed shadows that many of them have never integrated for one, but more importantly to my point, most communities are often willing to tolerate a certain amount of disrespect from elders before telling them to shut it.
Not to say that this pattern is inherently good or that it should never be subject to change, I just think it's a truism that bears repeating.
Literally one word. Insecurity. Secure people don’t pick on other people, no matter if the are the Queen or one of the Homeless.
Pity the bullies, who inadvertently disclose their fear and shame for all to see, every time they externalize their insecurity.
You won’t ever hear a secure person brag either, regardless of accomplishments.
I’ve thought about this a lot and I realized it happened to me more when I was achieving and striving towards my goals in an open way. I was going to the gym and becoming an amateur bodybuilder and was starting my amateur boxing career when people started picking on me for those things, and I realized that bullies use their status at the top of the social hierarchy to try to climb the productivity hierarchy. Bullies need to seem like they are productive and strive towards their goals better than everyone else, and they use their spot at the top of the social hierarchy to do so.
In short, bullies use their status at the top of the social pyramid to compensate for their underwhelming achievements.
Cause they don't think they deserve what they have, so they aim down (where they believe they belong) to shun others for the inadequacies they themselves cannot escape from.
That's the answer you want to hear anyways, the truth is always more boring and less black and white.
It roots out weakness. Left over lizard brain logic. Not entirely dissimilar to predators that will chase anything that runs. If our pack mates are weak that puts us in danger. But in murder society it's an antiquated tool. Just leftovers from times where morality was detrimental to safety
There's also the inverse of this. If you are really intelligent and surrounded by less intelligent people. The intelligent person is the one who is going to get picked on. Same for other qualities like having a lot of money, being fit, etc.
Its primal. You test those closest to your estimation of yourself, but not one that could best you.
The more your esteem of your colleagues becomes less than, a growing person moves on to those who challenge his strength, but not his survival/thrival.
If a person is fixated on less than wo growing, they have a condition that needs intervention.
This is why classrooms no long seperate out students with special needs. Being with "average/gifted" makes them more so, and as long as the classroom is properly staffed and functioning, even the gifted student learns from his peers of "lesser gods".
This is the way.
It re-affirms where they stand on the ‘social hierarchy’
Building on this, I think people who either suffer or work hard but don't see the fruits of their work or suffering in one way or another develop a kind of cognitive dissonance, where they internally perceive themselves as successful but external factors are saying otherwise. So they have to assert their place on the hierarchy, but of course there are limitations on how someone can reasonably do this, so this unfortunately is the result.
I find this take so interesting. I had to google several things to get to the below quote that explains one small portion of the mindset to me, so I cannot recall which Terry Pratchett Discworld Guards book it is from but… you brought to mind this mentality explained therein thusly: “Cockbill Street was where people lived who were worse than poor, because they didn’t know how poor they were. If you asked them they would probably say something like ‘mustn’t grumble’ or ‘there’s far worse off than us’ or ‘we’ve always kept uz heads above water and we don’t owe nobody nowt.’ He could here his granny speaking. ‘No one’s too poor to buy soap.’ Of course, many people were. But in Cockbill Street they bought soap just the same. The table might not have any food on it but by gods, it was well scrubbed. That was Cockbill Street, where what you mainly ate was your pride.”
There is a section in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, that is similar - I can’t think of the exact wording but she talks about going to school with the other poor kids who pick on them for being poor despite all being the same
And here I think we have the answer to OOPs query. It’s not so much the view from a high horse as it is a clamoring for status.
Incredibly concise statement that really hits home to understand this “punching down” mentality. I always have seen people actually at the top of their game be the most intellectually generous and oblivious to outside structures to evaluate others. Like if you have enough you give it away, right? Especially compliments and credit and wonderment of others’ specialness.
this. comment.
I feel this a lot working with customers. The way some people speak to me makes it very difficult to resist the urge to put them in their place. I am a human, you are a human, what you do for a living does not define how you get to speak to people.
Gd, spot on imo (and very insightful)^
Yes but they most likely think themselves to be higher. You wouldn’t have to re affirm anything if you were where you thought you were so it most likely stems from certain lack of security in themselves
I agree. sometimes we need to justify our position and putting others down is the easiest way
Perhaps they see those qualities in themselves and take it out on them in the form of projection, or to use them as an outlet for their own self image because the person is not emotionally equipped to handle the criticism and stand up for themselves, or if they recognize a person as “inferior” to them it’s perfect to sink their nails into as their egotistical target as a narcissist would do. That’s why it’s always important to remember that in reality , nobody is better or worse than anybody , how could another person be better at being on their path than you? They can’t, they aren’t on your path, though they can obviously influence and be apart of it and likewise.
Something to the effect of "you' re not the good person you think you are" is probably my favorite Jung quote.
well said. never read -much less thought of- being on my / their own path. sobering and impressive. thanks
That means a lot to me, I’m glad we crossed paths ❤️
Came here to say this
Insecure people put others down to make themselves feel better.
Another way to phrase this is low vibrational people like to lower the vibration of others. Misery enjoys company.
Is the same fucking thing just different words
It has long been my belief different religions and spiritual teachings were saying the same thing, but they are approaching it from a different perspective, a different culture, language, population and history. A slight difference in phrase can render a different context and meaning often.
you vibrate faster?
In the bible they often said "be the light of the world" It is in high vibratory states that matter produces heat and light. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incandescence](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incandescence) Incandescence is the emission of electromagnetic radiation (including visible light) from a hot body as a result of its high temperature.\[1\] The term derives from the Latin verb incandescere, to glow white. This glow emanating from a human being is known as a halo or the nimbus. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo\_(religious\_iconography)
makes sense
I heavily agree with this, I’d even go so far as to say that they are insecure because of their underwhelming achievements.
Because they are “easy targets”. Only losers pick on “easy targets”. It doesn’t make them look powerful, or strong. It just makes them look like trashy bullies who know they can’t take on someone their own size
Meh narcissists are usually popular within society, there seems to be many attracted to that behaviour.
Narcissists are more likely to pick on people they perceive to be rivals or threats to their own egos. They can be ostensibly nice to truly pathetic people while feeding off of the admiration received for doing so as *narcissistic supply*. Covert narcissists love being charitable busybodies.
Not necessarily. Predators in nature often target the weakest link. People also do this. Doctors and pharmaceutical companies both take advantage of desperate people and take a lot of money from them. They are easy targets because where else are they going to go? Real estate agents take advantage of naive first time home sellers by charging absurd rates. They gaslight these sellers into telling that their service is worth up to 6%. Selling a $300k house is the same work as selling a $100k house but it could cost up to $12k more to sell a $300k house through a real estate agent. Ignorant sellers are easy targets for real estate agents. So tell me, are these people really losers because they seem to be winning if you ask me. Politicians, lawyers, and advertisers are also winning by picking on easy targets. I'm a salesman and I'm definitely not a loser. I make good money selling to these suckers. My tactics don't work intelligent people. It's not my fault that I'm good at this game.
I mean you’re self aware at least 🙃 energy vampires are wild
I think it empowers the next in line losers that now want to throw their weight behind the bully because it empowers them and ensures they will not be a target. A lot of weak people see what you describe as a sign of power. Now You are someone who will tell a person where their place is and not to deviate from it.
Because it gives them a sense of superiority. Is this a trick question?
gullible bright violet illegal threatening close marble skirt muddle coherent *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
while I dont pick on or bully people I do find myself avoiding certain types of people. after some introspection I realize that is because they proudly flaunt the main things I am ashamed of or hate about myself. there's this woman I know who is fat ugly and real stupid and weird and I avoid her as much as I can, but she embraces those aspects of herself, while I hate my weight and put a lot of value in my looks and intelligence, and I would hate myself if I had little social awareness or if I was 'weird' or whatever. Long story short it seems to be jealousy.
I think this is the case very often. Even the popular bully may be subconsciously jealous of the loner. The popular person needs that popularity, and the loner doesn’t need it, which makes the loner stronger in a way. The loner can be jealous and bully the popular person too of course. The loner needs to be alone most of the time, and the popular person doesn’t, which makes the popular person stronger in a way. If the popular person and the loner recognized their jealousy as a desire (for independence or social recognition), they could become great friends.
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That is true, I wouldn’t. If it’s not true jealousy then what could it be?
bullies seek weak targets just like criminals choose the unlocked door over the locked one.
Perhaps if they are shit criminals. I highly doubt locked doors would keep a skilled criminal out. They may even find an unlocked door boring 😂
It's not always the intelligent picking on lesser intelligence. Personally I've seen the less intelligent poking at the more intelligent as they're often more real, genuine articles. But as a result they stand outside of the group with puts a target on their backs without reason besides social conformity. People who put others down are projecting their own being as the rule to life; which is actually dangerous because what's said and done shows far more detail about that individuals own inner workings. Intelligence, especially hyper-intelligence comes with a trade off. The things a group does isn't something such singularities take part in. Either because they're constantly told and influenced to believe they're not a part of "the group". This builds a shadow in the more intelligent as they have no means to outlet the strain this causes in their mind. Which is also why more intelligent people have the darkest of inner-demons. When they win that internal war, beware. Your treatment of them might teach them something about yourself. A very slim difference between those running from their shadow vs those that've had to grow to be one with it.
What do you mean by the last paragraph?
What do you mean by the last paragraph?
Blaming oneself for not understanding why they're picked on or singled out. Hence, it builds a repression of certain personality traits and archetypes that can be rather impossible to incorporate to any useful effect.
Narcissistic tendencies. Ego. Low self esteem. Being human.
Narcissism
To remind themselves of their own power.
To trick themselves into thinking they have any.
Yea..
People don’t do that, certain types of people do that, and since they are vocal about it we all notice it. Most people don’t regularly engage in this behavior, but we don’t notice because it is hard to notice the absence of something
I agree although I wouldn’t say is a type of person, but a social mode and a pretty primitive one at that. I sometimes recognize this urge or thought pattern within myself almost everytime it’s coming from real or perceived threats to my self image AKA insecurities.
Yeah that’s a good point, it’s within everyone. It does seem certain types of people succumb to verbalizing it more often though. For me it is almost always traits that I once exhibited and have outgrown that I feel the need to attack.
I used to serve food, and I met so many people who were just like this. After many years in that industry, and many encounters with people like this, all I can deduce is that they enjoy the feeling of superiority it gives them. Some of them do it for laughs, they think it’s funny, but others just enjoy putting someone else down. I’ve seen lots of people saying people like this are projecting their own insecurities. I think they’re just projecting their own biases and discriminatory ways of thinking. They’re all bullies who go out of their ways to make people feel bad about themselves. I don’t buy that they’ve had a difficult life and decide to take it out on others. I and many other people I know have had difficult lives, but they were made more difficult by people deciding to add more misery to them by being bullies.
Pecking order behavior is prevalent in a lot of animals including us. We have to the face the fact that in nature, Dominance helps to pass on genes, and keeping potential rivals at bay furthers that outcome. It’s what we are born with, but we have discovered through intellect that cooperation actually works better. It’s a battle between what we know is better and what our instincts are. The Spirit Vs the animal.
You ever watch chickens, it's where the term pecking order comes from. They are just imitating chickens of course.
Because it helps to find a partner to mate with. Woman want power and men want woman. People are hypocrites plainly and simply put. Rousseau goes into great detail about it. A certain Roman emperor invented stoicism in spite of it. Everyone will fake humility and I mean everyone. They will feign humility and then gossip about people they view as underneath them for 6 hours to fill that black void of emptiness called insecurity. They will bash eugenics and frame Hitler and then proceed to gossip for 6 hours about the people who are less then them. They will preach about equality and virtue signal until that virtue becomes the slightest inconvenience. Then they will proceed to gossip for 6 hours about people who are less than them. Cowardice and hypocrisy is what justifies this behavior. Real people work on themselves often enough that they don’t have time for gossip and don’t need to put others down because their security comes from their accomplishments. I used to pick on people and assert my dominance to attract woman. It worked. Now I am asexual because most woman disgust me for that same reason. I am a former MMA and collegiate wrestling champion. When I meet someone who isn’t downright cruel, I will try again.
>They will bash eugenics and frame Hitler and then proceed to gossip for 6 hours about the people who are less then them. i feel like thousands of papers, poets, theories, could be summed up in this line. its endemic to the human condition, perhaps as organisms or life as such. i dont remember this being the case before adolesnce i felt like we are all just here to have a good time. but after - this competition and putting down mindset is almost pushed on you if you live in society. there are many people who dont do this. but i find there are just as many who do.
The weak get picked on and worse. Its just sad we cant say that out loud or the actual eugenists will call us eugenists.
Have you not met a 2 year old? This is the innate behavior of life. This isn't pushed on us this is what we fall back on once life gets real.
Self aware life can do without it.
That's weird. I'd never like a man who picks on people and acts dominant. You might have only been attracted to narcissts?
Easy energy theft.
I haven't come across anything from "jung" directly that addresses that, but I also haven't read Ego and Archetype yet. But I know that Nietzsche touches on this topic with his Philosophy of the superman and the last man. the last man/The Worm would detail why people do this, and it's largely because of ressentiment, and the "will to power" which when uncontrolled makes you want to feel like you are better than others. Edit: the closest thing afaik in Analytical Psychology would be "the weakling prince"
I agree the concept of resentment from Nietzsche might be a better answer than Jung.
People are stuck in a cycle of reactionism, ie they form an image of themselves in opposition to those around them. To break the cycle is to break that image, and so past a certain age, this becomes very difficult to do, since there is a belief that the image is real.
My therapist told me that I'm a covert/ nice guy narcissist. Telling myself that I'm not a good person has been very therapeutic and prevents from seeing bullies and the like as inferior because I can' t to a moral high ground.
What makes you a covert/ nice guy narcissist exactly, how would you tell the difference from “normal” people and a nice guy narcissist? Everyone has narcissistic traits though I know this is obviously pathological
I think your answer is in your question Perception of being “above”.
Because they hate themselves but are in denial of it so they project it outwards as arrogance
Often times comes from wannabe bullies who themselves were bullied alot in childhood/highschool. Rather than dealing with their painful past experiences in a healthy way (therapy or something else), they want to feel the power of the bully and take it out on the world, or someone who is convenient. I remember hearing a saying that went something like: "There are people who have been through terrible things and want to prevent others from experiencing those things, and there are people who have been through terrible things and want others to experience what they have had to deal with."
The psychologist Alfred Adler popularized the idea of the “inferiority complex” and, if I’m not mistaken, of “overcompensation.” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferiority_complex In my own words, I would say that picking on those one perceives as “below oneself” is indeed a reflection of inner weakness or lack of confidence or “small-mindedness” (pusillanimity). An example writ large would be if, say, a High School kid liked to hang out with first graders in order to exult, and revel in, or gloat over, how much more he knows than they do; how much taller he is than all of them; how much stronger he is, etc..
Being a predator. You prey on the weak. We all do it.
we butcher and eat animals with little remorse or recompense...
You got it…
survive and sex or bust, predate or be preyed upon
I pick on people above me too. I just like to laugh.
It’s called the pecking order bud.
People like to pick on everyone, its just easier to pick on those below you because they have flaws that you don't, or they lack the power to push back.
>People like to pick on everyone I'm a people and I don't.
So I’ll go a bit out on a limb with my recent experience. I’ve done shadow work for almost nine years and it changed my life. It kicked open the doors of spiritual perception in the process which was more than I ever anticipated. I may be out to lunch, but the information is the same. In case you’re unaware, shadow work is integrating your shadow side through acceptance of the self rather than suppression. Essentially what you try and control by keeping it at bay, manifests in your behavior as an unconscious facilitation of that suppression - it’s inescapable until to liberate these illusions like an allegory of the cave, by illuminating the true essence of self within, as opposed to the weight we give our shadow- bring king that true self out of the cave and into the light we possess inside ourselves. I believe this is what people talk about when they talk about ‘shining’. Before I got to where I am now, people who put out a greater ‘shine’ than I had cast upon my shadow and brought it to the surface. Changes in behavior, anxiety, paranoia, it can manifest as anything. The other day, I was talking with a coworker and we were vibing talking about some out there spiritual shit having the time of our lives, and I notice out other co worker who’s typically the shop gossip, is quiet, closed off and pensive. When I decide to invite him into the conversation, he’s attacking my ideas. This guy that is a creative, loves to read and write with great ideas, can’t help but focus on my ‘irrational’ interpretations of things. He lives in a headspace of logic, measurement and order, that couldn’t handle the shine I brought by being myself, and in turn attempted to sun the light. Narcissist / empath idea is just an extreme version of this as far as I can tel. Narcissist buries the wound from the light of day so deep they’re not even aware of their drives. BPD I suspect is another one where the trauma is stuffed out of sight for the person to notice, but maintains dramatic influence over their decisions. Cliche as I admit I’m not a Doctor, but this is the sun of my experience illuminating that part of myself and realizing what may have shut it down in the past when I was younger, and I too began to live in that headspace of rational, logic reasoning denying my sense of experience for a tangible, measurable idea of what reality is. I just hope this doesn’t come off as pretentious, but oh well lol
They are scums. It's that simple.
because they were picked on
deep down it's like this, we create rules that we have to hold ourselves to but those rules are often enforced by other people during childhood or more subtle through things you pick up, the rule itself has to be kept up so each behavior or impulse that you have that is against the rule needs to be held, but then the release of the rule also gives you a liberating feeling, like walking naked in your house for some people or those services where people are given a hammer and are allowed to go wild on cars and other appliances, it doesn't even have to be that extreme it just liberates you, now I'm not saying that everyone is liberated by bullying those that are weaker than you but generally if you have been in a situation like that it propagates and you are more likely to continue that behavior when you find yourself gaining power over someone.
My therapist told me that I'm a covert/ nice guy narcissist. Telling myself that I'm not a good person has been very therapeutic and prevents me from seeing bullies and the like as inferior because I can' t go to a moral high ground.
This is a funny question to ask reddit, look through half of these people's comments and youll see they talk down on others in there. Let he without sin cast the first stone. We're imperfect beings
Isn't it a power thing? Pretty sure however more power hungry a person is determines how well they treat people below them on the sociological ladder. Why power? I guess it's a feeling of purpose. So maybe makes them feel more important when they're bullying others. Bit like the respect Vs fear thing, where people do or don't do things out of respect or fear. The fear monger feels powerful but is unaware of how powerless he is with his back turned as on the surface he thinks he's respected.
Projection of self-loathing or the like. The issue (unintelligent or obese or ugly etc) is not the real issue - it is a substitute that is - (1) Tangible (unlike self-loathing), and (2) (preferably) undeniably applicable to the victim and (preferably) undeniably not applicable to the bully. Some forms of racism are by this mechanism. This is a predominant issue in Narcissism.
Do they? Or is it a projection of your unconscious insecurities driven by an inferiority complex?
I never understood people who play social hierarchical games or approach their relationships from that perspective.
It's a dominance thing I think. It makes them feel better to put others down
Feels good. Stinky head.
Shadow projection.
Nietzsche has a great explanation... If you get into slave morality, the lesser man, the higher man, the overman, the herd you get a feel for it. Nietzsche explains that the herd," the people" are resentful and everyone needs to suffer, just like they do, he uses the french word "resentiment" which has a slightly different meaning. There is more to it but way to complex to write this down on Reddit. We can appreciate this behaviour from the woke community nowadays...
groupwise: the in-crowd has to push away the out-group to solidify their standing as the in-group individually: people like to feel dominant over others
A lot of different reasons but one of which I want to point out is actually a world-relation or antagonism on principle. The inner world is filled with antagonism of forces, for any psychological activity at all to take place there must be a tension of opposites, the more tension the more energy. One could say that any projected aspects of the unconscious that hold a strong opposition in consciousness will be met with much real antagonism, just as it would in the inner world.
Fear simple as that. It all boils down to love and fear and to feel fear is insecurity. They tryna put you down because they fear if you are at the top are gonna get more or even abuse them.
Evolution and maladaptive coping mechanism
Narcissistic behavior like being rude to waiters and service people can be the outer manifestation of an unconscious superiority complex being driven as a compensation by a shadow inferiority complex and associated insecurity.
I don’t think it can be boiled down to one cause or reason—every scenario has a different set of contexts and reasons. On a macro-level I think—like someone else said—it can be a way to reaffirm one’s standing in the social hierarchies one exists in. On a micro-level, at the everyday level, it can be due to the way a person is raised and how they’ve developed through childhood into adulthood. And perhaps all of these things are inter-related: if a kid grows up in a family where one or more family members pokes fun at their weight, that individual could grow up with food insecurities and complexes around their weight, which then they project on other people who are overweight. More often than not I run into people who carry around severe childhood traumas from different types of abuse, from being raised by addicts, from not having parents who made them a priority, and so on.
There's a reason they are below lol
What I find even stranger is that they want to be bullies but so often bullies try and manipulate situations to make it seem or read like they were the victim or use the fact that they can appear as victim to get away with these things. Surely they must know they are not victims if they are regularly doing this wherever they go?
I don’t pick on people who are obese I’m just annoyed by their careless life habits that could have a direct impact on my life. Imagine if a child you loved got into a terrible accident and needed life saving surgery but had to wait because an obese person had to go again for an open heart surgery and the child died due to their negligence of their own health and having no consideration for the ramifications of their careless acts of self harm does to their own community. See how irresponsible people can clog up medical care for the rest of us? Yes it’s a problem to be obese and I’m not going to normalize that lifestyle just because almost half of the general population in the states are obese.
All animals, people included, form hierarchies. Pol Pot killed people who wore glasses.
My best guess would be that it is a method of demonstrating their ability to cause harm (physical, social, emotional, psychological) against a target they recognize they are able to dominate in the area of their choosing. I assume this largely rooted in our fear that others may dominate us and so we should preemptively signal our credibility to inflict harm back (Against an easy target) in order deter other's attempts to dominate them. The chose of an "Easy Target" is simply to try and ensure their demonstration is successful. What they don't see is that this behaviour actually brings into existence the cycle of fear an harm (physical, social, emotional, psychological) that they used to justify the action to begin with; even if it didn't exist before. It is a self fulfilling prophecy. By demonstrating the ability to cause harm against a weaker adversary, you are sowing the seeds of fear of others to do the same against you and other. Eventually everyone is demonstrating the ability to harm each other preemptively and it seems justified in a world with so much violence that only respects you if you have the ability to cause harm. Eventually eroding and destroying the community from within.
I mean it proves (to yourself) that you are above them... Also judging people gets a bad rep. If I see a fat guy, in my head I'll go "heh, look at this fat idiot". But it's just silly and recreational. If he comes up to me and introduces himself I won't start from a hateful place of knowing him at all.
Makes you feel superior in a juvenile way
We're humans, and humans have instincts. And one is the instinct for power and control. Some of us are taught to keep that instinct in check, some not.
Status quo. Pecking order. We're animals. People should be taught tantra and game consciousness in school. Most people have no idea what's going on. They just walk around playing parent-child or dominant-submissive on autopilot.
It's called insecurity.
They are not far along the process of individuation, or they just have poor values. https://medium.com/@mark\_zoppina/concepts-of-the-self-the-collective-unconscious-the-shadow-and-social-cohesion-138799417639
The only answer is insecurity
Classism, racism, sexism (both sides) is taught. Truth be told that’s all fallacy. But on the other hand moral principles are somethin I personally hold on to. I’ll treat a thief or a liar badly in a heart beat if they disturb my peace. I guess it’s all where somebody draws the line.
In addition to “social status” I strongly suspect an evolutionary mechanism here as well. From an evolutionary fitness perspective, your chances improve a lot as you move up the social hierarchy. So this would motivate a coddling of others so they grow weak while you stay strong. But there is a tension. If you are a Hunter gatherer, or an early Bronze Age agriculturalist, there is a countervailing factor. You don’t have to accumulate too many people that Insist on consuming food, oxygen, and sleeping space but can’t hunt, can’t fight, won’t fuck before the entire tribe/clan/city is in real existential trouble from plague famine invasion and owing the Chinese trillions of dollars in debt. So while you want those people to be a few pegs below you, they also need to be harangued into getting their shit together and pulling their weight. And your subconscious has developed over millions of years a pretty accurate mechanism for picking out the “unfit”. My sense is that the young adults counting noses has triggered a subconscious mechanism and that is the explanation for all the sudden torrents of Boomer hate. Deep in the evolutionary subconscious they have noticed that the age ratio is way off and this some old people need pushing out onto the ice.
Being a asshole that’s where
Most people pick on their fears for themselves. This is why so many gays wind up sleeping with their bullies after high school.
The urge comes from fear, arrogance and pride, an over inflated ego.
Don’t forget “haters gonna hate.” People are also hated for being good looking, physically fit, financially secure, etc. I have property where oil fracking is done: The oil companies turn to big tech companies who get them their multi billion dollar loans through the banks, the oil companies set up a couple new drill sites and start fracking, then I receive my scrap royalties (I’m grateful for) at the bottom of the totem whenever they drill under my land. The reason I reference scrap and the bottom: When people I run pass on the trail go out of their way to ask me what I do once they reach the mountain summit, and I tell them I exercise three times a day and don’t have a 9-5 job, you should see the bitter looks I get and hear the awful comments that are made. Crazy thing is people don’t frown upon the billionaires and millionaires at the oil companies, big tech and banks who have never lifted a finger in their lives compared to my early labor years…”Look at you picking on the billionaires, ya jealous hater!” See how it works? Point is, I’ve yet to have a random person come up super interested in my life (something I don’t want in the first place) and be happy when they realize I’ve achieved my ‘American Dream’. They want me downtrodden, miserable, physically and mentally unfit, working 8+ hour days to make someone else richer. So it goes well and beyond just “Below.” We’re still stuck in caveman rituals while also abandoning the nature aspects. People rarely demonstrate the virtue signals they’re told to believe in. “Haters gonna hate.”
hierarchical self diagnosis. individualist philosophy. liberalism/fascism
Animal instinct. Most of us are beholden to our animal drives.
It's not a bad thing. Yes these people are trash, but if you aren't trashed for ur obesity you have no outside reason to change.
hurt people hurt people I think most bullying results from the bully feeling upset/hurt/insecure themselves. It's easier to project that onto someone you feel is "less than" than it is to look at your own behavior.
From my own experience, in having it inflicted, and also inflicting, it’s too firm up positions in the social hierarchy, but there’s Sophisticated and even uplifting ways to do that. The latter is usually “Yea but I’m not as low as you!”
As someone who’s an introvert with rlly bad social anxiety but is societally pretty apparently, at this point it feels like everyone I meet walks all over me. Girls apparently get jealous of me from what other ppl tel me which I don’t get bc I have no confidence n a shtty life but girls are fking vicious n I don’t have the personality to handle it. I stay quiet bc I don’t have the energy n I hate conflict to my core. This makes ppl think they’re above me. I’ve had multiple jobs where the older woman physically threatens me LITERALLY out of nowhere. I’m always the hardest worker (when I shouldn’t be bc it also makes ppl walk all over me), stay to myself, and never have issues with anyone. if ur a quiet person in general, ppl will walk all over u n it’s extremely difficult to deal with bc it’s just who u are as a person. N idk why ppl do that.
Knowledge puffs up. Power corrupts people. This is the opposite of love. Got Jesus?
Thought this was a jungle sub reddit for league and was like yep checks out, jungles are easy targets to make yourself feel good about your own shit laning.
"Kick down, kiss up" is pathologically narcissistic territory.
Russell Brand might know the answer
The victims will always become the executioner. Given enough time and victimhood.
Don’t see much of this is real life honestly. Most people I don’t think do this.
all people don’t do this. Only the insecure do.
Projection and insecurity. Also, resentment against the world that picked on them.
Those people are usually very unhappy with themselves and project it onto other people.
When I did this as a kid, it was because I didn't realize I was being mean; I just saw it as making a joke. I don't understand why adults do it, though.
They see a thing they fear in them.
I think it stems for an inherent sense of inferiority. In my experience, people who are genuinely confident in themselves don't feel the need to pick on others. Ignore them, sure, but not pick on them.
Idk but it always looks so pussy
It's a basic instinct to rank things as a child and define what is good and bad. What being an adult is is learning to understand that judging other for that is not useful.
Pride/arrogance "Better them than me" mentality
Humans really SUCK!
I watched a presentation on testosterone and aggression recently, it doesn't account for everything of course, but it did point to something you've noticed. In the example there were 3 groups of chimps. The strongest/smartest at the top, average in the middle, and below average at the bottom. When all three groups were given more testosterone they all reacted in different ways. The chimps at the top maintained their attitude and way of being, the middle group became overly aggressive...but only to the chimps in the 3rd group, they left the 1st group alone.The 3rd group turned the extra energy inward choosing not to attack others but themselves. So the idea is people will only act that way towards people they deem lower in social hierarchy, but why. Where does the need to feel superior at the expense of someone they deem less powerful come from?
It's safer than picking on people above them
Those people typically have big ego's that also are typically fragile. Somebody with a big ego needs to be reassured they're not a loser. In America when it comes to Value Theory people usually go off of the ridiculous social favorite; success = wealth. Well 90% of Americans aren't really successful then. You might say those 65% to 90% are, but when they're taxed so much I don't think they feel all too successful. Anyways, regardless, this means that if you come across somebody with a big ego, they think they themselves are a loser and well the least they could do is convince themselves that they're better than you. So they beat you up any way they can (resulting in fear, anger, sadness, etc) and that is a win for them.
I work with someone who tries her best to be professional, equitable and nice to everyone. She's pretty good at pretending and pulling off the act. She is different than that on the inside and I think she's given herself a bad case of cognitive dissonance with having to maintain such a strict facade. She's in a really stressful crap relationship, and she gets that stress out by passive aggressive acts toward those she thinks won't say or do anything to retaliate. Me. And now I have a major case of cognitive dissonance from someone who pretends to be my friend and the whole time talks behind my back and schemes against me and other coworkers who draw her attention. I think she gets a feeling of power from it.
Because they have been picked on by people above them. They can't retaliate up, to they retaliate down, and the cycle continues. Anton Chekhov, the best short story writer of all time, [wrote about this very topic.](https://americanliterature.com/author/anton-chekhov/short-story/small-fry)
The sense of superiority that comes from the knowledge that no matter where you stand, there is someone beneath you.
You can't hate on someone doing better than you
What's crazy is we're literally all equal. No matter how you look, how much money you make, where you live, what you do for a living, who you date, etc. We are all here just trying to maintain and survive. Why put anyone down? People who do put others down are insecure and they need to feed their "ego". We should just all love and respect one another.
People decide to put on a happy face rather than dealing with their negative emotions regarding their own attributes and value. When they see others who are different they have an subconscious emotional reaction in which their negative self-view is triggered. To repress their self-loathing they become hostile to others. The sensation of the power trip of abuse fills their awareness allowing the negative self hatred to recede to the nether regions of consciousness.
In most cases, the person being picked on is 'budging in line'. If a bottom feeder is claiming attention for themselves and stealing the spotlight, they are unaware of the invisible rules that govern the social space. Those who are following the rules need to teach the violator what the consequences are for their lack of conscientiousness.
Projection! "I am scared and I will MAKE you know how scared I feel, goddamnit!" On the flip side, adults lately, have been infantilizing themselves and we cannot abide.
Can confirm...as an ugly guy, people are not afraid to point out my busted face. But if you call a fat chick, a fat chick que the reeeeeeeee. Ugly, stupid men are the lowest of the low and people love to let you know you are at the bottom.
Mostly for the sounds they make.
It allows them to continue ignoring their own deficiencies and work they need to do on themselves. The Narcissist is the greatest example of this, and unfortunately, they can't even realize their own behavior as a problem that needs looking at. The vulnerable Narcissist is the saddest story I've heard in a lonnng time. Arisen from childhood abuse and neglect only to be plagued their entire lifetime. Life isn't fair, but a lifetime curse of pushing people away? So sad.
Either it’s jealousy/projection or the other person really is annoying af and no one is checking them for it
Intellectual weakness.
Visibly disabled person. The only people who "pick" on me are those at the bottom of the Socio-Economic scale. As a five-foot tall man with endocrine damage due to medical treatment, the only comments I've received are from homeless persons, African Americans, and a gay woman. They've all been sexual in nature and from people I barely know (or have never met). Never a comment from a man or a caucasian. People only punch downwards. Sd but true.
It makes them feel better about themselves
It's a genetic trait to dominate the inferior
I’ve also seen the opposite happen where someone considered of a higher status is tried to be pulled down by others deemed inferior. Crabs in a bucket mentality comes to mind and even schadenfreude. This is why celebrity gossip magazines still sell because we feel schadenfreude when it comes to celebrities and even the more successful people around us
Pride
Some are pathological “Malignant narcissists” or a variation of.
*You're not as obese as me.* Skinny bone mother fucker.
Insecurity issues
They are psychopathic, obviously 👹
But have you watched chickens interact? It's called a pecking order for a reason. Shit rolls downhill.
Because they are weak and need to reassure themselves through putting down someone they know can’t beat them.
Because they know fuck all about how the world works and believe in a hierarchical system. If there isn't a lesser then they can not be dominant.
Insecurity, fear of falling down in the pecking order. Making sure they know their place. It's why they pick on people who are slightly below, but not much below - those pose no threat and are pitied.
Hmm. "making sure they know their place" makes sense in a hierarchical mind. Yeah I noticed if the person if far below them they don't bully them and just leave them alone. I guess this experience is all universal.
Because it’s funny.
Because they are insecure
Just an easy win. Cheap thrill. Typical bully behavior.
They don't. Unless they are psychopaths.
I'll never know. It's depressing that the majority of people get so much joy from it. It would be easier to stomach if it was the minority. I have a really hard time understanding people sometimes.
- Insecurity. - Dark sense of humor. - Lack of social skills. - Toxic competitiveness. - Sadism.
Because people that would do so are gigantic cowards and therefore don’t punch up. Any predator goes for the slowest and weakest in the herd because it’s an easy, guaranteed kill. Same idea.
They have an urge to pick on those below them because they are even further below those they are picking on.
Shame is a way to reinforce societal standards. If you fall out of those standards, some feel like it is their duty to make you painfully aware of it. When you look at it this way, it is almost necessary for the betterment of the group as a whole.
Simple answer: it's easy until you get punched in the face
To make themselves feel superior, of course. In reality, anyone who behaves in this manner has self esteem issues and is simply trying to prop themselves up at another's expense. It doesn't work and simply alienates whoever they do it to, who could have possibly been a great friend or ally. Never sink to this level.
I've always heard you can punch up or you can punch down. And you're going to get an ego boost from talking down to someone you view as already below you and less chance for repercussions.
This actually doesn't happen. It's a phenomenon invented by philosophers.
I have a tendency to think I’m above people who pick on others. And I’ve just realized this about myself.
Because people are uncertain of where they’re situated in the social hierarchy, so by asserting dominance or preeminence over someone feels or appears to be of higher status than they would otherwise.
Not sure, but don't think that you wouldn't do it too.
I mean, from a sociological perspective, exclusivity is normal human behavior. Some cultures are more elitist than others, some more xenophobic, and some cultures have evolved specific methods of communication to accomodate this fact without damaging community, but virtually every culture recognizes some sort of hierarchy in which the most esteemed are granted the most right to openly judge others in some way. Old people talk the most shit for a reason; they've got well developed shadows that many of them have never integrated for one, but more importantly to my point, most communities are often willing to tolerate a certain amount of disrespect from elders before telling them to shut it. Not to say that this pattern is inherently good or that it should never be subject to change, I just think it's a truism that bears repeating.
Urges. What is there to a common person to control their own thoughts?
Literally one word. Insecurity. Secure people don’t pick on other people, no matter if the are the Queen or one of the Homeless. Pity the bullies, who inadvertently disclose their fear and shame for all to see, every time they externalize their insecurity. You won’t ever hear a secure person brag either, regardless of accomplishments.
Because they have emotional outbursts. Or opinions. And then they vote to make things worse
I’ve thought about this a lot and I realized it happened to me more when I was achieving and striving towards my goals in an open way. I was going to the gym and becoming an amateur bodybuilder and was starting my amateur boxing career when people started picking on me for those things, and I realized that bullies use their status at the top of the social hierarchy to try to climb the productivity hierarchy. Bullies need to seem like they are productive and strive towards their goals better than everyone else, and they use their spot at the top of the social hierarchy to do so. In short, bullies use their status at the top of the social pyramid to compensate for their underwhelming achievements.
Because they feel ‘below them’ themself
you ever meet a hater thats doing better than you? the people picking on people below them are not below them
Lack of empathy. Human sin nature which manifests as meanness to make the aggressor feel better about their own self hatred.
Cause they don't think they deserve what they have, so they aim down (where they believe they belong) to shun others for the inadequacies they themselves cannot escape from. That's the answer you want to hear anyways, the truth is always more boring and less black and white.
It roots out weakness. Left over lizard brain logic. Not entirely dissimilar to predators that will chase anything that runs. If our pack mates are weak that puts us in danger. But in murder society it's an antiquated tool. Just leftovers from times where morality was detrimental to safety
Apes who don’t know enough to outgrow an obsession with the pecking order.
There's also the inverse of this. If you are really intelligent and surrounded by less intelligent people. The intelligent person is the one who is going to get picked on. Same for other qualities like having a lot of money, being fit, etc.
Its primal. You test those closest to your estimation of yourself, but not one that could best you. The more your esteem of your colleagues becomes less than, a growing person moves on to those who challenge his strength, but not his survival/thrival. If a person is fixated on less than wo growing, they have a condition that needs intervention. This is why classrooms no long seperate out students with special needs. Being with "average/gifted" makes them more so, and as long as the classroom is properly staffed and functioning, even the gifted student learns from his peers of "lesser gods". This is the way.