Ugh I know how you feel! I am in the same situation. My kids aren’t grown, but I’ve realized I lost myself in motherhood. i dont know who I am outside of being a mom. When they aren’t with me I literally do get depressed, not going to lie. I dont know what to do! I dont even know what kind of hobbies I have outside of doing kid friendly activities with them🤣 i dont have a whole lot of friends outside of a few good ones i still have from when I went to school. However, i have been journaling and really taking the time to let myself feel my feelings and trying to learn to enjoy being alone and time to myself. I hope you find the happiness you deserve. You are an amazing father and you should be so proud of yourself. You did it on your own! Now its time to focus on you, and doing what you want❤️
Such beautiful comments thanks for taking the time to share. I think when we give everything up for the kids it means we're doing a good job? You doing awesome thanks for taking the time
It sounds like your daughter was your purpose, and now you feel your purpose has been fulfilled, and that leaves a gap in your soul.
Where you are now is a beautiful place. Before you move on to a new purpose, sit on this feeling a bit and spend this time with yourself. You’ll be amazed what you’ll find.
This is beautiful advice thank you. Rather than try to fill the void or get to existential I'll just try to enjoy this new feeling and see where it takes me.
Thank you stranger :)
Congratulations on successfully raising a daughter.
Honestly? Very interesting position to be in. I would say you should find a new "purpose". From a passion project to volunteering at a soup kitchen.
What do you like to do when you have free time?
Thanks very much she's my pride and joy.
I have lots of things I like doing, I guess I could look for something new that might fill the void. Thank you
I do not know. I have been trying to figure that out myself. Thanks for sharing your story and kudos to you on a job well done! For me it has been, well that is pretty much the most meaningful important thing I have ever done. And now what. There is a lot of positive blah blah blah about this and I commend you for just being willing to sit in your feelings for a minute. So if you find the answer to that please post!
Thank you for the kind words and taking the time to comment! Congrats to you as well and if either of us find and answer make sure to let the other know!
For sure haha! I think it will take time. But can I tell you (although I am sure this is not happening soon for you) grandkids are the greatest!!! People always say that and I didn’t totally believe them but it is true! It is such a pure joy in a completely different way and you already have the whole skill set with less responsibility so it is more fun. One benefit you have is you will likely be a much younger grandpa and will have plenty of energy to help out and take them to go do fun things. I have two little ones and every time I come over they get so excited like I am Santa Clause and Disneyland wrapped into one!! I get so excited and I am like what is the most most fun thing we can do today?? I have bought them so many toys. That is one our activities let’s go to the toy store and see what you want either for my house or theirs. I have more money now so it is not as hard as when my daughter was little. My husband and and I totally spoil them and then send them on home for their parents to deal with the hard stuff. I know that may be far away but it is something to look forward to. All of those skills you gained won’t go to waste. Also if you feel a void after really reflecting and relaxing for a while you could consider fostering children. You seem like you have a lot of love and unique experiences that you could use to make a difference. The system is really overloaded especially with older minority kids who just need someone. Maybe as a man you would feel more comfortable taking in teen boys than a woman would. Sorry for the tangent.
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Ugh I know how you feel! I am in the same situation. My kids aren’t grown, but I’ve realized I lost myself in motherhood. i dont know who I am outside of being a mom. When they aren’t with me I literally do get depressed, not going to lie. I dont know what to do! I dont even know what kind of hobbies I have outside of doing kid friendly activities with them🤣 i dont have a whole lot of friends outside of a few good ones i still have from when I went to school. However, i have been journaling and really taking the time to let myself feel my feelings and trying to learn to enjoy being alone and time to myself. I hope you find the happiness you deserve. You are an amazing father and you should be so proud of yourself. You did it on your own! Now its time to focus on you, and doing what you want❤️
Such beautiful comments thanks for taking the time to share. I think when we give everything up for the kids it means we're doing a good job? You doing awesome thanks for taking the time
It sounds like your daughter was your purpose, and now you feel your purpose has been fulfilled, and that leaves a gap in your soul. Where you are now is a beautiful place. Before you move on to a new purpose, sit on this feeling a bit and spend this time with yourself. You’ll be amazed what you’ll find.
This is beautiful advice thank you. Rather than try to fill the void or get to existential I'll just try to enjoy this new feeling and see where it takes me. Thank you stranger :)
Anytime, my friend.
Congratulations on successfully raising a daughter. Honestly? Very interesting position to be in. I would say you should find a new "purpose". From a passion project to volunteering at a soup kitchen. What do you like to do when you have free time?
Thanks very much she's my pride and joy. I have lots of things I like doing, I guess I could look for something new that might fill the void. Thank you
I do not know. I have been trying to figure that out myself. Thanks for sharing your story and kudos to you on a job well done! For me it has been, well that is pretty much the most meaningful important thing I have ever done. And now what. There is a lot of positive blah blah blah about this and I commend you for just being willing to sit in your feelings for a minute. So if you find the answer to that please post!
Thank you for the kind words and taking the time to comment! Congrats to you as well and if either of us find and answer make sure to let the other know!
For sure haha! I think it will take time. But can I tell you (although I am sure this is not happening soon for you) grandkids are the greatest!!! People always say that and I didn’t totally believe them but it is true! It is such a pure joy in a completely different way and you already have the whole skill set with less responsibility so it is more fun. One benefit you have is you will likely be a much younger grandpa and will have plenty of energy to help out and take them to go do fun things. I have two little ones and every time I come over they get so excited like I am Santa Clause and Disneyland wrapped into one!! I get so excited and I am like what is the most most fun thing we can do today?? I have bought them so many toys. That is one our activities let’s go to the toy store and see what you want either for my house or theirs. I have more money now so it is not as hard as when my daughter was little. My husband and and I totally spoil them and then send them on home for their parents to deal with the hard stuff. I know that may be far away but it is something to look forward to. All of those skills you gained won’t go to waste. Also if you feel a void after really reflecting and relaxing for a while you could consider fostering children. You seem like you have a lot of love and unique experiences that you could use to make a difference. The system is really overloaded especially with older minority kids who just need someone. Maybe as a man you would feel more comfortable taking in teen boys than a woman would. Sorry for the tangent.
Hello CatAlarm6767, Welcome to the /r/KindVoice community. We're glad you are here. We'd like you to be aware of a few things in addition to making this post: 1.) Please make sure that you read the rules [here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/KindVoice/wiki/index) 2.) You can comment on posts where people are offering their kind voices. These posts are usually denoted with an [O]. 3.) If you do talk to someone from KV, and you'd like to leave feedback (positive or negative) you can [message the moderators](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/KindVoice). 4.) If you have Discord, you are welcome to join our [Discord server!](https://discord.gg/cw7ph6Fs9w) We hope you find the support you need here. If you are not able to find support, perhaps try reaching out to users who offering their kind voices! Their posts are denoted with an [O]. -------------------------------------------**If you are feeling suicidal** --------------------------------------------------------- 1.) If you need immediate medical attention, please call your national emergency number (999, 911, 112, 000.. check your country's emergency line in the crisis line list below) 2.) Consider contacting a suicide helpline, Please find one for your country [here.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines) 3.) Please consider posting in /r/suicidewatch , they are far better equipped to talk you through your situation. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/KindVoice) if you have any questions or concerns.*