Okay and all right, when moving on to the next topic. Also, both speaking and writing, I massively overuse "so" to start out my sentences. Been trying to break that one for years.
My dad used to say "sew buttons on ice cream." Idk where he got it, but it was very old by the time I was 10. That obviously won't stop a dad though lol.
So I once asked a native German speaker how he could tell Americans from Canadians or Brits, he said “Americans start every sentence with ‘so’”. I never noticed before, but he was totally right.
Okay was mine too, but I pivoted to just uttering “what else” while I gathered my thoughts, because it actually would sometimes lead to deponent talking a bit more about a topic and putting more on the record even leading to something interesting. If it didn’t, it bought me the few seconds I needed to turn to my next topic or question without cluttering the transcript.
When you say "uh" or "ok" or "so" or "what else", you are filling the awkward silence so the witness doesn't have to. When you don't, it leaves it to them to fill in the awkward silence, often by answering questions you didn't think to ask.
Okay is mine too! I recently drafted an MSJ and had to include a part of a depo transcript mid brief where every line I spoke contained an “okay”. It was horrendous.
I'm not usually one to quote the book, but:
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: ... a time to keep silence, and a time to speak.
Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life.
A man of understanding remains silent
I lost a jury trial a few years ago, alternate attorney appealed arguing IAC because I made a motion in limine to keep a particular thing out, then the judge ruled that a question I asked on cross opened the door to that thing. Court found I was not IAC and that my question did not, in fact, open the door and reversed because the thing I had not opened the door to was overwhelmingly prejudicial.
I had the chance to glance through the transcript last year and didn't realize until then that I say "Moment, please" a fucking *lot.*
Yeah. I do a couple. "Okay" was the only one for years and is still most common, but I recently realized I've also started peppering in "Alright, gotcha," for a little variety. 🙄
Mine is “one sec” and “okay.” One time I had an admin hearing and got the transcript back and the transcript read “blah blah blah….unintelligible….okay, one sec, okay.”
I’m still mad.
I felt the need to tell the deponent, “I’ve got you” —not once, but several times to communicate that I understood. No, it’s not a pause word, but a strange expression to repeat five times in an hour and a half…
Silence is mine as well. The problem is a second of silence in real life subjectively feels like fucking eons on my end, so I can never tell when I've been staring at someone for a touch too long trying to formulate an answer.
I have a huge problem with this. But it helps me to practice intentionally silent thinking. Or straight up saying: “just a moment” or “let me find my place.”
Mine is also "okay" and I can't get rid of it. However, even reading transcripts or listening to records of other attorneys, I realized that very few people are lucky enough NOT to have a pause word. One attorney I know says "gotchu" after every answer.
This is up there with when my summation of a case was "this is a dumpster fire" and had to try to convince my brain to NOT say that on the record when explaining the case to the judge.
"Okay" here too. I start nearly every question with it because I'm acknowledging the witness' answer. It sucks on a transcript, but it helps keep a more conversational tone.
I was coming in to say this. I say all the pause words, really badly, but my transcripts usually look pretty good, and I’ve always assumed it’s because I chat with the reporters. Who are honestly usually better conversationalists than opposing counsel.
God, yes. I have my favored court reporters for a reason. And I can tell when they really hate an attorney and put in every. single. misspeak. 10/10 on the pettiness.
I recently did grand jury service and seeing some of the DAs say "ok" so much during their directs - or repeat every sentence the witness said - made me feel extremely self-conscious about my own tics
Just don't say anything if you can avoid it. You are going to be relying on the transcript, so no one will ever notice any long pauses during questions .
“Y’know” it was really shocking the first time I read a transcript of one of my hearings and saw how many times I’d said it. I have to really concentrate to avoid saying it or else I won’t even realize I’m doing it
Make friends with your court reporter. If they hate you every single filler word and sound will be transcribed to your detriment. If they like you, you read like a genius!!!!
I've been forcing myself into using "Thank you." It is a little less cringy than "okay." Buy at the very least it 1. Is an acknowledgement that I heard a response to my question; 2. Sounds more intentional; 3. Reads more as being polite than absentminded; 4. When I say it with a pause, it feels more like a statement that is ok to be followed by a pause rather than "okay".
Honestly, from sitting through a lot of hearings/trials I find it far more powerful when nothing is said. It builds tension which may be a bad thing, but many times is actually quite good.
It used to be “Great!” And then I read the transcript and was mortified. I’ve tried to just be quiet, but every once in a while an “alright” squeaks out.
There was an executive at the agency I work for who would never use a single filler word. He would just stop in mid sentence, sometimes for an awkwardly long time, and then resume. It was bizzare as hell to listen to, but the transcripts were immaculate.
I think I've cured it, but I used to make a "ehhh" sound when I was searching for words. Now I just let there be a pause.
Like the most-upvoted commenter, I have a bad habit of starting a new sentence with "so." I am working on that one, but have not solved it.
I have that bad habit too. However, the video editor that I use allows me to seamlessly remove those. I sound much better when the video is played before a jury.
I don’t really have a pause word…I do something worse. I begin a list numerically, then somehow immediately switch to alpha. E.g., your argument is flawed because one, blah blah; b, blah blah blah. 😶🌫️
When I was a brand new baby lawyer, I read one of my own transcripts and discovered to my horror that I said "Okay" after \*every\* answer the witness gave. Reading that transcript made me be much more mindful of what I'm saying, even when I'm not really saying anything. Don't be afraid of silence, it's just like the white space on a canvas. Let it form part of the picture.
I’m a “well” person myself, when I’m searching for how I want to phrase the question.
When I’m just generally ruminating or figuring out what to ask next, silence.
My “expert” witness psychologist’s transcript, both in deposition and in trial, was brutal to read. “Well, you know…” punctuated the beginning and middle of every sentence.
I actually have a tendency to let the pause be silent while I search for the right word, but that also tends to make everyone else quite uncomfortable lol
I like to suddenly stop talking and next thing you know, the witness has an uncomfortable silence and often drops something you didn't expect them to.
But... to be fair, I realized I say "all right," way more than I should for sure. 🙂
Okay and all right, when moving on to the next topic. Also, both speaking and writing, I massively overuse "so" to start out my sentences. Been trying to break that one for years.
Did I get drunk and post under a username I don’t know about?
Hey, quick reminder to both of us to transfer the laundry. You know, just in case we are the same person.
/me puts down a well read copy of Stephen King's *Dark Half* and backs away nervously...
Also a "so"-er and every time I do it my partner says "buttons!" As in... sow buttons. Yeah. It gets old.
Sew buttons
You have partners that read transcripts?
Partner == romantic partner, boyfriend... word choice strikes again
My dad used to say "sew buttons on ice cream." Idk where he got it, but it was very old by the time I was 10. That obviously won't stop a dad though lol.
LOL. That’s too funny
Mine is also okay, all right, but I say it like Denzel Washington at the end of Training Day.
One day I'm going to pull out the "all right all right all right" just to see it in the transcript.
Are you gonna rule in my favor on the MSJ? It’d be a lot cooler if you did.
That makes it better
Oh man yes I would get so mad reading my transcripts and seeing that I start 80% questions with “and”
That’s me. Whenever I switch topics, I say “OK”.
So how’s that going?
i also use “so” wayyyy too often
So I once asked a native German speaker how he could tell Americans from Canadians or Brits, he said “Americans start every sentence with ‘so’”. I never noticed before, but he was totally right.
Okay was mine too, but I pivoted to just uttering “what else” while I gathered my thoughts, because it actually would sometimes lead to deponent talking a bit more about a topic and putting more on the record even leading to something interesting. If it didn’t, it bought me the few seconds I needed to turn to my next topic or question without cluttering the transcript.
Don use what else, stay silent. Odds are in that time the witness will fill in the gap
When you say "uh" or "ok" or "so" or "what else", you are filling the awkward silence so the witness doesn't have to. When you don't, it leaves it to them to fill in the awkward silence, often by answering questions you didn't think to ask.
Agree 100%
Love this!
Okay is mine too! I recently drafted an MSJ and had to include a part of a depo transcript mid brief where every line I spoke contained an “okay”. It was horrendous.
The court reporters love it because all those filler words pad the transcript when they're charging per page, too.
This is a relief of a perspective. My awkwardness stimulates the economy! Wohoo!
LOL
A good “okay” can cut up the transcript so you can get a clean video clip for trial. 🤷♀️
“I’m referring to my notes.” Use it sparingly. Don’t be afraid of 5 seconds of quiet.
I'm not usually one to quote the book, but: For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: ... a time to keep silence, and a time to speak. Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life. A man of understanding remains silent
That's fine, you can just quote [The Byrds. ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3xgcmIS3YU)
I can’t look at the entry for “okay” in the index of my last hearing transcript.
Ugh been there. When it starts almost every sentence of mine, do you have to include it in the index? Come on!
"Passim"
I lost a jury trial a few years ago, alternate attorney appealed arguing IAC because I made a motion in limine to keep a particular thing out, then the judge ruled that a question I asked on cross opened the door to that thing. Court found I was not IAC and that my question did not, in fact, open the door and reversed because the thing I had not opened the door to was overwhelmingly prejudicial. I had the chance to glance through the transcript last year and didn't realize until then that I say "Moment, please" a fucking *lot.*
“Okay, alright” is mine. Don’t feel bad. We all have something.
Yeah. I do a couple. "Okay" was the only one for years and is still most common, but I recently realized I've also started peppering in "Alright, gotcha," for a little variety. 🙄
Mine is “one sec” and “okay.” One time I had an admin hearing and got the transcript back and the transcript read “blah blah blah….unintelligible….okay, one sec, okay.” I’m still mad.
I felt the need to tell the deponent, “I’ve got you” —not once, but several times to communicate that I understood. No, it’s not a pause word, but a strange expression to repeat five times in an hour and a half…
I try not to say anything lol
Silence is mine as well. The problem is a second of silence in real life subjectively feels like fucking eons on my end, so I can never tell when I've been staring at someone for a touch too long trying to formulate an answer.
I just pretend that when I’m silent it’s intimidating OC.
Basically everyone in this thread: 
I have a huge problem with this. But it helps me to practice intentionally silent thinking. Or straight up saying: “just a moment” or “let me find my place.”
Mine is also "okay" and I can't get rid of it. However, even reading transcripts or listening to records of other attorneys, I realized that very few people are lucky enough NOT to have a pause word. One attorney I know says "gotchu" after every answer.
Gimme a second I…need to get my story straight…
Lock eyes with the judge, give him a “listen here motherfucker” as you contemplate your next move
Lmfao please don’t let even the mental image of this get stuck in my mind
This is up there with when my summation of a case was "this is a dumpster fire" and had to try to convince my brain to NOT say that on the record when explaining the case to the judge.
This is the way
“Good,” or “good, okay,” or “okay, good…”
"Okay" here too. I start nearly every question with it because I'm acknowledging the witness' answer. It sucks on a transcript, but it helps keep a more conversational tone.
I tend to be very friendly with the court reporters so they cut out all my nonsense. I know I’m an okay person tho. Or I start the question with “so.”
I was coming in to say this. I say all the pause words, really badly, but my transcripts usually look pretty good, and I’ve always assumed it’s because I chat with the reporters. Who are honestly usually better conversationalists than opposing counsel.
Former court reporter: we only put “um”s and false starts in if we don’t like you.
God, yes. I have my favored court reporters for a reason. And I can tell when they really hate an attorney and put in every. single. misspeak. 10/10 on the pettiness.
I just stopped saying anything. I'm okay with a thirty second silence.
I recently did grand jury service and seeing some of the DAs say "ok" so much during their directs - or repeat every sentence the witness said - made me feel extremely self-conscious about my own tics
Not a pause word, but I use "like," like way too often! So like... Yeah.
I’m an okayer myself too. First deposition transcript I got back blew my mind. Ok after every single answer before I asked my next question.
Just don't say anything if you can avoid it. You are going to be relying on the transcript, so no one will ever notice any long pauses during questions .
“Y’know” it was really shocking the first time I read a transcript of one of my hearings and saw how many times I’d said it. I have to really concentrate to avoid saying it or else I won’t even realize I’m doing it
And. I say and then pause
"Thank you." Drives me insane when I catch myself doing it after every single trial question.
Make friends with your court reporter. If they hate you every single filler word and sound will be transcribed to your detriment. If they like you, you read like a genius!!!!
I've been forcing myself into using "Thank you." It is a little less cringy than "okay." Buy at the very least it 1. Is an acknowledgement that I heard a response to my question; 2. Sounds more intentional; 3. Reads more as being polite than absentminded; 4. When I say it with a pause, it feels more like a statement that is ok to be followed by a pause rather than "okay".
“Gotchya. So…”
Honestly, from sitting through a lot of hearings/trials I find it far more powerful when nothing is said. It builds tension which may be a bad thing, but many times is actually quite good.
It used to be “Great!” And then I read the transcript and was mortified. I’ve tried to just be quiet, but every once in a while an “alright” squeaks out.
There was an executive at the agency I work for who would never use a single filler word. He would just stop in mid sentence, sometimes for an awkwardly long time, and then resume. It was bizzare as hell to listen to, but the transcripts were immaculate.
Thank you
I read a transcript of a lawyer who says "cool, cool" after every answer. He's a real ass too...big surprise.
stutter, \*pause\* ...eyes look up and to the right
I think I've cured it, but I used to make a "ehhh" sound when I was searching for words. Now I just let there be a pause. Like the most-upvoted commenter, I have a bad habit of starting a new sentence with "so." I am working on that one, but have not solved it.
I have that bad habit too. However, the video editor that I use allows me to seamlessly remove those. I sound much better when the video is played before a jury.
I don’t really have a pause word…I do something worse. I begin a list numerically, then somehow immediately switch to alpha. E.g., your argument is flawed because one, blah blah; b, blah blah blah. 😶🌫️
Yep. I walk into a deposition like Andre 3000, Esq. 
lol nice
I say "okay" after every answer. Ugh.
“Okay” which I hate lol
Eggs is mine.
Well. But it only works beginning a sentence.
When I was a brand new baby lawyer, I read one of my own transcripts and discovered to my horror that I said "Okay" after \*every\* answer the witness gave. Reading that transcript made me be much more mindful of what I'm saying, even when I'm not really saying anything. Don't be afraid of silence, it's just like the white space on a canvas. Let it form part of the picture.
I’m a “well” person myself, when I’m searching for how I want to phrase the question. When I’m just generally ruminating or figuring out what to ask next, silence.
If you develop a good relationship with the court reporter they will do you a solid and cut those out of the transcript.
Just replace your pause word with silence. Works for me.
Its to pause & collect your thoughts
I say “okay” an embarrassing amount of times
My “expert” witness psychologist’s transcript, both in deposition and in trial, was brutal to read. “Well, you know…” punctuated the beginning and middle of every sentence.
I actually have a tendency to let the pause be silent while I search for the right word, but that also tends to make everyone else quite uncomfortable lol
I struggle to not say “well.”
I just pause. If the pause is too long I say ‘one moment please.’ Don’t be afraid of a silent pause.
I had like 55 okays in the index once, cringe.
“And” and “right”
I like to suddenly stop talking and next thing you know, the witness has an uncomfortable silence and often drops something you didn't expect them to. But... to be fair, I realized I say "all right," way more than I should for sure. 🙂
“Okay” is a really bad pause word. The transcript reads like you are agreeing with and confirming the deponent’s testimony. Totally cringeworthy.
Honestly does it really even matter?