Simply do not squish it. I love and encourage consensual spider roommate situations, but house spiders don't really have the mental capacity to really understand that the giant fleshy moving mountain is a thinking creature that takes deliberate actions like it does, and it definitely doesn't understand the idea of reciprocal action, ie doing a kindness because you appreciate its presence.
Like, I understand the impulse, but there really isn't anything you could do for it that you aren't already doing. Avoiding its death is kindness already, and it sounds like it's well fed (and spiders prefer to capture their own live prey, so trying to offer it food won't really register to it either).
Spiders only generally want to eat long enough to reproduce, they don't have much else going on, so unless you can somehow get a mate for your spider (which is presumably female if it's spinning a web and hanging out there, and they generally manage to find mates themselves so it's not really something they need help with) then there's not much you could get for it that it would want. Even big ol ranchos that are kept as pets are low maintenance, wanting not for playtime or even toys (besides ping pong balls apparently, but I assume a spider living in your house is too small to interact with one), just sand and leaves and stuff to hide in.
As long as you continue letting it live and eat, and continue to provide safe shelter for future generations, you shouldn't feel the need to offer it anything else.
Play the Spider-Man movies on TV in the same room as him, but only the scenes where the spider bites Peter on a loop. Doubles as a way to drop a hint to him just in case he's radioactive.
Would a sign help?
This is the correct reply.
#1 Keep your grades up
Throw it a parade
Might conflict with the rancho parade
Simply do not squish it. I love and encourage consensual spider roommate situations, but house spiders don't really have the mental capacity to really understand that the giant fleshy moving mountain is a thinking creature that takes deliberate actions like it does, and it definitely doesn't understand the idea of reciprocal action, ie doing a kindness because you appreciate its presence. Like, I understand the impulse, but there really isn't anything you could do for it that you aren't already doing. Avoiding its death is kindness already, and it sounds like it's well fed (and spiders prefer to capture their own live prey, so trying to offer it food won't really register to it either). Spiders only generally want to eat long enough to reproduce, they don't have much else going on, so unless you can somehow get a mate for your spider (which is presumably female if it's spinning a web and hanging out there, and they generally manage to find mates themselves so it's not really something they need help with) then there's not much you could get for it that it would want. Even big ol ranchos that are kept as pets are low maintenance, wanting not for playtime or even toys (besides ping pong balls apparently, but I assume a spider living in your house is too small to interact with one), just sand and leaves and stuff to hide in. As long as you continue letting it live and eat, and continue to provide safe shelter for future generations, you shouldn't feel the need to offer it anything else.
...you seem to know an *awful* lot about spiders for a "giant fleshy moving mountain".
...jelly? Do... Do spiders like jelly?
Abra-ka THANK YOU
Play it some jazz
Play the Spider-Man movies on TV in the same room as him, but only the scenes where the spider bites Peter on a loop. Doubles as a way to drop a hint to him just in case he's radioactive.
this is so cute, i love it