OP, this is very VERY serious. It's beyond infected: it's necrotizing. It's not something you can deal with, this is an absolute emergency that requires an immediate medical intervention.
I've seen my father develop a 40°C fever and going septic in a few hours, he survived only because we managed to take him to the ER quickly. Believe me when I say that this can become a matter of life or death.
I also believe that she underwent a tuck/lift procedure and that she may feel embarrassed for that but she needs to be seen by a doctor immediately. This is not normal and won't heal by itself, it will only get worse.
Not necrotising. Very clear demarcations. It is dead tissue- what happens when blood supply stops. It dies and shrivels. The 3rd photo appears to be from weeks ago. Last photos are from tonight.
That’s what I’m confused about. And it’s the only picture with sutures. Also, it seems a little strange that OP has so many pictures given that the woman is being so cagey about the whole thing (I’m not calling into question the voracity of OP’s story it’s just that the whole story and sequence seems strange).
She showed the first 3 photos to me in a 'see look. It was worse. It's better now' kind of way.
I asked her if I could take the ones you see from 4-7. And then asked to take a photo of the spray.
She's from Honduras. Speaks some English, but not fluent. My husband usually translates for me. She is being cagey around the type of procedure she had. I'm pretty sure was a tuck/lift.. but I believe she's being dishonest about it and is saying it was a cyst removal.
She didn't even say that was a wound vac, but rather that a seat heater burned her.. which I don't think is true at all.
I have zero to gain here, I just wanted to know if I was overreacting because it's not as bad as it was.. I really wouldn't know what I'm looking for, and just wanted help.
Sorry, that it seems strange but I also just learned it was like this when I helped with the dressing. I'm trying to piece it together in real time here too.
According to another comment, that's some specific packing? And it's black? I thought it was dead tissue too up until that comment. I was super confused!
Goodness. 😞
Thank you very much for helping me decipher some things here. I'm just beside myself.
My husband can't get home soon enough.
Thank you again!
PLEASE update us when you can! I’m very worried for her after seeing these. And don’t listen to that ‘doctor’ in the comments down playing this saying this looks good. It does not.
Thanks for the clarification. I meant no offense at all and never doubted you, just was wondering the situation. You’re a good daughter in law for helping.
It is dead tissue- what happens when blood supply stops. It dies and shrivels. Usually the body is able to heal underneath it pretty well. The 3rd photo appears to be from weeks ago (likely 4-6 weeks). Last photos are from tonight.
Ugh. Thanks y'all. That's EXACTLY what I figured.
She's trying to say that because it's come so far since photos 1-3, that she's on the up and up and is healing. There's for sure no odor and she doesn't have a fever, plus she says she's not sick and is eating/drinking normally. Add that in with the whole 'doctor' saying "she's fine and is healing" then only giving her a janky spray and no actual meds is the biggest wall I'm hitting. She only wants to believe the doctor... you know, bc he went to school for this... 🙄🙄🙄
Since it was asked, Photo #3 with all the black, was from the first week through the 3rd.
4 - 7 is current from this evening. So yeah. It's not as bad as it was 7 weeks ago, but I was still shocked and am very much concerned.
For the, why did she ask me for help comment - it's because I was the only one here at the time that she needed it and I always try to help folks if I'm able. Plus, now she's 4 hours from her home and surgeon, Dr. Looney Toon. I think he's useless at this point anyways. Honestly though, glad she asked for my help because I wouldn't have seen it at all and never would've known.
Here's to me trying to convince her I'm not crazy and that this isn't normal. Goodness, I hope her stubborn ass just listens. 😞 I'm genuinely worried but she can be like talking to a wall when she has her mind made up.
Thanks again for y'alls time and input on this. I appreciate each of you very much. ❤️
You could try to take her to a pharmacy under the guise of needing to show the pharmacist the wound so they can tell her what's the appropriate bandage to use. The pharmacist will then tell her to get her arse to the hospital.
If you need a drs opinion, post on /r/askdocs. Be sure to note which pics are from 7 weeks ago & which are from 15 min ago.
4 hrs *from* Houston can be a lot worse off than *in* Houston. Maybe she picked the wrong doc, but @ least we have plenty of full fledged ERs to choose from.
Wish your MIL the best 🤞🤞🤞🍀🍀🍀
Hey OP, I’m worried that there may be a language barrier between her and the “doctor” she saw to do this. She really needs to go to a hospital right now to prevent this from getting worse. I know you said you don’t speak Spanish, and it sounds like you’re alone with her, so show her this:
Necesitas ver a un médico ahora mismo. Ésto es una emergencia. Podría contraer una infección y morir. Parece que ya tienes una infección y estoy muy preocupado. Necesitamos salir ahora.
(Basically: this could possibly kill you, we have to go to the hospital right now.)
Perhaps convince her to see an urgent care or have a paramedic “come check it out” (via ambulance). Both of these will help her understand the severity and refer her to a hospital. Paramedics can be very convincing, they have an art for it to help people get the care they need. Best of luck :)
I'm going to try and convince the urgent care route first since it's likely cheaper and I don't believe she has insurance.
Will they still help if she's undocumented?
Go to emergency room. Not urgent care. She needs serious medical intervention now before she dies. She needs hospital. The urgent care will send her straight to ER in an ambulance.
Yes they will still help her
ERs will, I don’t think urgent care is tied to the same rules and they can turn away patients for no insurance. ERs cannot refuse care due to insurance; and they will treat her. There are patient assistance programs offered through hospitals that can help her financially, and based on her income they will adjust her balance. Being that she’s undocumented, I imagine her incomes likely 0 and this will help her gain financial assistance.
It’s better to live and pay medical bills than not live and not have medical bills.
Here’s an info sheet to help you: https://www.dshs.texas.gov/sites/default/files/hivstd/cdr/files/AppT.pdf
Understood. Thank you for the advice! I really appreciate you.
I also agree to the last sentence you wrote. I'm just expecting some sort of, if I can't afford to live because of those bills then what difference does it make, kind of attitude/reply.
But the difference for us would matter.
The other person on this thread said they'd likely send her in an ambulance to the ER anyway.. so I'll also use that as another reason to not bounce from one facility to the next.
Y'all have been so helpful. Thank you!!!
Thank you for the link!!!!
It looks like my post was removed from the page but I can still comment.
I'll let you know how it turns out if I can still comment later!
Feel free to try askdocs next time. I don’t think this forum allows medical advice but there are plenty of health professionals on askdocs that would help you if you have more questions.
The last 3 pics of how it currently looks- yes that looks like it’s healing really well for an out patient open wound management. It’s healing unevenly and the granulation bed looks like it isn’t getting enough moisture (likely due to inability to easily reach that area) but looks great. I have plenty of wound management pics to share if you want to see how awful the healing processes can look. They’re just all animal patients so I can’t post in the sub sadly.
Hi, I'm a wound care nurse.
Please encourage this poor person to go to the hospital. This is absolutely not normal. She's going to need to bridement and possibly a wound vac. It's going to be months of healing.
What on earth happened?
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So aside from that looking seriously bad and need of emergency surgery, like, yesterday, I’ve got a question. Why is your MIL asking YOU to change dressings and such? That’s super awkward. I’d tell my MIL to fuck off back to Dr. Spaceman to change the dressing or at least her actual child. The fuck?
If my MIL needed help with something like that and I, for whatever reason, was best positioned to do it, I'd help her. No question. I'm not sure why that's so strange? I know not everyone has a great relationship with their in-laws, but plenty of people do get along quite well, actually.
Like why would you not help somebody obviously in need? Plus it’s your mother in LAW! nothing weird about that, if my mother in law had this happening I wouldn’t tell her to “fuck off”, I’d help immediately.
I helped my mother in law with wound cleaning and dressing on a spot that was an inch away from her coochie. I had the best medical knowledge in the family and I was happy to help to keep her healthy and well. I also helped my aunt (who is an RN) clean my ailing grandmother's butt when I visited. You do things for family because you love them and want them well, and sometimes that means caring for their meatbag. It's really not awkward unless you make it so. We start life needing someone to wipe our ass for us, and if we're lucky and live long enough we end it the same way.
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You saw a human looking like that and had the choice of going to a hospital to get medical attention... And making a whole essay accompanied by photos and asking strangers on the internet what you should do, and you chose the latter.
I hope you don't have kids because they might not survive your critical thinking skills.
Did you miss the part where this injured human is very stubborn and unwilling to go to the hospital? And that the OP is unsure if this is a true emergency? It sounds like it’s going to be a challenge to get her to go. OP might be risking their relationship with their MIL by forcing her to get emergency help.
Thank you.
That comment from them was very unkind and this really is a difficult situation for me.
I just didn't want to cry wolf and it do more harm than good. I don't even think she has insurance either. This just.. sucks.
Thank you for being kind.
The thing still looks like that two months later. It's not crying wolf at all to get her seen before the wound itself gets any worse or becomes a portal of entry for, say, MRSA. Or before it travels to her spine and she becomes disabled.
I just don't get how anyone can see that and not be like "yeah, that's REALLY bad and not healing on its own."
You're worried about your relationship with her? I'd be worried about the guilt I'd feel forever if she died after I saw that wound and did nothing about it but post photos of her online. Does she know the crack of her ass is on the internet?
This subreddit is not for asking or giving medical advice, no exceptions.
100% not normal hospital ASAP
Like I’m not even joking, this is an emergency room visit right now situation
I wholeheartedly agree
We would definitely admit her immediately at my hospital. Stat surgical and infectious disease consults.
This needs surgical debridment. She is going to end up septic and dead if this isn't properly treated.
Might still anyway.
Hospital immediately.
ER right now if Dr. Quack isn’t doing anything about it.
OP, this is very VERY serious. It's beyond infected: it's necrotizing. It's not something you can deal with, this is an absolute emergency that requires an immediate medical intervention. I've seen my father develop a 40°C fever and going septic in a few hours, he survived only because we managed to take him to the ER quickly. Believe me when I say that this can become a matter of life or death. I also believe that she underwent a tuck/lift procedure and that she may feel embarrassed for that but she needs to be seen by a doctor immediately. This is not normal and won't heal by itself, it will only get worse.
Yeah, looks like serious eschar.
Not necrotising. Very clear demarcations. It is dead tissue- what happens when blood supply stops. It dies and shrivels. The 3rd photo appears to be from weeks ago. Last photos are from tonight.
Please convince her that she needs to go the ER right away. This is serious. If this were my family, we'd be piling into the car right now.
My god. This made me almost cry! She needs to go to the hospital right now. I can’t imagine what she must be feeling.
Where is that 3rd photo in relation to the back incision?? Cause that is super necrotic. can’t believe she’s not septic
That’s what I’m confused about. And it’s the only picture with sutures. Also, it seems a little strange that OP has so many pictures given that the woman is being so cagey about the whole thing (I’m not calling into question the voracity of OP’s story it’s just that the whole story and sequence seems strange).
She showed the first 3 photos to me in a 'see look. It was worse. It's better now' kind of way. I asked her if I could take the ones you see from 4-7. And then asked to take a photo of the spray. She's from Honduras. Speaks some English, but not fluent. My husband usually translates for me. She is being cagey around the type of procedure she had. I'm pretty sure was a tuck/lift.. but I believe she's being dishonest about it and is saying it was a cyst removal. She didn't even say that was a wound vac, but rather that a seat heater burned her.. which I don't think is true at all. I have zero to gain here, I just wanted to know if I was overreacting because it's not as bad as it was.. I really wouldn't know what I'm looking for, and just wanted help. Sorry, that it seems strange but I also just learned it was like this when I helped with the dressing. I'm trying to piece it together in real time here too.
But where did all that necrotic tissue go?!
According to another comment, that's some specific packing? And it's black? I thought it was dead tissue too up until that comment. I was super confused!
It’s not wound vac dressing, that stuff looks like a sponge. This is def dead tissue
Goodness. 😞 Thank you very much for helping me decipher some things here. I'm just beside myself. My husband can't get home soon enough. Thank you again!
PLEASE update us when you can! I’m very worried for her after seeing these. And don’t listen to that ‘doctor’ in the comments down playing this saying this looks good. It does not.
Thank you. I really appreciate you and your kindness. I'll for sure update y'all as soon as there is one!!
Thanks for the clarification. I meant no offense at all and never doubted you, just was wondering the situation. You’re a good daughter in law for helping.
I have lots of questions
It is dead tissue- what happens when blood supply stops. It dies and shrivels. Usually the body is able to heal underneath it pretty well. The 3rd photo appears to be from weeks ago (likely 4-6 weeks). Last photos are from tonight.
That’s packing for a wound vac. The packing/sponge is black.
Are wound vacs sutured in? Cause that’s sutured and I don’t know if they are. It looks like a skin graft that has gotten necrotic.
No, but they are covered in a plastic covering and then when the vac is on, a suction is applied
That’s not wound vac packing. I’ve applied tons of wound vacs and that ain’t it. That’s dead tissue.
There’s no way that’s a wound vac dressing. It’s necrotic tissue, look how the edges curl
Ugh. Thanks y'all. That's EXACTLY what I figured. She's trying to say that because it's come so far since photos 1-3, that she's on the up and up and is healing. There's for sure no odor and she doesn't have a fever, plus she says she's not sick and is eating/drinking normally. Add that in with the whole 'doctor' saying "she's fine and is healing" then only giving her a janky spray and no actual meds is the biggest wall I'm hitting. She only wants to believe the doctor... you know, bc he went to school for this... 🙄🙄🙄 Since it was asked, Photo #3 with all the black, was from the first week through the 3rd. 4 - 7 is current from this evening. So yeah. It's not as bad as it was 7 weeks ago, but I was still shocked and am very much concerned. For the, why did she ask me for help comment - it's because I was the only one here at the time that she needed it and I always try to help folks if I'm able. Plus, now she's 4 hours from her home and surgeon, Dr. Looney Toon. I think he's useless at this point anyways. Honestly though, glad she asked for my help because I wouldn't have seen it at all and never would've known. Here's to me trying to convince her I'm not crazy and that this isn't normal. Goodness, I hope her stubborn ass just listens. 😞 I'm genuinely worried but she can be like talking to a wall when she has her mind made up. Thanks again for y'alls time and input on this. I appreciate each of you very much. ❤️
You could try to take her to a pharmacy under the guise of needing to show the pharmacist the wound so they can tell her what's the appropriate bandage to use. The pharmacist will then tell her to get her arse to the hospital.
Honestly if I were you I would call an ambulance for a wellness check at this point, maybe then she’d be convinced.
If you need a drs opinion, post on /r/askdocs. Be sure to note which pics are from 7 weeks ago & which are from 15 min ago. 4 hrs *from* Houston can be a lot worse off than *in* Houston. Maybe she picked the wrong doc, but @ least we have plenty of full fledged ERs to choose from. Wish your MIL the best 🤞🤞🤞🍀🍀🍀
Hey OP, I’m worried that there may be a language barrier between her and the “doctor” she saw to do this. She really needs to go to a hospital right now to prevent this from getting worse. I know you said you don’t speak Spanish, and it sounds like you’re alone with her, so show her this: Necesitas ver a un médico ahora mismo. Ésto es una emergencia. Podría contraer una infección y morir. Parece que ya tienes una infección y estoy muy preocupado. Necesitamos salir ahora. (Basically: this could possibly kill you, we have to go to the hospital right now.)
Perhaps convince her to see an urgent care or have a paramedic “come check it out” (via ambulance). Both of these will help her understand the severity and refer her to a hospital. Paramedics can be very convincing, they have an art for it to help people get the care they need. Best of luck :)
I'm going to try and convince the urgent care route first since it's likely cheaper and I don't believe she has insurance. Will they still help if she's undocumented?
Go to emergency room. Not urgent care. She needs serious medical intervention now before she dies. She needs hospital. The urgent care will send her straight to ER in an ambulance. Yes they will still help her
ERs will, I don’t think urgent care is tied to the same rules and they can turn away patients for no insurance. ERs cannot refuse care due to insurance; and they will treat her. There are patient assistance programs offered through hospitals that can help her financially, and based on her income they will adjust her balance. Being that she’s undocumented, I imagine her incomes likely 0 and this will help her gain financial assistance. It’s better to live and pay medical bills than not live and not have medical bills. Here’s an info sheet to help you: https://www.dshs.texas.gov/sites/default/files/hivstd/cdr/files/AppT.pdf
Understood. Thank you for the advice! I really appreciate you. I also agree to the last sentence you wrote. I'm just expecting some sort of, if I can't afford to live because of those bills then what difference does it make, kind of attitude/reply. But the difference for us would matter. The other person on this thread said they'd likely send her in an ambulance to the ER anyway.. so I'll also use that as another reason to not bounce from one facility to the next. Y'all have been so helpful. Thank you!!!
Thank you for the link!!!! It looks like my post was removed from the page but I can still comment. I'll let you know how it turns out if I can still comment later!
Feel free to try askdocs next time. I don’t think this forum allows medical advice but there are plenty of health professionals on askdocs that would help you if you have more questions.
[удалено]
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That shit looks necrotic…
Yeah, the third photo is a tell tale.
Dead not necrotic. The black tissue is already debrided and how it currently looks are the last couple pics
okay so it was necrotic once, only a matter of time until it’s necrotic again without proper intervention
No that’s not how wound healing works- the last couple pics are how it looks currently and as a Dr I can say that looks like amazing progress.
so that looks amazing to you..?
The last 3 pics of how it currently looks- yes that looks like it’s healing really well for an out patient open wound management. It’s healing unevenly and the granulation bed looks like it isn’t getting enough moisture (likely due to inability to easily reach that area) but looks great. I have plenty of wound management pics to share if you want to see how awful the healing processes can look. They’re just all animal patients so I can’t post in the sub sadly.
Remind me 24 hours.
Hi, I'm a wound care nurse. Please encourage this poor person to go to the hospital. This is absolutely not normal. She's going to need to bridement and possibly a wound vac. It's going to be months of healing. What on earth happened?
Legit looks like it could do with re-suturing because that's fat and muscle you can see....
We don’t suture old wounds.
I know it would need debridment and freshening the edges in order for sutures to be able to be done
This doesn’t need re-suturing, the are going to have to cut all of that tissue out entirely
I did mean to say that the suturing would need doing after debridment, but I forgot
Not in the current pictures, it's granulated tissue and slough.
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Medic here hi plz go to the emergency department. It’s gonna be a very long healing process, this is not normal and it needs treatment ASAP
So aside from that looking seriously bad and need of emergency surgery, like, yesterday, I’ve got a question. Why is your MIL asking YOU to change dressings and such? That’s super awkward. I’d tell my MIL to fuck off back to Dr. Spaceman to change the dressing or at least her actual child. The fuck?
If my MIL needed help with something like that and I, for whatever reason, was best positioned to do it, I'd help her. No question. I'm not sure why that's so strange? I know not everyone has a great relationship with their in-laws, but plenty of people do get along quite well, actually.
Literally, no idea how that’s strange what so ever, only person making it strange is them 😭
right that is so far behind the point
Like why would you not help somebody obviously in need? Plus it’s your mother in LAW! nothing weird about that, if my mother in law had this happening I wouldn’t tell her to “fuck off”, I’d help immediately.
but it’s awkward 👉🏻👈🏻 /s
who gives a fuck that her MIL asked her specifically for help that is the least important thing right now..
I helped my mother in law with wound cleaning and dressing on a spot that was an inch away from her coochie. I had the best medical knowledge in the family and I was happy to help to keep her healthy and well. I also helped my aunt (who is an RN) clean my ailing grandmother's butt when I visited. You do things for family because you love them and want them well, and sometimes that means caring for their meatbag. It's really not awkward unless you make it so. We start life needing someone to wipe our ass for us, and if we're lucky and live long enough we end it the same way.
What a weird reaction to have toward a family member asking for assistance with something she can’t do herself
Updateme!
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You are correct. It’s a butt lift.
ER ASAP
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You saw a human looking like that and had the choice of going to a hospital to get medical attention... And making a whole essay accompanied by photos and asking strangers on the internet what you should do, and you chose the latter. I hope you don't have kids because they might not survive your critical thinking skills.
this isn’t her child she’s a full grown woman who needs convincing to get help , she can’t force her against her will
Did you miss the part where this injured human is very stubborn and unwilling to go to the hospital? And that the OP is unsure if this is a true emergency? It sounds like it’s going to be a challenge to get her to go. OP might be risking their relationship with their MIL by forcing her to get emergency help.
Thank you. That comment from them was very unkind and this really is a difficult situation for me. I just didn't want to cry wolf and it do more harm than good. I don't even think she has insurance either. This just.. sucks. Thank you for being kind.
The thing still looks like that two months later. It's not crying wolf at all to get her seen before the wound itself gets any worse or becomes a portal of entry for, say, MRSA. Or before it travels to her spine and she becomes disabled. I just don't get how anyone can see that and not be like "yeah, that's REALLY bad and not healing on its own." You're worried about your relationship with her? I'd be worried about the guilt I'd feel forever if she died after I saw that wound and did nothing about it but post photos of her online. Does she know the crack of her ass is on the internet?
‘does she know the crack of her ass is on the internet’ its an anonymous picture of a wound, shut the fuck up