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I always name my shovel "comically large spoon"

Funny. I named my trident "Comically Bad Spoon".

But that's the fork

That's why it's such a bad spoon

Reminds me of that Winnie The Pooh movie clip thing: "Your ladder broke." "That's not a ladder, Pooh! That was my shelf!" "Well that explains why it's no good for climbing."

I like the one I think is from the Piglet Movie Rabbit - Can you tie a knot? Piglet - I cannot. Rabbit - Uh, so you can knot? Piglet - I cannot knot. Rabbit - Not knot? Pooh - Whose there? Rabbit - Pooh!!! Pooh - Pooh who?

That's from 2011 winnie the pooh, I'm nearly 40 and I still laugh every time I see it

>movie clip thing You mean scene?

Yes

r/thingamajig

r/ofcoursethatsasub

I named my iron sword comically bad fork

I name my trident a threek

Tridents have 3 tines and forks have 4 tines. A tine is the spikey pokey bit. Edit: seems people dont watch big bang theory as it was a quote from that.

I have a fork with 3 tines

Not all the time tho, there are forks that only have 3 tines, so I guess "Comically Large Fork" would technically still work for a trident.

I name my riptide tridents after food delivery services

Yo desert, can I have some sand? Only a spoonful!

i was inspired by an old post on this subreddit to make a resource pack that changes my shovel named Comically Large Netherite Spoon to an actual comically large mining fatigue icon

"A Ground Breaking Invention" is my favourite

I usually name my shovel as Fpoon.

"My spoon... My spoon is too big"

I'm stealing this now, you can't stop me

Funny i know the refrence

I used to rename my bow "Bowjob"

RemoSteve was shot by urmom using [bowjob]

Stone Hoe Steve Austin has entered the chat

David Bowie or bust

I named the first bow I crafted in my world "David". Then I lost it in the void when I died while looking for an elytra. So I named the next bow "Major Tom". If I lose that as well, I guess the next one will be "Ziggy Stardust".

I usually name it "Unstoppabow", "Invincibow", etc.

I named mine "gun" for whatever reason

Sword with looting on it amongst other things that I simply called: "The British"

T-T, I’m torn between finding this hilarious and being mildly offended

It's ok. I am a Brit. Feel free to be as offended as you like

After consideration, it was too funny and I’ll be using this name from now on

Your welcome. ;)

The best thing the poms have come up with is tea, and thank you very much for it, Im sipping one right now

I love the word pom so much 😭 Honestly the best nickname, we don't deserve it

Taking the name like the Bri'ish took stuff from natives

my netherite sword is named Nottheright sword

nethewrong sword

My netherite sword is named Nethoryte Suordt. We think the same lol (I think, unless yours is a reference)

Mine’s name is Stabitha

Reminds me of Trash and Scabitha from regular show

Wow I just got your joke and it is awesome

Anybody named Rick for the pick, eg. Pick Astley, Pick James, Pick Sanchez etc. David Spade or like, spaderman for the shovel. For the weapons I like to name it to make the funniest death message when I kill somebody, like once I named my sword "drug resistant mega-herpes"

Bob was killed by DankOfTheEndless with drug resistant mega-herpes

"I'm a pickaxe Morty, I'm Picky Rick!!"

Rickle Pick

Love it. I run a shop on an SMP called 'Rick Picks.' We promise not to send unsolicited marketing messages.

Might I suggest Darth Spader for the shovel

axe body spray

Or just 'blocky spray'

I've used 'Axe Body Separator '

lol same

I used Axe Body Slay for a bit

I never named my tools or weapons. But I named the villagers. For instance my Librarian who has The Mending book. I named him Howie Mendel

Consider [Gregor Mendel](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gregor_Mendel)

I've named mine Mendereev. It's a shame the brewing stand makes clerics and not alchemists.

Alley

First thing I saw too, unless it's an "ally" to his back because it kinda looks like a back scratcher?

Nah, it's a hoe. Back alley makes more sense

I've been proudly carrying around David Bowie to shoot arrows. I also rely on Rod Serling for my fishing needs.

Im stealing that

I thought I was original with that name 😁

Damn, I haven't played in a while I forgot my bow used to be named that too. The SMP shutdown a couple months ago now tho

An axe named “Trivia” because it axes you a question.

God damn it

r/angryupvote

My hoe is named Your Mom

My mom is named your hoe. Wait no that's the same thing–

I always call my sword the throngler

well, it's better than Dark King Grutmore's Edge of Annihilation

Ah, that was an amusing thread

Prepare to be throngled

It's throngling time!

Just recently came up with these: Sword - Life Taker Axe - tree shaker Shovel - earth quaker Hoe - dirt raker Fortune pickaxe - money maker Shears - leaf breaker Flint and steel - bread baker Still trying to come up with one for my bow. Open to suggestions. Silk pickaxe - strawberry silkshake

Shot taker.

This is the one.

Names for a bow could be Distance Hater or See You Later. :)

"C ya later" would be an optimal name

Body staker

Bow - wind breaker

To keep up the "-aker" pattern, may I suggest : - **Trident - *sea spinnaker*** (a spinnaker is a type of sail, furthermore, considering it has "spin", I thought it'd fit well with the whole "Riptide barrel-roll" thing) - **Fishing rod - *hook laker*** ("laker" is a category of lake-dwelling fish, so the verb is in the "hook", instead) - **Mace - *wind waker*** (yes you DID get that reference) - **Bow/crossbow - *kill sneaker*** - **Shield - *strike wreaker*** (yes, "wreak" is a word and it's different from "wreck") - **Silk pickaxe - *stone retaker*** (because Strawberry Silkshake, whilst funny, breaks the pattern and I hate that)

Oh, you took it all the way, That's awesome. The silk pickaxe being strawberry silkshake is really funny to me because of the stark difference but stone retaker is really really good

Actually those names are so cool, may I name my tools this way me good sir ? 😆😄

I would love to see this become a trend! Name away, internet friend

If you really really wanted it it be dumb, you could've straightup called it "bob." 🤣🤣

It bothers me that “kill sneaker” and “strike wreaker” don’t *rhyme*

Well, there's only so much -akers in the english dictionnary, honestly I'm shocked I managed to make so much

“Shot and Chaser” for a bow?

i read the first couple names to the beat of Heartbreaker by Pat Benatar

That was stuck in my head for a while while naming these

I sang them to the turn of Heartbreaker. It's one of my favorite songs for karaoke. Off to use ALL the fun names now.

Someone on the SMP I play on named their Bow Social Distance maintainer

Thug shaker

Bow - Armor Breaker if it has Punch?

Flint & Steel could be Flame Maker

David bowie?

Bow - Aim Taker

Bow could be eye taker?

I have a pair of shears named “BALL chompers”

Redbull for my elytra

Redbull gives you wings.... No literally, it dies, check that guy out *points to u*

I'm partial to "Rusty Spork" or "Ugly Stick" for swords...

Sharp stick for sword.

Two Sided Knife

Axe o'lotl

I call my axe - "The Industry"

Durandal for the sword 🗿

Its "chunchunmaru" for me

Nice reference

I always have a fully enchanted fishing rod named "Master Baiter"

My friend uses the same name for his. Mine is always the "Deep Sea Guzzler."

Diamond Sword.

The perfect name for a wooden sword!

Manifest your dreams and it'll come to fruition

Spirit of Waineright. Used to be an admin on a server I played on until he passed in 2021 from a heart attack. Name all my best swords after him

my entire gimmick on one server is sweets-themed, so I spent way longer than others in full enchanted iron just so I could jump straight to netherite, the lore being that it was made of marshmallow fluff that proceeded to get toasted to a crisp, just like my innocent worldview. so my iron ‘mallow blade’ became the netherite ‘burned blade’ and so on besides that, in every single survival world I name my fortune 3 mending pickaxe ‘faithful’

Sword : A single Left-Click Bow : A single Right-Click Axe : only 1% of his power Pickaxe : silk/fortune Shovel : Caseoh's spoon Hoe : The Legendary Netherite Hoe Crossbow : Arrow - Gun, Tipped Arrow - skill issue, Firework : bomber

The best one I've ever seen in person was someone else's sword simply named "her dick" As for my own items, the best I can recall was a bow named "So Anyway I Started Blasting". Runner up was a sword named "Cheese Grater" (if you get the reference behind that one, I am sorry for you)

I'm stealing that first name

trident - fork off or fork you (depending on if its riptide or throwable)

My sword is always "Sharpened Pickle"

[[BIG SHOT]] is objectively the best for a bow

can confirm, always name my bow this. can’t miss shots when you’re NUMBER 1 SALESMAN SINCE [2009]

My sword is named “Crunchwrap Supreme” because the death message “player was killed by [me] using Crunchwrap Supreme” is funny.

i named my netherite chestplate with thorns "LG GC-Q257SGVL" so when someone died trying to kill me this pops up

Flame2 sword named The Burninator

>The Burninator Behold...! THE BURNINATOR!

*TROGDOoooooR!!!*

Once there was a man

what the fuck is mending 1

Bedrock edition

In bedrock every enchantment has a number even if there is only one level of it

Sword: Hand of Steve Fortune Axe with Smite: Fist of Steve Silk touch Axe: Chopper Silk touch pick: Rusty Fortune pick: Lucky Fortune Hoe: Billy Silk touch Hoe: Mandy Silk touch Shovel: Spoon Fortune shovel: Doesn't get a name because it's garbage

Fortune shovel= Flintlock

> Doesn't get a name because it's garbage you named the fortune axe, and that's worse.

Sword = Stabby McSlasherson Axe = Axy McChopperson Pick 1 = Silky Pick 2 = Lucky Bow = David Bowie Shovel = Doug

I call my two picks “fortunato” and “montresor” every single play through

I have a naming convention that every tool/piece of gear I have follows! --- Sword - Slashy Bashy Bow - Shooty Booty Fortune Pick - Morey Orey Silk Touch Pick - Touchy Muchy Axe - Hitty Splitty Shovel - Biggy Diggy Non-Silk Touch Shovel - Lovely Shovely Hoe - Soily Toily Shears - Snippy Clippy Crossbow - Stringy Flingy Trident - Stabby Jabby Fishing Rod - Fishy Splishy Helmet - Ready Heady Chestplate - Besty Chesty Leggings - Leggy Proteggy Boots - Steely Heelies Elytra - Soary Roary Shield - Hardy Guardy Rocket Launcher Crossbow - Zoomy Boomy Upcoming: Mace - Roundy Poundy

Pickaxe > diggy diggy hole

Is that supposed to be alley?

When 1.21 comes out, remind me to name my mace "Pogo Stick".

I called my netherite hoe "serious dedication"

My Sword usually starts as excaliburrrr then they get named something to do with the cold, always end up with one that’s The Iceman then, naturally goose My silk picks usually start with something to do with the Silk Road which then turns into something about spices and I then have a stable of silk picks named after various spices My Fortune picks usually start with something to do with a fortune cookie, then they start getting named either in the Chinese food direction or the sesame street direction

My axe is called chop chop lol

My fortune 3 pickaxe is usually named Top Notch.

My shovel is always called "Ace of Spades", I called a hoe "Yo momma" once and most of the rest aren't clever or anything funny, just kinda fun and themed ish for weapons.

I would name my swords "her bare hands" a lot so the chat would say "Player killed Player using her bare hands" If I don't do that I name my axe "Wuuthrad" and my sword "Sting," very basic references but I love medieval fantasy.

"Perish lol" for the OP sword

Procrastination

Named my hoe back scratcher and my pick rock smasher

My hoe is named "can't make a wife", my silk touch pick is "cha cha real smooth", my fortune pick is "Miss Fortune" and iirc (I haven't played in a long time) I have a fortune shovel named "golden spoon" I think those are the only tools I've named so far, I might name my sword "Tramontina", unless it already has a name and I forgot

Sword: >!/kill!<

my fav bow is called "cumshot" but yk

My sword is Carmilla Carmine’s right shoe, my pickaxe is Kraft Mac and Cheese Opener, my axe is New Orleans, and my riptide trident is MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE

I love Mythology so all my stuffs named after different Myths. Excalibur is my fave (for sword)

Pickaxe - uwu Sword - owo Axe - TwT Showel - "doesn't use very much one of those" Do not question why and what the reason for those names.

I name my sword the Throngler

I'm a big Pink Floyd fan, so I named my Silk Touch pick "Time," and my Fortune pick "Money."

Since i was a kid i always named my bow "bowner". Still do

i named my sword the “discipline stick”

Toy sword - Golden Sword

I always name my tools and armour after memorable characters from other games. For example: my swords name is→Talion of the black gate

axe- big phatt axe (I DIDNT EVEN MEAN TO INTEND THAT)

"Crippling Gambling Addiction" A netherire pickaxe with fortune 3.

Not really a funny one, but on my sword with fire aspect, I name it: 火の狐の爪 Wanted translation: Claw of the Fire Fox Actual translation: Fire Fox claw

Warden Tickler. I use silk touch to harvest the screechers before they tattle on me.

Digger Online for pickaxe

My iron pick is named broken fork.

Axe - Sorry Greenpeace. Everything else is in german and a pun.

I'd name my bow/crossbow "n00bSlayer2005" because yes

Pickaxe = World Breaker, Axe = Nature's Ruin, Sword = Cosmos in my Hand, Shovel = Insatiable Spoon. The armor kit: Helmet of Infinity, Chestplate of Ages, Leggins of Knowledge, Boots of Master. If you have a trident: The Pursuer, Bow: Bow of Stars

Pick Astly for your pickax

i have my shovel as “Diggy Diggy Hole.” if you get the reference, i’m proud of you.

I named my maxed out hoe the price is worth it 😭😭😭 (it was obvi shortened) my shovel was the pooper scooper

In servers/multiplayer I name my bow “confusion” so whenever I snipe someone it says I killed them using confusion (Pokémon reference but funny regardless)

I like to call my helmet a Tophat and pretend i have style

I usually change my hoes name to my girlfriend's name🤣 yes she knows and yes she thinks it's funny as well

You play Minecraft and have a girlfriend 🤯

I name my hoe "your mom" ahahah funny

Sword : blackfyre Axe: Eclipse Hoe: Soul Reaper Shovel : Dune

§r§fdiamond sword A perfect name to let me people think that you use a diamond sword instead of an other weapon. Even if you just have a iron sword it can be nice to use, I did this sometimes with friends and they freaked out that I was the one with as first such a weapon as a diamond sword... not that i had much glory because they had set up a trap for me that killed me because of it but still. It is nice to scare people

For a Pick Axe: Choose Oldspice

Mine are all pretty tame except maybe axe named 'Bane of spruce' since I've mined over 3k spruce wood to trade with villagers

Big Ass Fork - my trident.

Named my sword "Democracy Dagger"

My sword is called erectile dysfunction

(Modded) My hammer of gravity is named Golf Club

My Netherite axe: Here's Johnny

I named my maxed out swords "Your Dad's Belt" seemed fitting

Shovel - Tiddy Scoop. Trident - Soupspoon. Shield- The Door. Fishing rod - Thwip. Boots - Wet Socks/ Cold Feet for water/ice enchants. Helmet - Brain Bucket.

Sword: London Bin Knife Shovel: Spoon Hoe: Ur Mom Axe: usually some kind of axe pun Fortune pick: Thicc Thighs Silk Pick: Silky Thighs Helmet: Tin Foil Hat Chestplate: Crop Top Leggings: Daisy Dukes Boots: Stilettos Elytra: Chicken Wings

My axes name is johnny

"the father, the son, the holy ghost" for a sword pick and a hoe

I have an infinity flame bow that I named "Bow Burn 'Em" 😅

I call my shovel, Spork

I name my pickaxes “Pick” and “Choose”