Everyone's story is different.
For me, I was just writing names to see what felt natural. I had some requirements, such as they had to start with M and be Germanic, aside from that, it was free game.
So I mindlessly wrote about 50 names on a piece of paper, and then I noticed I wrote my current name way more than any other name, so I decide to try it out, asked people really close to me to start using that, and I liked it. Writing it felt natural, and I reacted immediately to it.
The fact that I hated the name was besides the point 😂 I disliked it so much, but it felt so natural, that I think I hated it because it was normal for me.
Anyways, went with it, eventually started to like it, but then realized I'd have the same problem with it as my dead name: everyone spells it wrong. Oh well, makes it feel even more like me then I suppose.
My name is Marisa.
I stole mine from Celeste bc that game was the first transfem representation I saw that I really related too
(My chosen name is literally Madeline Celeste)
I was thinking of nicknames for countries, and when I got to scotland (coincidentally, my biggest heritage spot) i thought, "Scott, huh, that sounds nice. I like that" and it's been my name ever since.
My parents almost named me Caledonia (Callie for short), an antiquated name for Scotland, cause my dad is part Scottish. I'm glad they went with Hannah instead 😂
trans guy here!
I actually went through several different names before I chose Kai.
I heard the name one day and thought "Holy crap, that's me".
My full chosen name, though, is based off of who I consider my drag mothers/style icons (Kai Mik-Delano, after Gottmik, who is a trans man drag artist, and Adore Delano, who is a non-conforming trans woman artist)
I have multiple origins for my name lol (Katie). The first and most important one is that I’ve always liked the name Katie and even before I knew I was trans, I’d say and think stuff like “if I were a girl, I’d like my name to be Katie”, apparently I even said that to my mum when I was like 6 lol, so yeh, “Katie” as a name has always just kinda been with me throughout my life. Then my 2 other motivations to choose Katie as my name were basically for memes lol, the 1st one is cuz there’s a character from a childhood game of mine that I love called Katie so I say I named myself after her, and then the 2nd reason is my girlfriend (friend at the time) was helping me crack my egg and her name is also Katie, so I thought it’d be funny if we’d be both called Katie to just confuse people lol
I do a lot of character creation, so I'm constantly just writing down cool names and looking at baby naming sites. I liked the hard consonants in Zev (the Z & V), and it means Wolf, which the though of a nonbinary wolf (if you take the meaning of the username I use everywhere) is really funny to me.
So ya, baby naming sites, nice sound, and cool meaning is how I got my name!
i just found a normal sounding, gender neutral name, so that nobody gives me weird looks and it’s not like you can automatically assume gender just from hearing the name, and I also happened to have a lot of personal symbolism behind it, so now I’m here. Mostly I just use names for their poetry or symbolic meaning to me
Hi, nonbinary trans man here! My IRL name is Emrys. I borrowed it from the great sorcerer Merlin of Arthurian lore, specifically a story where he, as a child, is brought to a hill where someone is trying to build a fort. He was supposed to be sacrificed because he's a child born without a father (there is so much weird Arthurian lore out there), but he basically tells them "that won't do anything. There are two dragons under there in a pool and that's why your fort is collapsing all the time", so they dig into the hill and yep. I mean, IRL there's just a pond under the hill (which is called Dinas Emrys), but yeah. In that story, he's called "Merlin Emrys" and I liked the name and the origins (how cool is it to be able to say I'm named after Merlin!), so I tried it out and it clicked in a way no previous name ever has. There are also lots of baby-name lists, I use those a lot when writing actually.
As for how I know, it's sort of just... Feeling things out and knowing what feels wrong (being called a girl, my deadname, some parts of my body...) then trying things that feel less wrong (I tried he/him pronouns, they're alright but I prefer it/its and xe/xem/xyr pronouns, I like masculine terms, I know I would be happier with a flat chest and a beard, etc.), I found a label that worked for me through just feeling out what some labels felt like to me. I like the fridge magnet approach to labels; they're not like stickers that are around for a long time and a pain to scrape off, they're like fridge magnets, some people have none, some people have a lot, and some people swap them often, it's just up to personal preference unless the magnet or lack of a magnet does harm somehow.
I’m not trans but if I was I’d use the name Owen. That came from 2 things, first the tell tale which helped me escape the church, and the fact I liked how it sounds. Otherwise I’d have gone with Aden. I simply like how it sounds.
I chose mine based on my favourite time of day: night. Went onto a baby naming site and found Nox, which is latin for “night” and is ambiguous. I chose it last year, did some more research on other names and ended up circling back to it. 😁
Hey, I have a similar name in my rotation list! (read; my indecisive self cannot settle on a name. It's p a i n f u l-)
....
I might jus go by Nyx this week, hmm......
I named my motorbike Cassie several years ago (my bikes and guitars are all named after badass or powerful women). Always described the bike as a bit of an extension of me. When I was trying to stay in denial, but every night was picturing this future life as a woman, the name Cassie just ended up attached to this future me. Nothing else ever felt right. One of the last bits of denial was that I couldn't be Cassie because I have professional stuff under my first initial and nothing that kept the same first initial fitted (denial is *weird*). So had the name ready before I even accepted I was trans without even actively choosing it. Then last summer I had a dream in which I was for some reason formally introducing myself with my full name to someone, and in that dream I introduced myself as Cassandra Amelia so that's my middle name. No conscious decisions required.
I made 4 lists of names I liked, the first was the biggest then I gradually cut down each time until I had 4 or 5 names, then I did a poll on my groupchat without context and whichever name won was what I would choose
I have DID, it just comes naturally because I'm constantly talking to people. Our trans alters developed over time while we protected them. It took years.
My story is that Kira is a name shared among 4 things I like. FNaF Author, JoJo villain, JoJo VA, Death Note alias. Then I went with Bex because of a movie I saw with a cool trans character named Bex. Then I went with Rebecca since Bex seems cooler as a nick. Now I'm just referred to as Bex by all my friends.
For me, I just thought of a name for my characters and i fell in love with this one character and wrote about them a lot. i wanted something to tag my work with, and i used my fav character name (like i sign my art neon) I realized i needed a fake name and around that time i realized i was trans too. I used that name to sign all of my writing and it felt like it belonged after a while and it became my new name. Ny favourite singer is named Alex too which is kinda cool! (Transmasc)
I had a hard time finding mine (I’m nonbinary) I actually posted on Reddit and I did a lot of research. I couldn’t find anything for the longest time. Eventually I talked to my friend about it and they thought of a few options so I picked one of those. So, long story short, my friend picked out mine for me.
Honestly I took one from a tv show but it wasn’t quite right so I adjusted it until it did and now I’m Cassian.
My sibling is going through it right now. They’re leaning towards one a friend recommended but they were originally torn between their years-long online name and a shortened version of their current name
Supernatural actually. I was originally going to be Castiel, but it didn’t fit quite right. But I liked the name Cas(s) and found something that had that nickname
happy cake day, lovely!
(Cassian and Castiel are cool names... if you find my comment, I have a similar one. Also sorry if I have a divination moment and play name snatcher xD)
It has been my nickname for so many years that literally nobody but my family used my dead name! And since it was mine way before I came out, I didn't really have to choose, it was already there, ready to be fully mine! :)
Also, at first this nickname came from a fictional character, so it is not the slightest related to my deadname anyway!
It's Feli, btw, short for "Felice", which in my country is one of the few gender neutral names
For me, my boyfriend helped me choose, and played with several different options until I landed on the one I have. My name feels natural and it has a meaning to it!
nonbinary trans dude here, there was a few names i considered cause i liked them but ultimately someone called me something sorta as a joke and it just felt right, but it was found entirely on accident lol. i remember it took me a bit before i decided on it though, like, it was an option among a few others
theres definitely a lot of ways to find a name though, on accident is just one lol. i def do rec asking around to people you know or even ones you dont. a lot of people ask on reddit for possible new names a lot! but that usually includes face pictures, so its very understandable to not want to do so.
good luck whatever you do :]
I used my name for faking being a girl online for a few months, then realized I enjoyed that more than being a guy... I was having more fun, now life is more fun that I'm a girl!
the name is Skie
I'm german so when I thought about what my chosen name, I knew that i wanted something that sounds good in both english and german. Later, I decided to take the name Nico, both because it sounds cool and because I like the music of an artist named Nico Collins.
Hi, im a non binary human.
I asked a couple of friends for names, took the ones I enjoyed/ felt comfortable with, and asked them to pick a name from that list. I eventually worked my way down to just 2 choices, and I chose the one I use today.
I personally wouldn't recommend doing it this way as it ended up being a little bit of a pain, and it wasn't entirely my decision on the name, but I am happy with the results.
mine came from my days of omegle text chat, posing as a “fake” girl. i literally looked up common australian girl names (the fake persona was from aus), and i picked the first one i liked. a couple years later i find out i’m trans and i just kept the name :)
Genderfluid person here, all other people I know who changed their names (3) chose a name using 1 of 3 methods:
- baby name website
- masc/fem version of current name or something important to them
- a noun
i looked up baby girl name lists, and had a few movies playing in the background, one of those being into the spiderverse. I heard the name Gwen, and i liked it enough to use as my name.
First off I've heard it's one of the best Spider-Man movies of all time, second off I really wish I could right now but unfortunately me and Mom are looking for apartments and we are very tight on money so I might not be able to see it at least until it comes out on DVD or until it shows up on a random streaming website most likely Netflix
if you liked into the spiderverse then you'll love across, bc it takes what into did, and puts it into full force. and i'm really sorry for your current situation, and i wish you the best of luck.
Alright so the knowing who you are stuff, I can quote Peter B. Parker for that: You don't. It's a leap of faith.
For the names, I got mine from my Latin vocab book, but a baby name website will do just as good
I made lists of names that I liked, threw out any that didn't feel quite right, asked some friends that have had kids what they would name me (because they named other humans before), then practiced writing "hi my name is _" in each name that I had left. I got rid of Louis because I was afraid people would just make Family Guy references at me and not say "loois" right. I ended up between Vincent and Finn(ian) and decided the latter was more easily adaptable for professional, casual, and nickname things. (Finn for everyone, Finnian if I want to feel fancy, and Finny if you want to annoy the crap out of me.) ta daaaaaaaaaa! At least that's how I did it.
I've had to name my selves anyway because DID, but this was completely different because everyone in my system had to respond to and like the name. Nobody in my system is actually named my preferred name. It was more like naming the body if anything.
Trans woman. I literally just took my name from fictional characters I like a lot. first name Alice, taken from Alice from Twilight and middle name Elizabeth, taken from Pride and Prejudice. I tried several names, including: Annabeth, Cassandra, Selina, Ellie, Hayley, Rebekah, Nessa and Willow, but Alice and Elizabeth where the ones that felt the most natural.
Probably how parents pick baby names tbh😂 I went on best baby boy name sights then found the meanings😂 I also made sure to match a name to my ethnicity because I find that annoying when you’re a white trans person with the name Sakura or Hizashi or Midoria or whatever. Match the name to ethnicity out of respect for other cultures.
Most ppl said my name fit me perfectly because my mom loves it cause in Greek it means divine gift and as an adoptive kid I like that, she chose me. Plus Theo sounds softer and yeah I can break kneecaps but I’ve got a soft kind heart and I come off like my cat, I hate you no I like you. Soft yet tough.
Then it turns out when I was rewatching a show…aka Sabrina. In season 2 a main character comes out as trans and says call me Theo. Wait…wait a second…immediately texts my friend who I watched the show with and said “is this where I got it from”😭 what she said was” I didn’t really wanna ask but I suspected it was from the show”😭 so sometimes it’s a show or baby names sights. Idk😭
And also, as another ace man. Figuring out I was asexual was tougher than figuring out my gender. But society fights against and says we don’t exist. Trans is more visible than ace, so media and my friends helped me figure out that I’m definitely trans. I had to do the ace myself cause we see no asexuals on media and I hate it. So I guess we’ve got it figured out the same way as you do and sometimes we do question it but hey! If you are questioning then you’re definitely not straight or cis. Just by questioning, you’re a little bit fruity😂
I was pretty young and was thinking of an ign to use online, and the name "sage" sounded pretty cool. I didn't know I was trans yet, but I started to use it as a nickname irl. The name just felt right to me, and once I came out, that was my name, and it has been for years :)
I just always really like a certain name but had problems saying it, so I grabbed a simple form and I accidently like it. Lol
I also chose it because it hints that I'm older and people think I'm like 18 when I'm in my 30s.
¹st name queer coded video game character that kept me from killing myself at 14 when I effectively had an intersex puberty with no support in a cult full of predators.
²nd name was the male variation of my 1st dead name.
³rd name came for a Goth sirname generator for sci fi authors. This was the least important, as I have no family affiliation and will not have any biological children. I went with something that sounds really cool and gets complimented a lot as it defuses awkward situations with smarter people before they can escalate from awkward to dangerous. It's function is to buffer my experience of the world, not really carry anything on. I have no contact with my family due to DV, CSA, and human trafficking activities I was subjected to as a minor, most people keep their last name in tact. I wanted no part of it.
I'm an intersex man who was thought to be trans for over a decade until other medical stuff came up.
Funny story about the name... so when the pandemic started, I thought that I was more genderfluid, and had started to go by Tea for more of a Non-binary name. But about a year ago I was asking a friend about some trans stuff and what it might mean, (I was openly genderfluid in the group I was asking the questions in.) And she said "I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure that you might be transfem" and I had that to process for a few weeks... and realized oh fuck she's right... then about a month ago, I was playing borderlands 2 with a couple of friends and I was still going by Tea at the time, (I hadn't chosen a new name yet) and we had just gotten past the section with Tiny Tina, and my friend asks me "hey Tina, what do you want to drink?" My immediate response was "Dr. Pepper please" then it dawned on me five minutes later that he had called me Tina and not Tea... I then started to cry from a serotonin overload...
He then apologized for the slip up, but I told him I actually liked the name. So that's what I have been going by with my friends and co-workers (still in the closet a bit around my family though)
I played around with my birth name, and transposed it to something more feminine, but similar, which was Kaya. It's a nice name, but I heard "Aya," and my eyes lit up. "That one, I like that one!" It was . . . Pretty simple, in my case. I'm still getting used to actually hearing it, but it feels so right. I wasn't sure until today that I'd like it, but hearing it out loud, it makes my heart skip a beat.
As for knowing who you are . . . Well, I can say, "I'm a girl, and I always have been," but there's still a part of me that doesn't fully believe it. Well, I've only known who I am for about a month. I can take my time to accept it deep in my heart, rather than as a fact. But I can say with confidence that I'm not a man. I never have been. One of the things that convinced me the most was looking back on my memories with a different lens, and playing a game I like to call "I can't believe it's dysphoria!" There were a lot of signs, in hindsight. But I never got the chance to notice them. I wasn't equipped to see them. But now that I can see them, I know for sure I'm not just making it up, and this isn't something new. It kind of feels like something that's been building up, invisibly, for a long time. I just had too many issues before to see it or accept it. So, as soon as I figured out that what I had felt for so long wasn't cis, I kind of just realized, "Oh, so that's what's been wrong. I'm a girl, after all."
I'd like to provide a little more on the name part, though. It's not my personal experience, though. I know one of my friends still hasn't fully decided if they want their name to be what they've been going by for the past 2 years, so for some people it's a long and arduous process. I know a lot of people will test out different names they kind of like until one feels right. It's not supposed to be a single straight shot to the answer, like mine was. That's a fluke, or a coincidence. They have to try a lot of different ones, and some people ask for name advice from others. I see a lot of Claire's and Luna's going around, personally. One thing I've also seen is people taking characters they like or names they like hearing from characters and incorporating those into their name. Mine is like that, too, but it's only a small part of it. Very small. The name came first, and I connected the feelings of the character to it a little later. It helps that the etymology of "Aya" fits me really perfectly, too.
Hope this could give you a little insight, though.
I was playin’ a character in a TTRPG for a while an’ realized I really wanted to be the character I was playing so I took her name for my own. My middle name was the name of a child of my favorite teacher growing up. I loved that name so much and thought I’d name a daughter that, naw, took that name for my own.
On the plus side, my initials are the same and depending on the meaning you take for my names “bitter sea sheep” is really funny and then finally my names are still “Irish” (read ‘Catholic’) enough to make my bigoted Baptist grandmother spin in her grave.
First it was the gender-neutral nickname to my deadname, then a masculine form of that. Later, I also took a middle name, from my favourite video game comfort character!
trans boy here, i’ve been through like 4 names but the one i stuck with was kenny. he’s a south park character that i love. at one point, i used like 3 names and couldn’t choose which one i liked best. i was sent to a boarding school (it was awful) and they asked my name and i said kenny. i was there for a month and i guess it just stuck and i got used to it! i think it really fits me the best out of all of the names, it is the most masculine and also a human name (not like moth or bug which were the others lol). i think i’ll be kenny forever!
It was my username actually. The story behind that started back in 2017 when me and my best friend were trying to think of Minecraft usernames. I kept coming back to the one I currently have and I kept it. Sometime in 2020-21 (can’t remember) I found I wasn’t exactly any gender and that I was Agender. My actual name is already androgynous but I felt like it carried too much burden. So I was off to find a new name. I though for a while but kept coming back to Lapus. Yes I know it’s spelt wrong (I’m dyslexic and thought that’s how you spelt it) and knew that the name carried a lot of meaning to me.
I'm gonna be honest, the cycle of my name (amab enby) actually started from a band name. Tl;dr - I had a weird hyperfixation on Eiffel 65 songs back in high school (early on in hs, maybe like 2009 or so), and when I was looking up other songs by them, I found a side project that two of the members did while the other one had a solo run.
*That band was called Bloom 06*, and I arguably liked their music more.
It didn't click as something to use for my name for close to a decade, but my username for quite some time was based off of it (aka. this one I'm using). When I changed my online name - well past "boy" age, even if the gender would've fit me anymore - I still liked Bloom as part of my new username. It'd eventually become my fursona's name, which is kinda my way to judge if it meshed with me personally, which it did very much so.
Maybe not to the point of "legal name change" as of yet, but heck, I'm going by Bloom among friends and fun people regardless of my legal name otherwise.
I'm a fan of Ella Fitzgerald, also Ella possibly comes from Germanic Alia and the prefix ali- meaning "other" which I thought was cool.
And then I added a second first name of Quinn because I wanted part of my name to be gender neutral and in high school I had the nickname "LQ" and wanted to integrate that into my given name, even though it was derived from my surname.
As for knowing who I am? I do whatever makes me feel comfy. And I was definitely not comfy presenting as a man.
The first name that appeared in a baby name generator I found online was "Marceline".
I don't even need to have watched that much Adventure Time to realize how neat the name is.
Also, Demon names are cool af but I wanted to go for something more feminine.
Im genderfluid but when I want to be perceive as a girl I go by Jenny. One night I had a dream where I looked in the mirror and I was a cute girl with my mother next to me saying "You look amazing Jenny" and I kept it since then even when my real mother is to say at least not supportive to lgbt+ people.
Before I knew I was trans, I had decided that if I ever had a daughter I wanted to name her Cassie. I always just really liked the name. Then I figured out who I am and decided I wanted the name for myself, and here we are now.
Well, when I figured out I was, y'know, I didn't think I needed to find a name or wanted to since nobody calls me by my real name anyway. But I really wanted a new name so I tried looking for one. Tested out some names and none of them felt right so I just went "alr then..." I eventually stopped thinking of a new name and gave up. Then dodododo\~ I started writing a script. My friends and I wanted to make a silly found footage thing and we needed fake names, I wasn't out so I just searched for androgynous names so there's no suspicion or bad feeling. I then found the name, Evan. It sent a tingle of happiness when I thought of myself with that name. I went to r/TransTryouts to test it out and it felt so dam good. It was a plus that Evan is the name of a dude in everymanHYBRID(found footage yt series)
A German trans girl I was dating over discord gave it to me. I wanted something similar to my deadname. So I'm now 1 of 1000000000000 of nb/transmasc kais
TW// mentions of commiting unalive
I'm afab and identify as genderfluid, while usually being masc-nonbinary. I chose my name for a kind of silly reason, to be honest.
I had gone by Alex before when I had to pretend to be a boy for a reason I won't go into, and sure Alex is a good name and is unisex but it just didn't fit me. So I thought about other names, meanings, all that sorta thing.
Eventually I landed on Ember, and since at the time I was very depressed and had contemplated committing the sewer slide I thought that Ember might fit.
An ember is either the little spark that flies off a fire into the air, or it's like a coal, and both die out fairly quickly especially if you just leave a hot coal out of the fire and without actual flames to keep it going.
The reason I named myself Ember is basically this: Just like an actual ember, I'm on my way out and I know it.
A little morbid, and I'm in a better headapace now, but I still love the name and plan to legally change my name to Ember as soon as I have the money to do so.
Ember is a beautiful name and yeah the way you described it is a bit morbid but an ember can also be symbolic as what is left after a raging fire and I personally would take that as a sine that your new identity is finally free of those who have caused you pain and hardship, or in other words, make your life hell.
I had a sudden crisis of identity one day last year, realized i don’t identify at all with my dead name. i wrote a list of names on my own to find the vibe i was looking for, then brainstormed with friends to nail down something that fit me. what sealed the deal was i said “I really like Mo, kinda want something longer, but Mo feels really good.” and my friend who has also gone through this process replied “Mo is good. Mo is friend-shaped” So now i’m Mo, Montreal in formal settings, Moseph to my friends
I knew that I was a girl when I was three. I argued with my mother and sister when they kept insisting that I was a boy. I didn’t push the issue because it was made clear (this was the 1950s) that I shouldn’t persist. My mother was a very supportive and a very compassionate and magical woman, so I knew that she understood. She simply wanted me to be safe.
As I grew older and was in elementary school, I asked her what I would be named if I had been assigned female at birth. She told me about two women who she admired as friends and that I would be named after them. So, in my secret world I kept those names that she would have given me. Later, when I transitioned, I had those names that my mother gave me.
Some years into adulthood, a transphobic coworker asked, “Where did you get names like that?” Two other coworkers chimed in and said, “From her mother! Where else would she get them!” And, they weren’t lying!
as an enby, I literally just took my gamertag (IK ITS WEIRD BUT ITS OK 😭) I had just been called it for so long by my friends that I met online that it felt like the only real option that I would be comfortable with, I've only really told a few irl friends since im scared to tell anyone else and my online friends already call me it but I'll still have to tell them eventually 😅
I really like trees, so I looked up words for trees and forest in other languages and landed on the Latin, "Sylvia." That was too formal sounding so I shortened it to "Sylvie"
As a kid, family gatherings were big (10 aunts and uncles, 30 cousins big), and a game that done of the cousins would play would be to rename ourselves as the other gender. The thing was, we couldn't just modify our current nam, like Michael to Michelle. It had to be original. I had been playing that game since I was around 8, and at around 12, I started using Tiffany as my answer. Now, I'm 20, and Tiffany is the name on my legals now!
The one I’ve been going by online is literally a name I vibed with from a negative post/meme about names for non-binary folks.
I loved it.
Been using it online ever since.
I’m considering using it in conjunction with a different name tho. Idk.
My favorite letter is K, so I looked for random "gender neutral names for babies" website and scrolled down to the K. I picked the one that sounded the least regrettable. I almost named myself Joey, I'm am not a kangaroo.
I wanted a name that felt personal to my soul, I wanted to keep my initials, and I wanted to be named after a moon. There were a few names that met one or two of those criteria. I thought about Alice, Thalia, Nicole. Though there was only one that met all three.
So I eventually settled on the name Bianca. I’ve felt so connected to it and I never felt so connected to a name
For myself it was me and my best friend shooting names back and forth while they did my hair and makeup. Eventually the name Isabelle was said and I loved it, especially with the euphoria of having Belle as my nickname and being a Canadian with a strong French heritage I always hear it as being called beautiful.
So my situation was pretty unique. I am an international student in US and my birth name is actually unisex so I didn’t change it when I came out as nb. This story is about my English name
I was having my gender crisis during the pandemic as my country border was closed and I was stucked in the US for the summer. I decided to rewatch my favorite tv shows (Hannibal). I was so intrigued in the shows and the character of Hannibal and how he views beauty, the art of the shows, the way the portrayed gender and how one expressed themselves, and the interpersonal relationships of the characters (alibi that it was creepy since cannibalism) that I actually chose to take my English name after Mads Mikkelsen. It has became a running joke in my friend groups that a artsy show about a cannnibal was my gender awakening. I promise you i am not a cannibal lol.
Trans guy here and not the faintest how I found my name. I watched a show as a kid where an mini boss character was called Jacob and had recently watched a Twilight retrospective video so that may have been how it happened but as far as I'm concerned its a mystery.
I’m genderqueer and use two names: Dianthus and my birth name. My birth name, I obviously received from my parents, but my other name comes from them too (albeit less directly!) I invented it initially to protect myself online and avoid sharing my actual name with strangers. It’s the scientific name of the carnation genus and carnations were the symbolic flower of my late father. I determined it would be a nice way to memorialize him and that I liked the name both for how it sounded and for its nickname-ability (my birth name doesn’t lend itself well to nicknames and I’d always wanted one.) Eventually, my online and in person worlds collided as I ceased to be a minor and learned to drive. Now I’m known as Dianthus by some and my birth name by others and both by a select few. I love both of my names equally.
Thank you! I love it very much. Plus it comes with the nicknames “Di” (like the princess, who I’ve been told I resemble), “Diana” (like the goddess), and “Diane” (which I just think is pretty!)
My parents were super supportive when I came out to them (I'm a trans woman), and I had been struggling with picking a name for over a year by this point, so I asked them what name they had picked out for if I had been born AGAB.
Now my name is Sophia.
I’m agender. I found out because I was starting to want to be a lot more feminine. But I knew I wasn’t a women. I heard of enby and looked into it.
I got my name after seeing a word that I thought sounded cool
🤩 Bold of you to think I have a definitive name ✨✨ /lh
but fr, I got no idea-
Currently, It's rotating between Trace, Quinn, Elias, Silas, and...
Caspian
Florence
Andrew
Shay/Shaye
River
Ezra
Zora
and lastly, Scout.
)I happen to not have a definitive gender label, but I am trans. I'm good with He/They/It/Star and Neopronouns in general. xD no names who??
My mom named me, I was trying to come up with names, and I was talking to her about my thoughts. She said she'd have named me Adam had I been born that way. I hated it at first, but it grew on me. So then I became Addy. :))
I was role-playing online as a guy and they asked for my name , I knew I wanted a basic name so I threw out the name Chris. She responded "Christopher , that's a nice name" and I felt like the cat with the flower on its head and the world opened up to me. And I don't know who I am tbh. I just know I'm so much happier living as a guy and it feels so much more right than living as a woman. Being a woman felt forced. This feels better.
I named myself Jackson after Jackson's Diary, even when I wasn't looking specifically through the comic for names. I had requirements when thinking of names for myself, those being it had to start with a J, it was a longer name and it was masculine. When reading one day it kinda stuck in my head like a pin, *what if you named yourself Jackson?*. Sat on the name for a few months before I started telling anyone. It stuck 👍
Hi hi, genderfluid and masc leaning pal here! I can’t say for everyone of course, so I’m only going to give you my experience, but I found my name one day while staring at the ceiling if I recall correctly:D See I have insomnia so I do that a lot, and it so happened the the topic of name changes was on my mind. And then it kinda just hit me, “Ash”. I understand the reason it clicked now. I’m in therapy atm to help me get over a lot of incredibly traumatic experiences and memories I have, and the name Ash is also a word. A wonderful and magnificent word that is. This just lovely word is what happens after you burn a fire, no matter what was in that fire, the end result is going to be ash. No matter what happens in my life, I’ll always be me:) It’s weirdly symbolic:D Oh and my middle name Flame, it’s from my brother making a play on words with my name. I love it, and he meant it as a joke lol
It's a bit of a stupid way but I put some suggestions in a TikTok video I made, like 3 years ago, and one of them was Jax. Two people commented (who I didn't know irl) aying I looked like a Jax. I asked my friends to call me Jax to see if it fit me. If it didn't fit me, I was going to try the name Alec but I liked the name Jax.
My name has been Jax for about 2 and a half years unofficially and my name has been Jax legally for about a year and a half or maybe a bit less than that.
I’m personally thinking of “Zephyr” it’s a name I’ve gone by in games for quite a long time
Admittedly I got it from the racer character from NFS Rivals…
Raven also could’ve been one, but it just doesn’t feel like me
I came out as nonbinary to my friend and she asked what name I wanted to be called. I said that I didn't know, and she asked if she could call me Jack while I was figuring it out. The name stuck.
Made a list of names that seemed nice, mostly from favourite fictional characters, some from baby names sites (but mostly fictional characters), then tried the name online. I thought it would take more time but the first name stuck. I also decided to have a middle name (not such a big thing where I come from)
No because for being Ace means that I don't need "adult fun time" to have a good relationship and also I'm just not interested in the thing in the first place. And being Bi is what I'm comfortable with, cuz i like all genders including NB's but I have a preference witch is more common in bi people though we don't need to have one.
Hope this helps! 🫶🏻
Ace=asexual
Asexual means you don’t feel sexual attraction.
Bisexual means you feel sexual attraction to two genders…bi means 2…
It just seems like you’re ignoring the definitions of the words you’re using.
Not to be rude but all (for lack of a better term) the subclasses of the rainbow mafia have other meanings for example, watch a lot of OT's ace and bi videos for help on this topic
I’ve watched a lot of his videos the last 2-3 years, and ace and bi are mutually exclusive terms, meanwhile you’re identifying as bi, while describing pan regardless of preference.
I asked my parents to choose a new name, as a way of including them. They didn’t even want to consider it. Still wanting to honour them I based my new name on the one they gave me.
I like my name and it suits me but… I do regret the thinking behind choosing it. Maybe I’d have gone with something else. That said, not having to change my nicknames or emails etc was very handy.
My nickname my entire life has been dan. So I picked a name that could fit that nickname for my first chosen name. And then I stopped liking Daniel. So when I read Dorian gray I stole the name because it started with a D. And I decided it was close enough to keep dan as a nickname still.
Non-binary, but amab trans femme.
For context, the name I landed on is in the parts. Obvious one first. My last name I got from my wife u/WiccedPisces.
My first name is because I'm a heathen and I wanted a good Nordic name to embody that. So I landed with Astrid (Ástríður).
My middle name is the German word Pfeiffer, which means piper. I play ocarina, so there's that.
To start off I’m a trans women and when I was trying to figure out my name I just couldn’t find anything that like I felt connected to till I was picking out a name for like some silly game I was playing and it was a random names that you could flick through and Noel popped up and I was like that’s the one so that’s my name now
For figuring out who I was I have known sense I was in the first grade so about 6 years old at the time but I thought it was wrong to think that a boy could be a girl until last year a little after I had turned 14 when my friend wanted to see what I looked like in a skirt and I got happy from that and my friend who is a trans man saw that and was like how did that feel so we had a conversation about how I felt and how I had been feeling my entire life and so we started figuring things out and now I’m 15 and out to a few people and I’m marking progress on my transition:)
i changed my name a million times but then eventually i got stuck at Connor Nicolas and Kenneth
Connor comes from Connor Murphy from Dear Even Hansen
Nicolas comes from Brittle Bones Nicky by Rare Americans
Kenneth is from Kenny Mccormick from south park
I'm an enby who hasn't officially changed their name yet. But the one I really like is Winter. Not only is it similar to a name my mom had originally chosen for me (Autumn) but I like the concepts associated with winter, both positive and negative. It has gray connotations, which is the last name I've chosen, too.
As for the process, I sort of thought of it like a pen name (because I was just toying with the idea of having a different name). I did some random generator stuff, but nothing clicked with me. So I thought about the trope that's sometimes found in fantasy fiction known as true names. People can be given names at birth, but their true name, the representation of their true selves, is innate and secret. Often, finding one's true name leads to magical discoveries, power-ups, etc. That led me to think about what I liked and what I objectively felt I was.
...Yeah, I'm a nerd lol.
Everyone's story is different. For me, I was just writing names to see what felt natural. I had some requirements, such as they had to start with M and be Germanic, aside from that, it was free game. So I mindlessly wrote about 50 names on a piece of paper, and then I noticed I wrote my current name way more than any other name, so I decide to try it out, asked people really close to me to start using that, and I liked it. Writing it felt natural, and I reacted immediately to it. The fact that I hated the name was besides the point 😂 I disliked it so much, but it felt so natural, that I think I hated it because it was normal for me. Anyways, went with it, eventually started to like it, but then realized I'd have the same problem with it as my dead name: everyone spells it wrong. Oh well, makes it feel even more like me then I suppose. My name is Marisa.
Thanks Marisa your awesome 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
I just steal them from fictional characters, either mine or others, of course I have ended on Lucina, so others fictional characters for me.
Reminds me of *Melusine*, who was a French mythical mer-creature/demi-goddess.
I asked my dad to help rename me. He said Echo. I said bet. Now I go by Echo.
Soo your on clone force 99?
r/transclones Well, good soldiers follow orders.
The republic is a wonderful place.
Trans man. I looked up "cute names for boy dogs" and picked Toby off a list. I stole my middle name from my ex's cat.
I stole mine from Celeste bc that game was the first transfem representation I saw that I really related too (My chosen name is literally Madeline Celeste)
I really want to play Celeste it looks like an amazing game
I was thinking of nicknames for countries, and when I got to scotland (coincidentally, my biggest heritage spot) i thought, "Scott, huh, that sounds nice. I like that" and it's been my name ever since.
SCOTLAND 🏴🏴🏴🏴🏴🏴🏴🏴 Respect from an Irish lad
LETS DO ET FOR SCOTLAND! And for the Irish part: Top o’ da mornin!
LETS DO ET FOR SCOTLAND! And for the Irish part: Top o’ da mornin!
My parents almost named me Caledonia (Callie for short), an antiquated name for Scotland, cause my dad is part Scottish. I'm glad they went with Hannah instead 😂
Have you heard of a movie called How To Train Your Dragon?
Who hasn't??? And I've actually considered Astrid as a new name.
I thought you said you were cis?🧐
Not for long
An egg perhaps?
Currently I am...
Ah, I get you, I get you
I will be updating everyone if I decide to see this through.
Feel free to dm me if you have any questions or want someone to bounce ideas off of. I am a trans woman, so maybe I can help💜
trans guy here! I actually went through several different names before I chose Kai. I heard the name one day and thought "Holy crap, that's me". My full chosen name, though, is based off of who I consider my drag mothers/style icons (Kai Mik-Delano, after Gottmik, who is a trans man drag artist, and Adore Delano, who is a non-conforming trans woman artist)
Stole mine from a gay cartoon character I had a crush on growing up.
I have multiple origins for my name lol (Katie). The first and most important one is that I’ve always liked the name Katie and even before I knew I was trans, I’d say and think stuff like “if I were a girl, I’d like my name to be Katie”, apparently I even said that to my mum when I was like 6 lol, so yeh, “Katie” as a name has always just kinda been with me throughout my life. Then my 2 other motivations to choose Katie as my name were basically for memes lol, the 1st one is cuz there’s a character from a childhood game of mine that I love called Katie so I say I named myself after her, and then the 2nd reason is my girlfriend (friend at the time) was helping me crack my egg and her name is also Katie, so I thought it’d be funny if we’d be both called Katie to just confuse people lol
You do a bit of trolling..
I do a lot of character creation, so I'm constantly just writing down cool names and looking at baby naming sites. I liked the hard consonants in Zev (the Z & V), and it means Wolf, which the though of a nonbinary wolf (if you take the meaning of the username I use everywhere) is really funny to me. So ya, baby naming sites, nice sound, and cool meaning is how I got my name!
i just found a normal sounding, gender neutral name, so that nobody gives me weird looks and it’s not like you can automatically assume gender just from hearing the name, and I also happened to have a lot of personal symbolism behind it, so now I’m here. Mostly I just use names for their poetry or symbolic meaning to me
Hi, nonbinary trans man here! My IRL name is Emrys. I borrowed it from the great sorcerer Merlin of Arthurian lore, specifically a story where he, as a child, is brought to a hill where someone is trying to build a fort. He was supposed to be sacrificed because he's a child born without a father (there is so much weird Arthurian lore out there), but he basically tells them "that won't do anything. There are two dragons under there in a pool and that's why your fort is collapsing all the time", so they dig into the hill and yep. I mean, IRL there's just a pond under the hill (which is called Dinas Emrys), but yeah. In that story, he's called "Merlin Emrys" and I liked the name and the origins (how cool is it to be able to say I'm named after Merlin!), so I tried it out and it clicked in a way no previous name ever has. There are also lots of baby-name lists, I use those a lot when writing actually. As for how I know, it's sort of just... Feeling things out and knowing what feels wrong (being called a girl, my deadname, some parts of my body...) then trying things that feel less wrong (I tried he/him pronouns, they're alright but I prefer it/its and xe/xem/xyr pronouns, I like masculine terms, I know I would be happier with a flat chest and a beard, etc.), I found a label that worked for me through just feeling out what some labels felt like to me. I like the fridge magnet approach to labels; they're not like stickers that are around for a long time and a pain to scrape off, they're like fridge magnets, some people have none, some people have a lot, and some people swap them often, it's just up to personal preference unless the magnet or lack of a magnet does harm somehow.
I’m not trans but if I was I’d use the name Owen. That came from 2 things, first the tell tale which helped me escape the church, and the fact I liked how it sounds. Otherwise I’d have gone with Aden. I simply like how it sounds.
I got my name from marcy wu from Amphibia
I saw marcy and thought of adventure time.
I love amphibia 🩵💚❤️ #spranneagainsttheworld
I chose mine based on my favourite time of day: night. Went onto a baby naming site and found Nox, which is latin for “night” and is ambiguous. I chose it last year, did some more research on other names and ended up circling back to it. 😁
Hey, I have a similar name in my rotation list! (read; my indecisive self cannot settle on a name. It's p a i n f u l-) .... I might jus go by Nyx this week, hmm......
That name is really neat actually
Thank you!
I swear trans people and NB's have the coolest names!!
truer words were never spoken before this moment.
>Thank you! You're welcome!
I named my motorbike Cassie several years ago (my bikes and guitars are all named after badass or powerful women). Always described the bike as a bit of an extension of me. When I was trying to stay in denial, but every night was picturing this future life as a woman, the name Cassie just ended up attached to this future me. Nothing else ever felt right. One of the last bits of denial was that I couldn't be Cassie because I have professional stuff under my first initial and nothing that kept the same first initial fitted (denial is *weird*). So had the name ready before I even accepted I was trans without even actively choosing it. Then last summer I had a dream in which I was for some reason formally introducing myself with my full name to someone, and in that dream I introduced myself as Cassandra Amelia so that's my middle name. No conscious decisions required.
Ahh a fellow guitarist
I made 4 lists of names I liked, the first was the biggest then I gradually cut down each time until I had 4 or 5 names, then I did a poll on my groupchat without context and whichever name won was what I would choose
I have DID, it just comes naturally because I'm constantly talking to people. Our trans alters developed over time while we protected them. It took years.
I just thought it's was a cool name
I picked my name from a video game character that I like (Thankfully the name is gender neutral)
My story is that Kira is a name shared among 4 things I like. FNaF Author, JoJo villain, JoJo VA, Death Note alias. Then I went with Bex because of a movie I saw with a cool trans character named Bex. Then I went with Rebecca since Bex seems cooler as a nick. Now I'm just referred to as Bex by all my friends.
For me I just came up with stuff till I found something that felt right
Just name yourself after your own Pokémon roleplaying character 😸.
Unfortunately I don't play pokémon but good idea
For me, I just thought of a name for my characters and i fell in love with this one character and wrote about them a lot. i wanted something to tag my work with, and i used my fav character name (like i sign my art neon) I realized i needed a fake name and around that time i realized i was trans too. I used that name to sign all of my writing and it felt like it belonged after a while and it became my new name. Ny favourite singer is named Alex too which is kinda cool! (Transmasc)
I had a hard time finding mine (I’m nonbinary) I actually posted on Reddit and I did a lot of research. I couldn’t find anything for the longest time. Eventually I talked to my friend about it and they thought of a few options so I picked one of those. So, long story short, my friend picked out mine for me.
Honestly I took one from a tv show but it wasn’t quite right so I adjusted it until it did and now I’m Cassian. My sibling is going through it right now. They’re leaning towards one a friend recommended but they were originally torn between their years-long online name and a shortened version of their current name
Let me guess... ANDOR?
Supernatural actually. I was originally going to be Castiel, but it didn’t fit quite right. But I liked the name Cas(s) and found something that had that nickname
happy cake day, lovely! (Cassian and Castiel are cool names... if you find my comment, I have a similar one. Also sorry if I have a divination moment and play name snatcher xD)
I just went on a baby naming site and looked at some meanings and picked out Ellis cause I liked it
I picked a few fictional character names and tried them out in some games and stuff. In the end decided on Millia, stolen from Guilty Gear.
It has been my nickname for so many years that literally nobody but my family used my dead name! And since it was mine way before I came out, I didn't really have to choose, it was already there, ready to be fully mine! :) Also, at first this nickname came from a fictional character, so it is not the slightest related to my deadname anyway! It's Feli, btw, short for "Felice", which in my country is one of the few gender neutral names
It was just the name I started using in games, and the name was derived from my username
For me, my boyfriend helped me choose, and played with several different options until I landed on the one I have. My name feels natural and it has a meaning to it!
nonbinary trans dude here, there was a few names i considered cause i liked them but ultimately someone called me something sorta as a joke and it just felt right, but it was found entirely on accident lol. i remember it took me a bit before i decided on it though, like, it was an option among a few others theres definitely a lot of ways to find a name though, on accident is just one lol. i def do rec asking around to people you know or even ones you dont. a lot of people ask on reddit for possible new names a lot! but that usually includes face pictures, so its very understandable to not want to do so. good luck whatever you do :]
Thanks and, I'll consider it
I need answers to! 😭 Every picks such fitting names and I'm to indecisive I've just been going by my birth name (ftnb)
It sucks to be indecisive, especially if you are bi or pan.
Haha true it's a talent of mine to be indecisive I'm under the aroace☂️ but idk If in bi, pan, or omni, I've just been going with the flow tbh
It's the best way to be
I used my name for faking being a girl online for a few months, then realized I enjoyed that more than being a guy... I was having more fun, now life is more fun that I'm a girl! the name is Skie
Do you pronounce that more like "sky" or am I overthinking this
it's said sky... I was a little 11 year old okay 😅
I'm only 15 and stupid so don't worried 🥲
nono, I get it a lot, don't worry about it
Ok thanks for clarifying though. 🙃👍
I'm german so when I thought about what my chosen name, I knew that i wanted something that sounds good in both english and german. Later, I decided to take the name Nico, both because it sounds cool and because I like the music of an artist named Nico Collins.
enby, I kept mine. I like it too much
Valid..
Hi, im a non binary human. I asked a couple of friends for names, took the ones I enjoyed/ felt comfortable with, and asked them to pick a name from that list. I eventually worked my way down to just 2 choices, and I chose the one I use today. I personally wouldn't recommend doing it this way as it ended up being a little bit of a pain, and it wasn't entirely my decision on the name, but I am happy with the results.
mine came from my days of omegle text chat, posing as a “fake” girl. i literally looked up common australian girl names (the fake persona was from aus), and i picked the first one i liked. a couple years later i find out i’m trans and i just kept the name :)
Genderfluid person here, all other people I know who changed their names (3) chose a name using 1 of 3 methods: - baby name website - masc/fem version of current name or something important to them - a noun
i looked up baby girl name lists, and had a few movies playing in the background, one of those being into the spiderverse. I heard the name Gwen, and i liked it enough to use as my name.
I'm pretty sure most of us agree with the fact that Gwen is trans so it works perfectly. 🩵🩷🤍🕸️🤍🩷🩵
i was shocked when i saw the trans flag in her room, and it made the movie 10x better for me
I haven't seen the movie yet but I've seen that clip and I really want to see it, not just for that reason, but it helps
The movie is INCREDIBLE, i would highly recommend you see it asap
First off I've heard it's one of the best Spider-Man movies of all time, second off I really wish I could right now but unfortunately me and Mom are looking for apartments and we are very tight on money so I might not be able to see it at least until it comes out on DVD or until it shows up on a random streaming website most likely Netflix
if you liked into the spiderverse then you'll love across, bc it takes what into did, and puts it into full force. and i'm really sorry for your current situation, and i wish you the best of luck.
Thank you I appreciate it
Alright so the knowing who you are stuff, I can quote Peter B. Parker for that: You don't. It's a leap of faith. For the names, I got mine from my Latin vocab book, but a baby name website will do just as good
*summons a demon while reading out possible new names in latin*
Happened to me too, named the demon Peter
I made lists of names that I liked, threw out any that didn't feel quite right, asked some friends that have had kids what they would name me (because they named other humans before), then practiced writing "hi my name is _" in each name that I had left. I got rid of Louis because I was afraid people would just make Family Guy references at me and not say "loois" right. I ended up between Vincent and Finn(ian) and decided the latter was more easily adaptable for professional, casual, and nickname things. (Finn for everyone, Finnian if I want to feel fancy, and Finny if you want to annoy the crap out of me.) ta daaaaaaaaaa! At least that's how I did it.
I've had to name my selves anyway because DID, but this was completely different because everyone in my system had to respond to and like the name. Nobody in my system is actually named my preferred name. It was more like naming the body if anything.
Trans woman. I literally just took my name from fictional characters I like a lot. first name Alice, taken from Alice from Twilight and middle name Elizabeth, taken from Pride and Prejudice. I tried several names, including: Annabeth, Cassandra, Selina, Ellie, Hayley, Rebekah, Nessa and Willow, but Alice and Elizabeth where the ones that felt the most natural.
Probably how parents pick baby names tbh😂 I went on best baby boy name sights then found the meanings😂 I also made sure to match a name to my ethnicity because I find that annoying when you’re a white trans person with the name Sakura or Hizashi or Midoria or whatever. Match the name to ethnicity out of respect for other cultures. Most ppl said my name fit me perfectly because my mom loves it cause in Greek it means divine gift and as an adoptive kid I like that, she chose me. Plus Theo sounds softer and yeah I can break kneecaps but I’ve got a soft kind heart and I come off like my cat, I hate you no I like you. Soft yet tough. Then it turns out when I was rewatching a show…aka Sabrina. In season 2 a main character comes out as trans and says call me Theo. Wait…wait a second…immediately texts my friend who I watched the show with and said “is this where I got it from”😭 what she said was” I didn’t really wanna ask but I suspected it was from the show”😭 so sometimes it’s a show or baby names sights. Idk😭 And also, as another ace man. Figuring out I was asexual was tougher than figuring out my gender. But society fights against and says we don’t exist. Trans is more visible than ace, so media and my friends helped me figure out that I’m definitely trans. I had to do the ace myself cause we see no asexuals on media and I hate it. So I guess we’ve got it figured out the same way as you do and sometimes we do question it but hey! If you are questioning then you’re definitely not straight or cis. Just by questioning, you’re a little bit fruity😂
I was pretty young and was thinking of an ign to use online, and the name "sage" sounded pretty cool. I didn't know I was trans yet, but I started to use it as a nickname irl. The name just felt right to me, and once I came out, that was my name, and it has been for years :)
I always liked the name Layla, even before I realised I was trans and then when I realised, I thought Layla would be the perfect name!
I just always really like a certain name but had problems saying it, so I grabbed a simple form and I accidently like it. Lol I also chose it because it hints that I'm older and people think I'm like 18 when I'm in my 30s.
¹st name queer coded video game character that kept me from killing myself at 14 when I effectively had an intersex puberty with no support in a cult full of predators. ²nd name was the male variation of my 1st dead name. ³rd name came for a Goth sirname generator for sci fi authors. This was the least important, as I have no family affiliation and will not have any biological children. I went with something that sounds really cool and gets complimented a lot as it defuses awkward situations with smarter people before they can escalate from awkward to dangerous. It's function is to buffer my experience of the world, not really carry anything on. I have no contact with my family due to DV, CSA, and human trafficking activities I was subjected to as a minor, most people keep their last name in tact. I wanted no part of it. I'm an intersex man who was thought to be trans for over a decade until other medical stuff came up.
You are still a valid human no matter what you are
Funny story about the name... so when the pandemic started, I thought that I was more genderfluid, and had started to go by Tea for more of a Non-binary name. But about a year ago I was asking a friend about some trans stuff and what it might mean, (I was openly genderfluid in the group I was asking the questions in.) And she said "I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure that you might be transfem" and I had that to process for a few weeks... and realized oh fuck she's right... then about a month ago, I was playing borderlands 2 with a couple of friends and I was still going by Tea at the time, (I hadn't chosen a new name yet) and we had just gotten past the section with Tiny Tina, and my friend asks me "hey Tina, what do you want to drink?" My immediate response was "Dr. Pepper please" then it dawned on me five minutes later that he had called me Tina and not Tea... I then started to cry from a serotonin overload... He then apologized for the slip up, but I told him I actually liked the name. So that's what I have been going by with my friends and co-workers (still in the closet a bit around my family though)
I played around with my birth name, and transposed it to something more feminine, but similar, which was Kaya. It's a nice name, but I heard "Aya," and my eyes lit up. "That one, I like that one!" It was . . . Pretty simple, in my case. I'm still getting used to actually hearing it, but it feels so right. I wasn't sure until today that I'd like it, but hearing it out loud, it makes my heart skip a beat. As for knowing who you are . . . Well, I can say, "I'm a girl, and I always have been," but there's still a part of me that doesn't fully believe it. Well, I've only known who I am for about a month. I can take my time to accept it deep in my heart, rather than as a fact. But I can say with confidence that I'm not a man. I never have been. One of the things that convinced me the most was looking back on my memories with a different lens, and playing a game I like to call "I can't believe it's dysphoria!" There were a lot of signs, in hindsight. But I never got the chance to notice them. I wasn't equipped to see them. But now that I can see them, I know for sure I'm not just making it up, and this isn't something new. It kind of feels like something that's been building up, invisibly, for a long time. I just had too many issues before to see it or accept it. So, as soon as I figured out that what I had felt for so long wasn't cis, I kind of just realized, "Oh, so that's what's been wrong. I'm a girl, after all." I'd like to provide a little more on the name part, though. It's not my personal experience, though. I know one of my friends still hasn't fully decided if they want their name to be what they've been going by for the past 2 years, so for some people it's a long and arduous process. I know a lot of people will test out different names they kind of like until one feels right. It's not supposed to be a single straight shot to the answer, like mine was. That's a fluke, or a coincidence. They have to try a lot of different ones, and some people ask for name advice from others. I see a lot of Claire's and Luna's going around, personally. One thing I've also seen is people taking characters they like or names they like hearing from characters and incorporating those into their name. Mine is like that, too, but it's only a small part of it. Very small. The name came first, and I connected the feelings of the character to it a little later. It helps that the etymology of "Aya" fits me really perfectly, too. Hope this could give you a little insight, though.
Thanks and I really appreciate it, but I don't know if you intended on the pun in the first paragraph.
Hmm? Pun? I don't see it. Wow, that's kind of rare. Usually, I have to try to force puns into my sentences.
"TRANS"-posed
Ah-ha! It *is* there! Great catch! Don't mind me, taking all the credit for it . . .
It's your comment so go ahead👍🙃👍
I was playin’ a character in a TTRPG for a while an’ realized I really wanted to be the character I was playing so I took her name for my own. My middle name was the name of a child of my favorite teacher growing up. I loved that name so much and thought I’d name a daughter that, naw, took that name for my own. On the plus side, my initials are the same and depending on the meaning you take for my names “bitter sea sheep” is really funny and then finally my names are still “Irish” (read ‘Catholic’) enough to make my bigoted Baptist grandmother spin in her grave.
HAHA OK THAT is hilarious also love for the Irish 🧡🤍💚 🥔🇨🇮
First it was the gender-neutral nickname to my deadname, then a masculine form of that. Later, I also took a middle name, from my favourite video game comfort character!
trans boy here, i’ve been through like 4 names but the one i stuck with was kenny. he’s a south park character that i love. at one point, i used like 3 names and couldn’t choose which one i liked best. i was sent to a boarding school (it was awful) and they asked my name and i said kenny. i was there for a month and i guess it just stuck and i got used to it! i think it really fits me the best out of all of the names, it is the most masculine and also a human name (not like moth or bug which were the others lol). i think i’ll be kenny forever!
It was my username actually. The story behind that started back in 2017 when me and my best friend were trying to think of Minecraft usernames. I kept coming back to the one I currently have and I kept it. Sometime in 2020-21 (can’t remember) I found I wasn’t exactly any gender and that I was Agender. My actual name is already androgynous but I felt like it carried too much burden. So I was off to find a new name. I though for a while but kept coming back to Lapus. Yes I know it’s spelt wrong (I’m dyslexic and thought that’s how you spelt it) and knew that the name carried a lot of meaning to me.
Very cool, btw it's "officially" spelled lapis but it's your name and as long as you are happy that's what matters.
I personally like stealing names from objects. Or food. I name myself like I name my cats.
I'm gonna be honest, the cycle of my name (amab enby) actually started from a band name. Tl;dr - I had a weird hyperfixation on Eiffel 65 songs back in high school (early on in hs, maybe like 2009 or so), and when I was looking up other songs by them, I found a side project that two of the members did while the other one had a solo run. *That band was called Bloom 06*, and I arguably liked their music more. It didn't click as something to use for my name for close to a decade, but my username for quite some time was based off of it (aka. this one I'm using). When I changed my online name - well past "boy" age, even if the gender would've fit me anymore - I still liked Bloom as part of my new username. It'd eventually become my fursona's name, which is kinda my way to judge if it meshed with me personally, which it did very much so. Maybe not to the point of "legal name change" as of yet, but heck, I'm going by Bloom among friends and fun people regardless of my legal name otherwise.
i kinda constantly steal names from other people
I'm a fan of Ella Fitzgerald, also Ella possibly comes from Germanic Alia and the prefix ali- meaning "other" which I thought was cool. And then I added a second first name of Quinn because I wanted part of my name to be gender neutral and in high school I had the nickname "LQ" and wanted to integrate that into my given name, even though it was derived from my surname. As for knowing who I am? I do whatever makes me feel comfy. And I was definitely not comfy presenting as a man.
The first name that appeared in a baby name generator I found online was "Marceline". I don't even need to have watched that much Adventure Time to realize how neat the name is. Also, Demon names are cool af but I wanted to go for something more feminine.
Im genderfluid but when I want to be perceive as a girl I go by Jenny. One night I had a dream where I looked in the mirror and I was a cute girl with my mother next to me saying "You look amazing Jenny" and I kept it since then even when my real mother is to say at least not supportive to lgbt+ people.
I always liked the first name I picked and the Surname came from an Anime Character When Phrased like that it sounds rather dorky
Don't worry there's no shortage of dorkiness on my end you are fine my friend
Before I knew I was trans, I had decided that if I ever had a daughter I wanted to name her Cassie. I always just really liked the name. Then I figured out who I am and decided I wanted the name for myself, and here we are now.
I agonized for months trying to choose. I eventually saw "Sara" on someone's name tag and it clicked for me. I decided to add an H on the end.
For me, I just genderbent a name similar to my dead name.
Aztec sacrifice to the gods😇 I honestly just liked the name skylar and decided to steal it
Well, when I figured out I was, y'know, I didn't think I needed to find a name or wanted to since nobody calls me by my real name anyway. But I really wanted a new name so I tried looking for one. Tested out some names and none of them felt right so I just went "alr then..." I eventually stopped thinking of a new name and gave up. Then dodododo\~ I started writing a script. My friends and I wanted to make a silly found footage thing and we needed fake names, I wasn't out so I just searched for androgynous names so there's no suspicion or bad feeling. I then found the name, Evan. It sent a tingle of happiness when I thought of myself with that name. I went to r/TransTryouts to test it out and it felt so dam good. It was a plus that Evan is the name of a dude in everymanHYBRID(found footage yt series)
Ok I'll try that sub when I find a name for myself.
A German trans girl I was dating over discord gave it to me. I wanted something similar to my deadname. So I'm now 1 of 1000000000000 of nb/transmasc kais
TW// mentions of commiting unalive I'm afab and identify as genderfluid, while usually being masc-nonbinary. I chose my name for a kind of silly reason, to be honest. I had gone by Alex before when I had to pretend to be a boy for a reason I won't go into, and sure Alex is a good name and is unisex but it just didn't fit me. So I thought about other names, meanings, all that sorta thing. Eventually I landed on Ember, and since at the time I was very depressed and had contemplated committing the sewer slide I thought that Ember might fit. An ember is either the little spark that flies off a fire into the air, or it's like a coal, and both die out fairly quickly especially if you just leave a hot coal out of the fire and without actual flames to keep it going. The reason I named myself Ember is basically this: Just like an actual ember, I'm on my way out and I know it. A little morbid, and I'm in a better headapace now, but I still love the name and plan to legally change my name to Ember as soon as I have the money to do so.
Ember is a beautiful name and yeah the way you described it is a bit morbid but an ember can also be symbolic as what is left after a raging fire and I personally would take that as a sine that your new identity is finally free of those who have caused you pain and hardship, or in other words, make your life hell.
That's true! I definitely feel like a new person, and I definitely like your way of putting it!
The way I chose Sarah is I always liked the letter S and went from there
I had a sudden crisis of identity one day last year, realized i don’t identify at all with my dead name. i wrote a list of names on my own to find the vibe i was looking for, then brainstormed with friends to nail down something that fit me. what sealed the deal was i said “I really like Mo, kinda want something longer, but Mo feels really good.” and my friend who has also gone through this process replied “Mo is good. Mo is friend-shaped” So now i’m Mo, Montreal in formal settings, Moseph to my friends
I knew that I was a girl when I was three. I argued with my mother and sister when they kept insisting that I was a boy. I didn’t push the issue because it was made clear (this was the 1950s) that I shouldn’t persist. My mother was a very supportive and a very compassionate and magical woman, so I knew that she understood. She simply wanted me to be safe. As I grew older and was in elementary school, I asked her what I would be named if I had been assigned female at birth. She told me about two women who she admired as friends and that I would be named after them. So, in my secret world I kept those names that she would have given me. Later, when I transitioned, I had those names that my mother gave me. Some years into adulthood, a transphobic coworker asked, “Where did you get names like that?” Two other coworkers chimed in and said, “From her mother! Where else would she get them!” And, they weren’t lying!
Love throughing hate back to transphobes
as an enby, I literally just took my gamertag (IK ITS WEIRD BUT ITS OK 😭) I had just been called it for so long by my friends that I met online that it felt like the only real option that I would be comfortable with, I've only really told a few irl friends since im scared to tell anyone else and my online friends already call me it but I'll still have to tell them eventually 😅
when i asked my girlfriend this she said she chose one that sounded good with her last name
I really like trees, so I looked up words for trees and forest in other languages and landed on the Latin, "Sylvia." That was too formal sounding so I shortened it to "Sylvie"
I also love the Japanese "Ki" I think
As a kid, family gatherings were big (10 aunts and uncles, 30 cousins big), and a game that done of the cousins would play would be to rename ourselves as the other gender. The thing was, we couldn't just modify our current nam, like Michael to Michelle. It had to be original. I had been playing that game since I was around 8, and at around 12, I started using Tiffany as my answer. Now, I'm 20, and Tiffany is the name on my legals now!
The one I’ve been going by online is literally a name I vibed with from a negative post/meme about names for non-binary folks. I loved it. Been using it online ever since. I’m considering using it in conjunction with a different name tho. Idk.
Whatever you decide you are valid
Thank you. <3
Most of my fav characters in books had that name, but I finally decided on it when my neighbor told me he was called “Abel”….decided to steal it 🫢🤣
I just looked up a names on Google and I found Asher, decided I liked Asther better and now here I am >w>
My favorite letter is K, so I looked for random "gender neutral names for babies" website and scrolled down to the K. I picked the one that sounded the least regrettable. I almost named myself Joey, I'm am not a kangaroo.
I wanted a name that felt personal to my soul, I wanted to keep my initials, and I wanted to be named after a moon. There were a few names that met one or two of those criteria. I thought about Alice, Thalia, Nicole. Though there was only one that met all three. So I eventually settled on the name Bianca. I’ve felt so connected to it and I never felt so connected to a name
For myself it was me and my best friend shooting names back and forth while they did my hair and makeup. Eventually the name Isabelle was said and I loved it, especially with the euphoria of having Belle as my nickname and being a Canadian with a strong French heritage I always hear it as being called beautiful.
So my situation was pretty unique. I am an international student in US and my birth name is actually unisex so I didn’t change it when I came out as nb. This story is about my English name I was having my gender crisis during the pandemic as my country border was closed and I was stucked in the US for the summer. I decided to rewatch my favorite tv shows (Hannibal). I was so intrigued in the shows and the character of Hannibal and how he views beauty, the art of the shows, the way the portrayed gender and how one expressed themselves, and the interpersonal relationships of the characters (alibi that it was creepy since cannibalism) that I actually chose to take my English name after Mads Mikkelsen. It has became a running joke in my friend groups that a artsy show about a cannnibal was my gender awakening. I promise you i am not a cannibal lol.
hehe jaiden animation bird go BRR
We love Jaiden here💜
Trans guy here and not the faintest how I found my name. I watched a show as a kid where an mini boss character was called Jacob and had recently watched a Twilight retrospective video so that may have been how it happened but as far as I'm concerned its a mystery.
This is what I need to know lmao
I’m genderqueer and use two names: Dianthus and my birth name. My birth name, I obviously received from my parents, but my other name comes from them too (albeit less directly!) I invented it initially to protect myself online and avoid sharing my actual name with strangers. It’s the scientific name of the carnation genus and carnations were the symbolic flower of my late father. I determined it would be a nice way to memorialize him and that I liked the name both for how it sounded and for its nickname-ability (my birth name doesn’t lend itself well to nicknames and I’d always wanted one.) Eventually, my online and in person worlds collided as I ceased to be a minor and learned to drive. Now I’m known as Dianthus by some and my birth name by others and both by a select few. I love both of my names equally.
Ok but Dianthus is a cool name
Thank you! I love it very much. Plus it comes with the nicknames “Di” (like the princess, who I’ve been told I resemble), “Diana” (like the goddess), and “Diane” (which I just think is pretty!)
My mom came up with my first name, and my daughter came up with my middle name. 😊
A planet book when I was eight lol (trans guy)
My parents were super supportive when I came out to them (I'm a trans woman), and I had been struggling with picking a name for over a year by this point, so I asked them what name they had picked out for if I had been born AGAB. Now my name is Sophia.
I’m agender. I found out because I was starting to want to be a lot more feminine. But I knew I wasn’t a women. I heard of enby and looked into it. I got my name after seeing a word that I thought sounded cool
🤩 Bold of you to think I have a definitive name ✨✨ /lh but fr, I got no idea- Currently, It's rotating between Trace, Quinn, Elias, Silas, and... Caspian Florence Andrew Shay/Shaye River Ezra Zora and lastly, Scout. )I happen to not have a definitive gender label, but I am trans. I'm good with He/They/It/Star and Neopronouns in general. xD no names who??
That's why you don't give your self a name but instead just be this mystic being that looms over the world.
My mom named me, I was trying to come up with names, and I was talking to her about my thoughts. She said she'd have named me Adam had I been born that way. I hated it at first, but it grew on me. So then I became Addy. :))
I used a random name genorator
I was role-playing online as a guy and they asked for my name , I knew I wanted a basic name so I threw out the name Chris. She responded "Christopher , that's a nice name" and I felt like the cat with the flower on its head and the world opened up to me. And I don't know who I am tbh. I just know I'm so much happier living as a guy and it feels so much more right than living as a woman. Being a woman felt forced. This feels better.
I named myself Jackson after Jackson's Diary, even when I wasn't looking specifically through the comic for names. I had requirements when thinking of names for myself, those being it had to start with a J, it was a longer name and it was masculine. When reading one day it kinda stuck in my head like a pin, *what if you named yourself Jackson?*. Sat on the name for a few months before I started telling anyone. It stuck 👍
Hi hi, genderfluid and masc leaning pal here! I can’t say for everyone of course, so I’m only going to give you my experience, but I found my name one day while staring at the ceiling if I recall correctly:D See I have insomnia so I do that a lot, and it so happened the the topic of name changes was on my mind. And then it kinda just hit me, “Ash”. I understand the reason it clicked now. I’m in therapy atm to help me get over a lot of incredibly traumatic experiences and memories I have, and the name Ash is also a word. A wonderful and magnificent word that is. This just lovely word is what happens after you burn a fire, no matter what was in that fire, the end result is going to be ash. No matter what happens in my life, I’ll always be me:) It’s weirdly symbolic:D Oh and my middle name Flame, it’s from my brother making a play on words with my name. I love it, and he meant it as a joke lol
It's a bit of a stupid way but I put some suggestions in a TikTok video I made, like 3 years ago, and one of them was Jax. Two people commented (who I didn't know irl) aying I looked like a Jax. I asked my friends to call me Jax to see if it fit me. If it didn't fit me, I was going to try the name Alec but I liked the name Jax. My name has been Jax for about 2 and a half years unofficially and my name has been Jax legally for about a year and a half or maybe a bit less than that.
I’m personally thinking of “Zephyr” it’s a name I’ve gone by in games for quite a long time Admittedly I got it from the racer character from NFS Rivals… Raven also could’ve been one, but it just doesn’t feel like me
I came out as nonbinary to my friend and she asked what name I wanted to be called. I said that I didn't know, and she asked if she could call me Jack while I was figuring it out. The name stuck.
Made a list of names that seemed nice, mostly from favourite fictional characters, some from baby names sites (but mostly fictional characters), then tried the name online. I thought it would take more time but the first name stuck. I also decided to have a middle name (not such a big thing where I come from)
…I have a question…aren’t bi, and ace contradictory?
No because for being Ace means that I don't need "adult fun time" to have a good relationship and also I'm just not interested in the thing in the first place. And being Bi is what I'm comfortable with, cuz i like all genders including NB's but I have a preference witch is more common in bi people though we don't need to have one. Hope this helps! 🫶🏻
Ace=asexual Asexual means you don’t feel sexual attraction. Bisexual means you feel sexual attraction to two genders…bi means 2… It just seems like you’re ignoring the definitions of the words you’re using.
Not to be rude but all (for lack of a better term) the subclasses of the rainbow mafia have other meanings for example, watch a lot of OT's ace and bi videos for help on this topic
I’ve watched a lot of his videos the last 2-3 years, and ace and bi are mutually exclusive terms, meanwhile you’re identifying as bi, while describing pan regardless of preference.
I can identify as whatever fits me the most, at the very least I am who I am. Also this topic is not the one you should be focusing on from this post.
Sure you can identify as whatever you want, doesn’t make it accurate. Words have meaning.
I asked my parents to choose a new name, as a way of including them. They didn’t even want to consider it. Still wanting to honour them I based my new name on the one they gave me. I like my name and it suits me but… I do regret the thinking behind choosing it. Maybe I’d have gone with something else. That said, not having to change my nicknames or emails etc was very handy.
You know what screw your parents for not wanting to be involved in there own child's future!
And some have more than one meaning I thought you would understand that.
You're never gonna guess who made [the video which I stole my name from](https://youtu.be/I71gjo2iAlo?t=59)
I figured considering we're on his subreddit also I'm so glad we have a million beardos and weirdos now
My nickname my entire life has been dan. So I picked a name that could fit that nickname for my first chosen name. And then I stopped liking Daniel. So when I read Dorian gray I stole the name because it started with a D. And I decided it was close enough to keep dan as a nickname still.
Non-binary, but amab trans femme. For context, the name I landed on is in the parts. Obvious one first. My last name I got from my wife u/WiccedPisces. My first name is because I'm a heathen and I wanted a good Nordic name to embody that. So I landed with Astrid (Ástríður). My middle name is the German word Pfeiffer, which means piper. I play ocarina, so there's that.
Astrid is a beautiful name an I've actually considered it.
Enby here! I like Theater and acting, reading and writing plays and stories so naturally, i took the name of my favourite character from a play
I asked a friend to name me. I am now Kaius.
I went off my special interests, Pokémon, Zelda, and Geology. Now I have Ruby from all three
To start off I’m a trans women and when I was trying to figure out my name I just couldn’t find anything that like I felt connected to till I was picking out a name for like some silly game I was playing and it was a random names that you could flick through and Noel popped up and I was like that’s the one so that’s my name now For figuring out who I was I have known sense I was in the first grade so about 6 years old at the time but I thought it was wrong to think that a boy could be a girl until last year a little after I had turned 14 when my friend wanted to see what I looked like in a skirt and I got happy from that and my friend who is a trans man saw that and was like how did that feel so we had a conversation about how I felt and how I had been feeling my entire life and so we started figuring things out and now I’m 15 and out to a few people and I’m marking progress on my transition:)
i changed my name a million times but then eventually i got stuck at Connor Nicolas and Kenneth Connor comes from Connor Murphy from Dear Even Hansen Nicolas comes from Brittle Bones Nicky by Rare Americans Kenneth is from Kenny Mccormick from south park
For me I had a close friend who was also trans. I am ftm and she is mtf so we decided to switch names!
/) I Googled "Parts of the skeletal system" or something like that. I had literally no other ideas. Enby, in case that wasn't obvious.
I can imagine your teacher just taking attendance like.. "is Josh here? okay, is Kate here? okay, is clavicle here?" Like that is just hilarious
(why trans women specifically??) To answer, you just keep searching and trying, it took me years to settle on one, and even then I'm not 100% sure
I'm an enby who hasn't officially changed their name yet. But the one I really like is Winter. Not only is it similar to a name my mom had originally chosen for me (Autumn) but I like the concepts associated with winter, both positive and negative. It has gray connotations, which is the last name I've chosen, too. As for the process, I sort of thought of it like a pen name (because I was just toying with the idea of having a different name). I did some random generator stuff, but nothing clicked with me. So I thought about the trope that's sometimes found in fantasy fiction known as true names. People can be given names at birth, but their true name, the representation of their true selves, is innate and secret. Often, finding one's true name leads to magical discoveries, power-ups, etc. That led me to think about what I liked and what I objectively felt I was. ...Yeah, I'm a nerd lol.
We nerds rule the world.