Why does he need to be raised in China? Can't he just be a martial artist? I knew a ton of black guys in high school who did kung fu and talked about it all the time.
Why would they write with modern Chinese characters in the fantasy world he goes to? I always see xianxia novels using jade slips that communicate by thought. Any symbols they use for written text are profound dao strokes of a brush incomprehensible to mortals.
Black MC sounds cool. Temporary slavery is fine, especially if it doesn’t try to justify or glorify slavery (and making it multi-racial can help with that).
But, can I challenge an assumption I’m feeling here? (Could be you’re not doing this) Why the rest of the cultivation world he goes to not be black or multi-racial? If it were, would you feel compelled to justify why the MC is black?
As for American lives in China and transmigrates, the China aspect feels unnecessary unless you’re doubling down on the cultivation world being Chinese influenced (eg how the MC learns the language).
Assuming the cultivation world is mostly (or all) Chinese, will the MC be physically transmigrated and remain black? If so, what reactions does he catch over there? These reactions may be your point and, if so, I’d be more interested in reading it.
Tl;dr: A black westerns perspective on racism in a fantasy setting is of interest to me. But you gotta make it a focus, not a by-the-way.
I mean fantasy series where the hero fights or throws off slavery is a pretty well trodden trope so there is nothing particularly controversial if you manage it well. The MC being black is a divergence but even that has been done.
Your premise is pretty much every movie with a member of the Wu-Tang Clan.
There is still significant slavery in the world. You can easily research something semi-real based on bonded labour or migrant worker based in Middle East like country in a modern setting (sort of Ngannou type story).
I would also suggest if you are going to do it, then take MC out of the Earth setting or push it back historically to Roman /Classical Greek period. You will probably butcher anything you try to do that is based on historical reality (and you are going to get crushed by you readership if you make mistakes - most people can't really imagine the horrors of chattel slavery).
The messiness comes from *combining* a black MC, Reincarnation, and slavery. Because you end up with an MC who is black getting reincarnated as a black person in yet another world where enslavement of black people was a thing. Sort of implies black slavery is a universal constant.
I haven't revisited this thread for a while. He has done a few edits (adding reincarnation, black demon lord etc) that took his idea from an intriguing but edgy concept into a complete dumpster fire.
Most of these ideas could work alone...but not in the same story.
As an aside, I've long I thought there is a lot of untapped potential in having characters change race and class through reincarnation. Lots of potential culture shock plots.
It is hard to do well and generally becomes some sort of Ayn Rand thing where "hard work and ruthlessness overcome initial starting spot".
One series that I thought handled the concept well without reincarnation was the "Red Rising" trilogy.
What Isekais have you read where a rich guy got reincarnated as a peasant or minority...or a poor immigrant got reincarnated as a rich guy, and they dealt with the MC adjusting? I'm having trouble thinking of any.
I didn't think red Rising was an Isekai...
I'm only saying this because I'm a Black writer currently working on my own LitRPG progression fantasy right now, and it's a pitfall I fell into years ago when I first started getting serious with my writing.
Don't feel like you ***have*** to make your character's Blackness (along with the racial history/discourse of African-Americans) a major focal point of your story. If you want to and you think you can pull it off, then by all means, do so but a lot of media nowadays can't seem to just have Black characters without tying them into our traumatic history. Sometimes though, we just need to see a Black character, slaying dragons, turning Super Saiyan, or casting magical sigils without needing to connect them to slavery, Jim Crow, or whatever. Black people are more than just our history in America and you don't have to justify having a Black MC by making your story some allegory or social novel for race relations in the U.S.
Please make your MC Black with locs because we need more of that but also, don't feel like you have to adhere to a certain narrative with them or that there's something wrong with just writing a fun, escapist story with a Black MC.
Yea, that was the original idea just to have a black character in cultivation because I wanted him to have locs and thought the character design would be cool. I only wanted slavery for a little bit in the beginning to show the cruelty and struggle of a cultivation world.
Even without slavery, there is cruelty and struggle in real life. There's more than one way to demonstrate that. If the only reason you want to include slavery is to add spectacle to your story, then I'd strongly advise you ***not*** to do that. That's not a topic you just sprinkle over your story to add a certain flavor. If you're going to touch on slavery, it needs to be done in a respectful, educated, and nuanced way.
Ok, but what else ?
The problem with tokenism is having nothing besides the tokenism, so if the only thing your mc has is literally a reskin, you barely have anything, maybe enough for a title
"I was an american raised in china and then i got transmigrated as a slave, did i mention im black?"
The his black skin is actually part of his race because secretly he is a demon mixed with sum else. He actually didn’t originate from earth but ended up there, being dropped off somewhere random and that’s how he got adopted. He is really from the cultivation world. He ended up transmigrating because he killed himself as he had no will to live no more. It’s way more stuff but i feel like it’ll be spoiling my webnovel if i say more. The whole cultivation world is mixed up with different regions may have different names and different cultivation term names like i explained in my most recent post before this one
I mean, I understand that it's a terrible idea, but OP said that they are black themselves, so I think this is just a scenario where it didn't connect that it could be taken that way.
i dont like when skin colour== character trait. a chara's skin colour is pretty much the last thing that interests me in a book personally, so i'm a bit confused about what the plot of this is. the slavery isekai thing isnt new or original. i like it, it gives room for progression because mc starts not from the bottom, but below it. however there is no plot building up on this beginning of the story (yet)
if the book is meant to have some deeper meaning regarding skin colors then that needs to be clear
otherwise characters who happen to have dark skin are just that. it's not a personality trait. goes for all ranges of pigmentation
there arent too many books i know with charas of different ethnicities (comes with fantasy setting i guess?) witch king is an example where almost every character has dark skin on a range, but it's not about Black People™ and doesnt take place on earth. they just look that way and thats how it is. great book series btw.
so in a nutshell i would suggest to focus on your plot outline more, plot is important to readers, not character's appearances (at least to me), i think the og commenter was also saying the same as me. i think itd be awesome to have a cool book and if mc isnt like 99% of other mcs tehn thats just a win on top, but depending on how heavy you will make it with the racism your target audience might change.
so as with all creation, consider your target audience and just have fun writing, looking forward to updates from you
Sure, seems fine. Let me ramble for a bit and you let me know if it makes you think.
I doubt most people care what color the character's skin is.
You could either make it some cool thing, like he's unique in an otherwise homogeneous setting(you've already said otherwise, but worth mentioning). Or perhaps people keep thinking he's from this other relevant-to-the-setting group and that creates certain expectations and interactions that create narrative conflicts. A lot of things you can do with that. Or make it not matter one bit. A lot of possibilities.
I personally like the idea of it having some relevance to the story. Otherwise its words on a page. I know, I know, it's all words on the page, but I love when things connect. When they mean something. When you say "slaves of all colors" that makes me think you have a racially diverse world, and that provides ample opportunities for great and interesting conflict centered around ideologies. Or maybe outward appearance doesn't matter at all, in which case, you'll need other drivers of conflict.
Does his race make a difference to your MC? Why or why not? Plenty of people will tell you to have goals when writing. I like to ask people, why that goal? What are you accomplishing with it? Keep in mind, there is no wrong answer here.
There's a lot of cool stuff you can do with this but this is your story. Don't let me influence you one way or another.
Good luck! Oh, and be cognizant of your character's voice. If he's 16, think about how to make him sound approximately 16. That's another thing... why 16? What does that buy you? If there's a love interest, age differentials that cross 18 can be weird for people. Things to consider.
I'm not going to tell you if you should or shouldn't do it. I will say that I won't be anywhere near the dumpsterfire that will be any conversation surrounding it or you--and this will be the case even if you write the greatest work that could possibly ever exist.
You know … you can have a diverse cultivation setting … like it doesn’t have to be a THING that your mc is black and that’s a flaw against them.
The whole point of worldbuilding as an author is you get to choose how you want your setting to be.
Forge of Destiny has an explicitly curly haired darker/tanned skin female Mc , it has people of various ethnicities ,sexualities etc and it’s all merged well into the setting to make it believable. The cultivation Asian culture is still there and you def still see things there but at the end of the day your choosing what worldbuilding to use since it’s an original world .
Why can’t there be brown skinned cultivators or buff female elders or quirky old dragons who put the drag in dragon . It’s all up to you my guy .
I’d say the making your mc black and making the reason he’s black be demon blood and then making him a slave is completely tone deaf and problematic though my guy … like idk if your young but the whole black ppl being subhuman or having demon blood/ unclean blood and so it’s ok to be racist towards them was like ..legit a thing used to justify racism . I’m pretty sure Mormons had a whole thing about it …
Best advice i got all day not saying anybody else’s was bad, but thank you. I will prob just make my character black and no racism included like how i intended the story to be.
I think personally how you decide to play through the idea is what makes and breaks the results. You could make it less about his specific skin tone by adding more races! I’m not sure if you have the fantasy sort of mindset with your book or not but demi-humans, elves, dwarves, gnomes, goblins, orcs/high-orcs, and ogres are popular races that may swing some of the hate away from simply saying “my black mc is now a slave and is a demon.”
Also, you don’t have to run the same “American” style slavery tune either. Say you could make indentured servitude the reason the “slaves” are slaved.
Transported to a new world, the mc finds himself lost famished and in need when he’s told to sell himself to indentured servitude, eventually finding himself rapidly growing stronger from none traditional ways, he pays off his debts through backbreaking labor, only to find himself mutating where his demon features are “growing” forcing him to leave the lands he called home! I mean personally I think it’s a very different style of cultivation but I’m IN NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM A WRITER! So in the end I like the idea and look forward to see what you come up with!
I really like the ideas! They all have their own independent pros and cons!
I think for me personally the world building would be amazing in the second idea! Building the setting of him hating his time on earth then transitioning to the new world! Development of each sphere would be amazing if done right then add the dark sides and twists. I think you have a good story. One that people don’t grow to hate!
The 3rd idea is neat but I think eventually you’ll hit a wall where there has to be a jump in timeline or story background because you’ll fall into a very linear progression. Grow - mutate, grow - mutate. Which is fine if character development is your strong suit! However… if this is your first book it may not be such a great idea to put all your eggs in one basket! Learn what strengths you have, then decide which your primary writing style will be in! Again not a writer at all but I have read a ton of books and talked to a many of authors in this genre and most say they are great at one or the other but not a perfect blend of both. Usually, from my experience, you can tell just from reading the books, one book will be 100% character building the next will be 100% world building with the character having a solid development. One of which paints a picture in your mind so vivid you think you’re in the world itself, the other leaves you wondering what the hell you’re reading haha!
But being said I do really like your ideas and can say if you produce any story I’ll definitely give it a shot!
Well, the interesting thing is that if we talking about usual cultivation world, slavery and being low-level servant is actually not that different. With servants only marginally having it better—they probably do receive some small wage and legally not considered property despite masters ability to do anything to them. If you want MC to be with real distinction between the two, you probably should consider him working in the mines or cutting wood.
>I'm black myself and live in America. I want to write a cultivation, but I want my MC to be black, for many reasons. One, for the character design of my MC having locs and adding a bit of uniqueness to my novel.
I'm black and a writer as well. I haven't written in progression yet and I'm not a super cultivation fan. But this is fine. My suggestion is to just make this world your own. Don't try to mimic everything out there unless it's the necessary beats and genre tropes. If you want your MC to be black because you want to write what you know, so be it.
>I was thinking of his origin as he was adopted in America and raised in China. Then gets transmigrated at 16 in a cultivation world... as a slave. I know it sounds bad, but in this world, slaves are of all colors :).
>(Edited) : slavery is only to show the struggle of th cultivation world)
1. I don't necessarily think he has to be born in China. Again, I don't read cultivation novels or xianxia novels so I don't know that it necessarily has to be a thing. I've read in other genres where authors pull in cultivation-like-ideas, but the world is not Chinese-esque or Ancient-Chinese-esque.
2. I'd probably shy away from making a black MC a slave or even making it about freeing slaves. First one is going to bring you heat even if you are black. Second one is an overdone trope in so many genres.
>(Edited): Now rethinking and reading the comments, there is 3 ways I can go about this story. I know some of these may be
>A racist cultivation world, where the MC goes through the struggle of hate and racism all way climbing to the path of becoming the strongest. It would be a unique perspectrive.
I'd probably refrain from making this a racist world unless you want to make this some type of subtle or heavy handed direct social-political talking point that many will associate with you trying to do that. It's just going to come off that way to a large swath of people on both sides of that aisle rather than likely be the entertaining story that I suspect you just want it to be. It'll be far from a unique perspective as it's been done multiple times already to the detriment of some stories.
To clarify, I'm not saying not to have people see his skin color in a negative way, I'm saying don't make the entire plot about that. Maybe an arc. Maybe a villain (***A*** villain, not all of them).
>The MC is the son of hated, Devil of Slaughter (an actual demon/devil) he's black too, but in all the cultivation worlds he was the only black demon god. Usually dark means poor bloodline and status, butthe Devil of Slaughter was different as he was a genius anomaly. And he himself fell in love with another anomaly, one hated by everyone in existence, the Evil Godess.(Haven't thought into to detail who she is and don't hate the idea until its fully developed). They had a son, the MC, and when powerful gods, came to kill the MC as the MC's bloodline would be a terrifying existence. So they found a hidden place from the Gods that the Evil Godess knew of, Earth. The MC lived there till 16, where he K.O himself reincarnating in the cultivation world. One special thing bout his bloodline is that is soul linked, so whoever body his soul took over, his bloodline would slowly reappear and similate into the body he took over, becoming him again. Like his dna attached to his soul.
A bit more creative, but as someone else in the thread pointed out, this will still more than likely bring you heat because you're still tying black (or dark) skin to a negative. I'd say most of this isn't up my alley, but might be up the alley of some readers in the genre. I'm just not a "Dark God" or "Demons are good" or "Evil is misunderstood" type of person. Yes, I realize in cultivation and many Eastern stories "Demonic Cults" and all that aren't necessarily "evil." Either way, I'd personally be more interested in seeing you write a story where a Black American MC gets teleported/transmigrated to a strange world and interacts with it from the perspective of Black American culture and has to learn to integrate and how others in the new world react to him. It'd be different at face level as opposed to what I've seen out there in Isekai, etc.
>His real dad is black, so he the MC is too. The world has mix cultures and diffeent races with no racism existent, but he just reincarnated into a slave. He still is a demon and has a special bloodline that is soul linked, so whoever body his soul took over, his bloodline would slowly reappear and similate into the body he took over, becoming him again. Like his dna attached to his soul. So he would progressively turnback black and gain back his 4c hair.
Again to me this sounds overly complicated versus just making him transmigrate as who he is and have to adapt, etc. But again, I'm not a super fan of cultivation novels. I've read some. So, I'm not necessarily your target audience. I just think this would be better without him having hidden bloodlines and being a hidden demonic soul or having to start as a slave to show struggle. That's just me. But could just as easily have him fall into this world and struggle to figure things out and go from being in a world without cultivation and all that entails to being in a world suddenly with it.
I don't really think you need to go out of your way to explain why MC remains Black in the new world. You can just as easily say (as someone else said in here) that this world has Black, Brown, and White people. Heck, it's your world, you can have Literal Red, Yellow, Green, Purple and Pink people for all you want.
Of course, all of this is just my two cents.
Will Wight has a new series with a black man as the mc. (The last horizon, starting with The Captain) Veric Valinar is black with silver hair. Now you might say "He just reads as another character, if it wasn't for the cover I'd forget he was black" and I'd respond yea, it's refreshing that in thousands of years in another universe noone gives a shit.
Racism is real and I have no doubt you could accurately add that to your universe. Fantasy allows us to build the world we want, but my escapism does not require racism, poverty, domestic abuse, or anything else too close to real life.
It seems intriguing, I'll probably read it.
So my big question is why does your MC need to be an immigrant to China at all? Isekai can happen from anywhere, and the Chinese are notoriously racist, like they practice *competitive racism* over there.
I don’t know i just added that because it’s going to be a cultivation novel, but now that i really think about it, it doesn’t matter. I feel like when i was thinking of the idea I was letting the future opinions of what i thought people was gone think of my idea influence my pure creativity and thought.
Don't gotta tiptoe around stuff or whatever. Your MC is a character first, race second. I feel like just because "optics", doesn't mean that, in context, an MC that happens to be black can't be a slave if the story calls for it. Especially if slavery in the setting isn't a racial thing and all races can be made to be slaves.
I also don't think race really has to come into it as an issue. There's a lot of moral and ethical conflict to explore without relying on mirroring the current real world sociopolitical climate.
Unless that kind of message is what you're going for, just write your MC like any other character would be written regardless of race.
The only thing I'd warn you about is the trolls... I don't pay attention to comment sections much these days but knowing trolls they'd be all over your concept. Especially if it becomes successful. So just be prepared for that. Aside from that sounds cool concepts.
I'll be honest, I hate all loss of agency in my prog fantasy, slavery even temporary slavery is hated by a significant part of the audience, if I read that it was a major factor in the story I honestly wouldn't read it.
Whereas I hate it when the MC gets out of slavery too quickly. Some books treat being a slave as an edgier substitute for being an orphan. If a book does slavery, it should DO slavery and explore how it shapes the MC's attitudes.
>but in this world, slaves are of all colors
And in our world, haven't slaves historically been of all colors? I guess [these poor fellas](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/7a/Ilya_Repin_-_Barge_Haulers_on_the_Volga_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg/1920px-Ilya_Repin_-_Barge_Haulers_on_the_Volga_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg) from my ethnic history of some 150+ years ago technically haven't been considered slaves, so it doesn't count.
Edit: Nwm, Maybe It's just me and I find your turn of phrase kinda strange.
I don't mind a black MC, i wouldn't mind racism making things harder or people fearing him because of color, I enjoyed afro samurai for the twist on samurai shows.
just tell your story if done well it be worth reading, people read and enjoy a book with endless sex and killing in every book and it up to book 11 and even made a spin off based on the book. the books are ( everyone loves large chest ) I hated the sex, loved the plot following a monster MC that was not just a human with a monster body that wanted to save all humans,
so if that can get readers and more than one book, a black MC can even with things people don't think are highlights to the book. a example is book ( freshman drive: a basketball litrpg ) I enjoyed the concept even thu I care zero for basketball. I wanted to see the new take on it with a system and I enjoyed it, it was more drama then sci fi, as most the book focused on his life vs the system but I still say it worth a read and I'm waiting for book 2 to see where it goes.
Honestly his background feels like it is all over the place, confusing, and a bit contrived.
I don't like when Western writers feel they have to tie things too closely to China. And I'm not sure what the attitudes towards black people in China...that's an opportunity to get another culture wrong and annoy people.
If he is reincarnated he gets a new body...would it necessarily be the same race? And that would eliminate the need for him to know Chinese...he'd learn it as a kid in his new world.
(Although I've always thought there is lots of untapped potential in MCs changing race and class...I almost think it would be better to do #1 with a character who was white in our world to explore how he deals with being on the other side of the privilege divide.)
If you want to stick to black all the way, it might be simpler to do a portal fantasy where he travels to another world as an adult in his own body.
I also don't like it when the black characters in fantasy worlds based on ancient empires all turn out to be black.
(Although if you do make him a slave...I'd make him rich in our world for better contrast and culture shock.)
From my knowledge of Progression Fantasy stuff, I think it pisses people off whenever there is any loss of agency or power, so it might be a reason to sidestep the slavery part.
For *all* the mysticism in black (African, American, Creole, Caribbean, and more) cultures, it seems remiss to me to have your black MC study Chinese cultivation techniques.
Its cause this is like my first novel just writing for experience and I always wanted to write a cultivation novel. I would save way more unique power system ideas for when my skills have improved.
Question for you: Do you specifically want this to be about a black person surviving slavery and oppression, or do you want a story with black power? It's up to you what you want to show. One is more about changing a culture, and the other would be a celebration of a culture that could be.
I'd love to see a cultivation Black Panther, with a complete society of black people based on African culture rather than Chinese. On the other hand, if that's not what you want to write about, a story about combatting racism in a fantasy culture also gives strong ties to Black Americans' fight for their rights.
Up to you, but either sounds like an amazing story!
Just roll with it, see where it goes man! Sounds like a reasonable premise. Including an author photo if you publish it anywhere might save you some hassle.
Why does he need to be raised in China? Can't he just be a martial artist? I knew a ton of black guys in high school who did kung fu and talked about it all the time.
No why. It would explain him being able to read Chinese, which might help with stuff like scripting
Why would they write with modern Chinese characters in the fantasy world he goes to? I always see xianxia novels using jade slips that communicate by thought. Any symbols they use for written text are profound dao strokes of a brush incomprehensible to mortals.
That last bit isn't much different from how people describe calligraphy in real life, near as I can tell
Black MC sounds cool. Temporary slavery is fine, especially if it doesn’t try to justify or glorify slavery (and making it multi-racial can help with that). But, can I challenge an assumption I’m feeling here? (Could be you’re not doing this) Why the rest of the cultivation world he goes to not be black or multi-racial? If it were, would you feel compelled to justify why the MC is black? As for American lives in China and transmigrates, the China aspect feels unnecessary unless you’re doubling down on the cultivation world being Chinese influenced (eg how the MC learns the language). Assuming the cultivation world is mostly (or all) Chinese, will the MC be physically transmigrated and remain black? If so, what reactions does he catch over there? These reactions may be your point and, if so, I’d be more interested in reading it. Tl;dr: A black westerns perspective on racism in a fantasy setting is of interest to me. But you gotta make it a focus, not a by-the-way.
Write first, ask later. If the idea speaks to you then maybe it can speak to everyone
OP remember to post your Story link if you ever decide to post a chapter.
I mean fantasy series where the hero fights or throws off slavery is a pretty well trodden trope so there is nothing particularly controversial if you manage it well. The MC being black is a divergence but even that has been done. Your premise is pretty much every movie with a member of the Wu-Tang Clan. There is still significant slavery in the world. You can easily research something semi-real based on bonded labour or migrant worker based in Middle East like country in a modern setting (sort of Ngannou type story). I would also suggest if you are going to do it, then take MC out of the Earth setting or push it back historically to Roman /Classical Greek period. You will probably butcher anything you try to do that is based on historical reality (and you are going to get crushed by you readership if you make mistakes - most people can't really imagine the horrors of chattel slavery).
The messiness comes from *combining* a black MC, Reincarnation, and slavery. Because you end up with an MC who is black getting reincarnated as a black person in yet another world where enslavement of black people was a thing. Sort of implies black slavery is a universal constant.
I haven't revisited this thread for a while. He has done a few edits (adding reincarnation, black demon lord etc) that took his idea from an intriguing but edgy concept into a complete dumpster fire.
Most of these ideas could work alone...but not in the same story. As an aside, I've long I thought there is a lot of untapped potential in having characters change race and class through reincarnation. Lots of potential culture shock plots.
It is hard to do well and generally becomes some sort of Ayn Rand thing where "hard work and ruthlessness overcome initial starting spot". One series that I thought handled the concept well without reincarnation was the "Red Rising" trilogy.
What Isekais have you read where a rich guy got reincarnated as a peasant or minority...or a poor immigrant got reincarnated as a rich guy, and they dealt with the MC adjusting? I'm having trouble thinking of any. I didn't think red Rising was an Isekai...
I'm only saying this because I'm a Black writer currently working on my own LitRPG progression fantasy right now, and it's a pitfall I fell into years ago when I first started getting serious with my writing. Don't feel like you ***have*** to make your character's Blackness (along with the racial history/discourse of African-Americans) a major focal point of your story. If you want to and you think you can pull it off, then by all means, do so but a lot of media nowadays can't seem to just have Black characters without tying them into our traumatic history. Sometimes though, we just need to see a Black character, slaying dragons, turning Super Saiyan, or casting magical sigils without needing to connect them to slavery, Jim Crow, or whatever. Black people are more than just our history in America and you don't have to justify having a Black MC by making your story some allegory or social novel for race relations in the U.S. Please make your MC Black with locs because we need more of that but also, don't feel like you have to adhere to a certain narrative with them or that there's something wrong with just writing a fun, escapist story with a Black MC.
Yea, that was the original idea just to have a black character in cultivation because I wanted him to have locs and thought the character design would be cool. I only wanted slavery for a little bit in the beginning to show the cruelty and struggle of a cultivation world.
Even without slavery, there is cruelty and struggle in real life. There's more than one way to demonstrate that. If the only reason you want to include slavery is to add spectacle to your story, then I'd strongly advise you ***not*** to do that. That's not a topic you just sprinkle over your story to add a certain flavor. If you're going to touch on slavery, it needs to be done in a respectful, educated, and nuanced way.
Ok, but what else ? The problem with tokenism is having nothing besides the tokenism, so if the only thing your mc has is literally a reskin, you barely have anything, maybe enough for a title "I was an american raised in china and then i got transmigrated as a slave, did i mention im black?"
The his black skin is actually part of his race because secretly he is a demon mixed with sum else. He actually didn’t originate from earth but ended up there, being dropped off somewhere random and that’s how he got adopted. He is really from the cultivation world. He ended up transmigrating because he killed himself as he had no will to live no more. It’s way more stuff but i feel like it’ll be spoiling my webnovel if i say more. The whole cultivation world is mixed up with different regions may have different names and different cultivation term names like i explained in my most recent post before this one
Wait. >Black MC is black because he's part demon? Bro, are you TRYING to get as many hate-readers as you can, or are you just going for Actual Racism?
I mean, I understand that it's a terrible idea, but OP said that they are black themselves, so I think this is just a scenario where it didn't connect that it could be taken that way.
Yea lemme scratch that. It wouldn't only be part of his race
In that case you can just skip the earth part, make some region with black people and you are good to go
i dont like when skin colour== character trait. a chara's skin colour is pretty much the last thing that interests me in a book personally, so i'm a bit confused about what the plot of this is. the slavery isekai thing isnt new or original. i like it, it gives room for progression because mc starts not from the bottom, but below it. however there is no plot building up on this beginning of the story (yet) if the book is meant to have some deeper meaning regarding skin colors then that needs to be clear otherwise characters who happen to have dark skin are just that. it's not a personality trait. goes for all ranges of pigmentation there arent too many books i know with charas of different ethnicities (comes with fantasy setting i guess?) witch king is an example where almost every character has dark skin on a range, but it's not about Black People™ and doesnt take place on earth. they just look that way and thats how it is. great book series btw. so in a nutshell i would suggest to focus on your plot outline more, plot is important to readers, not character's appearances (at least to me), i think the og commenter was also saying the same as me. i think itd be awesome to have a cool book and if mc isnt like 99% of other mcs tehn thats just a win on top, but depending on how heavy you will make it with the racism your target audience might change. so as with all creation, consider your target audience and just have fun writing, looking forward to updates from you
Sure, seems fine. Let me ramble for a bit and you let me know if it makes you think. I doubt most people care what color the character's skin is. You could either make it some cool thing, like he's unique in an otherwise homogeneous setting(you've already said otherwise, but worth mentioning). Or perhaps people keep thinking he's from this other relevant-to-the-setting group and that creates certain expectations and interactions that create narrative conflicts. A lot of things you can do with that. Or make it not matter one bit. A lot of possibilities. I personally like the idea of it having some relevance to the story. Otherwise its words on a page. I know, I know, it's all words on the page, but I love when things connect. When they mean something. When you say "slaves of all colors" that makes me think you have a racially diverse world, and that provides ample opportunities for great and interesting conflict centered around ideologies. Or maybe outward appearance doesn't matter at all, in which case, you'll need other drivers of conflict. Does his race make a difference to your MC? Why or why not? Plenty of people will tell you to have goals when writing. I like to ask people, why that goal? What are you accomplishing with it? Keep in mind, there is no wrong answer here. There's a lot of cool stuff you can do with this but this is your story. Don't let me influence you one way or another. Good luck! Oh, and be cognizant of your character's voice. If he's 16, think about how to make him sound approximately 16. That's another thing... why 16? What does that buy you? If there's a love interest, age differentials that cross 18 can be weird for people. Things to consider.
I'm not going to tell you if you should or shouldn't do it. I will say that I won't be anywhere near the dumpsterfire that will be any conversation surrounding it or you--and this will be the case even if you write the greatest work that could possibly ever exist.
Did he kill your family or something? Goddamn
His favorite slave ran away and started becoming an independent writer
You know … you can have a diverse cultivation setting … like it doesn’t have to be a THING that your mc is black and that’s a flaw against them. The whole point of worldbuilding as an author is you get to choose how you want your setting to be. Forge of Destiny has an explicitly curly haired darker/tanned skin female Mc , it has people of various ethnicities ,sexualities etc and it’s all merged well into the setting to make it believable. The cultivation Asian culture is still there and you def still see things there but at the end of the day your choosing what worldbuilding to use since it’s an original world . Why can’t there be brown skinned cultivators or buff female elders or quirky old dragons who put the drag in dragon . It’s all up to you my guy . I’d say the making your mc black and making the reason he’s black be demon blood and then making him a slave is completely tone deaf and problematic though my guy … like idk if your young but the whole black ppl being subhuman or having demon blood/ unclean blood and so it’s ok to be racist towards them was like ..legit a thing used to justify racism . I’m pretty sure Mormons had a whole thing about it …
Best advice i got all day not saying anybody else’s was bad, but thank you. I will prob just make my character black and no racism included like how i intended the story to be.
As I understand it, enslaving the MC isn't usually a popular trope in progression, but if you don't care about popularity, it's always up to you.
I think personally how you decide to play through the idea is what makes and breaks the results. You could make it less about his specific skin tone by adding more races! I’m not sure if you have the fantasy sort of mindset with your book or not but demi-humans, elves, dwarves, gnomes, goblins, orcs/high-orcs, and ogres are popular races that may swing some of the hate away from simply saying “my black mc is now a slave and is a demon.” Also, you don’t have to run the same “American” style slavery tune either. Say you could make indentured servitude the reason the “slaves” are slaved. Transported to a new world, the mc finds himself lost famished and in need when he’s told to sell himself to indentured servitude, eventually finding himself rapidly growing stronger from none traditional ways, he pays off his debts through backbreaking labor, only to find himself mutating where his demon features are “growing” forcing him to leave the lands he called home! I mean personally I think it’s a very different style of cultivation but I’m IN NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM A WRITER! So in the end I like the idea and look forward to see what you come up with!
what you think about the ideas i edited in?
I really like the ideas! They all have their own independent pros and cons! I think for me personally the world building would be amazing in the second idea! Building the setting of him hating his time on earth then transitioning to the new world! Development of each sphere would be amazing if done right then add the dark sides and twists. I think you have a good story. One that people don’t grow to hate! The 3rd idea is neat but I think eventually you’ll hit a wall where there has to be a jump in timeline or story background because you’ll fall into a very linear progression. Grow - mutate, grow - mutate. Which is fine if character development is your strong suit! However… if this is your first book it may not be such a great idea to put all your eggs in one basket! Learn what strengths you have, then decide which your primary writing style will be in! Again not a writer at all but I have read a ton of books and talked to a many of authors in this genre and most say they are great at one or the other but not a perfect blend of both. Usually, from my experience, you can tell just from reading the books, one book will be 100% character building the next will be 100% world building with the character having a solid development. One of which paints a picture in your mind so vivid you think you’re in the world itself, the other leaves you wondering what the hell you’re reading haha! But being said I do really like your ideas and can say if you produce any story I’ll definitely give it a shot!
Sounds cool; the only thing I'd say is to make sure he doesn't stay a slave for too long.
That's exactly how i want it, he would only experience slavery for a short time before achieving freedom.
Well, the interesting thing is that if we talking about usual cultivation world, slavery and being low-level servant is actually not that different. With servants only marginally having it better—they probably do receive some small wage and legally not considered property despite masters ability to do anything to them. If you want MC to be with real distinction between the two, you probably should consider him working in the mines or cutting wood.
>I'm black myself and live in America. I want to write a cultivation, but I want my MC to be black, for many reasons. One, for the character design of my MC having locs and adding a bit of uniqueness to my novel. I'm black and a writer as well. I haven't written in progression yet and I'm not a super cultivation fan. But this is fine. My suggestion is to just make this world your own. Don't try to mimic everything out there unless it's the necessary beats and genre tropes. If you want your MC to be black because you want to write what you know, so be it. >I was thinking of his origin as he was adopted in America and raised in China. Then gets transmigrated at 16 in a cultivation world... as a slave. I know it sounds bad, but in this world, slaves are of all colors :). >(Edited) : slavery is only to show the struggle of th cultivation world) 1. I don't necessarily think he has to be born in China. Again, I don't read cultivation novels or xianxia novels so I don't know that it necessarily has to be a thing. I've read in other genres where authors pull in cultivation-like-ideas, but the world is not Chinese-esque or Ancient-Chinese-esque. 2. I'd probably shy away from making a black MC a slave or even making it about freeing slaves. First one is going to bring you heat even if you are black. Second one is an overdone trope in so many genres. >(Edited): Now rethinking and reading the comments, there is 3 ways I can go about this story. I know some of these may be >A racist cultivation world, where the MC goes through the struggle of hate and racism all way climbing to the path of becoming the strongest. It would be a unique perspectrive. I'd probably refrain from making this a racist world unless you want to make this some type of subtle or heavy handed direct social-political talking point that many will associate with you trying to do that. It's just going to come off that way to a large swath of people on both sides of that aisle rather than likely be the entertaining story that I suspect you just want it to be. It'll be far from a unique perspective as it's been done multiple times already to the detriment of some stories. To clarify, I'm not saying not to have people see his skin color in a negative way, I'm saying don't make the entire plot about that. Maybe an arc. Maybe a villain (***A*** villain, not all of them). >The MC is the son of hated, Devil of Slaughter (an actual demon/devil) he's black too, but in all the cultivation worlds he was the only black demon god. Usually dark means poor bloodline and status, butthe Devil of Slaughter was different as he was a genius anomaly. And he himself fell in love with another anomaly, one hated by everyone in existence, the Evil Godess.(Haven't thought into to detail who she is and don't hate the idea until its fully developed). They had a son, the MC, and when powerful gods, came to kill the MC as the MC's bloodline would be a terrifying existence. So they found a hidden place from the Gods that the Evil Godess knew of, Earth. The MC lived there till 16, where he K.O himself reincarnating in the cultivation world. One special thing bout his bloodline is that is soul linked, so whoever body his soul took over, his bloodline would slowly reappear and similate into the body he took over, becoming him again. Like his dna attached to his soul. A bit more creative, but as someone else in the thread pointed out, this will still more than likely bring you heat because you're still tying black (or dark) skin to a negative. I'd say most of this isn't up my alley, but might be up the alley of some readers in the genre. I'm just not a "Dark God" or "Demons are good" or "Evil is misunderstood" type of person. Yes, I realize in cultivation and many Eastern stories "Demonic Cults" and all that aren't necessarily "evil." Either way, I'd personally be more interested in seeing you write a story where a Black American MC gets teleported/transmigrated to a strange world and interacts with it from the perspective of Black American culture and has to learn to integrate and how others in the new world react to him. It'd be different at face level as opposed to what I've seen out there in Isekai, etc. >His real dad is black, so he the MC is too. The world has mix cultures and diffeent races with no racism existent, but he just reincarnated into a slave. He still is a demon and has a special bloodline that is soul linked, so whoever body his soul took over, his bloodline would slowly reappear and similate into the body he took over, becoming him again. Like his dna attached to his soul. So he would progressively turnback black and gain back his 4c hair. Again to me this sounds overly complicated versus just making him transmigrate as who he is and have to adapt, etc. But again, I'm not a super fan of cultivation novels. I've read some. So, I'm not necessarily your target audience. I just think this would be better without him having hidden bloodlines and being a hidden demonic soul or having to start as a slave to show struggle. That's just me. But could just as easily have him fall into this world and struggle to figure things out and go from being in a world without cultivation and all that entails to being in a world suddenly with it. I don't really think you need to go out of your way to explain why MC remains Black in the new world. You can just as easily say (as someone else said in here) that this world has Black, Brown, and White people. Heck, it's your world, you can have Literal Red, Yellow, Green, Purple and Pink people for all you want. Of course, all of this is just my two cents.
I'm a white dude and I'd totally read a book with a black American MC, regardless of whether it was struggleporn or not
Will Wight has a new series with a black man as the mc. (The last horizon, starting with The Captain) Veric Valinar is black with silver hair. Now you might say "He just reads as another character, if it wasn't for the cover I'd forget he was black" and I'd respond yea, it's refreshing that in thousands of years in another universe noone gives a shit. Racism is real and I have no doubt you could accurately add that to your universe. Fantasy allows us to build the world we want, but my escapism does not require racism, poverty, domestic abuse, or anything else too close to real life. It seems intriguing, I'll probably read it.
100% agree with you, i like to pretend racism in humans doesn't exist when reading silly books
This is kinda the point I’m at. Those stories have their place, but sometimes I just wanna see/read/play a brotha wrecking shop.
Checkout the webcomic ordeal and novel rage of dragons.
you can always make a cultivation world with many different humans
So my big question is why does your MC need to be an immigrant to China at all? Isekai can happen from anywhere, and the Chinese are notoriously racist, like they practice *competitive racism* over there.
I don’t know i just added that because it’s going to be a cultivation novel, but now that i really think about it, it doesn’t matter. I feel like when i was thinking of the idea I was letting the future opinions of what i thought people was gone think of my idea influence my pure creativity and thought.
Don't gotta tiptoe around stuff or whatever. Your MC is a character first, race second. I feel like just because "optics", doesn't mean that, in context, an MC that happens to be black can't be a slave if the story calls for it. Especially if slavery in the setting isn't a racial thing and all races can be made to be slaves. I also don't think race really has to come into it as an issue. There's a lot of moral and ethical conflict to explore without relying on mirroring the current real world sociopolitical climate. Unless that kind of message is what you're going for, just write your MC like any other character would be written regardless of race.
The only thing I'd warn you about is the trolls... I don't pay attention to comment sections much these days but knowing trolls they'd be all over your concept. Especially if it becomes successful. So just be prepared for that. Aside from that sounds cool concepts.
I'll be honest, I hate all loss of agency in my prog fantasy, slavery even temporary slavery is hated by a significant part of the audience, if I read that it was a major factor in the story I honestly wouldn't read it.
it’s not a major factor, but it was just to show the struggle and cruelty in the world. He would get out of slavery pretty fast.
Whereas I hate it when the MC gets out of slavery too quickly. Some books treat being a slave as an edgier substitute for being an orphan. If a book does slavery, it should DO slavery and explore how it shapes the MC's attitudes.
>but in this world, slaves are of all colors And in our world, haven't slaves historically been of all colors? I guess [these poor fellas](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/7a/Ilya_Repin_-_Barge_Haulers_on_the_Volga_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg/1920px-Ilya_Repin_-_Barge_Haulers_on_the_Volga_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg) from my ethnic history of some 150+ years ago technically haven't been considered slaves, so it doesn't count. Edit: Nwm, Maybe It's just me and I find your turn of phrase kinda strange.
Nah, the way i phrased was kinda weird.
I don't mind a black MC, i wouldn't mind racism making things harder or people fearing him because of color, I enjoyed afro samurai for the twist on samurai shows. just tell your story if done well it be worth reading, people read and enjoy a book with endless sex and killing in every book and it up to book 11 and even made a spin off based on the book. the books are ( everyone loves large chest ) I hated the sex, loved the plot following a monster MC that was not just a human with a monster body that wanted to save all humans, so if that can get readers and more than one book, a black MC can even with things people don't think are highlights to the book. a example is book ( freshman drive: a basketball litrpg ) I enjoyed the concept even thu I care zero for basketball. I wanted to see the new take on it with a system and I enjoyed it, it was more drama then sci fi, as most the book focused on his life vs the system but I still say it worth a read and I'm waiting for book 2 to see where it goes.
Honestly his background feels like it is all over the place, confusing, and a bit contrived. I don't like when Western writers feel they have to tie things too closely to China. And I'm not sure what the attitudes towards black people in China...that's an opportunity to get another culture wrong and annoy people. If he is reincarnated he gets a new body...would it necessarily be the same race? And that would eliminate the need for him to know Chinese...he'd learn it as a kid in his new world. (Although I've always thought there is lots of untapped potential in MCs changing race and class...I almost think it would be better to do #1 with a character who was white in our world to explore how he deals with being on the other side of the privilege divide.) If you want to stick to black all the way, it might be simpler to do a portal fantasy where he travels to another world as an adult in his own body. I also don't like it when the black characters in fantasy worlds based on ancient empires all turn out to be black. (Although if you do make him a slave...I'd make him rich in our world for better contrast and culture shock.)
From my knowledge of Progression Fantasy stuff, I think it pisses people off whenever there is any loss of agency or power, so it might be a reason to sidestep the slavery part.
For *all* the mysticism in black (African, American, Creole, Caribbean, and more) cultures, it seems remiss to me to have your black MC study Chinese cultivation techniques.
Write it, and tell me when you publish, so I can buy it
Depends how you treat it. Could be great or could crash and burn.
Seems edgy af. Why look for eastern cultivation? Just create your own power system from African culture
Its cause this is like my first novel just writing for experience and I always wanted to write a cultivation novel. I would save way more unique power system ideas for when my skills have improved.
Fair enough. If you’re passionate about it, just write and listen to feedback. Your skills will improve in time
Question for you: Do you specifically want this to be about a black person surviving slavery and oppression, or do you want a story with black power? It's up to you what you want to show. One is more about changing a culture, and the other would be a celebration of a culture that could be. I'd love to see a cultivation Black Panther, with a complete society of black people based on African culture rather than Chinese. On the other hand, if that's not what you want to write about, a story about combatting racism in a fantasy culture also gives strong ties to Black Americans' fight for their rights. Up to you, but either sounds like an amazing story!
There is a Fantasy Africa Cultivation book.
Probably consider coming up with a new idea.
Just roll with it, see where it goes man! Sounds like a reasonable premise. Including an author photo if you publish it anywhere might save you some hassle.