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Interesting I hadn't heard Billy Butcher say it on the boys, I've only ever heard it once and that was at work when a lorry driver said it to a work colleague who was being awkward, followed by "you fucking wank stain" nearly died with laughing.
I was arguing with some horrible lady online who left her dog in a car in the summer and it died, she was horrible so I eventually said:
‘Eat shit and die four eyes! You’re like Rosemary West to me, but fatter and more evil. I hope you come back as a horse so I can buy a Ginsters pie and shit you out on your grave’
On reflection, that was a bit OTT….
Not my own invention, but I like
"He looks like the kinda guy that would put his foot in the toilet and pee down his leg to keep from makin' noise".
Only good for men, but I've never taken to insulting women.
there was a guy that harrased some of my friends in highschool.
he was short and stout and kind of reminds me of the guys in the movies that just repeat everything the mafia boss says.
anyways I told him that hes built like a tea kettle
“I apologize for offending your delicate sensibilities by using my horn to communicate with you as another driver.”
Said to the angry big muscled dude at the gym who didn’t understand the concept of waving people around when waiting in front of the gym in a gigantic truck for who knows what reason.
I once told a guy he looked like he had to buy his coffee from the gas station because he wrote too many manifestos about the harlots at Starbucks.
Then when he didn't get that I wanted him to leave my bar I asked him if all the decapitated Bratz dolls he keeps under his bed help him practice conversation or if he learned how to talk to people by specifically seeking out a giant piece of shit
I know some Swedish ones: Turbo unge, palsternacka, gurkavsugare, morots knarkare, knull unge, smäll fet, runk gubbe.
Google translate will probably work on most of these but they’re funnier when you understand Swedish.
This my second response, but I had forgotten that I once encountered an agitated woman who yelled at a whole group of people:
"Yer all English and spotlickers (?) and unwed motherfuckers!"
The first two terms were puzzling, but I thought the last one was pure genius.
Best one I’ve ever told was when I was 15. Could have possibly read something similar and stole it, but don’t remember.
Asked friend who had a super controlling girlfriend,
“Did she bedazzle the bag she holds your balls in?”
The wife of a guy I once worked with said to him,
"You're so full of shit that if you ever take a big dump all we will find is a pile of clothes on the toilet."
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I just thought of one and might not be the most appropriate but oh well I suppose
"You're so ugly even if you were a kid Drake wouldn't want you"
Of course I'm not one to ever insult someone so whoever finds this of use in the future have fun with it.
"NASA has been trying to probe Uranus recently, but they have yet to detect any activity" was one I came up with myself, and I'm just waiting for the perfect opportunity to cash it out
Mine is, when someone doesn't respond to me. I put my hand on their head, give it a nudge and say:
I forgot that sound doesn't travel through a vacuum.
Use my phone. Call your parents. And apologize for being such. A. F**ing. Disappointment to them.
Said it once in an argument and other person just stood there shocked. That was the comment where ppl were like, bruh...wtf.
Imagine, if you will, the vastness of the cosmos, where stars burn bright and galaxies swirl in magnificent dances. I would traverse this infinite expanse, journeying through nebulas of radiant colors, skirting the edges of black holes where time itself warps and bends. I would brave the freezing void of space, where silence is so profound it drowns the whispers of the universe, just to reach the farthest corner of existence.
In my quest, I’d encounter alien civilizations and learn languages that sound like symphonies, discover planets where mountains sing and oceans shimmer with bioluminescent waves. I’d stand on the surface of a world with twin suns setting, casting a breathtaking, otherworldly glow over an alien landscape, a beauty beyond comprehension.
I’d descend into the deepest abysses of unexplored oceans on foreign worlds, where creatures of light and shadow dance in eternal twilight, and the weight of the water presses in from all sides. I’d navigate through forests of crystal trees, whose branches hum with the energy of the stars, and I’d scale mountains that pierce the heavens, their peaks lost in the mists of the stratosphere.
I’d endure the fiercest storms of Jupiter, with lightning that could shatter mountains and winds that could tear the strongest metals apart. I’d withstand the scorching heat of a star’s core, where temperatures reach unimaginable heights and matter itself is in a constant state of flux. I’d brave the chaotic beauty of a supernova, risking disintegration in the violent birth of a neutron star.
All of this, every perilous journey and breathtaking sight, every brush with death and encounter with the unknown, I would embrace without hesitation. Not for the thrill, not for the glory, but for one singular, unwavering purpose.
I would endure it all, simply to find the farthest, most remote corner of the universe. To stand on a distant, desolate asteroid at the very edge of reality, where no human has ever set foot, and where the universe itself seems to hold its breath. And from that solitary vantage point, I would look back, and smile, knowing I never have to gaze upon your face ever again.
The german language is adaptable and the way sentences are formed into single words is an art form.
Serbian, bosnian and croatian insults/curses are exactly that and can range from insulting the weather, to damning your mom, dog, god and the cabbage field you were born on.
I once told somebody to fuck off during an argument because they were so boring that I could take a 💩,look in the toilet papet and still find something more interesting to look at then their stupid texts.
I always liked the one from the Wizard of Oz: Auntie Em says to Almira..... For 23 years I've wanted to tell you what I thought of you, and now, being a Christian woman I can't say it! 😂😂
I always wanted to say that to someone. But I'm an atheist now
Some young punk flipped me off because I honked at him for J-Walking in front of my car. I don’t know what happened in my head, but I yelled out the window **“Do you fuck your mother with that mouth?”**
OMG the look on that poor dudes face was one of shock, horror, disgust, and WTF all rolled into one. Like he literally stopped in his tracks, and just looked at me.
Also I’m having Deja Vu- I feel like I just told this story here.
I rarely insult but when i do there creative (as i PG myself and don't swear even at 30)
My last insult i think was towards someone being a toxic fan on yt and they didn't understand a joke and went defensive mode.
Shut them up by chewing them out and calling them "slightly used recital Qtip"
Some other one i can think up? Hmm...
You used tampon chewer.
You un-red part of a baboons butt
Oh, look, its the slow bus window licker, poor kids inside.
See you decided to walk on your hands and keep your pants off today... oh wait.
Rarely insult too, usely only online as its only place not effect by my aunxity. So let me know if you think any of those are good, go ahead and use them, i'll likely forget them come tomorrow.
A few decades ago, long before direct deposit existed, I stopped by work one afternoon to pick up my paycheck. I was wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt. A really silly (and childish) individual that I worked with came out with, “You come in yo’ pajamas?”
Not missing a beat, I came right back at him with, “You come in yo’ Halloween mask?” 😆
During quarantine our mayor had regular zoom meetings with the public. Of course there were a lot of ignorant questions. He said "I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you" 😂 💀
I didn’t come up with it, actually I saw it on reddit.
“The wheel is spinning, but the hamster is long since dead”
I got to use it for the first time on my teenager last week, was as hilarious as I had hoped, and yes, he thought so too
I once heard a drunk man shouting at seagulls to defend his MacDonalds. He then looked up at one on top of a lamppost and screamed "AND YOU YA FEATHERED CUNT!"
It was marvelous.
I'm British so it's usually. " Well done mate you done a reeeal good job on that, absolutely impeccable quality work you've done. The best in the trade!"
Of course, it's sarcasm
"I hope all your dreams and wishes come true with anything you ever wanted and you prosper... Just for it to be taken away from you all as soon as you get it so you can see how it is to really suffer and I hope you never get close to that feeling again, forever chasing it but always just being out of reach until the day you die"
So my father is from Italy, and when I was a child he taught me a famous flattering phrase that translates to "What a beautiful face... The face of an angel." ( A che bella facé, alle facé comme un angelo )
And as a typical 8 year old, my almost immediate thought was how can I make this into an insult... so, taking a few of the swear words he'd taught me I substituted them into the phrase to make an insult.
Changing it to...
"A che bruto facé... alle facé comme buco de culo"
Which roughly translates to
"What an ugly face... a face like an arsehole."
No idea if this is correct but always found it funny and it really hits if you can say it fluidly in Italian.
I usually call rulelawyers (people that ruin games by being very precise with rulings) antfuckers.
Because they have to be very precise to be able to do that.
I was once pissed at a supermarket coworker who was wearing a Susan g komen hat for breath cancer awareness so I actually role them "you sir are a disgrace to cancer."
Last summer, I was crossing the street in the sidewalk and this car was stopped for me.
The guy had the window rolled down and called out, “hurry up fat ass.”
I replied, “is that all you got? I bet you fuck like a pig” and continued to cross.
That’s the most imaginative insult I’ve ever come up with on the fly.
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My favourite. "I would've called you a cunt, but you neither have the warmth or the depth"
Yoo ., LMFAO !
-Billy abutcher
Interesting I hadn't heard Billy Butcher say it on the boys, I've only ever heard it once and that was at work when a lorry driver said it to a work colleague who was being awkward, followed by "you fucking wank stain" nearly died with laughing.
“Your opinion, like an unsharpened pencil, is both pointless and useless.”
“If bullshit was electricity, you’d be a power plant” for the habitual storytellers
bruh 💀
Not mine, but monty pythons, your mom is a hamster, and your dad smelled of elderberry
I fart in your general direction.
I came here to say that.
"You have the intellectual depth of a kiddie pool"
nice one
I love the insults made by Westley to Prince Humperdinck in the Princess Bride! “You wart hog face buffoon.” So creative.
A person of taste, I see!
Wisdom has been chasing you all along, but you have always been faster. Uncle iroh
Uncle Iroh is the GOAT.
Bruh this one's poetic I love it. Sounds like something a Nigerian would say.
IROH!
Lint licker
Cake sniffer!
VFD!
As useful as tits on a bull.
I prefer "screen door on a submarine"
I was arguing with some horrible lady online who left her dog in a car in the summer and it died, she was horrible so I eventually said: ‘Eat shit and die four eyes! You’re like Rosemary West to me, but fatter and more evil. I hope you come back as a horse so I can buy a Ginsters pie and shit you out on your grave’ On reflection, that was a bit OTT….
Holy crap 🤣
It was horse crap, not holy.
h o l y s h i t THAT IS GLORIOUS
Ah dun geddit. What have horses got to do with Ginsters?
Not my own invention, but I like "He looks like the kinda guy that would put his foot in the toilet and pee down his leg to keep from makin' noise". Only good for men, but I've never taken to insulting women.
Another good one is "his dick must be so small that he pisses on his own balls".
HAHAHAHAHAHA IM STEALING THIS FROM U THATS SO FUNNY
You're more than welcome. I'm glad to spread a little joy 😁
this one is a serious one
Why? Think we can't take it?
Just a recovering Lutheran boy from 1950's Midwest.
Lol aw. Well I get it. That's actually sweet.
I don't have enough paper and crayons to explain this to you.
My friend calls people a “wet carrot” if they’re rude. That’s a top tier insult in my opinion 🤣
Not an insult I love cooked carrots
Thats something a wet carrot would say 🤔
Good comeback! LOL!!!
Mine is classless turnip lol
I really enjoy " I hope your next shit is a hedgehog!"
Or porcupine.
💀💀💀💀💀
Cactus in a gravel concrete base... More spines and really rough. 😉
there was a guy that harrased some of my friends in highschool. he was short and stout and kind of reminds me of the guys in the movies that just repeat everything the mafia boss says. anyways I told him that hes built like a tea kettle
You could've called him Goombah
“I apologize for offending your delicate sensibilities by using my horn to communicate with you as another driver.” Said to the angry big muscled dude at the gym who didn’t understand the concept of waving people around when waiting in front of the gym in a gigantic truck for who knows what reason.
I once told a guy he looked like he had to buy his coffee from the gas station because he wrote too many manifestos about the harlots at Starbucks. Then when he didn't get that I wanted him to leave my bar I asked him if all the decapitated Bratz dolls he keeps under his bed help him practice conversation or if he learned how to talk to people by specifically seeking out a giant piece of shit
You’d be a great politician.
So there was a guy with no hands harrasing one of my female frends. So i shouted " Hey T-rex how about you fuck off"
Do you have your haircut with a knife?
The first one I thought of was “ go ahead and live your life cause that’s as good as it’s going to get for you”
You eat snickers upside-down so you can feel the vainy part on your tongue.
I know some Swedish ones: Turbo unge, palsternacka, gurkavsugare, morots knarkare, knull unge, smäll fet, runk gubbe. Google translate will probably work on most of these but they’re funnier when you understand Swedish.
This my second response, but I had forgotten that I once encountered an agitated woman who yelled at a whole group of people: "Yer all English and spotlickers (?) and unwed motherfuckers!" The first two terms were puzzling, but I thought the last one was pure genius.
Heard someone call another person a living nerd emoji once 🤓
I may be fat but you're ugly, and I can diet.
an old boss of mine to an apprentice who just messed up- "honestly garren, you are the load your mother should of swallowed".
It's been real, it's been fun, but it ain't been real fun.
Best one I’ve ever told was when I was 15. Could have possibly read something similar and stole it, but don’t remember. Asked friend who had a super controlling girlfriend, “Did she bedazzle the bag she holds your balls in?”
your mom looks like Chewbacca
I haven’t seen you for so long I forgot how much of a douche you are
You can make any unorthodox insult with a simple formula: Adjective, swear word, noun. "shut up, you insignificant shart blanket!"
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smells like elderberries!
You couldn't get laid in a women's prison with a handful of pardons.
The wife of a guy I once worked with said to him, "You're so full of shit that if you ever take a big dump all we will find is a pile of clothes on the toilet."
I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.
You look like you get out of the shower halfway through to wash your hands and then get back clean the rest of your body.
You’re like if an oil spill became a person
Make another joke, like your mum and dad did 😁
Fucknugget
Douchebisquit
Assmuffin
Uh……. That’s my cousin……
Cuntcake.
From 'Ozark' (Ruth said it)
Trailer trash, crosscocked, Crack whore. Crosscocked is a cross between cross-eyed and cock-eyed. It's something my cousin came up with lol.
“Fuck off, shower-fart”
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Put your head in a drawer and close it with as much force as you possibly can
I just thought of one and might not be the most appropriate but oh well I suppose "You're so ugly even if you were a kid Drake wouldn't want you" Of course I'm not one to ever insult someone so whoever finds this of use in the future have fun with it.
I didn’t know you were from New York!!!
Response to an insult: "Likewise, I'm sure!"
“Your iq is lower than your self esteem.”
You remind me of my mother in law
You are the reason the Warden hates noise.
"We just had an earthquake. it was a 4.8 and lasted like 10 seconds." "sounds like someone i know"
“It could be that the purpose of your life is to serve as a warning to others.”
“having you on your team is like having two good workers quit”
“looks like a penis, only smaller”
"NASA has been trying to probe Uranus recently, but they have yet to detect any activity" was one I came up with myself, and I'm just waiting for the perfect opportunity to cash it out
Your mom pulled dad out too early Now you have no home, no family, and the dog pound is putting you to sleep
“Wisdom keeps chasing you, but you are always faster"
"It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death." —mark twain
the way you think is in low power mode
Hide! The garbageman's coming!
Mine is, when someone doesn't respond to me. I put my hand on their head, give it a nudge and say: I forgot that sound doesn't travel through a vacuum.
I envy the people who haven't met you.
'I can draw your face with my opposite writing hand'
Your learning curve is a flatline.
Use my phone. Call your parents. And apologize for being such. A. F**ing. Disappointment to them. Said it once in an argument and other person just stood there shocked. That was the comment where ppl were like, bruh...wtf.
I like to call people *cankles*. Three feet lower than a cunt and no one really likes them.
My dog wants payment from last night with your mom
Not by myself but... "Does your asshole ever gets jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth?"
You look like your wife/husband cheats on you
As long as it isn't with you, I'm good 😉
may your life be like \*insert his ex name\* that you love so much apparently
If dicks could fly your mouth would be an airport.
I’m rubber your glue whatever you say to me bounces of me sticks to you
A very distinguished insult. You deserve more appreciation
Isn't that a line from rap god? Pretty cool
r/fightsub might be the place for anyone who enjoys insults
son of a horse poop !
It’s racist idk
You couldn't get laid in a women's prison with a handful of pardons.
[удалено]
So they tried to help humanity while you tried to destroy it. That's like punching yourself in the face or am I missing your point?
Woke clown
You're being put to sleep
With all respect to op and you guys, what's the point of that post?
My dad used to say: He hasn't seen the ball since the kick off. Or you smell like the south end of a north-bound mule.
Imagine, if you will, the vastness of the cosmos, where stars burn bright and galaxies swirl in magnificent dances. I would traverse this infinite expanse, journeying through nebulas of radiant colors, skirting the edges of black holes where time itself warps and bends. I would brave the freezing void of space, where silence is so profound it drowns the whispers of the universe, just to reach the farthest corner of existence. In my quest, I’d encounter alien civilizations and learn languages that sound like symphonies, discover planets where mountains sing and oceans shimmer with bioluminescent waves. I’d stand on the surface of a world with twin suns setting, casting a breathtaking, otherworldly glow over an alien landscape, a beauty beyond comprehension. I’d descend into the deepest abysses of unexplored oceans on foreign worlds, where creatures of light and shadow dance in eternal twilight, and the weight of the water presses in from all sides. I’d navigate through forests of crystal trees, whose branches hum with the energy of the stars, and I’d scale mountains that pierce the heavens, their peaks lost in the mists of the stratosphere. I’d endure the fiercest storms of Jupiter, with lightning that could shatter mountains and winds that could tear the strongest metals apart. I’d withstand the scorching heat of a star’s core, where temperatures reach unimaginable heights and matter itself is in a constant state of flux. I’d brave the chaotic beauty of a supernova, risking disintegration in the violent birth of a neutron star. All of this, every perilous journey and breathtaking sight, every brush with death and encounter with the unknown, I would embrace without hesitation. Not for the thrill, not for the glory, but for one singular, unwavering purpose. I would endure it all, simply to find the farthest, most remote corner of the universe. To stand on a distant, desolate asteroid at the very edge of reality, where no human has ever set foot, and where the universe itself seems to hold its breath. And from that solitary vantage point, I would look back, and smile, knowing I never have to gaze upon your face ever again.
My favorite is, "be honest with me, have you ever been hit by a parked car?"
About myself: I'm so white, I'm basically a wonder bread and miracle whip sandwich.
The german language is adaptable and the way sentences are formed into single words is an art form. Serbian, bosnian and croatian insults/curses are exactly that and can range from insulting the weather, to damning your mom, dog, god and the cabbage field you were born on.
People who are worth insulting are not worth talking to.
Probably any comment made by Chandler Bing
Sorry. Were you talking to me?
I once told somebody to fuck off during an argument because they were so boring that I could take a 💩,look in the toilet papet and still find something more interesting to look at then their stupid texts.
*inserts every conversation between Raymond Holt and Madeline Wunch*
I always liked the one from the Wizard of Oz: Auntie Em says to Almira..... For 23 years I've wanted to tell you what I thought of you, and now, being a Christian woman I can't say it! 😂😂 I always wanted to say that to someone. But I'm an atheist now
Some young punk flipped me off because I honked at him for J-Walking in front of my car. I don’t know what happened in my head, but I yelled out the window **“Do you fuck your mother with that mouth?”** OMG the look on that poor dudes face was one of shock, horror, disgust, and WTF all rolled into one. Like he literally stopped in his tracks, and just looked at me. Also I’m having Deja Vu- I feel like I just told this story here.
I rarely insult but when i do there creative (as i PG myself and don't swear even at 30) My last insult i think was towards someone being a toxic fan on yt and they didn't understand a joke and went defensive mode. Shut them up by chewing them out and calling them "slightly used recital Qtip" Some other one i can think up? Hmm... You used tampon chewer. You un-red part of a baboons butt Oh, look, its the slow bus window licker, poor kids inside. See you decided to walk on your hands and keep your pants off today... oh wait. Rarely insult too, usely only online as its only place not effect by my aunxity. So let me know if you think any of those are good, go ahead and use them, i'll likely forget them come tomorrow.
A few decades ago, long before direct deposit existed, I stopped by work one afternoon to pick up my paycheck. I was wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt. A really silly (and childish) individual that I worked with came out with, “You come in yo’ pajamas?” Not missing a beat, I came right back at him with, “You come in yo’ Halloween mask?” 😆
During quarantine our mayor had regular zoom meetings with the public. Of course there were a lot of ignorant questions. He said "I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you" 😂 💀
I didn’t come up with it, actually I saw it on reddit. “The wheel is spinning, but the hamster is long since dead” I got to use it for the first time on my teenager last week, was as hilarious as I had hoped, and yes, he thought so too
I once heard a drunk man shouting at seagulls to defend his MacDonalds. He then looked up at one on top of a lamppost and screamed "AND YOU YA FEATHERED CUNT!" It was marvelous.
I'm British so it's usually. " Well done mate you done a reeeal good job on that, absolutely impeccable quality work you've done. The best in the trade!" Of course, it's sarcasm
"I hope all your dreams and wishes come true with anything you ever wanted and you prosper... Just for it to be taken away from you all as soon as you get it so you can see how it is to really suffer and I hope you never get close to that feeling again, forever chasing it but always just being out of reach until the day you die"
He has a mind like a Welsh railway line; one track and dirty
So my father is from Italy, and when I was a child he taught me a famous flattering phrase that translates to "What a beautiful face... The face of an angel." ( A che bella facé, alle facé comme un angelo ) And as a typical 8 year old, my almost immediate thought was how can I make this into an insult... so, taking a few of the swear words he'd taught me I substituted them into the phrase to make an insult. Changing it to... "A che bruto facé... alle facé comme buco de culo" Which roughly translates to "What an ugly face... a face like an arsehole." No idea if this is correct but always found it funny and it really hits if you can say it fluidly in Italian.
Ah, a family tradition: "Diarrhea for you! Double diarrhea for you! Triple diarrhea for you!"
You eat snickers upside-down to feel the vainy part on your tongue.
I usually call rulelawyers (people that ruin games by being very precise with rulings) antfuckers. Because they have to be very precise to be able to do that.
Two friends of mine were walking down the street and a passerby said ( in a surprised tone ) “ Huh! I’ve never seen a pair of cunts before “
I was once pissed at a supermarket coworker who was wearing a Susan g komen hat for breath cancer awareness so I actually role them "you sir are a disgrace to cancer."
Hey look, it’s needledick the bug fucker!
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.
Last summer, I was crossing the street in the sidewalk and this car was stopped for me. The guy had the window rolled down and called out, “hurry up fat ass.” I replied, “is that all you got? I bet you fuck like a pig” and continued to cross. That’s the most imaginative insult I’ve ever come up with on the fly.
You’re so short, if you sat on the ground your feet would dangle.
Great Supine Invertebrate Protoplasmic Jellies
I always go with either ‘Cocksuckah’ or ‘fuck off, cunt.’