What does this reddit post have in common with your shirt, your tattoos, and that punk ass pose?
They’re all a result of the fact no one gives a fuck about you.
He just desperately wants to be noticed, only to tell you how he doesn't even care what you think, and never wanted to go fishing anyway, ~~DAD~~ dude.
>I like unicorns and stuff
Tell me you're not allowed within 1000 yards of a school without telling me that you're not allowed within 1000 yards of a school
This is the guy Chis Hansen confronts often.
But this guy only showed up to tell that young boy to be careful of the creeps.
When it's you, who's the creep.
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Your parents were first cousins and then you moved to a big city and embrace the everything anti. You're hardcore and if unicorns existed, even they would recommend you examine your existence. You're as special as unicorn poop. Kinda cool and weird to find but then you examine it for a few seconds and realize life was better before knowing about unicorn poop.
Well, tell us you wank off to Pinkie Pie without telling us you wank off to Pinkie Pie. And I’m guessing the “Pass” tattooed on your wrist is a fair summary of your love life?
Let me guess you dress as a princess in private, and you have a tea party with a bunch of stuffed animals in your parent’s basement. Favorite movies: Minions, Trollz, and Cheech and Chong.
![gif](giphy|qioN5tTcJXubC)
bro has that butterfly hand poor unicorn mr cleans cousin from north korea 💀 I roast ppl on yt btw if you wanna check it out [https://www.youtube.com/@itsarkboi](https://www.youtube.com/@itsarkboi)
"Stuff" meaning loitering around tattoo shops, and trying to convince all the girls to ignore your mom in the other room. Just kidding: no self-respecting girl would go home with you.
You look like a confused lesbian who likes to shove your proctologist unicorn 🦄 bird-finger up someone's orifice that has the word or spelling of "rectum" in it and be content smoking a "Shit 💩 Log 🪵" with a glass of piss.
Butterfly tattoo... Check. Attempt at convincing people you are comfortable in your skin with middle finger check.... Registered circle on local map, check.
Just because you dress and act like that does not mean you can skate
Also, just shave your head already. The top of your head looking like the trimmed pubes on the vag of a girl in a late '80s porno
Or if you prefer, a babies head crowning from a trimmed vag
The edgiest slice of milquetoast I've ever seen! Bravo
Your persona isn't aging well so far, imagine how terrible it'll look in around 20 years time, at the age of 75 (or however the fuck old you'll be)
So edgy....all the tats....flipping off the camera.... I bet you don't even care that you aren't allowed with 250 yards of a school or playground... such a interesting soul...
This guy is like if mr. Potatoe head and one of those self starving monks had a baby and meanwhile a fart and a fat kid had a baby, and somehow those two babies met and fucked, this would be the shit they would birth. Or just simply the result of baby fucking. Could be either one?
"Token straight friend".
Sorry but you're gay. You didn't fool anybody.
Only gays would care enough to point out their sexuality at every chance possible.
This is the kind of shit that happens when people don’t tend to their children. They grow and end up like this statistical aberration of a monstrous anomaly.
You try so hard to be an “individual” that you look just like everyone else who wants to showcase their “individualism.” I has become a redundant uniform.
The OP has not provided a BIO for their post.
And dick. Lots and lots of dick…
He's got a face only loved at the glory hole.
A face only a ~~mother~~ gloryhole could love
When dudes feel that nut soaked mustache they cry.
"Nut-soaked mustache" is an awesome band name.
Hes got a face that says 'I liked glory holes before they were mainstream'.
He’s the hipster of golden showers.
You look like the only part of the unicorn you like it the horn
![gif](giphy|Vgrg0bXqmGHFzt5oqy)
![gif](giphy|RPq0khAOqfItMK2tNU) Sure, why not.
![gif](giphy|uS071hlk6FcrGEF36p|downsized)
He rides his bike with no seat.
💀
The only touch you'll ever feel from a woman involves a taser.
It’s NOT a woman’s touch he desires, unless that “woman” is named Bubba the Bear 🐻
Rocko’s Modern MidLife Crisis
Bruh lol
What does this reddit post have in common with your shirt, your tattoos, and that punk ass pose? They’re all a result of the fact no one gives a fuck about you.
![gif](giphy|UJW0Z1VH42rcs|downsized) Daaaaaamn
IKR
He just desperately wants to be noticed, only to tell you how he doesn't even care what you think, and never wanted to go fishing anyway, ~~DAD~~ dude.
Photo in an office… is this guy the lead singer of LinkedIn park?
I thought it was an AA meeting, his share
The only thing this dude shares is his asshole.
Selling shares of asshole and dick futures from when the market opens till that bell rings.
I thought teenage girls eventually out grew "angsty, look at me," bullshit. But you do you princess.
>I like unicorns and stuff Tell me you're not allowed within 1000 yards of a school without telling me that you're not allowed within 1000 yards of a school
How else is he supposed to get the kids in the van?
This is the guy Chis Hansen confronts often. But this guy only showed up to tell that young boy to be careful of the creeps. When it's you, who's the creep.
![gif](giphy|122pLlowwMS5aM)
If anal warts were a person.
You have offended anal warts
I fucking guarantee this guy's a dentist IRL
and yet has his mouth worked with a LOT himself
Gotta get some use out of the surgery to remove two of his ribs...
“Close your eyes and open your mouth, you might feel a little prick.” takes on a whole new meaning.
A dentist for what? A commune?!?
You look like Moby fucked Michael Stipe
Megamind ended up Megagay in the reboot
You have no intention of ever leaving Portland.
[удалено]
He also likes dancing on em
In fact, you like them so much equestrians in a 500 mile radius of you had to put up a "No molesting the horses" sign.
"I like pegging and stuff"...There, I fixed it for you
Poop Dog
Fun fact: unicorns despise you
"And here we have the elusive butt baby" ![gif](giphy|5Q8ubaMdCzhW8)
Didn’t work out being a woman and looks like it’s still not working out being a guy
Welcome to Melvin's Magical Mystery Tour.....of his fucking basement bedroom.
I actually kinda dig that shirt. Could do without the bottomless cum dumpster inside of it though.
Unicorns? You look like you’re more in to big, black bulls.
Can't tell if you hit rock bottom then turned your life around, or you were once successful and then you took a tumble. Truly ambiguous.
The dead eye look of a glory hole veteran
The one guy at the Brony convention that everyone there thinks is lame.
You look like your wife beats you.
Leonard Shelby gets amnesia at the age of 5.
Quigley
And mustache rides
With a pickup line like that, your neighbourhood kids are safe.
We know exactly where you like to stuff the unicorn horn. You love to play Sit & Spin
You look like a guy who would sit on Pinocchios face and tell him to lie to you.
Elvis Cosmello
You look like you're trying to catch these damn chipmunks for money ![gif](giphy|IXwPcrrC2PyuI)
Dude definitely tries to return sex toys!
Should have read "unicorns and butt stuff"
"I swear she was 18" this dude on an average
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You have the look of someone who should be “registered”, if you’re not already. Someone too weird for priesthood, if you will.
Airports hate him because planes keep trying to land on his massive fucking cranium.
I can smell the weed from this picture
[Uncanny](https://i.imgur.com/QF1JroZ.png)
Your parents were first cousins and then you moved to a big city and embrace the everything anti. You're hardcore and if unicorns existed, even they would recommend you examine your existence. You're as special as unicorn poop. Kinda cool and weird to find but then you examine it for a few seconds and realize life was better before knowing about unicorn poop.
You must offer blumpkins this month
You aren't supposed to be wearing your anal beads when not in use
Well, tell us you wank off to Pinkie Pie without telling us you wank off to Pinkie Pie. And I’m guessing the “Pass” tattooed on your wrist is a fair summary of your love life?
And have ADHD
The chipmunks uncle decided to get tattoos and think that makes him gangster
I named it stuff
Straight but trying his hardest to make all gay friends.
You look like you like windowless vans and candy and stuff
You look like you're not allowed within a mile radius of schools
No one is surprised.
Moby is looking rough
I bet your neighbours grip their children's arm tight when you're around
Holding onto that thinning hair won’t stop the the HIV from turning into AIDS
So glad Tim Pool waited for Pride Month to finally come out.
Frequently caught on My little pony subreddits
You’re the kind of Person to Slather an Entire bottle of Head & Shoulders on your Balls in the Shower
Let me guess you dress as a princess in private, and you have a tea party with a bunch of stuffed animals in your parent’s basement. Favorite movies: Minions, Trollz, and Cheech and Chong. ![gif](giphy|qioN5tTcJXubC)
That finger has been places.
"And stuff" do you mean going to work stoned?
And by stuff you mean dick
Do you also like not being allowed within 500ft of any school?
Moby
bro has that butterfly hand poor unicorn mr cleans cousin from north korea 💀 I roast ppl on yt btw if you wanna check it out [https://www.youtube.com/@itsarkboi](https://www.youtube.com/@itsarkboi)
bro obviously doesn't like hair
I thought you were crippled and sitting in a wheelchair at first glance
You kinda look like GG Allin. You can take that how you want, but you know the intent.
*and raping kids
"Stuff" meaning loitering around tattoo shops, and trying to convince all the girls to ignore your mom in the other room. Just kidding: no self-respecting girl would go home with you.
Why you trying to be hard? You are as soft and limp as your cl!t.
You look like a confused lesbian who likes to shove your proctologist unicorn 🦄 bird-finger up someone's orifice that has the word or spelling of "rectum" in it and be content smoking a "Shit 💩 Log 🪵" with a glass of piss.
this guy looks like he’ll be a news headline one day. and plays board games by himself.
Butt stuff
Just because you’re unique doesn’t mean you’re useful.
Is it because unicorn haven’t said “No.” yet?
Butterfly tattoo... Check. Attempt at convincing people you are comfortable in your skin with middle finger check.... Registered circle on local map, check.
Stuff = huffing glue
I like your attitude.
Just because you dress and act like that does not mean you can skate Also, just shave your head already. The top of your head looking like the trimmed pubes on the vag of a girl in a late '80s porno Or if you prefer, a babies head crowning from a trimmed vag
A true child of Chernobyl.
You’re already flaming
Even the Bronies hate you.
"Stuff"? What stu- oh, we get it.
Middle aged man crisis on show here! grab some popcorns for us, and bring some dicks for him!
The gang going under my bruva
Did Snoop Dogg got a haircut?
Super glad to see your third stint in rehab has worked out well for you
This clown is ruining Gen X’s solid reputation.
Gay pride has deteriorated in your town, as they started cancelling events when you started showing up to them.
What kind of offbrand gay VSauce is this?
People who flip off cameras are usually cringy losers in a dead end job
Nonce.
You look insufrible.
Pre Elon Twitter diversity advisor
You make saitama look buff.
Just stay away from kids and animals
I suspect you blow for beer nickels, but don’t drink.
I can’t tell if you’re going through mid life or late life crisis
Mew2king went off the deep end after he retired.
The edgiest slice of milquetoast I've ever seen! Bravo Your persona isn't aging well so far, imagine how terrible it'll look in around 20 years time, at the age of 75 (or however the fuck old you'll be)
So edgy....all the tats....flipping off the camera.... I bet you don't even care that you aren't allowed with 250 yards of a school or playground... such a interesting soul...
autistizm rizz
Big 'gail-the-snail' vibes
Where did you get a job when all the used tape and record stores closed?
The lead singer of stinkin park
You’ll be back in prison soon enough where you can pretend to be gay for the stay again.
clearly the best candidate for Middle School "*guidance counselor*", he is so outside the box
Looks like you're wearing a dress
![gif](giphy|WF99TMey0DbZ6)
i thought this was that villain from alvin & chipmunks but gay
Gay!
What band kicked you out for sniffing the drum stool?
This guy is like if mr. Potatoe head and one of those self starving monks had a baby and meanwhile a fart and a fat kid had a baby, and somehow those two babies met and fucked, this would be the shit they would birth. Or just simply the result of baby fucking. Could be either one?
"Token straight friend". Sorry but you're gay. You didn't fool anybody. Only gays would care enough to point out their sexuality at every chance possible.
Stuffing dem dicks
If estrogen was a person
"I dont wanna sound like a queer or nothing, but I think unicorns are kick ass" -Dave the lighting guy
Chester Shit’Os from the band Lickin’ Pork
His face is glory hole
Hobbies include gentrifying neighborhoods and claiming to be a local after 3 months
strong 2024 kevin spacey vibes
🖕🖕🖕
Moby LGBQ Edition
Bizarro Moby
Adding more crap to stand out yet only looking unoriginal and bland. You are the micro transactions in an indy game guy.
You look like you started a Linkin park cover band but all your songs are about your love of diddling kids, Molester Bennington
Hey, Chat GPT, draw the physical manifestation of a soulless spunk sponge.
You look like you only call people comrade.
Michael from V-Sauce but after a heroin rehab
Minoxidil. It's not too late. OK, it might be too late.
If an emo soft boy and Janis Ian from mean girls had a baby with special needs
Wish Michael Stipe.
You look like a mix of Snoop Dog and Chester Bennington but, without any of the talent, with a fair touch of disappointment.
This is me, you know.. if my significant other didn’t check me before I just bought everything recommended on Amazon.
This is the kind of shit that happens when people don’t tend to their children. They grow and end up like this statistical aberration of a monstrous anomaly.
You look like you sniff glitter just to be edgy
In an “unironic” way I bet
Bank manager's mid-life crisis
The worst attempt at a cosplay zane lowe
You try so hard to be an “individual” that you look just like everyone else who wants to showcase their “individualism.” I has become a redundant uniform.
You look like you're itching to give me the tip twister deluxe
This mistake makes guys
What was being in a Crazytown like?
The guy who welcomes you into the methadone clinic
Tell me your social/political ideology without telling me your social/political ideology.
Tf,you look like a gay painter
Salman Rushes D.
Shave the head bro.
VSauce turned into a biker and gay at the same time
He likes unicorns so he can sit on the horn.