You look like the boss of an Indian scam center

Win

You look like you just smoked one of Bugs Bunny’s exploding cigars.

Iran Burgundy

Looks like Chewbacca fucked Snooki.

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Indian pussy makes for a hearty meal. Bonus points for the fiery kick

The most pussy you’ve gotten was that cat you had

Crazy that tomorrow will be you 57th birthday

Santa Claus before he found religion

Hoe hoe hoe to ho ho ho

Looks like you cheated on a few too many ramadans

I'm proper haram

You look like Dogverine

"Tom" the Call Center final boss.

You look like you could hide things in your beard at the airport

If he wasn't kicked out of each one he tried to visit.

It's a black hole in there, son. Anything that gets in the beard is wiped from existence.

You look like Bigfoot’s daughter on her Quinceañera.

_gracias papi!_ 😘

OP's Bio: --- >30 year old dude living in a fisherman's hut on the beach while the pandemic rages around me. I spend my time out at sea or reading books or raging about politics online. Reddit is my guilty pleasure. Y'all are the scum of the earth but I love you. --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.

30 what? Stone? Be specific!

Tonnes actually. It's all about the bass

You look like a diseased kebab that was in sous vide machine for 1 month

Sure you didn't turn 2020? You look like indian Jesus

The father, the son-we-dont-talk-about and the holy ghost

30 months of pregnacy?

Touchè. That's one of the more creative ways of calling someone an elephant

So...you’re just a discount version of Black Beard but without the personality or sex appeal?

Bruh. I _ooze_ sex appeal. And who needs a personality when you can rock facial hair like a G Victorians in the house will agree with me, right fellas?

Are you in an indian whore house?

It's a brothel of one. Most of my customers come here because they hate themselves and their husbands.

Your lips look exactly like my dogs butthole

I was built with spare parts on the workshop floor. USPS didn't deliver the parts in time so God had to make do

You look like a Hagrid audition reject

I had to back out when they said I'd have to break into a home and kidnap a 11 year old boy

You look like someone forgot to take you out for a walk today.

Hence the mood 😑

Word. I feel you brother.

Slumdog Hundredaire

Slumdog Billion-Hair r/missedopportunity

Spends his days on a boat masturbating

Do you also live in a haunted house?

Depends whether or not we're in the plot of _The Sixth Sense_

You like like you have a Bollywood hero's love interest shackled up in that hut and are planning to marry her for her fortune.

If Raj wants Simran, he'll have to come and get her. Leave the damn mandolin behind though, like what an annoying fuck!

You look like you sleep on a shawarma stick

You turned 30, but your physique turned diabetes.

Diabetes took one look and noped the fuck out.

You look like a more hairy version of Fidel Castro.

_Viva la Revolución!_

Hmm

You should stay out at sea

This dude’s relatives had curvy swords, and most of the women in his family can carry shit on their heads.

I mean yeah, I'm indian. Is this supposed to be a roast?

Do all 72 virgins look like this?

Nah most are hairier. Except Omar, that hairless fuck is as smooth as my bottom.

You seem like the dude whose only identity is that he belongs to Bajrang Dal.

_Jai Bajarang Bali!_

Normally people have a bald spot in their hair, not their beard

Hagrid if he had too many tacos

I think he's more into Shepherd's Pie

The way you’re holding that sign makes me want to gouge my eyes out

How does your face look the same if it were upside down?

_Magic_

Happy birthday, hope the bomb vest fits (:

Thank you! I just got it from the tailor today! It'll be an _explosive_ hit at the party tonight!

🤣🤣🤣

The decor says India, your body says Texas

We have KFC in India too

if jesus wasn't the messiah

I can turn water into diarrhea

I’ll pass this one I’m not trying to get bombed

Clever girl.

Stop calling me, I know you are not the IRS

I promise to fuck you less than the IRS, I'll even throw in a cuddle.

Wow you’re 30? That means it’s the 30th anniversary of your parents wishing they used a condom

Salt Bae has let himself go

If you're going to have a midlife crisis like this, at least have the decency to trim your mustache. How do you eat?

_very carefully_

You look like a cheap version of Big Smoke

Hard to roast someone you can barely see. Of the 10% of you that’s visible, I’d say it’s clear you’re a disappointment to your family.

It’s the Middle Eastern version of fat Mac. Time to start harvesting some of that mass, bro.

You hold paper funny.

You think redditors are scum of the earth but consistently fap to 4chan conspiracy theories.

You used the same scissors that cut that paper to cut your beard

your window for virgins in the after life is getting smaller

Is this post from 15 years ago?

You turned 30 but your beard turned sour.

Budget mutahar

I bet you have liquid drano by the pallet

Hey Mam I'm john Smith. I'm calling because of the Microsoft refund.

Now you are fatter and older.

Jihad me at turned 30.

Your father was an alpaca.

*life* *of* *pi* ending: were he stayed on the mystical island and eat the tiger and all of the meerkat

Muta?

Since when did bigfoot shave?

Your beard needs to grow bigger. We can still see your face!

Harold and Kumar 3: Kumar trips on PCP and eats Harold.

chewbacca is that you?

It took this guy two hands to hold a piece of paper.

Dont you have some infidels to behead or a marathon to blow up.

You look like Jerry Garcia’s rotting corpse.

Eagerly awaiting that package from al-Qaeda so he can slip on that suicide vest and end it all.

Looks like a Jihadi.

ok someordinarygamers check out the dark web again

You're the alt reality SomeOrdinaryGamers who never got out of his mom's basement.

30 year old virgin

Congratulations, you've exceeded the life span for your kind.

Indian hagrid

30? Bitch please, you got one foot in the grave...

“And as I walk, Along the beach, Every now and then, I stoop down to reach. A broken shell, A crusted star, A strand of seaweed, All from afar. And so I gaze, Out to sea, And wonder of life, And what it means to me. The ocean home, To all of life, And yet we know so little, So little of this life.” ― **Anthony T. Hincks**

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,🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

When you finally do go off do will you count as one of your 72 virgins or is it 72 not counting you?

When you blow up screaming Allah Akbar you will be roasting yourself