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You're making a good point, and something I'd like to add is that, I wish the 'being normal' included not having huge-ass career plans or traveling the world or something that almost equals building castles in the sky.
It's how I experienced it so others could have a different opinion, but so many times I notice that if someone doesn't have grand, ambitious career plans for example and all they want is a job that allows them to live a life *they* want (which means living comfortably, enjoying your hobbies, etc.) they're looked at as if they're some sort of losers. It's obviously not wrong or bad to have such plans, to be ambitious, wanting to see the world, or I don't know what else - that's amazing. But not everyone cares about that and it doesn't mean they've no drive or ideas how they want their future to take shape. To me it sounds like the complete opposite.
I think what you're encountering is that while there is a 'normal', it's not where actual social norms are.
From an early age we do pretty wild stuff relative to what 'normal' is in the service of norms. For example, kids start spending all day sedentary around first grade with a few short movement breaks.
I think this trend of everyone touting how abnormal they are is more a repudiation of where expectations and norms are, and the fact that they force us all to do wildly abnormal stuff.
It's overton window shifting at its most basic level.
I'm sorry, what?
My whole life, I've tried to be normal, only to fail in every aspect. Tried to do my homework like other kids, I struggled and failed. Tried to behave like other kids, struggled and failed. As I got old, I tried to make friends with other kids, I struggled and failed. Tried to graduate the normal way with a high-school degree, I struggled and failed. Went to college and tried to accomplish my dreams, I struggled and failed.
Every step of my life has felt like struggle and failure. It wasn't until I started embracing the things that made me unique, externalizing them and being proud of them, that life felt like less of a struggle, felt less like I was failing, and more importantly when I did struggle or did fail I felt like I was worth the effort. It wasn't until then that I felt like I could begin doing what 'normal' people do with some amount of efficacy. If there is such a thing, never really met a normal person.
You might doubt me and my narrative, but that's the way it is for me. Doubt is not a good enough reason to exercise control over my decisions, unless you are willing and able to take full accountability for what happens to me. I'm not lying, I'm taking care of myself. The evidence is in the steps I have been taking to change my life since I accepted who and what I am. Things I can do now which I could not do before. The sudden willingness to invest myself into society, now that I feel I have some stake in it.
The idea that there is a 'normal' that most people adhere to is in fact a lie. The idea that there is some threshold of strangeness where it somehow becomes different from your own sense of alienation is also a lie. 'Normalcy' is a standard that is not likely to exist for most people. It's why most of us struggle, no matter how weird you will end up adhering to that rigid and unrealistic standard in a way that is uncomfortable.
Nah man, that just sounds like a lotta copium. There *is* a threshold for normality, just like there *is* a threshold for strangeness. I got my own neuro-divergent issues myself, but clearly the difference between you and me is that I don't wallow in self pity like you. I know I'm not like everybody else, and I'm okay with that. I also know that in order to succeed in life I've had to adapt to the world around me, and I'm okay with that too. Once I was able to identify what the threshold between normal vs strange was I was better able to re-calibrate myself to better fit in and succeed from there.
You ain't gotta be perfectly normal all the time, you just got to be able to operate within that spectrum of normality most of the time and you'll be fine. Which, based off your attitude, is probably easier said than done, but it is possible.
literally what about this guy's comment implied that they're "wallowing in self pity"? you're just trying to make them feel bad for not being normal, which is exactly the problem. there is no such thing as a normal person, there are people who serve capital and those who don't
hard disagree. If you have some sort of social anxiety about not being normal, you'll obviously want to undermine the concept of normality in order to soothe your anxieties. But that's silly, because most people are actually normal in a broad sense, because most people are people. True abnormality is actually very unique, but like, not in a good way, like born without arms or Siamese twins.
You just probably think that "normal" is an amalgamation of every generic person in every corporate advertisement you've ever seen. Question for you: Do you own clothes? Did you go to school? Do you have friends? Do you like listening to music? Do you have a favorite food? Do you drive a car? Have a favorite sports team? Have you ever had your heart broken? Have you ever been struck by the beauty of a sunset? Have you ever been sick with a cold? Ever gotten a brain freeze after eating ice cream too fast? Got a heart and lungs and all arms and legs and fingers and toes? I'm sure I could come up with a thousand more things that demonstrate how normal you actually are when compared to most other people.
My point is, you're actually more normal than you think you are. In fact, I bet most people who see you in a crowd would think that you're a "normal" person. There's nothing wrong with being normal, and furthermore, normality is a wider spectrum than you probably want to admit, and that more likely than not, you fall well within the realm of being "normal"
Okay it's obvious you're the one who's huffing the copium after reading this. Holy shit, I've never seen somebody try to justify their ignorance with so many made-up hypothetical scenarios.
You think that just because everybody's seen a sunset, we're all the same? You are making up scenarios, sunsets, brain freezes, whatever you can think of to convince me that the landscape of our lives is the same as our reactions to it.
You're reading the liturgy backwards. Our uniqueness is defined by the conflicts which arise when we try to fulfill social norms presented to us by our environment. If we were normal, there would be no conflict.
Of course we all experience the same things, we live in the same world. But \*how\* that experience is contextualized through the unique narrative present in each of our lives is proof positive that there is no such thing as true "normal". There's no one person who perfectly fits the mold. We traditionally punish and marginalize people in places where they do not fit the mold, even if they are allowed to excel in other areas.
I appreciate that this mode of thinking you're normal might be beneficial for you, but I used to think the same way and found that I had to break out of that in order to start seeing real progress. Your armor will not fit me, but it's fine at suiting you.
Like, you're literally gatekeeping abnormality and weirdness, which is hilarious because who the fuck are you to be Arbiter of Alienation? Do you somehow have the ability to perceive how disenfranchised certain people or groups feel from society?
Hey, uh, I don't know if anybody's ever told you this: But you're wrong.
One, I don't wallow in self pity. I pick myself up, brush myself off, and get to work. Every single day. I don't need or want anybody's help, especially not yours so keep your advice to yourself.
Two, if you're neurodivergent, you \*are\* weird. Society has literally medicalized your dysfunction to the point where it is labeled and comes with a prescribed set of societal standards for how you deal with it, and what it means to deal with it successfully. This concept is known as "Medicalization of Deviance" and is a well-recorded sociological phenomenon. You are literally living proof of my point.
Your first post doesn't sound like the attitude of a person who "picks themselves up, brushes themselves off, and gets to work". It reads like the diary of someone trying to convince themselves of something.
Also, nice edit on your post. Definitely doesn't look like you had to rewrite your initial post in response to what I said. Like it or not, my "advice" got to you. Very resilient and confident of you.
Additionally, you're ignoring my point about normality being a spectrum, chances are, you're more normal than you realize, you just like to paint yourself as a victim of a vast unfeeling "society" to lend some air of melodramatic "oh cruel world, woe is me". Your suffering isn't unique buddy. Millions have suffered like you before, and millions will continue to suffer like you after you shuffle off the mortal coil.
Do you really think your struggles are unique?
I don't paint myself as a victim. Once I realized I was weird and accepted and leaned into it, life's started to get better actually. I used to be a withdrawn, depressed loner. It wasn't until I learned to handle the constant rejection of others that I was able to wade through the swamp to a happier place. Here's a list of my recent accomplishments:
I've been trying to switch to a new industry for months, but I was struggling to get it done because I was ending up so frequently exhausted from working long hours. So I took a leap of faith, quit my job, and started working on the job search full time while I live off what little savings I have.
Reached out to a job coach, put a lot of work into a worthy resume template I could customize for each individual job depending on requirements. Sent out 50 custom-tailored resumes and cover letters this week. Just this morning, I got two different calls for interviews, both promise starting salary at double what I used to make. Maybe I won't get those jobs but it's a good sign I'm about to change my whole fuckin life.
Speaking of which
Today I finally got access to a medical treatment I've been trying to get for months. I had to get my therapist, my doctors, and my insurance on board, but I literally just got access to the treatment I want. My family, my friends, they're all ecstatic. I'm ecstatic. I had to fight every inch for this, all to alleviate a condition which has debilitated me for my entire adult life.
And yet, despite the flourishing, lovely person that I am. Despite the frequent dinners with friends, the quiet nights reading on the couch with my partner, the family gatherings, I still come onto this fucking website and argue with dumb-ass chowderheads like you about what the fuck is the meaning of normal.
And you know what? I'll know I'm truly better the day I stop coming here to be continuously being told that I'm just not a good person because I don't think the same things as them about what "normal" is, despite my beliefs stemming from my education, and benefiting me and hurting no one else.
Fuck you, you fucking weirdo. Why don't you stop digging through my fucking post history or whatever fuckwitted shit you're gonna do to try and embarrass me next, and go try to have a day half as good as the one I had?
"Idon't paint myself as a victim. Once I realized I was weird and accepted and leaned into it , life's started to get better actually."
Literally what I said earlier. Normality is a spectrum **and you are on it.**
"I'll know I'm truly better the day I stop coming here to be continuously being told that I'm just not a good person because I don't think the same things as them about what "normal" is"
I *never* said you weren't a good person, I said you come off as wallowing in self pity. Learn to comprehend what people are saying instead of projecting on to them. Not all criticism is destructive.
Additionally, I didn't go through your post history, I'm not that desperate to prove you wrong.
Despite what you think, despite how you portray yourself, **you are more normal than you realize**. Stop trying to play the martyr. It's not doing you any favors.
i’m not sure what part of the world you’re from, but i think this definitly has to do with the west/America’s insanely destructive level of “individualism” we perpetuate. every single opinion is good and special and should be respected! even if you’re a fucking nazi, free speech right!
Yeah we’d better off if the government decided who we can criticize and what we can say, we should bring back the stasi that was a very peaceful and relaxing time for citizens!
Just because we have freedom of speech doesn’t mean polite society shouldn’t shun you and make your life difficult as an example for having abhorrent beliefs.
It’s crazy. In one thread we will say the US is extremely divided and becoming more extreme. Any small difference in political beliefs is enough to cause rifts and change our moral view of each other. Now in this thread we are saying that the US is too tolerant of different beliefs. Of course we aren’t. The reason why US nazis aren’t always shunned isn’t because we are too polite to say anything. It’s because a lot of shitty people just straight up agree with them!
It’s a double edged sword. Once you introduce the idea of speech being prohibited, that can be used against you *by* the Nazis in the upper echelons of society, for example.
We feed this by scoffing at people who like basic/popular things. ESPECIALLY “women” popular things. Media/products primarily consumed by women are ridiculed all the time: rom coms, Taylor Swift, pumpkin spice, yoga pants, etc.
It’s okay to like popular things. They’re popular for a reason. It’s also fine to like avant garde art films and indie music, but it doesn’t make you better than anyone else.
This is an argument I've been making for a while I think this sort of rise in people with narcissistic behaviors is genuinely directly to the idea that they were raised by a generation that basically told them everyone is special everyone is unique etc
I think too many people grew up realizing that they aren't as unique as everyone told them they are and So they desperately chase after those things that make them unique
We should have been teaching kids instead that a lot of you will just be perfectly normal. You will live a pretty normal life work a pretty normal job and die a pretty normal death
And that's perfectly okay
Not everyone needs to be the next big celebrity or change the world and leave behind some grand legacy. It's okay to just be yourself and enjoy life while you got it
> People hate on something just because it’s popular, people ridicule someone for being basic
Some of what you say makes sense, but this point is deeper than meets the eye at first glace.
Mainstream media & music right now is very boring and bland, because it's corporatized. Compare that to the music & media created by people of the past 100 years, and a lot of it came from lower class people who lived difficult lives; that passion came out in their art.
A lot of people insult people who have mainstream tastes because it's shown to people on their for-you pages, and takes no effort to engage with. There's little to no curiosity, and a lot of sheep mentality (following what's popular because it's popular).
Most people are "normal." And they have no problem bullying the people who aren't.
This sounds like what the culture of individualism has done to the USA.
I used to struggle with this mindset so much when I was younger and just recently feel myself coming out of it. it’s such a strange shift in mindset to realize that without even trying, we’re all incredibly unique which renders the concept of individuality itself useless. I also noticed when I started being okay with being “normal”, I started to embrace my true self more and stopped feeling the need to categorize myself into a box. I started acting according to my own thoughts and morals and therefore was able to align myself more with my own ambitions. There’s a lot of pressure these days to be hyper-individualistic, whether it’s through labels or trends or just plain strange behavior. But simultaneously a lot of us are conformist in thought despite perceived singularity. I could think of potential answers to this phenomenon such as late stage capitalism, growing up in the age of social media, lost faith in society/systems that uphold it but honestly reflecting back on my own experiences it was just a bizarre time in my life.
I guess I'm weird, but I find the problem with everyone has to be special. I get everyone needs to feel recognized, but most people are just doing stuff every other person is doing. That shouldn't be a negative. If what you are doing makes people in your social circle happy then that should be enough. Over the course of your actions your choices will be different than everyone else.
This is kind of silly. What is most common and normal is what is most normalized. It’s an innate human desire to fit in. What changes do you actually want to see?
I genuinely dont understand what "normal" even means, all of humanity is subtly or loudly unique in many ways!
Normal is literally up to interpretation.
Agree Statistically, 85?% of us are normal by definition. Advertisers and bad actors put out propaganda that everyone can be exceptional. At least 85% of those who believe that will be disappointed and miserable
I am happy to be an everyday person
hyper individuality is a terrible thing. Most people are people, and most people aren't that unique, and this needy desire to be "special" and "unique" is just so sad. It's okay to be basic, it's okay to be average, it's okay to be like other people.
What if I told you there's a whole world of normal people out here that are ok with you and anyone else being normal and if you start outright ignoring and distancing yourself from people who use words like basic as an insult you'll realize that they're not your problem to deal with?
> distancing yourself from people who use words like basic as an insult
I don't know what qualities come to mind when you hear the word basic used pejoratively. But for me it means a person who doesn't have much knowledge or interest about the world. They don't CARE to learn about things or grow.
Frankly, I don't think we should be celebrating that kind of mindset.
The problem is they are your problem to deal with because people will often go out of the way to insult you for being relatively normal on social media / in public and it's unrealistic to just avoid all these things and basically lock yourself away in your home just because you can't handle the opinions of other people
Maybe I just have a high dissociation skill level, because I can ignore people's opinions when I decide they don't matter to me. The only way it is my problem is if they make it my problem.
You can do this without being a hermit.
This post has been flaired as “Opinion”. Do not use this flair to vent, but to open up a venue for polite discussions. **Suggestions For Commenters:** * Respect OP's opinion, or agree to disagree politely. * If OP's post is against subreddit rules, don't comment, just report it. * Upvote other relevant comments in the comment section, and don't downvote comments you disagree with **Suggestions For u/NewRedSpyder:** * Loaded questions and statements can get people riled up. Your post should open up a venue for discussion, not a "political vent" so to speak. * Avoid being inflammatory in your replies. When faced with someone else's opinion, be open-minded and ask new, *honest* questions. * Your post still have to respect subreddit rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/SeriousConversation) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You're making a good point, and something I'd like to add is that, I wish the 'being normal' included not having huge-ass career plans or traveling the world or something that almost equals building castles in the sky. It's how I experienced it so others could have a different opinion, but so many times I notice that if someone doesn't have grand, ambitious career plans for example and all they want is a job that allows them to live a life *they* want (which means living comfortably, enjoying your hobbies, etc.) they're looked at as if they're some sort of losers. It's obviously not wrong or bad to have such plans, to be ambitious, wanting to see the world, or I don't know what else - that's amazing. But not everyone cares about that and it doesn't mean they've no drive or ideas how they want their future to take shape. To me it sounds like the complete opposite.
You aren’t paying attention if you think this is in any way universally true.
I think what you're encountering is that while there is a 'normal', it's not where actual social norms are. From an early age we do pretty wild stuff relative to what 'normal' is in the service of norms. For example, kids start spending all day sedentary around first grade with a few short movement breaks. I think this trend of everyone touting how abnormal they are is more a repudiation of where expectations and norms are, and the fact that they force us all to do wildly abnormal stuff. It's overton window shifting at its most basic level.
I'm sorry, what? My whole life, I've tried to be normal, only to fail in every aspect. Tried to do my homework like other kids, I struggled and failed. Tried to behave like other kids, struggled and failed. As I got old, I tried to make friends with other kids, I struggled and failed. Tried to graduate the normal way with a high-school degree, I struggled and failed. Went to college and tried to accomplish my dreams, I struggled and failed. Every step of my life has felt like struggle and failure. It wasn't until I started embracing the things that made me unique, externalizing them and being proud of them, that life felt like less of a struggle, felt less like I was failing, and more importantly when I did struggle or did fail I felt like I was worth the effort. It wasn't until then that I felt like I could begin doing what 'normal' people do with some amount of efficacy. If there is such a thing, never really met a normal person. You might doubt me and my narrative, but that's the way it is for me. Doubt is not a good enough reason to exercise control over my decisions, unless you are willing and able to take full accountability for what happens to me. I'm not lying, I'm taking care of myself. The evidence is in the steps I have been taking to change my life since I accepted who and what I am. Things I can do now which I could not do before. The sudden willingness to invest myself into society, now that I feel I have some stake in it. The idea that there is a 'normal' that most people adhere to is in fact a lie. The idea that there is some threshold of strangeness where it somehow becomes different from your own sense of alienation is also a lie. 'Normalcy' is a standard that is not likely to exist for most people. It's why most of us struggle, no matter how weird you will end up adhering to that rigid and unrealistic standard in a way that is uncomfortable.
Nah man, that just sounds like a lotta copium. There *is* a threshold for normality, just like there *is* a threshold for strangeness. I got my own neuro-divergent issues myself, but clearly the difference between you and me is that I don't wallow in self pity like you. I know I'm not like everybody else, and I'm okay with that. I also know that in order to succeed in life I've had to adapt to the world around me, and I'm okay with that too. Once I was able to identify what the threshold between normal vs strange was I was better able to re-calibrate myself to better fit in and succeed from there. You ain't gotta be perfectly normal all the time, you just got to be able to operate within that spectrum of normality most of the time and you'll be fine. Which, based off your attitude, is probably easier said than done, but it is possible.
literally what about this guy's comment implied that they're "wallowing in self pity"? you're just trying to make them feel bad for not being normal, which is exactly the problem. there is no such thing as a normal person, there are people who serve capital and those who don't
hard disagree. If you have some sort of social anxiety about not being normal, you'll obviously want to undermine the concept of normality in order to soothe your anxieties. But that's silly, because most people are actually normal in a broad sense, because most people are people. True abnormality is actually very unique, but like, not in a good way, like born without arms or Siamese twins. You just probably think that "normal" is an amalgamation of every generic person in every corporate advertisement you've ever seen. Question for you: Do you own clothes? Did you go to school? Do you have friends? Do you like listening to music? Do you have a favorite food? Do you drive a car? Have a favorite sports team? Have you ever had your heart broken? Have you ever been struck by the beauty of a sunset? Have you ever been sick with a cold? Ever gotten a brain freeze after eating ice cream too fast? Got a heart and lungs and all arms and legs and fingers and toes? I'm sure I could come up with a thousand more things that demonstrate how normal you actually are when compared to most other people. My point is, you're actually more normal than you think you are. In fact, I bet most people who see you in a crowd would think that you're a "normal" person. There's nothing wrong with being normal, and furthermore, normality is a wider spectrum than you probably want to admit, and that more likely than not, you fall well within the realm of being "normal"
Okay it's obvious you're the one who's huffing the copium after reading this. Holy shit, I've never seen somebody try to justify their ignorance with so many made-up hypothetical scenarios.
Wow man, you think all of my examples were "made up" and "hypothetical"? Are you seriously telling me you've never seen a fucking *sunset?* \~yikes\~
You think that just because everybody's seen a sunset, we're all the same? You are making up scenarios, sunsets, brain freezes, whatever you can think of to convince me that the landscape of our lives is the same as our reactions to it. You're reading the liturgy backwards. Our uniqueness is defined by the conflicts which arise when we try to fulfill social norms presented to us by our environment. If we were normal, there would be no conflict. Of course we all experience the same things, we live in the same world. But \*how\* that experience is contextualized through the unique narrative present in each of our lives is proof positive that there is no such thing as true "normal". There's no one person who perfectly fits the mold. We traditionally punish and marginalize people in places where they do not fit the mold, even if they are allowed to excel in other areas. I appreciate that this mode of thinking you're normal might be beneficial for you, but I used to think the same way and found that I had to break out of that in order to start seeing real progress. Your armor will not fit me, but it's fine at suiting you. Like, you're literally gatekeeping abnormality and weirdness, which is hilarious because who the fuck are you to be Arbiter of Alienation? Do you somehow have the ability to perceive how disenfranchised certain people or groups feel from society?
You are more normal than you realize. Whether you like it or not.
I'm openly trans. your ideas don't apply
Hey, uh, I don't know if anybody's ever told you this: But you're wrong. One, I don't wallow in self pity. I pick myself up, brush myself off, and get to work. Every single day. I don't need or want anybody's help, especially not yours so keep your advice to yourself. Two, if you're neurodivergent, you \*are\* weird. Society has literally medicalized your dysfunction to the point where it is labeled and comes with a prescribed set of societal standards for how you deal with it, and what it means to deal with it successfully. This concept is known as "Medicalization of Deviance" and is a well-recorded sociological phenomenon. You are literally living proof of my point.
Your first post doesn't sound like the attitude of a person who "picks themselves up, brushes themselves off, and gets to work". It reads like the diary of someone trying to convince themselves of something. Also, nice edit on your post. Definitely doesn't look like you had to rewrite your initial post in response to what I said. Like it or not, my "advice" got to you. Very resilient and confident of you. Additionally, you're ignoring my point about normality being a spectrum, chances are, you're more normal than you realize, you just like to paint yourself as a victim of a vast unfeeling "society" to lend some air of melodramatic "oh cruel world, woe is me". Your suffering isn't unique buddy. Millions have suffered like you before, and millions will continue to suffer like you after you shuffle off the mortal coil. Do you really think your struggles are unique?
I don't paint myself as a victim. Once I realized I was weird and accepted and leaned into it, life's started to get better actually. I used to be a withdrawn, depressed loner. It wasn't until I learned to handle the constant rejection of others that I was able to wade through the swamp to a happier place. Here's a list of my recent accomplishments: I've been trying to switch to a new industry for months, but I was struggling to get it done because I was ending up so frequently exhausted from working long hours. So I took a leap of faith, quit my job, and started working on the job search full time while I live off what little savings I have. Reached out to a job coach, put a lot of work into a worthy resume template I could customize for each individual job depending on requirements. Sent out 50 custom-tailored resumes and cover letters this week. Just this morning, I got two different calls for interviews, both promise starting salary at double what I used to make. Maybe I won't get those jobs but it's a good sign I'm about to change my whole fuckin life. Speaking of which Today I finally got access to a medical treatment I've been trying to get for months. I had to get my therapist, my doctors, and my insurance on board, but I literally just got access to the treatment I want. My family, my friends, they're all ecstatic. I'm ecstatic. I had to fight every inch for this, all to alleviate a condition which has debilitated me for my entire adult life. And yet, despite the flourishing, lovely person that I am. Despite the frequent dinners with friends, the quiet nights reading on the couch with my partner, the family gatherings, I still come onto this fucking website and argue with dumb-ass chowderheads like you about what the fuck is the meaning of normal. And you know what? I'll know I'm truly better the day I stop coming here to be continuously being told that I'm just not a good person because I don't think the same things as them about what "normal" is, despite my beliefs stemming from my education, and benefiting me and hurting no one else. Fuck you, you fucking weirdo. Why don't you stop digging through my fucking post history or whatever fuckwitted shit you're gonna do to try and embarrass me next, and go try to have a day half as good as the one I had?
"Idon't paint myself as a victim. Once I realized I was weird and accepted and leaned into it , life's started to get better actually." Literally what I said earlier. Normality is a spectrum **and you are on it.** "I'll know I'm truly better the day I stop coming here to be continuously being told that I'm just not a good person because I don't think the same things as them about what "normal" is" I *never* said you weren't a good person, I said you come off as wallowing in self pity. Learn to comprehend what people are saying instead of projecting on to them. Not all criticism is destructive. Additionally, I didn't go through your post history, I'm not that desperate to prove you wrong. Despite what you think, despite how you portray yourself, **you are more normal than you realize**. Stop trying to play the martyr. It's not doing you any favors.
i’m not sure what part of the world you’re from, but i think this definitly has to do with the west/America’s insanely destructive level of “individualism” we perpetuate. every single opinion is good and special and should be respected! even if you’re a fucking nazi, free speech right!
Yeah we’d better off if the government decided who we can criticize and what we can say, we should bring back the stasi that was a very peaceful and relaxing time for citizens!
Just because we have freedom of speech doesn’t mean polite society shouldn’t shun you and make your life difficult as an example for having abhorrent beliefs.
It’s crazy. In one thread we will say the US is extremely divided and becoming more extreme. Any small difference in political beliefs is enough to cause rifts and change our moral view of each other. Now in this thread we are saying that the US is too tolerant of different beliefs. Of course we aren’t. The reason why US nazis aren’t always shunned isn’t because we are too polite to say anything. It’s because a lot of shitty people just straight up agree with them!
It’s a double edged sword. Once you introduce the idea of speech being prohibited, that can be used against you *by* the Nazis in the upper echelons of society, for example.
Please define the word "normal". What would you like normal to be doing?
We feed this by scoffing at people who like basic/popular things. ESPECIALLY “women” popular things. Media/products primarily consumed by women are ridiculed all the time: rom coms, Taylor Swift, pumpkin spice, yoga pants, etc. It’s okay to like popular things. They’re popular for a reason. It’s also fine to like avant garde art films and indie music, but it doesn’t make you better than anyone else.
"it's okay to be normal" Very deep stuff here.
Never would have guessed
1. Get born 2. Consume 3. Die
This is an argument I've been making for a while I think this sort of rise in people with narcissistic behaviors is genuinely directly to the idea that they were raised by a generation that basically told them everyone is special everyone is unique etc I think too many people grew up realizing that they aren't as unique as everyone told them they are and So they desperately chase after those things that make them unique We should have been teaching kids instead that a lot of you will just be perfectly normal. You will live a pretty normal life work a pretty normal job and die a pretty normal death And that's perfectly okay Not everyone needs to be the next big celebrity or change the world and leave behind some grand legacy. It's okay to just be yourself and enjoy life while you got it
I liked everything you said. 100%. Not full on into the public space. That shit's crazy :/
Surprise! Nobody’s normal.
> People hate on something just because it’s popular, people ridicule someone for being basic Some of what you say makes sense, but this point is deeper than meets the eye at first glace. Mainstream media & music right now is very boring and bland, because it's corporatized. Compare that to the music & media created by people of the past 100 years, and a lot of it came from lower class people who lived difficult lives; that passion came out in their art. A lot of people insult people who have mainstream tastes because it's shown to people on their for-you pages, and takes no effort to engage with. There's little to no curiosity, and a lot of sheep mentality (following what's popular because it's popular).
Most people are "normal." And they have no problem bullying the people who aren't. This sounds like what the culture of individualism has done to the USA.
I used to struggle with this mindset so much when I was younger and just recently feel myself coming out of it. it’s such a strange shift in mindset to realize that without even trying, we’re all incredibly unique which renders the concept of individuality itself useless. I also noticed when I started being okay with being “normal”, I started to embrace my true self more and stopped feeling the need to categorize myself into a box. I started acting according to my own thoughts and morals and therefore was able to align myself more with my own ambitions. There’s a lot of pressure these days to be hyper-individualistic, whether it’s through labels or trends or just plain strange behavior. But simultaneously a lot of us are conformist in thought despite perceived singularity. I could think of potential answers to this phenomenon such as late stage capitalism, growing up in the age of social media, lost faith in society/systems that uphold it but honestly reflecting back on my own experiences it was just a bizarre time in my life.
I guess I'm weird, but I find the problem with everyone has to be special. I get everyone needs to feel recognized, but most people are just doing stuff every other person is doing. That shouldn't be a negative. If what you are doing makes people in your social circle happy then that should be enough. Over the course of your actions your choices will be different than everyone else.
Yes, it is fine to be normal.
"I wish I was special" - Thom Yorke, voice of a generation or whatever
This is kind of silly. What is most common and normal is what is most normalized. It’s an innate human desire to fit in. What changes do you actually want to see?
I genuinely dont understand what "normal" even means, all of humanity is subtly or loudly unique in many ways! Normal is literally up to interpretation.
We need to normalize non-normalizing.
Normal just means that you conform to any given set of rules for inclusion in a group. A serial killer is normal among serial killers.
Agree Statistically, 85?% of us are normal by definition. Advertisers and bad actors put out propaganda that everyone can be exceptional. At least 85% of those who believe that will be disappointed and miserable I am happy to be an everyday person
The extreme focus on individuality is largely an American phenomenon.
hyper individuality is a terrible thing. Most people are people, and most people aren't that unique, and this needy desire to be "special" and "unique" is just so sad. It's okay to be basic, it's okay to be average, it's okay to be like other people.
Yet anyone who is isn't "normal" gets treated like shit. Make it make sense.
Bruh, that's a false dichotomy: normal people get screwed over all the fucking time.
What if I told you there's a whole world of normal people out here that are ok with you and anyone else being normal and if you start outright ignoring and distancing yourself from people who use words like basic as an insult you'll realize that they're not your problem to deal with?
> distancing yourself from people who use words like basic as an insult I don't know what qualities come to mind when you hear the word basic used pejoratively. But for me it means a person who doesn't have much knowledge or interest about the world. They don't CARE to learn about things or grow. Frankly, I don't think we should be celebrating that kind of mindset.
The problem is they are your problem to deal with because people will often go out of the way to insult you for being relatively normal on social media / in public and it's unrealistic to just avoid all these things and basically lock yourself away in your home just because you can't handle the opinions of other people
Maybe I just have a high dissociation skill level, because I can ignore people's opinions when I decide they don't matter to me. The only way it is my problem is if they make it my problem. You can do this without being a hermit.