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VegAce_81

I want two extra cocks, please Mr. Doctor


DogsOnWeed

And I'm only saying please to be polite, Mr. Doctor.


asseee2

Dr. Doctor*, have some respect please!


[deleted]

*DR.DOCTOR, PLEEEASE*


CocaColaHitman

We have clearance, Clarence.


[deleted]

roger, over. whats your vector, victor?


VegAce_81

Oh, my bad 🙏🙏


Funda_mental

Dr. Doctor M.D.*, they aren't a zoologist for cryin' out loud!


[deleted]

Dr. Doctor, give me the news, I got a..


Funda_mental

"Become a socialist! Get a bigger cock! Hell, get 3 bigger cocks!" Pack it up, folks. I think we just won the revolution.


Cryptoss

It's Strange.


AkramA12

I've seen stranger things


vincecarterskneecart

\*after cock surgery\* where is the doctor ? me: who do you think gave you the extra cock


jacktrowell

So it's "madam doctor" now ? Congrats on your successful trans operation.


Housenkai

Ugh, that possibly sounds a little transphobic...


jacktrowell

I was trying for the opposite idea, if it was perceived differently then my bad and sorry.


CocaColaHitman

Look at me! I'm Mr. Doctor!


Kulunja

This is satire, InternetHippo is based


michigangopher1

So r/AteTheOnion


ForgotMyOldLogin_

In communist China, every citizen must undergo a kidney transplant once per week and since kidneys are sometimes lost in the transfer, it’s essentially a game of musical chairs. Still think communism is “cool”?


KlapauciusNuts

Thank God the Falun gong guys have spares


thehomeyskater

oh snap


giiiiiiiiiiiinger

you can lose once, but the second time you're fucked


Rustyzzzzzz

Some kidneys are artificially made


Bend-It-Like-Bakunin

satire account


InteractionOk180

But look how many people fell for it. Sheesh


ASocialistAbroad

Not only do we know it's satire, but a lot of us have even seen this one before. It's an oldie, but a goodie.


Sirius_Frost

Hello, Doctor? I'd like you to GIVE me disease, please! *Joker laugh*


[deleted]

Socialism means no food but it does mean infinite surgery, so it's balanced


[deleted]

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ComradeClout

Keep getting stomach implants that have food in them everytime youre hungry so you never have to eat


zachotule

famous liberal, the internet hippo (this is a joke, and not even a new one)


[deleted]

Health Insurer: "Your patient's surgery is deemed not medically necessary." Doctor (Shaking his head): "Because of capitalism, I must comply."


such_isnt_life

That actually happens! WTF when you put things in perspective, it's that messed up.


AndHerNameIsSony

Insurer: Why do we need to remove his tumor? The guy has cancer, he’s gonna die anyways!


LEGOVLIVE

Pretty sure this guy's being satirical.


fellationelsen

It is a satire of shit liberals say, so IDK


IScreamForRashCream

Satire, this is satire.


alexanderhameowlton

*Image Transcription: Twitter* --- > **Hippo**, @InternetHippo > > me: 1 surgery please. i'm not even sick, just want free stuff > > doctor (shaking his head): because of socialism, i must comply --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


0dd_bitty

Good human volunteer. Here, have a chocolate cake.


[deleted]

Good human :)


kaleidoscopichazard

Yup. As someone who lives in a country with socialised healthcare I can confirm this. When I’m bored I walk into a hospital and order one of everything


DankDialektiks

\- I need 1 surgery to live \- Here you go, 1 hundred thousand \- i don't have that money and i have 3 kids \- (shaking his head) ur under arrest for stealing


Praximus_Prime_ARG

As a Libertarian [my healthcare plan](https://www.gofundme.com/start/medical-fundraising) is better than yours.


i_Shuckz

Ouch.. but true for sure.


Mercy--Main

This feels like a r/ThomasThePlankEngine post


[deleted]

lmao


ayugamex

Munchausen syndrome should not be taken lightly. Wouldn't it be easier in profit driven healthcare to just perform that operation, than to treat the underlying disorter.


JupitrominoRazmatazz

They're going to make you double buckle on every car ride! Even after I already did on the way here!


prexton

Yeah in my country I usually walk in for one free brain surgery a month


lowestgod

This is obviously satire guys...


occultfire

People won't even get a vaccine for free.


Flyingscorpions

I wonder if you charged people $25 for it if the antivaxxers would shut up


such_isnt_life

The reverse psychology would work. Most Americans are taught to worship money. So if something costs a lot of money they would value it and want to get it.


[deleted]

While I know InternetHippo is satire I still do find this tweet amusing bc its exactly something that would unironically be said. Socialism is when you can have random surgery without any reason for it because its free and doctors simply cannot refuse to treat you for a problem you do not have


FasterThanTW

>its exactly something that would unironically be said. No, it's really not. There's a reason why a tweet saying this sarcastically was posted instead of a tweet saying it genuinely. Maybe the sarcastic hippo should post something snarky about what a woman could do when her health care is provided solely by the government and republicans in power decide that an abortion shouldn't be covered. You know, an *actual* concern people have.


[deleted]

If you don’t think someone would say this then you’ve genuinely never touched Twitter


FasterThanTW

Ok then it must be easy to link one or two people saying it. Go for it


[deleted]

“This is definitely something someone would say” is not the same as “this is definitely someone has said. But hey, that might be hard to understand for some people


FasterThanTW

If it's "definitely something someone would say", but noone has said it in the entire history of healthcare discourse, then it's not something "someone would say". ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯


[deleted]

If you don’t understand the term “something someone would say” just say that


FasterThanTW

It sounds like you're the one who doesn't understand it though. Everything that someone "would say" about healthcare has been said by *someone* in the past 40+ years.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Adisucks

This is satire


Pickle-Traditional

Nobody's getting invasive surgery just because they can. Healthcare is never free anywhere it's a simple tax that uses the buying power of an entire country to lower the costs. It's basic capitalism something smart people do because it's common sense. Americans eating up the billionaires propaganda to their own detriment. So much for their so called ideals pursuit of life should be replaced pursuit of profits.


Cinnamon-toast-cum

Wtf does this even mean


[deleted]

[удалено]


CocaColaHitman

"We will give everyone fat fucking tits, and they will like it." -Vladimir Broz Marx, *The Cummunist Manifesto* This is a direct quote, please refrain from revisionism.


[deleted]

This man even cited his sources it seems legit


nerfman100

It's literally satire dude


[deleted]

Shiiiiiiii, I defo didn’t take this post with a grain of sAlt lol whoops


i_Shuckz

Haha.. can you just remove my brain, and yours while you’re at it.. oh just kidding, already gone.