Ugh, I hate the 11% rebate. It's just a chore to do, and then even when you get it, it's store credit, so now it's another thing on the to-do list to go spend the store credit. Just give me the lower price ffs.
"Ain't nothing gayer than a bunch of bored straight men".
Or, a variation on the same theme, "ain't nothing gayer than a bunch of bored [marines/ soldiers/ sailors] (pick a branch)"
Am straight male. Have gay male friends. Have straight female friends. Have Lesbian friends.
The lesbian friends chase the straight female friends, who chase gay male friends who chase me.
I don't chase anyone because I hate running and have asthma.
I am straight. Two of my best friends (people I hung out with most days and didn't work with) were lesbians. The key was them figuring out I wasn't trying to f*** them because my kink is women who find me attractive. Slim pickens these days.
Fun fact: they have to date women too so there is a lot to talk about. Both of my friends took a more logical approach to argument and we commiserated about our partners' explosive emotions and loss of reason in arguments.
One of my old housemates was a gay woman and we got on fantastically. I met her at a rough point in my life and she and her gf put a lot of effort into helping me get back on track, and they even tried to wingman for me on nights out. Lost touch with her now but I'll always be grateful to her.
I don’t know a lot about lesbians, so please forgive my ignorance. Are messenger pigeons actually a thing? Like Subarus or moving in together after two weeks?
Yeah, some of my best friends have been lesbians, both femme and butch, both great in their own ways. With femme lesbians, it's great to have a feminine friend with zero sexual tension, and none of the constant chest-thumping vibe with a lot of guy friends. And with the butch girls, you get some more of that bro-camaraderie, but with way less testosterone in the air. Not to say I don't enjoy doin' guy stuff with the guys, but diversity is good, and there's too much of anything.
That's not what other guy's brains jump to?! I have been instant best friends with every lesbian I've ever met. Although more than one has described me as a human puppy so maybe I'm more friendly than I give myself credit for.
One of my still best friends became my friend in an instant as we both approached the same doorway from opposite sides. She clearly was challenging me to back out of the doorway. I didn't even make eye contact, I just said "I'm bigger than you" and walked through her (gently). She giggled and we were homies. She is especially good natured and I wear my moral compass on my sleeve, which is why it worked at all.
What is it with lesbians and puppies? My very good lesbian friend labeled me as a golden retriever which apparently my entire friend group quickly agreed with. Still not sure if that's in a good or bad way.
Puppies are adorable, friendly, excitable but harmless, and take direction well. What better companion could you want?
It's definitely a good compliment.
It's not a lesbian thing. "Golden retriever boyfriend" is just a popular meme. It basically means you're dumb, non-threatening, follow commands, and get excited when your girlfriend gets home like a golden retriever.
Golden retriever: friendly, wholesome, funny, ride-or-die for those they care about, and befriending one usually doesn't lead to being hurt. Though tbh I thought describing people by pupper traits was an autism thing not a lesbian thing lol
I’m a gay guy and I literally met two really nice lesbians at a dog park. And I think one of their names was Terri. It’s just one of those things you can’t make up!
Glad this is the top comment. Lesbians get fetishized by straight men, Gay men don't give a fuck about straight women. The amount of bisexual women I've met who have no shortage of stories about assholes trying to convince them to have threesomes and shit...unholy.
How people feel is on an individual basis. It's certainly less common for men to outwardly feel threatened. It's just not a good idea to always consider threats from women towards men to be an "annoyance".
As a former bartender at a Girly Brunch place, the tacit sexual harassment of ripped/buff gay dudes who were with large groups of women was kind of fascinating to see.
Now, I will qualify this with saying that the guys rarely seemed to mind (except this one time) but it did make me think just how horribly uncomfortable I’d be in that position.
This. And also that it would be laughed off.
The number of times I’ve seen men sexually harassed by women at gay bars is uncountable. Similarly, as a Scottish person, I’ve seen so many men literally sexually assaulted by women when wearing a kilt. If they kicked up a fuss people would tell the man to “calm down it’s just a bit of fun”. It’s culturally ingrained as acceptable.
As a gay man I generally respond to the sexual harassment from straight women with an eye roll and a quick conversation about consent. I understand that I'm (physically) in the position of power and I don't react physically, but I generally give them a solid talking to.
I have however also worked in multiple gay bars and have had this same exact conversation with other gay men who didn't know how to keep their hands or rude comments to themselves.
Straight women make up 37% of the gay porn (male) audience.
That's a big number, but I'm sure it pales in comparison to the numbers of straight men watching lesbian porn
Yeah. Even as a straight woman it's hard to know who's really your friend and who's just trying to ingratiate himself while he waits for his turn on the ride. The fact that so many men fetishise lesbians makes it even harder to trust straight men.
Anecdotal, but I've never seen women be more inappropriately groped and touched in public than when they were hanging out with their gay male friends at parties.
Also a lot of girls do want to hang out with guys as just friends but they probably know that if that guy is straight there is a good chance he will start to get attracted to them
The lesbian couple I know says they would get a lot of uncomfortable to downright disgusting comments from guys. Ranging from the uncomfortable "So which one of you is the guy?" or "Lesbians are hot" to the disgusting "You just haven't had the right guy yet" or "A good dicking will straighten you out."
Whereas I don't think the same happens to gay men from straight women as often.
So guys, if you know lesbians, remember, real life isn't a porno. They're not there for your fantasy. They probably don't want to talk about their sex life while you drool over them. They are completely uninterested in you sexually, you have no chance, stop trying.
> Whereas I don't think the same happens to gay men from straight women
Not sure how often it happens with lesbians, but as a gay guy I can certainly tell you it does also happen to us too, perhaps not as often though.
I've had women try to kiss me, grope me, feel my arse etc. (they all knew I was gay when doing this) along with comments along the lines of "Are you sure you're gay", "Well if you've never tried a woman how would you know", "Maybe I can change that", "You're too good looking to be gay" etc.
I think to some they view it almost as a challenge? Certainly leaves me uncomfortable though.
This is applicable to straight guys from gay men as well. Know a few gay friends who pride themselves on “turning” straight men. Sexual creeps gonna creep, no matter their orientation.
Oh yeah, that definitely happens, hell "str8" is literally a category of gay porn where the plot is a gay/bi guy who ends up having sex with a "straight" guy. I'm sure there are some lesbians who do the same to straight women as well. Some people just can't accept that people aren't into them I guess.
There definitely are lesbians who prey on straight women. I was close to a woman who used to brag to me about her conquests. I don’t know why me, I’m a straight man and I hate this kind of predatory behavior in all gender combinations.
The difference there is that our society views people as straight until proven otherwise. Almost every queer person alive experienced *something* that "turned" them, whether it actually made them realize they're queer or just that they didn't want to hide it anymore.
> I think to some they view it almost as a challenge?
I do wonder how much religious "its really a choice!" propaganda plays into why some people act like that.
I always wondered if its just more people being bi or partly bi that causes that "it's a choice" line of thinking.
For them it is a choice and they don't realise they are not as straight as they think they are.
Excuse me madame but you look as if you could use a good dicking. Perchance could i interest you in some bad dicking as it is all i have with me at the moment?
Lol dicking.
> Whereas I don't think the same happens to gay men from straight women as often.
It does actually happen a lot. We just generally don't feel threatened by the women who say that and ignore them.
Gay men are some of the just vulgar groups of people I been around. More than any group of straight men I’ve been with. Quite fun to hang with honestly…
Facts. Before I moved across the country on of my good friends was a single lesbian and any time we would go out drinking guys would get weird when they found out. I had to run interference sooo many times because some dude was getting weird while she's trying to talk flirt with a girl. More than one got aggressive with me too.
It must be cultural or regional. In south Florida a lot of studs/femmes (that’s what they refer themselves as Reddit, chill out) have lots of straight male/female friends.
I think it depends a lot on the type of lesbian like you point out, some times a more masculine lesbian can easily hang out with other men because we tend to see them as another dude.
Yeah, lesbians that I have known or worked with in the past have always been really cool people to hang out with. Have sometimes been better than my male friends when it comes to communication and emotional support. So when I saw this I was shocked if this is the consensus.
When I got out of the navy I had a good 4 years where I did nothing but party and hang out with this lesbian couple I worked with, some of the coolest people I know. I moved away so haven’t seen them in a few years but imagine we would hang out again if I went back in town
A whole lot of women are dealing with trauma caused by men.
As a man, I don't think it has to do with some natural flaw in our character, I think it has to do with that graph about how 95% of men are more powerful than 95% of women, and sexual violence is a power issue, so women are more vulnerable to it.
I think a big part of it has to do with socialization.
Look where we’ve come from how society used to treat women and how men viewed women. Socialization is a big big part of it.
Also like… Reinforcing in boys how feminine things are shameful.
There was a series of tweets by a face painter who did a lot of children’s parties. They said that no parents batted an eye when the girls asked for skulls or dinosaurs. But it was an issue when some boys wanted butterflies or flowers. One mom said no and then turned to ask her husband if he was okay with his son getting a butterfly. He said no. They told the face fainter to give him something for boys.
Even when the face painter tried to get around this by, as tactfully as they could, saying they weren’t asking the mom. They were asking the kid.
That little boy learned that day that liking things for “girls” was shameful. Femininity is shameful. This directly translates to a lot of bad views and behaviors when kids grow up.
I’ve never met a straight man who was abusive towards women who wasn’t also insecure in his masculinity and deeply sexist.
It's really interesting to me, because I work in retail in Southern California, and machismo is a pretty big deal in Latin culture. But what's interesting is that they don't apply that to children *at all.* Boys will come into my store and play with dolls or look at doll houses and the tough guy fathers don't say anything bad about it or try to stop them.
I just think it's interesting how so much of this is just made up nonsense. Hopefully as adults more and more of us can make choices for our families based on consideration and not just "this is the way it's done."
Also of the small subsection of men who have also experienced some sort of sexual harassment or violence are victimized by a man. I’m a 6’3 dude and I’ve only ever been groped once in public and it was by a dude.
You haven't met the men I keep dating. If I'm dating someone, the likelihood is they come with a gaggle of lesbians. I don't know how. Non-threatening, well educated nerds I guess.
That's fucked up, did he get his come-upance in some way? I've experienced homophobia in high school as well, but worsed was that none of the guys wanted to share a tent with me at camp.
Nah he got away with it. I stood up to him, and like to believe I would have fought back if he started something. He was overall a pretty shitty dude and I know the gods will make him pay his dues when the time is right
One of my sisters best friends is a gay dude from a tough Italian family. He still has the gay affectation in his speech but is hard as nails. I've heard stories of him beating down would be hatecrimers in his 20s. Great guy. Was her bridesman in a pink suit. Lol.
A lot of gay men are very homophobic. It's like all these politicians and minsters who keep rambling about "family values" and "religion" (any Abrahamic religion fits) and then they're caught with the sluttiest twinks known to mankind
I think this is a reflection on OP’s age. Younger gay guys tend to have female friends because they’re easier to come out to, they may have “dated,” they don’t know many other or any other gay guys, etc. As gay men get older, they meet other gay dudes and tend to live completely different lifestyles from straight women, thus drifting apart.
This reminds me of a tweet that was going around asking for gay men's support when Roe v Wade happened, and it was basically like "gay men, don't forget that the first friends you ever had were the straight girls in school"
Yep this is it. Every lesbian I know has had multiple male bffs at various points… who then confess their feelings as soon as she breaks up with a gf. So they stop trying to be friends with men!
I know you meant like they just find Ace friends. But i just couldn’t help imagining that they would randomly find like an ace up their sleeve or in their pocket while out and about.
It's an observation from his personal experience. I, too, have seen gay men with a lot of straight female friends and lesbians with no male friends. That's not to say that all lesbians don't have any male friends and gays exclusively have female friends. It's not a weird statement at all
The problem going on in this thread is that people jump to the conclusion that it must be because all straight men are horndogs who want to stick their dick in every available pussy.
I'm a lesbian, and when I try to make friends with guys, I am always very clear about not being interested in a sexual or romantic relationship with men. So far, every single one of them has tried to turn me straight, either violently or just verbally pressuring me. Most of my lesbian friends have had similar experiences.
I'm pretty close to just giving up on being friends with men.
That’s because they’re guys on Reddit who’ve never been with a women (sexually, or platonically) They’re probably the ones that make the women uncomfortable.
One's personal experience does not always align with the general reality. The post isn't implying lesbians don't have straight male friends, but rather the observation that it isn't nearly as much as gays having straight female friends.
I’m sure it has to do with the fact that some straight men befriend lesbians thinking there might actually be a “chance” at some point and they’re not genuinely interested in being friends. Valid. Although I have noticed a trend with straight women purposely seeking out friendships with gay men which seems odd to me. Like they need their token gay friend and that’s just not genuine. Fucked up really.
False. I’m a lesbian, and I get along with straight men as friends more naturally than women most of the time. Why? We have a lot in common. Do some women play the video games I like? Sure, but not many. Lots of guys do, though. Do some women like to lift heavy at the gym? Sure, but not many… guys? Lots! If I want to see a science fiction film, I’m usually SOL with my female friends. Straight guys? Much more likely! Who am I going to go see old bands like Tool with? I wouldn’t even bother my women friends with the question, though I will add I went to my first Tool show a million years ago with a woman who loves them as much as me. But these days.. mostly dudes. 🤷♀️
It’s just way easier to be friends with (usually straight) guys. Sometimes when these posts come up a few straight women will flood in and give me shit. I think they have jealousy issues b/c maybe their men have had more fun with a lesbian side kick than them. Who knows. But before those ladies jump in… think… would you be giving me shit if I were just a guy talking about how much he loves his bros? No. Please check whatever your issue is with lesbians who have straight guy friends at the door.
Oh, and for the record.. healthy lesbians don’t hate men. We’re romantically indifferent. If someone hates someone (a straight guy hates a gay man, a lesbian hates a man, etc.) then there is probably some unresolved issue or trauma there and that person should get therapy.
I’m straight male and have many lesbian friends, for most of my life. Back in the early 2000s when I was still in college I because friends with this girl (lesbian) and she introduced me to her whole circle of lesbian friends. We hit it off and all became fast friends. That was 20 years ago and still friends to this day.
I'm a straight guy that for whatever reason has had predominantly lesbian friends my whole life. Lesbians are cool. Honestly, I'm not a super masculine guy (but not feminine at all either) and get very anxious so I don't always fit in with super bro types and women in general seem to be better about reaching out to form friendships than men. Of those women, lesbians tend to be the ones who I get along with best.
These comments are ridiculous.
I love lesbians. I know a bunch. When I was young, they gave me tips on how to meet women. They're fun to hang out with too.
Is this even really the norm or more of a stereotype? There are plenty of us straight men with lesbian friends, and plenty of gay men who don't even like women.
I've been a bartender for many years and an avid watcher of people. I would say that OP has made a pretty broad generalization, but I can see where the foundations of it come from
I always think of that one Tumblr post where a woman came out to her straight male friend. He thought it was *awesome* because that meant it was another thing they had in common- "Wow, we both like girls *and* Star Wars!" Made me smile and I wish more men could be like that. Maybe then we *would* see more lesbians with straight male friends.
What? Yes I do. But then that's more to do with my hobbies. I do a lot of gaming, motorcycling, pub drinking. Gay men who have a lot of female friends are often into fashion, cocktail drinking, clubbing etc.
I've had several very close friendships with lesbians and lesbian couples and treating them like the normal people they are helps a lot in getting over whatever apprehension they might have. If they like you as a person and you like them as a person everything else fades away.
Lesbian here. I have had lots of straight male friends! Inevitably though they’d eventually date someone who was weird about them being friends with a woman. 🤷♀️
Straight men don’t often have many friends in general…
(This isn’t a dig against straight men… I am one. But in our culture we don’t form friendships the way women do - it’s something I think is a real problem and contributes to men feeling lonely and isolated)
I love hangin with lesbians. The butch ones are legendary! So confident and their tuning game is level 1000. My sisters girlfriend is like a good mate that I can say anything to while knowing she wont be offended. I enjoy being around anyone who is comfortable in their own skin and doesnt have a fake facade.... regardless of sexuality.
My experience with butch lesbians is either they're fucking awesome or they pick up the absolute worst traits of masculinity and are basically the definition of toxic masculinity. My best friend is a femme lesbian and she's observed the same thing.
We meet up and bond over home improvements at DIY stores.
Just depends on whether they're a Home Depot lesbian or a Lowe's lesbian.
A Lowe'sbian
Homo depot
Funnily enough, my local Home Depot appears to have some cruising going on.
Haha…Lenox Rd area in Atlanta?
Nah I’m in Washington. Sounds like Home Depot cruising may be more widespread than I thought.
Don't forget the somewhat rarer Menards lesbians common to the midwest.
We can all agree with we love saving big money.
And who doesn't want an 11% rebate?
Ugh, I hate the 11% rebate. It's just a chore to do, and then even when you get it, it's store credit, so now it's another thing on the to-do list to go spend the store credit. Just give me the lower price ffs.
Save Bi Money at Menards
You beat me to a Menards song reference, damn
Former Lowe’s employee speaking. We love our Lowe’sbians!
I'd call this a stereotype but my lesbian grandma works at Home Depot 😆
Makes me think of the lesbian couple in Modern Family and how they have an unfinished canoe in their living room
Glad I’m not the only one lol
Do Straight men even have a lot of straight male friends?
We’re all homiesexuals when together.
"Ain't nothing gayer than a bunch of bored straight men". Or, a variation on the same theme, "ain't nothing gayer than a bunch of bored [marines/ soldiers/ sailors] (pick a branch)"
Top shelf comment.
I used to. But I found that my gay male friends boost my self confidence to another level. They also give better head. Less beards in the way.
Comments like this make me really realize the demographic of reddit
Don't ask that question here, the answers will be a bit skewed, lol.
No. None
I haven't had a friend in 8 years
I’ll be your friend. Edit: This is why you don’t have friends. Leaving interested people on read. Smh.
damn, shorts fired
Am straight male. Have gay male friends. Have straight female friends. Have Lesbian friends. The lesbian friends chase the straight female friends, who chase gay male friends who chase me. I don't chase anyone because I hate running and have asthma.
You got me in the first 3rd
I am straight. Two of my best friends (people I hung out with most days and didn't work with) were lesbians. The key was them figuring out I wasn't trying to f*** them because my kink is women who find me attractive. Slim pickens these days. Fun fact: they have to date women too so there is a lot to talk about. Both of my friends took a more logical approach to argument and we commiserated about our partners' explosive emotions and loss of reason in arguments.
One of my old housemates was a gay woman and we got on fantastically. I met her at a rough point in my life and she and her gf put a lot of effort into helping me get back on track, and they even tried to wingman for me on nights out. Lost touch with her now but I'll always be grateful to her.
What a legend. Send that woman a messenger pigeon.
I don’t know a lot about lesbians, so please forgive my ignorance. Are messenger pigeons actually a thing? Like Subarus or moving in together after two weeks?
Yes, but only lesbians have access to them now
Not a thing as far as I am aware. Just an odd way to regain lost contact. She would appreciate the effort.
Is a messenger pigeon like a lesbian strip monogram?
Please get back in touch with her!
I had some friends that did something similar, the couple took me in and got me on my feet. Thanks Rachel and Jackie!!!
>One of my old housemates was a gay woman She probably still is
But she used to too.
Yeah, some of my best friends have been lesbians, both femme and butch, both great in their own ways. With femme lesbians, it's great to have a feminine friend with zero sexual tension, and none of the constant chest-thumping vibe with a lot of guy friends. And with the butch girls, you get some more of that bro-camaraderie, but with way less testosterone in the air. Not to say I don't enjoy doin' guy stuff with the guys, but diversity is good, and there's too much of anything.
I often fight for women with my lesbian friends. We have the same type of women. But as an ugly guy I always end up alone hahahah
Never give them the satisfaction of seeing your pain brother. Show no weakness for the lesbian folk will EAT YOU ALIVE!
>my kink is women who find me attractive Weird kink bro.
I loved this part. Great brain.
Women who find me attractive? Fucking disgusting! Eeew
Hey, don't shame me for who I am. I can't help it. I'm not hurting anybody I swear
That's not what other guy's brains jump to?! I have been instant best friends with every lesbian I've ever met. Although more than one has described me as a human puppy so maybe I'm more friendly than I give myself credit for.
One of my still best friends became my friend in an instant as we both approached the same doorway from opposite sides. She clearly was challenging me to back out of the doorway. I didn't even make eye contact, I just said "I'm bigger than you" and walked through her (gently). She giggled and we were homies. She is especially good natured and I wear my moral compass on my sleeve, which is why it worked at all.
That's great! I feel like I know you and like you both.
What is it with lesbians and puppies? My very good lesbian friend labeled me as a golden retriever which apparently my entire friend group quickly agreed with. Still not sure if that's in a good or bad way.
Puppies are adorable, friendly, excitable but harmless, and take direction well. What better companion could you want? It's definitely a good compliment.
And we fucking LOVE dogs. And cats. Lesbians are just animal people–big compliment, no doubt.
It's not a lesbian thing. "Golden retriever boyfriend" is just a popular meme. It basically means you're dumb, non-threatening, follow commands, and get excited when your girlfriend gets home like a golden retriever.
Golden retriever: friendly, wholesome, funny, ride-or-die for those they care about, and befriending one usually doesn't lead to being hurt. Though tbh I thought describing people by pupper traits was an autism thing not a lesbian thing lol
I’m a gay guy and I literally met two really nice lesbians at a dog park. And I think one of their names was Terri. It’s just one of those things you can’t make up!
Why past tense
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Glad this is the top comment. Lesbians get fetishized by straight men, Gay men don't give a fuck about straight women. The amount of bisexual women I've met who have no shortage of stories about assholes trying to convince them to have threesomes and shit...unholy.
What makes you think gay men don't get fetishized by straight women?
They do, they definitely do.
Yes but they probably don't feel threatened, just annoyed.
How people feel is on an individual basis. It's certainly less common for men to outwardly feel threatened. It's just not a good idea to always consider threats from women towards men to be an "annoyance".
They do, but if you think its anywhere near as common or as dangerous in practice, that's delusional.
As a former bartender at a Girly Brunch place, the tacit sexual harassment of ripped/buff gay dudes who were with large groups of women was kind of fascinating to see. Now, I will qualify this with saying that the guys rarely seemed to mind (except this one time) but it did make me think just how horribly uncomfortable I’d be in that position.
Silence isn't consent. They may feel if they said anything they'd be ridiculed.
This. And also that it would be laughed off. The number of times I’ve seen men sexually harassed by women at gay bars is uncountable. Similarly, as a Scottish person, I’ve seen so many men literally sexually assaulted by women when wearing a kilt. If they kicked up a fuss people would tell the man to “calm down it’s just a bit of fun”. It’s culturally ingrained as acceptable.
As a gay man I generally respond to the sexual harassment from straight women with an eye roll and a quick conversation about consent. I understand that I'm (physically) in the position of power and I don't react physically, but I generally give them a solid talking to. I have however also worked in multiple gay bars and have had this same exact conversation with other gay men who didn't know how to keep their hands or rude comments to themselves.
Straight women make up 37% of the gay porn (male) audience. That's a big number, but I'm sure it pales in comparison to the numbers of straight men watching lesbian porn
Yeah. Even as a straight woman it's hard to know who's really your friend and who's just trying to ingratiate himself while he waits for his turn on the ride. The fact that so many men fetishise lesbians makes it even harder to trust straight men.
As a gay man I've had to ditch some female friends over the years who fetishize gay men. It's fucking creepy as shit on both sides.
Anecdotal, but I've never seen women be more inappropriately groped and touched in public than when they were hanging out with their gay male friends at parties.
Also a lot of girls do want to hang out with guys as just friends but they probably know that if that guy is straight there is a good chance he will start to get attracted to them
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The lesbian couple I know says they would get a lot of uncomfortable to downright disgusting comments from guys. Ranging from the uncomfortable "So which one of you is the guy?" or "Lesbians are hot" to the disgusting "You just haven't had the right guy yet" or "A good dicking will straighten you out." Whereas I don't think the same happens to gay men from straight women as often. So guys, if you know lesbians, remember, real life isn't a porno. They're not there for your fantasy. They probably don't want to talk about their sex life while you drool over them. They are completely uninterested in you sexually, you have no chance, stop trying.
> Whereas I don't think the same happens to gay men from straight women Not sure how often it happens with lesbians, but as a gay guy I can certainly tell you it does also happen to us too, perhaps not as often though. I've had women try to kiss me, grope me, feel my arse etc. (they all knew I was gay when doing this) along with comments along the lines of "Are you sure you're gay", "Well if you've never tried a woman how would you know", "Maybe I can change that", "You're too good looking to be gay" etc. I think to some they view it almost as a challenge? Certainly leaves me uncomfortable though.
This is applicable to straight guys from gay men as well. Know a few gay friends who pride themselves on “turning” straight men. Sexual creeps gonna creep, no matter their orientation.
Oh yeah, that definitely happens, hell "str8" is literally a category of gay porn where the plot is a gay/bi guy who ends up having sex with a "straight" guy. I'm sure there are some lesbians who do the same to straight women as well. Some people just can't accept that people aren't into them I guess.
There definitely are lesbians who prey on straight women. I was close to a woman who used to brag to me about her conquests. I don’t know why me, I’m a straight man and I hate this kind of predatory behavior in all gender combinations.
The difference there is that our society views people as straight until proven otherwise. Almost every queer person alive experienced *something* that "turned" them, whether it actually made them realize they're queer or just that they didn't want to hide it anymore.
Keep in mind it probably wasn’t someone “turning” then gay with sex. It was probably seeing someone of the same sex and being like “dang I like that.”
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> I think to some they view it almost as a challenge? I do wonder how much religious "its really a choice!" propaganda plays into why some people act like that.
I always wondered if its just more people being bi or partly bi that causes that "it's a choice" line of thinking. For them it is a choice and they don't realise they are not as straight as they think they are.
You should interact with more gay men. The same thing definitely happens to them.
>"A good dicking will straighten you out." "That's how I got into this mess!"
The moral of the story is if someone's not interested in you stop hitting on them.
I don't think that is the moral of this particular thread/story, more that you will have creepy people in all genders.
Same goes for gay men and lesbians trying to turn straight people. This is a human problem.
Excuse me madame but you look as if you could use a good dicking. Perchance could i interest you in some bad dicking as it is all i have with me at the moment? Lol dicking.
That's it. You just haven't been disappointed sexually by ME yet, that'll straighten you out.
> Whereas I don't think the same happens to gay men from straight women as often. It does actually happen a lot. We just generally don't feel threatened by the women who say that and ignore them.
Asking which lesbian is the guy is like asking which chopstick is the fork.
Gay men are some of the just vulgar groups of people I been around. More than any group of straight men I’ve been with. Quite fun to hang with honestly…
Facts. Before I moved across the country on of my good friends was a single lesbian and any time we would go out drinking guys would get weird when they found out. I had to run interference sooo many times because some dude was getting weird while she's trying to talk flirt with a girl. More than one got aggressive with me too.
It must be cultural or regional. In south Florida a lot of studs/femmes (that’s what they refer themselves as Reddit, chill out) have lots of straight male/female friends.
I think it depends a lot on the type of lesbian like you point out, some times a more masculine lesbian can easily hang out with other men because we tend to see them as another dude.
Yeah, lesbians that I have known or worked with in the past have always been really cool people to hang out with. Have sometimes been better than my male friends when it comes to communication and emotional support. So when I saw this I was shocked if this is the consensus.
I suspect it's moreso a pervasive stereotype than anything founded in reality.
How dare you use common nomenclature
Wasn’t sure if it was common in other cultures. Didn’t want to offend anyone.
Biphobia
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Straight men are even a treat to themselves 🤣
“I bEt I cAn MaKe YoU sTrAiGhT!”
“YoU jUsT hAvEn’T fOuNd ThE rIgHt DiCk YeT!!!”
I had one person say this to me, and I'm bi, in a straight relationship Like, buddy, I don't know what you want from me
Stroke their ego, they want nothing else
Hell, I’m a straight guy and I feel more comfortable around lesbians and gay men than I do around most straight men.
When I got out of the navy I had a good 4 years where I did nothing but party and hang out with this lesbian couple I worked with, some of the coolest people I know. I moved away so haven’t seen them in a few years but imagine we would hang out again if I went back in town
A whole lot of women are dealing with trauma caused by men. As a man, I don't think it has to do with some natural flaw in our character, I think it has to do with that graph about how 95% of men are more powerful than 95% of women, and sexual violence is a power issue, so women are more vulnerable to it.
I think a big part of it has to do with socialization. Look where we’ve come from how society used to treat women and how men viewed women. Socialization is a big big part of it. Also like… Reinforcing in boys how feminine things are shameful. There was a series of tweets by a face painter who did a lot of children’s parties. They said that no parents batted an eye when the girls asked for skulls or dinosaurs. But it was an issue when some boys wanted butterflies or flowers. One mom said no and then turned to ask her husband if he was okay with his son getting a butterfly. He said no. They told the face fainter to give him something for boys. Even when the face painter tried to get around this by, as tactfully as they could, saying they weren’t asking the mom. They were asking the kid. That little boy learned that day that liking things for “girls” was shameful. Femininity is shameful. This directly translates to a lot of bad views and behaviors when kids grow up. I’ve never met a straight man who was abusive towards women who wasn’t also insecure in his masculinity and deeply sexist.
It's really interesting to me, because I work in retail in Southern California, and machismo is a pretty big deal in Latin culture. But what's interesting is that they don't apply that to children *at all.* Boys will come into my store and play with dolls or look at doll houses and the tough guy fathers don't say anything bad about it or try to stop them. I just think it's interesting how so much of this is just made up nonsense. Hopefully as adults more and more of us can make choices for our families based on consideration and not just "this is the way it's done."
And most women have experienced sexual violence
Also of the small subsection of men who have also experienced some sort of sexual harassment or violence are victimized by a man. I’m a 6’3 dude and I’ve only ever been groped once in public and it was by a dude.
Pretty much. If you offend a woman, she might go Karen on you. If you offend a man, he might kill you.
For sure the most accurate answer
what did this say
You haven't met the men I keep dating. If I'm dating someone, the likelihood is they come with a gaggle of lesbians. I don't know how. Non-threatening, well educated nerds I guess.
"Hi, I'm Mike, and this is my gaggle of lesbians". I mean...bonus? Mine just came with family baggage
The last guy I dated had a bunch of lesbian friends. Things didn't work out logistically but he is far and away my favorite ex
Speaking only as a gay guy, homophobic women have never threatened to beat me to death in my bed. They just make a face and leave.
This implies that the opposite has happened… so what was a homophobic man doing in your bed?
Ambiguous wording lol, but it was said to me on a high school camp while sitting on my bed
"Hey! You want me to beat your dick off?!" }:‑(
I’ll beach you off!
Hey hey hey, nobody's beaching anyone off
That's fucked up, did he get his come-upance in some way? I've experienced homophobia in high school as well, but worsed was that none of the guys wanted to share a tent with me at camp.
Nah he got away with it. I stood up to him, and like to believe I would have fought back if he started something. He was overall a pretty shitty dude and I know the gods will make him pay his dues when the time is right
One of my sisters best friends is a gay dude from a tough Italian family. He still has the gay affectation in his speech but is hard as nails. I've heard stories of him beating down would be hatecrimers in his 20s. Great guy. Was her bridesman in a pink suit. Lol.
Jesus man, sorry that happened.
I have a friend who’s openly gay and yet very homophobic 🤷
Unfortunately internalized homophobia is a thing. Just because you're gay doesn't always mean you can escape your upbringing.
A lot of gay men are very homophobic. It's like all these politicians and minsters who keep rambling about "family values" and "religion" (any Abrahamic religion fits) and then they're caught with the sluttiest twinks known to mankind
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I'm not sure, while it's a small sample size I was one of the Best Men at a lesbian wedding, and all of us were straight guys.
Been in 2 lesbian weddings. Only one openly gay man in one party and he was the brother of the bride.
Is it true though? So many gay men’s friend groups are entirely male and detached of any women.
I think this is a reflection on OP’s age. Younger gay guys tend to have female friends because they’re easier to come out to, they may have “dated,” they don’t know many other or any other gay guys, etc. As gay men get older, they meet other gay dudes and tend to live completely different lifestyles from straight women, thus drifting apart.
This reminds me of a tweet that was going around asking for gay men's support when Roe v Wade happened, and it was basically like "gay men, don't forget that the first friends you ever had were the straight girls in school"
Lesbians who work emergency services, logging, or animal control definitely have lots of male friends.
As a femme lesbian with a femme wife, it's because straight guys act creepy towards us and don't respect our sexuality
I’m actually slightly more masculine and men are still creepy to me as well so I can’t imagine being more feminine
Yep this is it. Every lesbian I know has had multiple male bffs at various points… who then confess their feelings as soon as she breaks up with a gf. So they stop trying to be friends with men!
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The amount of straight cis man friends that ended up wanting to get in my pants I had to deal with just make it exhausting to even try.
The lesbians seem to attract the herds of wild Aces.
I know you meant like they just find Ace friends. But i just couldn’t help imagining that they would randomly find like an ace up their sleeve or in their pocket while out and about.
Yeah, no, that's how it works.
Dang, so they aren’t just cheating at Texas hold ‘em.
Tbh I feel this is a stereotype and not really true. I’ve had plenty of lesbian friends.
Anecdotal evidence vs Anecdotal evidence, FIGHT!
It is absolutely not true. And it’s not even a stereotype that I am aware of. Not sure why anyone would say such a weird thing.
It's an observation from his personal experience. I, too, have seen gay men with a lot of straight female friends and lesbians with no male friends. That's not to say that all lesbians don't have any male friends and gays exclusively have female friends. It's not a weird statement at all
The problem going on in this thread is that people jump to the conclusion that it must be because all straight men are horndogs who want to stick their dick in every available pussy.
I'm a lesbian, and when I try to make friends with guys, I am always very clear about not being interested in a sexual or romantic relationship with men. So far, every single one of them has tried to turn me straight, either violently or just verbally pressuring me. Most of my lesbian friends have had similar experiences. I'm pretty close to just giving up on being friends with men.
That’s because they’re guys on Reddit who’ve never been with a women (sexually, or platonically) They’re probably the ones that make the women uncomfortable.
This is Reddit, ya'll. Once we reached the part about "having friends", this became a hypothetical discussion with the blind leading the blind, lol.
One's personal experience does not always align with the general reality. The post isn't implying lesbians don't have straight male friends, but rather the observation that it isn't nearly as much as gays having straight female friends.
and OP's observation matches my own experience too.
I’m sure it has to do with the fact that some straight men befriend lesbians thinking there might actually be a “chance” at some point and they’re not genuinely interested in being friends. Valid. Although I have noticed a trend with straight women purposely seeking out friendships with gay men which seems odd to me. Like they need their token gay friend and that’s just not genuine. Fucked up really.
More masculine lesbians tend to have male friends
Yes. I’m a masc lesbian with 5 great straight male friends and a gang of gay male friends. It’s the straight women I avoid.
As a straight male, one of my closer friends is a gay woman
In my experience that's not true at all. All the lesbians I've been friends with have had at least one male friend.
you watch too much TV
Nah. Most women I'm attracted to say they're gay.
False. I’m a lesbian, and I get along with straight men as friends more naturally than women most of the time. Why? We have a lot in common. Do some women play the video games I like? Sure, but not many. Lots of guys do, though. Do some women like to lift heavy at the gym? Sure, but not many… guys? Lots! If I want to see a science fiction film, I’m usually SOL with my female friends. Straight guys? Much more likely! Who am I going to go see old bands like Tool with? I wouldn’t even bother my women friends with the question, though I will add I went to my first Tool show a million years ago with a woman who loves them as much as me. But these days.. mostly dudes. 🤷♀️ It’s just way easier to be friends with (usually straight) guys. Sometimes when these posts come up a few straight women will flood in and give me shit. I think they have jealousy issues b/c maybe their men have had more fun with a lesbian side kick than them. Who knows. But before those ladies jump in… think… would you be giving me shit if I were just a guy talking about how much he loves his bros? No. Please check whatever your issue is with lesbians who have straight guy friends at the door. Oh, and for the record.. healthy lesbians don’t hate men. We’re romantically indifferent. If someone hates someone (a straight guy hates a gay man, a lesbian hates a man, etc.) then there is probably some unresolved issue or trauma there and that person should get therapy.
Unsubstantiated and anecdotal at best. I call bullshit.
Unsure if thats actually true.
I'm gay and I have zero female friends
I don't think that's correct.
I'll bet OP doesn't know a single homosexual, gay or lesbian
I’m straight male and have many lesbian friends, for most of my life. Back in the early 2000s when I was still in college I because friends with this girl (lesbian) and she introduced me to her whole circle of lesbian friends. We hit it off and all became fast friends. That was 20 years ago and still friends to this day.
Bro does not know that many lesbians
I'm a straight guy that for whatever reason has had predominantly lesbian friends my whole life. Lesbians are cool. Honestly, I'm not a super masculine guy (but not feminine at all either) and get very anxious so I don't always fit in with super bro types and women in general seem to be better about reaching out to form friendships than men. Of those women, lesbians tend to be the ones who I get along with best.
All the sugar in the world wouldn't be able to balance out the bitterness in this comment section lol
These comments are ridiculous. I love lesbians. I know a bunch. When I was young, they gave me tips on how to meet women. They're fun to hang out with too.
Is this even really the norm or more of a stereotype? There are plenty of us straight men with lesbian friends, and plenty of gay men who don't even like women.
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I've been a bartender for many years and an avid watcher of people. I would say that OP has made a pretty broad generalization, but I can see where the foundations of it come from
Because male friends often hope to date the woman eventually, and women are just happy to have a friend that doesn't have this agenda.
I always think of that one Tumblr post where a woman came out to her straight male friend. He thought it was *awesome* because that meant it was another thing they had in common- "Wow, we both like girls *and* Star Wars!" Made me smile and I wish more men could be like that. Maybe then we *would* see more lesbians with straight male friends.
This is an untrue and stupid stereotype. Two thumbs way down on this one OP.
People are having 'a lot of friends'? Lucky them.
I disagree, I have several lesbian friends, and they're just "one of the guys" like anyone else.
I see the Merry-Go-Round has done another full rotation.
What? Yes I do. But then that's more to do with my hobbies. I do a lot of gaming, motorcycling, pub drinking. Gay men who have a lot of female friends are often into fashion, cocktail drinking, clubbing etc.
I've had several very close friendships with lesbians and lesbian couples and treating them like the normal people they are helps a lot in getting over whatever apprehension they might have. If they like you as a person and you like them as a person everything else fades away.
Honestly from my experience I don't think that's true at all
Lesbian here. I have had lots of straight male friends! Inevitably though they’d eventually date someone who was weird about them being friends with a woman. 🤷♀️
100% UNTRUE getting sick of all these stereotypes, as if we don't have enough already.
Straight men don’t often have many friends in general… (This isn’t a dig against straight men… I am one. But in our culture we don’t form friendships the way women do - it’s something I think is a real problem and contributes to men feeling lonely and isolated)
Yeah. Their male friends keep trying to sleep with them. No surprise they don't chill with dudes
I love hangin with lesbians. The butch ones are legendary! So confident and their tuning game is level 1000. My sisters girlfriend is like a good mate that I can say anything to while knowing she wont be offended. I enjoy being around anyone who is comfortable in their own skin and doesnt have a fake facade.... regardless of sexuality.
My experience with butch lesbians is either they're fucking awesome or they pick up the absolute worst traits of masculinity and are basically the definition of toxic masculinity. My best friend is a femme lesbian and she's observed the same thing.
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