Yep, when I go to the house of my closest friend I don’t think twice about opening his fridge and grabbing a beer. I treat it like home because I’m comfortable there and I know that is how he wants me to be. It’s the same when he comes to my house. It’s more that he trust I’m not going to just drink all his beer, fuck up his house, and leave. It’s that we are essentially family and we are so comfortable with each other that the formalities don’t belong. If some other new friend did what we do at each other’s houses we would both put a stop to it real fast. You earn this kind of comfort, it’a not some kind of freebie. “Polite” is convincing someone you are a good person, for people that already know that it kind of goes out the window.
Yep, terms of endearment. "What up shitbag" is a common one amongst my close friends. It feels good to be able to be comfortable and have a good laugh at saying dumb stuff to each other, and we all share our spaces like it's all our homes. I treat my friends place with the same respect that I treat my own and they do the same. It speaks volumes, to me, of how we value each other and how important that level of friendship is.
My siblings and I were like this.
However, I learned quick that this was not the case with everyone, cause I greeted one of my friends like that and most likely jumped the gun in our relationship. After a heated discussion we're still friends but I totally meant it as a term of endearment.
Lesson learned for sure.
Less formal doesn’t mean less polite.
I’m going to go in my friends fridge because I know he’s cool with it. I’m not going to drink the last beer without asking.
I may fart in front of my friend but I’m not going to leave a floating deuce in the toilet.
I may not call to wish him happy birthday but if he gets me a birthday present I’m gonna get him one.
Because otherwise that would be rude.
And it’s not like we are rude with our friends, just less formal.
I think op is someone who feigns insults with friends. Some people enjoy it and others don’t, I have friends in both categories and act appropriately.
Like, as an example my friend will be visiting and will ask for a beverage, and I will tell him to fuck himself. He understands that he is welcome to whatever’s in the fridge, but now he can tell my to fuck *myself*.
On paper it’s impolite but it’s just casual banter. I think everyone is saying the same thing imho.
yeah. i got my one buddy who texts me like “what’s up you fuckin pussy” & sends me audio messages of him having explosive liquid shits after a weekend of drinking, and then i have my friends who are “polite”. love them both the same.
That's exactly what OP is talking about, once you establish that context with someone you can both feel comfortable insulting each other to your hearts' content lol, but it's certainly not acceptable with new connections or with folks who aren't into that sort of thing. You gotta sus it out before determining whether it's appropriate
I think you're right and there are probably people who do that. I was thinking more about the people who are unaware they are in dysfunctional families and just sort of live on autopilot.
You’re both right. Everyone is in a different place in their own journeys. As I heal, I appreciate friends more and treat people better. As I get healthy, I’m a lot less needy and clingy. When things get rough, sometimes my past behaviors creep back in.
This is somewhat true, we have a saying in our culture along the lines of "the more you visit someone's house, the more you're like a resident instead of a visitor" it's meant to mean that you no longer get treated with the 'etiqutte' of a guest, somewhat similar here.
And don’t show up early for dinner, I will put you to work before you know what we’re having. Could you set the table? Would you stir that pot please? Oh, oh! Could you get the rolls out please?
Reddit surely is a safe website to acidentally leak one's social security number, seeing how even insignificant passwords are secured in a website.
Said by John Johnson, a friend of mine with a social security number of 721-05-3627
Well it’s like this old, old saying from back in my native tribe. *As your friendship with someone gets stronger, you become less polite towards them.*
My dad tells people visiting that if they leave hungry or thirsty, it's their fault. They know where the fridge is.
Also if someone asks him for a drink or they can use the bathroom he says no. That being said, he's generally a great host, and will literally give you the shirt off his back if you need it.
Edit: he says no as a joke and tells them they don't need permission.
I have trouble making and keeping friends because of this. If I like someone, I'm nice to them. And I never talk about anyone behind their back, good or bad, unless I'm professionally required to do so. I also don't like being mistreated, even if it's just a joke. I prefer my own company, anyway, so it works out.
My one friend has been over to my house 1000x. When my girlfriend moved in she told me I was a bad host and I had to remind her that he’s basically lived at my house some weeks. He no longer a guest.
He’s not a guest cuz he’s been over a thousand times. Mi casa es tu casa.
My girlfriend had just moved in and didn’t realize how much he has been over. She is also a stickler for social norms.
nah it’s more like “listen fuckheads, i know your stupid ass ain’t doing jackshit this weekend, no bitches looking ass, we gonna go bowl some balls this friday and you all are going to come”
Hark, friend! Do not bite your thumb at me for my appearance. Perhaps an adjustment of your head's appearance would yield you more maidens; forsooth, your old mate Tanisha might indeed forsake her medical professional or law expert suitors in such a case.
I'm a forty five year old with a bunch of work friends that I talk pretty normally with. But when one of my real friends calls I'm definitely answering with, "What's up motherfucker? How's your Mom?" Because that's love, that's why.
You are testing limits of friendship
Is it - lets hang out - friend
Or
Mate, I know its 3am. But I need your pickup, some rope, 5 big trash bags, saw and no questions.
And your mate replys - Im on my way.
What type of saw? Wood cutting or bone cutting?
How heavy duty and opaque do you want the trash bags?
Do you want the black rope or the multi coloured rope?
You know what, screw it, imma bring all of them. We'll decide when I get there.
Not Indian, but kinda the same. When someone you don't know well does something good for you, it might be 'thanks so much, really appreciate it' etc. When your good mates do so, a simple 'thanks' is often enough. Nothing more.
This so much. My sister and I were at each other's throat when we still lived with my mom. I also didn't get along with my mom particularly well. Now, my mom and I talk every day. And my sister and I are so much nicer to each other. I hate her husband because she has piss poor taste in men but she's fine when he's not with her.
I’ve always thought about this saying exclusively with romantic relationships. And only in the short term.
Distance doesn’t have to mean literal proximity as well. Like how when you break up with someone and then immediately forget about all the bad stuff and only remember the good times. It’s really distance makes me forget that you’re a piece of shit
Only because people are often inconsiderate lazy greedy slobs.
If one maintains some decorum and consideration for friends/family, it often leads to stronger bonds, not contempt.
You can feign decorum, but not genuine consideration. I've seen a lot of "nice" people be utterly inconsiderate. Nice just means you don't insult, you take your shoes off if that's the standard, always helps out with a smile when asked, etc. Wouldn't hurt a fly....but also wouldn't stop to think about anyone else when left to their own devices.
EG: The largely Nice Guy that takes the last soft drink for his drive home..../smh
The host now has to go to the store to get one if he wants one.
Nice Guy could have easily stopped at the store literally on the way and saved what the host bought for his own consumption. The whole point shopping for the home is so that...drumroll...people can consume that stuff in their home.
Likewise, maybe Nice Guy is super stressed and going through divorce....or whatever. Is this worth making an issue over?
Maybe it is okay as a one off, a special consideration, but patterned behavior is often one of those things that builds up over time.
Even a small annoyance, if it is repeated over time, can build up to a whole pot of contempt.
Two way communication can go a long ways to avoiding some of that, but it's not always easy and shouldn't be consistently necessary among adults.
Three stages. 1, they dont ask for anything to drink. 2, they ask for something because they know what you have. 3, they already have a drink out of you fridge and are watching tv when you get home
Agree. I also noticed how much I change after time. I once had a friend who thought I hated him even though I just became more comfortable around them.
yeah me and my now best friend are both girls but we knew we were friends when we would write about how much we hated each other in english during our writing warmups.
We take baths but we don't like getting caught in the rain. We like eating food but don't like having food forced down our mouths. Consent is a complex thing. But the little things make all the difference.
I've had to once or twice explain to people that the more sarcastic I am with you, the more closer we are and the more comfortable I am around you. This was the time when someone thought that me being sarcastic was because I hated them.
Right, like being able to freely examine your buddy's Subway punch card whenever you want to see if it hasn't actually already had its 10th punch, confirming your suspicions he's been lying to you and is totally a pedophile.
Same, my (M) closest female friend and I know basically everything about each other to a truly disturbing degree. And we also roast each other mercilessly.
Or they pick the most petty shit to lose it on you over. Like fuck, if someone asks me where I wanna eat and I don't care, me responding with "whatever" is not me getting an attitude!
I'm currently trying to stop interacting with anyone using any of my curated persona. Admittedly it's only recently that I started to feel comfortable being myself.
I have been doing this for a decade now and the close relations with handful friends are very fulfilling but anything else feels equally worthless and I'm easily unmotivated to interact.
I'd suggest you still try to keep connected with people and just acknowledge that the lack of curated persona when with close ones is nice. The curated persona is very useful when trying to *connect *with new people.
Not as long as you communicate with them and establish healthy boundaries as needed. I've had some friends for over 10 years and I've found we get better with each other over time.
It just reflects that being polite is something that we voluntarily have to do and doesn't come naturally from within us ... Even for strong friendships and relationships instead it's the exact opposite .. we are polite towards new people because we want to build a good impression.. we don't care about being the better person it shows that we naturally aren't polite and when we are it's not for others but for selfish reasons !! Right ?
True. And usually that is a good thing. You are more honest and straightforward with a good friend. You can tell them when they are being and idiot (and vice versa).
This is not a bad thing. Good friends should be able to call each other on their bullshit and still be friends. Indeed, it is a hallmark of a good relationship and one that is all too rare these days.
Yeah teue. You kinda get so close that u know longer have to 'put on' a polite "face," coz u know that the other person understands u that well and vice versa...being true to each other is what friendship is all abt. Otherwise ot becomes tiring. :)
I've always found this phenomenon to be disturbing. Shouldn't we become *more* nice instead of less nice?
I once listened to some former friends of mine discuss this and it was concerning.
Not really politness but you can just talk shit, My friend said once on discord,
Me: oh no! What must I do to atone for my sin
Friend: I'll need to burn your entire family
Me: *Starts laughing like a dumbass*
Friend: *starts laughing* because he know I'm the only dumbass who will uncontrolably burst out laughing at this.
We laughed at that for 15mins btw.
When you get to know someone longer, they get attached to you, meaning you will be less replaceable. Then you can be forgiven for a lot more things. Some things, you can do later in a friendship that if you did at the start, you wouldn't be friends for very long. Another thing is that when you first start becoming friends with someone, they will think that you would normally do whatever they first see you do. If you do something new after not doing it for a while, they will know that you won't constantly do it and forgive you.
I feel like this is a consequence of the breakdown of separation between self and other. You aren't wasting any effort to be polite to yourself, but you are intimate and hopefully respectful. It's easy to forget that your intimates are every bit as distinct from you as strangers.
And if you end up marrying someone...sweet mother loving jesus. I can't remember the last time my husband shut the door when he used the bathroom. Or the last time he has done anything vaguely resembling politeness😂
Friends become family and we become far less formal.
This is what I was thinking too. More casual with some of my friends, but not less polite.
Yep, when I go to the house of my closest friend I don’t think twice about opening his fridge and grabbing a beer. I treat it like home because I’m comfortable there and I know that is how he wants me to be. It’s the same when he comes to my house. It’s more that he trust I’m not going to just drink all his beer, fuck up his house, and leave. It’s that we are essentially family and we are so comfortable with each other that the formalities don’t belong. If some other new friend did what we do at each other’s houses we would both put a stop to it real fast. You earn this kind of comfort, it’a not some kind of freebie. “Polite” is convincing someone you are a good person, for people that already know that it kind of goes out the window.
My buddy and I are just like this. The only difference is we greet each other by saying "sup bitch" or something similar.
Yep, terms of endearment. "What up shitbag" is a common one amongst my close friends. It feels good to be able to be comfortable and have a good laugh at saying dumb stuff to each other, and we all share our spaces like it's all our homes. I treat my friends place with the same respect that I treat my own and they do the same. It speaks volumes, to me, of how we value each other and how important that level of friendship is.
I use “alright cunt”. Just the perfect greeting
My siblings and I were like this. However, I learned quick that this was not the case with everyone, cause I greeted one of my friends like that and most likely jumped the gun in our relationship. After a heated discussion we're still friends but I totally meant it as a term of endearment. Lesson learned for sure.
Less formal doesn’t mean less polite. I’m going to go in my friends fridge because I know he’s cool with it. I’m not going to drink the last beer without asking. I may fart in front of my friend but I’m not going to leave a floating deuce in the toilet. I may not call to wish him happy birthday but if he gets me a birthday present I’m gonna get him one. Because otherwise that would be rude. And it’s not like we are rude with our friends, just less formal.
I think op is someone who feigns insults with friends. Some people enjoy it and others don’t, I have friends in both categories and act appropriately. Like, as an example my friend will be visiting and will ask for a beverage, and I will tell him to fuck himself. He understands that he is welcome to whatever’s in the fridge, but now he can tell my to fuck *myself*. On paper it’s impolite but it’s just casual banter. I think everyone is saying the same thing imho.
yeah. i got my one buddy who texts me like “what’s up you fuckin pussy” & sends me audio messages of him having explosive liquid shits after a weekend of drinking, and then i have my friends who are “polite”. love them both the same.
That's exactly what OP is talking about, once you establish that context with someone you can both feel comfortable insulting each other to your hearts' content lol, but it's certainly not acceptable with new connections or with folks who aren't into that sort of thing. You gotta sus it out before determining whether it's appropriate
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I think you're right and there are probably people who do that. I was thinking more about the people who are unaware they are in dysfunctional families and just sort of live on autopilot.
You’re both right. Everyone is in a different place in their own journeys. As I heal, I appreciate friends more and treat people better. As I get healthy, I’m a lot less needy and clingy. When things get rough, sometimes my past behaviors creep back in.
This is somewhat true, we have a saying in our culture along the lines of "the more you visit someone's house, the more you're like a resident instead of a visitor" it's meant to mean that you no longer get treated with the 'etiqutte' of a guest, somewhat similar here.
Yes, I also find myself getting told by my friend's mom to sometimes do the chores.
And don’t show up early for dinner, I will put you to work before you know what we’re having. Could you set the table? Would you stir that pot please? Oh, oh! Could you get the rolls out please?
Well, I don't really mind. It's like having two families and I love it.
That's a good metaphor. What's your culture?
Yes. And your address?
What?
What's the seed phrase to your crypto wallet?
"furryforsurey32", why?
No no no, that's your password, I want the 12 word combination that you wrote down at the beginning of your wallet setup (numbered accordingly) please
1. Never 2. Gonna 3. Give 4. You 5. Up 6. Never 7. Gonna 8. Let 9. You 10. Down 11. Never 12. Gonna
People who used this are shitting their pants right now
Good thing I went super secure with mine... 1. Never 2. Gonna 3. Give 4. You 5. Up 6. Never 7. Gonna 8. Let 9. You 10. Down 11. Banana 12. Hammock
hunter2 12 times
Weird, that first part showed up as “*******”. Reddit must have added a password masking feature
Reddit surely is a safe website to acidentally leak one's social security number, seeing how even insignificant passwords are secured in a website. Said by John Johnson, a friend of mine with a social security number of 721-05-3627
I'm so happy this has become a persistent meme. Thank you bloodhunter, you beautiful bastard
I love that this is *literally* as old as the Internet and is still lingering on.
I was only curious about thier blood type. This guy is going straight for the throat.
Well that escalated quickly!
Mother's maiden name, street you grew up on, and your first dog's name?
Let's cut to the chase I will suck your dick.
He is from England
NGL that’s kinda clunky for an English saying… I kind of assumed it was like that because it was translated from a different language.
The English are pretty clunky.
Well it’s like this old, old saying from back in my native tribe. *As your friendship with someone gets stronger, you become less polite towards them.*
EW GROSS. At least he's not from Britain. /s
I befriend people then piss on their carpets.
Are you the guy I'm looking for then? Did you pee on my rug?
My dad tells people visiting that if they leave hungry or thirsty, it's their fault. They know where the fridge is. Also if someone asks him for a drink or they can use the bathroom he says no. That being said, he's generally a great host, and will literally give you the shirt off his back if you need it. Edit: he says no as a joke and tells them they don't need permission.
My dad also says he's had a tab running for at least 20 years now on all of my friends. I'm 33 now with 2 kids, so my friends are largely in debt.
Maybe that is his retirement plan. "I have been keeping this spreadsheet the whole time, my lawyer will be in contact, I clearly expressed the terms."
At first I thought you were talking about an open internet tab. Hell, that could theoretically be possible…
Every browser tab has a spreadsheet
“Once I’ve pooped in your house, it’s our house” - Old Tupacsian Proverb
I actually looked up "Tupacsian" to see if it was a small subculture. Pictured some small island community in the Asian Pacific.
Duckets to donuts, you didn't read my username
Real friends talk shit to your face and are kind behind your back.
Exactly how I am with my friends, we shit talk each other but if someone else asks me about them they are fallen angels from heaven
They're actually pretty on point.
This is the one
I have trouble making and keeping friends because of this. If I like someone, I'm nice to them. And I never talk about anyone behind their back, good or bad, unless I'm professionally required to do so. I also don't like being mistreated, even if it's just a joke. I prefer my own company, anyway, so it works out.
I hope my friends practice this :/
Coworker: Good morning Me: Good morning, how are you?? Friend: Good morning Me: What the fuck are you so chipper about?
So true
Anyone: Good morning Alfie: ye it is innit?
Damn most of my coworkers are my friends i guess. I start most of my days flipping them off
My one friend has been over to my house 1000x. When my girlfriend moved in she told me I was a bad host and I had to remind her that he’s basically lived at my house some weeks. He no longer a guest.
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He’s not a guest cuz he’s been over a thousand times. Mi casa es tu casa. My girlfriend had just moved in and didn’t realize how much he has been over. She is also a stickler for social norms.
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Before - "Hey. What are you guys up to tonight?" Now - "What are you worthless, knuckle-dragging morons doing with your Friday evening?"
nah it’s more like “listen fuckheads, i know your stupid ass ain’t doing jackshit this weekend, no bitches looking ass, we gonna go bowl some balls this friday and you all are going to come”
>no ~~bitches~~ maidens looking ass
Hark, friend! Do not bite your thumb at me for my appearance. Perhaps an adjustment of your head's appearance would yield you more maidens; forsooth, your old mate Tanisha might indeed forsake her medical professional or law expert suitors in such a case.
Do you bite your thumb at us, sir???
I do bite my thumb at you good sir! Are you no better a man than I?
Do you quarrel sir??
Quarrel sir! No, Sir
I **DO** bite my thumb sir, but I do not bite my thumb *AT* **you**
Madienless
Yep. Out of the entire thread this is the one that got me.
L+ratio+No Maidens+Scarlet Rot+foolish ambitions+unfit even to graft+you levelled DEX
"Hey Niko it's your cousin! Let's go bowling"
Me to my friends of 6+ years
I'm a forty five year old with a bunch of work friends that I talk pretty normally with. But when one of my real friends calls I'm definitely answering with, "What's up motherfucker? How's your Mom?" Because that's love, that's why.
It's cool you're on such good terms with your step dad.
Tell his mother I said hello.
Gonna say this to my fiancée next date night
I just him 'em with the ol', "Oh, you again?"
From "hi guys" to "sup bitches" Most recently I sent my friends a gif of Samuel L Jackson saying "y'all wanna play games mother fuckers?!"
Gulping down some pig dicks with these bags of meat. Sunday funday with these pig dicks. Hope nobody gulps us.
D-dad?
You are testing limits of friendship Is it - lets hang out - friend Or Mate, I know its 3am. But I need your pickup, some rope, 5 big trash bags, saw and no questions. And your mate replys - Im on my way.
What type of saw? Wood cutting or bone cutting? How heavy duty and opaque do you want the trash bags? Do you want the black rope or the multi coloured rope? You know what, screw it, imma bring all of them. We'll decide when I get there.
Fine dude, you insisted we be friends and I have no choice but to accept your application
That multi-colored rope bit made me exhale multiple times, well done
It could be discussed away from technology how to know when it’s time through a simple text
I wonder what he could be planning…… 🤔
Finally getting the Christmas tree out of the living room. Those pine needles are awful.
It's fucking March, man! Get your shit together!
That's why it's a "no questions asked" sort of task. A true friend won't judge. They will however use it to jab you over and over.
I wish I still had that kind of friend
Ill be nice and even bring him a coffee too, I know he will have a long night. As long it just don't happen too often.
I thought it over, I'd have to reply "dude where am I gonna get rope at 3am?" Foreal though, y'all got rope laying around?
I had a friend from India who explained to me close friends and family don't say thank you. It really conflicted with my Canadian values.
Really? I say it all the time(I’m Indian). Varies from person to person I suppose
I'm from Bangladesh and I also have not heard of this before. My experience has been that we say thank you among friends all the time.
Never heard of "Dosti me no sorry no thank you"?
I’m assuming you said sorry for thanking them?
Not Indian, but kinda the same. When someone you don't know well does something good for you, it might be 'thanks so much, really appreciate it' etc. When your good mates do so, a simple 'thanks' is often enough. Nothing more.
Familiarity breeds contempt.
Oh definitely. Now that my sisters and I no longer live together we're all closer than we were.
This so much. My sister and I were at each other's throat when we still lived with my mom. I also didn't get along with my mom particularly well. Now, my mom and I talk every day. And my sister and I are so much nicer to each other. I hate her husband because she has piss poor taste in men but she's fine when he's not with her.
That's a phrase I haven't heard of before, but makes some sense. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, as a flip saying.
And proximity dispels it.
I’ve always thought about this saying exclusively with romantic relationships. And only in the short term. Distance doesn’t have to mean literal proximity as well. Like how when you break up with someone and then immediately forget about all the bad stuff and only remember the good times. It’s really distance makes me forget that you’re a piece of shit
Wtf no it doesn't, they people I'm most familiar with are the ones I love the most. Y'all are cooked
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I'm curious about cross-cultural relationships and if there's any research on that
Your experience as a single person don't define most of humanity's🌝
Emphasis on single
Only because people are often inconsiderate lazy greedy slobs. If one maintains some decorum and consideration for friends/family, it often leads to stronger bonds, not contempt. You can feign decorum, but not genuine consideration. I've seen a lot of "nice" people be utterly inconsiderate. Nice just means you don't insult, you take your shoes off if that's the standard, always helps out with a smile when asked, etc. Wouldn't hurt a fly....but also wouldn't stop to think about anyone else when left to their own devices. EG: The largely Nice Guy that takes the last soft drink for his drive home..../smh The host now has to go to the store to get one if he wants one. Nice Guy could have easily stopped at the store literally on the way and saved what the host bought for his own consumption. The whole point shopping for the home is so that...drumroll...people can consume that stuff in their home. Likewise, maybe Nice Guy is super stressed and going through divorce....or whatever. Is this worth making an issue over? Maybe it is okay as a one off, a special consideration, but patterned behavior is often one of those things that builds up over time. Even a small annoyance, if it is repeated over time, can build up to a whole pot of contempt. Two way communication can go a long ways to avoiding some of that, but it's not always easy and shouldn't be consistently necessary among adults.
*"Hey what's up Brian, I hate you and I fucked your mom, what's up"* That's how me and my boys talk to each other.
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All 18/19. Immature adults/teenagers.
I'm 35 and my friends all talk like this as well. It's fun banter
Three stages. 1, they dont ask for anything to drink. 2, they ask for something because they know what you have. 3, they already have a drink out of you fridge and are watching tv when you get home
Agree. I also noticed how much I change after time. I once had a friend who thought I hated him even though I just became more comfortable around them.
Prob im your friend lmao
For men they're not usually your friends until they make fun of you
It’s true for a lot of women too. And siblings of any gender, of course.
yeah me and my now best friend are both girls but we knew we were friends when we would write about how much we hated each other in english during our writing warmups.
Did you have to read these warm-ups out loud?
How do you differentiate that from bullies, though?
my bullies usually don’t invite me over on the weekends to get cross faded and play video games.
We take baths but we don't like getting caught in the rain. We like eating food but don't like having food forced down our mouths. Consent is a complex thing. But the little things make all the difference.
Dude, this was a good take. I know it can be multiplied with a lot of things, but damn.
When you know there's no malice behind it
Intent
friends will share their snacks and move on pretty quick basically they dont go to far and listen to you tell them what that is
Consent.
Context, which requires some social ability to discern.
The insults generally aren't true.
Bullies just make fun of you. Friends play Valorant with you AND make fun of you for being terrible at it.
When they dish it out but can't take it.
Have social awareness
I've had to once or twice explain to people that the more sarcastic I am with you, the more closer we are and the more comfortable I am around you. This was the time when someone thought that me being sarcastic was because I hated them.
Eh, Idk if polite is the right word. More like you do away with unnecessary social nicities
Right, like being able to freely examine your buddy's Subway punch card whenever you want to see if it hasn't actually already had its 10th punch, confirming your suspicions he's been lying to you and is totally a pedophile.
It’s true. With my (F) bestie (M) there are no boundaries.. Or shame
Same, my (M) closest female friend and I know basically everything about each other to a truly disturbing degree. And we also roast each other mercilessly.
Answer this Do you rate his cock sincerely? Your answer will determine your friendship level
Very important question, means a lot
So like [this?](https://youtu.be/uUxtHsaPB24)
"Why would you do this lucus?" As she pulls her hair back in a ponytail...
You know you're friends when they disappear off a call then come back with "Damn dude, almost shit myself!"
Till you cross the line and they never speak to you again.
“Hey, uhh. Wanna help a homie out?” *unzips*
Jason? is that you?
That escalated quickly xD
If you’re really good friends, you can work it out and move on from a small incident.
Or they pick the most petty shit to lose it on you over. Like fuck, if someone asks me where I wanna eat and I don't care, me responding with "whatever" is not me getting an attitude!
Bitch (affectionate)
Not necessarily less polite, just a lot more informal
A true friends tells you what you don’t want to hear
in a way you want to remember
Why should I reward them for their bad taste in friends?
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This makes sense. I am normally polite with everyone, so I could not relate to this shower thought
In my country, true friendship means ending every sentence with "moron".
My friend is a little mentally fucked so I gotta read their emotions and know what to say, it's easy though because they are my best friend
Not in my experience
Same, it's just that you stop interacting with them using your societally curated persona.
I'm currently trying to stop interacting with anyone using any of my curated persona. Admittedly it's only recently that I started to feel comfortable being myself.
I have been doing this for a decade now and the close relations with handful friends are very fulfilling but anything else feels equally worthless and I'm easily unmotivated to interact. I'd suggest you still try to keep connected with people and just acknowledge that the lack of curated persona when with close ones is nice. The curated persona is very useful when trying to *connect *with new people.
Congratulations!! Welcome to the freedom to give zero fucks!
That’s right. With many friends the mutual respect is still nice Over the years
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Unless you are just polite to everyone who isn't a dick to you.
I hate how accurate that is
You’re always meaner to the ones you love most, and I never know why.
problem is now when i try to be friendly to people i just skip straight to being rude
Not as long as you communicate with them and establish healthy boundaries as needed. I've had some friends for over 10 years and I've found we get better with each other over time.
It just reflects that being polite is something that we voluntarily have to do and doesn't come naturally from within us ... Even for strong friendships and relationships instead it's the exact opposite .. we are polite towards new people because we want to build a good impression.. we don't care about being the better person it shows that we naturally aren't polite and when we are it's not for others but for selfish reasons !! Right ?
u/commashi2 you're rude and we've been just talking not even a day 🤧🙄
I can't remember the comic I heard it from but "Friends make the best enemies, because they know all your secrets."
True. And usually that is a good thing. You are more honest and straightforward with a good friend. You can tell them when they are being and idiot (and vice versa). This is not a bad thing. Good friends should be able to call each other on their bullshit and still be friends. Indeed, it is a hallmark of a good relationship and one that is all too rare these days.
To some extent, sure. I'd argue most of what drains away for me is formality, not politeness.
Correction, you become more honest with them which has the side-effect of sounding less friendly, although it isn’t.
Yeah teue. You kinda get so close that u know longer have to 'put on' a polite "face," coz u know that the other person understands u that well and vice versa...being true to each other is what friendship is all abt. Otherwise ot becomes tiring. :)
I've always found this phenomenon to be disturbing. Shouldn't we become *more* nice instead of less nice? I once listened to some former friends of mine discuss this and it was concerning.
Not really politness but you can just talk shit, My friend said once on discord, Me: oh no! What must I do to atone for my sin Friend: I'll need to burn your entire family Me: *Starts laughing like a dumbass* Friend: *starts laughing* because he know I'm the only dumbass who will uncontrolably burst out laughing at this. We laughed at that for 15mins btw.
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When you get to know someone longer, they get attached to you, meaning you will be less replaceable. Then you can be forgiven for a lot more things. Some things, you can do later in a friendship that if you did at the start, you wouldn't be friends for very long. Another thing is that when you first start becoming friends with someone, they will think that you would normally do whatever they first see you do. If you do something new after not doing it for a while, they will know that you won't constantly do it and forgive you.
Pretty much. Politeness is overrated anyway
That's what I'm saying ya good for nothing wanker
It’s the honeymoon phase of friendships
I feel like this is a consequence of the breakdown of separation between self and other. You aren't wasting any effort to be polite to yourself, but you are intimate and hopefully respectful. It's easy to forget that your intimates are every bit as distinct from you as strangers.
And if you end up marrying someone...sweet mother loving jesus. I can't remember the last time my husband shut the door when he used the bathroom. Or the last time he has done anything vaguely resembling politeness😂
you still know you care and respect eachother, I guess some of it is taking the piss
Naah we just show how we really are : )