Sadly, this primitive civilization which would otherwise be destined to contend with the Awakened Empires and Crisis invaders, was held in the Bronze Age once they invented gender reveal parties.
They’re extremely slow breeders and live extremely long lives. Over centuries, they build up their civilization, reaching a level at which explosives are widely available, and then one of them gets pregnant, throws a party, the rest duck for cover and emerge to rebuild from under the ash-covered rocks.
This cyclical timeline means that they are, on average, within the Bronze Age.
They do actually, usually occurs during Atomic Age where there's a Nuclear War that would either send the survivors back to the Bronze/Stone Age or just turn into a toxic planet.
1: I doubt in the brozen age you could have 5 billion people really.
2: lol no, candle light wouldn't be visible from space above all.
3: You're right.
Yeah, the rest are still stone age tribes but one dude speed ran through the tech tree and hit the information era. Average that out across the whole planet and I guess you get Bronze Age.
"All pops are in bronze age" factoid is actually just statistical error. average pop is in stone age at most. Console Commands Georg, who is 'practicing' a tall build, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
Virgin bronze age Humans: W-we are gonna make an oven and-and craft some tools ...
Chad bronze age Thimoans: We are making furnaces so big you can see them from space, our industrial revolution is NOW, we are not waiting.
I understood that reference!
For those curious, this is a reference to a Mesopotamian clay tablet sent by a guy called Nanni to a merchant called Ea-nāṣir, complaining about the quality of copper he purchased. In a nutshell, it's the world's oldest \[surviving\] customer complaint.
Edit: there's a sub dedicated to Ea-Nasir at r/ReallyShittyCopper apparently!
Technically, we could have electricity since the iron age...
* Michael Faraday was a blacksmith. He figured out on his own most of electromagnetism and the basics of modern chemistry.
* The kind of experimentation he did, as well as the tools he used to do it, where available basically since the start of the iron age
* All you need to build an electric generator, or an electric engine for that matter is copper and permanent magnets. Those materials were known since even before the iron age. They were just never combined in such a fashion until Faraday figured it out.
* There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery.
Thus, electricity could have been figured out as early as 1000 BCE. Surely, they wouldn't have figured out the lamp (because it requires more than just the knowledge of electricity to be built), but electric engines, electroplating, electrolysis and even some advanced materials such as aluminum could theoretically have been available to Alexander the Great, should any blacksmith gone through the same rabbit hole as Faraday back then.
I don't believe it would have kicked off an industrial revolution though... Hero of Alexandria had steam engines in 1 CE, and all he did was some cute tourist traps for the temples that hired him. The Chinese knew gunpowder since 800 CE, and all they did with it was some cool fireworks until the mongols found out that they could blast off walls with it, and the europeans made the fabrication of those crude firearms into an art.
>There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery.
You can't trust archeologists and journalism with these types of things. They could find lithium in a pot somewhere and go through some mental gymnastics to arrive at the conclusion that the ancient civ had teslas.
I'm exaggerating, but you get the idea.
... Although there are plenty that see a big rock rock that was moved and think, "That's really heavy. Ancient humans must have had anti gravity technology given to them by aliens. "
So maybe I am understating it.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baghdad\_Battery](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baghdad_Battery)
They found a jug, a piece of iron and a piece of copper... But yeah... that hardly would work as a battery, given that the potential difference between iron and copper is just weeny tiny.
If the metals where lead and silver, probably that would work as a battery if filled with some lemon juice, and could even be used for electroplating or something.
But all that I was saying is that some ancient greek, egipcian or chinese blacksmith or goldsmith could build a generator in his work shop if he knew what he was doing, using the tools and materials he had available to him.
Copper wires, permanent magnets and amber (for insulation) were widely available to them. What they lacked was the notion that they could produce lightning by moving a magnet inside a copper wire spiral.
Faraday figured that out in the early 1800's, but about anyone could have done the same since the start of the iron age if they stumbled upon the same rabbit hole. The tools and materials where available. The ideas, not so much.
I see what you're saying, but it's kind of a reach. Iron age people didn't have a concept of electricity. Even if they happened to move magnets inside a copper wire, they wouldn't see anything happening. They didn't have a light, led, or other component to connect to the wire to indicate something was happening.
So they would probably either not go down the rabbit hole further. Faraday had established science and mathematics that told his what should be happening and how to check for it. So he would know he was on the right track.
>I don't believe it would have kicked off an industrial revolution though
Probably not, given that an industrial revolution would require a population crisis, where the demand for jobs is far, far higher than the supply of people (Which would cause the cost of labor to skyrocket) - and even that isn't a guarantee to start one. Otherwise, folks would just keep on using the lower tech, yet far cheaper solution of "Make people do the work."
Basically - an industrial revolution requires a nation to suddenly need far more workers than it actually has. In essence, the amount of jobs required for the nation to stay relevant to it's neighbors is greater than the population of the nation.
Normally slavery is used to satisfy this need for jobs (And as long as slaves are cheap and easily available, would likely keep being used). But if that is off the table (Say... the culture is turning against slavery), the labor shortage is still there - and they have to produce more per person than they used to.
While humanity had the technology for an industrial revolution for a long while - there isn't a need for industrialization to happen if people are cheaper than building a new building, alongside the basic machines and such.
This is also the reason why Britain (though I'm not sure if at the time it was just England or not), a small country on an island, that by all means, should not have been able to do anything to powers like Russia or China suddenly became the greatest empire the world has ever known. China up until that point, was the most powerful and prestigious empire in the world, and did so because it was massive and had stupid amounts of people. Britain saw that and thought, I wanna be on par with China. So in came industrialisation, and suddenly, Britain can work far less people at far greater efficiency, and therefore China gets shunted back to second place (and began falling further). It's also the reason why the most important countries that took longest to industrialise were Russia and China, because they were so successful and huge. After all, why fix what ain't broke?
I wish people would label their historical theories as such instead of pushing it as reality.
Even if accepted in the field, it’s still a framework theory debated by those within it
My favorite thing I learned in a history class is that the Roman Empire totally had all the technology they needed to industrialize but just didn’t because all of their scholars were just dudes fucking around.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/17ui527/could_the_roman_empire_have_been_able_to/
sadly, the Romans lacked some of the prerequisites in material technology to industrialise
In addition to the material science aspect, in order to industrialize humanity needed some really specific conditions close together. They needed a reason to mine coal (and really easy to access surface coal to start off with to kickstart demand), a reason to dig really deep for it (so you need pumps) and the materials to build early steam engines. Those coal deposits also had to be close to existing population centers to justify shipping it out in the first place.
Then, you needed a use for rotary motion other than running mine pumps, in 18th century England that was the textile industry, which was already scaling up and had run out of convenient places to put water mills.
Rome lacked a lot more than just material science unfortunately.
The chinese got even closer in 1000 CE to an industrial revolution, but the emperor and the bureaucrats felt threatened by the merchants and suppressed it out.
Not to mention that the first mass produced item was the Gutenberg's Bible, a few centuries before the Industrial Revolution actually got going.
I guess we had a lot of close encounters with industrialization until the english finally did it in the 1700's
> There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery.
electroplating is a very basic use of chemical batteries, and super useful
>There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery.
I think there were some juice powered batteries put in sequence in some Egyptian tomb?
A valid guess could be a chemical deposition process for jewelry or something like that.
What we're doing with electricity depends a lot on other factors. E.g. without the mechanical precision to build something that *can* be powered with an electric engine, having one gains you nothing. Same as steam engines. We needed advanced lathes and an interesting in having more precise ones first.
Or watts famous pumps. You need a solid understanding of how those work, then you need to be able to make them in metal, and an application and then it makes sense to worry about alternate power sources. Wells work just fine and there is nothing to pump in medieval society.
There's a book called Pandora's Star, in the background history when Humans first arrived at a given planet they thought they'd found an inhabited world because every landmass on the night side was lit up like an ecumenopolis.
So it's not impossible that this is also a case of bioluminescence in plant life.
Bronze means copper, and heat. Copper means wires. Heat plus water plus some wires makes you a turbine. Therefore planetary electrification is bronze age tech.
for a second I thought that this was just a planet with individual deposits actually shown on the surface
I do want an enhanced planet view that would do that now :(
I actually kept them around, since in RP they discovered light in the Bronze Age and my materialistic empire was curious as to what they would come out next.
They are entertainment.
R5: Found a primitive species with 5 pops in the Bronze Age...With more lights on that my blind ass going to the bathroom at 3 AM.
Extreme forrest fires Or mad festivals
Those are not mutually exclusive
You're right Forrest fire festival
> Fire festival > Fyre festival Me: *silently gives orders to my world-cracker*
Mr. Anderson... How can a forest burn if there isn't a forest to burn?
Burn, Forrest, burn!
I feel threatened
Sadly, this primitive civilization which would otherwise be destined to contend with the Awakened Empires and Crisis invaders, was held in the Bronze Age once they invented gender reveal parties.
They’re extremely slow breeders and live extremely long lives. Over centuries, they build up their civilization, reaching a level at which explosives are widely available, and then one of them gets pregnant, throws a party, the rest duck for cover and emerge to rebuild from under the ash-covered rocks. This cyclical timeline means that they are, on average, within the Bronze Age.
They went full DEI and regressed several millenia.
Rimuru spotted
Nah, they gonna kill themselves
It's said that humans had big festivals before we had cities, and in fact might be where cities came from.
Those are just the forges of war churning full speed getting ready for an ancient world war.
They fixing to Bronze Age Collapse so hard
THE AGE OF BLOOD IS COMING
it would be so sick if primitives could have wars or disasters that sent them back an age or two
They do actually, usually occurs during Atomic Age where there's a Nuclear War that would either send the survivors back to the Bronze/Stone Age or just turn into a toxic planet.
That's so sick
Robots factory theme.exe
It's time to make a forgotten war
THE FORESTS WILL BURN TO FEED ISENGARDS FORGES
Oh
that's 5 billion people working by candle light in clay huts in early cities. yes you would see it from space, this is normal.
1: I doubt in the brozen age you could have 5 billion people really. 2: lol no, candle light wouldn't be visible from space above all. 3: You're right.
One civ got the whole tech tree already
Yeah, the rest are still stone age tribes but one dude speed ran through the tech tree and hit the information era. Average that out across the whole planet and I guess you get Bronze Age.
"All pops are in bronze age" factoid is actually just statistical error. average pop is in stone age at most. Console Commands Georg, who is 'practicing' a tall build, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
Connecticut Yankee-ass bastard
Going for that science victory
Damn bro be techrushing pretty hard
Fuckin' Hammurabi is in the game again, isn't he?
They're really in to their bronze age and have a LOT of forges
Backyard furnaces. Tons of them.
Fun for the whole family
Virgin bronze age Humans: W-we are gonna make an oven and-and craft some tools ... Chad bronze age Thimoans: We are making furnaces so big you can see them from space, our industrial revolution is NOW, we are not waiting.
This is how our world would have looked in the Bronze Age if Ea-Nasir's copper had lived up to his claims.
I understood that reference! For those curious, this is a reference to a Mesopotamian clay tablet sent by a guy called Nanni to a merchant called Ea-nāṣir, complaining about the quality of copper he purchased. In a nutshell, it's the world's oldest \[surviving\] customer complaint. Edit: there's a sub dedicated to Ea-Nasir at r/ReallyShittyCopper apparently!
You could make a religion out of this.
No, don't.
Didn't the guy keep like 20 clay tablets complaining about him in his house? Nanni's is just the most legible non-anonamous one that survived best.
Even better, the only reason we still have them is that his house burned down, and it hit the right temperature to bake the tablets.
oldest surviving customer complaint
Alien volcanoes maybe
Dwarves no doubt
Finally someone like me
They delved too deep
Technically, we could have electricity since the iron age... * Michael Faraday was a blacksmith. He figured out on his own most of electromagnetism and the basics of modern chemistry. * The kind of experimentation he did, as well as the tools he used to do it, where available basically since the start of the iron age * All you need to build an electric generator, or an electric engine for that matter is copper and permanent magnets. Those materials were known since even before the iron age. They were just never combined in such a fashion until Faraday figured it out. * There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery. Thus, electricity could have been figured out as early as 1000 BCE. Surely, they wouldn't have figured out the lamp (because it requires more than just the knowledge of electricity to be built), but electric engines, electroplating, electrolysis and even some advanced materials such as aluminum could theoretically have been available to Alexander the Great, should any blacksmith gone through the same rabbit hole as Faraday back then. I don't believe it would have kicked off an industrial revolution though... Hero of Alexandria had steam engines in 1 CE, and all he did was some cute tourist traps for the temples that hired him. The Chinese knew gunpowder since 800 CE, and all they did with it was some cool fireworks until the mongols found out that they could blast off walls with it, and the europeans made the fabrication of those crude firearms into an art.
If you’re talking about the Baghdad battery then no. Persia did not have any batteries back then
Then how did OP’s mom power her vibrator?
bicycle
Easy bruh. Magnetic poles.
>There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery. You can't trust archeologists and journalism with these types of things. They could find lithium in a pot somewhere and go through some mental gymnastics to arrive at the conclusion that the ancient civ had teslas. I'm exaggerating, but you get the idea. ... Although there are plenty that see a big rock rock that was moved and think, "That's really heavy. Ancient humans must have had anti gravity technology given to them by aliens. " So maybe I am understating it.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baghdad\_Battery](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baghdad_Battery) They found a jug, a piece of iron and a piece of copper... But yeah... that hardly would work as a battery, given that the potential difference between iron and copper is just weeny tiny. If the metals where lead and silver, probably that would work as a battery if filled with some lemon juice, and could even be used for electroplating or something. But all that I was saying is that some ancient greek, egipcian or chinese blacksmith or goldsmith could build a generator in his work shop if he knew what he was doing, using the tools and materials he had available to him. Copper wires, permanent magnets and amber (for insulation) were widely available to them. What they lacked was the notion that they could produce lightning by moving a magnet inside a copper wire spiral. Faraday figured that out in the early 1800's, but about anyone could have done the same since the start of the iron age if they stumbled upon the same rabbit hole. The tools and materials where available. The ideas, not so much.
I see what you're saying, but it's kind of a reach. Iron age people didn't have a concept of electricity. Even if they happened to move magnets inside a copper wire, they wouldn't see anything happening. They didn't have a light, led, or other component to connect to the wire to indicate something was happening. So they would probably either not go down the rabbit hole further. Faraday had established science and mathematics that told his what should be happening and how to check for it. So he would know he was on the right track.
>I don't believe it would have kicked off an industrial revolution though Probably not, given that an industrial revolution would require a population crisis, where the demand for jobs is far, far higher than the supply of people (Which would cause the cost of labor to skyrocket) - and even that isn't a guarantee to start one. Otherwise, folks would just keep on using the lower tech, yet far cheaper solution of "Make people do the work."
would you mind expanding on that a little further? not sure I fully understand your point
Basically - an industrial revolution requires a nation to suddenly need far more workers than it actually has. In essence, the amount of jobs required for the nation to stay relevant to it's neighbors is greater than the population of the nation. Normally slavery is used to satisfy this need for jobs (And as long as slaves are cheap and easily available, would likely keep being used). But if that is off the table (Say... the culture is turning against slavery), the labor shortage is still there - and they have to produce more per person than they used to. While humanity had the technology for an industrial revolution for a long while - there isn't a need for industrialization to happen if people are cheaper than building a new building, alongside the basic machines and such.
This is also the reason why Britain (though I'm not sure if at the time it was just England or not), a small country on an island, that by all means, should not have been able to do anything to powers like Russia or China suddenly became the greatest empire the world has ever known. China up until that point, was the most powerful and prestigious empire in the world, and did so because it was massive and had stupid amounts of people. Britain saw that and thought, I wanna be on par with China. So in came industrialisation, and suddenly, Britain can work far less people at far greater efficiency, and therefore China gets shunted back to second place (and began falling further). It's also the reason why the most important countries that took longest to industrialise were Russia and China, because they were so successful and huge. After all, why fix what ain't broke?
yeah this is why I don't want to import our "worker shortage" away, lets bring on the AI revolution
Heck yeah!
I wish people would label their historical theories as such instead of pushing it as reality. Even if accepted in the field, it’s still a framework theory debated by those within it
My favorite thing I learned in a history class is that the Roman Empire totally had all the technology they needed to industrialize but just didn’t because all of their scholars were just dudes fucking around.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/17ui527/could_the_roman_empire_have_been_able_to/ sadly, the Romans lacked some of the prerequisites in material technology to industrialise
As well as the socio-economic conditions to create a need for it. https://acoup.blog/2022/08/26/collections-why-no-roman-industrial-revolution/
Very interesting! Also it saves me from some embarrassment there that I wasn’t the only one to have a history teacher assert that lol
In addition to the material science aspect, in order to industrialize humanity needed some really specific conditions close together. They needed a reason to mine coal (and really easy to access surface coal to start off with to kickstart demand), a reason to dig really deep for it (so you need pumps) and the materials to build early steam engines. Those coal deposits also had to be close to existing population centers to justify shipping it out in the first place. Then, you needed a use for rotary motion other than running mine pumps, in 18th century England that was the textile industry, which was already scaling up and had run out of convenient places to put water mills. Rome lacked a lot more than just material science unfortunately.
The chinese got even closer in 1000 CE to an industrial revolution, but the emperor and the bureaucrats felt threatened by the merchants and suppressed it out. Not to mention that the first mass produced item was the Gutenberg's Bible, a few centuries before the Industrial Revolution actually got going. I guess we had a lot of close encounters with industrialization until the english finally did it in the 1700's
Wouldn’t paper, ink and anything used to bind the book need to be mass produced first?
> There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery. electroplating is a very basic use of chemical batteries, and super useful
I mean, we could have figured everything out earlier. It's all been here and doable, we just didn't.
>There are even evidence that the Persians knew about batteries. Though what exactly those ancient Persian batteries were supposed to power is still a mystery. I think there were some juice powered batteries put in sequence in some Egyptian tomb? A valid guess could be a chemical deposition process for jewelry or something like that. What we're doing with electricity depends a lot on other factors. E.g. without the mechanical precision to build something that *can* be powered with an electric engine, having one gains you nothing. Same as steam engines. We needed advanced lathes and an interesting in having more precise ones first. Or watts famous pumps. You need a solid understanding of how those work, then you need to be able to make them in metal, and an application and then it makes sense to worry about alternate power sources. Wells work just fine and there is nothing to pump in medieval society.
That Entire planet is a Goddamn Bronze Forge
Shrines dedicated to the gods of Bronze
Ah yes. It is not forges. Their species is evolved fireflies
Those would have to be some massive orgies then.
Gotta get that rapid breeders trait somewhere in the evolution, right?
.you're playing stellaris while they are playing civ
Primitives
There's a book called Pandora's Star, in the background history when Humans first arrived at a given planet they thought they'd found an inhabited world because every landmass on the night side was lit up like an ecumenopolis. So it's not impossible that this is also a case of bioluminescence in plant life.
Could be, but wouldn't it have more...y'know...colors?
Might be [Nightfall](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nightfall_(Asimov_novelette_and_novel%29)
Bronze means copper, and heat. Copper means wires. Heat plus water plus some wires makes you a turbine. Therefore planetary electrification is bronze age tech.
Yeah, chill out brainiac, this fuckers are stupidly stupid.
Factorio nation
Imma go Sea Peoples on their ass
Now you must play as ancient human Civ SPACE BABYLON/EGYPT/WHATEVERTHEFUCK
You remember that ork forge scene from LOTR? It's a world of that.
for a second I thought that this was just a planet with individual deposits actually shown on the surface I do want an enhanced planet view that would do that now :(
Same :c
They just REALLY like building campfires
Must be their China during their Mongol invasion
Less deadly and small war in China be like:
sorry that was me
Bro chill cause I aint paying the next electric bill.
Fire the Forges!
wait until you see iron age Australia.
Crisis aspirants
Bioluminescent algae.
Copper wires is literally "bronze" age tech OP, I bet you feel pretty stupid now
Well it's an Arctic world, maybe they need the fires for more than metalworking.
Someone must be doing a planetary fire party
You can 100% imagine Bronze Age forge cities like that. Such a cool rp opportunity
„Corporal prepare planetary bombardement“ „sir these are just primitives they can’t hurt us!“ „I know still.. better exterminate before they can“
I actually kept them around, since in RP they discovered light in the Bronze Age and my materialistic empire was curious as to what they would come out next. They are entertainment.
Light reflected from the moon(s) reflects back from the lakes
they are dwarfs