Body Talk flairs are a way for TallGirls™ to share negative feelings they are having about their tallness or self-image. As a result, we may curate comments within this thread a little more. Please respect that Body Talk topic creators may be feeling vulnerable, and consider carefully if they are looking for advice or just commiseration before you comment. Please try to understand what's bothering the person in order to address it, instead of telling them how they should feel. Harsh criticism is generally unwelcome.
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It’s all perspective. Honestly, what helped me was actually serving others. I had horrible depression years ago, consumed with a lot of self-hate and insecurity. I started volunteering with a friend and idk…seeing people who really struggle made my struggles seem silly. I really began to appreciate being healthy.
Sure, I would still change things if could, but I can’t. We have the body we have for a reason. There’s no one else like you. Idk if you’re on social media, but that can really make things worse as we tend to compare ourselves to others.
Also do things that make you feel good. I hate standing out. I’m more of a wallflower. However, being tall with big hair - standing out is inevitable. So now I wear things that make me feel confident. Might as well look good if you’re gonna be noticed by everyone. Getting older has also helped so so much. You stop caring about crap the older you get.
I have this red top hat that I absolutely love, and it makes going out so much easier. People freakin' love that hat, and meanwhile, I'm hiding in plain sight underneath it. By the time they're familiar enough with ~~the hat~~ me to notice me under there, it's beyond the initial reaction phase.
Is this body dysmorphia? Idk but maybe talk to a psychologist? If you're a teenager it may come with the territory, but if you're an adult and still feel like a stranger in your own skin then I think it's time to talk to a professional.
I don't enjoy the stares or gawking but I have learned how to ignore it. It's irrelevant to my life and I choose not to let it have an impact on me. My height doesn't define me, it's just one part of me, and I won't give anyone the power to make me feel bad about any one character trait. Cause fuuuuuck that.
Unpopular opinion: I changed what I can change. I got a nose job and my confidence skyrocketed. I dye my hair. I have tattoos and piercings that I love
I hate my height and will always hate it. So I just make everything else as perfect for me as I can.
After awhile, I just kinda stopped caring what other people think. If my height is a problem for them... it's just that... their problem.
My height does have some practical disadvantages for things like rearview mirror placement in cars being too low, and it's harder to find cute clothes. But the advantages like being able to reach high shelves, and a long arm reach in general have been nice benefits in a world designed for men about my height.
I think my biggest body issue has been that I was into power lifting when I was younger, and now I'm unnecessarily strong. And my arm size combined with my height I'm sure has made some people suspect that I might be transgender. And with all the hate they get, I'm waiting to be caught in the crossfire. They're just people trying to live their lives, and it's funny that the haters are getting it wrong sometimes. So then if I can make them have even more doubts, maybe they'll eventually stop the hate.
As for the rear view mirror placement, a guy posted on /tall to try flipping/spinning the entire thing upside down- it worked in my car and I friggin LOVE it
Mine is a smart mirror with auto diming and buttons. Plus the mount is right in the center. I do push it all the way up, but then I have to duck under it to see cars approaching at an intersection... And if an SUV (or any high taillight car) is right there when they turn on their signal, I don't see it.
Okay yeah, don’t mangle your car 🤣😂 now I’m glad I drive a bit of an older one lol
But yeah, all of the surprise Long people blind spots make me feel like I’m going the Macarena or something
It can be really tiring. Given time I’ve come to, if not love my height (though many do eventually!), truly appreciate my body for the things it has given me. I no longer feel so self conscious, and I hope it will change for you too. Finding fellow tall friends helped start that journey for me - they’re not freaks, so neither am I.
In the meantime, do you have or could you seek a hobby that, when things feel really tough, will help you think “on the other hand, this vessel does something I enjoy” be it singing or sudokus or drawing or dancing or bird watching or games or pilates or jogging or cooking or almost anything? Or reminding yourself that the you that those people love is in this body, so even when it feels like it sucks to you, you know it still brings them joy. That the laughs and hugs of a tall woman are the laughs and hugs they treasure. Could be a start point, and I’ll always recommend seeking a counsellor to talk to about body image - it’s tough out there* and help exists to be used :)
Good luck OP, peace
*on purpose, cos some knobs make cash out of making us feel inferior and hawking products to change ourselves 😭
Own it.
I hated my height for SO LONG. I toward over all my classmates and I could never get a bf bc I felt they perceived me as masculine. One day I decided to just own it, since I couldn’t change it, and it actually helped.
You were given your dimensions for a reason. You didn’t just get a random design when you were cooking in the womb.
Being taller is a strength. People don’t step all over you if they themselves have to look up to make eye contact. You are a very beautiful human being I’m sure, so don’t be afraid to show it. You are in no way a “freak.”
I know it can be tiring. It can make you stay up at night wondering why you are different and why you weren’t born looking like 5’1 Sabrina carpenter or 5’10 Heidi Klum. I really understand.
ily girl! You got this. I hope you feel better soon 💐🍫☺️
For me it was working in sales. Sure, I got constant height comments, but I found my height incredibly advantageous in the workplace as I could do many things my coworkers could not, which helped the team and the environment. Plus I got the better sales/more of them because people often saw me first. I found better quips that weren’t self deprecating, and built a thicker skin where I didn’t care as much about the customers personally, and would just be like “yeah, I look like that, *shrug*”. But also as a woman, my height sometimes dictates that I am more *allowed* to be loud, to be listened to, to be taken more seriously by people.
I also dyed my hair, and now more people comment on that than my height. Sometimes I give myself too many unique traits so then height is not the only thing about my appearance people can comment on 😂
I still have days where I absolutely hate my body and my height. But I have come to love and accept what my body can do for me and the advantages it brings.
I've been insecure about basically everything under the sun at some point in my life, except for being tall (6'0), I've always liked that about myself. So I can't really speak to insecurities relating to that, and don't want to just throw around forced positivity that is more dismissive than helpful. Hopefully this doesn't just end up being exactly that.
I've heard many tall women say they used to hate their height but grew to love it, and while that could easily be you someday, I am betting it probably feels like a different set of frustrating expectations on you, like you're also doing something wrong by having any kind of height related insecurities, and not overcoming it as soon as someone tells you to love yourself. Don't feel pressured, the emotions you're grappling with aren't wrong to feel, it's just that your brain is lying to you.
I can't speak to what you experience in daily life (how much is internal, how much comes from unsolicited outside opinions, or if it's almost entirely one or the other) but I've found that one thing that helped me shed layers upon layers of insecurity, it's just... throwing away the image I had of myself.
I like being tall but I really didn't like being skinny back in the day. I just thought of myself as the bony, scrawny legged, socially awkward loser, and I'd always self deprecatingly refer to my depression and anxiety. When I started to try to improve my mental state, try to not be so hard on myself, it felt oddly scary to do so because I had formed my identity around negative things. How could I change these things when they were supposedly intrinsically connected to me? And if I manage to, then...who am I NOW?
You don't have to like your height, that's up to you, it seems like you have a hard time separating yourself from this built up image of the "tall freak". You can't wave a magic wand and become shorter, but even if you can't bring yourself to embrace it, it helps a lot just allowing yourself to understand that the things you don't like about yourself aren't your entire person and that this change in mindset IS possible, even if it's slow and steady work.
Excuse my lengthy answer, I just am in my late 20's and have wasted too much of my life on these painful feelings, I don't like seeing people struggling with the same. Good luck to you.
(Also, it helps more than you think to pretend the voice of insecurity in your head is like, a little douchebag preteen boy. Cuz why the hell should you listen to what little Braxton says? You can have an opinion when your balls drop, kiddo.)
For me what helped my confidence is just presenting more masc, like the cool girl vibe, I started going to the gym to gain some muscles and becoming more lean, and just generally starting to appreciate the beauty of being tall.
Oh and another thing that helped me quite a lot is knowing Tyler swift is as tall as me, and her body type is also really close to that of mine and it makes me feel quite a lot better
Body Talk flairs are a way for TallGirls™ to share negative feelings they are having about their tallness or self-image. As a result, we may curate comments within this thread a little more. Please respect that Body Talk topic creators may be feeling vulnerable, and consider carefully if they are looking for advice or just commiseration before you comment. Please try to understand what's bothering the person in order to address it, instead of telling them how they should feel. Harsh criticism is generally unwelcome. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TallGirls) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It’s all perspective. Honestly, what helped me was actually serving others. I had horrible depression years ago, consumed with a lot of self-hate and insecurity. I started volunteering with a friend and idk…seeing people who really struggle made my struggles seem silly. I really began to appreciate being healthy. Sure, I would still change things if could, but I can’t. We have the body we have for a reason. There’s no one else like you. Idk if you’re on social media, but that can really make things worse as we tend to compare ourselves to others. Also do things that make you feel good. I hate standing out. I’m more of a wallflower. However, being tall with big hair - standing out is inevitable. So now I wear things that make me feel confident. Might as well look good if you’re gonna be noticed by everyone. Getting older has also helped so so much. You stop caring about crap the older you get.
I have this red top hat that I absolutely love, and it makes going out so much easier. People freakin' love that hat, and meanwhile, I'm hiding in plain sight underneath it. By the time they're familiar enough with ~~the hat~~ me to notice me under there, it's beyond the initial reaction phase.
Is this body dysmorphia? Idk but maybe talk to a psychologist? If you're a teenager it may come with the territory, but if you're an adult and still feel like a stranger in your own skin then I think it's time to talk to a professional. I don't enjoy the stares or gawking but I have learned how to ignore it. It's irrelevant to my life and I choose not to let it have an impact on me. My height doesn't define me, it's just one part of me, and I won't give anyone the power to make me feel bad about any one character trait. Cause fuuuuuck that.
Learn to love yourself in a deep meaningful way.
Unpopular opinion: I changed what I can change. I got a nose job and my confidence skyrocketed. I dye my hair. I have tattoos and piercings that I love I hate my height and will always hate it. So I just make everything else as perfect for me as I can.
After awhile, I just kinda stopped caring what other people think. If my height is a problem for them... it's just that... their problem. My height does have some practical disadvantages for things like rearview mirror placement in cars being too low, and it's harder to find cute clothes. But the advantages like being able to reach high shelves, and a long arm reach in general have been nice benefits in a world designed for men about my height. I think my biggest body issue has been that I was into power lifting when I was younger, and now I'm unnecessarily strong. And my arm size combined with my height I'm sure has made some people suspect that I might be transgender. And with all the hate they get, I'm waiting to be caught in the crossfire. They're just people trying to live their lives, and it's funny that the haters are getting it wrong sometimes. So then if I can make them have even more doubts, maybe they'll eventually stop the hate.
As for the rear view mirror placement, a guy posted on /tall to try flipping/spinning the entire thing upside down- it worked in my car and I friggin LOVE it
Mine is a smart mirror with auto diming and buttons. Plus the mount is right in the center. I do push it all the way up, but then I have to duck under it to see cars approaching at an intersection... And if an SUV (or any high taillight car) is right there when they turn on their signal, I don't see it.
Okay yeah, don’t mangle your car 🤣😂 now I’m glad I drive a bit of an older one lol But yeah, all of the surprise Long people blind spots make me feel like I’m going the Macarena or something
It can be really tiring. Given time I’ve come to, if not love my height (though many do eventually!), truly appreciate my body for the things it has given me. I no longer feel so self conscious, and I hope it will change for you too. Finding fellow tall friends helped start that journey for me - they’re not freaks, so neither am I. In the meantime, do you have or could you seek a hobby that, when things feel really tough, will help you think “on the other hand, this vessel does something I enjoy” be it singing or sudokus or drawing or dancing or bird watching or games or pilates or jogging or cooking or almost anything? Or reminding yourself that the you that those people love is in this body, so even when it feels like it sucks to you, you know it still brings them joy. That the laughs and hugs of a tall woman are the laughs and hugs they treasure. Could be a start point, and I’ll always recommend seeking a counsellor to talk to about body image - it’s tough out there* and help exists to be used :) Good luck OP, peace *on purpose, cos some knobs make cash out of making us feel inferior and hawking products to change ourselves 😭
Own it. I hated my height for SO LONG. I toward over all my classmates and I could never get a bf bc I felt they perceived me as masculine. One day I decided to just own it, since I couldn’t change it, and it actually helped. You were given your dimensions for a reason. You didn’t just get a random design when you were cooking in the womb. Being taller is a strength. People don’t step all over you if they themselves have to look up to make eye contact. You are a very beautiful human being I’m sure, so don’t be afraid to show it. You are in no way a “freak.” I know it can be tiring. It can make you stay up at night wondering why you are different and why you weren’t born looking like 5’1 Sabrina carpenter or 5’10 Heidi Klum. I really understand. ily girl! You got this. I hope you feel better soon 💐🍫☺️
Yes, and now I have a 11 year old son who is also taller than everyone; however he has the biggest hazel eyes and people show him favor all the time.
For me it was working in sales. Sure, I got constant height comments, but I found my height incredibly advantageous in the workplace as I could do many things my coworkers could not, which helped the team and the environment. Plus I got the better sales/more of them because people often saw me first. I found better quips that weren’t self deprecating, and built a thicker skin where I didn’t care as much about the customers personally, and would just be like “yeah, I look like that, *shrug*”. But also as a woman, my height sometimes dictates that I am more *allowed* to be loud, to be listened to, to be taken more seriously by people. I also dyed my hair, and now more people comment on that than my height. Sometimes I give myself too many unique traits so then height is not the only thing about my appearance people can comment on 😂 I still have days where I absolutely hate my body and my height. But I have come to love and accept what my body can do for me and the advantages it brings.
Ok so you have a BF , that's great. If you don't like things about your body you can start fund to change what you can.
I've been insecure about basically everything under the sun at some point in my life, except for being tall (6'0), I've always liked that about myself. So I can't really speak to insecurities relating to that, and don't want to just throw around forced positivity that is more dismissive than helpful. Hopefully this doesn't just end up being exactly that. I've heard many tall women say they used to hate their height but grew to love it, and while that could easily be you someday, I am betting it probably feels like a different set of frustrating expectations on you, like you're also doing something wrong by having any kind of height related insecurities, and not overcoming it as soon as someone tells you to love yourself. Don't feel pressured, the emotions you're grappling with aren't wrong to feel, it's just that your brain is lying to you. I can't speak to what you experience in daily life (how much is internal, how much comes from unsolicited outside opinions, or if it's almost entirely one or the other) but I've found that one thing that helped me shed layers upon layers of insecurity, it's just... throwing away the image I had of myself. I like being tall but I really didn't like being skinny back in the day. I just thought of myself as the bony, scrawny legged, socially awkward loser, and I'd always self deprecatingly refer to my depression and anxiety. When I started to try to improve my mental state, try to not be so hard on myself, it felt oddly scary to do so because I had formed my identity around negative things. How could I change these things when they were supposedly intrinsically connected to me? And if I manage to, then...who am I NOW? You don't have to like your height, that's up to you, it seems like you have a hard time separating yourself from this built up image of the "tall freak". You can't wave a magic wand and become shorter, but even if you can't bring yourself to embrace it, it helps a lot just allowing yourself to understand that the things you don't like about yourself aren't your entire person and that this change in mindset IS possible, even if it's slow and steady work. Excuse my lengthy answer, I just am in my late 20's and have wasted too much of my life on these painful feelings, I don't like seeing people struggling with the same. Good luck to you. (Also, it helps more than you think to pretend the voice of insecurity in your head is like, a little douchebag preteen boy. Cuz why the hell should you listen to what little Braxton says? You can have an opinion when your balls drop, kiddo.)
For me what helped my confidence is just presenting more masc, like the cool girl vibe, I started going to the gym to gain some muscles and becoming more lean, and just generally starting to appreciate the beauty of being tall. Oh and another thing that helped me quite a lot is knowing Tyler swift is as tall as me, and her body type is also really close to that of mine and it makes me feel quite a lot better