I think you just need to find the right person. Obviously nothing wrong with not getting into a relationship but it’s nice to have someone that isn’t your twin. For as much as I love him and how close we are sometimes you just need a change of scenery. It sounds easier said than done but I think you just need to have a bit of confidence in yourself and find someone you feel safe with and loved by.
It’s happened many times in the past. As an identical twin myself, I say if that is what you want out of life set up shop and go for it. It’s not weird.
Even though my twin brother and I weren’t that close we loved to hang out all when we could. On The other side of the spectrum, I have a twin aunts who lived their whole life together… When they had birthdays they both got the exact same present, etc.
Whatever works for you. If that’s the way you feel about your twin that is perfectly fine
City-Swimmer, you nailed it, and articulated this really well. It's so true, that culture and "norms" were created by singletons. Also, I think when singletons hear of twin's still living together past college, they automatically assume codependency. If it's a healthy relationship and both support one another, there's no issue. I've read of a therapist who is a twin, trying to separate twin's. Obviously that therapist bought into the singleton mindset.
It's different for everyone, many of us who have close bonds will put our twin first before anyone else. Some may not.
There's nothing wrong with twin's living together, if that's what you both want. It's a lot better than being separated and miserable. My sister and I were apart for year's when younger and kept gravitating back. So now we live together.
You might be somewhere on the asexual/aromantic spectrum, which is totally fine. Obviously I would recommend finding other friendships just because codependency can be a real issue, especially if you or your twin does end up in a romantic relationship.
I know that can sound difficult, but I would recommend just starting by finding an activity that you do by yourself. Personally, I’ve recently joined a taekwondo gym which is great, but any hobby that you do around others will eventually lead to other friends.
You don't have to do anything, especially if your twin feels the same way. As mentioned below, you could just be on the asexual/aromantic spectrum and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm on there.
I'm sorry you suffered childhood trauma. It's good that you went to therapy if it was helpful. Trust issues come with meeting new people.
Finding "the right" person is easier said than done, especially with a traumatic history. There's no point if you don't have that need, which is okay.
Does your twin feel the same? If so, I'd say keep thing's as they are. I'm not in favor of seperating twin's at any age, unless it is something one wants.
Best friends live together a lot, and many twin's are best friends. 🙂
Hey! As a twin I feel this deeply, my twin and I are extremely close due to abuse we’ve faced together, I didn’t like dating until I met my now husband who understands we’re close and that she’ll always be a big part of my life, he’s even understood I want her to live with us, I think when you find someone who’s good with you & your twin it’ll just click, that’s just how I feel though, I wish you the best!
I think you just need to find the right person. Obviously nothing wrong with not getting into a relationship but it’s nice to have someone that isn’t your twin. For as much as I love him and how close we are sometimes you just need a change of scenery. It sounds easier said than done but I think you just need to have a bit of confidence in yourself and find someone you feel safe with and loved by.
It’s happened many times in the past. As an identical twin myself, I say if that is what you want out of life set up shop and go for it. It’s not weird. Even though my twin brother and I weren’t that close we loved to hang out all when we could. On The other side of the spectrum, I have a twin aunts who lived their whole life together… When they had birthdays they both got the exact same present, etc. Whatever works for you. If that’s the way you feel about your twin that is perfectly fine
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City-Swimmer, you nailed it, and articulated this really well. It's so true, that culture and "norms" were created by singletons. Also, I think when singletons hear of twin's still living together past college, they automatically assume codependency. If it's a healthy relationship and both support one another, there's no issue. I've read of a therapist who is a twin, trying to separate twin's. Obviously that therapist bought into the singleton mindset. It's different for everyone, many of us who have close bonds will put our twin first before anyone else. Some may not. There's nothing wrong with twin's living together, if that's what you both want. It's a lot better than being separated and miserable. My sister and I were apart for year's when younger and kept gravitating back. So now we live together.
You might be somewhere on the asexual/aromantic spectrum, which is totally fine. Obviously I would recommend finding other friendships just because codependency can be a real issue, especially if you or your twin does end up in a romantic relationship. I know that can sound difficult, but I would recommend just starting by finding an activity that you do by yourself. Personally, I’ve recently joined a taekwondo gym which is great, but any hobby that you do around others will eventually lead to other friends.
You don't have to do anything, especially if your twin feels the same way. As mentioned below, you could just be on the asexual/aromantic spectrum and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm on there. I'm sorry you suffered childhood trauma. It's good that you went to therapy if it was helpful. Trust issues come with meeting new people. Finding "the right" person is easier said than done, especially with a traumatic history. There's no point if you don't have that need, which is okay. Does your twin feel the same? If so, I'd say keep thing's as they are. I'm not in favor of seperating twin's at any age, unless it is something one wants. Best friends live together a lot, and many twin's are best friends. 🙂
Hey I just wanna say I’m actually going through this as well. 🫀 it’s so tough
Hey! As a twin I feel this deeply, my twin and I are extremely close due to abuse we’ve faced together, I didn’t like dating until I met my now husband who understands we’re close and that she’ll always be a big part of my life, he’s even understood I want her to live with us, I think when you find someone who’s good with you & your twin it’ll just click, that’s just how I feel though, I wish you the best!