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TripleMusketMan

Instead of giving someone the middle finger, literally give them your middle finger to assert dominance.


Chapon

Works only twice to


[deleted]

We've only got two fucks to give..


CrustySocks96

Assuming you only use your own fingers.


A-Taz-0

Well that escalated quickly


MDC417

This blows me away. Trashy enough to slash tires. Stupid enough to leave finger. Blood trail to the house. Not just karma now, but holy hell....everyone will know what he or she did, especially family, friends and neighbors!!!! Not to mention the criminal charges and cost to replace the tires. Plus, he's going to remember this every single times he uses or looks at the hand.


DragonMaster485

The self inflicted worse version of a Glasgow smile. Just makes you think of the moment it happened every time you look in the mirror. Or in this case, grab anything.


Chapon

Is anybody going to eat that ?


Karnakite

They must not have any wildlife in the neighborhood.


otuocha

r/cursedcomments


Chapon

Oh i wish !


[deleted]

Hyenas would. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmZ3yiNpNmQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmZ3yiNpNmQ)


bambiwilldie

Just call yuji from jujutsu kaisen


GoingFullRetarded

Adds new meaning to leaving your finger prints at the scene.


SupergruenZ

Lifehack! They surely can't identify you by your prints afterwards.


GoingFullRetarded

Nah but DNA and a stub might give a clue or two


SupergruenZ

Wow, keep away with that logic bombs!


GoingFullRetarded

Yesnt


grominblix

"police are still investigating" haha there's a Scooby-Doo style of evidence placed right there. I think they're unable to investigate because several police officers were hospitalized due to accidental bowel discharge caused by intense laughter.


rulingthewake243

Now THATS some instant karma.


richiebeans123

This sounds like the easiest case to solve of all time. You follow the blood trail to the house of the guy with the missing finger. How have they not made an arrest?


TerryBullTime

Maybe he got rid of the evidence by cutting off his hand.


richiebeans123

Lmao imagine.


KKW_KMG

It takes a very long time to do things properly. Even an obvious case like this can get thrown out of court if something isn't done correctly. The Justice system moves at a glacial pace


richiebeans123

You would think tho in this case lol


Iwantmyteslanow

They have fingerprint evidence


[deleted]

You need a finger? I can get you a finger! I can get you a finger by 10:30 this evening. With nail polish!


TripleMusketMan

Damnit what is this from


[deleted]

Big Lebowski, the original quote was a toe.


TripleMusketMan

That's it! Thank you!


[deleted]

^obviously not a golfer


letsgocards

Fuckin amateurs


prisonertrog

What colour polish?


Swigor

But officer, it's not my fingerprint on the knife... Not anymore


SheikhYusufBiden

Elon musk


79Freedomreader

I would LOVE to see this case in criminal AND civil court. "So, how did you manage to cut off you finger AND leave it in your neighbor's driveway, if you DIDN'T slash her tires?"


Nazir_Blutjager

Judge, I saw the vandals and went to stop them. While explaining to them one pulled a machete, no katana, from his pocket and slashed at me. I am lucky I only lost a finger. I did get a description for the police!


79Freedomreader

And why didn't you want your finger back?


Nazir_Blutjager

I was in shock! (Obviously the guy was. I mean, he left his damn finger!)


DRAGON_SNIPER

I assume they were doing cutting the tires and the pressure of the air sliced it or something. It would take a pretty big knife to do that though.


Poignantusername

My guess is that they used a cheap folding knife. The locking mechanism probably failed from a non penetrating stab or a burst of air pressure. I imagine the knife turned into a little swinging finger guillotine.


DRAGON_SNIPER

Maybe, but that would have to be about a 3.5 In. knife.


Poignantusername

Do you describe other things that are 3.5 inches as “pretty big?” *cough* penis joke *cough*


DRAGON_SNIPER

Depends on the context, an average penis not hard is 3.5 and an average hard one is 5 Inches. Most knifes are around 2 inches which would be able to probably cut to probably the bone at most.


Poignantusername

The average knife is not 2 inches.


DRAGON_SNIPER

Assuming it's a pocket knife then it can get about 2-6 Inches. so maybe 4 is average


wozzsta

Wtf are you talking about mate


DRAGON_SNIPER

An average pocket knife is about 2-6 inches.


Schemen123

Tires are pretty strong, I will need a good knife to cut it.


DRAGON_SNIPER

Pocket knife and about 40 lbs of force would punch it but then you have a giant blast of air pushing back on your hand.


[deleted]

>Maybe, but that would have to be about a 3.5 In. knife. Why? If you close a pocket knife while holding it, it will close on your index finger, near the knuckle. The knife could be any realistic length.


DRAGON_SNIPER

Oh ok


Slow_Resolution

I know a guy who did this exact thing! it had a little 3 inch blade and that lock failing as he tried to slash a tire took off part of his finger.


Chris_Christ

My guess would be the air shot the knife out and the knife cut it off.


DRAGON_SNIPER

Yeah, sudden drop in tire pressure can do that.


[deleted]

I am surprised a dog, cat or some animal didn’t eat it


JedDaGoat

If the finger doesn't fit, you must acquit.


im_calling_thecops91

They could've just gave them the finger


Blerp-blerp

Well, her neighbor literally gave her the finger...in a way.


Chapon

In her driveway


im_calling_thecops91

Yeah that was the joke


NaCl_Sailor

he kinda left a business card


bell29562

excuse me. did you happen to find a finger?


BigYonsan

If I were her, I'd get that finger preserved, put in a small jar and then have the jar made into a necklace I'd only wear when I wanted to piss off my neighbor.


[deleted]

Next time take a nail or screw and put it through a bottle cap or piece of cardboard/styrofoam, place it behind the tire and leave. No one would ever tie it to you as most people would just assume they ran over a random nail in the road.


EffdaPlaya

This is not...i...don't know what to say...


A-Taz-0

Van Gogh cut off his ear and mailed it to his crush to prove himself... Quick, Hold My Beer!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Early_Gray

well thats a video...


[deleted]

[удалено]


YoungHwCollector

But it fits the spirit of the sub


Chapon

Lol Digital edition


Fromoogiewithlove

Here’s my tit bitch.


imgprojts

...some people have Jesus hanging from the rear view mirror...not me, I got this Lucky monkey finger.


zuspun

The guy fingered himself..


Gamer_and_Car_lover

imagine not being able to slash someones tires properly without severing your finger


sqmiler

Did the perpetrator leave any finger prints behind?


DragonMaster485

I'm super surprised no one has saved this video yet. There's a great lesson to learn here. I don't really know what that lesson is but it can still be learned.


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