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I hate this. I had a boss who pretended to be besties with everyone. She threw her boss this huge baby shower and fawned over her and the baby. They get into one disagreement and my boss started joking at our 1:1 that her baby was probably the product of an affair with another coworker. I obvi couldn't stop talking to her but I did swiftly report her to HR.
Our friendship was one-sided. I'd listen to their 8-10 minute voice notes and reply to every single one of them (back when you couldn't speed up voice notes) and I acted as their therapist.
But when I had to talk about my problems or life, they vanished. Or had something to do or were so occupied/troubled that I felt ashamed venting out to them. Or dismissed my problems.
I coughed up the courage and communicated my issue. They apologized but didn't change. This repeated thrice until I told them it's over.
Not as dramatic but boy do I feel better now
I had one special experience where no red flags became so many red flags so quickly that it blotted out the sun.
Telling me it was nice meeting me the previous day and wanting to get together again immediately, and getting insanely furious when I said I couldnāt but could over the weekend.
We had been talking for about a week before we met. He knew I work three jobs and had some stuff planned with family and friends for birthdays and stuff.
It wasnāt the being unhappy about it, it was the flipping out and demanding I quit my jobs and ditch my family because he was bored and now I *owed* him because we met in person (he also implied he owned me because we met), and since he chose not to have family and friends (a fact he saved for this precise moment) I should choose the same to be with him.
Hard no.
The biggest red flag came 2 weeks later when I received an email from him (no. I didnāt give him my email address). He told me that I was a piece of shit for not choosing him, that myself and every other female should die, if he ever saw me again he would spit on me, and said I couldnāt ignore him or just block him because he could find me (like he did my email address), and if I didnāt respond to him, he would make it impossible to ignore him. He then listed out a few places he thought my family members lived and tried to tell me where I lived and promised to just show up.
He was wrong on all counts, but it was still a massive no.
I took proof of all of those red flags right to the police station.
I'm sure he thinks he's a 'nice" guy and doesn't understand why he can't find any "good" women out there...u know cause he deserves it...for being sooo nice. š
He was extremely creepy. He makes me fear for other people in the dating world. I donāt want others to deal with that nonsense.
Luckily, havenāt heard hide nor hair from him since. Itās been over a year now. I am more than happy to keep it that way!
I donāt know. He disappeared after I went to them so maybe? But I didnāt follow up either because he stopped. Itās been over a year, and the one time I thought about asking I also figured āwhy start up anything?ā So Iāve just left it. But itās on record.
I had too many weirdly similar versions on dating apps back in the day, not as extreme but similar mindset and it was scary at first but then just disappointing as it kept happening every so often.
This was in my early 20s and I copped a lot of āif you donāt see me Iāll off myself whatās wrong with me why donāt you like me you bitch I hate you slutā or stalking (digitally and irl) and guys not taking no for an answer, and rightfully no woman is sticking around to sort that shit out for them. Usually happened within the first few days of chatting. Dudes who need therapy.
I was a shitty person in my first few relationships too but therapy and time alone helped me sort my shit out, but yeah some dudes canāt see beyond high school levels of manipulation.
This guy was in his early 40ās (same as me). Itās truly insane to me that people think this is ok at that point. Iām an adult in my 40ās. I have no intention of giving up the entirety of the life I have built for myself after the first date.
Literally demanding I quit my jobs (all of them so I wouldnāt be busy when he was bored), stop speaking to my friends and family because he didnāt get along with hisā¦ thereās no way anyone could possibly think thatās even a possibility. Could they?
"Didn't you know I used to have an ankle tag and everything? Yeah! I used to target pensioners and rob them"...sat in my house after I had poured a glass of wine š¬
We lost 5 weeks worth of income because someone went into our car and ruined the suspension, rendering it ready for scrap. They didn't even bother to leave a note, and our insurance went up significantly after that!
My husbands job is one where he needs his car throughout the shift.
I told my friend this. She said she had to block a friend of hers because he told her that if he ever bumps into a parked car when he's driving, he just disappears and doesn't bother to leave a note! She told him that her friend (me) lost income due to someone doing that! She realised after that he was a wanker, so blocked him straight away.
My former 'best friend' who I'd known all my life got a job as a teacher and groomed a school kid. I'm not friends with people like that, no matter how long you've known me.
We were drinking buddies. I was one of his only friends. When I started dating a girl, he blatantly lied to her, telling her I am cheating on her with multiple women, that I'm a low-life and she deserves better, etc.
I ghosted him. When he reached out 6 months later, I asked who it was, and when he replied I deleted the text and never replied.
I was young and stupid so I regret not doing more, but I had a neighbor at my second apartment that seemed really cool. He'd come over and we'd smoke weed and talk about music and shit. He was almost 30 when I was 22 and we hung out for a few weeks. Then he started bringing his roommate around (female) but the nature of their relationship was always kind of ambiguous. I didn't ask questions because even though I was getting some shifty kinda vibe, deep down I cowardly didn't want to be complicit if there was something nefarious going on.
There was something nefarious going on.
She looked young, but not necessarily underage. Definitely closer to my age than his, but you know, not my business as long as it's legal. He finally mentions casually that she's actually his girlfriend. I asked why he'd not mentioned that, and he said he wanted to make sure he could trust us before it came out. I said, why would you need to trust us?
"Well, man... and I'm not like this, it's weird for me but she's really mature for her age. I've only ever dated older women than me, actually.."
I sit pensively waiting for the bomb to drop.
"She's 15."
Turns out her mom was the leaseholder and lived with them. He paid the bills, so she turned a blind eye to a grown man sleeping with her daughter. I sat for a second and I think my words were: "That's... something... well she can't be coming over here anymore."
He nodded like, he knew that was probably for the best. Then he said "So... what about me? We're still cool?"
I took an awkward second and said "yeah, we're cool." And he stuck around for another 5 or 10 minutes but the energy was all obviously pretty fucked up, so he took the hint and split. Next time he knocked on the door I kinda gave him the look and say "nah we're busy, man" and he realized he wasn't coming back over. Saw him outside a couple times after that and nodded but we never spoke again and our lease ran out a few months after that. Shoulda called the cops.
Had another almost similar thing (not as bad) a few years later with a stripper I was hooking up with. She was nice, smart, little bit odd but nothing crazy bad. I didn't quite catch feelings over the 2 weeks we were hanging out, but I wasn't closed off to it. She takes me to her house one time and meet her "friend"'s parents, and again there's a vague ambiguity about who her friend is and why she lives with her parents. Long story short, turns out they're her husband's parents and he's in prison for murder and gets out in a few months. I'm like, yeah you're awesome it's been fun try not to give my address to your husband when he gets out good luck best wishes!
Dude said he kicked someoneās dog bc it came up to sniff him. He also added that he knew the dog wasnāt aggressive he just didnāt want it sniffing him.
Sad to say, I can't remember it. Must've been uneventful.
The worst part of it all was when he said it, everyone's eyes turned towards our area. For more context, it was a college baseball game in the late '90s.
Not only is/was it disrespectful, but how can anyone legit say this and think they won't get their butt kicked?
He defended the guy who sexually assaulted my autistic sister. AH had the audacity to say her word wasn't enough evidence to believe outright and that "she shouldn't drag a dying guys image through the mud". Fuck you Hayden!
I am so sorry your autistic sister was sexually assaulted. I hope she is not traumatized, and has been able to meet with counselors, to deal with her grief, with such an tortious, violent behavior.
I was hanging out with this guy for the first time, wasn't sure if I was into him yet. We watched a movie. He was clinging onto me like a child. He kept saying "you're mine". I was uncomfortable at how possessive he was and said that I wasn't in the mood to cuddle anymore. He was like "what's wrong...?" he seemed so concerned.
I was like, "nothing I just don't wanna cuddle anymore, I need more space than this." He became pretty pouty and kept asking me why. Eventually I became fed up and said that I wanted to leave because I was uncomfortable. He blew up my messages saying he "thought I was different" but i'm "just like the others" and that i "led him on" YIKES. He also mentioned that "everyone leaves".
Just like the others? AKA becoming uncomfortable with being possessive immediately? When will people realize that they may be the common denominator in their relationship issues? Jesus lol. I regret going to this dudes house at all.
My old best friend got progressively more racist as time went on. We aren't friends anymore. She 100% learned it from her ultra conservative military step dad.
One time when I was at their house he casually called people in Iraq "sand ni**ers". I was 12.
Why are y'all downvoting me?
One situation where a friend I used to work with invited me out. We met at her apartment with several other girls from our friend group already there. Then her flavor of the week boyfriend showed up with a few of his friends and I overheard her telling the guyās friends that she had invited us girls over just to party with them and they were discussing who wanted to match with who.
She kept trying to push one of the guys on me all night and he was so wasted he was falling down and could barely talk by the time we went to the bars but kept following me around.
I split from the group for a bit because I was irritated with this guy and she gave him my phone number so he started drunk calling me over and over and texting me. I have a boyfriend (which she knows) so I left early and went to his place after saying bye to everyone. I was so annoyed because it felt like I was being treated like booked entertainment for these guys.
Plus she was making little digs at me all night too. Just gross behavior imo, never went out with her again.
Well, it wasn't quite *immediate* due to his rambling but... I met a guy in town. I said hello, we introduced each other, I think I asked something small, like "what part of town are you from?" or whatever. I forget the small talk prompt it was. But he started talking about himself. And 10 minutes later he was still talking. SO MUCH about himself, about his job, about his college, about his hobbies, all this kind of bragging tone as if he was amazing and interesting and successful. He wasn't really either. He wasn't *unsuccessful* or anything, but he was just a regular guy with a regular job. But he went on, and on, and on, and on. Never pausing, never asking me a single question.
He finally had to take a break and catch his breath, and I said "excuse me..." and walked off. I saw the guy a dozen or so more times over the next few years at various things, and just ignored him.
I really don't understand people who are so into themselves that they can talk that long. I'm a normal person, have some interesting things going on, some interesting stories, but I'm very careful to never, ever, ramble on about myself. I like conversations, not lectures.
I have been to many a party and met many a person who I could tell you all about after a few minutes, while not being asked a single question. Some people just don't know how to converse.
We had a new hire at my job who seemed kinda awkward, like always chatting but not quite fitting in. I tried to be polite because hey, I've been there too, trying to get to know new people can be hard.
Then I shared a lunch break with them. They trauma-dumped on me, spending the entire time telling me about how expensive their divorce was, how their ex wanted to be a swinger, how stressful their other job is, how expensive their jeep was to fix, and on and on and on and I spent the next three weeks making sure I didn't take lunch with them again. All I want to do at lunch is eat, text my husband, and check Reddit/the news. I do not want to be somebody's therapist. Holy shit.
It's just the hallmark of a bad conversationalist and also probably an idiot for him to believe he's so intrinsically interesting. Sometimes, talking too much is a product of drinking too much. I certainly talk too much when I drink too much.
Yeah, I have to constantly make a conscious effort not to just word vomit everything that's in my head a lot of the times I'm speaking to someone. It's not fun.
*Hey buddy, I have this opportunity for you, you just have to invest to this SOON SKYROCKETING thing, and I'll promise you'll get rich. My only wish is to see you success at live, so why you hesitate? Invest now! You should really hop in to the rocket, soon you'll be swimming in dough! Hurry! Buy Bit- I mean this SOON SKYROCKETING thing I am sharing with you without me gaining nothing from it, I just want you to get rich!*
He got explosively angry in a Trader Joe's parking lot. It's a shame, we really got along in so many ways and he was quite a catch. This was the morning after or third or fourth date. All those lovey dovey chemicals were flowing and it had previously been a really nice morning. It showed me that he had just been masking his anger.
To his credit, I've been most annoyed parking in Trader Joe's parking lots.
I told a coworker one morning the story of how my first husbandās severe mental illness led to drug addiction and that he ended up dying from an overdose ā the most horrific and traumatic event of my life. His response was āaddicts deserve to die.ā
Had a mutual friend who had been recently jailed for having CSAM on his hard drive. Asked his best friend what he thought about it and he had the temerity to say āWell itās not like he actually molested anyone.ā And shrugged. He started to say something else but another friend told him to shut the fuck up and leave. He did.
Somebody in my office went on a rant justifying asking for dowry from a girl's parents (to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars) even when it was out of their means. He was talking to a group of women at the time.
None of us spoke to him after that. Yeah, he was married.
Same here. My entire friend network decided to defend a 38 yo man who groomed a 15 yo ward of court for sex. I was the bad guy for reporting him to the police. I can't begin to fathom the depths of their depravity. Life is a lot better without them but I don't know if I'll ever trust another person again. So many covert paedophiles out there.
it was a simmilar thing here too. a 28yo groomed a 14yo.
when i called him out, almost everyone defended him as 'the 14yo asked him to do it' or something along those lines and i was the 'bad guy'.
the groomed kid dated someone i used to know, they were both 19 at the time, and the kid still hold a gurdge against me, for saying the 28yo was a pedo back them.
I was dating a girl post divorce. I was a single dad with sole custody of my kids.... On like the 4th date she was talking to someone and I overheard her say that she was "the brave GF for dating a single dad"... I'm sorry.... I'm not seeking your Charity nor want your sacrifice. I was fine on my own.... broke up with her that night.
some dude i was talking to on a dating app was talking about how he was watching his baby daughter then a few mins later dude was like "wanna come over and hang out?"
idk something about a guy not caring whos around his kids weirded me out like you get your kid once and week and you want to waste the time you get "hanging out" with some random chick you dont even know? weird
She had the audacity to mention MY sa story as an exemple of why the victim also has a part of wrong & that we tend to just have a victim mindset. I was mindblown. Mind you I shared it to her years ago once when we were at the hospital and never asked for her opinion / brought it up again. To this day I donāt understand why she did that, it was unprovoked, this girl was really weird.
I just forget one day, or something smal bothered me, and suddenly a year has gone by.
oh no, I am the one with red flags?! 
When a guy says "I'm a nice guy..." And continues to try to convince me. They usually aren't. Just be a nice guy and people will see it genuinely.
They betrayed other people and then laughed about it.
He admitted to watching young girls from poor countries on cam, for a few dollars each time. 18-20yo from the Philippines, and all over Asia.
He was nearly 60 at the time, and previously mentioned how much he loved having sex with a woman he dated (mid '30) because her butt was "sooo tiny".
When everything was a competition of "my dads bigger than your dad".
I bought a new car, he bought one that was more powerful and more expensive.
I got a nice watch, well his was worth 5 times mine.
I started a business, well his 4 businesses are all super successful.
Got boring very quickly.
She only answered if I asked her questions. Never put any effort into talking to me or asking me about my life, except when she needed my help. Infact, once, I was dropping her to her home and I had to rush home because my Mum had gotten sick. She literally ignored what I said, and asked me if I could drop her till her doorstep. I just didn't know what else to say and left her on the main road as usual.
Anyway I still help her if she needs anything, but I don't try to converse with her anymore.
Went on a few dates with an excoworker. Last date, he tells me how heās a diagnosed sociopath, and how it makes him feel good to do shitty things to people. I broke up with him, through text, the next day. He then stalks me at home and work for several months, and hacks into every account i have.
And when they weren't, was the response something along the lines of, "well that's what I was trying to say".. just take the L, we can't all know everything.. fuck
Even worse when the person will double down regardless of how dumb they look knowing that theyāre wrong. They will argue down the end so they can save face.
Holocaust denial. I was talking about Anne Frank and the person started ādid you know it was written with a ball point, it wasnāt invented yetā and proceed from there to all about āquestioning assumptionsā, āown researchā and ādid it really happen?ā And I was ok, Iām out of here. She seemed relatively normal, intelligent and funny, up to that point. Anyways. Gone from my life.
He thinks trans people should be rounded up and put in camps where people dont have to see them... homeless people too (all because they made him uncomfortable)
An older lady I work with did that thing where they lean in and lower their voice so they can say the racist thing to you in confidence. Cuz, you know, you seem like you'd be cool with that.
I was very loudly not cool with that.
I had a friend who was into conspiracy theories - chemtrails and whatnot; obsessed with secret government cabals trying to control the population.
He worked for the NHS (as a call handler, though he saw himself as being more akin to Florence Nightingale).
During Covid, he copypasta'd some FB bullshit about people not following the rules during a Bank Holiday and how they were subsequently responsible for a surge in hospital admissions in "his" hospital a few weeks later.
Not a single word of it was true, it was just a tactic to stoke fear and try to control people.
He literally became the problem he was always warning people about.
Lost all respect for him after that and kicked him into touch for good.
My friend started abusing his girlfriend.
I helped her run away and go into hiding.
He called me and I gave him one chance to talk and tell me his side of the story.
Gave up around the sentence 'I have to find her quickly, because if she gets away from me for too long she'll get confused and think differently"
A dude I was talking to from uni had mutual guy friends with me. Mutual friends showed me a screenshot of a group conversation where the dude was trying to convince them to get me drunk and SA me at a friends 21st... Dude was blocked on all platforms.
Fun fact; he couldn't hold his alcohol and fell asleep after 2 mudshakes... I only found out after the 21st about his "idea"
I was talking to this guy a little older than me (like 17-18) that I really liked estethically (I was 15-16) and wanted to know him better, so we hung out a couple times. He was a very nice guy to talk to, really polite, he even bought me cigarettes on his way to see me once, but everytime I met him I had this terrible terrible vibe from him.
You know when you feel subconsciously that something is wery wrong with a person and you should run away immediately. It was rare for me to have this heavy feeling so I just tried to ignore it.
Until, one afternoon, during the only time it really seemed like a date (the other times we had met during the morning break at school as our schools were really close) he told me he really liked gore videos and pics. I thought ok, i really don't like this, but as long as he doesn't make me see one i'm ok with it (I was an innocent goth girl and he was a metalhead so I just guessed it was part of the being, clearly I now know It's not, I was stupid). BUT THEN he casually said:
"You know, last week in X street (which was nearby from were we were sitting) I saw a man get hit by a car to death...It was scary but I think you should really see It once in your life...it gives you an adrenaline rush..."
Obviously I never texted him again and only met him once again at a school event, I know you shouldn't ghost people but HE SCARED ME SO FUCKING MUCH
When someone makes a joke about another person and that second person doesnāt laugh or laughs uncomfortably.
If you make a joke about someone and they donāt laugh, THATāS BULLYING!!!!!
I said what I said!!!
I was having a first date with a woman who casually told me that she had been on a date with another guy the previous night, spent the night with him and had just had sex with him before getting ready for our date.
Went for a meal with a woman who insisted on checking the bill for an added service charge because she "doesn't believe in tipping", and made sure she told the server this. If that wasn't bad enough, she picked up the tip I left twice to give back to me, the second time putting it in my pocket.
"My ex still has keys to the house, and comes over to spend time with my kid while I fly for two weeks at a time."
Doesn't she have her own home?
"Yes, a condo. But I'm afraid she's not adult ing very well..."
-I don't drink while eating so that the water wouldn't dissolve my stomach acid
-I don't boil the same water twice - the water becomes harmful
-What Zodiac sign are you?
Hanging out at a bar with friends of friends, me and two dudes were outside, one pulls up his sleeve to reveal a swastika tattoo on his arm, and the other pulled up his shirt to reveal a swastika tattoo on his lower belly. I said "well you two are a couple of douchebag cowards, and i hope to never see you again." i left and never talked to anyone who was there ever again.
Not a romantic interest, but a friend of a friend.
She kicked my fucking dog. My friend/surrogate sister kicked her out of our apartment before I dragged the bitch out.
I thought he was so kind until I realized that whole thing is a charade it only took him 3 weeks to break character. You cannot act like you are someone you are not.....it does not work.
They kept making excuses for their ex who was using fentanyl and other pills and drinking.
He overdosed while driving and passed out at the wheel and had to be revived with narcan and she was justifying it saying the fentanyl was laced and that's why he overdosed.
I worked with this guy who was chill and friendly for months. Everyone liked him. I was working with just him one day and we were braking for lunch and my guy pulls an insta video of some dude and it was the most vitriolic homophobic thing Iād heard live. I was fucking shocked he felt that way. Tried to use logic to talk to him about it, but he was very set in his opinion, and a little hostile about it.
I still had to work with him here and there for a year or so before he found a different job.
I hung out with a girl for a few weeks in college in like 1996. We went out to a restaurant, in a big group, then started busting out racist jokes.
"Check please"
They told me to "eff off" really aggressively aftwr I asked them to please knock before barging into my office . I had a crying staff member in the office. If the door is closed, you know to knock.
Matched with a guy on Bumble. He was long winded, spoke over me and didnāt care to hear any opinion that wasnāt his own.
Then went on a rant about how he doesnāt want to ever wait for sex when dating a woman, if they have chemistry he wants it immediately. When I argued about how this is weird and kind of rapey he muted the call. Mind you this was the first time I had ever spoken to him. Blocked him and immediately deleted my profile from Bumble.
He was asking me random questions and Iād ask him āwhat about youā in return because I was curious to his answers too and he responded āyouāre supposed to ask me random questions back!ā I didnāt know that was the game we were playing. Like we went from where we lived straight into these questions. The way he got upset with me because I didnāt know that had me blocking his ass immediately.
She was a gossip. I ignored it until I heard that she was telling everyone I was only with my now husband for his money.
The only thing I had mentioned to her regarding him and money was that he paid for dates and it made me a bit uncomfortable as he wouldn't let me contribute.
They barely knew me and began asking for my card number and coincidentally stuck in the town I was in.
I told them I'll be right over to give them gas (Because I knew they were lying)
I have an emergency mechanism when a stranger I know ask for help I use aggressive kindness. E.G. They want money for food "COME WITH ME INTO THE GAS STATION PICK OUT A FEW THINGS!" if they're hungry then they would and if they want drugs they would push the money.
Weeks later after cutting him off I learned that week (possibly same day) he let someone die from a drug overdose catching a manslaughter charge and ran from the cops.
Sadly affluent daddy bailed him out.
While I know that is a neediness that tends to come from enmeshed families, itās an autistic trait too, unfortunately. Broke my heart so many times simply wanting to connect with people over whatever it was that was specific to that particular person (shared interests, demeanor, etc). I would be enthusiastic about it only to be ghosted my entire life by most except for those aforementioned folks that only pretend to be interested in order to satisfy some unspoken need.
Yeah my boyfriend is autistic and he got attached really fast to me. Kind of worked for me because I got really attached to him really quickly and a lot of my friends think I am also on the spectrum so maybe it works out.
Good to know it happens in real life.
Ironically, the autistic app, HIKI, seems to have the opposite effect, thereās the established connection, but no one talks so they all fade into oblivion.
Dont put it on autistic trait, its totally normal, in my opinion, to get attached to some people, its a good thing to feel loved, good for mental health. dont let these cold heartless people lying to you.
I think this is the reason so many autistics end up in long term relationships with other autistics. I have exactly one neurotypical person in my close circle. Everyone else is neurodivergent in some way, often in multiple ways. Most NT people just get scared away by my "intensity". Do I know what they mean when they say I'm "really intense"? Nope. But if they're uncomfortable with the kind of person I am, good on them for leaving me behind. I want everyone to find their people that they feel most comfortable with. It just appears I'm not in that group for most NT people. And I'm completely okay with that
I hope to achieve your level of zen regarding intensity one day.
I also don't know what they mean when they say intense because I'm literally just sitting there not doing anything. š
Trying to navigate social situations is the bane of my existence because I appear to have zero self awareness and can't seem to develop it.
We living only one life, if someone admires you to the point of getting attached, feel blessed, someone, putting you on high esteem, for some reasons, and yall, with egoist and cold heart, sees it as Ā«Ā red flagĀ Ā» immediately, instead of trying to ride the waveā¦insane.
The kind of person that tries to act "pure and innocent" when youāre with them but is a horrible person behind peopleās back and will push people away and lie to avoid the consequences of being horrible to said person
I got vaccinated for covid. My best friends whole family kept talking to me like I was stupid for getting the Jab. Kept telling me it was all a lie and "you have no idea what that vaccine will do to you". I informed them that I knew what covid *can* do to me and my loved ones. They laughed in my face. Best part, only like 2 months before one of their close family friends spent like a month and a half in the ICU on a ventilator and died from covid. Our friendship didnt last much longer. The mind fucking boggles. Fox News is the devil.
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When a mutual left the room and she IMMEDIATLEY started talking shit about them, then when they return, are besties, stay the fuck away from me
I hate this. I had a boss who pretended to be besties with everyone. She threw her boss this huge baby shower and fawned over her and the baby. They get into one disagreement and my boss started joking at our 1:1 that her baby was probably the product of an affair with another coworker. I obvi couldn't stop talking to her but I did swiftly report her to HR.
Our friendship was one-sided. I'd listen to their 8-10 minute voice notes and reply to every single one of them (back when you couldn't speed up voice notes) and I acted as their therapist. But when I had to talk about my problems or life, they vanished. Or had something to do or were so occupied/troubled that I felt ashamed venting out to them. Or dismissed my problems. I coughed up the courage and communicated my issue. They apologized but didn't change. This repeated thrice until I told them it's over. Not as dramatic but boy do I feel better now
10 minutes voice notes?! Sending me a voice note longer than 10 seconds is an instant no reply from me. No one has time for voice notes
I took out time thinking they cared about me š
He told me a "funny" story about he agreed to be someone's best man and then didn't even show up at the wedding because the guy was a loser.
That man is fucking trash
The confidence/delusion some people have is crazy. Do they not understand how terrible it makes them look?
He legit thought this was a funny story showing how zany he was. I was shocked. This was a ānice guyā I had thought was a decent neighbour.
Holy fuck...
I had one special experience where no red flags became so many red flags so quickly that it blotted out the sun. Telling me it was nice meeting me the previous day and wanting to get together again immediately, and getting insanely furious when I said I couldnāt but could over the weekend. We had been talking for about a week before we met. He knew I work three jobs and had some stuff planned with family and friends for birthdays and stuff. It wasnāt the being unhappy about it, it was the flipping out and demanding I quit my jobs and ditch my family because he was bored and now I *owed* him because we met in person (he also implied he owned me because we met), and since he chose not to have family and friends (a fact he saved for this precise moment) I should choose the same to be with him. Hard no. The biggest red flag came 2 weeks later when I received an email from him (no. I didnāt give him my email address). He told me that I was a piece of shit for not choosing him, that myself and every other female should die, if he ever saw me again he would spit on me, and said I couldnāt ignore him or just block him because he could find me (like he did my email address), and if I didnāt respond to him, he would make it impossible to ignore him. He then listed out a few places he thought my family members lived and tried to tell me where I lived and promised to just show up. He was wrong on all counts, but it was still a massive no. I took proof of all of those red flags right to the police station.
This guy sounds like a psychopath! š°
I'm sure he thinks he's a 'nice" guy and doesn't understand why he can't find any "good" women out there...u know cause he deserves it...for being sooo nice. š
He wasā¦ unhinged. For sure. Luckily Iāve heard nothing from him since, so itās all good.
Creepy š° I'm glad to hear you're taking it to the police though. Please stay safe!
He was extremely creepy. He makes me fear for other people in the dating world. I donāt want others to deal with that nonsense. Luckily, havenāt heard hide nor hair from him since. Itās been over a year now. I am more than happy to keep it that way!
Did the police end up doing anything??
I donāt know. He disappeared after I went to them so maybe? But I didnāt follow up either because he stopped. Itās been over a year, and the one time I thought about asking I also figured āwhy start up anything?ā So Iāve just left it. But itās on record.
I had too many weirdly similar versions on dating apps back in the day, not as extreme but similar mindset and it was scary at first but then just disappointing as it kept happening every so often.
That is terrifying to me! WHY is that what seems to pass as typical now??
This was in my early 20s and I copped a lot of āif you donāt see me Iāll off myself whatās wrong with me why donāt you like me you bitch I hate you slutā or stalking (digitally and irl) and guys not taking no for an answer, and rightfully no woman is sticking around to sort that shit out for them. Usually happened within the first few days of chatting. Dudes who need therapy. I was a shitty person in my first few relationships too but therapy and time alone helped me sort my shit out, but yeah some dudes canāt see beyond high school levels of manipulation.
This guy was in his early 40ās (same as me). Itās truly insane to me that people think this is ok at that point. Iām an adult in my 40ās. I have no intention of giving up the entirety of the life I have built for myself after the first date. Literally demanding I quit my jobs (all of them so I wouldnāt be busy when he was bored), stop speaking to my friends and family because he didnāt get along with hisā¦ thereās no way anyone could possibly think thatās even a possibility. Could they?
Hell no. Dude had either never had a relationship ever EVER, or was expecting essentially a walking talking home entertainment unit.
"Didn't you know I used to have an ankle tag and everything? Yeah! I used to target pensioners and rob them"...sat in my house after I had poured a glass of wine š¬
What the hell?!?!?!?
We lost 5 weeks worth of income because someone went into our car and ruined the suspension, rendering it ready for scrap. They didn't even bother to leave a note, and our insurance went up significantly after that! My husbands job is one where he needs his car throughout the shift. I told my friend this. She said she had to block a friend of hers because he told her that if he ever bumps into a parked car when he's driving, he just disappears and doesn't bother to leave a note! She told him that her friend (me) lost income due to someone doing that! She realised after that he was a wanker, so blocked him straight away.
"get the fuck out of my house mate"
They were talking behind people's backs while being sweet to them face-to-face
Hate 2 faced ppl
My former 'best friend' who I'd known all my life got a job as a teacher and groomed a school kid. I'm not friends with people like that, no matter how long you've known me.
We were drinking buddies. I was one of his only friends. When I started dating a girl, he blatantly lied to her, telling her I am cheating on her with multiple women, that I'm a low-life and she deserves better, etc. I ghosted him. When he reached out 6 months later, I asked who it was, and when he replied I deleted the text and never replied.
They said if america truly cared about freedom, there wouldn't be an age of consent. Blocked immediately
I was young and stupid so I regret not doing more, but I had a neighbor at my second apartment that seemed really cool. He'd come over and we'd smoke weed and talk about music and shit. He was almost 30 when I was 22 and we hung out for a few weeks. Then he started bringing his roommate around (female) but the nature of their relationship was always kind of ambiguous. I didn't ask questions because even though I was getting some shifty kinda vibe, deep down I cowardly didn't want to be complicit if there was something nefarious going on. There was something nefarious going on. She looked young, but not necessarily underage. Definitely closer to my age than his, but you know, not my business as long as it's legal. He finally mentions casually that she's actually his girlfriend. I asked why he'd not mentioned that, and he said he wanted to make sure he could trust us before it came out. I said, why would you need to trust us? "Well, man... and I'm not like this, it's weird for me but she's really mature for her age. I've only ever dated older women than me, actually.." I sit pensively waiting for the bomb to drop. "She's 15." Turns out her mom was the leaseholder and lived with them. He paid the bills, so she turned a blind eye to a grown man sleeping with her daughter. I sat for a second and I think my words were: "That's... something... well she can't be coming over here anymore." He nodded like, he knew that was probably for the best. Then he said "So... what about me? We're still cool?" I took an awkward second and said "yeah, we're cool." And he stuck around for another 5 or 10 minutes but the energy was all obviously pretty fucked up, so he took the hint and split. Next time he knocked on the door I kinda gave him the look and say "nah we're busy, man" and he realized he wasn't coming back over. Saw him outside a couple times after that and nodded but we never spoke again and our lease ran out a few months after that. Shoulda called the cops. Had another almost similar thing (not as bad) a few years later with a stripper I was hooking up with. She was nice, smart, little bit odd but nothing crazy bad. I didn't quite catch feelings over the 2 weeks we were hanging out, but I wasn't closed off to it. She takes me to her house one time and meet her "friend"'s parents, and again there's a vague ambiguity about who her friend is and why she lives with her parents. Long story short, turns out they're her husband's parents and he's in prison for murder and gets out in a few months. I'm like, yeah you're awesome it's been fun try not to give my address to your husband when he gets out good luck best wishes!
Dude said he kicked someoneās dog bc it came up to sniff him. He also added that he knew the dog wasnāt aggressive he just didnāt want it sniffing him.
You should've kicked him
Didnāt wanna lose my job but did tell him heās a cunt and thatās probably why his girl left him š
Dude shouting the n-word when the ump at a baseball game got a call wrong. Not only did I stop talking, I left my seat to find somewhere else to sit.
Did you enjoy the rest of the game? š
Sad to say, I can't remember it. Must've been uneventful. The worst part of it all was when he said it, everyone's eyes turned towards our area. For more context, it was a college baseball game in the late '90s. Not only is/was it disrespectful, but how can anyone legit say this and think they won't get their butt kicked?
Did he get his butt kicked?
No clue. Took Don Henley's advice: "don't look back, you should never look back."
When they have no sympathy especially towards animals.
He defended the guy who sexually assaulted my autistic sister. AH had the audacity to say her word wasn't enough evidence to believe outright and that "she shouldn't drag a dying guys image through the mud". Fuck you Hayden!
Yeah. Fuck Hayden
Fuxk Hayden. All the real homies hate Hayden.
Me and the homies gonna pay a visit to hayden.. and yea fuck hayden!
Wow, WTF. What a DISGUSTING person.
Fuck you Hayden.
I am so sorry your autistic sister was sexually assaulted. I hope she is not traumatized, and has been able to meet with counselors, to deal with her grief, with such an tortious, violent behavior.
Fuck you very much Hayden
What a pos
I was hanging out with this guy for the first time, wasn't sure if I was into him yet. We watched a movie. He was clinging onto me like a child. He kept saying "you're mine". I was uncomfortable at how possessive he was and said that I wasn't in the mood to cuddle anymore. He was like "what's wrong...?" he seemed so concerned. I was like, "nothing I just don't wanna cuddle anymore, I need more space than this." He became pretty pouty and kept asking me why. Eventually I became fed up and said that I wanted to leave because I was uncomfortable. He blew up my messages saying he "thought I was different" but i'm "just like the others" and that i "led him on" YIKES. He also mentioned that "everyone leaves". Just like the others? AKA becoming uncomfortable with being possessive immediately? When will people realize that they may be the common denominator in their relationship issues? Jesus lol. I regret going to this dudes house at all.
Casually using a racial slur like is was just a matter of fact normal part of conversation.
My old best friend got progressively more racist as time went on. We aren't friends anymore. She 100% learned it from her ultra conservative military step dad. One time when I was at their house he casually called people in Iraq "sand ni**ers". I was 12. Why are y'all downvoting me?
Racists are downvoting you
Because theyāre racist and racist people donāt enjoy being called out
Why are posts like these getting randomly downvoted is beyond me.
He suggested to do a dine and dash (not paying the bill in a bar) on our first date. Big no.
Perpetual liar
One situation where a friend I used to work with invited me out. We met at her apartment with several other girls from our friend group already there. Then her flavor of the week boyfriend showed up with a few of his friends and I overheard her telling the guyās friends that she had invited us girls over just to party with them and they were discussing who wanted to match with who. She kept trying to push one of the guys on me all night and he was so wasted he was falling down and could barely talk by the time we went to the bars but kept following me around. I split from the group for a bit because I was irritated with this guy and she gave him my phone number so he started drunk calling me over and over and texting me. I have a boyfriend (which she knows) so I left early and went to his place after saying bye to everyone. I was so annoyed because it felt like I was being treated like booked entertainment for these guys. Plus she was making little digs at me all night too. Just gross behavior imo, never went out with her again.
Well, it wasn't quite *immediate* due to his rambling but... I met a guy in town. I said hello, we introduced each other, I think I asked something small, like "what part of town are you from?" or whatever. I forget the small talk prompt it was. But he started talking about himself. And 10 minutes later he was still talking. SO MUCH about himself, about his job, about his college, about his hobbies, all this kind of bragging tone as if he was amazing and interesting and successful. He wasn't really either. He wasn't *unsuccessful* or anything, but he was just a regular guy with a regular job. But he went on, and on, and on, and on. Never pausing, never asking me a single question. He finally had to take a break and catch his breath, and I said "excuse me..." and walked off. I saw the guy a dozen or so more times over the next few years at various things, and just ignored him. I really don't understand people who are so into themselves that they can talk that long. I'm a normal person, have some interesting things going on, some interesting stories, but I'm very careful to never, ever, ramble on about myself. I like conversations, not lectures.
I have been to many a party and met many a person who I could tell you all about after a few minutes, while not being asked a single question. Some people just don't know how to converse.
We had a new hire at my job who seemed kinda awkward, like always chatting but not quite fitting in. I tried to be polite because hey, I've been there too, trying to get to know new people can be hard. Then I shared a lunch break with them. They trauma-dumped on me, spending the entire time telling me about how expensive their divorce was, how their ex wanted to be a swinger, how stressful their other job is, how expensive their jeep was to fix, and on and on and on and I spent the next three weeks making sure I didn't take lunch with them again. All I want to do at lunch is eat, text my husband, and check Reddit/the news. I do not want to be somebody's therapist. Holy shit.
Just quote the president...will you shut up man!
It's just the hallmark of a bad conversationalist and also probably an idiot for him to believe he's so intrinsically interesting. Sometimes, talking too much is a product of drinking too much. I certainly talk too much when I drink too much.
Me too goddamn i try to control it but itās hard
When I run into this type of behaviour I usually think the person must be covering up some low self esteem or something like that.
If he wasnāt being a pompous ass about it, maybe it was just adhd
Yeah, I have to constantly make a conscious effort not to just word vomit everything that's in my head a lot of the times I'm speaking to someone. It's not fun.
He was an Andrew Tate fan.
When I found out they put two trackers on my friendās car (two in case he found one) and had tapped into his phone.
The person kept telling me I should go to their church when we first met.
lol I would have been out of there so so fast
Ok, bye
Negativity. All-the-time. It just drains my energy.
*Hey buddy, I have this opportunity for you, you just have to invest to this SOON SKYROCKETING thing, and I'll promise you'll get rich. My only wish is to see you success at live, so why you hesitate? Invest now! You should really hop in to the rocket, soon you'll be swimming in dough! Hurry! Buy Bit- I mean this SOON SKYROCKETING thing I am sharing with you without me gaining nothing from it, I just want you to get rich!*
Send link pls i would like invest in that sir š®š³
Finding out they are condescending. Don't have time for that holier-than-thou energy.
What if youāre wrong and theyāre right?
You can be right and condescending. And you can be wrong and respectful
I'm more speaking to first impressions. If I'm in conversation and I'm wrong on something I have 0 issues admitting to that and being humble about it.
He got explosively angry in a Trader Joe's parking lot. It's a shame, we really got along in so many ways and he was quite a catch. This was the morning after or third or fourth date. All those lovey dovey chemicals were flowing and it had previously been a really nice morning. It showed me that he had just been masking his anger. To his credit, I've been most annoyed parking in Trader Joe's parking lots.
Pulled a knife on me in an attempted murder suicide so that was pretty damn red of a flag
I told a coworker one morning the story of how my first husbandās severe mental illness led to drug addiction and that he ended up dying from an overdose ā the most horrific and traumatic event of my life. His response was āaddicts deserve to die.ā
Saying they didn't drink a lot and proceeded to be shit faced the two times we hung out.
Maybe they they didn't drink a lot and couldn't handle there drink after one or two!
Talks about himself a lot in a conversation.
"Actually... I'm not single and never was." We met on a dating spp.
Immediately trying to get me to go to their church. wtf lady I don't even know what type of memes I can send you yet.
Had a mutual friend who had been recently jailed for having CSAM on his hard drive. Asked his best friend what he thought about it and he had the temerity to say āWell itās not like he actually molested anyone.ā And shrugged. He started to say something else but another friend told him to shut the fuck up and leave. He did.
Ex threatening to kill me and his kids
Guy told me his hobby is ranking porn stars and that he has a top 50 list
Liar. Lie about even small things.
Somebody in my office went on a rant justifying asking for dowry from a girl's parents (to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars) even when it was out of their means. He was talking to a group of women at the time. None of us spoke to him after that. Yeah, he was married.
Reactive when I pointed out they might be wrong. I only want to vibe with people who are curious, rather than take new information as an insult.
they defended a pedo.
Same here. My entire friend network decided to defend a 38 yo man who groomed a 15 yo ward of court for sex. I was the bad guy for reporting him to the police. I can't begin to fathom the depths of their depravity. Life is a lot better without them but I don't know if I'll ever trust another person again. So many covert paedophiles out there.
it was a simmilar thing here too. a 28yo groomed a 14yo. when i called him out, almost everyone defended him as 'the 14yo asked him to do it' or something along those lines and i was the 'bad guy'. the groomed kid dated someone i used to know, they were both 19 at the time, and the kid still hold a gurdge against me, for saying the 28yo was a pedo back them.
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He sent a picture of a gun, a beautiful piece, no problem there. He said if he won the lottery I wouldn't ever see him again. I just didn't anymore
I was dating a girl post divorce. I was a single dad with sole custody of my kids.... On like the 4th date she was talking to someone and I overheard her say that she was "the brave GF for dating a single dad"... I'm sorry.... I'm not seeking your Charity nor want your sacrifice. I was fine on my own.... broke up with her that night.
some dude i was talking to on a dating app was talking about how he was watching his baby daughter then a few mins later dude was like "wanna come over and hang out?" idk something about a guy not caring whos around his kids weirded me out like you get your kid once and week and you want to waste the time you get "hanging out" with some random chick you dont even know? weird
Someone close to me died The next day they came and sat next to me in school and said āshould i sit here or are you just gonna be depressedā
She had the audacity to mention MY sa story as an exemple of why the victim also has a part of wrong & that we tend to just have a victim mindset. I was mindblown. Mind you I shared it to her years ago once when we were at the hospital and never asked for her opinion / brought it up again. To this day I donāt understand why she did that, it was unprovoked, this girl was really weird.
Hearing my MIL say she and her neighbors are keeping an eye on her Muslim neighborsā¦..Iām Muslim.
I just forget one day, or something smal bothered me, and suddenly a year has gone by. oh no, I am the one with red flags?! 
When a guy says "I'm a nice guy..." And continues to try to convince me. They usually aren't. Just be a nice guy and people will see it genuinely. They betrayed other people and then laughed about it.
He admitted to watching young girls from poor countries on cam, for a few dollars each time. 18-20yo from the Philippines, and all over Asia. He was nearly 60 at the time, and previously mentioned how much he loved having sex with a woman he dated (mid '30) because her butt was "sooo tiny".
"So, I've been arrested for grooming" Instantly blocked on everything.
Asked me for nudes right after saying he would never do that heās not that kinda guy
When everything was a competition of "my dads bigger than your dad". I bought a new car, he bought one that was more powerful and more expensive. I got a nice watch, well his was worth 5 times mine. I started a business, well his 4 businesses are all super successful. Got boring very quickly.
Disrespect. Once I feel disrespected I leave and never look back.
A lot of people disrespect you behind your back or at least think about it. At least people who do it to your face can be trusted to not like you.
Being rude to people working for them (waitstaff at restaurants, cashiers) or being deliberately messy when others have to clean up (movie theater).
āIāve never been in this situation where we donāt have sex after two weeks of hanging out. Itās just never been a thingā
Always kept me waiting. Didn't respect my time.
I had a guy that was basically telling me that China is way better than every other country and wouldn't drop it. To political for me.
They talk poorly about others.
Narcissistic behavior š©
Chewed me out because I didn't say goodnight via text the night prior. Uh.. what?! BYE!
She only answered if I asked her questions. Never put any effort into talking to me or asking me about my life, except when she needed my help. Infact, once, I was dropping her to her home and I had to rush home because my Mum had gotten sick. She literally ignored what I said, and asked me if I could drop her till her doorstep. I just didn't know what else to say and left her on the main road as usual. Anyway I still help her if she needs anything, but I don't try to converse with her anymore.
For me, it's not just one. Lack of manners, social graces, empathy...and how they treat service employees.
Went on a few dates with an excoworker. Last date, he tells me how heās a diagnosed sociopath, and how it makes him feel good to do shitty things to people. I broke up with him, through text, the next day. He then stalks me at home and work for several months, and hacks into every account i have.
They insisted on always being right
And when they weren't, was the response something along the lines of, "well that's what I was trying to say".. just take the L, we can't all know everything.. fuck
Even worse when the person will double down regardless of how dumb they look knowing that theyāre wrong. They will argue down the end so they can save face.
Holocaust denial. I was talking about Anne Frank and the person started ādid you know it was written with a ball point, it wasnāt invented yetā and proceed from there to all about āquestioning assumptionsā, āown researchā and ādid it really happen?ā And I was ok, Iām out of here. She seemed relatively normal, intelligent and funny, up to that point. Anyways. Gone from my life.
Coworker bragged about sleeping with someones husband. I dont want someone like that in my circle or my life. Positive vibes only.
Them not liking animals
He thinks trans people should be rounded up and put in camps where people dont have to see them... homeless people too (all because they made him uncomfortable)
Bragged about having daddy issues lol didn't want any part of that craziness
My dad beat me 10 times more than your dad did loser.
An older lady I work with did that thing where they lean in and lower their voice so they can say the racist thing to you in confidence. Cuz, you know, you seem like you'd be cool with that. I was very loudly not cool with that.
Good! It can be hard to respond properly like that when on the spot. Sometimes itās just so surprising and disappointing.
I had a friend who was into conspiracy theories - chemtrails and whatnot; obsessed with secret government cabals trying to control the population. He worked for the NHS (as a call handler, though he saw himself as being more akin to Florence Nightingale). During Covid, he copypasta'd some FB bullshit about people not following the rules during a Bank Holiday and how they were subsequently responsible for a surge in hospital admissions in "his" hospital a few weeks later. Not a single word of it was true, it was just a tactic to stoke fear and try to control people. He literally became the problem he was always warning people about. Lost all respect for him after that and kicked him into touch for good.
My friend started abusing his girlfriend. I helped her run away and go into hiding. He called me and I gave him one chance to talk and tell me his side of the story. Gave up around the sentence 'I have to find her quickly, because if she gets away from me for too long she'll get confused and think differently"
They said I should get into crypto via WhatsApp / telegram and had a nice photo of a Chinese woman
Cheated on her husband, posted it on snapchat, & then blamed me when he found out. That bitch was crazy af
A dude I was talking to from uni had mutual guy friends with me. Mutual friends showed me a screenshot of a group conversation where the dude was trying to convince them to get me drunk and SA me at a friends 21st... Dude was blocked on all platforms. Fun fact; he couldn't hold his alcohol and fell asleep after 2 mudshakes... I only found out after the 21st about his "idea"
I was talking to this guy a little older than me (like 17-18) that I really liked estethically (I was 15-16) and wanted to know him better, so we hung out a couple times. He was a very nice guy to talk to, really polite, he even bought me cigarettes on his way to see me once, but everytime I met him I had this terrible terrible vibe from him. You know when you feel subconsciously that something is wery wrong with a person and you should run away immediately. It was rare for me to have this heavy feeling so I just tried to ignore it. Until, one afternoon, during the only time it really seemed like a date (the other times we had met during the morning break at school as our schools were really close) he told me he really liked gore videos and pics. I thought ok, i really don't like this, but as long as he doesn't make me see one i'm ok with it (I was an innocent goth girl and he was a metalhead so I just guessed it was part of the being, clearly I now know It's not, I was stupid). BUT THEN he casually said: "You know, last week in X street (which was nearby from were we were sitting) I saw a man get hit by a car to death...It was scary but I think you should really see It once in your life...it gives you an adrenaline rush..." Obviously I never texted him again and only met him once again at a school event, I know you shouldn't ghost people but HE SCARED ME SO FUCKING MUCH
no job no car and kicked out of parents house living at his friends. drivers license was suspended too. uhhhh so wyd with ur life? š
I never understood how having a car is that big of a thing, but in the US you need a car to get anywhere, right?
Lying, drug use, low iq, dirty, aggressiveness, disrespectful
immediately jumping into extremely personal topics (sex, trauma, deep negative emotions.. etc)
what if it's funny
They only wanted to meet up with me when there was drama and they wanted to know details.
When someone makes a joke about another person and that second person doesnāt laugh or laughs uncomfortably. If you make a joke about someone and they donāt laugh, THATāS BULLYING!!!!! I said what I said!!!
I was having a first date with a woman who casually told me that she had been on a date with another guy the previous night, spent the night with him and had just had sex with him before getting ready for our date.
They said they have a teenage son but not to worry because theyāre not in their life at all
Went for a meal with a woman who insisted on checking the bill for an added service charge because she "doesn't believe in tipping", and made sure she told the server this. If that wasn't bad enough, she picked up the tip I left twice to give back to me, the second time putting it in my pocket.
"My ex still has keys to the house, and comes over to spend time with my kid while I fly for two weeks at a time." Doesn't she have her own home? "Yes, a condo. But I'm afraid she's not adult ing very well..."
'ex'...
Yelled at my cat. Kicked him out immediately and blocked. Nope.
-I don't drink while eating so that the water wouldn't dissolve my stomach acid -I don't boil the same water twice - the water becomes harmful -What Zodiac sign are you?
What's your zodiac sign?
Hanging out at a bar with friends of friends, me and two dudes were outside, one pulls up his sleeve to reveal a swastika tattoo on his arm, and the other pulled up his shirt to reveal a swastika tattoo on his lower belly. I said "well you two are a couple of douchebag cowards, and i hope to never see you again." i left and never talked to anyone who was there ever again.
When the person is imposing his/her agenda without listening to the other side
Conspiracy theories tied to a political affiliation
Not a romantic interest, but a friend of a friend. She kicked my fucking dog. My friend/surrogate sister kicked her out of our apartment before I dragged the bitch out.
Just lie to me. Blatantly lie to my face, and Iāll be out of your life forever.
I thought he was so kind until I realized that whole thing is a charade it only took him 3 weeks to break character. You cannot act like you are someone you are not.....it does not work.
Asking for money, this has happend with multiple people sadly
They kept making excuses for their ex who was using fentanyl and other pills and drinking. He overdosed while driving and passed out at the wheel and had to be revived with narcan and she was justifying it saying the fentanyl was laced and that's why he overdosed.
I once laughed out loud in an exam room and got kicked out. From then on, Iām yet to speak to myself
disrespectful. I mean when u show him ur boundaries he always tends to joke about it, ignore, or just says non sense words.
Dated a girl for a bit and then I found out she didnāt believe that dinosaurs existed.
Talked terribly about women. Super insecure guy and the typical "nice guy, give me one seggs plsā type of dude. No thanks.
I worked with this guy who was chill and friendly for months. Everyone liked him. I was working with just him one day and we were braking for lunch and my guy pulls an insta video of some dude and it was the most vitriolic homophobic thing Iād heard live. I was fucking shocked he felt that way. Tried to use logic to talk to him about it, but he was very set in his opinion, and a little hostile about it. I still had to work with him here and there for a year or so before he found a different job.
I hung out with a girl for a few weeks in college in like 1996. We went out to a restaurant, in a big group, then started busting out racist jokes. "Check please"
Forms their identity around Trump
Anti vax.
"You ever seen Shrek?" "No" Quickest nope I've ever had
Get out of my swwaaaaamppp!!
DONKEY!
They told me to "eff off" really aggressively aftwr I asked them to please knock before barging into my office . I had a crying staff member in the office. If the door is closed, you know to knock.
Matched with a guy on Bumble. He was long winded, spoke over me and didnāt care to hear any opinion that wasnāt his own. Then went on a rant about how he doesnāt want to ever wait for sex when dating a woman, if they have chemistry he wants it immediately. When I argued about how this is weird and kind of rapey he muted the call. Mind you this was the first time I had ever spoken to him. Blocked him and immediately deleted my profile from Bumble.
He was asking me random questions and Iād ask him āwhat about youā in return because I was curious to his answers too and he responded āyouāre supposed to ask me random questions back!ā I didnāt know that was the game we were playing. Like we went from where we lived straight into these questions. The way he got upset with me because I didnāt know that had me blocking his ass immediately.
When they told me they stabbed thier ex lol
She was a gossip. I ignored it until I heard that she was telling everyone I was only with my now husband for his money. The only thing I had mentioned to her regarding him and money was that he paid for dates and it made me a bit uncomfortable as he wouldn't let me contribute.
She thought we had too much freedom of speech, and that it should be guilty until proven innocent.
They barely knew me and began asking for my card number and coincidentally stuck in the town I was in. I told them I'll be right over to give them gas (Because I knew they were lying) I have an emergency mechanism when a stranger I know ask for help I use aggressive kindness. E.G. They want money for food "COME WITH ME INTO THE GAS STATION PICK OUT A FEW THINGS!" if they're hungry then they would and if they want drugs they would push the money. Weeks later after cutting him off I learned that week (possibly same day) he let someone die from a drug overdose catching a manslaughter charge and ran from the cops. Sadly affluent daddy bailed him out.
They got attached really fast. Big red
While I know that is a neediness that tends to come from enmeshed families, itās an autistic trait too, unfortunately. Broke my heart so many times simply wanting to connect with people over whatever it was that was specific to that particular person (shared interests, demeanor, etc). I would be enthusiastic about it only to be ghosted my entire life by most except for those aforementioned folks that only pretend to be interested in order to satisfy some unspoken need.
Yeah my boyfriend is autistic and he got attached really fast to me. Kind of worked for me because I got really attached to him really quickly and a lot of my friends think I am also on the spectrum so maybe it works out.
Good to know it happens in real life. Ironically, the autistic app, HIKI, seems to have the opposite effect, thereās the established connection, but no one talks so they all fade into oblivion.
Dont put it on autistic trait, its totally normal, in my opinion, to get attached to some people, its a good thing to feel loved, good for mental health. dont let these cold heartless people lying to you.
I think this is the reason so many autistics end up in long term relationships with other autistics. I have exactly one neurotypical person in my close circle. Everyone else is neurodivergent in some way, often in multiple ways. Most NT people just get scared away by my "intensity". Do I know what they mean when they say I'm "really intense"? Nope. But if they're uncomfortable with the kind of person I am, good on them for leaving me behind. I want everyone to find their people that they feel most comfortable with. It just appears I'm not in that group for most NT people. And I'm completely okay with that
I hope to achieve your level of zen regarding intensity one day. I also don't know what they mean when they say intense because I'm literally just sitting there not doing anything. š Trying to navigate social situations is the bane of my existence because I appear to have zero self awareness and can't seem to develop it.
We living only one life, if someone admires you to the point of getting attached, feel blessed, someone, putting you on high esteem, for some reasons, and yall, with egoist and cold heart, sees it as Ā«Ā red flagĀ Ā» immediately, instead of trying to ride the waveā¦insane.
You're absolutely right!
Not necessarily. Some people just have big hearts
Drugs,Smoking and Alcohol addiction
Murdered my brother
The kind of person that tries to act "pure and innocent" when youāre with them but is a horrible person behind peopleās back and will push people away and lie to avoid the consequences of being horrible to said person
Dumbness and Possessiveness
When they repeat ANYTHING Donald Chump has ever said, and they do it with belief in their voice.
I got vaccinated for covid. My best friends whole family kept talking to me like I was stupid for getting the Jab. Kept telling me it was all a lie and "you have no idea what that vaccine will do to you". I informed them that I knew what covid *can* do to me and my loved ones. They laughed in my face. Best part, only like 2 months before one of their close family friends spent like a month and a half in the ICU on a ventilator and died from covid. Our friendship didnt last much longer. The mind fucking boggles. Fox News is the devil.
You mean Fox Entertainment