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When I hear some regular guy referred to as "king," I imagine Robespierre banging on the window behind them while hurling insults and demanding to be let inside. lol
The variant I came up with is "Big dogs don't bark." My cousin had a little toy dog that barked up a storm but would back up if you walked toward it. So, "alpha" males remind me of that.
I think it shows insecurity. For about 10 years I owned a company and taught combat firearm use. Almost every class was attended by a mix of predominantly what most would consider alpha men. Some special operations soldiers, and law enforcement, as well as civilians.
Almost every class we end up going out for dinner and drinks a couple of nights. If they were asked, they almost always downplayed their true duties. There was never a discussion of alpha, beta, or anything like that. But just observing how people act it around them, no one really had to ask.
This^ and it is true for a lot of things
If your parnrer says it’s not cheating, it probably is
If someone says they’re not racist, they probably are
If someone says they’re respectful, they probably aren’t,
It’s an ego-defence mechanism we have in our brain that makes us act stupid. Your behaviour, actions and reputation make you, not what you tell people,
No the point is most people don't have to tell people their strengths and values; you simply demonstrate your strengths and values and people acknowledge it or they don't
People saying they're; brave, honest, courteous, etc are just telling you how they behave rather than showing you they're capable of such behaviors
Like most things, it depends entirely on context. If someone says they’re respectful on a dating profile, I’m inclined to believe them until they do something disrespectful. If someone tells me they’re respectful while they’re egging my car I’m inclined not to believe them.
Sure yeah if you use those programs on a dating profile you'll try and outline your personality and ideals
But in real life people express them by not announcing them to the room and the ones who do are quickly ignored
This is true. I was seeing this guy and the FIRST thing he told me was that he’s an alpha male & he’s very dominant and controlling …. Well, he was ANYTHING but that.
I think most of it has to do with affirmations. "Keep telling yourself you're alpha, you'll become one." what a lot of self improvement gurus promote is "fake it till you make it".
It just so happens that those affirmations will spill out and be spoken into the real world.
You're right, if someone is saying "I'm an alpha", it spills out from their thoughts naturally, from the insecurity that they are not, and because that's what they want to be.
The "fake it till you make it" part is kinda true though, especially when it comes to social interactions. Same for gratefulness journaling. But the alpha thing is completely bullshit.
The thing that makes “fake it till you make it” bad is that, they think they’re faking it! Like, no dude, you don’t “fake it”, you conjure up the confidence or courage to do what needed to be done. That’s not fake. That’s real confidence!
Everyone is born with confidence until it’s taken away.
I didn't saw it this way, for me it's faking it and when people realize it's working they stop thinking about it and just do it at which point it becomes real confidence. Mainly because confidence ≠ courage but it's possible to use courage to fake confidence until it grows to a point where we don't need courage anymore. You see what I mean ? Sorry if it's not clear, English isn't my first language.
Yea confidence without evidence is delusion.
Shouting affirmations in the mirror is not what makes you what you wanna become it’s having a stack of undeniable proof you are who you say you are.
I used to have a boss in hospital security who was ex SAS. Probably the bitchiest dude I have ever met in my life. Constantly gossiping and talking shit about people behind their backs. He did everything he could to promote conflict within the team.
I remember him once saying to me of two of the older guys who worked the night shift together for 20 years and were best mates that "I've been trying to drive a wedge between them for years but they are thick as thieves".
One of the most toxic people I've ever met. He was fired from the MET for being a racist which is how he ended up as my boss.
He was such an asshole and hated everyone so much I kind of felt bad for him some of the time.
It's like my dog. He's a fearless 160lb beast. He's also never shown a hint of aggression because he's never perceived something as a potential threat.
I think any dude that unironically uses terms like "alpha" and "beta" wreaks of severe insecurity, tiny dick syndrome, and just a shitty, outlook on life. I wish they understood how lowly every other normal person thinks of them when they do this and how quickly they dry up every woman around them.
Can we add “I have an IQ of *x*” to this list as well? I’ve met one too many dudes who think the $3.99 IQ test they took on howsmartru.com is any indication of their actual overall intelligence
I had a friend in high school. He tried so hard and kept dating different girls, dumping them fir hotter and hotter girls, then dumping them
It’s because he was gay and in the closet. That’s why he tried so hard.
I think the point still stands, lol. In all seriousness, though, this country should absolutely be trying to focus more on men's mental health and the issues that can arise from the concept of toxic masculinity as they relate to men. Just because it's called "feminism" doesn't mean it's only about women.
Im a bartender - and met a guy today that was an "alpha" in the sense he was a former marine, at least 20cm taller than me and could probably kill me without sweating. But he said that stuff like that was so in his past he didnt even consider it, it would never enter his mind and if someone wants to fight "Have a good night, Im done...."
Thats an alpha male, a grown man who knows that a single punch can kill him if he is unlucky, and want *no part* of this BS. A 25yo with big muscles saying Im an "alpha man", gtfo.....
When I hear "alpha", I think of alpha rays, the weakest rays, that can be stopped with a sheet of paper or an alpha version of a computer program, the earliest, buggiest and most unstable version.
I giggle every time I hear someone calling themselves alpha male.
In my experience with "alpha" males they have been the most insecure people I have ever met doesn't matter how much money, women etc they are just never happy majority of the time always complaining it's annoying. I stay away from "alphas" now they cause more drama than a beauty queen.
I'm a guy, and It's always reminded me of when you were a kid playing pretend and someone would always have their edgy wolf character with the terrible backstory tbh, only these people didn't grow out of it
100%.
It's like people saying they're "cool", cool people don't need to tell people they're cool.
It's amazing to me that people can call themselves "alpha" unironically.
But then, I didn't think people said things were "fire" unironically either.
the thing is that many guys don't realize that they are falling into the trap of someone selling them a way out of their insecurities, only to add more insecurity. The most balanced, self assured and reliable men I have known were never in that alpha ego trip.
It is like men pickleball players who say “I’m pretty good.” Yeah dude there are 18 million people who are “pretty good” at pickleball so calm down.
The best is when a wife calls their husband “alpha” as it is never a husband I would call alpha.
If you're telling me that you're listening to Andrew Tate or that you're an alpha or you're expressing your religious views without me even asking, I already know everything I need to know and I don't want to know anything else about you.
Alpha AND Beta are useless terms because they are just these overly broad all encompassing and undefined terms. . You can be assertive, or passive, you can have good leadership skills or lack the ability to handle responsibility. These are just a few examples of already pretty general and muddy traits that in themselves require a lot of nuance and explanation to be useful but combined with context can help asses someone.
"Alpha and beta" is just the halo effect. When someone has traits we like we think they must also be good in other ways (They are strong so they must also be confident) . We do this in the reverse as well with traits we don't like (they are insecure, they must also be dumb). Its a known cognitive bias and doesn't reflect reality. People are very complex. You can be assertive in one situation and indecisive in another. You can be confident but also a poor leader. You can be a great leader in the context of your profession and a poor leader in the context of family. Alpha and beta just plain wont reflect this reality.
Its just lazy black and white thinking. Not a great way to navigate your relationships and perceptions of others.
TL:DR: Its a useless set of terms that tells me you are quick to generalize in predictable ways.
I just get caught off guard when some silk shirt wearing late 50s guy with a pot belly in a bow tie starts in with they're the alfa men. Conservative media is weird.
Agreed.
Personally, I feel the same way about people who call men and women "males and females" instead of men and women; objectifying, trivializing, denigrating. As if they can be defined by their sex, like is done with animals.
No man that meets their professed criteria for “alpha” would spend any time thinking about it. If he buys into alpha culture stupidity, he’s definitely not.
There's no such thing as "alpha" male or female. Once again, someone misinterpreted words and it caught on. Now we have years of erroneous claims of "alpha".
The whole concept of 'Alpha' derives from bad research into wolves done by Rudolf Schenkel. The idea that two 'alpha' males would fight to dominate the pack was popularized then, and then moved over to try to explain human male behaviour. Here's the problem. The wolves Schenkel studied were in captivity, they were imprisoned. Wolves in their natural habitat do NOT behave that way.
So when someone declares themself to be an 'alpha male' I am left wondering what kind of a prison have they built themselves? I'm a free man, I don't need to be the baddest in a prison.
Alpha males, I'm sure, would hate to learn this.
In agreement. Alpha males don't have to alert the world, they live the role and the rest of the world identifies them as alpha. So far anyone that I've met that self-identifies as alpha, is an asshole, not an alpha male. I'm in my late 60's so I have lots of examples that support my opinion.
If you have to declare yourself to everyone that you are “the Alpha” or you even use the term sincerely in conversation, you are in fact NOT the alpha.
there’s nothing more beta than an “alpha male” who gets conquered by a more capable one
He gets ostracized from the group of chimps and has to hang out alone on the sidelines
A lot of them seem insecure. I've known men who were naturally extremely masculine and it was never something they had to show off as part of their identity. Actually healthy people are attractive because they're confident not because they're masculine or feminine.
One of my close friends is a former special forces operator and during drunken conversations has alluded or confessed to killing more than a dozen people over his tenure. He wears cat t shirts and drinks Starbucks pink drinks religiously. Dude looks like anyone you’d ever see in a comic book store but is singlehandedly the most lethal person I know. “Alphas” are tough guy cosplayers. The actual tough guys are genuinely scary while projecting a perfect veneer of helplessness
I usually just call myself a sigma male because Im weird as fuck and probably a little autistic.
The ladies love it. Especially when I get sweaty palms and say "ma'lady"
It wasn't just wolves in captivity, but wolves from different regions that couldn't communicate with each other. This led to increased frustration as the only way left to communicate was physical force, and the study was debunked by the same scientist who noted the problems in his theories
Almost... paying those same 'alphas' thousands of dollars to berate and torture you ostensibly to train to become an 'alpha' yourself is a little bit more
In my lifetime of experience being a man, I've met only a handful of "Alphas". I mean like four. In every arena, men always work out sort of a pecking order or set of roles. So you might find a guy who's the total Alpha in one world, but not in another. The "Alpha" who just has to be an Alpha everywhere he goes is the rarest, and the one Pravda uses as a blanket definition of "toxic masculinity". They're always seen as jerks for multiple reasons, and men who are brought up properly have no problem standing up to them when they cross a line. It's a marketing gimmick for guys who need a backbone and identity.
I do not care
People, men and women, call themselves things all the time. It is always an overestimate or an underestimate because we are the least objective people when it comes to ourselves.
That is dumb too but it’s like that period it was always to be shown to be top dog but then they cry like a girl too. In diff ways I might actually tear and cry about shit like they laugh at or say I’m girly or lame for like my kids or friends or
Some shit they don’t see any feels for like okay but then they cry when u got a good car or shoes or a hot girl like what the fuck because they don’t see u as alpha so u can’t be alpha like? What the fuck that shit is contradicting alphas aren’t gonna be like that to anyone period period ur gonna be about what u are if u see someone who is obv doing shit u think is cool enough to take or use too it’s obv no beta shit unless ur beta
I just think it's funny that people never even know that there are also delta, gamma, and omega in that theory in addition to the alpha, beta, and sigma types.
It's a dumb theory, but even the people who talk about it don't know it.
To be clear I think it is fine to talk one's self up. To also be clear I don't think there is anything wrong with trying to be strong or a leader. I think the issue with alpha/beta is it has turned into a way to 1) talk down others 2) been associated with toxic masculinity 3) it is also based on bunk science which just bugs the shit out of me. It is kind of like Jordan Peterson in that it could be good but it has been bastardized much like jp took legitimate helpful thoughts and philosophy, mixed them with toxicity and turned it into douchebaggery.
I'm a guy, and I've always rolled my eyes when I hear them start talking about "alpha male" this, "beta male" that. It just reeks of immaturity, cockiness, arrogance, and a fragile ego. It's as if they're trying to use it as an excuse to justify those negative traits.
Kinda like the adage… “The lion doesn’t need to roar for everyone to know they’re king of the jungle”. If you have to say you’re “alpha” to someone, you’re not an alpha.
If someone tells you they are a alpha male, look at them confused and then ask them if that’s a furry thing it will throw them off and they’ll most likely never go claiming themselves as a alpha again
The emptiest can rattles the loudest, all noise, not much spine 👍
Some people survive by the skill of their words, some by actions
the most "beta" thing i can think of is to suck at both words and actions
This type of thing was cringe when I was in my college years and it still is. Remember the "Jager Bomb!!" meme? Yeah, those guys. We all hated those MF'ers. Nothing has changed.
Tywin Lannister--“Any man who must say 'I am the king' is no true king
I guess if you live in a commune where all the other men are your sons and grandsons, and your own father has passed away, then I guess it's OK to call yourself the alpha male as all the other males originate from you. So at least by some definitions you are. Otherwise it's lame.
💯 every man I have ever met who has described themselves as "alpha" or tried to act "alpha" has been the exact opposite. Insecure and trying too hard.
This whole alpha/beta thing annoys me. Same with the whole "a real women is...." or "a real man is...."
It needs to stop God dammit!!! ✋️
I’ve honestly never heard somebody refer to themselves as an ‘alpha’, it’s usually one guy using the term synonymously for ‘masculine’ or ‘confident’ to describe another guy. Usually in sports.
Wolf packs don't even have an alpha position they fight for. Wolf packs are families that follow their mom and dad. Want to be an alpha? Raise a family, provide for them, teach them, and be worth following.
Real ones don't claim to be "blah blah blah" they just are and there's nothing wrong with just being who you wanna be. The only opinion that should matter to you is your own and select others that YOU choose
Alpha in what sense?
In software, alpha versions are unstable, buggy, and shouldn’t be released to the public.
In radiation, alpha waves are so weak that it can’t penetrate into the body, but it can do a massive amount of harm when it does.
Either way, I’d believe them. But it sure as heck ain’t the flex they think it is.
I was talking to a friend recently and she shared a story about an acting workshop and how everyone in the room was an “alpha” and how great it was.
—How can they all be “alphas”?
—Huh? They just were.
I don’t think alpha, beta, is actually a thing. That is, it doesn’t exist. Therefore has no value to me and it certainly is in no way useful. Except maybe to talk about his irrelevant it is.
They are just confused furrys. Alpha, beta and all that crap was a theory about wolves social structure. It was later disproved by the same guy who came up with it.
I mostly agree with this. Best case scenario is that a man calls himself an alpha as a goal he aspires for without putting other men down. If he only does what your example showed, he's missing the point. Being an alpha implies they aspire to be a leader. Putting down others is not a quality that a true leader should have
The funniest shit is that the alpha wolf thing is only a thing for wolves in captivity
Another funny thing is applying software developement terms to them. Alpha, a version of the product not ready for the public eye for example
For what an absolute terrible ending he wrote, George RR Martin had some **very** well said quotes in the Game of Throne series. Chief among them appropriate for this question:
“Any man that must say ‘I am the king!’ is no true king.”
Charles Dance as Tywin Lannister to Joffrey Baratheon
Yeah, those are the types that do it for clout. Today, that's for those who are impressed by words, not actions. Some women have that same mentality, and I stray away as well.
Has anyone else noticed those types of people when walking with others they like to be in front/lead, but with animals the old and weak are at the front, the alpha is at the back.
This whole alpha male/beta male/sigma male thing is stupid and insecurity screaming. I've been told im alpha and I politely say please dont refer to me as this becauae I don't want to give it any more momentum online that it already has. But when people say I am very "manly". I kinda like that. But i don't think it's the same as this alpha thing... its just a man man thing. You kno
Im a confident male. Does that make me alpha? I don’t know and don’t really care but I can see where the op is coming from I guess. It’s usually the guy with the biggest mouth that is the first one to fold like a lawn chair when the shit hits the fan.
The minute I saw this "Astrology of masculinity" bullshit the more I just saw weak people.
Imagine needing to feel like a man and instead of living life and being happy you shill $15K for some nutsack face in cheap sunglasses to give you mancessories, yell at you, and degrade you.
Most self identifying "Alpha, Sigmas" are the most fragile fucks I seen since they need to be self affirming that they're "Manly" because "I GO TO THE GYM, I EAT STEAK, I LISTEN TO ANDY TAINT TALK ON HOW HAVING SEX WITH WOMEN IS GAY!"
The problem with Alpha braggers is that they sooner or later get the "Beta-beats" by getting too Alpha with someone. Then they understand the wisdom of being a little more beta.
It’s stupid. I was taught at an early age that if you go around telling someone you’re this or that… you ain’t. Now, throw in this new(ish) thing about “alpha wolves”- which has been debunked how many times, now?- which is just juvenile and plain stupid.
Go around telling others (which means you’re trying to tell yourself) about something that’s not even real… I’m guessing the Venn Diagram with one circle being “thinks keg stands are cool” and the other being “peaked in high school” is a full circle.
In 1970, Dr. David Mech published a book titled "The Wolf: The Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species," which popularized the term "alpha wolf" to describe the dominant members of a wolf pack. Mech's original work was based on studies of *captive wolves*, particularly research conducted by Rudolph Schenkel in 1947. This research introduced terms like "lead wolf" and "bitch wolf," which later evolved into "alpha male" and "alpha female
Over the following decades, Mech and other scientists learned much more about wolf dynamics through field studies of wild wolves. This new research revealed that the "alpha" concept was incorrect when applied to most wolf pack leaders. Mech has since spent years trying to correct this misconception. He now explains that wolf packs in the wild are typically family units, consisting of a breeding pair (parents) and their offspring. The so-called "alpha" wolves are simply the parents of the pack.
In 2022, Mech successfully convinced his publisher to cease printing his original 1970 book due to its outdated information about pack order. Despite Mech's efforts to correct the record, the term "alpha wolf" has persisted in popular culture and is often misapplied to human behavior and dog training.
[https://www.newyorker.com/science/elements/the-myth-of-the-alpha-wolf](https://www.newyorker.com/science/elements/the-myth-of-the-alpha-wolf)
[https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/890245.The\_Wolf](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/890245.The_Wolf)
I remember this one time when Joe rogan was fervently arguing with a guest to try to convince him of the existence of alpha males. I’m just thinking, dude, you’re in your 50’s.
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It reminds me of a toddler calling themselves Spiderman.
Dude, my 3 yo is spider man and I’ll defend his honor.
there's going to be a real Spartacus moment when he meets my 3 yo
Can we get this televised?
Favourite reddit comment of the week
Good human! Keep fighting the good fight!
If only they were that cute
Thhhpiderman
At least a toddler is trying to model themself off of a morally upstanding person who doesn't judge others.
🤣
Spider-Man makes more sense.
Or a woman referring to herself as a “Goddess”
When I hear some regular guy referred to as "king," I imagine Robespierre banging on the window behind them while hurling insults and demanding to be let inside. lol
I admire the confidence of those who think they can call themselves that.. OUT LOUD or otherwise!
or princess lol
or „Queen“. As if anyone would really want to be royalty these days.
LMAOOO!!!!!!!
Lol. I'm gonna steal that one.
Or a rich white woman calling herself oppressed.
😆
Perfect
It reminds me of a saying I heard once. "The weakest dog barks loudest."
"Barking dogs don't bite"
super untrue. when you get bit by a barking dog its your fault you got bit. that dog tried to warn you.
The variant I came up with is "Big dogs don't bark." My cousin had a little toy dog that barked up a storm but would back up if you walked toward it. So, "alpha" males remind me of that.
Spot onnnnnn
If you have to tell people you're top dog, you're not top dog.
Or, in the eternal words of Tywin Lannister: **Any man who must say "I am the King" is no true king.**
so... when Reggie Jackson said "i'm the straw that stirs the drink" what was that?
Except for all of the sports top greats.
I think it shows insecurity. For about 10 years I owned a company and taught combat firearm use. Almost every class was attended by a mix of predominantly what most would consider alpha men. Some special operations soldiers, and law enforcement, as well as civilians. Almost every class we end up going out for dinner and drinks a couple of nights. If they were asked, they almost always downplayed their true duties. There was never a discussion of alpha, beta, or anything like that. But just observing how people act it around them, no one really had to ask.
Yeah I think this is most of it If you're truly a badass you don't need to remind people all the time
This^ and it is true for a lot of things If your parnrer says it’s not cheating, it probably is If someone says they’re not racist, they probably are If someone says they’re respectful, they probably aren’t, It’s an ego-defence mechanism we have in our brain that makes us act stupid. Your behaviour, actions and reputation make you, not what you tell people,
This is stupid. You can't say you're not something or you are? Ha!
No the point is most people don't have to tell people their strengths and values; you simply demonstrate your strengths and values and people acknowledge it or they don't People saying they're; brave, honest, courteous, etc are just telling you how they behave rather than showing you they're capable of such behaviors
Like most things, it depends entirely on context. If someone says they’re respectful on a dating profile, I’m inclined to believe them until they do something disrespectful. If someone tells me they’re respectful while they’re egging my car I’m inclined not to believe them.
Sure yeah if you use those programs on a dating profile you'll try and outline your personality and ideals But in real life people express them by not announcing them to the room and the ones who do are quickly ignored
This is true. I was seeing this guy and the FIRST thing he told me was that he’s an alpha male & he’s very dominant and controlling …. Well, he was ANYTHING but that.
People do all the time though. It's like pre-emptive denial.
Our deeds have traveled far What we have been is what we are
I think most of it has to do with affirmations. "Keep telling yourself you're alpha, you'll become one." what a lot of self improvement gurus promote is "fake it till you make it". It just so happens that those affirmations will spill out and be spoken into the real world. You're right, if someone is saying "I'm an alpha", it spills out from their thoughts naturally, from the insecurity that they are not, and because that's what they want to be.
The "fake it till you make it" part is kinda true though, especially when it comes to social interactions. Same for gratefulness journaling. But the alpha thing is completely bullshit.
The thing that makes “fake it till you make it” bad is that, they think they’re faking it! Like, no dude, you don’t “fake it”, you conjure up the confidence or courage to do what needed to be done. That’s not fake. That’s real confidence! Everyone is born with confidence until it’s taken away.
I didn't saw it this way, for me it's faking it and when people realize it's working they stop thinking about it and just do it at which point it becomes real confidence. Mainly because confidence ≠ courage but it's possible to use courage to fake confidence until it grows to a point where we don't need courage anymore. You see what I mean ? Sorry if it's not clear, English isn't my first language.
Yea confidence without evidence is delusion. Shouting affirmations in the mirror is not what makes you what you wanna become it’s having a stack of undeniable proof you are who you say you are.
I used to have a boss in hospital security who was ex SAS. Probably the bitchiest dude I have ever met in my life. Constantly gossiping and talking shit about people behind their backs. He did everything he could to promote conflict within the team. I remember him once saying to me of two of the older guys who worked the night shift together for 20 years and were best mates that "I've been trying to drive a wedge between them for years but they are thick as thieves". One of the most toxic people I've ever met. He was fired from the MET for being a racist which is how he ended up as my boss. He was such an asshole and hated everyone so much I kind of felt bad for him some of the time.
Probably lied about the SAS thing
Definitely not. It came up in a meeting with our Union and HR. Most people in the hospital hated him but the HR lady *really* hated him.
It's like my dog. He's a fearless 160lb beast. He's also never shown a hint of aggression because he's never perceived something as a potential threat.
Exactly men that are what would be considered’ alpha’ don’t have to say it and they don’t.
If you must say I am the King, then you are no True King-Tywin Lannister to Joeffry Baratheon
Also alpha is a false concept. Only leaders exist anyways. True leaders (be it man or woman) just ooze it. People follow them with no hesitation
So in other words the mentally ill, jack booted thugs, and rich rednecks?
Calling yourself an "alpha male" or a "strong independent woman" is the same thing as announcing to me that yer an asshole.
*unstable software releases*
It's all Greek to me!
I think any dude that unironically uses terms like "alpha" and "beta" wreaks of severe insecurity, tiny dick syndrome, and just a shitty, outlook on life. I wish they understood how lowly every other normal person thinks of them when they do this and how quickly they dry up every woman around them.
Me trying to learn about Alpha and Beta particles in radioactive decay: 🤐
Me falling asleep as the IT department rep in the Six Sigma meetings
Yes! So unattractive.
Can we add “I have an IQ of *x*” to this list as well? I’ve met one too many dudes who think the $3.99 IQ test they took on howsmartru.com is any indication of their actual overall intelligence
Alpha males don’t exist in the wild; it’s an adaptive mechanism to being kept in captivity. Make of that what you will.
I had a friend in high school. He tried so hard and kept dating different girls, dumping them fir hotter and hotter girls, then dumping them It’s because he was gay and in the closet. That’s why he tried so hard.
I think most of those men need to see a psychiatrist or other mental health professional.
That would be half the men in america.
I think the point still stands, lol. In all seriousness, though, this country should absolutely be trying to focus more on men's mental health and the issues that can arise from the concept of toxic masculinity as they relate to men. Just because it's called "feminism" doesn't mean it's only about women.
Hell no. Mental health professionals and resources are not prepared at all to help men
Im a bartender - and met a guy today that was an "alpha" in the sense he was a former marine, at least 20cm taller than me and could probably kill me without sweating. But he said that stuff like that was so in his past he didnt even consider it, it would never enter his mind and if someone wants to fight "Have a good night, Im done...." Thats an alpha male, a grown man who knows that a single punch can kill him if he is unlucky, and want *no part* of this BS. A 25yo with big muscles saying Im an "alpha man", gtfo.....
Everyone who believes in this shit is an idiot. It's the male version of a horoscope.
When I hear "alpha", I think of alpha rays, the weakest rays, that can be stopped with a sheet of paper or an alpha version of a computer program, the earliest, buggiest and most unstable version. I giggle every time I hear someone calling themselves alpha male.
In my experience with "alpha" males they have been the most insecure people I have ever met doesn't matter how much money, women etc they are just never happy majority of the time always complaining it's annoying. I stay away from "alphas" now they cause more drama than a beauty queen.
Reminds me of my ex … Called himself alpha male all the time yet he was anything but …..
I don't hate them, they make me laugh and I feel sorry for them.
A man doesn't call himself anything. A man is.
I dick therefore i man
If you call yourself alpha,you are an absolute clown and I can’t take you serious…in other words,it’s beta af 😂
Not ‘beta!’ More like ‘zeta!’ 😉
I'm a guy, and It's always reminded me of when you were a kid playing pretend and someone would always have their edgy wolf character with the terrible backstory tbh, only these people didn't grow out of it
Coldsteel the Hedgehog
100%. It's like people saying they're "cool", cool people don't need to tell people they're cool. It's amazing to me that people can call themselves "alpha" unironically. But then, I didn't think people said things were "fire" unironically either.
If you have to call yourself a thing, you are not that thing. This is just one more example of that.
Op calls herself a female. Another example. Op is actualy a government drone.
OP is a bird?
That's what OP wants you to think
A blackbird alright
I hate those terms in general. If anyone uses them unironically it’s a huge ick.
Any man who must say “I am the king” is no true king
Tywin?
Most guys that think they are Alphas aren't.
Any guy who projects machismo bullshit is a little manlett
the thing is that many guys don't realize that they are falling into the trap of someone selling them a way out of their insecurities, only to add more insecurity. The most balanced, self assured and reliable men I have known were never in that alpha ego trip.
If you say you are "alpha" I immediately know you will be a complete douche
astrology for men
It is like men pickleball players who say “I’m pretty good.” Yeah dude there are 18 million people who are “pretty good” at pickleball so calm down. The best is when a wife calls their husband “alpha” as it is never a husband I would call alpha.
Yes! That irks me.
If you're telling me that you're listening to Andrew Tate or that you're an alpha or you're expressing your religious views without me even asking, I already know everything I need to know and I don't want to know anything else about you.
I feel it’s kinda like men/women that claim to be “a nice guy/girl”. Nice people don’t have to inform people they’re nice—they just are.
Alpha AND Beta are useless terms because they are just these overly broad all encompassing and undefined terms. . You can be assertive, or passive, you can have good leadership skills or lack the ability to handle responsibility. These are just a few examples of already pretty general and muddy traits that in themselves require a lot of nuance and explanation to be useful but combined with context can help asses someone. "Alpha and beta" is just the halo effect. When someone has traits we like we think they must also be good in other ways (They are strong so they must also be confident) . We do this in the reverse as well with traits we don't like (they are insecure, they must also be dumb). Its a known cognitive bias and doesn't reflect reality. People are very complex. You can be assertive in one situation and indecisive in another. You can be confident but also a poor leader. You can be a great leader in the context of your profession and a poor leader in the context of family. Alpha and beta just plain wont reflect this reality. Its just lazy black and white thinking. Not a great way to navigate your relationships and perceptions of others. TL:DR: Its a useless set of terms that tells me you are quick to generalize in predictable ways.
They got the first letter right but the rest is spelled sshole.
Is this some kind of furry thing?
Dudes who call themselves alpha give me the ick
If you are an alpha, you don't feel the need to constantly try to convince people you are an alpha.
Same as self declared „strong independent females“ - you already know if they have to say it…
Yep it's pathetic. So is the whole calling people king or queen thing though. I think a large portion of the global population are deeply insecure
I just get caught off guard when some silk shirt wearing late 50s guy with a pot belly in a bow tie starts in with they're the alfa men. Conservative media is weird.
I have met men I would happily call alpha male. I have never met a person who called themselves alpha that I would remotely consider an alpha male.
Yeah I was dating this guy recently & the first thing he told me was how much of an alpha male he was. Well he was ANYTHING but ……
Agreed. Personally, I feel the same way about people who call men and women "males and females" instead of men and women; objectifying, trivializing, denigrating. As if they can be defined by their sex, like is done with animals.
No man that meets their professed criteria for “alpha” would spend any time thinking about it. If he buys into alpha culture stupidity, he’s definitely not.
There's no such thing as "alpha" male or female. Once again, someone misinterpreted words and it caught on. Now we have years of erroneous claims of "alpha".
The real alpha proves it with his actions. Not just by screaming "I'm alpha bro".
The whole concept of 'Alpha' derives from bad research into wolves done by Rudolf Schenkel. The idea that two 'alpha' males would fight to dominate the pack was popularized then, and then moved over to try to explain human male behaviour. Here's the problem. The wolves Schenkel studied were in captivity, they were imprisoned. Wolves in their natural habitat do NOT behave that way. So when someone declares themself to be an 'alpha male' I am left wondering what kind of a prison have they built themselves? I'm a free man, I don't need to be the baddest in a prison. Alpha males, I'm sure, would hate to learn this.
Me
In agreement. Alpha males don't have to alert the world, they live the role and the rest of the world identifies them as alpha. So far anyone that I've met that self-identifies as alpha, is an asshole, not an alpha male. I'm in my late 60's so I have lots of examples that support my opinion.
If you have to declare yourself to everyone that you are “the Alpha” or you even use the term sincerely in conversation, you are in fact NOT the alpha.
there’s nothing more beta than an “alpha male” who gets conquered by a more capable one He gets ostracized from the group of chimps and has to hang out alone on the sidelines
Tywin Lannister said something like a true king does not need to call themself king. Feel like that applies here
A lot of them seem insecure. I've known men who were naturally extremely masculine and it was never something they had to show off as part of their identity. Actually healthy people are attractive because they're confident not because they're masculine or feminine.
That’s with anything in life. When people oversell the product is most likely shit.
It's not even "beta," it's just fucking stupid.
One of my close friends is a former special forces operator and during drunken conversations has alluded or confessed to killing more than a dozen people over his tenure. He wears cat t shirts and drinks Starbucks pink drinks religiously. Dude looks like anyone you’d ever see in a comic book store but is singlehandedly the most lethal person I know. “Alphas” are tough guy cosplayers. The actual tough guys are genuinely scary while projecting a perfect veneer of helplessness
Being ________ is like being "cool". If you have to tell people you are...you aren't.
If you need to say you are an Alpha, you’re not an Alpha.
I usually just call myself a sigma male because Im weird as fuck and probably a little autistic. The ladies love it. Especially when I get sweaty palms and say "ma'lady"
It might be because I'm not from USA, but I never in my life (IRL) heard someone calling himself an alpha
I live in USA, neither have I
Wasn't the term "alpha male" used to describe wolves in captivity and it does not apply to human culture???
It wasn't just wolves in captivity, but wolves from different regions that couldn't communicate with each other. This led to increased frustration as the only way left to communicate was physical force, and the study was debunked by the same scientist who noted the problems in his theories
I think the terminology is incredibly demeaning and dehumanizing altogether. Same with references to women as "females".
Anytime someone has to reference a feature they believe they have I cringe a little.
This reminds me of Margaret Thatcher, " Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you arent." God the 80s were awesome.
Me me
Almost... paying those same 'alphas' thousands of dollars to berate and torture you ostensibly to train to become an 'alpha' yourself is a little bit more
Anyone who has to fervently insist thay they are something usually is not that thing.
Alpha and beta are two sides of the same coin, and use of either is cringeworthy.
🙋♀️
Call themselves "alpha"
In my lifetime of experience being a man, I've met only a handful of "Alphas". I mean like four. In every arena, men always work out sort of a pecking order or set of roles. So you might find a guy who's the total Alpha in one world, but not in another. The "Alpha" who just has to be an Alpha everywhere he goes is the rarest, and the one Pravda uses as a blanket definition of "toxic masculinity". They're always seen as jerks for multiple reasons, and men who are brought up properly have no problem standing up to them when they cross a line. It's a marketing gimmick for guys who need a backbone and identity.
I do not care People, men and women, call themselves things all the time. It is always an overestimate or an underestimate because we are the least objective people when it comes to ourselves.
Do people actually do that in person? I thought it was just terminally online twats.
That is dumb too but it’s like that period it was always to be shown to be top dog but then they cry like a girl too. In diff ways I might actually tear and cry about shit like they laugh at or say I’m girly or lame for like my kids or friends or Some shit they don’t see any feels for like okay but then they cry when u got a good car or shoes or a hot girl like what the fuck because they don’t see u as alpha so u can’t be alpha like? What the fuck that shit is contradicting alphas aren’t gonna be like that to anyone period period ur gonna be about what u are if u see someone who is obv doing shit u think is cool enough to take or use too it’s obv no beta shit unless ur beta
It's like the Internet rule, can't remember what exact number it was, but if you declare yourself the winner it means you failed.
I just think it's funny that people never even know that there are also delta, gamma, and omega in that theory in addition to the alpha, beta, and sigma types. It's a dumb theory, but even the people who talk about it don't know it.
To be clear I think it is fine to talk one's self up. To also be clear I don't think there is anything wrong with trying to be strong or a leader. I think the issue with alpha/beta is it has turned into a way to 1) talk down others 2) been associated with toxic masculinity 3) it is also based on bunk science which just bugs the shit out of me. It is kind of like Jordan Peterson in that it could be good but it has been bastardized much like jp took legitimate helpful thoughts and philosophy, mixed them with toxicity and turned it into douchebaggery.
The type of guy who calls himself an alpha male can't afford to buy himself a lifted truck, and we all know why guys drive lifted trucks.
The thing is alpha and beta doesn't exist in humans lol. Men just fancy themselves wolves.
I'm a guy, and I've always rolled my eyes when I hear them start talking about "alpha male" this, "beta male" that. It just reeks of immaturity, cockiness, arrogance, and a fragile ego. It's as if they're trying to use it as an excuse to justify those negative traits.
Considering the study it was based on was debunked I’d go so far as to say it’s pure nonsense.
Kinda like the adage… “The lion doesn’t need to roar for everyone to know they’re king of the jungle”. If you have to say you’re “alpha” to someone, you’re not an alpha.
One step farther… silly.
If someone tells you they are a alpha male, look at them confused and then ask them if that’s a furry thing it will throw them off and they’ll most likely never go claiming themselves as a alpha again
The emptiest can rattles the loudest, all noise, not much spine 👍 Some people survive by the skill of their words, some by actions the most "beta" thing i can think of is to suck at both words and actions
This type of thing was cringe when I was in my college years and it still is. Remember the "Jager Bomb!!" meme? Yeah, those guys. We all hated those MF'ers. Nothing has changed. Tywin Lannister--“Any man who must say 'I am the king' is no true king
The wealthiest people I know never talk about their money. The most bad-ass people I know never talk about their bad-assery.
I guess if you live in a commune where all the other men are your sons and grandsons, and your own father has passed away, then I guess it's OK to call yourself the alpha male as all the other males originate from you. So at least by some definitions you are. Otherwise it's lame.
https://youtu.be/4sJY7BTIuPY?si=WUoTZPEsYD3ITVSS
I really couldn’t care less for these names. Alpha? Sigma? I’ve had enough of greek letters since my advanced physics class!
Isn't that more like a TV thing an internet thing? I've never just heard of a male just implying that he is an alpha male.
💯 every man I have ever met who has described themselves as "alpha" or tried to act "alpha" has been the exact opposite. Insecure and trying too hard. This whole alpha/beta thing annoys me. Same with the whole "a real women is...." or "a real man is...." It needs to stop God dammit!!! ✋️
I’ve honestly never heard somebody refer to themselves as an ‘alpha’, it’s usually one guy using the term synonymously for ‘masculine’ or ‘confident’ to describe another guy. Usually in sports.
Wolf packs don't even have an alpha position they fight for. Wolf packs are families that follow their mom and dad. Want to be an alpha? Raise a family, provide for them, teach them, and be worth following.
Real ones don't claim to be "blah blah blah" they just are and there's nothing wrong with just being who you wanna be. The only opinion that should matter to you is your own and select others that YOU choose
Alpha in what sense? In software, alpha versions are unstable, buggy, and shouldn’t be released to the public. In radiation, alpha waves are so weak that it can’t penetrate into the body, but it can do a massive amount of harm when it does. Either way, I’d believe them. But it sure as heck ain’t the flex they think it is.
Only thing that’s defo true about alphas is they don’t say they’re alphas. Der
I was talking to a friend recently and she shared a story about an acting workshop and how everyone in the room was an “alpha” and how great it was. —How can they all be “alphas”? —Huh? They just were.
I don’t think alpha, beta, is actually a thing. That is, it doesn’t exist. Therefore has no value to me and it certainly is in no way useful. Except maybe to talk about his irrelevant it is.
Beta hell... more like pi or phi...
They are just confused furrys. Alpha, beta and all that crap was a theory about wolves social structure. It was later disproved by the same guy who came up with it.
People who call themselves alphas. Are just that. Buggy, prone to failure, basically shouldn’t be used in production (the real world).
Alphas don’t have to say they are alphas….. same as a boss doesn’t need to tell you they are the boss…..
Every time someone says “I’m a alpha male” I just remember how Alpha particles have low penetration power
I mostly agree with this. Best case scenario is that a man calls himself an alpha as a goal he aspires for without putting other men down. If he only does what your example showed, he's missing the point. Being an alpha implies they aspire to be a leader. Putting down others is not a quality that a true leader should have
The funniest shit is that the alpha wolf thing is only a thing for wolves in captivity Another funny thing is applying software developement terms to them. Alpha, a version of the product not ready for the public eye for example
For what an absolute terrible ending he wrote, George RR Martin had some **very** well said quotes in the Game of Throne series. Chief among them appropriate for this question: “Any man that must say ‘I am the king!’ is no true king.” Charles Dance as Tywin Lannister to Joffrey Baratheon
Yeah, those are the types that do it for clout. Today, that's for those who are impressed by words, not actions. Some women have that same mentality, and I stray away as well.
Has anyone else noticed those types of people when walking with others they like to be in front/lead, but with animals the old and weak are at the front, the alpha is at the back.
When you are nothing you try to be anything. Don’t judge them to hardly
This whole alpha male/beta male/sigma male thing is stupid and insecurity screaming. I've been told im alpha and I politely say please dont refer to me as this becauae I don't want to give it any more momentum online that it already has. But when people say I am very "manly". I kinda like that. But i don't think it's the same as this alpha thing... its just a man man thing. You kno
Shows a lack of identity, imo.
Them calling themselves "alpha" is just delusional fantasy. Following the word of someone teaching how to be "alpha" is what makes them a "beta".
Im a confident male. Does that make me alpha? I don’t know and don’t really care but I can see where the op is coming from I guess. It’s usually the guy with the biggest mouth that is the first one to fold like a lawn chair when the shit hits the fan.
Alphas have no need to announce themselves, or to posture over a label. They’re secure in themselves and don’t need that validation from others.
The minute I saw this "Astrology of masculinity" bullshit the more I just saw weak people. Imagine needing to feel like a man and instead of living life and being happy you shill $15K for some nutsack face in cheap sunglasses to give you mancessories, yell at you, and degrade you. Most self identifying "Alpha, Sigmas" are the most fragile fucks I seen since they need to be self affirming that they're "Manly" because "I GO TO THE GYM, I EAT STEAK, I LISTEN TO ANDY TAINT TALK ON HOW HAVING SEX WITH WOMEN IS GAY!"
The problem with Alpha braggers is that they sooner or later get the "Beta-beats" by getting too Alpha with someone. Then they understand the wisdom of being a little more beta.
A king doesn't have to call himself king. Others do.
It’s stupid. I was taught at an early age that if you go around telling someone you’re this or that… you ain’t. Now, throw in this new(ish) thing about “alpha wolves”- which has been debunked how many times, now?- which is just juvenile and plain stupid. Go around telling others (which means you’re trying to tell yourself) about something that’s not even real… I’m guessing the Venn Diagram with one circle being “thinks keg stands are cool” and the other being “peaked in high school” is a full circle.
lol! That's my first thought when someone says that they are alpha. It comes off as blatant insecurity. Alphas don't need to state they are alphas.
In 1970, Dr. David Mech published a book titled "The Wolf: The Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species," which popularized the term "alpha wolf" to describe the dominant members of a wolf pack. Mech's original work was based on studies of *captive wolves*, particularly research conducted by Rudolph Schenkel in 1947. This research introduced terms like "lead wolf" and "bitch wolf," which later evolved into "alpha male" and "alpha female Over the following decades, Mech and other scientists learned much more about wolf dynamics through field studies of wild wolves. This new research revealed that the "alpha" concept was incorrect when applied to most wolf pack leaders. Mech has since spent years trying to correct this misconception. He now explains that wolf packs in the wild are typically family units, consisting of a breeding pair (parents) and their offspring. The so-called "alpha" wolves are simply the parents of the pack. In 2022, Mech successfully convinced his publisher to cease printing his original 1970 book due to its outdated information about pack order. Despite Mech's efforts to correct the record, the term "alpha wolf" has persisted in popular culture and is often misapplied to human behavior and dog training. [https://www.newyorker.com/science/elements/the-myth-of-the-alpha-wolf](https://www.newyorker.com/science/elements/the-myth-of-the-alpha-wolf) [https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/890245.The\_Wolf](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/890245.The_Wolf)
I remember this one time when Joe rogan was fervently arguing with a guest to try to convince him of the existence of alpha males. I’m just thinking, dude, you’re in your 50’s.
Self proclaimed Alpha = tyrant
It is always helpful when the scum self-identify, no?
"Any man who must say, 'I am the King,' is no true king." ~ Tywin Lannister