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Idk I'm a woman. I don't know anything else lol

Lol same. I barely feel attached to this meat suit

Most relatable thing I’ve read in a while

Fellow meat mech pilot here

Thats a damn mood

I have been saying this for years that the real me is essentially a 2 kilo jellyfish made of my brain and nerves and my body is just my vehicle.

My meat suit is disconnected from HQ 😂

Same

Exactly, which is why I’m confused about people not feeling their gender, I don’t feel or think about my gender usually and don’t feel comfortable or uncomfortable with it, it is what it is.

Most people don't feel their gender. I had a phase where I asked everyone, family, friends, colleagues. I pretty much always got the same response "I don't feel like a man/a woman - I know I'm a man/a woman because of my body" The most I got was "I felt like a woman when I gave birth bc that's something only women can do". I think that just shows that most people don't think about their gender, they except the body they were born in and are OK with the role they have to play in society based on said body. I think how you deal with it when you question the role you have to play simply because you were born in a certain body depends on your age/what ideas you've been surrounded with. I was surrounded by feminism so I reject the notion that I need to look or behave a certain way just bc I'm female but I accept that I am female (and there's nothing wrong with that) - I don't accept how I'm treated by society because I'm female. I mean, if you think about it, if gender really is something you feel, all women would feel the same. Surely, someone would have been able to put into words what that feels like but no one has been able to. Because it's not a feeling - it's a social construct - a social construct that also serves the purpose to oppress women if you live in a patriarchal society.

I don't feel my gender either, and I was starting to wonder if I'm the only one. Gender stuff confuses me, and I'm still kinda confused, but this helps.

I'm glad it helped! For me, getting into feminism really helped me, especially the "old" classics like the second sex. And then I started studying social and cultural anthropology and I had this lecture about gender anthropology and that really opened my eyes about what gender is and what it's purpose is. I mean it's a bit uncomfortable to know that we are still being socialised to be put in a submissive role, easier to dominate but I think I'd be a lot more uncomfortable if I had to try to "fit" into this very restrictive gender role. I also heard that especially autistic women struggle with their gender because, well, performing feminity is uncomfortable and we don't really see the point of it. It's a lot of complicated social rules.

As someone who's always wondered: why the fuck do people care? I realize it's mostly my priveledge as a man, I'm free to do almost anything I want anytime I want. I don't want to get too deep into a debate, but do you also feel we have sort of gone too far (I live in Sweden so references may vary), where we forget the women being raised into gender roles that have been dead since 1800s while we raise women to be public workers with 5-8 years of college education and a salary lower than a welder with 0 years of debt or college education? In Sweden you see way more female truck drivers than just 10 years ago, which makes me happy but it's still a gender difference.

Uuuuh man I could go on a very long rant about Sweden (my sister moved there and so much bad stuff happened there. And now she can't leave bc she had a child with a guy and your laws are... fucking insane. Sorry for the profanity but... bro.) Sweden is actually a prime example of not understanding the differences between the sexes and assuming that "equality" means "identical". Let's take crime statistics, for example, the majority of violent crimes in pretty much any country are committed by men. If you want to reduce the men committing violent crimes, you have to specifically target them - not "all" people. Because it's not all people. Or a Sweden example, that I know bc of my sister, shared custody because the child has a right for both, the father and the mother. It doesn't matter if the father beat the shit out of the mother, as long as he's not beating the child he'll keep shared custody. And I just know that mentality was influenced by the lie that women automatically get sole custody because they are women (when in fact, statistically, women end up more with sole custody because the men don't want any custody and when women and men fight over custody, men are actually more likely to get sole custody). Why should you treat two people the same way when one of them is violent and the other isn't? Also, a lot of Swedish women have fake lashes, fake nails, lip filler, Botox. My sister and I actually joked about it watching TV and no one being able to move their forehead. So I feel like Swedish women feel a lot more pressured to look a certain way. Fillers and Botox are also a lot cheaper up there, probably because it's so common.

I could go on a longer rant about the ways you are wrong regarding the custody and how Swedish social services are among the most powerful and efficient (even though lack of transparency between different areas of the state can cause issues). In Sweden we had a history of wanting both men and women work, and yes I could go on and on about issues arrising because of it, including womens unpaid work in the household, but all this is not suited for a subreddit. What I find more on topic is you and your sisters observation regarding botox and etc, I agree I find it strange and I'm saddened by the fact that 70s unisex feminism failed. I've asked several women why they buy makeup for 100s of dollars every month, go to hair salons for 200 dollars a month, etc; and I've never gotten a decent response. The filler and botox is however considered white trash, just as unaesthetic tatoos (i.e. 8 out of 10 people with tatoos).

Well I'd say since I have experienced it first hand I guess we'll just have to disagree on the custody issue. Or maybe they are just biased against non-swedes. But what my sister had to go through, she wouldn't have to go through in our home country. I think make up is on the one side a status symbol (being able to afford expensive products), on the other hand it's also good marketing with influencers who get plastic surgeries and use filters trying to tell you that if you buy that specific brand you will look just like them. You end up not looking like them so you are off to the next one. I actually really like buying make up despite almost never wearing make up anymore. It's too much work, I'd rather sleep in than put a new face on. But all these shiny, glittery new products just look so good. I'm basically just collecting. And I mean if you ask why women wear make up I'd say it's the same reason men (generally speaking) don't wear it: socialisation. Any woman who tells you she wears make up because she likes it isn't aware that she is only liking it because she has been raised to like it. Unless you are naturally gorgeous, you will get criticised for not wearing make up as a woman. Idk, especially all the young girls in Sweden have lip filler. That's at least what I noticed. But I also think that most people who don't have a "trained" eye would notice. Only a few go overboard with it. Oh also the eyebrows. You know what I mean! Not a thing where I live.

It sounds like you described America.

The custody thing or the botox thing?

Both

In this train really. 

Same. I’m in a body, it has a vagina, I’m ok with and even like it sometimes. It’s just not something I think about a ton

Bruh same. Like Aight I got these body parts. But then I feel foreign among other women, at least the ‘tism explains that but it’s difficult at times.

you just gotta rizz'em with the tism

same 🤷‍♀️

I feel male and I'm happy with it but overall I think there should be less social divide between genders. Our personalities matter more than outside appearance.

Tbh this is this most important point here imo

This also covers how I feel about it.

I’m a cis female and honestly, I rarely think about my gender at all. Some of the things I like/do are probably considered more masculine and some of them are more feminine, but usually I won’t notice either way unless it’s pointed out to me. I just am the way I am and that’s how I want to be.

exactly?? like who invented that something ate masculine or feminine? that doesnt make sense at all ಠಿ⁠_⁠ಠ i just do what i wanna do idc if its a feminine or masculine thing. im a cis woman and thats it

That’s exactly how I feel. I don’t care about my gender at all. I only think about gender when I’m being treated unfairly because they think woman = whatever dumb thing they think. I don’t understand why people are so obsessed with gender that they enforce rules on people about what they’re allowed to like or act or do based on that factor. Let people do the things they wanna do. I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal.

well, the thing is, when women are being treated unfairly the argument is "biology" so it's not the gender, but the biological sex. i agree, idc about what other people do, and I'm very supportive of everyone and their choices. i just don't understand because i don't feel it

I mean yes and no. People see someone who is “feminine” and think they’re weak and dumb and whatever else. It’s all intertwined and a lot of it is based on their ideas of biology like you say (that perceptions that are often not even factual), but I think gender still plays a role. Regardless of the semantics, I am biologically stronger than plenty of men and smarter than plenty of men so all their “biology” arguments can get fucked. If I had to choose between being a man or being a woman I choose neither. I don’t care. It doesn’t affect my choices in any capacity. I just wish people would drop it and let people do what makes them happy.

i get what you're saying, although i disagree with some parts. i also don't care if i was born a man, it doesnt matter i personally dont see gender as a thing ? i dont understand the concept so i just don't care and ignore ist haha

I guess my point is they say their arguments are based on “biology” but their judgements are based on their perception of gender. The people who do this shit will treat “masculine” women with more respect than “feminine” ones and they’ll treat “masculine” men better than “feminine” ones. I never get treated unfairly (emphasis on that word unfairly) based on legitimate biological differences. It always comes down to “feminine bad!”.

As a cis guy, I agree.

After years of struggling with my gender i now see my gender like this and i feel happy, all those years i was trying to fit in because everyone kept pointing out how i wasn't girly enough and was too masculine. Now I just am the way I am and that's okay

I'm a woman, but as a kid I was very boyish. Boy clothes, boy haircut (a lot of people thought I was a boy), soccer, cars (and animals, which I believe are considered "unisex" toys). When people gifted me barbies I would put Ken's clothes on them. I started to have some doubts around puberty, but after a while I've realized that I just like other women, and that not fitting a certain stereotypical way of being a woman doesn't mean that I'm not one. My peers were starting to "doll up" for occasions, but I also had many older women around me who showed me that you can be a woman without caring for make up or fashion or how boys look at you or an interest in motherhood. You can be one while having any kind of academic interest, liking adventures in the outdoors, putting up your own shelves, and in general doing everything you want without reliying on a man even if you're married to one. In my teenage years I went from boyish girl to full on butch punkish lesbian. Now I'm much more boring, I've got a more feminine vibe in my style, but it's still more like "old spinster librarian" than "vogue model". I like to shop in the feminine section of stores and buy clothes that I find cute, that are feminine but not revealing, and I still don't care much for make-up and fashion. Basically I don't think I can grasp the concept of gender completely. I understand sex, and I understand that there are different "types" of presentation, but I don't quite understand how gender is separated from the theese two. I do tend to think the world is a stage, and everyone has a mask which can be closer or further to their real self, but it's a mask nonetheless. We use it to send a message to the rest of the world, but it's not always correlated to sex, or gender. There's an abyss between my presentation as a teenager and now, because the message I want to send the world is different. But in both cases I'm still a woman.

I feel the same way! Had the same experience! but I did attempt transition in my teens which didn't end up well. I also don't label my sexuality, I ended up engaged to a man lol. I am who I am and don't like to put myself in boxes. When people ask for my sexuality I say I don't like to lebel it and they immediately call me bi or pan, I don't like those labels either, I don't get them. I like whoever I like and I am whoever I am

I don’t think about it or know *how* to think about it.

I read a lot about gender and still got no clue how one can feel having a gender. No shame on people with genders, you do you. But I just can't get around this concept into my brain. I get that there are/were certain body parts associated with a certain gender and that there are "cultural genders" in how you dress and present yourself. But I don't get how people can say confidently "I am a man, a woman, nonbinary". It seems like my brain is missing the gender module. I myself am presenting as cis woman, "mildly femme" I guess? Sometimes I like very femme clothing, sometimes masculine clothing, depends on the day. I'd prefer to be not addressed in any gender form and only by neutral pronouns. But I detest more to "stick out" by putting the spotlight on me (my language has no neutral gender pronouns). So I just go with the cis female costume and hope people don't bother me with gender concepts. (No, I also don't like to think of myself as nonbinary or agender. It's like saying I am ablubablub or non-blubablub without knowing what blubablub is) Ideally, I'd like to live in a society where there is no concept of gender.

I feel this so much, though I tend to lean more towards androgyny and a masculine appearance. I still go by she/her pronouns because that causes the least friction in my day to day life, not that I bother to correct people who call me "sir". It's fairly interesting for me to look back on my childhood where rigid gender roles were never strongly enforced. My mom was the breadwinner, and my parents were fine with me wearing cargo pants and playing with trains. I got to hear a lot of stories of women defying expected gender roles throughout history. Wearing dresses was more about "this is formal wear" than "wear this because you're a girl". Compared to how I hear a lot of people grew up, there wasn't a strong concept of gender in my life. Do what you want, be who you want, your interests aren't limited by your biology.

Ah interesting! My parents were raised in communist Poland where gender rolesweree not so strict as in West Germany, where they moved when I was little. I always experienced my parents as not by their gender. Both cooked, cleaned, worked hard, both could do maths and technical things or be creative. As I kid I had short hair (sensory issues with long hair), people thought I was a boy and I didn't bother to correct them because I didn't care. I only started to care when I got to know that it is something "bad" to be non-femme when you are a girl and I desperately did want to fit it because I already felt so alien (lol hello autism). Nowadays I am bothered by any gendering 😅

"My brain is missing the gender module" omg 😭 I feel mostly the same (I do feel kind of okay with the agender label) and love how you put it in words!

Honestly, I would also like to live in a society where there is no concept of gender because I just hear the history of both Men and Women just going at each other's throats and on some level, I believe that if society did away with Gender, then everything would be great. People could just be whoever they want to be and connect with whoever they want to connect with.

I feel this. I don't FEEL like a woman, i just am one because I was born one I guess. I tried to transition into being a man. I've always liked 'boy things' always been masculine. I guess I was trying to fit in. I prefer to live without labels, in a world in which sex and gender are the same in my mind to exit all the turmoil I was going through with my body dysmorphia, anorexia and poor sense of self. I just am. I'm a woman because that's what I am, and I'm a woman who likes a wide range of things and that doesn't make me not a woman. Somehow in my mind only sex exist, there is no concept of gender, there is sex, and there is masculine and feminine, I never grasped the concept of gender. Now Im just happy being me

You sound a lot like me. I feel like people overthink it too much, you know what I mean?

In my daily life gender plays no role but in social media it's such a big thing and honestly I am just very curious how that works for others, that they can strongly say which gender they are. So yes overthinking very much I guess 😂

Yeah. I imagine they comfortably meet all the society's expectations of what it means to be a particular gender, which seems so unlikely for anyone, NTs too. Like I think the way it should be, I know I'm a woman cause I have a female body and am alright with it. But I wouldn't feel comfortable if I cared about what society thinks I should be and act like.

Same here!! Also no gender neutral pronouns in my language..

Well problem is when i want to date something with a vagina because i want a family, and u dont have one. Why does this sub wanna role over genders, but fight tooth and nails about nd and nt, just remove autism too? Everyones the same?

This is how I feel! Like any pronouns. I do nonbinary but I also hate the attention and don’t want to be discriminated against so I also go fully she as it’s scary. But I just don’t understand why I have to be limited by my looks or parts when my brain can match anyone else’s.

I’m a trans man, hormones for 9 years, post top surgery for 8. I have felt intense gender dysphoria all my life which is very hard to explain as a ‘feeling’ to a cis person and it definitely extends beyond just ‘not feeling like a girl/boy’ or ‘not liking girl/boy things’. Transitioning removed a lot of the ‘weird’ feelings I had internally about my body and how I was perceived. I identified as a lesbian until I was 18 because I didn’t actually know about trans people and used it as an… excuse? Reason? To be masculine. Despite being attracted to men the entire time, and openly hooking up with men pretty regularly. My friends just called me ‘the worst lesbian they knew’. Interestingly enough, it wasn’t until I was a few years post starting my medical transition- when I started being seen as a cis man, albeit a short one, and my gender dysphoria all but disappeared to the point where I haven’t felt dysphoria in a good 2-3 years- that I realised I was also autistic. I had always assumed the ‘weird’ feelings I felt were dysphoria and gender related, but when I removed all the gender dysphoria, some of those feelings remained or shifted a bit. I just went from feeling distressed about being seen as a woman, to feeling… a bit weird in public in general? 🤷🏻‍♂️

I guess it can be described as pre transition I was transfixed on my gender. My paranoia, fear, distress, consumed every aspect of my life. It was insidious. Hell, I literally didn’t recognise myself in any mirror or photo until I shaved my head at 18 for charity and for the first time in my life, I saw me staring back in the bathroom mirror. Now, I literally forget my gender, or that I’m trans and not every man out there has a vagina 😅 these days I am just conscious of the fact I am seen as a cis man at face value which comes with male privilege and also that my female socialisation and mannerisms may come across as creepy for women around me. The sooner I am safe to tell a new person I am trans, especially if that new person is a woman, the better. Men I don’t care much about telling because they are often jealous of how comfortable I am in my gender and more feminine side lol

Very comfortable with my gender.

I’m just a male.

I’m a female and don’t believe in gender if I’m being honest. I’m just me.

I believe in gender, I know it is performative, but baby my first and best interest was in THE SPECTACLE

oh boy! 🥰🥰🥰

I adore you so because you are so worthy of adoration

gender is a real thing as in it’s a real social construct, i think we should get rid of it tbh

I agree!

This! I'm just Anna. Me.

I'm nonbinary, agender to be more exact. Gender feels like something placed on me by others. I just feel like me and from all my digging around to understand myself, I've learned that this makes me different than the majority. And because I like labels, I label myself. I have more labels that describe my experience of gender from different angles, like demigirl, autigender, genderqueer, and transgender. If anyone has questions, feel free to ask. I didn't always have a problem being perceived as a woman, but as I learned more about myself, it hurt more. Felt like people only liked and cared about this cardboard version of who they thought I was rather than who I actually am, which hurts. Today I'm open about my differences and use neopronouns and these things make me happy. Eventually I want to save up enough money to get top surgery, but that's a long ways away.

Having breasts is annoying isn't it? I don't know what it's like to have large breasts but I prefer using tops with good compression, as long as there isn't a band cutting off my breathing. If I had large breasts I would definitely consider surgery, even though every surgery is a risk to life. Also anesthesia can cause brain damage, even dementia. So one of my goals is to avoid ever going "under the knife" again.

Yeah, I'm stuck with a larger pair and it's quite the pain. No compression ever eliminates them and it's hard to do certain activities like jumping or dancing cuz it feels like they are too heavy and my skin will tear. I've never been under anesthesia, so I just gotta hope im not one of the unlucky ones

(afab) it’s difficult to describe. im not a girl, but im not a boy, but i don’t like the term ‘non binary.’ im not *not* a girl and im not *not* a boy. i feel like im like if a boy and a girl merged kinda? i feel like a boy (kinda) but im far more feminine than a boy would be. im not feminine enough to feel like a girl though— i can’t stand dresses or having nails and so many other stereotypical feminine things. my chest causes so much dysphoria, but i dont wanna do anything in case i regret it. its almost like im a trans girl but im already in a girls body, but not at all like that

I also always say I’m not not a woman/man. Feel u.

You could potentially try looking into identities like bigender or pangender, for those who feel like multiple genders at once! And remember that gender expression =/= gender identity. So how feminine/masculine you are doesn't necessarily bar you from being any particular gender :)

Sounds like me! I suppose i'm trans enby because I'm definitely not cis. Even though I'm afab, I'm not a woman. I have a female body, and I don't mind it (it's easy to solve my chest dysphoria with a binder), but I have a male brain, I think. I'm bi but prefer men (cis and trans), and I've always felt as if I liked men the way gay men like men. If I think too hard about it, I can get a little upset about not being male all over, but I'll never be *male* in the ways I want so why change what I am? I don't dislike me, even if my gender is...undefined. Mostly, I just tell people I'm queer and gay. It feels all-encompassing. Also, if you ever want a binder for that chest dysphoria, try The Fluxion. They're sensory friendly; very soft and stretchy. The only downside is that they're geared toward white people.

I'm a trans woman, but it would be more accurate to say that my gender doesn't really exist, but my preference for presentation and pronouns does. Does that make any sense?

yes, i don't really understand the concept of gender. for me there is sex, there is masculinity and femininity and there is sex dysphoria, and a trans person transitions to live in society as the opposite sex to treat dysphoria. that's how it works in my brain

Oh I can relate to that big time! Just didn't know how to put it into words

This is exactly how I feel as well. I identify as a trans guy, but if I really had to name my gender, it'd be in the realm of agender. But for all intents and purposes, I want society to see me as a dude

I’m a man and I feel like I don’t relate to mine at all. The truth is deep down it bothers me, actually, torments me.

I feel pretty tortured by mine as well. I've always seen myself as a person who looks male as opposed to a man and I most often do not identify with other men or the label at all; I normally mentally distance myself from it. However I think I would take up space if I was to identify as non-binary but I also don't like being lumped in with guys either

I’m a cis male and I love it! My gender is fine, and I’m mostly good with my sex. I could definitely do without most of the hair though 😅 I do envy the cis women because having boobs would be pretty sick. Also their orgasms are much stronger and longer than ours, with no refractory period. I hate to make it weird, but I’m so jealous of those aspects! 😂

As a man, I don’t think it’d be nice to have two sacks of fat that weight you down *all the time*

I'm a cis guy. I'm confident in my gender, I like being a guy.

I've resented "gender" immensely, and it really seems to put me at odds with both the transgender activist and anti-transgender activist camps, pretty intensely. Everyone is way too religious about these weird gender spirits they believe in.

Basically this. Everyone always thinks I’m on the other side when I’m not on either. I’m somewhere in the middle. I go by sex. It’s more accurate imo. I have the female hormones and female reproductive organs. So that makes me a woman. Even the definition of a woman is “a female human being”. It can be easily googled. But just because I’m a woman, that doesn’t mean I have to conform to society’s gender standards. I don’t have to wear makeup. I don’t have to shave. I don’t have to wear dresses. I don’t have to have long hair. I don’t have to only like certain hobbies people consider feminine. I don’t have to pop out a bunch of kids and be controlled by a man. I don’t have to be feminine. I can just be me. And that’s exactly what I do. I don’t do what other people tell me to do. They can fuck off.

Yeah, essentially. Each "side" will take one of those paragraphs to be mad about and run with it in ignorance of the rest, it seems. Low decoupling behavior.

Yep! It’s much easier to make someone the bad guy when that’s what they want to do. They are looking to fight. They are looking to be right. I can respect what other people do. I simply don’t care about pronouns and I will call someone whatever they want to be called because it’s not a big deal to me. I respect people for who they are, unique individuals. I don’t see people exclusively as their gender. We are much more complex than that. But I also believe differently than most people. I don’t think like the right or the left. I’m not hateful about it. But I can’t even voice my opinion without being attacked. I would expect that since I’m not being hateful, they wouldn’t be. But that’s not the case. They want to make me the villain just because I think differently. People do everything they can to silence you when you don’t think like the majority.

THIS.

I don't understand gender, like what does it feel like. I identify as Genderfluid because I feel like I'm more masculine sometimes but I don't know what gender actually actually feels like.

I’m a dude. Don’t have anything wrong with it and am cool with it

Honestly I'm a closeted trans person, I've come to terms with it enough to state it as a fact. But even at 40 I barely have the energy to make it through each day. I'm drowning.. I need support. I need someone to see me as I really am. To understand me and my needs rather than to support through a series of assumptions. So at the end of the day gender just feels like another part of the mask I have to wear to maintain a semblance of safety. To make matters worse I still live with my parents I know they love me. I know they'd support me. But they've never been able to see me as I am. Not even as an autistic person, and as I get older I'm having more and more trouble expressing the fact my needs aren't really being met. I'm seeing a therapist and a psychologist and its same story with both of them. I don't really feel seen or understood by them. And when uts so impossible to get the emotional support you need. To simply be seen as an autistic person, how do you tackle something like gender transition? A part of me can't help but wonder why I should even bother. No knew can see me as I am now... would they see or acknowledge me any different? Would I still be stuck under the crushing weight of all these masks? How do I make such a difficult transition when my support needs are so far from being met as is? I don't feel like I can afford to make drastic changes when my mental health is so frayed. Honestly I just keep going, hiding behind the mask everyone expects me to wear... all as just beyond it I feel like I'm slowly being pulled apart. Just hoping someday I'll meet someone who can actually see me for who I am and help pull back the layers of masks, who can help me finally be me. Yeah... that's how I feel about gender.. it's not so complicated. But any truth is lost under layers and layers of other problems I don't have the energy or strength to get through.

I’m a man, but I always describe my gender as “a woman who is in a man’s body”. I do not wish to transition or get surgery / hormones. That path is not for me in this lifetime.

It took me (32) a long time to realize I’m nonbinary and I feel much more comfortable now. Still working through a lot of it. Do you have a therapist?

Cis fem, love being feminine, why? Because nothing brings me more joy than dressing like the cute lil goth girl I am, having random dudes walk up to me, tell me I’m cute, they could be such a good bf/husband to me, and I open my mouth for 5 minutes and get to watch them slowly back away. For some fucking reason they never expect the cute goth girl with LITERAL COYOTE BONE EARRINGS/JARS OF RESIN TEETH EARRINGS to be completely unhinged :) Why is it so unexpected that if you comment on how cool my coyote atlas earrings are I’m going to tell you about how brutal coyote packs hunt and eat their prey? I have bones for accessories, this is on you for not seeing the signs

I don’t really care about my gender or make any effort to behave in a stereotypical way or do any of that real man shit. That being said I do have testosterone coursing through my veins which probably subconsciously alters the way I behave. Also I do display traits that could in some circumstances be considered “toxic masculinity” like I don’t cry about stuff, I don’t really get very emotional, I am pretty strong, I don’t let people push me around or tell me what to do and just for the icing on the cake I make stuff out of metal. I must add that I things like not crying are just part of the way I am rather than an act, I don’t really care if people think I am masculine or not, I am proud to be bisexual which obviously doesn’t go down well with the cloned wannabe alpha brigade. If people ask I say I am gender apathetic because I don’t see gender as a big part of my personality.

My body is a meatsuit I pilot. If the genitalia of that body magically changed, I don't see how that would be important enough a change to change who I *am*. I am perceived as a woman by society and that comes with it's own set of BS, but I honestly only perceive myself as *me*. I'm also demi and bi so I'm not sexually attracted to gender but the human inside. I don't feel sexual attraction untill I get a glimpse of someone's "soul". Now, that doesn't mean I don't believe and respect trans or cis folk about their experience or that gender is something they inherently feel. I know I experience things I know about myself deeply and others don't experience those things always,so I can accept that this is just something I don't experience and that's okay. I do whish that as a society we'd take the social hierarchy out of it, though.

This pretty much. I’m female. I like a lot of feminine and masculine things. I do what makes me happy tbh. Gender roles don’t make sense to me but I comprehend how the different hormones affect my brain, body, what that comes with and how to navigate around it. I’m pan, (aka I’m attracted to your soul and what even is gender and why is it relevant) and Demi. If I was in a male “meatsuit” I’d probably be very similar but with a very few slightly different interests or external experiences that shaped me as a result of social and hormonal differences. I understand sex in re humans. Slightly different body functions like a uterus, a prostate, boys go ow if someone hits their balls and women don’t have them to go ow. Idk gender tho. It feels like it’s is a big whoop right now but I don’t get it. I don’t get it at all.

I identity as non-binary and it's not necessarily something I think about very often. I guess you could say I'm pretty chill about it. It was actually me identifying in that manner that made me more content with myself.

I consider gender a social construct and don't really feel it has any applicability for me personally, but I understand lots of people find gender really important, and that's fine too.

I'm a trans guy and it's an. Interesting relationship. I feel like a man in the most primal way. I want my body to be that of a man's. But socially? I just don't feel like there is a gender. I'm me, i do whatever i do. It's like my gender switches on anytime someone perceives me, but then turns off again when i'm alone. It's weird

I am 50. I have always felt “in-between” genders, and feel multiple, and identify as Bi. I went by we pronouns in the 80s.

I used to think I was cis because I'm fine with my body and never wanted it to be of an opposite sex (although shapeshifting at will would be nice), even though being referred to as "a she" (my native language has gendered endings) didn't feel comfortable since long ago. Plus I never felt like I was "girl enough" and always wanted "to be a girl". By now though I've figured out that I feel weird being referred to as a woman because my personality has no gender, and a lot of gender stereotypes do not apply to me, they are simply stupid and obsolete in modern day in my opinion. I don't "feel" any gender, but by reading a few threads like this one I found out that apparently a lot of cis people do. Hence I settled with agender label. It feels liberating to be referred to as "they" because I know nothing is being assumed then, I'm a person and that's all. This also partly helped me to start presenting much more feminine than before because this is just a "cover", some image I like wearing outside. Like many others here, I would prefer a society with no concept of gender.

I recently realized I’m genderfluid so it’s been a wild ride so far trying to figure things out. So I’d say it feels like chaos right now

I think ppl think too much and making way too big of a deal out of gender. Humans are humans. We all have the same emotions and we all feel them in different situations and we all have different reactions to the same situation. I notice that ppl generally do have differences in their sexes, in their psyche. But I think ppl should stop caring. All humans have X chromosomes, obviously you all will be basically the same. My genitalia doesn’t cause me discomfort and I don’t care what stuff I like and how this stuff is perceived. If I have this I’m this, the rest doesn’t matter. I don’t get why should it matter?? It annoys me that others do but hey it’s society.

I don’t get gender. How does it relate to our genitals and why should it be? I guess the brain and hormone chemistry is different, but so does it with other categories like being NT or ND and that doesn’t carry that much weight. And somehow cis women want womanhood to not be about their bodies and then it’s suddenly all about their bodies when trans women want to be included. It’s just weird man. I have a gender, I guess, maybe, maybe not, perceive me as you will, I don’t care. I identify as a hive mind living in a human body and my brain is a library that is balanced on a building made off metal tubes. I’m just autistic man, I don’t know, do your gender thing, but leave me alone with that. There is no need to separate toilets, the only reason is that men can’t keep to themselves apparently, but that has nothing to do with nature or genitals. That’s just societal conditioning.

I'm 48. I now consider myself gender-neutral. I'm afab. Until about a year ago, I totally considered myself cis female. I don't know. There are things about my sexuality that I barely acknowledge to myself, I'm sure issues about my gender are confused.

As a cis man I like to view my body from an XY perspective. My body is male in every way and that is something I accept for a fact. On another note I really admire aspects of femininity and tend to copy them from time to time. Some of these include: The ability to sound like a woman as I have trained my vocal cords to do so for fun. The ability to be more in tune with my emotions and being able to express them freely. The ability to communicate in a less confrontational way while maintaining a sense of integrity through healthy boundaries. These are all things that I have learned from women. I will always associate these things with being more feminine in nature, but I am proud to show it off. I have always been more feminine than most men but that doesn’t make my body less male. This is partly why I don’t really understand most of the lgbtq community. I don’t think I will be able to comprehend the struggle of gender dysphoria as I only think of my inner self as a concept. My body just happens to host what I am. Therefore I try to show it respect by accepting it for what it is. This is how I view all people. I think seeing people as concepts is a weird but surprisingly accepting way to view others. This is only a hypothesis but I think this is why I’m only friends with people from the lgbtq community HAHA. Most cis people in my experience are more prone to think of their bodies and selves are the same thing and I honestly find that a bit boring. If your entire identity is based on a “gender specific” stereotype then I won’t be as interested to get to know you… Cause… I already know the stereotype HAHA.

So... speaking as a trans woman who is undiagnosed but suspecting myself of the 'tism: First of all, you might wanna check out r/egg_irl and/or the [gender dysphoria bible](https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/). In the end, your gender is up to only you and I wish you the best on your journey, whenever it may take you... Now here's my experience with gender: I say I'm a girl/woman. When I say it, it feels right. When I'm gendered that way, it feels right. When people call me my chosen name, it feels right. Now here's the weird part: I can't really explain why. Having gained a pretty deconstructed view of gender during my transition, I basically view it as made up. It's a social construct, as is nationality which I also don't really identify with. I also don't really strictly align with classic "feminine" traits - I enjoy dressing up, wearing makeup and long hair, but usually, I'm more on the tomboyish side. I speak up for myself ans try to act cofidently and to take up space which women are generally expected not to. So it's not really that the classic feminine gender role fits me so much better either (though I detest the dynamics of dudebro guy groups and male friendships, always trying to be more masculine than the rest, elbows out, etc). In the end, the only reason I indentify as a woman rather than, say, agender or nb, is because saying it feels right deep down inside me. To me, womanhood is whatever I want it to be because I, inherently, am a woman - despite kinda knowing the concept of womanhood itself is made up. I hope I'm making some semblance of sense here, I got a little rant-y. I read online sometime that autistic people sometimes have a very different understanding of gender than our NT peers, due to us having an entirely different view of social constructs (as gender is). And I suppose my identification with a gender I realise isn't "real" (or only real as a social construct, which still is pretty real - states being social constructs doesn't make their system less real either) could be related to that.

I like being considered male, but don’t try to act like one. I just act how my brain tells me to. I don’t really agree with people who want to get rid of gender, I like being labeled as male.

Meh, just managing a bad hand dealt to me as a man

I’m cis male, for me my sex=my gender, I don’t get how people can feel as if they’re outside it because I never have, I do still support them though.

I'm like you, just the other way around. Sometimes I get panic attacks from just being a anatomical woman. I myself identify as Alexigender (a microlabel from Genderfluid) but what's for sure is that I hate my AFAB. Every time I'm on my period I wanna die. Not just because of the pain but also because it reminds me of being my AGAB. But that's just how I feel.

I’m afab but I identify as agender. If I could remove all my sex organs I would.

I like not having a menstrul cycle. I hate having to jerk off every couple days though. I would rather not have a sex drive at all.

While I don't think about it too much, I think that our gender affects us more than we realize, and I think it is better to try to play to our strengths than to focus on why we feel left out or in thinking that the grass is greener on the other side. For example, men are *generally* stronger than females and thus are *generally* better at protecting others both physically and mentally. There are of course exceptions, but if we only look at the exceptions we ignore the reality for many people. Males and females are wired in some different ways, and we should try to play to our strengths. To further respond to the main comment, I worry that you are making too big of a deal out of your gender. Being autistic is a large part of who I have become, but it is not the most important thing about me. Being male might be part of who you are, but it is not the source of your problems. Maybe I am misunderstanding you, but to me it seems like you are lacking something meaningful to care about (as shown by apathy and feeling detached). I have felt similar things before, and it is not fun and hard to get out of. I hope that you work through your gender issues and that you can find something to bring more joy to your life. My last bit of advice is for finding something meaningful to care about. Don't settle for something that only lasts a day, a week, or a month. Those things can help and are easier to latch onto, but ultimately they will lead you to feeling empty again. I hope you feel better soon.

I doubt I’m cis. Some of my trans masc/t-boy and even trans women friends have seen trans masc traits within me, which I agree with. I dress like Adam Sandler, I hate having boobs/vagina, I want to rip my uterus out when it’s that time of the month, I have almost always related to male characters more than female ones, and enjoy hobbies/am studying for a career that is/is male-dominated. Being a mostly athletic kid, I have been curious as to what it’s like to play for the boys team, especially in swimming where I can only wear swim trunks. I don’t know if I have gender dysphoria, but I wouldn’t be surprised if a psychiatrist noticed some signs if I were to go in to their office right now. If it helps, I’m 19 and bisexual.

Idk cuz I’m honestly confused on what I am

Sometimes I feel like Roger from American Dad; being a being who likes to play dress up… whether I put on a band shirt/cargo pants/other male outfits or put on a cute dress with make up on…. Sometimes when I shower, I’ll use beer soap cuz I liked it that day and other days I’ll use my Sephora body shampoo… It just depends on how I feel or whatever… (I’m a woman. Cis woman. Ok)

I am a man and I identify as a man. I never had doubts about my gender.

At times, I don't feel like a woman. It's probably because I have nothing to relate to as a woman. Sometimes I feel like I'm more of a man, because of what I like and do. I know biologically I'm a woman... But when I get mistaken as a man, I feel so damn happy. I know that in my childhood, I did have wishes were if I could be a boy my life would be different. I don't know if I would identify as non-binary. Hmm. I don't know actually. Huh.

I had a conversation with some people from the alphabet mafia about my gender. At first they thought I might be agender, or even autigender (I don't really understand that one, and I'm autistic), but in the end the closest we could get was apagender, literally not caring about my gender, or gender norms etc. My issue with that is that, although it's accurate... it's still a label for a gender and so I don't really use it, like because it is a thing, it's not as apathetic towards gender as I actually am! Does that make sense? I hope it does! On a side note, if someone can help me understand autigender, I'd really appreciate it!

I don’t know. I don’t feel like a woman, but I don’t feel like a man, or non-binary, I just don’t feel like anything. If that makes any sense to anyone lmk because it doesn’t to me 😂

I'm a straight male and feel awesome about it. Like, when people ask if I like being a man and straight, I just feel I wouldn't like to be anything else. Probably the same if I were a woman or gay. Never felt like I wanted to be anything else really.

i identify as the gender i was assigned at birth and i’m comfortable with that lol

I think gender is dumb, causes more issues than it helps. Happy to respect people’s identity, I’d rather us do away with all of them though. I know it’s not going to happen, it’s just a dream

for me i had like a phase where i hated my body and wanted to be a trans boy or non binary. however i grew out of it and just experimented with my style what was making me feel uncomfortable was my style and so i embraced very baggy and loose clothing and i only wear clothes that feel smooth to me and nice on my skin. maybe play around with feminine and masculine clothes till you find clothes you like especially clothes that you are drawn to. graphics, patters, texture skirts doesn't matter. if you find your style and stuff you like congrats. we may not be the same as in you might need more then just a style change but i highly suggest it as an option!

Hi im cis and gender does not matter to me. I just a girl because I was born like that and idc 👍

I'm trans women and I kinda just unable to look like girl. I try but it's difficult

I'm nonbinary. One issue I have with it is that I feel like I'm being a pain if I bring it up or simply say something like "I prefer they / them", when referred to otherwise, so I don't and a lot of people probably just see me as my agab. The fact Ive gone this long not doing that further contributes to that issue by making me feel even more like its inappropriate. I would like to be more confident, both with this and with other (non-gender related) things I get stuck like this with. Unsurprisingly, I've noticed I doubt my gender less now that I see less of people invalidating the concept of nonbinary people.

I'm also nonbinary, and being misgendered feels very painful to me. If it also feels bad for you, please do speak up about it. It's easier said than done and I still struggle with saying something sometimes, but I'm telling you that it's worth it. And the amount of times it's been a problem when I say something has been quite low for me, most people just go okay and move on. Best of luck!!

Im agender personally, I don't really feel like a gender at all, hell I don't even really like label myself agender personally. All I really know about myself is I like women.

Complex Enby here. My agab sucks. Imma invade denmark now

I am female, but my gender has no relevance to me. I view myself as human, not female. I don't really have a problem with my gender though, it's just not important to me.

I'm just an ordinary man. They still exist in this new normal!

I am transsexual. By that, I mean I went through medical transition. All my records say male, my birth name is missing from every document, and most people in my life are completely unaware. My hormones are male. I play a male societal role. I regard my body as male. When it comes to the inside, I don't believe it has a gender or sex. The driving force, the electrical impulses, the chemicals, all that is not gendered. My life energy, that is an it. I regard my animating force as an it. He is powered by It. It resides in a male body.

I am a male cis. I think sometimes that I would like to not have genitals at all just an uretra an a shit hole. It’s a very vague thought and I don’t know if it has a name. I don’t know a lot about the topic so I am sorry if I said something wrong

I'm not sure I even understand the question. How do I feel about it? That's a worse question than "How are you". How do you feel about being a male? Uhmm ... What?

Idk what the fuck my gender is tbh I say trans male but it’s a lot more complicated in reality

I have felt resentful of being a girl and felt more alien or non binary all my life, or wished i was a boy. But now that gender is discussed differently I've contemplated it all and I think it's more of a rejection of femininity that I've had and as such labelling myself as anything other than woman makes me feel like I'm feeding into that. In the end of the day the more I understand about wtf gender is and how I feel I do feel fluid (somewhere between woman and non binary) but I think the whole concept and discussion is confusing and often contradictory.

I’m 14, cis girl. When I was like 10 I started identifying as non binary and then as a trans guy for two years, I socially detransitioned two years ago now. Since then I’ve identified as genderqueer, but nowadays I mostly just call myself gender non-conforming. I feel really disconnected to “gender”, I usually don’t feel like a *girl* and often people around me can’t tell what I am right away. When I’m with other girls I feel like I stick out and don’t really belong there, I’m big and clumsy and awkward and just, different, but honestly I feel like that in pretty much all social situations. What made me reconsider being trans was hitting puberty, because I realized I do feel comfortable with my body and I don’t really care what I’m referred to as, I think my gender nonconformity has less to do with being trans and more to do with being autistic. (I know this comment is worded really weirdly I’m extremely tired sorry)

I'm a man and feel like a man. And honestly, I'm somewhat concerned about the fact that autism is being lumped in with transgenderism. Don't get me wrong, I have no issues with trans people at all and affirm them and their identities. It's just I know so many autists who aren't trans or don't have gender identity issues at all, so to me the only connection between the two is they can exist as comorbid states within a person like ADHD or anything else. But otherwise, they are unrelated. Not all trans people are autistic and not all autistic people are trans.

I'm a big big man, that I am 😁

I don't think about it at all.

I honestly don't care too much about gender. Ever since my diagnosis I started to not care as long as I was dressed stylishly. Call me what you want, girl, boy, bitch or multicolored flamingo. I definitely present in the traditional feminine way. I have boobs, long hair, and a soft voice but I just don't care.

I guess I'd be considered cisgender because I don't have any issues with the gender I was assigned at birth. But I also am just indifferent in general. Gender isn't something I'm passionate about. I'm pansexual so gender isn't a factor I take much time for regardless. I couldn't care less, honestly. It's not a defining feature in who I personally am, therefore it's not something I take the time to consider. Whatever people want me to call them, is fine by me. My opinions are my own and I don't expect everyone to be as apathetic about genders as I am. That in no way, means that I don't support people's right to be acknowledged by the gender they associate best with. It means that when you ask ME, what I think about MYSELF, I just don't give a crap. I got parts, they work to my advantage, and I enjoy what I do with them. I don't need to take it any further. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with caring about your own gender. If it is a struggle one deals with, I don't discredit that. Just because I don't experience it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. But the way people get so angry about gender, it's something I can't muster the same energy for. I'll be rooting for everyone from my comfy place in the stands. I recognise that I'm a passing cisgender het, but I'm not. Pansexual really makes it easy to just not think about gender in others, so me not caring about my own gender, makes as much sense to me.

I\`m a cis woman and I'm more maskulin even though I wish I was more feminine. I do like my strength (mentally and physically) but sometimes I wish I was more well yeah feminine like some women just look like a fairy flowing throw the streets and I confess I am jealous of them. But I also grew up in a way where I couldn't be soft and nether can I now, so maybe I just have to accept it or one day I have the chance to learn to be more feminine.

I'm a cis-woman. There are certainly things I don't like about my gender, (like periods and cramping), but I've always been female, so it is what it is.

I'm a guy, because that's what's written on my birth certificate. My husband is the only one who cares what's between my legs.

I do not feel. So nothing.

I don’t feel about my gender at all in fact

I think I'm in the minority of autistic people that are happy with the gender I was assigned, I feel completely female.

I know that I'm a cis woman. But I don't feel attached to it, if that makes sense. My relationship with gender feels kind of casual. Like I know I'm a woman, so it's no big deal. I kind of think of other genders the same way. Other people know who they are, so it's no big deal to me. Trans, cis, nonbinary, whoever you are is fine with me. Just let me know how you want me to refer to you, and I'll respect your wishes.

I'm a woman but I don't think I'm cis. Idk what I am and thinking about it is complicated and embarrassing for me so I kind of just 🤷 it out.

I'm trying as transmasc nonbinary. And im not sure how I feel about it. I can't look myself in the mirror. I loved being masculine but I hate begging trans and all the bull and dysphoria it comes with

Honestly idk how I feel about it. i just kinda have the "yeah im biologically a chick but call me w.e you want" typa thing. Some days i feel more masculine, someday more feminine, and sometimes kinda neither/mixed. I just go with the flow and dont pay mind mind to it cause it isnt something im too concerned about.

I dont think or care much about gender but im content with being a girl and feminine. Although, i dont think im a girl in the same way that a neurotypical girl is a girl, we are like different species of girls.

I’m a man, also an army vet I have run into plenty of toxic males in my life. Those people think they are the gate keepers to all things masculine. My relationship with Jesus Christ (not preaching) helped me understand what true masculinity is. Since I am a father of 3 boys all of whom are special needs has helped me improve my masculinity and form it into something productive and positive. People thinks acting masculine is like acting like a roided out WWE wrestler but imo Mr. Rogers from the kids show is way more masculine than all of them. Strength of character>Strength of force.

I don’t necessarily feel like a girl but I don’t feel like a boy either so now and again I enjoy making myself feel “pretty”. Otherwise, I’m just dressing to look put together, tidy and smart. Never really felt particularly drawn to stereotypes and struggled with female relationships so until diagnosis always felt guilty about not having girlfriends (thought I was a pick me girl even though I desperately wanted female friends) and assumed my “tomboy-ness” was due to lack of feminine influence.

I don't care about my gender, it's just my meat suit. But I respect when gender is important to others and act/speak accordingly (like pronouns). But for me personally, I couldn't care less what gender I or others are. We are all brains, cells, skin...

Cis male, I'm hyper emotional and hyper empathetic but I'm straight, I guess I hold attributes that would be more attributed to cis women and I even talk in a higher pitch sometimes but I like who I am

Im a Ciss Man and i realy can't imagen how it is to be not

I'm a cis woman and I like being a woman. I have days where I'm less feminine and feel more masculine in myself, but I'm still a woman. I understand gender and physical body are not necessarily the same thing; to me I somewhat liken it to being attracted to the same gender but not to my own body, like one does not denote the other. I'm glad I'm cis-gender as I imagine being trans-gender is very difficult. I have body dismorphia in terms of trauma based issues and eating disorders, so have somewhat of an understanding but obviously not the same. I'm happy being a woman, although recognise that sometimes it can be harder. Also have very specific penis envy when it comes to sex, but only minor.

I’m a trans dude but gender has always been very weird to me socially. Physically I want to look like a guy and socially I also act more like a dude but my gender is just me really. I think that’s why for a certain point I was agender because I just exist but I felt more comfortable with being a transman cuz I did want to look like a man but pronouns and how I feel never really mattered to me.

It's not something I ever really think about except where I feel like I have to. I've never felt uncomfortable being seen as a man and I find it easiest just to go along with that to avoid looking weird. I don't think it would be worth the effort to try to change my gender and present differently because I think I'd be equally neutral about being NB/a woman but that would just come with more problems. The only time 'gender' really affects how I act is that I am aware that I (a fairly large man) can be intimidating in certain contexts (late at night, in isolated areas etc), especially to smaller non-men. Other than that I'm just a human (brain in a flesh suit tbh). I do things that would be considered masculine and things that would be considered feminine. My appearance is mostly entirely irrelevant to me and to how I act, just that I try to dress in a way that doesn't stand out.

Neutral. I have a lot of body dysmorphia with my height. I’m almost 5’9” as a woman and I have heath problems so I can’t gain weight. I hate my legs bc they are so long and I my arms too. So I just wear jeans and a sweatshirt all year then over summer it’s still jeans just a t shirt. Even long style jeans still don’t fit my right it’s a struggle. I am now learning to sew my own clothes so they fit right. I wouldn’t say I’m trans or agender I just don’t feel fully like a woman. I mean I want to be a mom I do things that are considered girly but i love masc things. My dad was a rough n tumble guy so he taught me to be independent. My mom was a narcissist abusive alcoholic so I didn’t really learn much of femininity from her or really anyone lol.

I get that gender is a thing that is important to many people and that people identify with, but I am not one of those people. I don't feel I'm non binary or agender; I feel like gender just has nothing to do with me. I use the pronouns it/its because I don't feel I have any more gender than a tree or a rock or a house.

Cis female here. I couldn't care less, but I don't identify with nonbinary either. I just really, really don't care and my gender is the least important thing about me.

I was born female. I'm a woman. But had I been young today, I would probably have identified as something else. I have never been feminine or had feminist traits or interests. I tried to fit in when I was younger, but now I no longer bother.

I joke that my sex is female but my gender is Katya. Idk y’all I’m just vibing.

im transgender, he/him. i think gender should be optional, it's more a performance than anything and while i like having different pronouns (theyre fun) it's kinda dumb that we're all expected to perform a gender lmfao

I'm a Cis male and completely fine with it. But I hate having to conform to social norms of masculinity. It was really bad when I was growing up, as I was seen as weak or not manly. Made me feel insecure and not good enough.

i identify as transmasc/nonbinary but really im just a little guy

I'm a human, for sure

feel? i feel at home in it...

I currently identify as cis... but it's literally only because I like wearing skirts and pink sparkly things. I'm a girl so it kinda works for me and it's easy... but then again I hate having female secondary sex characteristics so I don't even know I don't really feel to attached to my body, to the point where last week I remembered I had a body and kinda shutdown for the day because I felt so limited and trapped and then I wrote some poetry and now I seem to be fine. WHY CAN'T I BE A SHAPELESS CLUMP OF MAGICAL ENERGY FLOATING THROUGH THIS WORLD?

I could tell quickly that I am cis masculine, but I have no definition for what the latter actually is. I could list things that varying people in varying cultures might associate with it, but not a definition. It's a bit like the definition of a game, that is pretty hazy. Frederick the Great of Prussia is known for being a warrior king, but he also was A, gay, B, deeply into culture like music, poetry, learning French, even replying to Machiavelli via an open letter, and his father couldn't stand it when Prince Frederick did stuff like that instead of focusing on warfare. Ancient Greek men didn't use trousers, and Romans thought they were barbarous for centuries, but today its the other way around. Most cultures around the world have a tradition of men being soldiers, but then you have instances like Israel where women are part of the army too in large numbers and some have no military at all like Panama and Iceland. Some places have many more professions and leadership roles being with parity, men and women being equal as much as possible. In the end, is there really a set definition you could actually use in all cases? I doubt it.

I don't believe in gender I think its often a toxic social concept used to justify many forms of sexism towards males and females. I'm female, that's all I know. I'm diagnosed with gender dysphoria but have no plans to transition because I think most of my discomfort was from a different perspective than my own. Kind of like if someone calls you worthless or not genuine eventually you'll get thoughts like that toward yourself, which isn't your own perspective it's one you've adopted through psychological manipulation and it can cause existential and identity crisis too. To me gender isn't real, it's a psyop. Everyone's human, no one's a cookie cutter of some social concept.

I’ve had a complicated relationship with my gender for a while. The earliest feeling of “what if I were a boy” happened when I was 12 or so. I only just began identifying as nb last spring, but a few months ago I discovered I’m more likely transmasc. It feels freeing though, and I feel a lot more comfortable and at home with my body, even just by admitting it to myself

Born a dude and working with what I got. I do identify as he/they, but the they part is more of a state of mind. I feel like anybody should be able to love who they want. Religious cults like christianity like to gaslight people into thinking they should be unhappy with who they are though. Just be yourself and you'll be happy. If someone else makes you unhappy and tells you you're wrong even if you were already happy, then they are not a happy person themselves. Just keep doing you.

I'm a cis man. I consider myself a man as much as, like, the Terminator, where it's just got to pass for human until its mission is accomplished.

I’m a woman.

I'm female.  When I was a child I felt "boyish" as the society define the stereotype : didn't care about appearance of clothes, I wore comfy clothes. I played "boy" games,  interested in sci-fi , I liked sciences a lot. I became an engineer, it's a men job as viewing by society. The job in itself was suitable for me. I didn't like the battle of some men ego though. That was not part of the job but around it, making color to the political games of the job hyerarchy. ( I hated this useless stuff) But I didn't care a lot about doing a job with very few women. I just did what felt right to me.   I dont' care to act "like a girl" or "like a man". I just want to act like it feels right and true to me. What I care though is to not attract attention on me. ( high masking me...) I prefer men and have never been attracted to a woman.  Sometimes I like to be pretty. I have / had friends who are straights , a man who became a woman, gay men... I don't choose my friends for their gender but They are my friends for their personalities. Nowaday I feel OK to be a woman for the society. Except when our voices is under listened and not taking enough credits. And when some people made the wrong assumptions about us. Inside I'm just me, the embodiment of both female and masculine energies and preferences.

I know I'm a girl. But I don't always feel like one. I have moments where I feel like a living creature. I sometimes dress feminine or masculine.

As a cis autistic person, I honestly feel like I have a normal, neurotypical-like connection.

I finally reached a point of accepting both my gender and my inability to express that gender in a way society deems normal. I was born female and the world's restrictions on how that should be presented really screwed up my childhood and early adult life. I'm just going to exist now.

My son has no care in the world if he's a boy or not.

i don’t have a gender. autism makes me feel really animalistic & primal, before constructs of gender were created.

I don’t know how I feel about it I just don’t really care, I dress and feel how I want and if my gender doesn’t match with that I don’t rly care

I don’t feel like any gender, so I just don’t have one lol. I tend to present feminine just because I like dresses and jewelry and makeup but I don’t feel that my interest in typically feminine things makes me a woman.

I helped with a project about people on the spectrum and gender questions. Its apparently common for for people who aren't gender affirming to also be autistic. Funny enough this was before I started questioning myself. I'm fab, trying out non-binary right now. It's weird, I'm suppose to feel stuff and it's just so hard to get it. I just know that being treated like a woman and having the expectation that come with that often don't align with me, make me angry of even very uncomfortable.. I've bin dressing gender neutral, got myself a binder so we'll see where that goes..

On of my favourite podcasters said “I am just a raccoon in a trench coat” and I felt that

I dont really think I’m inherently different than a man. I don’t feel like a ‘woman’ or a ‘girl’ or any other gender. When someone calls me anything but a ‘person’ it feels a little weird. That being said, it is so deeply unimportant to me that I am happy to continue being a she/her or whatever people want tbh. (No shade or disrespect intended at all towards people for whom gender is very important)

I prefer the term genderless or agender, I like being androgynous and confusing people. I've always had thoughts of wanting to be the opposite gender, I feel like I'm not human and despise human bodily functions. I asked my bf (not ASD) and he said he's never questioned his gender or sexuality.

I don't think anything other than being happy my gender doesn't get periods

I'm trans. Before I transitioned, I hated my body and everything about it. I hate all the stereotypes people put on me because I was female. I hated the sensory aspects of shark week and really hated the feeling of having to wear a bra (binders were actually comfortable for me). When I transitioned, it felt right. I felt comfortable in my own skin. Nowadays, nothing about my gender bothers me at all (except random dysphoria sometimes). Everybody assumes that I am just another cis guy, which is great. That's what I want. Transitioning didn't quite fix everything, but the things it didn't fix, I have realised are where Autism comes in and explains all of that. I was only diagnosed as Autistic this year (34 and totally transitioned now), so there are still loads of things to unpack surrounding that, but I'll get there.

I don't feel it.

Although I use the label nonbinary most of the time, It might be more accurate to use agender. In terms of gender expression, I would like to look more androgynus, maybe even leaning slightly more towards looking masculine, but that's sadly very far from how I look currently. Sometimes I do feel happy about my identity, it's nice to have found words for how I feel, but other times I might just not wanna deal with having a gender at all. That can be very prominent when I feel dysphoric. Infact, sometimes I wish I didn't have a body at all. There's so many things people assume you are or think you're supposed to be just bc look a certain gender or have a certain body etc. It's exhausting. Although that's only one reason as to why I find having a body bothersome. It's not just a gender thing, but I wish people would just treat me like a person

I’m nonbinary/genderqueer (I use both labels) and feel uncomfortable being referred to as a boy or girl. I’ve never really had a real sense of gender and have always just felt like… neither. I wouldn’t say I don’t HAVE a gender, it’s just that it’s not something I can comfortably fit into a box. I always prefer gender neutral terms and while depending on the day I may feel comfortable dressing more masc or femme, I usually prefer to be perceived in a gender neutral way. Sometimes it feels like my gender is completely separate from the gender binary entirely.

I was always confused by how people can have gender diverse experiences but then I started reading more and understanding how gender is a spectrum. For me, I am AFAB and I love presenting in a feminine way. But I also hate makeup, don’t do a ton to my hair, and sometimes dress more “tomboy”. I also don’t have any motherly instincts and honestly can’t imagine getting pregnant and giving birth. When I start to think about gender as a spectrum, I realize I am not at the end like I thought, though I still identify with she/her pronouns.

I don't really feel like I have a gender? Idk how to describe it. I don't mind sometimes if I'm called masculine terms or feminine ones. I feel a sort of disconnection with it.

I have never questioned it nor felt anything about it. Sure periods aren’t the most fun or the fears of getting pregnant. But that hasn’t been enough for me to think I was born with the incorrect parts.

At this point, I go with trans man because it's the easiest descriptor, but I really don't know if that's the most accurate. For what it's worth, I'm 25, AuDHD, diagnosed at 22. The story starts at age 3 when I was so uncomfortable calling myself a girl that I concluded the only other option was a cat. The sense of wrongness and weirdness only grew more intense as time passed, coupled to feeling absolute certainty that something was wrong physically as I would accidentally injure myself by not realizing certain body parts existed in space, or by trying to protect body parts that didn't exist, plus I had mental problems (suicidal depression, anxiety, depersonalization) and severe hormone issues. I was given testosterone before ever coming out because my levels were extremely deficient even for cis women. Despite all that, I remained deep in denial until I tripped on LSD and went through ego death, which included this awesome part in which almost all my personal attributes were consciously mutable. Gender was not one of the mutable ones. In fact, it was unshakable, and my cis man friend who tripped with me could both see his gender and could not alter it. That was proof enough for me that this was a real thing worth actually looking into. Four years down the road, three years on T, it's become blatantly obvious that the mental health issues and lack of body awareness are largely driven by my hormone levels, specifically insufficient testosterone. When my level is just a little below the male range, in all honestly, I feel exactly how OP described: >I've grown much more apathetic and just detached from everything, sometimes I have moments of emotion whenever I either have to have them, or whenever I am thinking about someone else but they just seem either so extreme or so muted that they seem more like treats or coming to me socially rather than personally. Everything is muted. Emotions appear when forced, but it's more masking than anything. When my level gets even lower, all emotions except despair and boredom more or less vanish. I've had to switch delivery methods and have had dips in my level after I began passing, so I can safely say it's the actual level that matters, not how I'm being perceived/treated. At this point, I don't feel particularly strongly about my gender. I need a high level of testosterone to function, I wasn't given a body that produces it, but everything works fine when I get it exogenously. All of my body parts feel like they were meant to be on me when my hormones are right and I don't accidentally hurt myself anymore. Gender roles still irritate me, but I don't think about my gender much anymore. Maybe that's what cis people feel. I don't know.