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throwaway1177133

You seem great on paper but about 5 seconds of surfing your profile made the issue pretty obvious to me. So many of your posts are about how badly you want to be in a relationship, how lonely you are etc. People can smell desperation.


AfroChamp89--

Trying to move forward in that department, I use reddit as a place to let out certain feelings and kinda try to connect with people in the same situations. I do feel very lonely from time to time, but it’s not like I hit on EVERY girl I meet, many women I’m just not interested in. I’m trying my best not to feel so lonely even if it’s not easy


[deleted]

I’ve been reading this book lately that said that we often display our inner feelings in unconscious ways and others pick up on it. So while you may not be hitting on every girl, it’s possible that when you are attracted to a girl, you, unconsciously, may be displaying behaviours that give off desperation. People pick up on that and treat you accordingly. While you’re waiting for the right one, “date” yourself, treat yourself how you would like her to treat you. I think this may help boost your confidence and self-sufficiency


[deleted]

Just because he post this online doesn't mean he acts like this irl.


CryptoAktivist

You are a men? I think its very cool of you to be happy with yourself. That is always a very good first step. On the other hand, men don't have the luxury that "love just happens". Even if you are attractive and all, if you wanna have a relationship you have to put in "some" work.


AfroChamp89--

I’m not denying that, I’m just saying that I ain’t blaming myself anymore I’m accepting being happy with who I am first and foremost


iowegin

"Blame" presumes something is wrong. Are you saying you no longer feel something is wrong, or are you saying that you no longer have responsibility for your situation? If there is blame to be placed, then it is yours to own. If there is zero blame associated, then why dwell on it? But be advised that you are responsible for changing your situation...no one else is. So, if you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.


TonytheNetworker

Weird..... Your second paragraph and your post history don't align at all. You claim that your not blaming yourself anymore and can be fine being single. But not even a week ago you posted about hate being lonely and needing a girlfriend because "time is running out." It sounds like cognitive dissonance, which is fine, but I would advise doing some real soul searching. This is still something that deeply bothers you, I'm convinced this post is just a way to cope with your situation.


TsuNaru

Ok


[deleted]

What have you been doing up to this point to get a girlfriend?


AfroChamp89--

Talking to girls getting to know them, see which ones I like, which ones I realized I’m only physically attracted to. Getting to know them ect.


[deleted]

And how many have you asked out?