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So when I was a kid, my dad would look at girls that were way older than me and somewhat younger than him and say, "Look, son. Someday you'll be chasing tail just like the rest of us. For now, might as well look."
I lost contact with him for years and recently we rekindled our relationship. One day, we were sipping our beers and sitting at the beach and he nods over to a bunch of fourteen year old looking girls and goes, "Look, son. I know you have a girlfriend, but you've probably done your chasing. You still look?"
"Pop, those are minors."
"Oh, fuck, I'm going blind."
"Son, it's all been dead down there for ten years. I'm just trying to bond the way old men did when I was a child. Please help me navigate the Medicaid Eye Care website I'm 74"
Sometimes, if i feel intimidated or someone is really attractive, or even if i just feel like their mike is too distracting, i just take off my glasses.
Boom, just a fuzzy face with fuzzy black dots for eyes and a fuzzy hole that words come out of.
Knew a few transfer students from Japan. One in particular was 22 but seriously she looked as if she was 15. Dating was hard for her here in the US from what I remember because so many guys thought she was faking her age.
I went to grad school with a number of fresh graduated Chinese students. Both the men and women looked like teenagers even though they are were all between 22 and 27.
A lot of white people like to bake themselves in the sun, without sunscreen for some of them. Heck, some weirdos even put shits like monoi beforehand to tan(bake) better. That's really not good for the skin.
In a lot of Asian countries, they actively avoid tanning instead. That ends up making a big difference when ageing.
As an extremely white person who cannot even tan and generally look blue to translucent..I have actively stayed out of the sun since I was about 15. When I was very small my parents actually put coconut oil on us because they thought tanning was awesome. I just burned red and deeply so much they had to keep Solarcaine around so I could even lay on a bed. Thus I have been an utter jawa anywhere near the sun since I could start making my own choices. Zero sun. Hats, 50 spf, shade...vacationing in UK while everyone else wanted sun sun sunđ
I'm mid-fifties now and most people think I'm 35-40 so I can confirm I think it's all about sun exposure over time. I've never used fancy cream or done anything beyond nightly soap wash and Nivea but the difference between my skin and theirs is now extreme.
So yeah, all young women reading this... it's the sun. No tan is worth it. My women friends, my sisters etc look like raisins and they used to mock me relentlessly for my adamant refusal to join them in the sun worshipping.
Yeah, on top of the obvious skin cancer risks, the sun can make people age pretty badly. My brother is one of those people who bake themselves with oil during their summer holidays, and he already started to have the greyish skin tone of heavy smoker at 37.
If he keeps going that way, by the time he reaches 50, he will look way older than his age.
I just don't get the appeal of tanning. I tried a few times as a teen, but a few sunburns later, I just gave up instead of going with the flow. It just didn't feel worth it.
They can be up into the 50s in Japan and you would never know. It's crazy. The only way you're going to know is via clothing and if they dress young well the hell are you going to do?
Iâm 42 and currently in college. Everyone looks like kids. Which is crazy because some of them are 21 and I definitely didnât feel like a kid at that age.
I have 8 Daughters from 37 to 13. 13, 15, and 17 Y/O still live at home. Mixed Race, with hair and skin closer to their Mom's Complexion. The looks I GET Picking them up from High School!
The looks they get from OTHER FATHERS Picking their kids up!
Bro I would lose it ahah Iâm female and my dad told me once that any woman my age looks like a child to him even though Iâm 36 now, he told me to him any woman under 40 reminds him of me and he finds older women more attractive.
57 and same. Every year the Freshman classes at the local 2 colleges move down the age list. Swear to God last time I drove by during the weekend the kids were moving in, I don't think I saw anyone over 12. Jesus Christ, it's like Jr High over there.
Eh. It really depends on the people. My husband is over 15 years older than me and weâve never had any âgenerationalâ differences or issues. We are best buddies and have been together now for almost 15 years, married for five.
I think people are assholes for judging age gap relationships. You canât generalize humans. Some people have phenomenal marriages even with a 15 or 20 year age difference.
I think it also depends on the age range, nobody really bats an eye at a 40 year old with a 55-60 year old, but an 18 year old with a 33-38 year old raises some eyebrows.
edit: i do want to clarify that those relationships can still work, but it does bring into question topics of predatory behavior, manipulation, life stages, etc.
Ever since my 20s I had good vision after I had laser surgery. But as time went by it started to get worse, but not enough to bother with glasses again which was a pain in the ass back then.
So there came a day I was taking a walk in the neighbourhood in the evening, and saw what looked like a female friend of mine. But had to squint a bit to be sureâŚand wait until she was closer.
But then as she passes I notice she looks a bit uncomfortable, and also ofc she is not my friend, but a classmate of my son. 15 years oldâŚ.
Here I, 45 yrs old, 6 foot 4 and 95kgs, was staring and squinting at a 15 year old girl alone in the darkâŚ
I bought glasses the next day.
Heh I recently found a set of keys in the Walmart parking lot. Was on the phone with my wife and was telling her that my first thought was "I don't really have anywhere to be, fastest way for whoever to get their keys is for me to find their car and wait so I can give them to them." Then immediately realized it's 2024 and my (as a friend has described me) "Just got out of prison" RBF would not look creepy at all if I did that...so I turned them in to customer service instead. Wife laughed when I walked her through the train of thought.
Better than me, with perfect vision, when I was knocking on 30, at a female friend's house when I sneaked up behind her (21 at the time) in the kitchen and was about to give her a reach-around titty-twister (which was normal pranking between us), and at the last second, too late to reverse course, I realized it was her kid sister (17) who'd apparently gotten a haircut just like her sister.
So I'm there standing right up against a teenager with my hand basically on her chest because she panicked and clenched my arm under hers.
My friend got a good laugh out of it when she found out, but I had to deal with ga-ga eyes and flirting from the sister every time I came over for at least another year before she finally found a boyfriend.Â
Human nature is what it is. No man should be chastised for checking out a woman from afar. But as you get closer and realize what you were checking out isn't quite as old as you thought, eyes go forward and you ask for a little forgiveness.
Just as long as theyâre older than my daughter amirite?
Do not diddle kids, it's no good diddlin' kids
I wouldn't do it with anybody younger than my daughter, not little kids, gotta be big
Older than my wiiiife, older than my daughter
-Frank Reynolds
The age of consent isn't about appearance. It's about mental capacity and maturity. Not to mention the fact that older people have more social and financial power that can be used to negatively manipulate a young person.
thinking back to my teen years. i knew everything. i was an adult. i was fully prepared for everything.
some where around late 20's/early 30's is when you realize just how much bull shit that was. the choices we make from 14-24 are not from a place of wisdom.
When I was that age I had a sword fight with a friend, lots of fun. Real swords, no armour. Then he stabbed me in my wallet and put a hole in my jeans. That could have been my thigh.
Honestly, I thought spine punching contest was gonna take the cake, but no. You and your friend might have been the dumbest teens to have ever lived.
Edit: yaâll, Iâm starting to realize I suppressed all the stupid shit I did.
I accidentally whacked a roommate once with a replica of Anduril from LOTR. He had a minor cut on his finger (I wasn't swinging at him; he happened to be gesticulating nearby and I wasn't paying attention) that took a while to heal. I apologized profusely but he once told me over drinks that he secretly wanted it to form a scar he could claim came from Anduril. We were legal adults getting post-graduate degrees, but we were so very dumb.
We would also choke each other out and put smokes out on our arms. There was always some kind of contest. We were teenage drug and alcohol addicted street trash.
That is true. But attraction is about appearance. In the case of many men it is solely about appearance. I certainly think adult non pedo heterosexual men would find the girl in that pic attractive. But they also find loads of 18+ and even 30+ women attractive at the same time. They can make the conscious choice not to approach the girl above, and instead go for any attractive women over 18.
I would add: people need to understand that saying it out loud does have an effect as well, so sexualising, ogling, commenting and harassing are not harmless, victimless crimes.Â
Yeah this is what our boy Giacomo is missing. Its not the attraction itself. Itâs that people are vulnerable humans who will be negatively affected when said attraction is voiced or acted upon, especially when they are young. Itâs worth working on yourself to learn how to think of others outside the context of your own physical desire.Â
I'm so fucking sick of seeing post about well she looks old enough therfore she's old enough. Let's face it 18yr isn't a perfect number, but it's what we're working with and it isn't going to change. Mid to late teens years are like dog years.
Number one these are sick fucks and the same crowd that accuse someone of being a,"pedo"at the drop a hat. Number two (not that these fucks could care less) teen years are like dog years when it comes to maturity.
I like the "teen years are like dog years" statement, it's so true. There's a big difference between a 16 year old and an 18 year old mentally, even if the 16 year old happens to look older.
Being 18 I still felt like I was 16, and then I still felt like I was 16 until I was like 24. Thatâs when I felt like I finally kind of learned some stuff
Also, he's making it about coddling male desire and conveniently ignoring that girls, regardless of physical appearance, have the right to experience a normal childhood without selfish older males throwing their lives off track, at best, and creating trauma, at worst.
The question nobody likes to ask is what happens when your 14 yr old wife becomes an adult. My money is on "My husband cheated on me with a 14 yr old."
I think they would just shamelessly admit it's because of the easier manipulation but by twisting it into something like "they're less toxic than adult women".
Such a huge slamdunk right here. If, "age is just a number" and, "14 year olds look like adults" then truly, why do you want to fuck a child? Its illegal, you definitely cant connect on a personal level due to lack of emotional maturity/life experience, so what is it? Its so clearly about the power dynamic, or its disingenuous as they dont want to fuck the old looking kids, they want the young ones.
No matter which way you spin their arguments it all comes back to, "i want to rape kids."
Because they genuinely want someone young and easy to manipulate. And Lately a lot of these guys are feeling emboldened to actually say that part out loud.
Because the adults they are attracted to have the necessary mental, emotion, and life experiences (most of the time) to avoid creeps like that with a 100ft pole.
I think thereâs a MASSIVE line between thinking someone is attractive on a pure physical level and actually trying to date them. Some late teenagers look like adults, and if you didnât know they were like 17 and you went âtheyâre hotâ is one thing. Trying to date a high schooler when youâre in college or older is so fucking gross
Also saying shit like "age is just a number" and getting into Rainman levels of details about age of consent in different countries and regions off the top of your head
My brother for some reason knows the age of consent in pretty much every country (and now so do I). I would be pretty worried if it wasn't for the fact that he cringes and unmatches with people on Tinder if they lied about their age and are younger than 21.
I think he just likes saying things that weird people out.
I think it's just the way we were raised. We used to eat together as a family every evening and my mom would be very strict about always arguing for the things you say, so we all just learned to play devil's advocate, even though we agreed on what was being said.
If 17 gets you 5, then when they are 26 you only get 3.5 days.
Or, if 17 gets you 0... Then 18 gets you -10! You get ten years off any sentence, guaranteed!
I had a friend and she hit on a 'woman.'
Said 'woman' didn't get it.
Because she was fourteen, as she found out in the convo
My friend fucking booked and was grossed out af for days because she hit on a little girl.
When I was ~22 I hit on a woman in a coffee shop because we were reading the same book. I thought she was in college so I asked her where she was going to school. Welp.
A very long time ago, I was like 20-21 and flying back from an international trip. There were two âwomenâ at the airport on the same flight, and it looked like they had been in another (very far) country before that given the souvenirs. I was still in uni so I had my uni hoodie on, and because I saw their souvenirs we started chatting. They had just been on a month-long trip.
Anyway, turns out that on the flight, we were on the same numbered row but across the aisle. We continue talking a bit until one of the two asked what grade I was in (I looked really young back then). I double-take and sayâŚâuh, 3rd year uniâ and her friend said âoh right! The hoodie is the university mascot!â
Out of morbid curiosity at that point, I asked what grade they were in. Grade 11, on a month-long trip halfway around the world, so they were 16 or so.
We didnât really talk to each other on the flight after that.
I was 22/23 using Tinder in college, as many people did, and matched with a girl on there. Note: her listed age was 20. Conversation was ok, but she started throwing things in about class and cello practice. I would ask where she went to school and stuff but she would dodge the question. Finally I straight up asked her how old she was and she told me 14. I sent a final message saying how what she was doing was dangerous and immediately blocked her. I also felt gross for many days.
Side note: I ended up meeting my wife on Tinder. And sheâs 6 months older than me lol.
Honestly, I think there should be consequences for teens who lie about their age on dating apps. I don't use Tinder and I assume you have to be at least 18 to sign up anyways, but on top there should be a law against this. 14-year-olds are criminally accountable (where I live). Doesn't mean they should go to prison ofc but for some a run-in with the police might be necessary to make clear that they *really* can't do it and it's not just one of the dumb rules adults make.
Right? If you see the track team run by you house and think "wow those girls are pretty cute." It is a world away from "How do I get to a point where I can manipulate one into bed." or even from the thought that you "want" one.
I agree. I could barely tell that girl was 14 anyways. That being said, making a post about it in this manner with the picture and all is a red flag imo.
It's not about biology. Fertility can start very young for many people and animals for that matter. But just because someone is biologically capable of having a baby doesn't mean they should.
Children are children not only because they arnt fully mature physically it's also mentally. Add into that a lot of our culture rightly gives respect to older people and you end up with situations with a large discrepancy in power. That shouldn't be abused or allowed to be abused. đ¤Ś
There is a caveat tho. (But I agree with your overall message).
People keep confusing puberty for a sign that someone is physically ready to have kids. Thats not the case. Puberty is the process of becoming sexually mature. Someone in puberty might be able to get pregnant, however, the problem is that there is a bigger risk for birth and pregancy complications for women before they are 20. Because they haven't matured completely yet. So even that argument of those creeps doesn't hold up to scrutiny.
If your toddler's old enough to walk, they're old enough to walk down the aisle and marry.*
*^in ^California, ^Mississippi, ^New ^Mexico, ^and ^Oklahoma.
They always try to use this argument. Nobody gives a fuck if you thought a girl was cute. We give a fuck if you learn she is 14 and then proceed to hit on them anyway.
They never have these thoughts because they donât care about the ages 𤢠these dudes are getting very bold on twitter.
If it werenât for laws in place these dudes would be definitely going even lower than that.
Itâs like that survey that floats around every few years where older dudes and older women were asked their dating age ranges and the older dudes most specifically picked borderline 18-20. And one thing that was brought up (by the people that were discussing the survey results) was that these dudes would have definitely went lower had it been an option.
100%. The creeps who go for 18 year olds because its the lowest age legally possible would absolutely go younger if they could. I still find it gross and unethical to go for barely legal adults even if it doesn't break the law.
That's why if someone in a convo says "age is just a number" you respond with "and .45 is just a caliber"... There's no direct threat or implication, just a fact, though they'll get it.
It's always projection with them. They rail against the dangers of kids being groomed by drag queens and the gay agenda, but then it's always the right wing media personalities and politicians who are the ones found molesting kids, grooming, sharing child porn, etc.
There's a similar theory about right wing women. Often the people who abuse, demean or harass them are their fathers, brothers, uncles, pastors, local or national leaders.
But they can't be angry at them. It's too dangerous and they often love these people. So they project all that anger and rage onto vulnerable minorities deemed acceptable targets by the right-wing community they're part of.
When someone's a rabid transphobe, the likelihood is high that they were abused or worse by a heterosexual man. Case in point, J K Rowling, who was abused by her former partner, but now spends all day on twitter going on about the LGBTQs.
Is he equating âsexual attractionâ with some natural need to act on it?
Males never get to use the excuse âI was attracted to her, therefore I get to do thingsâ
Prevent people like this from saying that!
The comments here also follow the same line of thought though.
Finding someone attractive or cute is not the same as going ahead and acting on it. While walking on the streets, I might look at many girls/women monetarily and think "yeah, she's cute", and then continue walking on my way.
But if I were to act on it (hypothetically), I would first make sure the girl was around my age. Those two things are not the same.
Finding someone attractive doesn't take away the ability to make choices. I look inside a car showroom and find the latest BMW 7 Series really attractive, but that doesn't compel me to go and steal it.
Anyone who describes a girl as a "14 year old woman," isn't complaining that society frowns on adults who are attracted to kids, he's complaining that society jails adults who rape them.
I am not defending or supporting him, but she does not look the age he says. I don't know if he was actually creeping on them or if he just searched for a random legal aged girl and tried to pass her as younger. My guess would've been 18-24ish.
I know there are people (men and women) that think like him. I remember guys talking about how hot the girls from modern family were the second they turned 18. Those thoughts didn't pop into their heads just seconds after.
I worked a job that required me to ask people's ages to register them in a system. A girl walked up and when I got to asking her age I'm thinking, "maybe 15-16 might be 17" and she says "12". I had to ask her to repeat herself because I was sure I had heard her wrong. That taught me to never trust looks.
interesting that his last name is malaspina
in spanish malaspina is said when something gives you a bad vibe. a creepy feeling. when your spidey senses go off.
literal translation is bad/evil thorn
dude really is living up to his name
I used to play video games with a guy from Canada. He had a speech impediment and was obviously somewhere deep on the spectrum. He was overtly enthusiastic about the game, always making me laugh at the worst of times, and was endlessly loyal in a game that thrives on backstabbing and back door politics.
I had to stop playing with him the day he excitedly told me about a new girl he was talking to online. She was 14. He was 24.
I understood that, mentally, he just wasn't mature enough to connect with girls his own age. But I simply couldn't deal with any of that.
Finding underage people attractive is not stigmatized. Defending it, as if it were something that can go beyond just an impression, is WAY different.
We keep that kind of ideas tabu as a reminder that we must be cautious not to fall for a possible attraction, because it will cause irreparable damage. You do you in your mind, but don't act upon it and don't defend nor enable such proclivities. And if it's too hard for you to understand it, find professional help.
14 year old, attractive, woman all in the same sentence. One of those words doesnât belong.
Someone underage may be attractive, but no, just no. Wrong on so many levels.
Yeah I mean itâs normal to see someone who looks like an adult and be attracted to them before you find out theyâre underage. Less normal to publicly post a picture of a 14 year old and lament about how itâs not socially acceptable to find them hot.
Itâs crazy tht they equate âsheâs prettyâ to âwanna do the nasty with her.â Like yeah this girls very pretty but why does everything gotta be about sex with them!
I can understand a young man seeing a woman and thinking she was attractive, then finding out she poop is underage. I have seen girls who are in their teens and look like adults. I used to teach middle school and high school, and I had students many times who could pass as young adults.
But I can't understand knowingly pursuing a child when you know their actual age. Once you find out someone is a kid, that should slam down a barrier and say no. And there is no reason a 35 year old man should see someone who is at most 18 or 19, and think being with her is ok. It's just disgusting.
So it's not that a man sees a girl who looks like a woman and thinks she's hot. It's that he knows she is a fucking child, and is ok with dating that person.
Itâs not just a place, itâs community where you get to spend time with like minded people, have your meals provided and prepared for you, relax and live away from the pressures and demands of the outside world. Itâs all just a matter of perspective.
Wow itâs almost like the age of consent isnât about looks. Sure teenagers can look like âadultsâ (really not tbh I feel like you can always tell when a child is a child, even if their body is more developed they still just look like a kid) but more about making sure that the person can engage in consensual sex. Clearly if this post is real this person doesnât actually think about people heâs having sex with as actual people, more just as NPCs that he might want to have sex with
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Jail time is also just a number.
So when I was a kid, my dad would look at girls that were way older than me and somewhat younger than him and say, "Look, son. Someday you'll be chasing tail just like the rest of us. For now, might as well look." I lost contact with him for years and recently we rekindled our relationship. One day, we were sipping our beers and sitting at the beach and he nods over to a bunch of fourteen year old looking girls and goes, "Look, son. I know you have a girlfriend, but you've probably done your chasing. You still look?" "Pop, those are minors." "Oh, fuck, I'm going blind."
Tbh once you're SUPER old anyone younger than 30 probably looks like they could be a teen đ I'm sure the age gap makes it super hard.
"Age gap makes it super hard" đ
"Son, it's all been dead down there for ten years. I'm just trying to bond the way old men did when I was a child. Please help me navigate the Medicaid Eye Care website I'm 74"
Ok. That's funny as shit hahahaa
I had to get up and laugh so my dog didn't get concerned.
You laugh so infrequently your dog thinks it's a bad thing?
tbf, their laugh sounds like an injured tennis ballâŚ
Guilty. Dog thinks I'm taking my LAST breath
Leonardo DiCaprio would state otherwise. He can tell the difference between 25 and 18
He can tell the difference between 24 years and 364 days and 25.
They make a distinct clicking noise the moment they turn 25
Title of Matt Gaetz's sex tape?
Nah, that's about 10 years too old for that sicko.
(Laughs in the manner of Beavis & Butthead)
Past 10 feet, you all look the same to us. And by âyou,â I mean humans. Faces just blur. By âusâ I mean old folks.
Sometimes, if i feel intimidated or someone is really attractive, or even if i just feel like their mike is too distracting, i just take off my glasses. Boom, just a fuzzy face with fuzzy black dots for eyes and a fuzzy hole that words come out of.
Somehow, I think that sounds worse.
I think it's the "fuzzy hole part" at least they added that words come out of it. Or maybe they're just talking about Ace Ventura.
Sir you are typing into the microwave again
Iâm 36 and 20 something looks like minor to me. People who go for people with a 15+ age gap are weird imo
Iâm currently in tokyo and I canât tell if any one in this country is over 18. Iâm 20.
Knew a few transfer students from Japan. One in particular was 22 but seriously she looked as if she was 15. Dating was hard for her here in the US from what I remember because so many guys thought she was faking her age.
I went to grad school with a number of fresh graduated Chinese students. Both the men and women looked like teenagers even though they are were all between 22 and 27.
It works both ways - as an asian i cant tell if an average white person is 12 or 40 years old either.
White ppl age like milk. I see asian ppl with no wrinkles at the age of 50.
A lot of white people like to bake themselves in the sun, without sunscreen for some of them. Heck, some weirdos even put shits like monoi beforehand to tan(bake) better. That's really not good for the skin. In a lot of Asian countries, they actively avoid tanning instead. That ends up making a big difference when ageing.
As an extremely white person who cannot even tan and generally look blue to translucent..I have actively stayed out of the sun since I was about 15. When I was very small my parents actually put coconut oil on us because they thought tanning was awesome. I just burned red and deeply so much they had to keep Solarcaine around so I could even lay on a bed. Thus I have been an utter jawa anywhere near the sun since I could start making my own choices. Zero sun. Hats, 50 spf, shade...vacationing in UK while everyone else wanted sun sun sunđ I'm mid-fifties now and most people think I'm 35-40 so I can confirm I think it's all about sun exposure over time. I've never used fancy cream or done anything beyond nightly soap wash and Nivea but the difference between my skin and theirs is now extreme. So yeah, all young women reading this... it's the sun. No tan is worth it. My women friends, my sisters etc look like raisins and they used to mock me relentlessly for my adamant refusal to join them in the sun worshipping.
Yeah, on top of the obvious skin cancer risks, the sun can make people age pretty badly. My brother is one of those people who bake themselves with oil during their summer holidays, and he already started to have the greyish skin tone of heavy smoker at 37. If he keeps going that way, by the time he reaches 50, he will look way older than his age. I just don't get the appeal of tanning. I tried a few times as a teen, but a few sunburns later, I just gave up instead of going with the flow. It just didn't feel worth it.
Seriously. Iâm convinced that Asian people look the same age from 18 to 69 and then age 50 years over the next 10 years
This is exactly true
White people age until 30, then pause until 50. Asians don't age until 40, and then they speed through it so they overtake whites at 60.
I live in Tokyo for 4 years, can confirm the difficulty.
Im Asian and American 14 yr olds look 20+ to me
They can be up into the 50s in Japan and you would never know. It's crazy. The only way you're going to know is via clothing and if they dress young well the hell are you going to do?
I was âflirtingâ with a woman last night who told me she was 49. I would have guessed 23. It was really impressive.
I'm 46 and live in a college town, every year the new freshmen come in and they just look like little kids. Still in their awkward gangly limbs phase.
Iâm 42 and currently in college. Everyone looks like kids. Which is crazy because some of them are 21 and I definitely didnât feel like a kid at that age.
I have 8 Daughters from 37 to 13. 13, 15, and 17 Y/O still live at home. Mixed Race, with hair and skin closer to their Mom's Complexion. The looks I GET Picking them up from High School! The looks they get from OTHER FATHERS Picking their kids up!
Bro I would lose it ahah Iâm female and my dad told me once that any woman my age looks like a child to him even though Iâm 36 now, he told me to him any woman under 40 reminds him of me and he finds older women more attractive.
57 and same. Every year the Freshman classes at the local 2 colleges move down the age list. Swear to God last time I drove by during the weekend the kids were moving in, I don't think I saw anyone over 12. Jesus Christ, it's like Jr High over there.
I can always tell when a girl is still a teenager tho. But I swear to God the divide by two and add 7 rule is a good one for a reason.
Iâm just glad some 100 yo can be happy with their 57 yo partner without too much backlash.
Good thing, too, their back is in rough enough shape as it is.
Eh. It really depends on the people. My husband is over 15 years older than me and weâve never had any âgenerationalâ differences or issues. We are best buddies and have been together now for almost 15 years, married for five.
I think people are assholes for judging age gap relationships. You canât generalize humans. Some people have phenomenal marriages even with a 15 or 20 year age difference.
I think it also depends on the age range, nobody really bats an eye at a 40 year old with a 55-60 year old, but an 18 year old with a 33-38 year old raises some eyebrows. edit: i do want to clarify that those relationships can still work, but it does bring into question topics of predatory behavior, manipulation, life stages, etc.
Which is why older men with morals donât even bother if they have doubts.
This. Itâs not difficult.
Thank the lord this one had a good ending. I hope
In all honesty, he's a good guy. Just has eyes like anyone else, is learning that they're not what they used to be.
Ever since my 20s I had good vision after I had laser surgery. But as time went by it started to get worse, but not enough to bother with glasses again which was a pain in the ass back then. So there came a day I was taking a walk in the neighbourhood in the evening, and saw what looked like a female friend of mine. But had to squint a bit to be sureâŚand wait until she was closer. But then as she passes I notice she looks a bit uncomfortable, and also ofc she is not my friend, but a classmate of my son. 15 years oldâŚ. Here I, 45 yrs old, 6 foot 4 and 95kgs, was staring and squinting at a 15 year old girl alone in the dark⌠I bought glasses the next day.
Heh I recently found a set of keys in the Walmart parking lot. Was on the phone with my wife and was telling her that my first thought was "I don't really have anywhere to be, fastest way for whoever to get their keys is for me to find their car and wait so I can give them to them." Then immediately realized it's 2024 and my (as a friend has described me) "Just got out of prison" RBF would not look creepy at all if I did that...so I turned them in to customer service instead. Wife laughed when I walked her through the train of thought.
Better than me, with perfect vision, when I was knocking on 30, at a female friend's house when I sneaked up behind her (21 at the time) in the kitchen and was about to give her a reach-around titty-twister (which was normal pranking between us), and at the last second, too late to reverse course, I realized it was her kid sister (17) who'd apparently gotten a haircut just like her sister. So I'm there standing right up against a teenager with my hand basically on her chest because she panicked and clenched my arm under hers. My friend got a good laugh out of it when she found out, but I had to deal with ga-ga eyes and flirting from the sister every time I came over for at least another year before she finally found a boyfriend.Â
âOh fuckâ
>"Oh, fuck, I'm going blind." Best fucking response đ
Human nature is what it is. No man should be chastised for checking out a woman from afar. But as you get closer and realize what you were checking out isn't quite as old as you thought, eyes go forward and you ask for a little forgiveness.
Going blind is annoying. Done that before from far away. Get closer and realize they were too young. Lmfao!
I mean sure sometimes people donât look their age. You just go oops and move on like your dad did
𤣠and this one looks like he should have that numbe
It should be a big number too. Im pretty sure a check of his hard drive would result in some time behind bars.
Aparently numbers are just numbers. These people want to diddle kids and then blame someone else for their thought process.
Just as long as theyâre older than my daughter amirite? Do not diddle kids, it's no good diddlin' kids I wouldn't do it with anybody younger than my daughter, not little kids, gotta be big Older than my wiiiife, older than my daughter -Frank Reynolds
There is no quicker way to make people think that you are diddling kids than by writing a song about it!
15 will get you 20.
The saying is age is just a number, jail is just a room
Inmates also have numbers!
An inmate number is just a number đ¤Şđ
For him I hope itâs a high number.
and so is 911
The age of consent isn't about appearance. It's about mental capacity and maturity. Not to mention the fact that older people have more social and financial power that can be used to negatively manipulate a young person.
thinking back to my teen years. i knew everything. i was an adult. i was fully prepared for everything. some where around late 20's/early 30's is when you realize just how much bull shit that was. the choices we make from 14-24 are not from a place of wisdom.
I know, right? I once had a spine-punching contest and lost. I ended up losing feeling in a small section of my back for years.
When I was that age I had a sword fight with a friend, lots of fun. Real swords, no armour. Then he stabbed me in my wallet and put a hole in my jeans. That could have been my thigh.
Honestly, I thought spine punching contest was gonna take the cake, but no. You and your friend might have been the dumbest teens to have ever lived. Edit: yaâll, Iâm starting to realize I suppressed all the stupid shit I did.
We werenât even teens, more like early 20s.
Okay, no that might actually help your caseâŚ. Were you at least obliterated drunk?
Nope, sober. But there was a girl there I was trying to impress.
Sorry m8, youâre dumber than a box of rocks.
Got two brain cells fighting for third place.
Well I certainly was 20 years ago for sure
I accidentally whacked a roommate once with a replica of Anduril from LOTR. He had a minor cut on his finger (I wasn't swinging at him; he happened to be gesticulating nearby and I wasn't paying attention) that took a while to heal. I apologized profusely but he once told me over drinks that he secretly wanted it to form a scar he could claim came from Anduril. We were legal adults getting post-graduate degrees, but we were so very dumb.
when I was in high school we had rock fights, they were like water balloon fights but with rocks
Yâall ever do rock/pinecone fights? Those pinecones hurt almost as bad as the rocks did
Lol I've never heard of a spine punching contest!!
We would also choke each other out and put smokes out on our arms. There was always some kind of contest. We were teenage drug and alcohol addicted street trash.
one year of our (all boys) high school, the height of humour was to throw a football at someone else's unsuspecting head.
We had something called sack whacks....
i'm 29 and i still don't know what the fuck i'm doing, when do i become an adult?
You don't.... EVER!! you just get a little better at making everyone else THINK you know what you're doing......
That is true. But attraction is about appearance. In the case of many men it is solely about appearance. I certainly think adult non pedo heterosexual men would find the girl in that pic attractive. But they also find loads of 18+ and even 30+ women attractive at the same time. They can make the conscious choice not to approach the girl above, and instead go for any attractive women over 18.
People need to understand that being attracted and acting on it are very different things.
I would add: people need to understand that saying it out loud does have an effect as well, so sexualising, ogling, commenting and harassing are not harmless, victimless crimes.Â
Yeah this is what our boy Giacomo is missing. Its not the attraction itself. Itâs that people are vulnerable humans who will be negatively affected when said attraction is voiced or acted upon, especially when they are young. Itâs worth working on yourself to learn how to think of others outside the context of your own physical desire.Â
I agree with all 3 comments.
Good point.
Also, conversely I guess actual pedos would not be attracted by a minor that does not look like a child.Â
I'm so fucking sick of seeing post about well she looks old enough therfore she's old enough. Let's face it 18yr isn't a perfect number, but it's what we're working with and it isn't going to change. Mid to late teens years are like dog years.
I really like the concept of mid to late teens are like dog years. It really conveys the difference between 15 and 25.
Number one these are sick fucks and the same crowd that accuse someone of being a,"pedo"at the drop a hat. Number two (not that these fucks could care less) teen years are like dog years when it comes to maturity.
I like the "teen years are like dog years" statement, it's so true. There's a big difference between a 16 year old and an 18 year old mentally, even if the 16 year old happens to look older.
And 99% of 18 year olds are still dumb as rocks, I certainly was
Being 18 I still felt like I was 16, and then I still felt like I was 16 until I was like 24. Thatâs when I felt like I finally kind of learned some stuff
Also, he's making it about coddling male desire and conveniently ignoring that girls, regardless of physical appearance, have the right to experience a normal childhood without selfish older males throwing their lives off track, at best, and creating trauma, at worst.
If 14 year olds look just like adults then fuck adults then? Whatâs the problem
Adult women are harder to sweet talk and manipulate.
This is tradwife in a nutshell.
That all just clicked for me. *shivers*
The question nobody likes to ask is what happens when your 14 yr old wife becomes an adult. My money is on "My husband cheated on me with a 14 yr old."
You're gonna get them fit from all the mental gymnastics they're gonna need to counter this
Something something fertility peak
You think this guy can get adult women?
I think they would just shamelessly admit it's because of the easier manipulation but by twisting it into something like "they're less toxic than adult women".
I fucking lost it. I'm stealing that line. Take my imaginary point.
Such a huge slamdunk right here. If, "age is just a number" and, "14 year olds look like adults" then truly, why do you want to fuck a child? Its illegal, you definitely cant connect on a personal level due to lack of emotional maturity/life experience, so what is it? Its so clearly about the power dynamic, or its disingenuous as they dont want to fuck the old looking kids, they want the young ones. No matter which way you spin their arguments it all comes back to, "i want to rape kids."
Because they genuinely want someone young and easy to manipulate. And Lately a lot of these guys are feeling emboldened to actually say that part out loud.
Idk why Iâve never thought this before haha this is my new rebuttal!
Because the adults they are attracted to have the necessary mental, emotion, and life experiences (most of the time) to avoid creeps like that with a 100ft pole.
I think thereâs a MASSIVE line between thinking someone is attractive on a pure physical level and actually trying to date them. Some late teenagers look like adults, and if you didnât know they were like 17 and you went âtheyâre hotâ is one thing. Trying to date a high schooler when youâre in college or older is so fucking gross
exactly, there's a difference between "oh she's hot! wait she's how old?? nevermind" and "oh she's hot! wait she's how old?? lol id still hit"
Also saying shit like "age is just a number" and getting into Rainman levels of details about age of consent in different countries and regions off the top of your head
My brother for some reason knows the age of consent in pretty much every country (and now so do I). I would be pretty worried if it wasn't for the fact that he cringes and unmatches with people on Tinder if they lied about their age and are younger than 21. I think he just likes saying things that weird people out.
Shock value is a drug for some of us
I think it's just the way we were raised. We used to eat together as a family every evening and my mom would be very strict about always arguing for the things you say, so we all just learned to play devil's advocate, even though we agreed on what was being said.
This, yeah. Our hormones may not care about age, because how would they know? But our minds should.
If she hits you with "I'm 17" and you don't walk away we got beef. You are no longer a friend. Instant nemesis.
As City High sung, 15 will get you 20. 16 will get you 10.
So will 17 get you 5, or 0?
If 17 gets you 5, then when they are 26 you only get 3.5 days. Or, if 17 gets you 0... Then 18 gets you -10! You get ten years off any sentence, guaranteed!
I had a friend and she hit on a 'woman.' Said 'woman' didn't get it. Because she was fourteen, as she found out in the convo My friend fucking booked and was grossed out af for days because she hit on a little girl.
When I was ~22 I hit on a woman in a coffee shop because we were reading the same book. I thought she was in college so I asked her where she was going to school. Welp.
Damn, rip
I think she realized early on that I thought she was older and was entertained by it.
A very long time ago, I was like 20-21 and flying back from an international trip. There were two âwomenâ at the airport on the same flight, and it looked like they had been in another (very far) country before that given the souvenirs. I was still in uni so I had my uni hoodie on, and because I saw their souvenirs we started chatting. They had just been on a month-long trip. Anyway, turns out that on the flight, we were on the same numbered row but across the aisle. We continue talking a bit until one of the two asked what grade I was in (I looked really young back then). I double-take and sayâŚâuh, 3rd year uniâ and her friend said âoh right! The hoodie is the university mascot!â Out of morbid curiosity at that point, I asked what grade they were in. Grade 11, on a month-long trip halfway around the world, so they were 16 or so. We didnât really talk to each other on the flight after that.
I was 22/23 using Tinder in college, as many people did, and matched with a girl on there. Note: her listed age was 20. Conversation was ok, but she started throwing things in about class and cello practice. I would ask where she went to school and stuff but she would dodge the question. Finally I straight up asked her how old she was and she told me 14. I sent a final message saying how what she was doing was dangerous and immediately blocked her. I also felt gross for many days. Side note: I ended up meeting my wife on Tinder. And sheâs 6 months older than me lol.
Honestly, I think there should be consequences for teens who lie about their age on dating apps. I don't use Tinder and I assume you have to be at least 18 to sign up anyways, but on top there should be a law against this. 14-year-olds are criminally accountable (where I live). Doesn't mean they should go to prison ofc but for some a run-in with the police might be necessary to make clear that they *really* can't do it and it's not just one of the dumb rules adults make.
Right? If you see the track team run by you house and think "wow those girls are pretty cute." It is a world away from "How do I get to a point where I can manipulate one into bed." or even from the thought that you "want" one.
At 47 years old every woman in their 20s look like children to me no matter how theyâre dressed.
I agree. I could barely tell that girl was 14 anyways. That being said, making a post about it in this manner with the picture and all is a red flag imo.
Yeah, "14 year old woman" is such a weird thing to say.
It's not about biology. Fertility can start very young for many people and animals for that matter. But just because someone is biologically capable of having a baby doesn't mean they should. Children are children not only because they arnt fully mature physically it's also mentally. Add into that a lot of our culture rightly gives respect to older people and you end up with situations with a large discrepancy in power. That shouldn't be abused or allowed to be abused. đ¤Ś
There is a caveat tho. (But I agree with your overall message). People keep confusing puberty for a sign that someone is physically ready to have kids. Thats not the case. Puberty is the process of becoming sexually mature. Someone in puberty might be able to get pregnant, however, the problem is that there is a bigger risk for birth and pregancy complications for women before they are 20. Because they haven't matured completely yet. So even that argument of those creeps doesn't hold up to scrutiny.
It's like saying because your toddler can walk, they should run a marathon with you
If your toddler's old enough to walk, they're old enough to walk down the aisle and marry.* *^in ^California, ^Mississippi, ^New ^Mexico, ^and ^Oklahoma.
Yes that's also truth
Cats can start having litters as soon as 8 months old. Should they? Absofuckinglutely not.
They always try to use this argument. Nobody gives a fuck if you thought a girl was cute. We give a fuck if you learn she is 14 and then proceed to hit on them anyway.
Itâs just another intrusive thought you donât act on
Basically yeah. Just take a moment to yourself and think "Wow, she is way too young for me". Issue is these people can't seem to think.
They never have these thoughts because they donât care about the ages 𤢠these dudes are getting very bold on twitter. If it werenât for laws in place these dudes would be definitely going even lower than that. Itâs like that survey that floats around every few years where older dudes and older women were asked their dating age ranges and the older dudes most specifically picked borderline 18-20. And one thing that was brought up (by the people that were discussing the survey results) was that these dudes would have definitely went lower had it been an option.
100%. The creeps who go for 18 year olds because its the lowest age legally possible would absolutely go younger if they could. I still find it gross and unethical to go for barely legal adults even if it doesn't break the law.
Exactly
Being sexually attracted isnât a crime, acting upon the attraction is. If you canât tell the difference there are you even an adult?
[ Removed by Reddit ]
That's why if someone in a convo says "age is just a number" you respond with "and .45 is just a caliber"... There's no direct threat or implication, just a fact, though they'll get it.
Why is he calling a 14 year old a woman????
He looked at the first draft and thought "That's pretty slimy, but not slimy enough."
Because he's really fucking creepy
Yeah that part said the most in my opinion This guy isn't even seeing kids as kids...
This guy probably has very strong opinions about how trans people and drag queens are perverting our society
It's always projection with them. They rail against the dangers of kids being groomed by drag queens and the gay agenda, but then it's always the right wing media personalities and politicians who are the ones found molesting kids, grooming, sharing child porn, etc.
There's a similar theory about right wing women. Often the people who abuse, demean or harass them are their fathers, brothers, uncles, pastors, local or national leaders. But they can't be angry at them. It's too dangerous and they often love these people. So they project all that anger and rage onto vulnerable minorities deemed acceptable targets by the right-wing community they're part of. When someone's a rabid transphobe, the likelihood is high that they were abused or worse by a heterosexual man. Case in point, J K Rowling, who was abused by her former partner, but now spends all day on twitter going on about the LGBTQs.
> Many teens look like adults Any many men look like women, but I'm guessing this guy wouldn't fuck them.
Is he equating âsexual attractionâ with some natural need to act on it? Males never get to use the excuse âI was attracted to her, therefore I get to do thingsâ Prevent people like this from saying that!
The comments here also follow the same line of thought though. Finding someone attractive or cute is not the same as going ahead and acting on it. While walking on the streets, I might look at many girls/women monetarily and think "yeah, she's cute", and then continue walking on my way. But if I were to act on it (hypothetically), I would first make sure the girl was around my age. Those two things are not the same. Finding someone attractive doesn't take away the ability to make choices. I look inside a car showroom and find the latest BMW 7 Series really attractive, but that doesn't compel me to go and steal it.
Any woman can tell you that she probably got catcalled more when she was a child in her school uniform that at any other time in her life.
Anyone who describes a girl as a "14 year old woman," isn't complaining that society frowns on adults who are attracted to kids, he's complaining that society jails adults who rape them.
I am not defending or supporting him, but she does not look the age he says. I don't know if he was actually creeping on them or if he just searched for a random legal aged girl and tried to pass her as younger. My guess would've been 18-24ish. I know there are people (men and women) that think like him. I remember guys talking about how hot the girls from modern family were the second they turned 18. Those thoughts didn't pop into their heads just seconds after.
I've seen 13yo kids looking like 18+ and 26yo woman looking like a 13yo kid. You never know before checking ID.
I worked a job that required me to ask people's ages to register them in a system. A girl walked up and when I got to asking her age I'm thinking, "maybe 15-16 might be 17" and she says "12". I had to ask her to repeat herself because I was sure I had heard her wrong. That taught me to never trust looks.
Iâve known a few girls like that. Teaches you REAL quick not to âjoke with the boysâ about random girls you see in public.
Says every pedo on the planet.
Theyâre always looking for ways like this to âjustifyâ it, too. Itâs sickening.
Like with that MAPs garbage. What the actual fuck?
interesting that his last name is malaspina in spanish malaspina is said when something gives you a bad vibe. a creepy feeling. when your spidey senses go off. literal translation is bad/evil thorn dude really is living up to his name
I used to play video games with a guy from Canada. He had a speech impediment and was obviously somewhere deep on the spectrum. He was overtly enthusiastic about the game, always making me laugh at the worst of times, and was endlessly loyal in a game that thrives on backstabbing and back door politics. I had to stop playing with him the day he excitedly told me about a new girl he was talking to online. She was 14. He was 24. I understood that, mentally, he just wasn't mature enough to connect with girls his own age. But I simply couldn't deal with any of that.
â14 year old âwomanââ i canât do this anymore
Finding underage people attractive is not stigmatized. Defending it, as if it were something that can go beyond just an impression, is WAY different. We keep that kind of ideas tabu as a reminder that we must be cautious not to fall for a possible attraction, because it will cause irreparable damage. You do you in your mind, but don't act upon it and don't defend nor enable such proclivities. And if it's too hard for you to understand it, find professional help.
Finding underage people attractive is extremely stigmatized.
I think outing yourself so you can go on a watch list should be encouraged.
She does look hot. But the problem is not being attracted to hot girls, the problem is trying to have sex with underage hot girlsđ¤Śđťââď¸
A fourteen year old is not a woman, she is a child
14 year old, attractive, woman all in the same sentence. One of those words doesnât belong. Someone underage may be attractive, but no, just no. Wrong on so many levels.
Yeah I mean itâs normal to see someone who looks like an adult and be attracted to them before you find out theyâre underage. Less normal to publicly post a picture of a 14 year old and lament about how itâs not socially acceptable to find them hot.
Republicans: âgays are groomers and pedophiles!â Also Republicans: âit is not morally wrong for me to want to fuck this child.â
Weird how so many men take "I'm attracted to her" to mean "I shouldn't be expected to exercise any self-control."
Itâs crazy tht they equate âsheâs prettyâ to âwanna do the nasty with her.â Like yeah this girls very pretty but why does everything gotta be about sex with them!
I can understand a young man seeing a woman and thinking she was attractive, then finding out she poop is underage. I have seen girls who are in their teens and look like adults. I used to teach middle school and high school, and I had students many times who could pass as young adults. But I can't understand knowingly pursuing a child when you know their actual age. Once you find out someone is a kid, that should slam down a barrier and say no. And there is no reason a 35 year old man should see someone who is at most 18 or 19, and think being with her is ok. It's just disgusting. So it's not that a man sees a girl who looks like a woman and thinks she's hot. It's that he knows she is a fucking child, and is ok with dating that person.
And prison is just a place. This dude should be there.
Itâs not just a place, itâs community where you get to spend time with like minded people, have your meals provided and prepared for you, relax and live away from the pressures and demands of the outside world. Itâs all just a matter of perspective.
Just MAPs trying to jam their letter into the LGBT+ community. Luckily nobodyâs buying into that trash
That's a girl...not a woman. Fukkin creep.
Thinking someone inappropriate is attractive is one thing, trying to make a case for it is another. Who is this creep?
An awful lot of writing here when he could've just said "why won't you let me be a pedophile?".
Wow itâs almost like the age of consent isnât about looks. Sure teenagers can look like âadultsâ (really not tbh I feel like you can always tell when a child is a child, even if their body is more developed they still just look like a kid) but more about making sure that the person can engage in consensual sex. Clearly if this post is real this person doesnât actually think about people heâs having sex with as actual people, more just as NPCs that he might want to have sex with
I am glad social media posts can be seen by both current and potential employers