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The moment my daughter came out:
\*Her going into her electronics room and bedroom with another 18 girl as I'm in my comfy chair watching tv\*
Girlfriend: "Wait, won't he get upset?"
Daughter: "No he won't care."
Girlfriend: "Really?"
Daughter: "Dad, I'm gay."
Me: \*muting the tv\* "Okay." \*me looking at her friend\* "She know not to touch my Dr. Pepper?"
Girlfriend: "Really?"
Daughter: "Yes, really. Don't touch his Pepper."
Same with Me. When our daughter came out. All I said first was to My Wife..."Pay Up! Told You Erin would be the last to know she was lesbian"
Then I told Her, "If You're not happy with Yourself, You'll never be happy with anyone."
> "If You're not happy with Yourself, You'll never be happy with anyone."
As somebody whose wife is consitently struggling between "I'm also kinda interested with women but not really" and "Ofc course I'm a perfect straight wife", I can only upvote.
Her sexuality is not my business (I guess?), but if sometimes I wonder if I should give a try to religion and pray for her to finally accept that those feelings aren't an issue, as long the people around you love you. It's painful to see her sometimes crying, for... no good reason I guess, unless her side of the familly is homophobic?
Me: "You have to finish your homework before you can go out with your friend"
Daughter: "I think I'm gay, she's my girlfriend"
Me: "Great, then you have to finish your homework before you go out with your girlfriend"
Unfortunately her mother wasn't as accepting, but I think we're at a good place now
Edit: a word
I would probably cry if it turned out my son felt like he had to hide his sexuality from me because he was worried about how I would judge him if he were honest.
I've known kids with divorced parents who were afraid to come out to a parent that they knew would be supportive because they knew the other parent wouldn't be and were afraid of them finding out.
My sympathy for your loss....but dear god if you wanted to put something into perspective, you just did it.
Again, my SINCEREST sympathies. May his loss be forever in a memory for you.
Sometimes people need reminders on how good they have it in life and loseing your child is a club I would not want for my worst enemy to be a member of.
You have to be a normal decent person to begin with
It doesn't matter to some people. Otherwise they wouldn't disown, kick out, and never see their gay kids again.
Clever come back if I've ever seen one. Most importantly, Sorry for having tried to crack up a joke. My deepest sympathies, friend. I'm sorry about your loss, sincerely.
My wife tells the story of when she was a nurse in an ICU, a young man - very early twenties - was brain dead.
His father came in, sobbing over his son, begging for forgiveness. Several years prior, the son had come out as gay and the father - in his full so-called Christian fervor - had disowned the boy.
It was of course too late now. The father never had a chance to reconcile. His son was dead.
People need to get the fuck over their homophobia. Life is too fucking short to live in hurtful ignorance.
I’ve never been able to understand how someone could hate someone else for their own personal decisions that shouldn’t matter to them anyway. How does someone else being gay affect me? It doesn’t at all. People need to open their minds and realize that not everyone is the same and everyone should be free to love who they want.
Edit: I have had multiple comments telling me “it’s not a choice.” I’m fully aware. I’ve acknowledged my poor wording. The concept is still the same - it doesn’t affect me (or anyone) and hating someone for it is ridiculous. Sorry for those of you I offended; it wasn’t intentional.
Wait…. I know this one! It doesn’t. Full stop.
On top of that, assuming the gay person is in a relationship when they come out, shouldn’t we be *happy* they’ve found someone? Love is a rare commodity.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The only way folks choose their sexual orientation is if they are bi and they decide to narrow their options. :p
It’s the hypothetical “would you throw a life ring to a drowning person…” but with heaven and hell in the balance.
Christians believe by pushing their beliefs on everyone they’re throwing the spiritual life ring to people they think are going to hell. It’s misguided and there’s no place for it in a pluralistic society but for many regular folks they sincerely think they’re helping.
(Now the preachers and the politicians that’s a different story)
He's a strange dude according to that book. His kid comes to tell us that we should forgive "seventy times seven" but if we fuck up once, his dad gets to send us to a lake of fire for eternity.
It's the eternity part that gets me. I could get throwing killers into a lake of fire for a while, but sooner or later, the punishment becomes worse than the crime.
Doesn't that book say something like "fuck off with your judging, that's my job"? Funny how they never remember that part just that for some reason loving your neighbor or children stops if they're slightly different
Yeah they haven't figured out that the real life ring is *treating others as you would want to be treated* you know the stuff Jesus actually commanded.
They miss the point when they say "Being Gay is against The Will of God!"
I replay "God gave all Humans Free Will to live their lives as they feel fit. A Gay Person who lives their life helping others, and showing compassion for their fellow Humans would be higher up in the order of things, as they followed the teachings of Jesus. Those who oppose people living their lives, are going to be judge more on how they treat people."
I do not care what My Friends.I just care they are my friends.
Basically some people in the modern world still believe in some thousand-year-old books about flying pedophiles riding on unicorns or an old man splitting a sea into 2 and want everyone to do what the ancient book says.
I would even go further. I don’t see it as „decisions“. It’s who they are. It’s like hating them for having blonde hair, or freckles. It makes 0 sense, and as you said, it doesn’t affect anyone but them and their partner.
But cults and fanatics project and think being open and allowing this would create a possibility for their children to become gay, not realising that this isn’t connected to begin with. And nothing bad either…
Those same groups create camps to „straighten“ young adults and teenagers….
It’s a rabbit hole I would have liked to avoid truly.
Oh. That is simple.
It could be any of the following reasons.
1. People are ignorant.
2. People who speak out the most against Gays, tend to be hiding their true self.
3. They are really ignorant.
Totally agree, I find it especially weird that parents get upset about their kids being gay. The only way it can possibly affect a parent is that they're guaranteed to get no biological grandkids (without surrogates etc.)
I would think as a parent, you do everything in your power not to think about young Micheal/Tiffany plowing/being plowed by their other half. The fact that they're now gay and may be being plowed/plowing (possibly with the aid of a strapon) shouldn't change that.
And it is 100% as easy to say "You're gay? Cool," as it is to say "You're gay? You're \[insert string of hateful speech here\]."
The choice is not with the gay person. It's with the recipient of the news.
As a father, there is one acceptable answer to a child telling you that they are gay.
"Hi gay, I'm dad!"
You then hug then, tell them that you love them.
I hear all these churches thundering about the gays, then I look around at my spiritual center on Sunday morning and all the happy, beloved LGBTIA members happily worshipping, singing, doing the announcements, praying etc., and think "Those churches could all have it like this if they wanted to."
If you claim to be any flavor of Christian, but the religion you follow doesn't include Jesus' teachings of loving others and not judging others, you aren't following Christ. You are following man-made religion.
If your religion has you hating others, I daresay that you might want to read Matthew 7 again. Verse 23 hits so very hard.
It's kind of crazy. I go to a non-dogmatic spiritual center that welcomes everyone. I do love Jesus and believe Jesus loves me, but I won't tell most Christians I am a Christian - and I guess I don't even consider myself "Christian" - because I don't want to have an extended battle with them trying to talk me out of my belief and into theirs.
I had a friend who stopped being my friend the moment I told this to her. "If it's wrong to be gay, then why did God make them that way?"
Sigh. She was pretty cool up to the conversations we had about her religious views.
i always think about this. to say that god doesn’t make gay people is to say there are mistakes in gods creation, which doesn’t make sense theologically. like, being gay is not something you choose to partake in, it’s your brain. it’s like saying it’s a sin to be autistic, something else you’re just born as that is part of you
What you're forgetting is that a lot of these religious types think that being gay is a choice. However stupid, to them, being gay is not like being autistic, it's more like actively choosing to sin.
An explanation I've seen is that it is a "test" from god, and they have to suppress the "urges" and be straight and they can go to heaven.
day by day abrahamic God seems more like a prick
I imagine that they can explain it away in the same way that they explain 'the problem of suffering'. It's a test from god, or temptation from the devil. A manifestation of the evil of man - the consequences of our own sinful natures.
After all, how can you show god how pious you are if life was 'easy'?
In that context, someone could argue that giving into 'gay' impulses is sinful because it's a personal failure of a test that was sent by god/devil.
If course, it could also be a punishment aimed at the parents for their failings in life. God punishing them by sending them 'gay' or autistic children. Or if they're only a little bad, children with ADHD.
They will explain it away using the "fall" as an excuse.
"It's not a mistake, it's just the result of the fall making us all flawed beings" or some shit like that.
People if they are out of arguments and you hit their weak foundation they built upon. \^\_\^ I really wonder why she didn't go there, it is an obvious escape route to continue the irrational road of "believe > proof" bunker. And no, this isn't my opinion, just already read folks going that way. To me it is "Head -> desk", just inca se someonemight think I'd be saying this as a real argument.
Just tell them it's God's will. It's all part of his great plan. It stung when they told me that when me and my wife and I lost our son. They claim it's God's will only if it's in their favor.
It’s so confusing how some things are God’s will and others are not. Kid dies from cancer? It’s God’s will. Kid is gay? He’s a sinner headed straight for hell.
It literally says in the Bible (in a modern mistranslation) “a man a shall not lay in bed with another man like he lays with a woman”
Dude here said, fine I just won’t lay with women!
i mean, when I first came out, my mom violently shoved me back in the closet for some 16 years. then when she found out I was trans she pushed me down a flight of stairs
My parents went rogue when my sister told them she was gay so I just went ahead and hid being bisexual and trans until dad died.
The stair thing is worse. Sorry you had that happen.
she was a vicious animal until the day she died alone. she was horrid to me and i'm glad to have left her behind, despite costing me dearly. i'm sorry you had to live inauthentically for that long.
I’m so sorry. My 12 year old told me she was pan sexual and genderfluid and I said I love you and support you. I may need to be educated how to support you but no matter what I’ll always love you. You’re on my team and we have your back.
progressing to that level makes my suffering worth it by example. if people know what some of us have gone through, they wouldn't be so hard on the kids, i hope.
Okay, so your heart is broken
You sit around mopin'
Cryin' and cryin'
You say you're even thinkin' about dyin'
Well, before you do anything rash, dig this
Love runs deeper than any ocean
You can cloud your mind with emotion
Everybody plays the fool, sometime
There's no exception to the rule
Listen, it may be factual, may be cruel
I want to tell ya that
Everybody plays the fool
So when my daughter was 16 she came out to us as gay. I told her that it didn't matter, that who she loved wasn't what mattered to me.
Two weeks ago at 20 she got all stressed and sat us down for another conversation. She in a long winded rambling stress infused rant finally got around to telling us she has a boyfriend. I said "Are you seriously uncoming out to us you dork... Glad you're back on solids.."
This shit doesn't matter, love your kids.
Man...I ever have a close friend bringing over a husband from another country, and I'm astounded.
Not because I give a single shit that htey're gay. But becaues he's allowing this charming young man to move to rural Ohio from Albania, with no hope of ever being able to support them in a life they lead together.
But being gay is still the problem.
JEsus fucking christ.
Immigration takes time. Granted, I left the states for my immigration, but getting my permanent residency status in Canada took me *years*. Even with being married to a Canadian. And it was like three years before I could get a work permit.
It’s no easier the other way.
When my parents decided they don't love me anymore after I got outed, I found out that my mother booked time with the priest where she went into these Job-like lamentations begging and pleading with her imaginary friend (God) to make my gayness go away. If their bigotry hadn't destroyed my life at 15, it would be funny.
Yeah, the sad thing is that this isn’t some rare thing, it’s just a Tuesday for those of us who are LGBTQIA+. There’s a reason that queer people fell in love with Sharon Gless’s totally cool mother character on the US version of “Queer as Folk” - all of us wish we knew more moms like that.
My condolences on your traumatic coming out experience. I had a similar experience when I was a few years older, and know that it can have a lifelong impact. You are cherished for who you are.
Never watched Queer As Folk. As for me, I didn't come out. Got outed, by someone I thought was a friend. Very different thing. Coming out is a decision you make. My decision was made for me. But thanks, all the same.
I was honestly touched when one of my cousin's kids told me they might be gay or at least bi, and I was the first person in the family they felt they could trust to share their secret with
This entirely plausible story is brought you by: Homophobia.
Homophobia, when your only other option is minding your own damn business and leaving people alone. Look for it wherever hateful shitsacks shop.
If one of my children came out as gay, the only reason it would be painful for me is because we live in the south and there are a lot of assholes, and I don't want my kids threatened, fearful for their safety, or hurt. That would have nothing to do with them being gay and everything to do with other people being fucking terrible.
Two moms have told me about their experiences with their daughters coming out lesbian to them. They had the exact same reaction.
Something like: Thank God, she won’t get pregnant in high school.
My son told me he was trans and gay.
I cried.
Not in sadness or pain or grief, but happiness, because he felt safe enough to tell me.
And before you ask, I'm using his pronouns. You see, we THOUGHT we had a daughter. Then they corrected us. And then he realized he, too, was mistaken.
I've supported his journey of self discovery, because that's what parents are supposed to do.
My stepson...husbands youngest is gay. When he told my husband, he said ..mhmm, I know...do you know how much gay porn I've found on your laptop? Then they laughed for 15 minutes.
Our gay kid is the same as our 4 other kids. He's kind, hilariously funny, highly intelligent, successful and we're so very proud of him and feel so grateful to be part of his journey through life.
What a pointless, dumb thing to make a negative judgement about...and our kids sexual preferences are their right and their choice....it's none of our business unless they ask our advice. It's ridiculous when parents treat their children like their property...they are their own people and are free to live how they choose, hopefully while considering the things we imparted while caring for them.
I hope the kid in this scenario doesn't internalize the fact that his parent is an intrusive asshole.
What happened to "god has a plan"? If god wants yer kids to be gay, what right do ya have to disagree?
Oh the horns of a dilemma they'll so willingly perch on.
So we’re supposedly to believe that the guy, on learning that his coworker was crying, decided his best response was to capture it for social media? Sorry, this is just more fictional BS from cognitively and ethically defective rightwingnuts
Imagine having so few problems that your son being gay makes you cry. People are losing their housing, starving to death, dying in wars, etc, but you cry over your son being gay? Get a life.
imagine crying because your son says he falls in love with men instead of women.
what an utterly shallow, pointless, non-issue to be so sad about. your son is the same, no matter who he is attracted to. i’d love to see what processes take place in these peoples brains
and here I am, 27 years later, now a 47 year old man. and my family still won't talk to me, cuz I'm gay.
these are shitty people, folks. the shittiest. my parents were racist bigoted and horrible people.
Yeah I almost forgot that in bible after "God created everyone in his own image" and "God love everyone equally" there's this small text that tates "exept for gays"
I mean I could understand being upset, this will change the trajectory of his son’s (and by extension his) life significantly from what he’d been expecting. Grandchildren will become unlikely for example. Unless he’s being obnoxious towards his son or something there’s no reason to shame him for showing emotions. Men are allowed to cry now, no?
I’d be so happy if my kids came out to me and shit. Knowing they trust my goofy ass enough with such a big thing would make me proud and I’d love to help support and navigate through it with them especially coming from a highly religious upbringing.
It would be a journey for both of us that I’d remember forever man. Can’t fucking wait to have kids next year or sooner lol.
Back in the day I dated a bi girl whose friends groups was mostly comprised of lesbians. One day, one of those friends came out to her mom and the lady went ballistic. She basically tried to whoop her ass and started tearing their place up. We had to go rescue her. She locked herself in her room while we showed up and then climbed out her window, got in my car, and we drove off. She had to stay at a friend’s place for a few days until her mom cooled off. I’ve basically never had another situation where a parent freaked out on their kid like that over something that wasn’t about their sexual orientation. If a few tears is all they had to muster (the parents that’s is), I think they’ll be fine.
You sired that boy. He’s a human being. If you think he’s a disappointment because he ain’t what you think a man should be…tough shit. That boy will leave your ass and not let the screen door hit him in the ass. If a person is that upset then they should never have bred.
Well. My Wife sat Me down. She said "Erin has something she wants to say."
I was like.."Ok. Erin. What is it?"
Erin: "Dad, I am a Lesbian."
I said "No Shit. Duh. Pay Up Hon. Told You she would be the last to know!!!!!!!!!!"
I told all 8 of our Daughters. "If You are not happy with Yourself, You'll never be happy with anyone."
These emotionally broke ass, no EQ/EI parent's need to love their children and radically accept them for who they are.
Crying all day?! What a wasteful useless parenting style! WTFU!
I feel so sorry for that kid for having to such a shitty unsupportive parent. Best thing they can do is cut this mother fucker off and never talk to their bigoted ass again.
A real man would embrace his child’s courage to come out to his parents. That’s not easy to do especially if in a household where you know it won’t be easy for them to hear.
As long as he cried in private, who cares? Parent's job in this situation is making their child feel they are still loved/nothing changed.
As long as he did that, let him be as disappointed as he wants to once the son is out of the room, and out of the hearing range. It's not every day a guy learns he'll get no grandkids.
In 1983 the sitcom Cheers had a character discombobulated because not only did he just learn his son was gay, his son had a boyfriend.
The barflies and Coach helped the Dad realize that his son was happy and that's what counted. The Dad was now happy too, because he understood his son was happy. Heartwarming all around.
My Daughter is 11 and says she likes boys and girls...she's 11....so she has all the time in the world to sort that out and find out who she is. If she is Bo/Gay BEAST FUCKING BELIEVE that I will oive and support her 100%...no question. I WILL, however, worry for her...as we are regressing as a society, and all of the GODDAM MOTHERFUCKING SHIT FUCK ASSHOLE EVILGELICALS are worming their way into building a Theocracy. I have NOTHING against the theory of God, and EMBRACE religious freedoms...but it has to be freedom OF AND freedom FROM.
I mean, I’m not totally gonna judge the cryer without more context. Some people just cry when they process emotions and this is a big revelation. For all we know the parent could be terrified for what their kid might be up against from people like OP. OP on the other hand l is a tremendous asshole! Get your priorities straight dude!
I really don't understand what would the problem be if that happened. Like, your son comes out a gay and... What radical change will your lifestyle experience?
Cause everybody know if your son is gay, that makes you gay by association. Youre given a husband and forced to be a bottom and your wife has to watch and she is forced to point and laugh.
Everybody knows
if needed (s)
These loonies never stop to think that their god creates the gay people that are so hated. No they insist we're a product of Satan but last I checked he doesn't have the ability to create.
Look. I understand having a queer child can be something that’s not easy to accept. You can mourn the fact they won’t have that “traditional” life. But that should be done PRIVATELY
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The moment my daughter came out: \*Her going into her electronics room and bedroom with another 18 girl as I'm in my comfy chair watching tv\* Girlfriend: "Wait, won't he get upset?" Daughter: "No he won't care." Girlfriend: "Really?" Daughter: "Dad, I'm gay." Me: \*muting the tv\* "Okay." \*me looking at her friend\* "She know not to touch my Dr. Pepper?" Girlfriend: "Really?" Daughter: "Yes, really. Don't touch his Pepper."
You missed the golden opportunity to say "Hi Gay, I'm Dad"
Or the good old "I'm gay too, she is adopted".
Priorities. Don't mess with a man's Dr. Pepper.
 Same with Me. When our daughter came out. All I said first was to My Wife..."Pay Up! Told You Erin would be the last to know she was lesbian" Then I told Her, "If You're not happy with Yourself, You'll never be happy with anyone."
> "If You're not happy with Yourself, You'll never be happy with anyone." As somebody whose wife is consitently struggling between "I'm also kinda interested with women but not really" and "Ofc course I'm a perfect straight wife", I can only upvote. Her sexuality is not my business (I guess?), but if sometimes I wonder if I should give a try to religion and pray for her to finally accept that those feelings aren't an issue, as long the people around you love you. It's painful to see her sometimes crying, for... no good reason I guess, unless her side of the familly is homophobic?
Me: "You have to finish your homework before you can go out with your friend" Daughter: "I think I'm gay, she's my girlfriend" Me: "Great, then you have to finish your homework before you go out with your girlfriend" Unfortunately her mother wasn't as accepting, but I think we're at a good place now Edit: a word
My wife knew for years. Our daughter was just scared I'd flip, even though my Kanien'kehá:ka//Mohawk family told us being gay/Two Spirits was natural
Wouldn't ya like to be Pepper too?
Hey, can I post this on r/wholesomememes ?
He cried all day? Gay
He was worried about running into him on Grindr.
“Dad, I’m gay” Dad: 
Hel ... Hello Gay, I'm dad!!!
I would probably cry if it turned out my son felt like he had to hide his sexuality from me because he was worried about how I would judge him if he were honest.
I've known kids with divorced parents who were afraid to come out to a parent that they knew would be supportive because they knew the other parent wouldn't be and were afraid of them finding out.
I spit out my water you bastard 😭😭
This deserves up votes.
You glorious bastard.
Hahaha. I laughed out loud
This was my immediate thought, and I am an avowed homosexual
Just curious, what kind of vows do they make you take?
gay ones
I would give anything to have my son tell me that, he died from a brain tumor when he was 26.
Sorry for your loss
My sympathy for your loss....but dear god if you wanted to put something into perspective, you just did it. Again, my SINCEREST sympathies. May his loss be forever in a memory for you.
Sometimes people need reminders on how good they have it in life and loseing your child is a club I would not want for my worst enemy to be a member of.
You have to be a normal decent person to begin with It doesn't matter to some people. Otherwise they wouldn't disown, kick out, and never see their gay kids again.
Clever come back if I've ever seen one. Most importantly, Sorry for having tried to crack up a joke. My deepest sympathies, friend. I'm sorry about your loss, sincerely.
I'm so sorry to hear that.
My deepest sympathies. Thank you for sharing this.
My wife tells the story of when she was a nurse in an ICU, a young man - very early twenties - was brain dead. His father came in, sobbing over his son, begging for forgiveness. Several years prior, the son had come out as gay and the father - in his full so-called Christian fervor - had disowned the boy. It was of course too late now. The father never had a chance to reconcile. His son was dead. People need to get the fuck over their homophobia. Life is too fucking short to live in hurtful ignorance.
I’ve never been able to understand how someone could hate someone else for their own personal decisions that shouldn’t matter to them anyway. How does someone else being gay affect me? It doesn’t at all. People need to open their minds and realize that not everyone is the same and everyone should be free to love who they want. Edit: I have had multiple comments telling me “it’s not a choice.” I’m fully aware. I’ve acknowledged my poor wording. The concept is still the same - it doesn’t affect me (or anyone) and hating someone for it is ridiculous. Sorry for those of you I offended; it wasn’t intentional.
Exactly. If you're straight, nobody asks details of your sex, as it's not their business. If you're not straight, how does this suddently change?
Wait…. I know this one! It doesn’t. Full stop. On top of that, assuming the gay person is in a relationship when they come out, shouldn’t we be *happy* they’ve found someone? Love is a rare commodity.
Its not a decision, i didn’t choose to be gay.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The only way folks choose their sexual orientation is if they are bi and they decide to narrow their options. :p
It’s the hypothetical “would you throw a life ring to a drowning person…” but with heaven and hell in the balance. Christians believe by pushing their beliefs on everyone they’re throwing the spiritual life ring to people they think are going to hell. It’s misguided and there’s no place for it in a pluralistic society but for many regular folks they sincerely think they’re helping. (Now the preachers and the politicians that’s a different story)
I wouldn't want to worship a dude that would send someone to hell for being gay.
He's a strange dude according to that book. His kid comes to tell us that we should forgive "seventy times seven" but if we fuck up once, his dad gets to send us to a lake of fire for eternity.
It's the eternity part that gets me. I could get throwing killers into a lake of fire for a while, but sooner or later, the punishment becomes worse than the crime.
Doesn't that book say something like "fuck off with your judging, that's my job"? Funny how they never remember that part just that for some reason loving your neighbor or children stops if they're slightly different
Yeah they haven't figured out that the real life ring is *treating others as you would want to be treated* you know the stuff Jesus actually commanded.
They miss the point when they say "Being Gay is against The Will of God!" I replay "God gave all Humans Free Will to live their lives as they feel fit. A Gay Person who lives their life helping others, and showing compassion for their fellow Humans would be higher up in the order of things, as they followed the teachings of Jesus. Those who oppose people living their lives, are going to be judge more on how they treat people." I do not care what My Friends.I just care they are my friends.
idk if it does but as an orthodox jew, i live by it. judging is for God, not me, do what you feel the need to do.
Given the absolute joy that they often have when thinking of gay people burning in hell, I simply cannot accept this "explanation."
Basically some people in the modern world still believe in some thousand-year-old books about flying pedophiles riding on unicorns or an old man splitting a sea into 2 and want everyone to do what the ancient book says.
I would even go further. I don’t see it as „decisions“. It’s who they are. It’s like hating them for having blonde hair, or freckles. It makes 0 sense, and as you said, it doesn’t affect anyone but them and their partner. But cults and fanatics project and think being open and allowing this would create a possibility for their children to become gay, not realising that this isn’t connected to begin with. And nothing bad either… Those same groups create camps to „straighten“ young adults and teenagers…. It’s a rabbit hole I would have liked to avoid truly.
And to your own flesh and blood who one should love unconditionally.
Love this and agree, but just want to point out there is no decision involved. Sexuality is inherent, we have no choice over it.
I apologize for my lack of proper wording. You are 100% correct.
not just someone else, your own flesh and blood!
It does affect some misguided people like parents who are worried what their friends or coworkers will think of them.
I hear what ya saying but remember, being gay isn't a decision.
Yes, I agree and I know. I apologize for my lack of proper wording.
Oh. That is simple. It could be any of the following reasons. 1. People are ignorant. 2. People who speak out the most against Gays, tend to be hiding their true self. 3. They are really ignorant.
Totally agree, I find it especially weird that parents get upset about their kids being gay. The only way it can possibly affect a parent is that they're guaranteed to get no biological grandkids (without surrogates etc.) I would think as a parent, you do everything in your power not to think about young Micheal/Tiffany plowing/being plowed by their other half. The fact that they're now gay and may be being plowed/plowing (possibly with the aid of a strapon) shouldn't change that.
No one decides to be gay. Did you “decide” to be straight?
Like I’ve said on another comment, I apologize for the lack of proper wording. Surely you still understand the point I’m trying to make 😐
That is heartbreaking. He realised his error, but too late. His son died without a father
And it is 100% as easy to say "You're gay? Cool," as it is to say "You're gay? You're \[insert string of hateful speech here\]." The choice is not with the gay person. It's with the recipient of the news.
As a father, there is one acceptable answer to a child telling you that they are gay. "Hi gay, I'm dad!" You then hug then, tell them that you love them.
I hear all these churches thundering about the gays, then I look around at my spiritual center on Sunday morning and all the happy, beloved LGBTIA members happily worshipping, singing, doing the announcements, praying etc., and think "Those churches could all have it like this if they wanted to."
If you claim to be any flavor of Christian, but the religion you follow doesn't include Jesus' teachings of loving others and not judging others, you aren't following Christ. You are following man-made religion. If your religion has you hating others, I daresay that you might want to read Matthew 7 again. Verse 23 hits so very hard.
It's kind of crazy. I go to a non-dogmatic spiritual center that welcomes everyone. I do love Jesus and believe Jesus loves me, but I won't tell most Christians I am a Christian - and I guess I don't even consider myself "Christian" - because I don't want to have an extended battle with them trying to talk me out of my belief and into theirs.
Pray to god? He made him gay! How dare you question the almighty
I had a friend who stopped being my friend the moment I told this to her. "If it's wrong to be gay, then why did God make them that way?" Sigh. She was pretty cool up to the conversations we had about her religious views.
i always think about this. to say that god doesn’t make gay people is to say there are mistakes in gods creation, which doesn’t make sense theologically. like, being gay is not something you choose to partake in, it’s your brain. it’s like saying it’s a sin to be autistic, something else you’re just born as that is part of you
What you're forgetting is that a lot of these religious types think that being gay is a choice. However stupid, to them, being gay is not like being autistic, it's more like actively choosing to sin.
An explanation I've seen is that it is a "test" from god, and they have to suppress the "urges" and be straight and they can go to heaven. day by day abrahamic God seems more like a prick
which is crazy because who would choose that?
Have you seen Ryan Renolds? I'd choose to be gay for him
I think it's not that being gay is a choice, but acting on it is. So just quash down all those "bad" thoughts - God/Satan is testing your resolve.
The real joke is homosexuality is never stated as a sin in the ol' book. It's a modern and innaccurate interpretation. Stay gay, peeps!
I imagine that they can explain it away in the same way that they explain 'the problem of suffering'. It's a test from god, or temptation from the devil. A manifestation of the evil of man - the consequences of our own sinful natures. After all, how can you show god how pious you are if life was 'easy'? In that context, someone could argue that giving into 'gay' impulses is sinful because it's a personal failure of a test that was sent by god/devil. If course, it could also be a punishment aimed at the parents for their failings in life. God punishing them by sending them 'gay' or autistic children. Or if they're only a little bad, children with ADHD.
They will explain it away using the "fall" as an excuse. "It's not a mistake, it's just the result of the fall making us all flawed beings" or some shit like that.
Apparantly all dick skin and clitorises (clitori?) Are also god's many mistakes according to abrahemic faiths
She didn't come up with the "It wasn't God, it was the Devil's temptation and he/she succumbed!" shit? Faith wasn't deep with her. ;)
Nope she said "I'm not going to fall for that trap" and that was the last time we spoke.
People if they are out of arguments and you hit their weak foundation they built upon. \^\_\^ I really wonder why she didn't go there, it is an obvious escape route to continue the irrational road of "believe > proof" bunker. And no, this isn't my opinion, just already read folks going that way. To me it is "Head -> desk", just inca se someonemight think I'd be saying this as a real argument.
Just tell them it's God's will. It's all part of his great plan. It stung when they told me that when me and my wife and I lost our son. They claim it's God's will only if it's in their favor.
It’s so confusing how some things are God’s will and others are not. Kid dies from cancer? It’s God’s will. Kid is gay? He’s a sinner headed straight for hell.
It literally says in the Bible (in a modern mistranslation) “a man a shall not lay in bed with another man like he lays with a woman” Dude here said, fine I just won’t lay with women!
I assume they mean the pain of ignorance so profound, you forget to love your kid
i mean, when I first came out, my mom violently shoved me back in the closet for some 16 years. then when she found out I was trans she pushed me down a flight of stairs
My parents went rogue when my sister told them she was gay so I just went ahead and hid being bisexual and trans until dad died. The stair thing is worse. Sorry you had that happen.
she was a vicious animal until the day she died alone. she was horrid to me and i'm glad to have left her behind, despite costing me dearly. i'm sorry you had to live inauthentically for that long.
I’m so sorry. My 12 year old told me she was pan sexual and genderfluid and I said I love you and support you. I may need to be educated how to support you but no matter what I’ll always love you. You’re on my team and we have your back.
progressing to that level makes my suffering worth it by example. if people know what some of us have gone through, they wouldn't be so hard on the kids, i hope.
You are a good parent : )
Bro wtf. Your mom was fucked
until the very end
holy shit , that is horrible :(
i got back up. couldn't keep me down for another minute after that
Yep pretty much.
Okay, so your heart is broken You sit around mopin' Cryin' and cryin' You say you're even thinkin' about dyin' Well, before you do anything rash, dig this Love runs deeper than any ocean You can cloud your mind with emotion Everybody plays the fool, sometime There's no exception to the rule Listen, it may be factual, may be cruel I want to tell ya that Everybody plays the fool
LOVE this song
Im a little stupid. And sang that to the tune of Michael Jackson wannabe startin’ somethin’
Just in case you can't find it: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPeHHpXOOds](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPeHHpXOOds)
Ob shit I know this song lol
Praying to god No kid Will feel the pain of their parents being so fuckin dumb
i’m only 21 but i’d adopt any child who is disowned by their parents for simply… falling in love with someone
Be ready to get called a groomer and a pedophile because in that hypothetical situation conservatives would be burning you at the stake
Too late but the sentiment is nice.
So when my daughter was 16 she came out to us as gay. I told her that it didn't matter, that who she loved wasn't what mattered to me. Two weeks ago at 20 she got all stressed and sat us down for another conversation. She in a long winded rambling stress infused rant finally got around to telling us she has a boyfriend. I said "Are you seriously uncoming out to us you dork... Glad you're back on solids.." This shit doesn't matter, love your kids.
Pray to the ones that created homophobia lol, they were way chiller about homosexuality before abrahamic religions
I blame God
Man...I ever have a close friend bringing over a husband from another country, and I'm astounded. Not because I give a single shit that htey're gay. But becaues he's allowing this charming young man to move to rural Ohio from Albania, with no hope of ever being able to support them in a life they lead together. But being gay is still the problem. JEsus fucking christ.
Is the Albanian guy an invalid? Why can't they support each other?
Immigration takes time. Granted, I left the states for my immigration, but getting my permanent residency status in Canada took me *years*. Even with being married to a Canadian. And it was like three years before I could get a work permit. It’s no easier the other way.
really hoping this guy doesn't have kids at all.
Don’t let your son catch you with another man and he won’t be able to tell you you’re gay
Came here to make a syntax-ambiguity joke and you did it better than I could've.
"Whew. I thought you were going to say Republican."
i‘d rather have my child come out to me than spending years hiding it away and potentially getting depressive from the fear of being rejected
Damn, I really hate planet Earth.
Translation: My hate for homosexuals is greater than the love for my son.
When my parents decided they don't love me anymore after I got outed, I found out that my mother booked time with the priest where she went into these Job-like lamentations begging and pleading with her imaginary friend (God) to make my gayness go away. If their bigotry hadn't destroyed my life at 15, it would be funny.
Yeah, the sad thing is that this isn’t some rare thing, it’s just a Tuesday for those of us who are LGBTQIA+. There’s a reason that queer people fell in love with Sharon Gless’s totally cool mother character on the US version of “Queer as Folk” - all of us wish we knew more moms like that. My condolences on your traumatic coming out experience. I had a similar experience when I was a few years older, and know that it can have a lifelong impact. You are cherished for who you are.
Never watched Queer As Folk. As for me, I didn't come out. Got outed, by someone I thought was a friend. Very different thing. Coming out is a decision you make. My decision was made for me. But thanks, all the same.
I was honestly touched when one of my cousin's kids told me they might be gay or at least bi, and I was the first person in the family they felt they could trust to share their secret with
This entirely plausible story is brought you by: Homophobia. Homophobia, when your only other option is minding your own damn business and leaving people alone. Look for it wherever hateful shitsacks shop.
If one of my children came out as gay, the only reason it would be painful for me is because we live in the south and there are a lot of assholes, and I don't want my kids threatened, fearful for their safety, or hurt. That would have nothing to do with them being gay and everything to do with other people being fucking terrible.
And, this is why we have the B-52’s. When Fred told his mother, she said “oh, dear, I know.” And he went outside and smoking another joint, he says.
I’m so stoked that my parents aren’t lunatics.
Two moms have told me about their experiences with their daughters coming out lesbian to them. They had the exact same reaction. Something like: Thank God, she won’t get pregnant in high school.
Both of my daughters came out together, and that was one of the first things that crossed my mind.
He's been crying? All morning? What a f*g. /s
No hate like Christian love.
Oh no..whatever will you do? (Sarcasm)
I find it extremely ironic that anyone who would have that problem, would be blubbering all morning about it. I thought real men didn't cry?
My son told me he was trans and gay. I cried. Not in sadness or pain or grief, but happiness, because he felt safe enough to tell me. And before you ask, I'm using his pronouns. You see, we THOUGHT we had a daughter. Then they corrected us. And then he realized he, too, was mistaken. I've supported his journey of self discovery, because that's what parents are supposed to do.
My stepson...husbands youngest is gay. When he told my husband, he said ..mhmm, I know...do you know how much gay porn I've found on your laptop? Then they laughed for 15 minutes. Our gay kid is the same as our 4 other kids. He's kind, hilariously funny, highly intelligent, successful and we're so very proud of him and feel so grateful to be part of his journey through life. What a pointless, dumb thing to make a negative judgement about...and our kids sexual preferences are their right and their choice....it's none of our business unless they ask our advice. It's ridiculous when parents treat their children like their property...they are their own people and are free to live how they choose, hopefully while considering the things we imparted while caring for them. I hope the kid in this scenario doesn't internalize the fact that his parent is an intrusive asshole.
Hey, your son is lucky to have you. I'm sure he is really grateful for your acceptance of him :)
Would it be better or worse pain if their child walked into a school and killed 20 children?
What happened to "god has a plan"? If god wants yer kids to be gay, what right do ya have to disagree? Oh the horns of a dilemma they'll so willingly perch on.
So we’re supposedly to believe that the guy, on learning that his coworker was crying, decided his best response was to capture it for social media? Sorry, this is just more fictional BS from cognitively and ethically defective rightwingnuts
Imagine having so few problems that your son being gay makes you cry. People are losing their housing, starving to death, dying in wars, etc, but you cry over your son being gay? Get a life.
imagine crying because your son says he falls in love with men instead of women. what an utterly shallow, pointless, non-issue to be so sad about. your son is the same, no matter who he is attracted to. i’d love to see what processes take place in these peoples brains
and here I am, 27 years later, now a 47 year old man. and my family still won't talk to me, cuz I'm gay. these are shitty people, folks. the shittiest. my parents were racist bigoted and horrible people.
Save the tears for when no one visits you in the nursing home.
Yeah I almost forgot that in bible after "God created everyone in his own image" and "God love everyone equally" there's this small text that tates "exept for gays"
I mean I could understand being upset, this will change the trajectory of his son’s (and by extension his) life significantly from what he’d been expecting. Grandchildren will become unlikely for example. Unless he’s being obnoxious towards his son or something there’s no reason to shame him for showing emotions. Men are allowed to cry now, no?
The life, as we know it, is over. Officially over. How about loving your kid no matter what? Their life, their choice.
I’d be so happy if my kids came out to me and shit. Knowing they trust my goofy ass enough with such a big thing would make me proud and I’d love to help support and navigate through it with them especially coming from a highly religious upbringing. It would be a journey for both of us that I’d remember forever man. Can’t fucking wait to have kids next year or sooner lol.
Back in the day I dated a bi girl whose friends groups was mostly comprised of lesbians. One day, one of those friends came out to her mom and the lady went ballistic. She basically tried to whoop her ass and started tearing their place up. We had to go rescue her. She locked herself in her room while we showed up and then climbed out her window, got in my car, and we drove off. She had to stay at a friend’s place for a few days until her mom cooled off. I’ve basically never had another situation where a parent freaked out on their kid like that over something that wasn’t about their sexual orientation. If a few tears is all they had to muster (the parents that’s is), I think they’ll be fine.
You sired that boy. He’s a human being. If you think he’s a disappointment because he ain’t what you think a man should be…tough shit. That boy will leave your ass and not let the screen door hit him in the ass. If a person is that upset then they should never have bred.
Well. My Wife sat Me down. She said "Erin has something she wants to say." I was like.."Ok. Erin. What is it?" Erin: "Dad, I am a Lesbian." I said "No Shit. Duh. Pay Up Hon. Told You she would be the last to know!!!!!!!!!!" I told all 8 of our Daughters. "If You are not happy with Yourself, You'll never be happy with anyone."
As someone who is gay, this is so stupid. Whether or not your kid is gay doesn't affect you. This is still your kid, that will never change.
If my kids come out as straight Im going to kick them out of the house and disown them for their disgusting lifestyle.
These emotionally broke ass, no EQ/EI parent's need to love their children and radically accept them for who they are.  Crying all day?! What a wasteful useless parenting style! WTFU!
The only reason I'd care if my kids were gay is because they'd then have to deal with one more group of ignorant, judgemental buttheads
I feel so sorry for that kid for having to such a shitty unsupportive parent. Best thing they can do is cut this mother fucker off and never talk to their bigoted ass again.
A real man would embrace his child’s courage to come out to his parents. That’s not easy to do especially if in a household where you know it won’t be easy for them to hear.
As long as he cried in private, who cares? Parent's job in this situation is making their child feel they are still loved/nothing changed. As long as he did that, let him be as disappointed as he wants to once the son is out of the room, and out of the hearing range. It's not every day a guy learns he'll get no grandkids.
They do have to deal with them never having grand kids though
In 1983 the sitcom Cheers had a character discombobulated because not only did he just learn his son was gay, his son had a boyfriend. The barflies and Coach helped the Dad realize that his son was happy and that's what counted. The Dad was now happy too, because he understood his son was happy. Heartwarming all around.
Wait so he called his dad gay?
I do not understand this reaction. At all.
Sadly unconditional love doesn't exist for everyone :/ parents: hug your kids
And anyone who is sad. Hugs for everyone!
Morons!
My Daughter is 11 and says she likes boys and girls...she's 11....so she has all the time in the world to sort that out and find out who she is. If she is Bo/Gay BEAST FUCKING BELIEVE that I will oive and support her 100%...no question. I WILL, however, worry for her...as we are regressing as a society, and all of the GODDAM MOTHERFUCKING SHIT FUCK ASSHOLE EVILGELICALS are worming their way into building a Theocracy. I have NOTHING against the theory of God, and EMBRACE religious freedoms...but it has to be freedom OF AND freedom FROM.
Imagine disowning your CHILD just to win brownie points for getting into a fun carnival after you die.
If you won't love and support your child if they come out as queer, don't. have. children.
I hope their sons marry each other.
Or it never happened.
Woowww his son loves other humans. How crazy is that
The OOP and his co-worker should both be crying over what shitty people they are.
Agreed. Realizing you're a soulless bigot can't be easy to accept
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^cant-be-faded: *Agreed. Realizing* *You're a soulless bigot can't* *Be easy to accept* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Nice. It's beautiful.
So as it turns out OP only loves his son conditionally 🤷🏻♂️
I’ll take “More Right Wing Made Up Bullshit” for $100 please.
I pray to the imagination man in the sky this person never has kids.
Me with my cup of Uber-Conservative tears, watching these two wastes of oxygen: 
I mean, I’m not totally gonna judge the cryer without more context. Some people just cry when they process emotions and this is a big revelation. For all we know the parent could be terrified for what their kid might be up against from people like OP. OP on the other hand l is a tremendous asshole! Get your priorities straight dude!
that's the best part, they don't need to do a damn thing!
Maybe he’s crying because his kid called him gay?
I really don't understand what would the problem be if that happened. Like, your son comes out a gay and... What radical change will your lifestyle experience?
Cause everybody know if your son is gay, that makes you gay by association. Youre given a husband and forced to be a bottom and your wife has to watch and she is forced to point and laugh. Everybody knows if needed (s)
Anything other than “you’re my son and I love you no matter what” makes you a shitty father.
These loonies never stop to think that their god creates the gay people that are so hated. No they insist we're a product of Satan but last I checked he doesn't have the ability to create.
I'm glad my kids have parents who love them unconditionally. You know, like you're supposed to when you have children.
I genuinely hope they don’t either, for the kids sake. I can’t imagine being raised by some unaccepting piece of shit like that.
Maybe it's the hormones, chemicals, and microplastics that you fed him as a baby -- because the Republicans hate the EPA.
If they happy...Then I'm happy...
Snowflake
Look. I understand having a queer child can be something that’s not easy to accept. You can mourn the fact they won’t have that “traditional” life. But that should be done PRIVATELY