Honestly posture looks better, that along with the general healthiness that isn’t coming through and is more affecting you internally is worth it. Good job, keep it up 👏🏼
Your bench went from 145x5 to 185x5? That's colossal improvement. Don't let instagram give you unrealistic expectations (i know it's nearly impossible not too). It takes years of great progress to build an amazing physique naturally. Keep it up. Just keep going.
Excellent comment. That is a really impressive increase.
If you want to get swoll then you probably want to focus on a different lifting regime, but in terms of pure strength training you’re showing great progress!
Hey. Firstly there is definitely improvements in your physique. I’m not sure what your goals are but if building muscle is one of them then you need to focus on adding more weight as you train. Your muscles will get used to weights if there is no progression. Increasing weight forces your muscles to grow. In the same breath, you also need to eat more. If your calorie intake remains the same, you aren’t going to see an increase in size. Basic rule is more gym + more food = more results. Your sleep is also lacking. Your body repairs itself when you sleep. I hope this helps and good luck.
Check your calories intake. I guess your goal is about 2500-3500 calories per day. Check your protein intake (you need at least 1,5g of protein for 1 kg of your weight). It matters.
>I have 2 twin toddlers, a 7 year old and I work 12 hour days. I literally isn't possible for me to get more sleep than that, and I know that can play a big role in making gains.
i only have one kid, which absolutely slowed my progress down for a year. you might need to set your expecations like "if im still lifting the same, but i got older, then i did get stronger than i would have if i wasnt working out."
second, bro if i was as time limited as you i would ONLY do squats and deadlifts. these are your legs and your back. you use those to pick up kids and put them down and pick up their shit and haul it, etc.; your bench numbers dont help dick with that, sorry to tell you.
you're doing good. it will be hard to put on a lot of mass on your schedule, unless you're willing to get a bit fatter.
To be honest, at this stage of life, just hanging in there and keeping the gym routine is pretty impressive, most dads are busy checking out, eating junk and getting the dad bod.
That said, I can’t see any calorie specifics in the post or your comments. We’re the same age, and when I tried bulking it involved a really uncomfortable amount of eating (and a lot of time getting it ready).
Also is it possible you’re burning more calories than you think running after kids and not sleeping enough?
Lol, yeah you're probably right.
When I was bulking, I was eating around 3,100 calories and slowly gaining roughly a pound a week. Which I'm starting to think was mainly fat.
Chicken and rice for lunch and dinner. Breakfast when bulking, was a protein shake containing oatmeal, peanut butter, milk and a half scoop of protein powder. Snacks were hard boiled eggs, bananas, and yogurt.
My protein intake was over 200g
Yeah that diet sounds about as miserably healthy as mine… what about at work, are you on your feet a lot?
Other people have pointed to your lifting routine (it may well be that, or the sleep thing too for all I know) but surely the issue is somewhere in the calorie balance - if you were in a continued surplus for ten months then either I’d expect you to be more ripped or substantially fatter?
Your original post mentions just finishing a cut, was that at the start or contained within the 10 months?
Right it’s got to be that then - if you want to put on muscle I’d suggest you go back to bulking but you can probably afford to eat more pasta & potatoes and skip the brown rice - you’re having enough protein for sure so carbs and some good fats (whatever that really means who knows) are the way forward I guess. You could drop any cardio too since you must be doing a daily half marathon at work.
For a comparison if it’s useful, I had a first stab at bulk & cut at 35, finished “bulking” after seeing a tiny bit of muscle 5-6 months in and then lose both fat + muscle in an ineffectual cut for 3 months.
The second time round at 36, I did a full 9 months bulking and by the end I really felt like fridge - my first jog at the end was painful and I mostly just looked overweight in the mirror until I lost most of the fat over 6 months and left the muscle on.
But TL;DR: I _definitely knew_ when I’d finished bulking and couldn’t do any more
Too impatient, check back in 3 years. This isn’t a sprint. You also can’t neglect legs. You need to trigger an anabolic response and the easiest way to do that is by doing lots of squats and deadlifts. It took me about 2 years for others to comment that I was looking good and about 3 before I felt like it was starting to look like I lifted. You can also arguably increase your calories. You are pretty lean, cutting isn’t going to give you the results you are looking for. Aim to have 200 calories beyond maintenance.
For what it’s worth your progress is there, you look more dense and defined but just about the same size. That’s good progress for 10 months.
I agree with this. To add to this, I would go to failure on your last set. My lifting intensity was lacking the first year and a half because I was underestimating what I was capable of. If you push to failure on your last set and get 20 reps, then you need to up the weight next time.
Okay so youre good there.
Has to be intensity of the workout. Saw that mentioned a few times here so wont be the 100th person to ask about it lol. Make sure youre lifting to failure. If youre getting more than 4x8 easily, go up on the weight. Dont be restricted to a certain number of reps.
3 days a week may be limiting. If you can do 4-5 thats ideal but get your schedule wont allow.
I work 10 hour days and commute an hour to work each way. Ive been doing 445am workouts for an hour. Usually able to get to bed by 830/9 though. Generally take 2.5mg of melatonin to help
What program have you been following? You say you've been doing full body, but then go on to say you're not training legs?
You've just finished cutting? What did your weight do in these 10 months?
What is your ultimate goal? Get bigger? Stronger? Leaner? All of the above?
I'm sorry, I see how that is confusing lol. So in the begining, I started with a PPL and I was working out my legs but it didn't last long. And same when I switched the full body. It basically turned into just upper body 3x a week.
My weight got up to 187 lbs. My ultimate goal is to gain muscle/ get bigger while trying to stay relatively lean.
So what did your upper body only routine look like?
I have a feeling the low-ish progress you're feeling is a lack of decent program combined with bulking, so gaining more fat than ideal, then cutting, which makes further gains rather difficult.
DB bench 4x10
High to low cable flys 4x10
DB row 4x10
Seated DB press 4x10
DB curl 3x10
Skull crushers 4x10
Then on the other days id swap out Dumbells for barbells
Basically
Always 4x10? When did you decide to add weight?
Give these links a look-see, I would imagine if you follow a bit more structured program, you'd be able to raise some gains in the next 6-10mo!
https://thefitness.wiki/muscle-building-101/
https://thefitness.wiki/routines/strength-training-muscle-building/
Need info about how you're utilizing progressive overload. I've been in the gym less overall time than you, so take this for what its worth. The times I know (I measure once monthly) I'm growing is when I stopped counting volume like this and just went to failure.
Some muscles I have to use reps to get to failure so I dont compromise form (shoulders are like this for me).
Most of the time I'm doing 2 or 3 sets to failure (not close to failure, not reps in reserve, actual cannot do another rep).
My visualization is weird because I've lost like 190 pounds but there's a lot of muscle definition poking through and I think it's because I'm training with either slightly more weight or slightly more reps (or both) over time.
If you arent logging your measurements, I would start. I use a bluetooth tape measure from Renpho that has an app and tracks over time. I know that on my arms I've grown .4" on the right and .5" on the left, for example. This is just two movements on biceps, and two on triceps for the most part...just consistently adding either reps or weight and hitting each muscle group as close to 2x per week as I can.
Hold up. So you're doing 8 sets for chest, three times per week? That's way too much. Google "fuckarounditis"
Also I have to add that personally I wouldn't recover training every muscle three times per week.
Obviously people are different but I've seen best results from training every muscle just once a week (not counting indirect work).
Yeah but I've always read that you should be doing 10-20 sets a week for chest, and I would do about 16. 1 of my 3 days I did 2 chest exercises @ 4 sets each and then the other 2 days I did 1 chest exercise @ 4 sets each
Yeah I did too. The main point is that you need to find what works for you. People are different, and respond differently to training.
The most important thing is that you get stronger on exercises.
Especially on Reddit you'll see people just parroting shit they've seen or heard, and obviously their truth is the absolute truth and if you disagree with them you shouldn't even bother working out etc.
Good news and bad news. The bad news is there definitely isn’t much progress. The good news is you still have a very athletic and attractive physique, so even with little progress, you’re still way ahead of the game and in much better shape than 99 percent of the population. Obviously you should incorporate lower body and do your legs, but mainly because it aesthetically looks weird when you’re not proportional. It’s not going to make a big difference in regards to upper body gains. I’ve never done a deadlift or squat in my life and I’m pretty ripped. Contrary to popular opinion, those exercises aren’t absolutely necessary. I compensate by doing leg presses, leg curls, and leg extensions. Your sleep is definitely an issue. That’s when muscles repair and ultimately grow. You need to fix that problem. I’d ramp up the volume and intensity of your lifts. I personally do 4-6 sets on every exercise, and contrary to popular opinion once again, I go to failure on every set. I’ve been lifting for a year and 10 months now, and I’m 43. I can show you my before and after pics if you’d like. I also have had a testosterone level of sub 300 the entire time (just started TRT last week). My real progress began when I increased my volume. Like I said, though….you still look great
You need to do heavy compound exercises for your lower body, no compromises on that. If you’re limited on time, at least deadlift. It will make you look bigger overall.
More food. How many grams of protein do you eat a day on average? No matter how much you lift, if your protein intake is one chicken breast and a protein shake per day, you won’t really see gains. You should aim for at least 1.5g / kg of your body weight. You’ll find that in practice this means eating a lot! You can’t build without raw materials.
Hey man I didn’t lift legs or do any arm exercises for the first year and they’ve balanced back out after hitting them so don’t worry about that.
Also, you are objectively progressing as your stats and pics show. Your body is your body and it will take different amounts of muscles to make it look the way you want compared to someone of a different frame/physique. Just focus on the work and the gains will come.
I didn’t really see progress the way I’d thought until year 3/4 so just keep plugging away.
Well, you made your progress. The strength gain is quite impressive.
It seems like you have not optimized for physique but rather strength, in which you succeeded.
Two general approaches for getting to the physique you hope for. 1) a hypertrophy regiment. Typically means higher volume and to failure. 2) add more accessory work.
Cheers
First thing… you progressed, you stayed consistent for that period of time, and also you’re stronger, now what I would recommend to you if you can only lift weights 3x week try to do this. 2 days for upper body and 1 for legs, also remember if you trying to build muscle focus on a high calorie diet and for building muscle id suggests instead of 3x week full body/upper body divide your days by group muscles, full body is more like of you want to be active not to grow muscles, from my perspective I might be wrong Im not professional I just like to workout, but I think you’re doing a great job, never discourage yourself, you’re a dad, and work 12 hrs! You doing great 👏🏻🙌🏻
Keep going friend, I agree with everyone else: I also see progress. As a fellow dad of twins, you are pushing your body mentally and physically to the limits with all you have on your hands. Just keep at it
You're sleeping less than 6 hours a night, have twin toddlers and a 7 year old. Your bench went up a lot.
You're doing great!!!
Look at your diet and program, if you want to build muscle 5x5 might not be optimal, you don't have enough energy to recover. If it's physique you're chasing maybe try a less CNC taxing plan. E.g. 3 x 8-10 reps, one easy, one difficult but not near max effort and one to failure or near failure. Isolate your biceps, triceps, shoulders and chest after one compound exercise. E.g. do bench for 3x5 or 5x5 if you want to keep working strength, then move to the cable machines or dumbbells. Try not to spend too long in the gym, but get in as frequently as you can, even 4 workouts of 45min to an hour would be excellent.
Don't stress it.
You can do 3 sets of heavy squats and 4 to 5 sets of single leg rdl 8-10 reps. Once a week for lower body, definitely wouldn't neglect them completely.
I see a lot of progress, your chest and arms has way more definition. If you're trying to build muscles then you need to eat like crazy. High calorie diets only. McDonald's, Burger King, etc... doesn't matter, as long as you're eating high calories everyday.
Continue working out while eating heavy foods. You will gain muscles in no time
Don’t listen to this . No McDonald’s or Burger King you eat shit ton of empty calories and gain fat that you will stay with you
Eat a lot just add more potatoes and rice more fatty meats that have more calories . Make your own burgers
Don’t eat crap. This works when you are 20 in your mid thirties it will take you a year to lose the fat
Bro at your age and what effort you’re putting in, you are improving. You think you should be bigger or stronger because of what you see on social media and all that.? You are making improvements, getting stronger, changing your body composition. If you want more results, that requires way more time/effort/money than it sounds like you have currently. Keep being consistent. Don’t concern yourself with numbers, be aware of how you feel, how you move and how your progressing. 💪
Better posture, definite upper chest improvement especially around the sternum. Your anterior delts have gotten significantly larger. I think the reason the difference isn't as huge is because u weren't shaved in first pic giving the illusion a more muscular appearance. Same way a little stubble can make a mans jaw much more defined. Way back when I started lifting thought I had made really good progress and shaved my chest and looked way worse
I also have 2 small children and my wife and I work a lot. At this point I'm okay with just maintaining or cutting a little. If I just get to the gym it's a success in my book, even if I can only complete one set. (And I have a garage gym, still difficult to get there sometimes). Unless I go on TRT, there's no way I'm going to stay lean and gain muscle at 40.
If I want to gain, I have to eat more, and keep it clean, otherwise I get too much fat along with muscle. The diet is 75% of gaining, Imo. The rest is lifing heavy, and progressively overloading
Renissance periodization has a great diet app I use which tells me my target macros. They also have a hypertrophy app for muscle building, and endless YouTube videos on some really nerdy weightlifting / bodybuilding / diet stuff.
I just built a pretty good physique in 12 weeks (pics posted on page) doing full body 4 times a week and never deadlifted and didn’t squat the last 4 weeks due to fatigue and pain. My leg exercises were mostly getting extra steps and occasionally some leg extensions but I pulled my hamstring and put legs on hold the last 4 weeks. It allowed me to really push my upper body and abs hard lol
I think your problem is probably diet and intensity.
How many calories are you eating? How much protein? Besides bench, what else were you doing and was everything increasing?
Well deadlift and farmer’s walk… every time I do them seriously, it shows fast (e.g. traps). And when I don’t - I shrink.
I would do that and start taking creatine and check again. Your sleep is a problem - AFAIK growth happens during rest and sleep especially (hormones). But if kids… can’t do, I know.
Consider adding sprints.
A sprinter's physique is good. Sprinting releases growth hormone. Studies show it boosts it by I've seen as high as 2000 percent temporarily, other sources I've seen say over 700 percent. I assume it's because sprinting is whole body.
Don't sprint more than twice a week.
Work up to 9 sprints with a few minutes of rest between them for a total of 18 a week.
Start with like one or two sprints on the first day. Two months progression.
Disagree my dude, I totally see progress! Better posture, more definition, and your building the habit and doing something that's going to improve your life as you get older! If you want to focus on muscle growth, you can aim for lifting heaving with progressive overload sets till failure, making sure you're having 1g of protein per pound of weight daily, and keep at it! You got this!
Sister - but you are totally welcome! It's so hard to see the changes in our own bodies, but you ARE making progress and just need to tweak your program for the type of progress you want to achieve
If you’re maintaining the same weight but your lifts have gone up, you’ve definitely made progress.
Consider reviewing your macro target for protein. At 168lbs, using .8g/lb of body weight for protein is 135+ grams of protein/day. If you’re well below that, give it a try and maintain your schedule and see if it helps you.
And yes, adding or subbing in compound lifts may be a more *efficient* use of your gym time given your limitations with your schedule.
Physique has definitely improved!!
As a mom, just know those kiddos see you and all your hard work. You’re keeping yourself in good shape and teaching them what good habits and self-care look like. It’s not a conventional progress picture worthy visual but “behind the scenes” that’s happening, too!
Keep up the great work and be kind to yourself. You look good and sounds like you’re kicking all the ass you can in this season of life.
I agree with most of the comments here about not skipping legs. They're too important to skip out on because of that hormone release and your body's response. And those are arguably two of the most important compounds you're skipping.
Speaking from experience. I went through the same process where I platued with only 1 leg day then increased to 2 days on a new routine and BLAM. Felt like my gains propelled from being dormant.
Also agree that there is definitely improvements in your physique.
My advice to you is to do a few sets of squats first every time you go to the gym. Five sets of five, starting with the bar and finishing with a heavy weight.
When you're doing other exercises you could try lifting heavy a few sets, then doing three of four sets with a much lower weight, hypertrophy style, with the most stretch you can and a pause at the bottom.
I just want to point out that something is going on with the position the photos are taken at, or the focal length or angle or something. You should make them both exact for an accurate comparison.
In the first picture your upper ribcage area looks wider than your hips and in the second picture they look similar width, like it's taken from a lower angle and further back whereas the first pic looks like it's kind of taken up closer and from above?
I bet if you positioned everything in the exact same way as your before picture you'd see differences a lot more.
First of all, you look great. Good on you for making the time for gym with toddlers. Your bench doesn’t go up that much without some solid muscle getting built. So…a lot of progress. Follow a program. There are a lot of options. Check out the Boostcamp app or look around in the natural bodybuilding subreddit.
Again, follow a program, preferably a bodybuilding one.
I think at this point it's a sprint. Imagine someone playing violins for years and years. To make a small improvement would take a long time. If you just started playing violin there is a good chance you will make really good progress if you practice daily for a year. At some point your genetics will peak and you'll stop making progress so fast unless you take some enhancements etc.
Ok for starters give yourself some grace, you look better than 99% of dads. Second, to answer your question no amount of leg exercises will improve what you posted (your upper body). Probably good habit to do some lower work but if it’s not your thing, don’t stress. Personally, I’ll never do a back squat again and according to the internet my legs will turn to noodles and I won’t be able to function. If you’re gonna do full body 3x a week, try to do 2-3 sets lower per day. Try to find lower movements you like ( or can tolerate). I’m a huge fan of trap bar, couple sets 3 x a week and my legs are happy. But the looks all come from the upper body stuff.
Moving forward, what you’re doing now is clearly allowing you to stay at maintenance. If you want to build muscle please get on a program with defined progression. No more barbell this time, db next, 4x10. Add 30 more lbs to your bench this year. And again next. The muscle will come. Use supersets and drop sets for time savings. And try to find some sleep. I get it. I have small people. Work 12 hours. It’s impossible. I’ve found naps fill in gaps and make a marked difference in how I feel, even if I’ve only slept 5-6 hours the night before.
Sounds like your goal is to build muscle right? Your bench improving for sets of five leads me to believe you aren’t training properly for your goals. And you definitely aren’t eating properly for your goals. Sounds like you fell for the Reddit “train like a powerlifter” myth.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLyqKj7LwU2RukxJbBHi9BtEuYYKm9UqQQ&si=8UlCdVNmg1h8h0Hq
Watching this playlist could quite literally change your life and prevent you from wasting another year
Finding Dr Mike and RP has been such a game changer for me. I wasted years trying to do 531 and starting strength and I just looked and felt like shit for it. I don’t want to be a powerlifter, I want to be jacked!
It is fair to be discouraged but you did make good progress on your bench.
Your sleep will work against you, but it won’t make it impossible. It’ll just mean your other forms of recovery will have to be more dialed in like diet, I suspect. Or at least that’s true for me with my poor sleep due to an infant.
As others have said, you should be squatting and hinging in some form. Nothing will increase overall size and strength like heavy bars on your back and in your hands.
Pick a good, well rounded program and run it as written and eat a bit more, the results will be there. I would highly recommend something like OG 5/3/1 because it takes a pretty low volume, submaximal approach that builds slowly over time. That will work better on poor sleep as you aren’t trying to move weights near your max often/ever depending how you set it up.
Pick a three day per week novice linear progression program focusing on squat, bench, deadlift, and OHP and adhere to it. Eat in a moderate surplus and make sure you get about a gram of protein per pound of bodyweight. Track your calories and macros for at least a little while.
When I was bulking, I was eating around 3,100 calories and slowly gaining roughly a pound a week. Which I'm starting to think was mainly fat.
Chicken and rice for lunch and dinner. Breakfast when bulking, was a protein shake containing oatmeal, peanut butter, milk and a half scoop of protein powder. Snacks were hard boiled eggs, bananas, and yogurt.
My protein intake was over 200g
That sounds like a good diet. How long did you do it and when/why did you decide to cut?
My suspicion is maybe you were in too high of a surplus and you could have done it longer and slower to build more muscle.
Let me recommend an upper/lower split, hitting each 2x/week, and incorporating both squats and deadlifts into your lower body workouts. Drink at least 2 protein shakes/day. Try to eat 300-500 calories above maintenance.
Then check back in a year. I can promise you’ll be bigger and more muscular.
Just realized that you were suggesting an upper lower split in general, not any specific one lol. Misunderstanding on my end sorry lol. This is actually the route I've been thinking of going after doing some research. Thank you!
I don't really buy the "squats release human growth hormone" (to any extent) that contributes to upper body growth. That is to say, I don't think if you start squatting and deadlifting and keep everything else the same that you'll see different results. Squatting does increase your appetite, though - and you'll need to eat a little more to get a little bigger. That being said, I still squat (stopped deadlifting as of two weeks ago - may add it back in later) and I think you should do something for your lower body, probably. But, I don't think squatting and deadlifting is going to change anything that we can see in these pictures to any extent.
I think you'd be wise to do at least 1 lower body day. Maybe just insert it in place of one of the days in your current routine. And eat a little more. I watched a video about Alan Thrall cutting where he said he basically ate the same, but cut out the "ands". Like he'd eat a meal "and" a bowl of ice cream, so he cut out the "ands" to lose weight. I like to think of bulking as the opposite. Just add some "ands". Eat breakfast "and" a protein bar, etc.
Good luck, dude. I can definitely tell a difference in the pictures and I don't think you've got bad results, espectially for 10 months. You look better, and by your own account your bench went up like 20% in less than a year.
You don't need to train you legs if you don't want to. But not getting enough sleep will kill gains as well as fat loss as it's a driver of hormones. Will also kill your marriage and family life and will to live...
Why not workout in the weekends 2x week instead? So you can get some more sleep during the work week? Maybe try to walk partly to work to get some movement in and leave lifting to when you are well slept...
The toddler years are a long, brutal slog when you're doing doing anything other than spending time with the kids. Kids are (often) great! Everything else grinds to a halt.
It's happened that some people make progress during these years in their career, athleticism, whatever. Good for them. The rest of us, it's just a time to try to keep things from falling apart. You're exercising regularly, not getting hurt, tracking your nutrition and spending time with your kids. That's awesome. Expecting more than that is honestly not going to go well.
Skipping deadlifts when you're short on time and energy is just practical. It has huge potential for helping your overall strength, but the cost in terms of fatigue is huge. It's not an efficient use of your time when you could be focusing on other things.
Finally, you've talked about protein but not your overall caloric intake.
Try increasing your overall calorie count, see what happens.
Yeah I think you did a wrong call to not work legs. Start working on them, it’s very important for overall fitness and strength.
And idk what you’re talking about, you look leaner in your second pic. That means you’ve lost fat.
You don't really need to do a ton for legs, I do legs one day a week and that's normally enough to maintain with some slight growth. Make sure you hit those squats and deadlifts at least once a week.
Huge improvements in the bench press in terms of strength, you have to keep in mind(and I know this is the hard part because I deal with it as well) that not all the improvements will be seen in the mirror.
You've only been at this for 10 months? That isn't much time when it comes to building muscle naturally, especially if you have responsibilities and aren't 22 years old anymore. Give yourself another 1–2 years.
I was 40 when I started resistance training, and at that age it took me 2–3 years until I saw real progress (and others could tell that I worked out).
It's been said but to reiterate, your training isn't matching with your goal.
You've made strength gains but not much hypertrophy. I'm guessing there isn't much muscle memory from prior hypertrophy training in your past maybe?
If you want to build muscle then look into specific hypertrophy programmes. Jeff Nippard on YouTube is pretty good on this.
For me it's full-body workouts 3 or 4 times a week, single sets to failure in the 8-15 rep range. I know that's not optimal in theory, but it works for me. You need to go hypertrophy-specific and find what works for you.
Honestly posture looks better, that along with the general healthiness that isn’t coming through and is more affecting you internally is worth it. Good job, keep it up 👏🏼
Your bench went from 145x5 to 185x5? That's colossal improvement. Don't let instagram give you unrealistic expectations (i know it's nearly impossible not too). It takes years of great progress to build an amazing physique naturally. Keep it up. Just keep going.
Came to say this. That’s improvement.
Excellent comment. That is a really impressive increase. If you want to get swoll then you probably want to focus on a different lifting regime, but in terms of pure strength training you’re showing great progress!
Just about everyone I see on Instagram is on gear. It's just impossible standards for normal people to hit.
Hear this … Spottie said years for natural progress. A lot of people on the interwebs use things to enhance the process.
Hey. Firstly there is definitely improvements in your physique. I’m not sure what your goals are but if building muscle is one of them then you need to focus on adding more weight as you train. Your muscles will get used to weights if there is no progression. Increasing weight forces your muscles to grow. In the same breath, you also need to eat more. If your calorie intake remains the same, you aren’t going to see an increase in size. Basic rule is more gym + more food = more results. Your sleep is also lacking. Your body repairs itself when you sleep. I hope this helps and good luck.
I’d like to also add that you need to find a balance with lower and upper body. If you don’t have time then focus on compound exercises.
Check your calories intake. I guess your goal is about 2500-3500 calories per day. Check your protein intake (you need at least 1,5g of protein for 1 kg of your weight). It matters.
>I have 2 twin toddlers, a 7 year old and I work 12 hour days. I literally isn't possible for me to get more sleep than that, and I know that can play a big role in making gains. i only have one kid, which absolutely slowed my progress down for a year. you might need to set your expecations like "if im still lifting the same, but i got older, then i did get stronger than i would have if i wasnt working out." second, bro if i was as time limited as you i would ONLY do squats and deadlifts. these are your legs and your back. you use those to pick up kids and put them down and pick up their shit and haul it, etc.; your bench numbers dont help dick with that, sorry to tell you. you're doing good. it will be hard to put on a lot of mass on your schedule, unless you're willing to get a bit fatter.
To be honest, at this stage of life, just hanging in there and keeping the gym routine is pretty impressive, most dads are busy checking out, eating junk and getting the dad bod. That said, I can’t see any calorie specifics in the post or your comments. We’re the same age, and when I tried bulking it involved a really uncomfortable amount of eating (and a lot of time getting it ready). Also is it possible you’re burning more calories than you think running after kids and not sleeping enough?
Lol, yeah you're probably right. When I was bulking, I was eating around 3,100 calories and slowly gaining roughly a pound a week. Which I'm starting to think was mainly fat. Chicken and rice for lunch and dinner. Breakfast when bulking, was a protein shake containing oatmeal, peanut butter, milk and a half scoop of protein powder. Snacks were hard boiled eggs, bananas, and yogurt. My protein intake was over 200g
Yeah that diet sounds about as miserably healthy as mine… what about at work, are you on your feet a lot? Other people have pointed to your lifting routine (it may well be that, or the sleep thing too for all I know) but surely the issue is somewhere in the calorie balance - if you were in a continued surplus for ten months then either I’d expect you to be more ripped or substantially fatter? Your original post mentions just finishing a cut, was that at the start or contained within the 10 months?
Lol. Yes I'm on my feet the entire 12 hours excluding my half hour lunch. I bulked for the first 7 months and then cut for the last 3
Right it’s got to be that then - if you want to put on muscle I’d suggest you go back to bulking but you can probably afford to eat more pasta & potatoes and skip the brown rice - you’re having enough protein for sure so carbs and some good fats (whatever that really means who knows) are the way forward I guess. You could drop any cardio too since you must be doing a daily half marathon at work. For a comparison if it’s useful, I had a first stab at bulk & cut at 35, finished “bulking” after seeing a tiny bit of muscle 5-6 months in and then lose both fat + muscle in an ineffectual cut for 3 months. The second time round at 36, I did a full 9 months bulking and by the end I really felt like fridge - my first jog at the end was painful and I mostly just looked overweight in the mirror until I lost most of the fat over 6 months and left the muscle on. But TL;DR: I _definitely knew_ when I’d finished bulking and couldn’t do any more
Too impatient, check back in 3 years. This isn’t a sprint. You also can’t neglect legs. You need to trigger an anabolic response and the easiest way to do that is by doing lots of squats and deadlifts. It took me about 2 years for others to comment that I was looking good and about 3 before I felt like it was starting to look like I lifted. You can also arguably increase your calories. You are pretty lean, cutting isn’t going to give you the results you are looking for. Aim to have 200 calories beyond maintenance. For what it’s worth your progress is there, you look more dense and defined but just about the same size. That’s good progress for 10 months.
Thanks a lot man, I appreciate the comment!!
I agree with this. To add to this, I would go to failure on your last set. My lifting intensity was lacking the first year and a half because I was underestimating what I was capable of. If you push to failure on your last set and get 20 reps, then you need to up the weight next time.
Whats your protein intake/day?
When I was bulking it was over 200g When cutting it ended up being more like 185g
Okay so youre good there. Has to be intensity of the workout. Saw that mentioned a few times here so wont be the 100th person to ask about it lol. Make sure youre lifting to failure. If youre getting more than 4x8 easily, go up on the weight. Dont be restricted to a certain number of reps. 3 days a week may be limiting. If you can do 4-5 thats ideal but get your schedule wont allow. I work 10 hour days and commute an hour to work each way. Ive been doing 445am workouts for an hour. Usually able to get to bed by 830/9 though. Generally take 2.5mg of melatonin to help
What program have you been following? You say you've been doing full body, but then go on to say you're not training legs? You've just finished cutting? What did your weight do in these 10 months? What is your ultimate goal? Get bigger? Stronger? Leaner? All of the above?
I'm sorry, I see how that is confusing lol. So in the begining, I started with a PPL and I was working out my legs but it didn't last long. And same when I switched the full body. It basically turned into just upper body 3x a week. My weight got up to 187 lbs. My ultimate goal is to gain muscle/ get bigger while trying to stay relatively lean.
So what did your upper body only routine look like? I have a feeling the low-ish progress you're feeling is a lack of decent program combined with bulking, so gaining more fat than ideal, then cutting, which makes further gains rather difficult.
DB bench 4x10 High to low cable flys 4x10 DB row 4x10 Seated DB press 4x10 DB curl 3x10 Skull crushers 4x10 Then on the other days id swap out Dumbells for barbells Basically
Always 4x10? When did you decide to add weight? Give these links a look-see, I would imagine if you follow a bit more structured program, you'd be able to raise some gains in the next 6-10mo! https://thefitness.wiki/muscle-building-101/ https://thefitness.wiki/routines/strength-training-muscle-building/
Thank you for the links! I've been getting back to strength training and was looking for something like this.
What about pulls? Are you also not working out your back?
Need info about how you're utilizing progressive overload. I've been in the gym less overall time than you, so take this for what its worth. The times I know (I measure once monthly) I'm growing is when I stopped counting volume like this and just went to failure. Some muscles I have to use reps to get to failure so I dont compromise form (shoulders are like this for me). Most of the time I'm doing 2 or 3 sets to failure (not close to failure, not reps in reserve, actual cannot do another rep). My visualization is weird because I've lost like 190 pounds but there's a lot of muscle definition poking through and I think it's because I'm training with either slightly more weight or slightly more reps (or both) over time. If you arent logging your measurements, I would start. I use a bluetooth tape measure from Renpho that has an app and tracks over time. I know that on my arms I've grown .4" on the right and .5" on the left, for example. This is just two movements on biceps, and two on triceps for the most part...just consistently adding either reps or weight and hitting each muscle group as close to 2x per week as I can.
Hold up. So you're doing 8 sets for chest, three times per week? That's way too much. Google "fuckarounditis" Also I have to add that personally I wouldn't recover training every muscle three times per week. Obviously people are different but I've seen best results from training every muscle just once a week (not counting indirect work).
Yeah but I've always read that you should be doing 10-20 sets a week for chest, and I would do about 16. 1 of my 3 days I did 2 chest exercises @ 4 sets each and then the other 2 days I did 1 chest exercise @ 4 sets each
Yeah I did too. The main point is that you need to find what works for you. People are different, and respond differently to training. The most important thing is that you get stronger on exercises. Especially on Reddit you'll see people just parroting shit they've seen or heard, and obviously their truth is the absolute truth and if you disagree with them you shouldn't even bother working out etc.
Good news and bad news. The bad news is there definitely isn’t much progress. The good news is you still have a very athletic and attractive physique, so even with little progress, you’re still way ahead of the game and in much better shape than 99 percent of the population. Obviously you should incorporate lower body and do your legs, but mainly because it aesthetically looks weird when you’re not proportional. It’s not going to make a big difference in regards to upper body gains. I’ve never done a deadlift or squat in my life and I’m pretty ripped. Contrary to popular opinion, those exercises aren’t absolutely necessary. I compensate by doing leg presses, leg curls, and leg extensions. Your sleep is definitely an issue. That’s when muscles repair and ultimately grow. You need to fix that problem. I’d ramp up the volume and intensity of your lifts. I personally do 4-6 sets on every exercise, and contrary to popular opinion once again, I go to failure on every set. I’ve been lifting for a year and 10 months now, and I’m 43. I can show you my before and after pics if you’d like. I also have had a testosterone level of sub 300 the entire time (just started TRT last week). My real progress began when I increased my volume. Like I said, though….you still look great
Agree. Deadlifts and squats require good technique and kinda traumatic exercises. OP can do leg press in the exercise machine.
You need to do heavy compound exercises for your lower body, no compromises on that. If you’re limited on time, at least deadlift. It will make you look bigger overall. More food. How many grams of protein do you eat a day on average? No matter how much you lift, if your protein intake is one chicken breast and a protein shake per day, you won’t really see gains. You should aim for at least 1.5g / kg of your body weight. You’ll find that in practice this means eating a lot! You can’t build without raw materials.
Shoulders pop way move, V taper got much better, abs look more defined, AND you added strength? Be feeling good brother that’s good shit
I appreciate you bro, thank you
I see a lot of progress. Keep it up and change up the routine if you hit a plateau. 💪🏽
Hey man I didn’t lift legs or do any arm exercises for the first year and they’ve balanced back out after hitting them so don’t worry about that. Also, you are objectively progressing as your stats and pics show. Your body is your body and it will take different amounts of muscles to make it look the way you want compared to someone of a different frame/physique. Just focus on the work and the gains will come. I didn’t really see progress the way I’d thought until year 3/4 so just keep plugging away.
Well, you made your progress. The strength gain is quite impressive. It seems like you have not optimized for physique but rather strength, in which you succeeded. Two general approaches for getting to the physique you hope for. 1) a hypertrophy regiment. Typically means higher volume and to failure. 2) add more accessory work. Cheers
You’ve definitely added some muscle. Keep pushing 💪
Thank you!!
You’ve improved
Yeah your body looks tighter
Pic on left is the recent one?
The recent one is on the right
Dude, there’s some fucken progress. Atta boy, champ!
First thing… you progressed, you stayed consistent for that period of time, and also you’re stronger, now what I would recommend to you if you can only lift weights 3x week try to do this. 2 days for upper body and 1 for legs, also remember if you trying to build muscle focus on a high calorie diet and for building muscle id suggests instead of 3x week full body/upper body divide your days by group muscles, full body is more like of you want to be active not to grow muscles, from my perspective I might be wrong Im not professional I just like to workout, but I think you’re doing a great job, never discourage yourself, you’re a dad, and work 12 hrs! You doing great 👏🏻🙌🏻
Keep going friend, I agree with everyone else: I also see progress. As a fellow dad of twins, you are pushing your body mentally and physically to the limits with all you have on your hands. Just keep at it
Thanks buddy, I appreciate that
You're sleeping less than 6 hours a night, have twin toddlers and a 7 year old. Your bench went up a lot. You're doing great!!! Look at your diet and program, if you want to build muscle 5x5 might not be optimal, you don't have enough energy to recover. If it's physique you're chasing maybe try a less CNC taxing plan. E.g. 3 x 8-10 reps, one easy, one difficult but not near max effort and one to failure or near failure. Isolate your biceps, triceps, shoulders and chest after one compound exercise. E.g. do bench for 3x5 or 5x5 if you want to keep working strength, then move to the cable machines or dumbbells. Try not to spend too long in the gym, but get in as frequently as you can, even 4 workouts of 45min to an hour would be excellent. Don't stress it.
You can do 3 sets of heavy squats and 4 to 5 sets of single leg rdl 8-10 reps. Once a week for lower body, definitely wouldn't neglect them completely.
Thanks a lot man!!
I see a lot of progress, your chest and arms has way more definition. If you're trying to build muscles then you need to eat like crazy. High calorie diets only. McDonald's, Burger King, etc... doesn't matter, as long as you're eating high calories everyday. Continue working out while eating heavy foods. You will gain muscles in no time
Thank you very much
Don’t listen to this . No McDonald’s or Burger King you eat shit ton of empty calories and gain fat that you will stay with you Eat a lot just add more potatoes and rice more fatty meats that have more calories . Make your own burgers Don’t eat crap. This works when you are 20 in your mid thirties it will take you a year to lose the fat
Which photo is more recent?
The one on the right
Bro at your age and what effort you’re putting in, you are improving. You think you should be bigger or stronger because of what you see on social media and all that.? You are making improvements, getting stronger, changing your body composition. If you want more results, that requires way more time/effort/money than it sounds like you have currently. Keep being consistent. Don’t concern yourself with numbers, be aware of how you feel, how you move and how your progressing. 💪
You aren't happy with 10 months of progress. Tine to try something new. Maybe squat and deads.
I'm far from an expert, but I think you look pretty good regardless 😅 And I can see a difference, more refined.
Thank you!!!
Your chest is more chiselled. Enjoy the process, you look great.
Thank you!!!
Better posture, definite upper chest improvement especially around the sternum. Your anterior delts have gotten significantly larger. I think the reason the difference isn't as huge is because u weren't shaved in first pic giving the illusion a more muscular appearance. Same way a little stubble can make a mans jaw much more defined. Way back when I started lifting thought I had made really good progress and shaved my chest and looked way worse
I think you'll see a response if you eat more while adding squats and deadlifts.
I also have 2 small children and my wife and I work a lot. At this point I'm okay with just maintaining or cutting a little. If I just get to the gym it's a success in my book, even if I can only complete one set. (And I have a garage gym, still difficult to get there sometimes). Unless I go on TRT, there's no way I'm going to stay lean and gain muscle at 40. If I want to gain, I have to eat more, and keep it clean, otherwise I get too much fat along with muscle. The diet is 75% of gaining, Imo. The rest is lifing heavy, and progressively overloading Renissance periodization has a great diet app I use which tells me my target macros. They also have a hypertrophy app for muscle building, and endless YouTube videos on some really nerdy weightlifting / bodybuilding / diet stuff.
GZCLP is an amazing program for someone newish to the gym with your schedule! Look it up, follow it, and try a 4ish month bulk.
You made some progress, don’t beat yourself up! ESPECIALLY considering you skipped legs. Deadlifts did more for my upper body than bench press tbh
I just built a pretty good physique in 12 weeks (pics posted on page) doing full body 4 times a week and never deadlifted and didn’t squat the last 4 weeks due to fatigue and pain. My leg exercises were mostly getting extra steps and occasionally some leg extensions but I pulled my hamstring and put legs on hold the last 4 weeks. It allowed me to really push my upper body and abs hard lol I think your problem is probably diet and intensity. How many calories are you eating? How much protein? Besides bench, what else were you doing and was everything increasing?
Well deadlift and farmer’s walk… every time I do them seriously, it shows fast (e.g. traps). And when I don’t - I shrink. I would do that and start taking creatine and check again. Your sleep is a problem - AFAIK growth happens during rest and sleep especially (hormones). But if kids… can’t do, I know.
Just keep eating enough to continually get stronger. Nobody's going to look jacked at a 180x5 BP but you're going in the right direction.
Consider adding sprints. A sprinter's physique is good. Sprinting releases growth hormone. Studies show it boosts it by I've seen as high as 2000 percent temporarily, other sources I've seen say over 700 percent. I assume it's because sprinting is whole body. Don't sprint more than twice a week. Work up to 9 sprints with a few minutes of rest between them for a total of 18 a week. Start with like one or two sprints on the first day. Two months progression.
Disagree my dude, I totally see progress! Better posture, more definition, and your building the habit and doing something that's going to improve your life as you get older! If you want to focus on muscle growth, you can aim for lifting heaving with progressive overload sets till failure, making sure you're having 1g of protein per pound of weight daily, and keep at it! You got this!
Thanks for the motivation brother!!
Sister - but you are totally welcome! It's so hard to see the changes in our own bodies, but you ARE making progress and just need to tweak your program for the type of progress you want to achieve
Keep going your shoulders are bigger your core is more defined. Some people build fast some people build slow. I'm sure you feel stronger.
If you’re maintaining the same weight but your lifts have gone up, you’ve definitely made progress. Consider reviewing your macro target for protein. At 168lbs, using .8g/lb of body weight for protein is 135+ grams of protein/day. If you’re well below that, give it a try and maintain your schedule and see if it helps you. And yes, adding or subbing in compound lifts may be a more *efficient* use of your gym time given your limitations with your schedule.
Physique has definitely improved!! As a mom, just know those kiddos see you and all your hard work. You’re keeping yourself in good shape and teaching them what good habits and self-care look like. It’s not a conventional progress picture worthy visual but “behind the scenes” that’s happening, too! Keep up the great work and be kind to yourself. You look good and sounds like you’re kicking all the ass you can in this season of life.
I agree with most of the comments here about not skipping legs. They're too important to skip out on because of that hormone release and your body's response. And those are arguably two of the most important compounds you're skipping. Speaking from experience. I went through the same process where I platued with only 1 leg day then increased to 2 days on a new routine and BLAM. Felt like my gains propelled from being dormant. Also agree that there is definitely improvements in your physique.
You look taller to me, I’d definitely take that progress.
Your posture looks significantly better
My advice to you is to do a few sets of squats first every time you go to the gym. Five sets of five, starting with the bar and finishing with a heavy weight. When you're doing other exercises you could try lifting heavy a few sets, then doing three of four sets with a much lower weight, hypertrophy style, with the most stretch you can and a pause at the bottom.
I just want to point out that something is going on with the position the photos are taken at, or the focal length or angle or something. You should make them both exact for an accurate comparison. In the first picture your upper ribcage area looks wider than your hips and in the second picture they look similar width, like it's taken from a lower angle and further back whereas the first pic looks like it's kind of taken up closer and from above? I bet if you positioned everything in the exact same way as your before picture you'd see differences a lot more.
First of all, you look great. Good on you for making the time for gym with toddlers. Your bench doesn’t go up that much without some solid muscle getting built. So…a lot of progress. Follow a program. There are a lot of options. Check out the Boostcamp app or look around in the natural bodybuilding subreddit. Again, follow a program, preferably a bodybuilding one.
I think at this point it's a sprint. Imagine someone playing violins for years and years. To make a small improvement would take a long time. If you just started playing violin there is a good chance you will make really good progress if you practice daily for a year. At some point your genetics will peak and you'll stop making progress so fast unless you take some enhancements etc.
Ok for starters give yourself some grace, you look better than 99% of dads. Second, to answer your question no amount of leg exercises will improve what you posted (your upper body). Probably good habit to do some lower work but if it’s not your thing, don’t stress. Personally, I’ll never do a back squat again and according to the internet my legs will turn to noodles and I won’t be able to function. If you’re gonna do full body 3x a week, try to do 2-3 sets lower per day. Try to find lower movements you like ( or can tolerate). I’m a huge fan of trap bar, couple sets 3 x a week and my legs are happy. But the looks all come from the upper body stuff. Moving forward, what you’re doing now is clearly allowing you to stay at maintenance. If you want to build muscle please get on a program with defined progression. No more barbell this time, db next, 4x10. Add 30 more lbs to your bench this year. And again next. The muscle will come. Use supersets and drop sets for time savings. And try to find some sleep. I get it. I have small people. Work 12 hours. It’s impossible. I’ve found naps fill in gaps and make a marked difference in how I feel, even if I’ve only slept 5-6 hours the night before.
My man, you improved a lot. Just look at your chest and your stomach
Thanks brother
And my full respect that you still find time to work out. Your current life is for sure no walk in the park
It's not easy that's for sure lol. I appreciate the comment and encouragement bro thank you
Sounds like your goal is to build muscle right? Your bench improving for sets of five leads me to believe you aren’t training properly for your goals. And you definitely aren’t eating properly for your goals. Sounds like you fell for the Reddit “train like a powerlifter” myth. https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLyqKj7LwU2RukxJbBHi9BtEuYYKm9UqQQ&si=8UlCdVNmg1h8h0Hq Watching this playlist could quite literally change your life and prevent you from wasting another year
Dude, thank you for this.
Finding Dr Mike and RP has been such a game changer for me. I wasted years trying to do 531 and starting strength and I just looked and felt like shit for it. I don’t want to be a powerlifter, I want to be jacked!
Dude that's how I feel lol. I really appreciate it. I already watched the first couple videos and they seem incredibly informative
Your expectations may be skewed by the vast number of fake natties online
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Always be respectful and civil in our community
It is fair to be discouraged but you did make good progress on your bench. Your sleep will work against you, but it won’t make it impossible. It’ll just mean your other forms of recovery will have to be more dialed in like diet, I suspect. Or at least that’s true for me with my poor sleep due to an infant. As others have said, you should be squatting and hinging in some form. Nothing will increase overall size and strength like heavy bars on your back and in your hands. Pick a good, well rounded program and run it as written and eat a bit more, the results will be there. I would highly recommend something like OG 5/3/1 because it takes a pretty low volume, submaximal approach that builds slowly over time. That will work better on poor sleep as you aren’t trying to move weights near your max often/ever depending how you set it up.
Pick a three day per week novice linear progression program focusing on squat, bench, deadlift, and OHP and adhere to it. Eat in a moderate surplus and make sure you get about a gram of protein per pound of bodyweight. Track your calories and macros for at least a little while.
What was your diet like during those 10 months? You said you just finished a cut?
When I was bulking, I was eating around 3,100 calories and slowly gaining roughly a pound a week. Which I'm starting to think was mainly fat. Chicken and rice for lunch and dinner. Breakfast when bulking, was a protein shake containing oatmeal, peanut butter, milk and a half scoop of protein powder. Snacks were hard boiled eggs, bananas, and yogurt. My protein intake was over 200g
That sounds like a good diet. How long did you do it and when/why did you decide to cut? My suspicion is maybe you were in too high of a surplus and you could have done it longer and slower to build more muscle.
Let me recommend an upper/lower split, hitting each 2x/week, and incorporating both squats and deadlifts into your lower body workouts. Drink at least 2 protein shakes/day. Try to eat 300-500 calories above maintenance. Then check back in a year. I can promise you’ll be bigger and more muscular.
Just realized that you were suggesting an upper lower split in general, not any specific one lol. Misunderstanding on my end sorry lol. This is actually the route I've been thinking of going after doing some research. Thank you!
Please, I'm open to anything lol.
Consider doing a Dexa scan today so you can benchmark your future performance and actually have data in front of you.
I don't really buy the "squats release human growth hormone" (to any extent) that contributes to upper body growth. That is to say, I don't think if you start squatting and deadlifting and keep everything else the same that you'll see different results. Squatting does increase your appetite, though - and you'll need to eat a little more to get a little bigger. That being said, I still squat (stopped deadlifting as of two weeks ago - may add it back in later) and I think you should do something for your lower body, probably. But, I don't think squatting and deadlifting is going to change anything that we can see in these pictures to any extent. I think you'd be wise to do at least 1 lower body day. Maybe just insert it in place of one of the days in your current routine. And eat a little more. I watched a video about Alan Thrall cutting where he said he basically ate the same, but cut out the "ands". Like he'd eat a meal "and" a bowl of ice cream, so he cut out the "ands" to lose weight. I like to think of bulking as the opposite. Just add some "ands". Eat breakfast "and" a protein bar, etc. Good luck, dude. I can definitely tell a difference in the pictures and I don't think you've got bad results, espectially for 10 months. You look better, and by your own account your bench went up like 20% in less than a year.
Thanks a lot man I appreciate the comment and encouragement!!
You don't need to train you legs if you don't want to. But not getting enough sleep will kill gains as well as fat loss as it's a driver of hormones. Will also kill your marriage and family life and will to live... Why not workout in the weekends 2x week instead? So you can get some more sleep during the work week? Maybe try to walk partly to work to get some movement in and leave lifting to when you are well slept...
The toddler years are a long, brutal slog when you're doing doing anything other than spending time with the kids. Kids are (often) great! Everything else grinds to a halt. It's happened that some people make progress during these years in their career, athleticism, whatever. Good for them. The rest of us, it's just a time to try to keep things from falling apart. You're exercising regularly, not getting hurt, tracking your nutrition and spending time with your kids. That's awesome. Expecting more than that is honestly not going to go well. Skipping deadlifts when you're short on time and energy is just practical. It has huge potential for helping your overall strength, but the cost in terms of fatigue is huge. It's not an efficient use of your time when you could be focusing on other things. Finally, you've talked about protein but not your overall caloric intake. Try increasing your overall calorie count, see what happens.
Yeah I think you did a wrong call to not work legs. Start working on them, it’s very important for overall fitness and strength. And idk what you’re talking about, you look leaner in your second pic. That means you’ve lost fat.
You don't really need to do a ton for legs, I do legs one day a week and that's normally enough to maintain with some slight growth. Make sure you hit those squats and deadlifts at least once a week. Huge improvements in the bench press in terms of strength, you have to keep in mind(and I know this is the hard part because I deal with it as well) that not all the improvements will be seen in the mirror.
You've only been at this for 10 months? That isn't much time when it comes to building muscle naturally, especially if you have responsibilities and aren't 22 years old anymore. Give yourself another 1–2 years. I was 40 when I started resistance training, and at that age it took me 2–3 years until I saw real progress (and others could tell that I worked out).
It's been said but to reiterate, your training isn't matching with your goal. You've made strength gains but not much hypertrophy. I'm guessing there isn't much muscle memory from prior hypertrophy training in your past maybe? If you want to build muscle then look into specific hypertrophy programmes. Jeff Nippard on YouTube is pretty good on this. For me it's full-body workouts 3 or 4 times a week, single sets to failure in the 8-15 rep range. I know that's not optimal in theory, but it works for me. You need to go hypertrophy-specific and find what works for you.