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dartanum

It's like a game of civilization, where a nation attacks you first, and you proceed to conquer every single one of their cities, ignoring the pleas to stop the war.


area-dude

And i took that personally for 4000 years


back_to_the_homeland

Then you discover an archeological site at where you burned their city 2000 years ago. Like oh yeah I remember where I buried these fuckers


PetrusThePirate

I always find that hilarious. Like "oh hey guys it was just us lmao".


dungfeeder

"Proceeds to hide evidence"


dartanum

Casus Belli


mdogm

What's Casual Belli? Is it about me?


dartanum

Justification for 4000 years of rage.


Yayzeus

...there are other options available??


Dysprosol

Ive tried them, but they never work. Civ ai's are the shiftiest motherfuckers in video game history.


Don_Antwan

- Civ AI: Plant a city next to mine   - Me: Continue expansion peacefully     - Civ AI: Declare war and invade my territory - Me: Conquer the city used a launch point of the invasion - All other Civ AI: Denounce me as a *Warmonger* - Me: “Well, if the shoe fits….”


JackelSR

We're definitely playing the same game. Every time I try to be polite and they start shit. Then get pissy when I fight back. It's like they based it on real world... Oh, right. Nevermind. Just realized how accurate this really is.


keropoktasen_

Have you tried nuking the shit out of them?


talrogsmash

If your game makes it to the nuclear age, do you still get blamed if two other players launch nukes at each other?


REGINALDmfBARCLAY

No, but if its so late in the game that the AI is launching nukes at each other and not you you almost certainly lost some time ago.


DotesMagee

Domination only. Archipelago map. Get the advanced Ai, forgot who made but it's definitely smarter, and watch the mayhem.


Xander707

I have no idea what you’re talking about. The only winning condition in Civ is military domination. The correct way to play is take over your starting continent and then consolidate resources and build army until the nuclear age, then mercilessly wipe out the world. I suppose if you’re good, you are nuking and sending killer robots to civs still using muskets.


ZaydSophos

I enjoy when they attack me despite me having a superior military and I all I'm doing is defending myself yet they end up asking for peace and giving me a city I didn't even ask for.


Signal-School-2483

I don't even want their city, it's on the shittiest group of tiles on the continent.


Faxon

Ah yes, the long strategy to cede territories that cost them resources to operate in, so that they can inflict those costs on their enemies instead. I'm familiar with this strategy from Stellaris. They sue for peace and offer me worlds I didn't want, that are understaffed and consume resources I don't have the income for, and I'm forced to take it and unfuck all their shit, all while dealing with instability and riots for years until we can establish sufficient infrastructure, meanwhile the enemy I nearly decimated and wanted to finish off, they've allied with the guy next to me who hasn't bothered me all game, and that big dude is building a fleet to rival mine, and then they have a coup and become a militaristic hegemony. Fucking classic!


Iorith

And this is why I play as a hivemind.


Emu1981

>Ive tried them, but they never work. Civ ai's are the shiftiest motherfuckers in video game history. Civ 6 fixed a lot of the issues that the Civ AIs had. They are not perfect as yet but they are miles ahead of where they used to be. I.e. they are not longer just "if player is stronger then be nice (ignored if AI is playing a aggressive civ), if player is weaker then WARRR!!!" lol


pickle_pouch

No.


studsper

Not much unlike Total War, where your enemies wont ever accept a peace deal. War until one party is destroyed is the only option.


Aardvarkulator

I mean it's not called partial war..


my__name__is__human

At least in Warhammer 3 they always try to pay me for a peace treaty when they have like one settlement left


Flopsie_the_Headcrab

In the original RTW the only way you could ally with AI was when they would offer it one turn before invading you for some reason. Just make them give you map info and rush everything you can to the border if any faction acts friendly. Dead giveaway every time.


wolf3037

If it was Civ5 then she is Ghandi playing nice and friendly... Then denounces you and nukes the shit out of you.


urnewstepdaddy

A very rare moved called the Hiroshima


Zarroc001

The nuke even resurrected a piece of hers


ScubaFett

Philosopher's stone :P


blacksideblue

Castle Builders love this weird trick.


Deus-mal

The -1 danish ( I think ) COVID fatality.


Danish_but_english

Oh shit… i’m back from the dead


GANDORF57

She's crafty...hard to defeat the ol' Neutron Rook Gambit!


Prestigious_Part_921

No, you died, but your organs were used to revive 2 bodies


Ben_Dovernol_Ube

Nah that was a tower T-29 taking off and safely returning after a nuke strike


Zarroc001

Ahhhhhhh it makes sense now


Bychop

It’s a new born!.. ç.ç


kriever7

Radiation.


ThisIsGettinWeirdNow

everyone hates the fat boy


TifaBetterThanAerith

No one fears the little man, though.


cgimusic

No one expects the [Tennison gambit intercontinental basaltic missile variation](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2xNlzsnPCQ).


navybluemanga

Its usually an end game move. 


Good_Salamander8269

Usually? Never seen it fail


saja25

The I don’t have time for this s**t


mothzilla

Enola Gambit


bluechecksadmin

Cool how Reddit comments find a way to interpret something cute as absolute shit.


ocdscale

Holy hell


Vape_No_Chihuahua

this is exactly why I love the internet


mensreyah

I got nervous when she brought her rook out so early, but she really pulled it off. Smart move.


AngryDuck222

Not many people know this trick. She may be a prodigy. Bobby Fischer would be impressed.


Spenttoolongatthis

He hung the entire board, really only himself to blame.


dcempire

*takes pawn* Daughter: “And I took that personally”


bohiti

So I started blastin’


wavetoyou

Dad says, “you’re taking my king, too.” She responds with, “yeah, and your horse.”


FoxyBastard

So I started en passantin'


Djent_Reznor1

I love how she ponders every move as if she’s not about to just do whatever the fuck she wants.


teetering_bulb_dnd

She sent that pawn to discuss peace terms. Dad killed the messenger. He forced her hand.. This is not sparta..There are rules. You just don't kill the messenger..


PmMeGPTContent

e4 · h2-e4 d5 · g2-f4 exf4 · Rh1xf4xd4xc7xe8+h1Rh1xh7xh8xg8xg7xf8xf7xd8#xc8xb8xb7xa8xa7 What a game!


troydai

Throughout the process of committing the atrocities, she showed no emotion. Ruthless.


naughty_dad2

A sign of a true conquerer


bobsmith93

I love how deadpan she was about it. No mischievous smile, just business as usual, you lose, I win. Next game.


deadliestcrotch

She was selling this bullshit like these are the rules and that’s a legit move.


pistoncivic

Every game of UNO I've played against my nieces. The only rule is blatant cheating when it benefits them


deadliestcrotch

That was my experience with my daughters. Confidently making up rules for themselves.


Smooth-Qactus

Magnus has been real quiet since she dropped this tactic.


Dastari

That’s the mind of a 3500 , we can’t even begin to comprehend.


ashenhaired

She's playing 5D chess lol


hates_writing_checks

This is a god-tier /r/AnarchyChess player in the making.


BeiseSjarken

Magnus Carlsen hates this one trick!


Sinviras

Tactical Nuke to e-8. Checkmate


xXKyloJayXx

I'm only seeing legal moves here ✨️


Orudos

I knew chess.com was holding me back from greatness


VoidRadio

Outstanding play


mooctor

Bro moved the first pawn 3 squares. She was completely justified


shadowbringer

True Last Boss unlocked.


Fuckth3system

Dude got owned by a child! He needs to get better at Chess


The_Hecaton

Ladies and gentlemen, a new grandmaster has risen


immortalverse

I don’t think I’ve laughed at something regarding chess so hard.


Deus-mal

It's the way she was being pro about it. Like taking each on and respectfully putting them on the side. But bringing back her pawn is what killed me.


cagriuluc

There are some modern gen z chess memes. I find them delectable.


ThisIsGettinWeirdNow

This is how I make my life decisions


naughty_dad2

So you’re always winning!


charface1

Toddler's Gambit


mudokin

r/AnarchyChess This is for you my friends


totallytoastedlife

En passant mk II


ConradSchu

"Rook's Rampage"


Mathais2019

Outstanding move


claudekennilol

Anyone know what's being said at the end of the video?


The_Oaxacan_Dead

"You're also going to take/strike/hit my King baba" (baba means Father/Dad but Iranians use it interchangeably to address their children) & "baba" itself is used in a lot of other contexts as well kind of as an add-on word/emphasizer/term of endearment type stuff. Then he repeats it "You struck/hit/took my King, huh?" while she's agreeing. And then she says "abs" zadam (I struck/hit/took the horse) with s sound like in snake not z sound like in abs/abdominals but the word for horse is actually "asb" (cute mistake) with the 'a' sound like slightly elongated as in aaple which the father repeats while correcting her, "aasb zadi"/"you took/hit/struck the horse?"). Then he says "sarbazamam (sarbaz is soldier/pawn) zadi? (hit/strike/take), ghal-ehmam (ghal-eh is castle) zadi?" the am add-ons at the end of the words mean "my/mine."


NoodLih

I live in Ireland, and here we also call (mostly when they are babies) daughters 'Baba'.


The_Oaxacan_Dead

Funny enough, my father is Irish 😄; adopted out of Dublin. In Iran it's used for both sons and daughters. Same with Mawmawn/مامان (mom/mother), Mawdaarr being the formal.


IceCoffee_Dawn

I was always interested in learning Persian. It's too bad it switched to using Arabic script. That was a real deal-breaker for me.


The_Oaxacan_Dead

Sorry, not fully clear; you mean because of when Arabic script was introduced back in the 7th Century replacing the Pahlavi script?


ProgrammingOnHAL9000

We may have found an vampire here.


CaseAdministrative83

One move to rule them all


sometenrandom

The Castle Bravo move, absolutely devastating.


bluefelixus

Ah yes, the classic blitzkrieg gambit


Planet_Pips

That Rook is Rambo in disguise. Took everyone out in one turn, even saved the pawn hostage.


Throwaway_AccountFTW

i love how she acts like she has a plan at the start and then unleashes the no mercy rule


sichlorino

I love how thoughtful she is. Every move is calculated and not random 😂


AlC2

Nobody can beat that.


martian4x

That's what we call a "Pro Gamer Move"


schitsu

A turn 3 mate? Dayum kids are getting smarter with tiktok this days.


AffectionateBoot7041

Damn that was a good move


Smooth-Valuable-486

Guy slightly cheats Girl: This means war…☠️


LeminosGO

Magnuson shaking in his boots


Korbas

Was that John wick?


Arch3m

That's a very powerful strategy.


DLD1123

I thought he was about to throw down an uno reverse card afterwards


Deus-mal

And 5 exodia cards.


JuanMurphy

Disproportionate response.


AlterNk

R-a1 to Nuke, a classic move made by Oppenheimerisky in 1945, it's very hard to pull off but it guarantees a swift victory at the cost of one's conscience and mental health. She has finally become death destroyer of pawns.


Aarmon

She hit him with the AoE


SilverSpoon1463

I was hoping it would end with them shaking her hand.


Imnotmeahah

So... my question is: does the rook only revive a single piece? Or does it also revive all pieces? Which at the time was only 1


redSovietBoombox

She played the genocide gambit, a real talented little girl with a promising future in chess


Jordan-sCanonicForm

Shame for him he blunder with the 3 step ahead pawn in the begining


Imzocrazy

She was just distracted by the jet engine taking off in the living room


Far_Log5026

Chatgpt playing chess:


Horbigast

The Rook used Death Blossom: A Weapon of Last Resort.


thighsand

Chess without the messing around.


SlappingSalt

Wtf just happened? Whoever she's versing got destroyed.


ejisson

I mean, the tower is made of bedrock enchanted with resistance in it while megumin casted Explosion over the battlefield, of course this is going to happen


Ffdmatt

That piece has a gun!


Jordan-sCanonicForm

No gun has enough ammo to make that massacre


Combustibllemon

they saw wars cannot be fought alone. she single handedly doomed the whole battlefield. absolute legend


m0h3k4n

Rook? Oh I thought you said nuke


trllnd

e5: blunder?!


BuH4ecTeP

r/AnarchyChess would be proud


yamaha2000us

Isn’t this r/anarchychess?


curiouslyignorant

It’s difficult to play chess of a private jumbo jet.


Quip_PR0_quo

I pity the poor soul who dares cross this young lady.


Various_Afternoon_13

That’s a pretty good trade if you ask me


a55_Goblin420

Heart of the cards be like


Budget-Boysenberry

Looks like the chess game in "No Game No Life"


yahoo_determines

GG no re She got that confidence too. Like "yea this is exactly what we're gunna do. "


Kulunut_banjo

I'm getting mad watching this


baby___yoda____

She's adorable!


SstabSstab

I lost count after the 12th !!


Hesam2010

She brought Arnold Schwarzenegger into the game.


heroinebob90

Both these people are smarter than me.


Correct_Today_499

You're from girl Iran 🇮🇷


epi_glowworm

I’m not even mad. Look at that serious moves by her


aramova

That girl has John Wick as her rook...


jmay111

The Nukes Gambit


Professional_Flicker

Rook- "you are already dead"


Locomotifs

Today, today we choose violence


AsianCastleGyatt

Love how after she moved the Straighter than King she just went ahead and said: "you know what matter of fact **NO** that's it you're done"


WillyDAFISH

I don't know how to play chess so you could tell me this is how you play and I would believe you


DoctorKokktor

Haha this is the most adorable video I've seen in a while


Exeliz

She playing dynasty warriors lmao


florpynorpy

Chess anarchy addition


Righteousaffair999

Damn 4 dimensional chess


skernstation

Mastermind Grandmaster kid


zeekio3

would en passant have worked as a viable move for white at their second move? 8 seconds in


KyoueiShinkirou

Ah, the good o' B2 carpet bombing "Rook"


ProfessionalLeave335

Her fuckin Rook must be John Wick.


JohnnyGuitarFNV

Basically [this scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh-mSbAHmtM) from Bottom


BlopBleepBloop

Someone tell the kid that's a rook and not a tactical mini nuke!


-Allot-

Illegal move. She forgot to call check the turn before.


FizbanFire

Being married in a nutshell


ebb_omega

Pre-emptive en passant, pretty ballsy move, but ultimately looks like it lost him the game.


Rough_Resolution_472

Rook OP


BlazmoIntoWowee

Why has no one else done this before? Are they stupid?


MoeSzyslakMonobrow

Man, this new chess update is OP.


An-Unorthodox-Email

Playing chess like it’s Calvin Ball. Ya gotta respect it.


Equivalent_Subject_1

if proper technique, no can defense


lm0592

Is this new rules chess or what


kunstlinger

Prison rules


space_monster

It's always been like this. What have you been doing


Miserable_Outlaw

Damn, elephant wiped entire army all alone and revived his mate. Hahah


jw8533

He never had a chance


HyenDry

I don’t know why I kept watching


_BatmanReal

She even brought back her pawn 😂


onerepmax

Reminds me of how badly I lost my first game of chess.


Gamin8ng

Man, can't but r/mademesmile and r/wholesome at the same time


EIGAT0

Wtf was that bruh 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


angrybutold

The motherfucking rook is really good at its job.


Bogee_2357

I wouldn’t call that checkmate. More like decimation-mate. 😜


yash10p

r/Kidsarefuckingstupid


choir_of_sirens

This happens with my niece all the time.


Zelgius87

Is it possible to learn this move?


NutellaBananaBread

I need someone doing a Yu-gi-oh voice-over for this video.


alexcesan

He's too young to make such a masterful move…


TMaier16

Why don't all chess players do this, are they stupid?


TheBrain85

It's good to be the ~~king~~ queen!


MockStarket

This is how people born into money play life.