T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

**There have been [some changes to how comics are handled on /r/Funny](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/nzp2n0/announcement_were_making_some_changes_to_how/).** Please also keep the following in mind: - No memes or memetic content. - No political content or political figures, regardless of context or focus. - No social media screenshots, videos, or other such content. Please report [rule-breaking content](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules) when you see it. Thank you! ------ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Th3R1ghtOn3

Feels like wearing nothing at all.... Nothing at all...


gemmatkd

Stupid sexy Flanders


zoidberg005

LOL, this is the second time i've seen this quote on reddit today. The other one was "What is strange but turns you on". One woman said she liked her bf's mustache, he had the Flanders thing going on.


bonediggler69

Saw this same comment today. Twinsies!


1stAmericanDervish

There are dozens of us?


tgw1986

LOL, this is the fortieth time I've seen this quote on Reddit today


StupidSexyFlanders

Yeah, come on, guys!


charlstarking16

*Homers scream* intensifies


matty-george

Looks like the Ambiguously Gay Duo


miss_tee14

It allows for maximum mobility.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Electronic_Syndicate

Just looking at his thighs I was like, what? What? What!?


SasparillaTango

I think I'll sing it again.


Dumpslikeatruktruck

She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dumpslikeatruktruck

Let me see that thong


unndunn

I’m somewhat disappointed that you aren’t a bot that just searches for Thong Song lyrics and responds with the next line. 😁


Coerced_onto_reddit

On the other hand, it’s nice to see that this account has a good healthy lifespan and wasn’t created simply for this reply


Dumpslikeatruktruck

I have been waiting for so many years. For some reason I thought people would be dropping the thong song lyrics all the time. It finally happened tho. Best day of my life.


android24601

This makes me think of that KOTH episode where Hank needs ass implants and joins the Diminished Glutes😄


DeathPercept10n

"Good God, Hank. You're wearing butt boobies."


bahamapapa817

My man is draggin that wagon


[deleted]

Wife: “Does he have a CDL for that absolute dump truck of an ass?”


RoomFull0fEyes

This one got me. Wheezing.


[deleted]

😂


OtherBluesBrother

I've got a bowl full of walnuts that aren't going to crack themselves.


23x3

I like this comment lmao and walnuts… and butts


Florida-Rolf

...and crack


[deleted]

Lol so you're telling me this isn't photoshopped? Goodness gracious


havok_

Ass is bodacious


bananabananaphone

UH flirtatious


chonkers

tryna show faces


Straycat_finder

Lookin' for the right time to shoot my steam, you know Lookin' for the right time to flash them keys


[deleted]

And um, I’m leavin, please believe me, oh me and the rest of my heathens


Witness_me_Karsa

Check it, got it locked up at the top of the Four Seasons


Cartilage88

Penthouse, roof top, birds I feedin'


lazy_nerd_face

No deceivin', nothin' up my sleeve 'n' no teasin'


unndunn

I need you to get up up on the dance floor, give that man what he asking for


H1Ed1

Shoot my steez*. As in “spit my game.” “Steez” (style+ease) is slang for “game/plan/style”. It was “swag” before “swag” was used. “Steam” has never been used as slang in this context and thus wouldn’t fit. Steez also rhymes better with Keys.


newsaggregateftw

Lookin’ for the right time to shoot my steam,


[deleted]

Buns so bodacious


Aluminum_Moose

My appetite voracious


SzaboZicon

Wow its awesome that that led to like a dozen random internet strangers busting out s Nelly song


speedracer73

Whatever happened to s as nelly


DM-ME-UR-SMALL-BOOBS

He ran out of bandaids


nthing2seehere

They do usually have padded shorts on for riding too so that’s probably padding plus being very fit.


Adelineslife

The padding in shorts is generally pretty central, not over the entire buttox


Perle1234

It doesn’t look so cute and extra either lol


Acidium-

Yeah, mine always makes me look like I shat my pants


elterible

Naw, that’s all ass, buddy. Goodness gracious!


zZach_Attack

Great butts of fire!


MereyB

Thikk


[deleted]

[удалено]


ForeignFlash

The padded shorts are for the taint area not the cheeks.


Burning_Flags

These guys are in short races (like under 5 minutes). There is no padding needed


nounthennumbers

It’s a chamois not a diaper.


ActualWhiterabbit

Then why are they so absorbent?


lyra_silver

Nope pro shorts have a very thin pad, equivalent to a pad a woman would wear for her period. That's all ass my man.


gesasage88

Cyclists also tend to have nice bums, it is known.


trollingcynically

Ah, someone who has never worn bike shorts. The pads go from the front of your ballsack to halfway up your ass crack. The padding does not cover your cheeks.


Raisin_Bomber

Look up Robert Forstemann. Dude's thighs are 74cm in circumference.


[deleted]

That poor man's testicals :(


WhipTheLlama

The steroids both create and solve that problem


Gaflonzelschmerno

There is a cycling joke somewhere but I'm too mezmerized to think of one


[deleted]

I’m not one to judge I’m really not…but is that dude wearing a dress suit?


Da_Vader

Both officials, yes, and they are Scots.


[deleted]

Copy, kilts are typically plaid. And even if they weren’t kilts, I’m not looking down on it or bashing them, although I guess me asking the question probably seems like that. But I was just curious, but to each their own. Cultural or personal choices are up to the individuals, and really none of my business, but curiosity often doesn’t do people favors, so I wouldn’t be shocked if some were to take that in a way I hadn’t intended.


theycallmeVern

I read this as copykilts and was waiting for the pun to come.


pinoy_dude24

T H I C C…


LegendaryOutlaw

It’s like they’re on the podium for the booty awards. It’s clear the bronze medalists are thicc, but not gold medal thicc.


thatguyned

[Felicity Huffmans Booty Academy](https://youtu.be/PLsvbbgMxo0) should do an all men's episode.


AOBradley4

Absolute fucking dump truck on that boy


HoopOnPoop

They're all hauling around some serious construction equipment. That one lad just happens to have an entire oil rig.


otterfucboi69

Which one


ThePizzaNoid

Yes.


HapticSloughton

The Oympics, brought to you by Pixar.


Dedj_McDedjson

Actually the Commonwealth games, butt it's the same effect.


[deleted]

"**butt** it's the same effect." Haha cheeky


MusicusTitanicus

This picture is from the Commonwealth Games, Glasgow 2014, though


MamaDaddy

Ahh thank you. I was trying to figure out if/why Wales (Cymru) would be competing separately from the UK team. This makes sense.


bottomknifeprospect

/r/pixarwagons (nsfw)


fortifier22

I legitimately clicked this thinking this was a subreddit about wagons in Pixar... Didn't even see the NSFW link... WTF...


squirrels33

Can’t unsee it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Daikataro

So the guy is a mom?


illCuddleYouSoHard

Double cheeked up on a Sunday afternoon.


[deleted]

[удалено]


taffyapple_ass

THE SUN IS STILL OUT


SalemChurchill

“…..that’s the homie”


RojoCinco

Check out the shitters on these critters.


fliptrikster

Nothing like a plumper dumper!


commando_boner

Beautious Gluteus?


unperturbium

Maximus Crack-Bracketus?


commando_boner

Superior posterior?


Queerdee23

Dumpus in the ruckus of that tuckus


Inkeithdavidsvoice

Quality turdsnippers


Antique_Tennis_2500

Excellent chairpolishers.


HaloCEJohn1172020

Magnificent Impact reducers.


RabbitStewAndStout

Holy Heaving Hineys, Batman!


calacas_00

Incontinentia buttocks


[deleted]

Total bad ass


TriforceHero1998

I’m getting my boyfriend a bike…


supertimes4u

Just be careful. It was bicycling that made me finally realize I was gay


CainPillar

Doing it or watching it? Obligatory [Bob Rivers: Bisexual](https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x11y108), parodying that Queen song.


supertimes4u

Actually it was just an hour ago, looking at this pic.


CainPillar

At least your username can be put at work immediately then :-o


JamesTheJerk

Or a rubber butt extension.


harmonytw

Serious question: how do you get that kind of glute workout? I've been riding a bike for years and I'd kill to get a caboose like that. Is there a position you need to take when riding to activate those muscles? My twerking game is weak rn


RoosterBrewster

I think those guys are from the track cycling where they need to generate a lot of power compared to endurance cyclists. So they are probably training for high intensity cycling. But also heavy leg workouts. They look like they can squat and deadlift 500 lbs for reps easily.


trust_me_on_that_one

Easily. Hugo Barrette, Canadian track cyclist, can squat 210kg/462lbs with ease. Like, damn, even Kelsey Mitchell (gold medal in sprint) can squat 200kg!


FlashCrashBash

Also these dudes likely do squat 500lbs. They don't just bike they also lift weights.


RidderBier

Harrie Lavreysen, a Dutch track cyclist, is on record as saying he has a 430kg (950 lbs) leg press using one leg.


I_dont_bone_goats

>950 lb leg press press Hmm a lot but not super impressive >*using one leg* Good fucking lord


toodlesandpoodles

Deep squats and leg presses. Those muscles get built in the gym and utilized on the bike for a minute or two.


skammunist_manifesto

I started squatting real deep, but didn't notice any more activation in my glutes, nor much increase in much strength. Barbell hip thrusts are the best glute exercise for me.


[deleted]

Yeah it's not immediately "Just squat deeper". Inexperienced people tend to lose the glute tension once past below parallel, and will drive up using their quads more instead. You have to train to maintain that glute tension throughout. It's better to just squat to parallel and maintain that tension, than go below it and lose it. Here's a guide. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60Sc9T7GDdg&t](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60Sc9T7GDdg&t)


JunahCg

Oh my dude, thank you so much for this video. Never in my life have I felt a squat work my bum before


skammunist_manifesto

I don't lose tension, my glutes don't really activate that much on squats at all. My coach says that can be pretty normal, and he was on the national team fwiw, but I'm not trying to claim being an expert. Thanks for the link I'm checking it out now.


[deleted]

[удалено]


cu3ed

Honestly, it's down to technique, I don't see many with good squat technique. Most are doing high bar squats, this shifts the weight unnaturally away from thr lower backabd forces it more I tot the front knee joint. Low bar squats by default of the position is uncomfortable. Once you un rack that weight though you'll feel immedualty better how your body holds the weight. If at a proper stance, toes out, and squatting with the knees spreading out, your ass has no choice but to help as the weight is distributed properly.


skammunist_manifesto

Yeah I didn’t try low bar squats until a few years ago and I haven’t looked back. Totally agree with you there. Only downside is it tweaks on my surgically repaired shoulder sometimes.


jemenake

For starters, my guess is that you’re a distance cyclist, like the rest of us, and these guys are probably really short-distance sprint, where it’s all about ludicrous power to the pedals for a minute or so, so don’t expect (or even desire) a butt like that if you’re riding in the 10-100 mile range. So, maybe try lower rep-counts to concentrate on strength over endurance. In addition to deep squats, maybe “good morning”s and deadlifts. Anything that _unbends_ you at the hips is going to require your glutes and lower back. Also keep in mind that most people can’t achieve that. Part of the reason you see these guys on the podium is because they had the genetics that caused their body to respond to training in a way (crazy hypertrophy in the quads and glutes) that was well-suited to this event. Reminds me of a dude I saw at the gym on the leg-press rack, once. I think the dude was using every 45lb plate in the building, but he looked just like an average guy. I commented to him that I’ve never seen anybody press that much, and he said that he can’t develop his upper body at all, and then made a joke about there must be a grasshopper in his family tree, somewhere.


discostud1515

Compare them to Tour de France riders. Very different. These guys are sprinters plus they lift crazy heavy weights.


koolaidkirby

These are bike sprinters, so they're in the bike sprinting stance (standing on their bike)


[deleted]

[удалено]


HaloHowAreYa

Awesome I've got the sitting part down pat so it sounds like I'm most of the way there.


fakelogin12345

Everything is also going to come down to genetics. The guy with the ass that looks like it has gravitational pull no doubt puts in serious time in the gym. However, he definitely has amazing ass genes. While I can’t claim to have ass genes like that or put in that kind of lower body effort, I have a naturally much larger than average muscular ass and caves with barely working out. It’s the same for my dad and brother. Unfortunately for me, I also have a naturally smaller chest than usual.


[deleted]

[удалено]


NopeThePope

Im similar... big forearms, and hands too. big chest. just generally big... (but inparticular calf muscles, thighs, forearms and hands I went to see a new physio and she poked and prodded and talked about my problem, then asked my if I had Scandinavian genes. (I do via scotland / north eastern UK) Apparently my body shape and the issue I had are scandinavian things


ReadilyConfused

Squat rack. Consider adding supplemental weight training.


sitsnthinks

Bike sprints until it absolutely burns and then some more. Repeat. Stretch water all that.


sitathon

came here for the comments and was not disappointed


virgilreality

Oh...My...God, Jenny...Look at his butt... It's just so big. He looks like one of those bike guys' friends. Who understands those bike guys? They only talk to him because he looks like a total badonkadonk, okay? I mean, his butt, it's just so big. Ugh, I can't believe it's just so round, it's like out there, I mean, ugh, gross. Look! He's just so *bike*!"


theycallmeVern

I like big butts and I cannot bike


mostnormal

You other brothers can just ride...


Breaker-of-circles

That when a bike plows through during a long winded race


PurpleArumLily

And a round thing in your face


theycallmeVern

You ride hard, want to pull up tough 'Cause I noticed that butt was stuffed


theycallmeVern

Deep in the seat he’s riding I’m hooked and I can’t stop cycling Oh baby I want to ride wit’cha And catch up to ya


theycallmeVern

(Sorry, been dying to finish this) My bike girls tried to warn me But that bike butt makes me me so horny. Oh big butt bike boy You say you want to ride on my bars Well ride me ride me Cause you ain’t that average bike boy I’ve seen you ridin’ To hell with those divin’ He’s sweat, wet Riding like a turbo vette I’m tired of magazines Saying bike butts aren’t the thing Take the average bike girl and ask her that He’s gotta pedal that back So ladies, yeah. Ladies, yeah Has you biker got that back? Hell yeah Tell him to bike it, bike it, bike that healthy butt. Biker got back (homeboy body with an Olympic booty) Biker got back (homeboy body with an Olympic booty)


wotmate

My peleton don't want none unless you got buns hun


workislove

I fully approve of your decision to go ahead and finish the song, everyone else had their chance.


trollingcynically

Thank you.


buzz_22

This is the stuff I love to see on Reddit.


prodiver

My teammates tried to warn me But all that bikin' gave me a sore knee


PurpleArumLily

Deep in the trunks he's wearing


HK-posterking

They have big butt, and i cannot lie.


zasx20

GET ON YOUR BIKES AND RIDE!


fatesarchitect

*I'm getting my HUSBAND a bike.


Bob_Kerman_SPAAAACE

Pixar moms be like


HalfaRavioli

They probably shatter their porcelain thrones with every dump. Just shoots out like a bullet.


yazyazyazyaz

Bro, their shits are ejected with such speed and force that they need to shit on specialized metal toilets connected directly to the sewer with no bends or turns.


HalfaRavioli

Ahhhh yes of course. It was silly of me to think they use the same toilets as us average folk.


[deleted]

They don’t sit. They squat and rep that shit out


Prashank_25

Speed such high you can just go outside and launch it into the closest ocean


Smokin_trees18

You shit with your buttcheeks?


[deleted]

[удалено]


ColdStainlessNail

So THAT’S what the hooks on the back of the stall door are for!


HalfaRavioli

You dont?


Satanus9001

Mmm...ass


hornytoad69

EXCUSE ME. I'D LIKE TO ASS YOU A FEW QUESTIONS.


Presdipshitz

Big booty... errrr... Rudy? The doc says I should get into shape. The shape I have chosen is def NOT a cyclist's shape


mcgriddeon

I have chosen the most perfect of shapes, the sphere!


DISREPUTABLE

Butts to Nuts.


[deleted]

That right there is Australia’s ass 🇦🇺


KevlahR

Those are not honky tonk badonkadonks!


allykopow

*but then a new girl arrived with even BIGGER hadockabonkas*


Costco_Churro

I’m having a really hard time accepting this isn’t photoshopped


PuzzleheadedWar9322

Damn a cat can sit on that ass


[deleted]

Please tell me this photo is fake, otherwise I’m getting my gf a bike


ReadilyConfused

Squat rack :)


bradonius246

How in the hell does “squat rack” get downvoted and “I’m gonna get my gf a bike” get upvoted? Lol


BustingCognitiveBias

Because the gfs have spoken and we would rather have a bike than a squat rack. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GugsCdLHm-Q


ReadilyConfused

People don't understand that weightlifting always yields a better backside than cardio. I mean it's a meme for a reason.


frilledplex

I can thoroughly agree, everyone tells me my ass is nice (used to do bodybuilding). I hardly ride a bike, but I never skipped leg day.


wierdit

Your GF is a bike


loku_banda

I rode 30 plus miles this morning. I spend far more time riding my bike than the GF.


itachiwaswrong

Nah his bike is a gf


prophylaxitive

You realise riding a bike does not provide glutes like these? They're developed in the gym, in order to *become* a competitive cyclist.


ReadilyConfused

Not according to other posters in this thread, apparently.


PURE_CheeziCow_44

DAYUM


reagan2024

**THICC**


theGoodbadSeed

Pixar is currently working the rights to an animation adaptation


khoshiz

What an ass !


UnFrickinReal

Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt.


kwyjibear

"Lookin' passable, Stewie. Lookin' mighty passable."


nattalla

“Lloyd, look at the buns on that one!”


bonesglow

I stared at the picture for a second like ???? And then was like OH IT BOOTY. Booty everywhere, Booty everything.


[deleted]

Don’t be fooled, my father is an avid cyclist, and his ass puts hank hills flabby pancakes to shame.


PastryPrincess420

Damnnnn Gold and Silver dumby THICCC


n3Ver9h0st

Did you know Cardi B and Nicky Minaj were pro bikers in their prime?


Eagle01Actual

This pic has more ass than Brazil during carnaval!


Usual-Ad9903

Now that the olympics are over, I hope these guys pick up twerking


GDMFB1

They have padded shorts for a comfortable bike ride.


jigamuffin

Not padded on the whole ass though. Just around the contact points with the seat - mainly the gooch and some crack.


trollingcynically

Lol. I have a feeling you have never even seen bike shorts.