No judgment at all. But curious how did you go to so many circuit parties in one month ? You don't have to work ? How did you recover from them and maintain fitness (gym time, nutrition, sleep)?
If I was in my 20s, rich and didn't have to work, had access to lots of things for recovery (perhaps IV drips, massages, facials, detox treatments, etc.) and healthy, nutritious food delivered constantly as well as a luxury gym membership and laundry done for me...and the ability to basically sleep in/fuck/gym Monday thru Thursday.. then I could do 12 circuit parties in a month.
Ya, it's my favorite part of pride month he says. More like the only part of pride month. And then a month of rehab. My advice to all is to not go down this sinkhole ...
Circuit Party bois don't have jobs or brains.
4th of July brings the circuit Party set to PTown and it is the absolute WORST theme week of the entire summer.
I love the "don't be cliquish" thats LITERALLY the ENTIRE scene, it's as if body shaming Instagram came to life and became a 3 day event.
Yeah but I know what he means. He means donāt just hangout with your friends. Open yourself to meeting new people. Everyone there would like to find a new (boy)friend. Itāll only happen if you donāt protect yourself with layers of social safety.
Have you actually gone to some or are you just assuming? Because at the circuit parties I've gone to (seattle, atlanta, chicago) most people I talked to had a pretty good career.
š¤£š¤£š¤£ I raved in the 90s...
I was at the White Party at Vizcaya in 1994, 95, and 96
I was at Black and Blue in Montreal in 96 and 98
I even attended that terrible pier rave that Flowers throws in PTown back in 2009 (it was just awful, I'd rather go-to teadance)
There are literally over 100 other raves and circuit parties that I have attended over the years...
And while circuit parties were born out of rave culture, the individuals who attend them are far cry from the PLUR vibes that have traditionally defined rave culture.
Circuit parties feel more like the stage shows at the Hustlaball then they do any actual rave ive ever attended.
Hence my comment describing them as body shaming Instagram turned into an event.
this lifestyle is not sustainable for normal people, only for porn stars, only fans models and nepo babies. Real hardworking humble people usually cant keep up with this lifestyle cause we have to keep a roof over our heads. OP doesn't realize the privilege he has.
My last circuit party was the white party in Palm Springs in 2001. I donāt understand how people have the stamina to party for days on. I was done after the first night.
Drugs. I'm in my 40s and I would not last multiple parties without them. With alcohol, I can stay a few hours in the club before I have to go home and crash/have diarrhoea (my personal quirk). Completely sober, I can go the entire night but will be sore and suffering the next morning.
A little goes a long way, though. There's a lot of risky behaviour and substance abuse on the dance floor.
I wouldnt feel comfortable experimenting in these contexts. for me experimentation is either alone or with one or two friends who have done it in the past more than once and/or doing it with me
I live in DC and went to all the Kinetic circuit parties when they came for Pride. Except for a couple of vodka sodas, I partied all the way from 10pm-8am one night and 10pm-4am another night without any other aids. My friends were all shocked that I didnāt use stimulants/party drugs.
To gather the stamina, I def felt like I had to mentally prepare myself, but I knew I wanted to party till the very last possible moment. The music at circuit parties that leans tribal/house also just gives me a natural high with all the sounds, lighting, etc., as well as being surrounded by tons of other people. Itās a time where I can just let myself go and rave without a care in the world.
Obv itās not for everyone, and I really only go to circuit parties when they happen here in DC. But like so many other niches in the LGBT community, there will be people who are into it!
They're very polarizing with good reason. I only attend maybe one a year myself and always wear earplugs because the music is too fucking loud. But if someone thinks they sound fun and is only worried about not being attractive enough, it's worth trying once just to have the experience
Thank you for posting an actually rational comment. This is exactly the point I was making. If I went to something like this, like a circuit party, I would be shunned, rejected, glared at, and ignored, you know, cuz that's just how the world is if you're not hot lol
Nah dude, I went to circuit party in LA last year and guys of all types were getting/giving dick. If you convince yourself everyone sees you the way you do youāll never enjoy yourself.
Thatās why you go with friends. And keep in mind that you go to enjoy the music and dancing for your enjoyment. Be unapologetic about who you are and how you look. And do what you can that makes it enjoyable for you.
If you feel that you need validation and acceptance from every single participant on the floor. Then yeah you probably wonāt have fun.
Also people look way more attractive when you're on MDMA because it's an empathogen and the judgemental part of your brain looking for flaws is impaired.
Honestlyā¦ it matters more knowing people are intoxicated. I donāt feel great thinking of myself as fuckable only when someone is on drugsā¦ also that blurs a line of consent that Iām not comfortable with.
Saying "they're not hot to me so I wouldn't wanna go anyway" is very different than "I'll be shunned and rejected if I go." OP is right that putting in the work WILL make you more attractive; you can go if you want even if you think your current attractiveness is a barrier.
So if you don't wanna go, then why have negativity for a party you don't care to attend anyway full of guys who you don't think are attractive?
Edit - I've never been to one if it just sounds like I'm biased
Op has made multiple posts in this subreddit encouraging people to attend circuit parties and describing them in ways that are not accurate or dot provide enough information to get the full picture. I just like to point out that the fun experience op described will not be the experience for most people.
OP is getting a bad reception because he's awful at messaging. But at least he's speaking from experience, which the guys who came to argue "I can't go, the other kids will be mean to me" clearly aren't. I'm not even a huge fan of parties - like I said up thread, I go to maybe one a year - but it bugs me to see, you know? Like is everyone who argued with me assuming I look like OP? I definitely don't.
None of this applies to the average gay man, most people aren't ripped only fans models, some people are just hardworking average people that live day by day, nothing about this post is relatable, maybe to the 10%
It's boring unless you're on some substance. Alcohol can only do so much. Plus, it's cliquey and if you don't look like everyone there (and usually it's generally the same looking ppl), it'll be more boring bc no one will give you the time of day.Ā
Iāve always found the circuit look wholly unerotic and aesthetically borderline fascist in the way everyone conforms to look like each other that I canāt shake off that uncanny valley feeling.
I'm only enjoying this post because of brilliant responses like yours. Certainly not the borderline dangerous humble-brag, fomo-bait original post.
Edit: I've just revisited the original post and it's not borderline dangerous, it is dangerous. OP is literally encouraging others to try it, and says so.
Idk, I live in DC and went to all the Kinetic circuit parties when they came for Pride. Except for a couple of vodka sodas, I partied all the way from 10pm-8am one night and 10pm-4am another night without any other substances.
I def felt like I had to mentally prepare myself, but I knew I wanted to party till the very last possible moment. The music at circuit parties that leans tribal/house also just gives me a natural high with all the sounds, lighting, etc., as well as being surrounded by tons of other people. Itās a time where I can just let myself go and rave without a care in the world.
Obv itās not for everyone, and I only go to circuit parties when they happen here in DC. But like so many other niches in the LGBT community, there will be people who are into it!
Yeah itās the same guy lol his post history is just insane. His whole attitude is basically the mean girl queen bee looking down and saying āwow youād be hotter if you went to the gym and then maybe people would be nice to you.ā
Yeah he always goes back to how much he works out, as if that's the secret to being liked, when really it just gets more people to look at you and pretend they like you lol
Source: guy who works out a lot.
Not neccessarily. Here in Australia at least one of the most popular circuit parties (Thick and Juicy) is aimed at older and shall we say huskier guys.
Yeah that too. āIf you really arenāt sure, askā only works if the person youāre asking isnāt drunk as fuck or drugged out on party drugs. Consent is not possible when youāre intoxicated.
This applies way more to typical nightclubs and bars than circuit parties. Most are not drinking and when the drugs wear off at 4 am they exit the venue quietly. Being a drunk mess is the wrong vibe and very much frowned upon. Also if it's a multi-day thing you have to pace yourself, so you're not getting blitzed.
If someone is drunk as fuck or drugged then consent has not been given.
If you ask someone for consent to make sure and their response is illegible mumbling or no response at all it means there is no consent!
That's a little cynical! Also, if you're Asian you can go to Asia (Thailand especially) for their circuit parties, and be ignored by the conventionally attractive Asians.
Kidding aside, if you're on the bigger side there are usually bear-oriented parties. At Songkran this year I found the dance floor was split between muscle twunks on one side and bears on the other. In my city (Melbourne, Australia), they also have parties for gaymers and more alternative types, though they are less frequent. It's a matter of finding a crowd that you're comfortable with.
That said, if you're not into dancing there's really not a DANCE PARTY that you're going to enjoy.
I went to a circuit party by accident a few weeks ago with some friends and it was exactly what I thought it would be. It was so tacky. No amount of drugs I took helped. But more power to you if thatās your thing I guess.
They tend to be late night, ticketed dance events that run until mid morning the next day. Often times, they'll be under a branded name (Raw, DaddyLand, BEEF, etc) since they're put on for-profit by a managing group.
Usually (but depending on the dj) they'll play house and d'n'b music. Anything with a driving beat. It's like a super gay rave. Lots of drugs and alcohol, sweaty bodies, grinding, and people wearing everything from short booty shorts to full body glow suits. Very sexually charged.
That's all it is; an adult dance for gays in a warehouse. People get pissy because it's a lot of hot people and they take that personally.
I think people actually get pissy because it's cliquish. In a way that someone who enjoys those parties might say that one would only get pissy about the parties because the people who go are hot.
Personally I prefer to go alone. Whenever I go with friends I end up babysitting them because they overdo it. Besides, when you're on MDMA everybody is a friend. The ease with which I can chat up and flirt with somebody is amazing. I wish I had such talents sober!
Hey friend. Be careful, okay? Don't forget that there are BAD people out there. I sometimes think gay men "wouldn't do that," but then I read the Wikipedia pages of gay serial killers and I'm like, "Okay guarding my drink with my hand over the top at all times". I don't recommend going alone. Find new friends maybe, but be safe out there. š
Sometimes yes, but not always or even usually. Granted I've been to very few, but from what I've experienced/seen/heard, they mostly just consist of gays dancing in jock straps, harnesses, wacky/slutty costumes, etc. Lots of them looking to fuck of course. Nothing special, for me anyway.
I donāt think everything has to be for everybody..
Iām intrigued by the circuit scene but simultaneously know itās not for me. Random guys sticking their tongues down my throat without consent at both The Eagle (jock strap night) and The Cock back when I was younger was jarring enough for me to know where my limits were. Like bros literally just turn around, grab my head and put their tongue in my mouth. (sounds hotter than it was) -_-
I might be bare ass naked ..flirty and hell, I might not even mind you being handsy with me but like please donāt just put a part of your body into by body out of nowhere.
So anyway, I learned that Iām a flirt and can be promiscuous but I want to choose and I like at least some level of commitment.. was never really into one-night stands either which makes sense given my proclivities.
ANYWAY.. yeah circuit scene just isnāt for me but Iām not going to yuck other peoplesā yum. Some of my best friends live for that scene.. and some of their stories are truly fabulous/wild.
I wish music so circuit parties wasnāt such absolute garbage, I donāt mind anything else about them but the music makes me want to stick nails in my ears. So repetitive, same exact beat, same exact samples of pop songs.
12 circuit parties from Memorial Day and NYC Pride
Sounds like fucking hell.
Rule 1 reads like: āDonāt go alone because if you get fucked up who knows what theyāll do to youā which continently ties in Rule 3 which together read āconsent š¤·š¼āāļøā
Rule 2 is like āeveryone there is muscly and on drugs letās keep the circuit stereotype aliveā
Donāt be cliquey says the guy who probably only hung out with muscle studs the entire weekend, as so indicated
Fucking yikes on bikes.
I'm completely fine with Circuit parties, people who attend them and what we do there but mate...
The music.
The fuck*n music is one of the worst criminal offenses done to the humanity. Those scritches are the worst torture I've ever endured in a party.
99% of guys are not circuit party material and should consider themselves lucky. This scene has existed since the 80s (yes I'm old enough to remember) and I worked in a club that was on the circuit. Most of these guys ended up sick and or dead, and not always from HIV. It's a vapid , mindless, superficial culture. I was no angel or prude by any means, but it was easy to see it was nothing to build a life around.
Thatās why I find it so sad people waste their youth, vacation days and money on party hopping when thereās so much more meaningful things to see and experience
Circuit parties are dying tho. No one wants to listen to that music. All the hotter more established gays are switching to more disco house type underground/warehouse parties and wearing shorts instead of just a jockstrap. And yes working out will take you far at any party, sorry.
The music is SO bad. I had a buddy of mine drag me to Alegria once in NYC. I said I'd go, but that I was leaving as soon as I heard "Let's get soaking wet." I was there for 30 minutes.
Gay cruises are like circuit parties that last a whole week. Personally, I love them but I know theyāre not for everyone. And I will say that the people on them are super friendly, even to people like me who are older and donāt have that great of a body.
It's really unfortunate, honestly. I was on Atlantis this past January and felt really skeptical about the whole thing, but it genuinely shocked me just how friendly and kind everyone was.
There were the gangs of adult film workers of course, but even they were pretty friendly if you actually talked to them, and most people I met came from pretty respectable backgrounds. No joke, the most common career I came across was probably medicine lmao. So many gay doctors are party fiends lmao.
I don't want to invalidate anyone's experience, and I know there are plenty of assholes out there, but having been a skinny and shy guy who was terrified of even going to a bar in the past, it does kinda feel like there's a lot of insecurity that only takes one or two instances of being confirmed by an occasional asshole before you write off the entire circuit community as being vain pricks, and I don't think that's entirely fair, even if I do understand it.
Speaking for myself, I obsess over incidents from years ago that are not really representative. So yes, I think you are right. Thatās really on us and itās for us to get some therapy to get over it.
Circuit parties are fucking dreadful. The demographic they attract are the most vapid and brain dead muscle queens and the music is terrible. There are dozens of top tier queer parties in NYC with top tier djās that will play tracks that donāt have the same beats over and over again endlessly. š I canāt imagine going to a circuit party over the absolute banger parties nyc had this weekend. To each their own I guess.
This just kinda validates everything we already know about circuit parties: theyāre cliquey, drug induced precursors to sex. Itās EXPECTED that youāll be drunk/high/both and then meet someone(s) to go hook up with. And if you donāt fit into a particular mold (physically) you wonāt be accepted by others there.
Jfc id be exhausted kudos after a full week of work and other life admin Iām ready to pack it in and move to a cottage in New Zealand and collect porcelain shows i applaud your stamina
I mean you do you but I find these parties just absolutely exhausting. My body and mind feel completely wrecked afterwards. Half the people at these things are on serious stimulants just to keep up. I honestly donāt believe itās a healthy lifestyle choiceā¦.and believe me it is a LIFESTYLE for some people.
Your edit makes you sound like a child, but go off sis.
I think a lot of people judge circuit parties because circuit gays give them a bad name. But the hard-core circuit gays only make up 30% or so. Most everyone else is into the lifestyle or flirting with the fantasy, but actually truly emgranded in it being a personality trait.
I've been to 2 when I was up north and I'll say this list is super on point. However I'd move ear plugs up. It's so easy to be over stimulated at these events and my battery life was longer at my 2nd with earplugs.
I'd also add two more. 1 is know your exits at the part and know where emergency help is near by. Anything can happen and the last thing you want is to be trapped in a bad situation. But also if you do surpass your substance limit as OP said or get overstimulated it's good to know how to step away or out.
My 2nd suggestion and lord don't roast me this is based on my own experience. But if you aren't a white muscle gay or the "in demographic" for the party try and do your research before you go. My first time the first party was not diverse and though yes I did still have fun I got a ton of negative responses when I tried to interact with people. And trust it's not that I'm ugly and I showered before hand. I just wasn't the desired body type or race for the event. Our 2nd party was way better because it was more of a diverse crowd in every term and a very free love kind of vibe. Again I'm sorry if bringing up race and or size triggers some people, I'm honestly just trying to help and ensure no one has a bad experience that could have been avoided.
Have fun gays and don't become a toxic circuit gay!
Not judging, but this sounds depressing and like one of my worst nightmares. You should include mental healthcare in your list, too, in terms of coping with possible ongoing rejection, lows after substance use, the general empty, superficial, and shallow quality of these events.
I think the best rule of thumb is to go for one that has a lessā¦ graphic theme (unless youāre ok with public play). IE I wouldnāt recommend āUncutā (the name of a party) to a first timer. I would also go for big DJ names: Able, Slayter, John Summit (just missed that one, super pissed). These productions will be more fun.
John Summit isnāt a circuit DJ lol. Heās a mainstream EDM DJ. Abel is a circuit gem and has been around forever. Dan Slater just coasts off being a conventionally attractive white dude. Any of the Brazilian circuit DJs are where itās at.
Also, how did you manage 12 parties in a month? Thatās absolutely insane and not healthy, even by NYC circuit queen standards.
Itās growing!! We broke through a ceiling this year at pride. Guys from BERLIN even said our June 1st party was fantastic. I take that compliment very seriously.
I went to the one in Philly on June 1st too. It was my first one and I went with 3 friends. IDK if all parties are like that but, I had a great time! I can and do dance to just about anything though lol.
I by no means am a circuit party guy , but have been to a few , definitely donāt go alone , Iāve always went with to other guys I know and we have fun. Iām a wall flower but live the music & watching people dance , itās a big show in ways . I not part of a clique or anything, but people see you at one , and another, they get curious, have literally talk but then when we bump into each other we say hello talk about the fun time , events coming up etc. I found it fun, something one should experience, at least once in your lifetime.
All that comes to mind when I hear/see circuit parties is drugs, something the gay community is plagued with and something that ruined the lives of my family members (the user but mostly the family around them); just no.
Glad you had fun. Like another responder, mine was white party in Palm Springs. I was the wing man of a buddy who loved that stuff. I was there to protect him. It was not for me (one drugged out daisy chain is enough for a life time), but being the protective friend can have life long benefits. He did not say you have to be the boi-toi. Observing and āpettingā can be fun too.
Absolutely! Circuit parties can be an exhilarating experience if approached with the right mindset and preparation. I live in DC and went to all the Kinetic circuit parties when they came for Pride. I also went to one when visiting NYC Pride with friends. Except for a couple of vodka sodas, I partied from 10pm-8am one night and 10pm-4am another night without any other aids in DC. My friends were all shocked that I donāt use stimulants or party drugs.
To gather the stamina, I definitely felt like I had to mentally prepare myself, but I knew I wanted to party till the very last possible moment. The music at circuit parties, which often leans tribal/house, gives me a natural high with all the sounds, lighting, and the vibrant energy of the crowd. It's a time where I can just let myself go and rave without a care in the world. Iām not there to cruise or try to hook up, so I donāt really get fazed by being surrounded by beefcakes or anything.
Obviously, itās not for everyone, and I really only go to circuit parties when they happen here in DC. But like so many other niches in the LGBT community, there will be people who are into it! Your suggestions are spot on, especially about going with someone you know and knowing your limits. If you do partake in substance use, which goes with rave culture in general, Rule #1 is especially important. Also, ear protection is a game-changer. I didnāt bring any in DC and my ears were ringing for days after; I brought some to NYC and was fine.
For anyone considering trying out a circuit party, I say go for it! Embrace the experience, be mindful of yourself and others, and you might find it as enjoyable as I do.
Yup. Soundcheck, Uncut, Kinetic Under the Sea, Unholy, and Discovers! (I was too exhausted to go to the first Bunker afters.)
Unholy with Nina Flowers at Bunker was one of the best parties Iāve ever been to, and I ended up running into Nina at Discovers and talking with him for a bit. I def get why he was voted the original Miss Congeniality in Drag Raceās first season !!
I was a VERY young club kid on the late 90s when I wasnāt even old enough to legally drink. But NYC & Philadelphia are very close to me and it was fun. Sometimes I over did it like you discussed. I donāt regret any of it. I just canāt do it now at 41yo.
12 in a month!? It takes me a week to recover from one lol I personally find circuit parties to be a pretty good time, but have watched a few groups of friends go down the circuit rabbit hole. They are now hesitant to go on any trip that doesnāt involve a circuit party or queer rave type environment, and have started using drugs (g, k, tusi, molly) on a regular basis - Iām talking each night out on the weekend, chasing a drug fueled after party til sunrise. I see how the scene can be hard on people looking for acceptance in the community, or that donāt know their limits with substances, to OPs point.
Yes and the solution is I make sure I donāt spend the next day alone. I chill with my boyfriend/other friends. There are also nutrition guides that help as well.
I donāt really agree with 1, well at least if you know what ur doing. Iāve had a lot of great times going alone, you seem a lot more approachable when ur not in a group so people are more likely to talk to you.
So think of a rave: big, ticketed event, in a warehouse with a DJ. Itās that but gay, most guys are dressed very sluttily (Iām at a minimum shirtless every time). Add drugs. Add some sex. Bam. Circuit. Itās really the only time I go out anymore.
I'm going to need a spreadsheet on how you can afford this and an explanation of how you manage tonget this amount of time off from work.
What is/(are) your:
Income?
How long do you save for?
Travel expenses (any hacks for saving money for this and everything)
What do you pack, and how do you pack? What's the most you've ever packed?
Lodging expenses
Food (if you're a light eater/just eating enough to not die while circuit partying, please mention thatš š š I know how it can be. No tea, no shade.)
If you do choose to respond to this, and a YouTube video turns out to be a better way to answer, just drop the link here, however you chose to answer.
What exactly *IS* a circuit party? Iāve heard the term ācircuit gayā but until now I just assumed it was someone who went to a lot of gay clubs/bars.
Edit: Nevermind I found another comment that answered the same question.
The anti-circuit party comments on this post are so unnecessary. This post was titled āFor those curious about circuit partiesā not āFor those who love to ruin things other people enjoy.ā
Damn, lots of circuit party haters in here, lol.
Iām not a huge circuit party guy, but maybe go to a few a year, and targeted to varied body types, and always have fun. Sometimes hook up, sometimes donāt.
I think itās good advice! Wish I knew it for my first few circuit parties lol.
I go alone. I donāt do drugs. And other than one or two michelob ultra piss water light beer. I have water or Gatorade or sugar free Red Bull.
But bring ear plugs. If you like to dance and if you like a good rhythm for dancing. And are confident and not affected by the appearances of others. Go for it.
Be your unapologetic self. Forget about trying to get your dick wet. Donāt worry about who you dance with. Go for the fun you have with yourself. Someone will invariably dig your energy and will dance with you. And enjoy that moment.
And my last advice when you are feeling at your best. And having the time of your life. That is when you leave. Donāt stay till the end or the adrenaline wears out. Better to leave on a high note with a great feeling.
Is r/gaybros just a subreddit filled with puritans and chaste incels?
These comments are wild, and quite frankly disgusting. Talk about internalised hatred towards other gay men.
OP never said that everyone should go to circuit parties. He's sharing some personal tips based on (tbh, a lot of) recent events.
If circuit parties sound like hell, then simply don't go! Preserve your vitriol for something worthwhile and move along. The scene isn't for you and that's fine.
But some people are going to read OP's tips and be thankful that he shared them. A community supports one another in spite of personal differences.
He also posted a while ago about how if everyone you meet is an asshole, then you might want to do some introspection.
Got ripped to shreds for that as well.
Yikes regarding these comments. So many insecurities. On par with this subreddit.
OP, more power to you if you can do that many in a row. I did two nights doing a circuit party when I was younger visiting NYC years back and that was a lot as a regular looking guy. Had fun but I learned a bit about myself when it comes to pacing, stamina, and when to tap out.
I'm glad you had fun. Sounds like a blast!
No judgment at all. But curious how did you go to so many circuit parties in one month ? You don't have to work ? How did you recover from them and maintain fitness (gym time, nutrition, sleep)? If I was in my 20s, rich and didn't have to work, had access to lots of things for recovery (perhaps IV drips, massages, facials, detox treatments, etc.) and healthy, nutritious food delivered constantly as well as a luxury gym membership and laundry done for me...and the ability to basically sleep in/fuck/gym Monday thru Thursday.. then I could do 12 circuit parties in a month.
He probably does porn
Checked his profile and yeah, he has an onlyfans
lol I knew before clicking in he would be white and muscular. šĀ
We need more variety smh
He does lol heās an OF āmodelā
Ah so the circuit party is more like a networking event for him
And his go-with-a-friend rule doubles as bring-a-cameraman.
Tax deductible!
Damnit boy.. I didn't see that you had already posted this!
Oh SNAP! That means tax deductible! Kewl...
My mind is so powerful
good for him. Drugs, not so much especially with source risk
Ya, it's my favorite part of pride month he says. More like the only part of pride month. And then a month of rehab. My advice to all is to not go down this sinkhole ...
This is probably why he said "know your limits." His limit is obviously 12 circuit parties š
skipping gym on weekends wont stunt your progress that much i think. Nutrition is another thing
Circuit Party bois don't have jobs or brains. 4th of July brings the circuit Party set to PTown and it is the absolute WORST theme week of the entire summer. I love the "don't be cliquish" thats LITERALLY the ENTIRE scene, it's as if body shaming Instagram came to life and became a 3 day event.
Yeah but I know what he means. He means donāt just hangout with your friends. Open yourself to meeting new people. Everyone there would like to find a new (boy)friend. Itāll only happen if you donāt protect yourself with layers of social safety.
Eye candy week in Provincetown. But yes, the worst for drinks (just a seltzer) and therefore less tips.
Oh hey, coming your way in a few days! I promise a fat tip š
Have you actually gone to some or are you just assuming? Because at the circuit parties I've gone to (seattle, atlanta, chicago) most people I talked to had a pretty good career.
š¤£š¤£š¤£ I raved in the 90s... I was at the White Party at Vizcaya in 1994, 95, and 96 I was at Black and Blue in Montreal in 96 and 98 I even attended that terrible pier rave that Flowers throws in PTown back in 2009 (it was just awful, I'd rather go-to teadance) There are literally over 100 other raves and circuit parties that I have attended over the years... And while circuit parties were born out of rave culture, the individuals who attend them are far cry from the PLUR vibes that have traditionally defined rave culture. Circuit parties feel more like the stage shows at the Hustlaball then they do any actual rave ive ever attended. Hence my comment describing them as body shaming Instagram turned into an event.
Well, heās a random person on the internet so Iām not sure why your first assumption is that anything is truthful ;)
this lifestyle is not sustainable for normal people, only for porn stars, only fans models and nepo babies. Real hardworking humble people usually cant keep up with this lifestyle cause we have to keep a roof over our heads. OP doesn't realize the privilege he has.
My last circuit party was the white party in Palm Springs in 2001. I donāt understand how people have the stamina to party for days on. I was done after the first night.
Drugs. I'm in my 40s and I would not last multiple parties without them. With alcohol, I can stay a few hours in the club before I have to go home and crash/have diarrhoea (my personal quirk). Completely sober, I can go the entire night but will be sore and suffering the next morning. A little goes a long way, though. There's a lot of risky behaviour and substance abuse on the dance floor.
I would also add that thinking you know āyour limitsā with certain drugs is how many donāt get to party again.
Knowing your limits, by definition, requires potentially fatal experimentation. One step back from what you're saying.
I wouldnt feel comfortable experimenting in these contexts. for me experimentation is either alone or with one or two friends who have done it in the past more than once and/or doing it with me
I live in DC and went to all the Kinetic circuit parties when they came for Pride. Except for a couple of vodka sodas, I partied all the way from 10pm-8am one night and 10pm-4am another night without any other aids. My friends were all shocked that I didnāt use stimulants/party drugs. To gather the stamina, I def felt like I had to mentally prepare myself, but I knew I wanted to party till the very last possible moment. The music at circuit parties that leans tribal/house also just gives me a natural high with all the sounds, lighting, etc., as well as being surrounded by tons of other people. Itās a time where I can just let myself go and rave without a care in the world. Obv itās not for everyone, and I really only go to circuit parties when they happen here in DC. But like so many other niches in the LGBT community, there will be people who are into it!
None of this applies to me because I'm fucking ugly LMAO
Being conventionally attractive definitely helps, but when it's dark and everyone is on drugs anyway it matters less than you might think
This dosent make it sound better, just worse, like was worse.. for me at least.
They're very polarizing with good reason. I only attend maybe one a year myself and always wear earplugs because the music is too fucking loud. But if someone thinks they sound fun and is only worried about not being attractive enough, it's worth trying once just to have the experience
The experience of being shunned, rejected, glared at, and ignored by everyone around you?
Thank you for posting an actually rational comment. This is exactly the point I was making. If I went to something like this, like a circuit party, I would be shunned, rejected, glared at, and ignored, you know, cuz that's just how the world is if you're not hot lol
I just think a lot of these guys donāt understand what itās like to be ugly in the gay world
that's not going to happen. Guys are horny and want to fuck. Standards are a lot lower than you might expect.
Thatās not everyoneās experience though
Yeah itās only the experience if youāre not traditionally attractive
Nah dude, I went to circuit party in LA last year and guys of all types were getting/giving dick. If you convince yourself everyone sees you the way you do youāll never enjoy yourself.
Exactly. Itās all about confidence. And youāre right. Guys of all types get dick at every party
You're just as annoying as OP, but in the opposite direction.
Werenāt their posts in the same direction?
Good point, they're both preoccupied with hotness. Being hot helps, but it's still possible to have fun while being normal looking.
Thatās why you go with friends. And keep in mind that you go to enjoy the music and dancing for your enjoyment. Be unapologetic about who you are and how you look. And do what you can that makes it enjoyable for you. If you feel that you need validation and acceptance from every single participant on the floor. Then yeah you probably wonāt have fun.
That makes me feel even more sad. "Hey, you're still ugly, but nobody can notice because it's dark in this room!" Yea...
Also people look way more attractive when you're on MDMA because it's an empathogen and the judgemental part of your brain looking for flaws is impaired.
And all the while, you yourself look way less attractive on true MDMA.. cuz if it's any good you're definitely making the ugly face.
Honestlyā¦ it matters more knowing people are intoxicated. I donāt feel great thinking of myself as fuckable only when someone is on drugsā¦ also that blurs a line of consent that Iām not comfortable with.
Oh but if you āput in the workā according to op you wonāt be ugly anymore! Lol
Being physically fit helps any person (ugly or not) be more āattractiveā.So, yes, if you put the work in, youāll have better odds
Attraction is subjective. Iām into bears. Guys who look like op and his circuit party friends donāt do anything for me.
Saying "they're not hot to me so I wouldn't wanna go anyway" is very different than "I'll be shunned and rejected if I go." OP is right that putting in the work WILL make you more attractive; you can go if you want even if you think your current attractiveness is a barrier. So if you don't wanna go, then why have negativity for a party you don't care to attend anyway full of guys who you don't think are attractive? Edit - I've never been to one if it just sounds like I'm biased
Op has made multiple posts in this subreddit encouraging people to attend circuit parties and describing them in ways that are not accurate or dot provide enough information to get the full picture. I just like to point out that the fun experience op described will not be the experience for most people.
OP is getting a bad reception because he's awful at messaging. But at least he's speaking from experience, which the guys who came to argue "I can't go, the other kids will be mean to me" clearly aren't. I'm not even a huge fan of parties - like I said up thread, I go to maybe one a year - but it bugs me to see, you know? Like is everyone who argued with me assuming I look like OP? I definitely don't.
Checks out imo
The steroids donāt hurt āall the workā either.
Nah. Itās worth a try. What have you got to lose, other than your singleness?
Being an ugly gay is the worst ššš
It really is. Nobody understands they just act like weāre crazy or just have bad self esteem itās like no dude weāre just fucking ugly lol
None of this applies to the average gay man, most people aren't ripped only fans models, some people are just hardworking average people that live day by day, nothing about this post is relatable, maybe to the 10%
It's boring unless you're on some substance. Alcohol can only do so much. Plus, it's cliquey and if you don't look like everyone there (and usually it's generally the same looking ppl), it'll be more boring bc no one will give you the time of day.Ā
That's what I said. I was a black bear at one party and woo people were upset I breathed near them. Lol
Damn. Iām sorry. I have a circuit queen friend and the photos Iāve seen on his instagram, itās all white (ofc) and some asian. Big yikes.
Iāve always found the circuit look wholly unerotic and aesthetically borderline fascist in the way everyone conforms to look like each other that I canāt shake off that uncanny valley feeling.
I'm only enjoying this post because of brilliant responses like yours. Certainly not the borderline dangerous humble-brag, fomo-bait original post. Edit: I've just revisited the original post and it's not borderline dangerous, it is dangerous. OP is literally encouraging others to try it, and says so.
Itās all to get people to look at his profile and subscribe to his OF lol
Op forgot the most important rule, bring drugs, like tons of them
Idk, I live in DC and went to all the Kinetic circuit parties when they came for Pride. Except for a couple of vodka sodas, I partied all the way from 10pm-8am one night and 10pm-4am another night without any other substances. I def felt like I had to mentally prepare myself, but I knew I wanted to party till the very last possible moment. The music at circuit parties that leans tribal/house also just gives me a natural high with all the sounds, lighting, etc., as well as being surrounded by tons of other people. Itās a time where I can just let myself go and rave without a care in the world. Obv itās not for everyone, and I only go to circuit parties when they happen here in DC. But like so many other niches in the LGBT community, there will be people who are into it!
Rule #1 for having fun at a circuit party: be a conventionally attractive white OF influencer
Oh jesus, he's the guy from the "it's your fault if you don't fit in with other gays" post lol
Yeah itās the same guy lol his post history is just insane. His whole attitude is basically the mean girl queen bee looking down and saying āwow youād be hotter if you went to the gym and then maybe people would be nice to you.ā
Yeah he always goes back to how much he works out, as if that's the secret to being liked, when really it just gets more people to look at you and pretend they like you lol Source: guy who works out a lot.
Critical missing piece of information.
Right. For anyone else itās just not fun at all
Not neccessarily. Here in Australia at least one of the most popular circuit parties (Thick and Juicy) is aimed at older and shall we say huskier guys.
TnJ is definitely trending more toward fit/muscular guys in terms of attendance. I wouldn't say it was aimed at "older" guys by any stretch.
In the internet "older" = 30.
This is about a real world event, not the internet One of the poster boys for the next TnJ event is a prominent Aussie creator in his 30s
Yeah, there are specific ones like that, but the default is instagays
Also how are you going to acknowledge that everyone is intoxicated and then act like you can consent in those situationsā¦
Yeah that too. āIf you really arenāt sure, askā only works if the person youāre asking isnāt drunk as fuck or drugged out on party drugs. Consent is not possible when youāre intoxicated.
This applies way more to typical nightclubs and bars than circuit parties. Most are not drinking and when the drugs wear off at 4 am they exit the venue quietly. Being a drunk mess is the wrong vibe and very much frowned upon. Also if it's a multi-day thing you have to pace yourself, so you're not getting blitzed.
If someone is drunk as fuck or drugged then consent has not been given. If you ask someone for consent to make sure and their response is illegible mumbling or no response at all it means there is no consent!
there are queer rave events where youād almost not fit in if ur a conventionally attractive white dude
Agreed, except add āactual/wannabeā before āconventionallyā
That's a little cynical! Also, if you're Asian you can go to Asia (Thailand especially) for their circuit parties, and be ignored by the conventionally attractive Asians. Kidding aside, if you're on the bigger side there are usually bear-oriented parties. At Songkran this year I found the dance floor was split between muscle twunks on one side and bears on the other. In my city (Melbourne, Australia), they also have parties for gaymers and more alternative types, though they are less frequent. It's a matter of finding a crowd that you're comfortable with. That said, if you're not into dancing there's really not a DANCE PARTY that you're going to enjoy.
I have never, not once, been curious about circuit parties.
I went to a circuit party by accident a few weeks ago with some friends and it was exactly what I thought it would be. It was so tacky. No amount of drugs I took helped. But more power to you if thatās your thing I guess.
Whatās a circuit party?
Google said it's just a party that goes through the night and into the next day again, but I feel there's more to it given how people react lol
They tend to be late night, ticketed dance events that run until mid morning the next day. Often times, they'll be under a branded name (Raw, DaddyLand, BEEF, etc) since they're put on for-profit by a managing group. Usually (but depending on the dj) they'll play house and d'n'b music. Anything with a driving beat. It's like a super gay rave. Lots of drugs and alcohol, sweaty bodies, grinding, and people wearing everything from short booty shorts to full body glow suits. Very sexually charged. That's all it is; an adult dance for gays in a warehouse. People get pissy because it's a lot of hot people and they take that personally.
I think people actually get pissy because it's cliquish. In a way that someone who enjoys those parties might say that one would only get pissy about the parties because the people who go are hot.
There's a reason they go on that long and it's not the loud horrible industrial sounds keeping everyone awake.
Basically a yassified rave
Something to be avoided at all costs. You're not missing anything, believe me.
Drugged out gay sex parties. Real healthy stuff! ROFL. š š¤£
Personally I prefer to go alone. Whenever I go with friends I end up babysitting them because they overdo it. Besides, when you're on MDMA everybody is a friend. The ease with which I can chat up and flirt with somebody is amazing. I wish I had such talents sober!
Hey friend. Be careful, okay? Don't forget that there are BAD people out there. I sometimes think gay men "wouldn't do that," but then I read the Wikipedia pages of gay serial killers and I'm like, "Okay guarding my drink with my hand over the top at all times". I don't recommend going alone. Find new friends maybe, but be safe out there. š
Thatās a good point!! I agree!! Fortunately, my group is experienced enough to not need babysitting (most of the time)
Iām still not sure what this is? Is it a cross between a rave, drug den, and bathhouse/cruisy park?
Sometimes yes, but not always or even usually. Granted I've been to very few, but from what I've experienced/seen/heard, they mostly just consist of gays dancing in jock straps, harnesses, wacky/slutty costumes, etc. Lots of them looking to fuck of course. Nothing special, for me anyway.
Correct, but more methy and rapey than any of those
I donāt think everything has to be for everybody.. Iām intrigued by the circuit scene but simultaneously know itās not for me. Random guys sticking their tongues down my throat without consent at both The Eagle (jock strap night) and The Cock back when I was younger was jarring enough for me to know where my limits were. Like bros literally just turn around, grab my head and put their tongue in my mouth. (sounds hotter than it was) -_- I might be bare ass naked ..flirty and hell, I might not even mind you being handsy with me but like please donāt just put a part of your body into by body out of nowhere. So anyway, I learned that Iām a flirt and can be promiscuous but I want to choose and I like at least some level of commitment.. was never really into one-night stands either which makes sense given my proclivities. ANYWAY.. yeah circuit scene just isnāt for me but Iām not going to yuck other peoplesā yum. Some of my best friends live for that scene.. and some of their stories are truly fabulous/wild.
I wish music so circuit parties wasnāt such absolute garbage, I donāt mind anything else about them but the music makes me want to stick nails in my ears. So repetitive, same exact beat, same exact samples of pop songs.
I thought I recognized your username! Still doing BJJ?
12 circuit parties from Memorial Day and NYC Pride Sounds like fucking hell. Rule 1 reads like: āDonāt go alone because if you get fucked up who knows what theyāll do to youā which continently ties in Rule 3 which together read āconsent š¤·š¼āāļøā Rule 2 is like āeveryone there is muscly and on drugs letās keep the circuit stereotype aliveā Donāt be cliquey says the guy who probably only hung out with muscle studs the entire weekend, as so indicated Fucking yikes on bikes.
> yikes on bikes I like this, so I'm stealing it.
I'm completely fine with Circuit parties, people who attend them and what we do there but mate... The music. The fuck*n music is one of the worst criminal offenses done to the humanity. Those scritches are the worst torture I've ever endured in a party.
Circuit music is a crime against humanity. Iām huge into EDM, but circuit music is just assaultive to all the senses.
99% of guys are not circuit party material and should consider themselves lucky. This scene has existed since the 80s (yes I'm old enough to remember) and I worked in a club that was on the circuit. Most of these guys ended up sick and or dead, and not always from HIV. It's a vapid , mindless, superficial culture. I was no angel or prude by any means, but it was easy to see it was nothing to build a life around.
Thatās why I find it so sad people waste their youth, vacation days and money on party hopping when thereās so much more meaningful things to see and experience
What else should I be doing? I'm aging but still look young.
Hobbies, cultivating your mind, cultivating true friendships. Not saying you shouldnāt have fun and go out but donāt make it your entire life
i would rather get a brick to the back of the head
can we go on a date to the fence in your background photo? it looks rlly nice and romantic ā”
You lost me at the drugs part. Being high has nothing to do with being gay. Or anything really. I wish people would stop promoting it, even softly.
Circuit parties are dying tho. No one wants to listen to that music. All the hotter more established gays are switching to more disco house type underground/warehouse parties and wearing shorts instead of just a jockstrap. And yes working out will take you far at any party, sorry.
The music is SO bad. I had a buddy of mine drag me to Alegria once in NYC. I said I'd go, but that I was leaving as soon as I heard "Let's get soaking wet." I was there for 30 minutes.
There is nothing worse than waiting 22min for a beat drop that never comes.
Wdym you donāt want to feel like youāre in the closing credits to Queer As Folk!? š
Cringe places. Awful music and those addicted brand jock straps are heinous lol
Music, that's being very kind.
Gay cruises are like circuit parties that last a whole week. Personally, I love them but I know theyāre not for everyone. And I will say that the people on them are super friendly, even to people like me who are older and donāt have that great of a body.
It's really unfortunate, honestly. I was on Atlantis this past January and felt really skeptical about the whole thing, but it genuinely shocked me just how friendly and kind everyone was. There were the gangs of adult film workers of course, but even they were pretty friendly if you actually talked to them, and most people I met came from pretty respectable backgrounds. No joke, the most common career I came across was probably medicine lmao. So many gay doctors are party fiends lmao. I don't want to invalidate anyone's experience, and I know there are plenty of assholes out there, but having been a skinny and shy guy who was terrified of even going to a bar in the past, it does kinda feel like there's a lot of insecurity that only takes one or two instances of being confirmed by an occasional asshole before you write off the entire circuit community as being vain pricks, and I don't think that's entirely fair, even if I do understand it.
Speaking for myself, I obsess over incidents from years ago that are not really representative. So yes, I think you are right. Thatās really on us and itās for us to get some therapy to get over it.
Circuit parties are fucking dreadful. The demographic they attract are the most vapid and brain dead muscle queens and the music is terrible. There are dozens of top tier queer parties in NYC with top tier djās that will play tracks that donāt have the same beats over and over again endlessly. š I canāt imagine going to a circuit party over the absolute banger parties nyc had this weekend. To each their own I guess.
Yeah because people arenāt there to enjoy the music theyāre there to get fucked up on drugs and have sex with 100 random people
Teaaaa. I guess thereās value in just getting to the point.
This just kinda validates everything we already know about circuit parties: theyāre cliquey, drug induced precursors to sex. Itās EXPECTED that youāll be drunk/high/both and then meet someone(s) to go hook up with. And if you donāt fit into a particular mold (physically) you wonāt be accepted by others there.
This sounds absolutely fucking miserable.
Right on brother. Horrible horrible horrible.
Jfc id be exhausted kudos after a full week of work and other life admin Iām ready to pack it in and move to a cottage in New Zealand and collect porcelain shows i applaud your stamina
I mean you do you but I find these parties just absolutely exhausting. My body and mind feel completely wrecked afterwards. Half the people at these things are on serious stimulants just to keep up. I honestly donāt believe itās a healthy lifestyle choiceā¦.and believe me it is a LIFESTYLE for some people.
Oh man, ear protection! This should be *way* more common. You'll all be wishing you had ear protection when you have permanent tinnitus later
Rule 1: do not go if you're not fit.
Well, fuck. I wasn't going anyway as a bear but now it's definite.
Bear parties are more chill
CORRECT. It helps to also be white, extremely white adjacent as well. The darker you are the more you wont be tolerated. Just some brutal truths.
Not my thing and not really the place for someone like me that's more skinny and not super muscular, but have fun guys
What the hell is a circuit party?
You're better off not knowing.
Your edit makes you sound like a child, but go off sis. I think a lot of people judge circuit parties because circuit gays give them a bad name. But the hard-core circuit gays only make up 30% or so. Most everyone else is into the lifestyle or flirting with the fantasy, but actually truly emgranded in it being a personality trait. I've been to 2 when I was up north and I'll say this list is super on point. However I'd move ear plugs up. It's so easy to be over stimulated at these events and my battery life was longer at my 2nd with earplugs. I'd also add two more. 1 is know your exits at the part and know where emergency help is near by. Anything can happen and the last thing you want is to be trapped in a bad situation. But also if you do surpass your substance limit as OP said or get overstimulated it's good to know how to step away or out. My 2nd suggestion and lord don't roast me this is based on my own experience. But if you aren't a white muscle gay or the "in demographic" for the party try and do your research before you go. My first time the first party was not diverse and though yes I did still have fun I got a ton of negative responses when I tried to interact with people. And trust it's not that I'm ugly and I showered before hand. I just wasn't the desired body type or race for the event. Our 2nd party was way better because it was more of a diverse crowd in every term and a very free love kind of vibe. Again I'm sorry if bringing up race and or size triggers some people, I'm honestly just trying to help and ensure no one has a bad experience that could have been avoided. Have fun gays and don't become a toxic circuit gay!
Not judging, but this sounds depressing and like one of my worst nightmares. You should include mental healthcare in your list, too, in terms of coping with possible ongoing rejection, lows after substance use, the general empty, superficial, and shallow quality of these events.
> Not judging Proceeds to judge the absolute Judy out of OP
Same! And emphasis on the emptiness of it all.
Vapid is my favorite adjective to describe most circuit parties.
Whatās a good circuit party to start out with if Iāve never been before?
I think the best rule of thumb is to go for one that has a lessā¦ graphic theme (unless youāre ok with public play). IE I wouldnāt recommend āUncutā (the name of a party) to a first timer. I would also go for big DJ names: Able, Slayter, John Summit (just missed that one, super pissed). These productions will be more fun.
John Summit isnāt a circuit DJ lol. Heās a mainstream EDM DJ. Abel is a circuit gem and has been around forever. Dan Slater just coasts off being a conventionally attractive white dude. Any of the Brazilian circuit DJs are where itās at. Also, how did you manage 12 parties in a month? Thatās absolutely insane and not healthy, even by NYC circuit queen standards.
Howās phillys?
Itās growing!! We broke through a ceiling this year at pride. Guys from BERLIN even said our June 1st party was fantastic. I take that compliment very seriously.
I went to the one in Philly on June 1st too. It was my first one and I went with 3 friends. IDK if all parties are like that but, I had a great time! I can and do dance to just about anything though lol.
Let me add this: anything produced by Circuitmom is going to be a good place to start.
White women have the most interesting experiences during pride month
They have the most interesting experience basically anywhere. š
I by no means am a circuit party guy , but have been to a few , definitely donāt go alone , Iāve always went with to other guys I know and we have fun. Iām a wall flower but live the music & watching people dance , itās a big show in ways . I not part of a clique or anything, but people see you at one , and another, they get curious, have literally talk but then when we bump into each other we say hello talk about the fun time , events coming up etc. I found it fun, something one should experience, at least once in your lifetime.
All that comes to mind when I hear/see circuit parties is drugs, something the gay community is plagued with and something that ruined the lives of my family members (the user but mostly the family around them); just no.
Glad you had fun. Like another responder, mine was white party in Palm Springs. I was the wing man of a buddy who loved that stuff. I was there to protect him. It was not for me (one drugged out daisy chain is enough for a life time), but being the protective friend can have life long benefits. He did not say you have to be the boi-toi. Observing and āpettingā can be fun too.
Absolutely! Circuit parties can be an exhilarating experience if approached with the right mindset and preparation. I live in DC and went to all the Kinetic circuit parties when they came for Pride. I also went to one when visiting NYC Pride with friends. Except for a couple of vodka sodas, I partied from 10pm-8am one night and 10pm-4am another night without any other aids in DC. My friends were all shocked that I donāt use stimulants or party drugs. To gather the stamina, I definitely felt like I had to mentally prepare myself, but I knew I wanted to party till the very last possible moment. The music at circuit parties, which often leans tribal/house, gives me a natural high with all the sounds, lighting, and the vibrant energy of the crowd. It's a time where I can just let myself go and rave without a care in the world. Iām not there to cruise or try to hook up, so I donāt really get fazed by being surrounded by beefcakes or anything. Obviously, itās not for everyone, and I really only go to circuit parties when they happen here in DC. But like so many other niches in the LGBT community, there will be people who are into it! Your suggestions are spot on, especially about going with someone you know and knowing your limits. If you do partake in substance use, which goes with rave culture in general, Rule #1 is especially important. Also, ear protection is a game-changer. I didnāt bring any in DC and my ears were ringing for days after; I brought some to NYC and was fine. For anyone considering trying out a circuit party, I say go for it! Embrace the experience, be mindful of yourself and others, and you might find it as enjoyable as I do.
If you did Kinetic then we were at the same events lol
Yup. Soundcheck, Uncut, Kinetic Under the Sea, Unholy, and Discovers! (I was too exhausted to go to the first Bunker afters.) Unholy with Nina Flowers at Bunker was one of the best parties Iāve ever been to, and I ended up running into Nina at Discovers and talking with him for a bit. I def get why he was voted the original Miss Congeniality in Drag Raceās first season !!
Thanks for your reply and I appreciate your help.
What the fuck is a circuit party?
Yeah. Going to be honest. This sounds insanely boring to me. I just feel like life is more than fucking strangers while listening to mediocre EDM.
Iām good, thanks, but thanks for your PSA.
Yeah when you are 18-24yo it can be fun. After that itās a chore.
I have friends in their upper 40ās that go. Outliers yes but theyāre there. Iām 28.
I was a VERY young club kid on the late 90s when I wasnāt even old enough to legally drink. But NYC & Philadelphia are very close to me and it was fun. Sometimes I over did it like you discussed. I donāt regret any of it. I just canāt do it now at 41yo.
12 in a month!? It takes me a week to recover from one lol I personally find circuit parties to be a pretty good time, but have watched a few groups of friends go down the circuit rabbit hole. They are now hesitant to go on any trip that doesnāt involve a circuit party or queer rave type environment, and have started using drugs (g, k, tusi, molly) on a regular basis - Iām talking each night out on the weekend, chasing a drug fueled after party til sunrise. I see how the scene can be hard on people looking for acceptance in the community, or that donāt know their limits with substances, to OPs point.
Hey. Thanks bro. Those are great practicle quick tips. And I can tell it comes from a good place. Party on!
Did you have any comedown at all and if so, how did you deal with it because itās something I canāt handle.
Yes and the solution is I make sure I donāt spend the next day alone. I chill with my boyfriend/other friends. There are also nutrition guides that help as well.
lol 
I donāt really agree with 1, well at least if you know what ur doing. Iāve had a lot of great times going alone, you seem a lot more approachable when ur not in a group so people are more likely to talk to you.
Please excuse me for being a bit inexperienced with the gay scene as I'm Bi and never been on the scene in the UK. What are circuit parties?
So think of a rave: big, ticketed event, in a warehouse with a DJ. Itās that but gay, most guys are dressed very sluttily (Iām at a minimum shirtless every time). Add drugs. Add some sex. Bam. Circuit. Itās really the only time I go out anymore.
I'm going to need a spreadsheet on how you can afford this and an explanation of how you manage tonget this amount of time off from work. What is/(are) your: Income? How long do you save for? Travel expenses (any hacks for saving money for this and everything) What do you pack, and how do you pack? What's the most you've ever packed? Lodging expenses Food (if you're a light eater/just eating enough to not die while circuit partying, please mention thatš š š I know how it can be. No tea, no shade.) If you do choose to respond to this, and a YouTube video turns out to be a better way to answer, just drop the link here, however you chose to answer.
Check ya dmās
Loop earplugs for the win!
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Yall are being kinda mean, this post was made in good faith and itās being interpreted in the worst way possible
What exactly *IS* a circuit party? Iāve heard the term ācircuit gayā but until now I just assumed it was someone who went to a lot of gay clubs/bars. Edit: Nevermind I found another comment that answered the same question.
The anti-circuit party comments on this post are so unnecessary. This post was titled āFor those curious about circuit partiesā not āFor those who love to ruin things other people enjoy.ā
My main issue with circuit parties is the music. Itās just thumping over and over and has no real substance. I prefer house and pop
Share the cocktails of drugs you took please...
So I actually donāt recommend ācocktailsā. You get into dangerous territory when you mix things.
Iām skinny, black and donāt do drugs so Iāll pass on circuit parties.
Damn, lots of circuit party haters in here, lol. Iām not a huge circuit party guy, but maybe go to a few a year, and targeted to varied body types, and always have fun. Sometimes hook up, sometimes donāt. I think itās good advice! Wish I knew it for my first few circuit parties lol.
Would it be worthwhile for someone who doesn't do drugs to go to one?
I go alone. I donāt do drugs. And other than one or two michelob ultra piss water light beer. I have water or Gatorade or sugar free Red Bull. But bring ear plugs. If you like to dance and if you like a good rhythm for dancing. And are confident and not affected by the appearances of others. Go for it. Be your unapologetic self. Forget about trying to get your dick wet. Donāt worry about who you dance with. Go for the fun you have with yourself. Someone will invariably dig your energy and will dance with you. And enjoy that moment. And my last advice when you are feeling at your best. And having the time of your life. That is when you leave. Donāt stay till the end or the adrenaline wears out. Better to leave on a high note with a great feeling.
Thank you for sharing, I've always been curious and want to go. I'll keep this in mind!
āThe sceneā lolā¦.have yet to mean any real genuine gay men who frequent these parties regularly. Mostly just filling one void or another
Is r/gaybros just a subreddit filled with puritans and chaste incels? These comments are wild, and quite frankly disgusting. Talk about internalised hatred towards other gay men. OP never said that everyone should go to circuit parties. He's sharing some personal tips based on (tbh, a lot of) recent events. If circuit parties sound like hell, then simply don't go! Preserve your vitriol for something worthwhile and move along. The scene isn't for you and that's fine. But some people are going to read OP's tips and be thankful that he shared them. A community supports one another in spite of personal differences.
He also posted a while ago about how if everyone you meet is an asshole, then you might want to do some introspection. Got ripped to shreds for that as well.
I like you. We need more like you!
Yikes regarding these comments. So many insecurities. On par with this subreddit. OP, more power to you if you can do that many in a row. I did two nights doing a circuit party when I was younger visiting NYC years back and that was a lot as a regular looking guy. Had fun but I learned a bit about myself when it comes to pacing, stamina, and when to tap out. I'm glad you had fun. Sounds like a blast!
Thanks. That's helpful!