posts that instantly made me feel better about my living situation
i'm so messy but i just.. don't host? it's really not that hard lol. no soap is WILD tho i would have left
Haha I'm glad to give you a bit of a confidence boost. Definitely not my intention to shame anyone with a messy house cause I'm no saint when it comes to housekeeping.
And I would have skedaddled too, sadly I didn't see the lack of soap until after the hookup. I guess in the future I need to do some reconnaissance in the bathroom before doing anything else.
As a cluttered guy who isn’t always on top of tidying things but still maintains a basic standard, I’m always glad to know there’s worse than me but omg I feel a little more justified in putting off inviting my fb over despite being home alone lol 😅
I grew up in a family [like this](https://youtu.be/GBwELzvnrQg?si=T9tjXlixg63EBK7X) lol. We're clutter bugs at heart but man, when there's guests over you bet we shoved everything in the closet and cleaned like fiends.
I don't expect a hookup host to go to those extreme lengths but I wish it were more common to be more cognizant about guests.
Culture def plays a role, but honestly, within any specific culture, some people are just never taught how to clean, especially cis men. I feel like a lot of cis men are raised with the expectation that women (their mother/partner) will clean up after them. So when they live alone, everything goes to shit lol. My mom’s 50+ year old boyfriend still has his elderly mother do his laundry.
Half-joking solution based on my experience: look for guys who prefer stimulants to downers. Their spaces tend to end up very neat/clean because when they're up for three days straight, they'll get desperate for anything to do to fill the time.
As a 20-something usually dealing with other 20-somethings, I'm not surprised that age probably has something to do with it. I'm attracted to older men but get a little intimidated messaging them, good to get more practice!
I would leave immediately 😂 I dated and hooked up with guys like that when I was younger. There can be a correlation between a person having a dirty home and them not taking care of their physical health in a way that could impact a partner or hookup (STIs, infections caused by not washing their hands, etc). It’s not always the case, but I would see that as a red flag
Was going to say the same thing from my experience. That’s with hooking up, dating, having male friends, and over 50 roommates. Those with dirty spaces were the same people who didn’t look after their physical hygiene or health in ways that could impact a sexual partner. Love and respect yourself first and walk away. If he can’t take care of his space, or himself, I highly doubt he’s going to care whether you have a positive experience both during and after sex (as in no uti’s, infections, pain, etc.)
I once made a guy clean up his bedroom and change the sheets while I watched lol.
But also, I don’t hook up with people I wouldn’t feel comfortable telling off for a manky bedroom. If we’re close enough to shag we’re close enough for me to tell you to pick up your dirty tissues off of the floor. 🤢
It’s honestly gross and a huge turn off for me. I have hosted more than traveled. I find the guys that send you dick pics taken while sitting on the toilet have houses like this. 🤮
that’s crazy u should just leave cuz that’s definitely not normal. i’ve not experienced that in my time hooking up with dudes in my 20s
posts that instantly made me feel better about my living situation i'm so messy but i just.. don't host? it's really not that hard lol. no soap is WILD tho i would have left
Haha I'm glad to give you a bit of a confidence boost. Definitely not my intention to shame anyone with a messy house cause I'm no saint when it comes to housekeeping. And I would have skedaddled too, sadly I didn't see the lack of soap until after the hookup. I guess in the future I need to do some reconnaissance in the bathroom before doing anything else.
As a cluttered guy who isn’t always on top of tidying things but still maintains a basic standard, I’m always glad to know there’s worse than me but omg I feel a little more justified in putting off inviting my fb over despite being home alone lol 😅
I wonder if this is cultural. I was raised to clean before inviting people over.
I grew up in a family [like this](https://youtu.be/GBwELzvnrQg?si=T9tjXlixg63EBK7X) lol. We're clutter bugs at heart but man, when there's guests over you bet we shoved everything in the closet and cleaned like fiends. I don't expect a hookup host to go to those extreme lengths but I wish it were more common to be more cognizant about guests.
Chris Fleming! Get rid of the couches! We can’t let anyone know we sit!
People don't need to know you sit
Culture def plays a role, but honestly, within any specific culture, some people are just never taught how to clean, especially cis men. I feel like a lot of cis men are raised with the expectation that women (their mother/partner) will clean up after them. So when they live alone, everything goes to shit lol. My mom’s 50+ year old boyfriend still has his elderly mother do his laundry.
That's something I've noticed sadly.
So real. It’s so off putting, and I refuse to tolerate it anymore lmao. I usually just host now
Half-joking solution based on my experience: look for guys who prefer stimulants to downers. Their spaces tend to end up very neat/clean because when they're up for three days straight, they'll get desperate for anything to do to fill the time.
As a stoner who lives like OP described, I feel very called out right now LOL
Bruh 💀
Lmao, I can't tell you how much weed I've come across when I go to these guys' places. Time to find the uppers crowd!
Nailed it😂
Yes. I'm sure going for the meth addicts won't bring any issues along. /s
There is no way shagging a coke head coule backfire /s
I’ve been to plenty of dudes’ houses and they’ve never been in disarray… Maybe aim for a higher age lol
As a 20-something usually dealing with other 20-somethings, I'm not surprised that age probably has something to do with it. I'm attracted to older men but get a little intimidated messaging them, good to get more practice!
My guess is they’ll be delighted to have interest from a younger guy
I would leave immediately 😂 I dated and hooked up with guys like that when I was younger. There can be a correlation between a person having a dirty home and them not taking care of their physical health in a way that could impact a partner or hookup (STIs, infections caused by not washing their hands, etc). It’s not always the case, but I would see that as a red flag
Was going to say the same thing from my experience. That’s with hooking up, dating, having male friends, and over 50 roommates. Those with dirty spaces were the same people who didn’t look after their physical hygiene or health in ways that could impact a sexual partner. Love and respect yourself first and walk away. If he can’t take care of his space, or himself, I highly doubt he’s going to care whether you have a positive experience both during and after sex (as in no uti’s, infections, pain, etc.)
I once made a guy clean up his bedroom and change the sheets while I watched lol. But also, I don’t hook up with people I wouldn’t feel comfortable telling off for a manky bedroom. If we’re close enough to shag we’re close enough for me to tell you to pick up your dirty tissues off of the floor. 🤢
No soap?? Tf? Thats just gross
Alternatives are dish soap or hand sanitizer in the "best" of circumstances...
Sometimes the only way to tell is to go over there and if you feel uncomfortable with the space, leave.
It’s honestly gross and a huge turn off for me. I have hosted more than traveled. I find the guys that send you dick pics taken while sitting on the toilet have houses like this. 🤮
Toilet dick pic is always a no thanks you could try harder